Chapter 33

"What are you thinking about now?"

Edwin hopped off the swing his uncle had put up for them in the back garden.

"Is there something you don't like?"

"..."

"Do you not like living here?"

"...It's not that I don't like it."

Edgar's lips twitched.

He hadn't done anything wrong, but somehow he felt like he was being scolded. As if he'd been throwing some ridiculous tantrum.

"So what, then?"

"..."

"You have to say it if I'm going to understand, Edgar."

Edwin made a startlingly grown-up face. Which was really just him copying their uncle.

Edgar snorted. Edwin came over to Edgar's side. Sitting next to him on the garden chair, Edwin swung his feet back and forth and ticked off fingers one at a time.

"You told on Adrien."

"That wasn't telling on him —!"

"Uncle isn't going down to the domain either."

"..."

"And the list of books Dad left, you're going to bring them from the house later. We don't know if all of them are there, but at least the plant encyclopedia and the foreign-language dictionary can come over."

Three fingers folded down.

"Is there anything else you need?"

"...That's not why."

"So you admit you're sulking?"

"That's not it..."

But the denial came out weak.

Edwin blinked and lowered his hands. It seemed to throw him, seeing his twin — who'd been so full of fire about saving their uncle — this deflated. He just kept blinking.

Edgar let out a long sigh.

Their uncle was over in one corner of the garden wrestling with the fence, insisting it needed repairs. It looked fine to Edgar. He had no idea what the problem was.

"So what is it this time?"

Edwin asked, exasperated, studying Edgar's face.

Edgar was the one who was frustrated. He didn't know how to explain any of it to his younger brother, or how much of it to explain at all.

Actually, worrying about it was pointless. At this stage there was nothing left to hide from Edwin. Edgar's hand twitched.

"Where's the bear?"

Unable to wait for Edgar's mouth to open, Edwin spoke first.

It wasn't the question Edgar had been expecting.

"What?"

"The teddy bear. Where'd you leave it?"

"...In the bedroom?"

"Carry it around."

"Why?"

"You get nervous without it, Edgar."

"Me? What are you talking about?"

"Carry it around. Then Uncle listens to you better."

"That's not why I carry it around..."

Edgar sighed again.

Even bickering with Edwin didn't feel the way it used to.

Had the thrill of his uncle being alive really only lasted a month? Maybe it was the funeral. Who could have guessed that the funeral of the illustrious Count Albrecht Bertholdt — the man whose shadow Edgar Bertholdt had lived in all his life — would turn out to be that sparse?

If the King hadn't sent the royal guard, they'd have had trouble even lowering the coffin.

"..."

But that wasn't the main thing that had Edgar stuck in his own head either.

"There's too much I don't know."

"Edgar."

Edwin's voice went stern.

Edgar quickly added:

"I know, I know. I saved Uncle, and that's why everything is different. I know things are so much better."

Knowing that didn't make the frustration go away.

If anything, that was where it started.

"...I don't know what to do next."

Had he really saved his uncle? He'd vaguely assumed that as long as they didn't go down to the domain, his uncle wouldn't die. He still didn't think that was wrong.

But they hadn't caught the person who'd killed his uncle. As long as the culprit was free, it wasn't a real solution.

Edgar still had an uncle to save....

"Moving here is fine. The Archibald estate wasn't bad. But there were too many people I didn't know."

He didn't know who to trust.

The people Edgar was certain he could trust were Edwin and their uncle. Just the two of them.

The Archibald estate had too many people he didn't know, and it wasn't just people — the space itself was unfamiliar.

So it was easier on his mind to be somewhere small enough to take in at a glance, with people he could trust.

It had to be the same for their uncle.

Their uncle tried his best not to show it in front of Edgar and Edwin, but of course Edgar had noticed how wound-up he'd been since the kidnapping. If Edgar had really been a small child, he probably wouldn't have picked up on it.

After the kidnapping, unless it was absolutely unavoidable, their uncle didn't leave Edgar and Edwin's side. Edgar had figured out that he even looked in on the bedroom once or twice during the night.

"Moving is fine, but you don't like that we moved?"

"There's nothing I can do from here..."

Yes. That was what was really eating at Edgar.

The body of a small child came with its own long list of limits to begin with. What was he supposed to get done in a body whose eyes closed on their own by nine at night?

"They still haven't caught Adrien. Just because we didn't go down to the domain doesn't mean I'm sure Uncle is actually safe...."

"But then what could you do about it, Edgar?"

Sometimes small children were the most brutal.

Edgar flinched and hunched his shoulders. If he'd had the bear with him, he could at least have hidden his face in it. He hated to admit it, but Edwin was right. Maybe he really did need the bear after all.

Edwin looked at Edgar with a wry smile.

That too made Edgar feel bad. However grown-up he could seem, Edwin was different from Edgar. And Edgar had piled far too much on him. If he hadn't shaken Edwin awake the night he came back, when Edwin had been sobbing his heart out in his sleep, his twin might have gotten to stay a little kid a while longer.

Instead of soothing him like this.

"Sorry, Edgar. I wasn't trying to blame you."

"I know. But you're right. It's not that I think Uncle won't listen to us, but..."

He wouldn't let them do anything even remotely risky.

