Chihiro Hashima’s First Love

On the Sunday after Ashley called Itsuki to her office, Chihiro paid a visit to Itsuki’s apartment.

“Hey.”

“Hi…” Chihiro looked troubled.

“…You all right? You don’t look too happy.”

“Yeah… Kind of…” Itsuki’s concern was greeted with a not-so-nimble dodge.

As the two were sharing dinner together:

“…Listen, Itsuki,” she said, her voice heavy. “Starting tomorrow, there’s gonna be another little while when I can’t come here. I asked Kasamatsu to come over in my place, so don’t worry about staying fed or anything.”

“Is something up?” Itsuki asked.

“Yeah… It’s the same thing as before. My practice exams didn’t turn out too well, so I wanted to focus on my studies.”

She had taken a break from visiting Itsuki’s place for the same reason several months ago. Back then, though, her studies were a secondary concern compared to discovering that the pervert trying to pull her pants down all the time was Setsuna Ena, the illustrator. She didn’t want to run into him at Itsuki’s and have her secret revealed—that had been the real reason behind the break.

But this time was different. Her results were worse than last time—the worst ever, in fact. It was such a rapid decline that even her teacher raised concerns about it. Now she was feeling the heat.

“Ah… Yeah, I was about to say something, too. Now’s really the time you need to focus on that… It’s kinda bad if your results slip right now, isn’t it?”

“Yeah… It really is…” Chihiro nodded, her face dark.

“You have any idea why?”

She weakly shook her head. “I don’t know. I just don’t know why, but I haven’t been able to concentrate on studying at all. Not just during tests, but during class and at home, it’s like I just space out…and the next thing I know, I’m thinking about other things.”

“Other things?”

“Yeah…”

“Like what, exactly?”

Chihiro hesitated. “…About Fuwa.”

“…”

Itsuki fell silent, while Chihiro anxiously continued.

“…I don’t really know why, but it’s like I snap out of it, and there’s Fuwa all over my mind. I suddenly start thinking about when we went to Akihabara, or when we played games over here, and it’s like, what am I even doing? Or, like, I suddenly want to see him for absolutely no reason… And every time it happens, my heart starts racing and my head just blanks out… I have no idea why. I just…what is this…?”

She let out a sad sigh.

“…” Itsuki blankly stared at his sister, examining her. “…Ah, um…”

He tilted his head around, pondering something.

“…Ahh… So, like…”

Finding the right words was proving a challenge.

“…When you ask ‘what is this’… Are you really serious?”

He visibly winced as he asked the question, clearly suspicious of Chihiro.

“Huh?” Chihiro just stared back, confused. “What do you mean?”

She doesn’t seem to be faking it…

Granted, Itsuki hadn’t picked up on Chihiro’s secret after five years of knowing her. He could admit that. So maybe he wasn’t the best at gleaning her true feelings from one glance at her face…but Chihiro had no reason to play dumb about this, and if she was joking, it wasn’t funny.

Chihiro really didn’t understand herself. She really, really didn’t.

“Itsuki?”

“No, I mean, that’s love.”

He pointed it out as flatly as possible. Chihiro’s eyes widened.

“Love?”

“Yeah.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah.”

“What is?”

“What is? No, like, you’re in love with Haruto, aren’t you?”

“Huhhh?!”

Chihiro was incredulous. Itsuki couldn’t believe what he was seeing, either.

“…Me…and Fuwa…?”

“If it was anything else, I’d be scared for you.”

He had the impression from before now that Chihiro might’ve had a thing for Haruto. But he had no idea it had gone this deep, or that she was so oblivious to it.

“Love…? Me?” Her face burned bright red as she said it.

“…You really never noticed?” Itsuki asked, still doubtful.

“Well,” the blushing Chihiro replied, “I know about the concept of love, but…”

“You know the concept…?”

“…But I just didn’t know that this is what it is… This is the first time for me, so… But this is love, huh…?”

She’s so cute, Itsuki thought as he watched his sister blush.

She then proceeded to nod to herself a few times, punctuating it with statements like “Oh…” and “Okay…” until she finally smiled softly. “Thanks, Itsuki. Now I know why I couldn’t focus on studying.”

“Oh…? Well, great.”

“I’m gonna go tell Fuwa.”

“Oh. ………………………………Oh. ……………Wait, what?!”

The words came so naturally from her that Itsuki almost missed them entirely.

“You’re gonna