Edgar understood how their uncle felt, so he was fine with the move. Really. He wasn't reckless enough not to grasp how important safety was.

The reason he'd snuck out of the Archibald estate that time... hadn't been that he didn't understand. He'd needed to.

He'd promised his uncle he wouldn't disappear behind the adults' backs again, but Edgar was still ready to step in himself, whenever it might be necessary.

At the Archibald estate, that had been possible. It hadn't been his own house, but at least once you were outside, there was a street with people on it. If Edgar handled things carefully, he could find a way out to a different district.

At the Archibald estate, at any rate.

But here?

"Even if I want to do something, I can't...."

The King's Woods was man-made. It was too small to really call a forest.

But it wasn't small enough for a young child to walk out of unnoticed. And no one came here. There was a reason their uncle told them not to go into the woods alone.

Having listened to Edgar's worries, Edwin nodded with a serious face.

"Look, Edgar."

"Yeah."

"First, drop the whole idea of doing something."

"..."

"Usually, you know. When you try to do things like that, it just makes things more dangerous."

"I'm not going to do anything dangerous...."

"Edgar."

Edwin crossed his arms and scowled.

With his soft round cheeks, though, it didn't come across as serious as it would have from a grown-up.

"Weird people show up whether we do anything or not. That man last time — did we go to him? He came to us."

"So I'm supposed to just sit still like a little kid?"

"You are a little kid, Edgar."

Edgar's face didn't soften easily.

It stung, being called out by an actual little kid, but this wasn't something Edgar could just quietly let go of either.

They'd finally been given the chance to save their uncle! Of course he wanted to make sure of it.

Edwin, who always saw right through Edgar, was no different this time.

"I keep saying, I'm not telling you not to do anything. I'm telling you not to do anything dangerous."

"..."

"Being safe is better. I don't want you getting hurt, Edgar."

"...I don't want you getting hurt either, Edwin."

"Right?"

Edwin smiled broadly.

"And why would you think there's nothing to do from here?"

Growing up, people had often told Edgar he took after Albrecht.

Hearing his father's name — a father he barely remembered — brought up wasn't always something he liked. The dad Edgar remembered was always speaking to him with a low laugh and a gentle voice. However nonsensical the question, his father would explain the answer without ever getting cross.

Not a tragically dead genius.

His father.

He'd been proud of being told he took after his dad. But it was a heavy thing to carry, too. Because Edgar wasn't a brilliant genius like his father.

If it came to that, the one who took after their father wasn't Edgar — it was Edwin. In Edgar's hazy childhood memories, Edwin, instead of looking at picture books with him, had been reading the books full of words that their father read. When Edgar asked if that was fun, Edwin would just say he was only looking at the pictures....

"First, let's learn magic!"

"...What?"

Lost in the old memory, Edgar was slow to react.

Edwin grabbed Edgar's hand and shook it hard.

"It's wrong to think only we can save Uncle or do anything if we go outside the house!"

"..."

"Say you want to see Auntie Anne! Then Uncle will invite Auntie Anne over."

"Uh..."

"Or say we should go visit her. We have to go get Dad's books anyway, right?"

Edgar's mouth fell open.

"And besides Auntie Anne, there's Grandpa Mattheus. When Günter brings Nabi over, we'll need dog supplies too, so I could pester Uncle to let me pick them out myself."

"Uh..."

"You didn't think of any of that, did you?"

"...No."

Edwin burst out laughing.

"See. You always overthink, Edgar. That's the problem."

Hearing that bright, cheerful voice, all the worrying Edgar had done felt useless.

Edgar's lips moved silently for a moment, then he asked the still-laughing Edwin,

"Why... did magic come out first?"

"It's the best excuse to invite someone over on a regular basis."

"Not because you want to learn magic?"

Edwin tilted his head and gave a smug little smile.

"Magic isn't the point. It does look fun, though. Right now I want Uncle to teach me how to be a knight more. But."

"But?"

"Magic is something Uncle can't teach us. It's not like begging for Auntie Anne or Grandpa Mattheus — it's the best excuse for us to have a new person coming to this house on a regular schedule."

"..."

Edgar mulled Edwin's words over.

He didn't have Edwin's interest in magic, but it was the kind of thing their uncle would hear out without thinking anything was off about it.

"Then it doesn't have to be magic, does it?"

Usually a child had a private tutor until they went off to the academy. If their father hadn't died, Edgar and Edwin would have been getting tutors around now too.

At Edgar's point, Edwin didn't answer.

That stupid magic.

"Oh, but Edgar, did you not know?"

When Edgar's eyes narrowed, Edwin hurried to change the subject.

"The day we moved in, remember?"

"Yeah?"

"I woke up in the middle of the night, and someone had come to the house."

"At night? Who?"

Edwin craned his neck and looked around them. It was the first time Edgar had ever seen Edwin be that cautious.

Their uncle, still off fixing the fence, wasn't in sight. He was probably working on the gate.

Edwin whispered in Edgar's ear.

"The man from the funeral."

"...Duke Lambert?"

"That's him. Except he isn't a duke yet."

"...What was he doing here?"

"I don't know. Do you know him, Edgar?"

"...I do."

Edgar answered after a long hesitation.

"After Uncle died, he was our guardian."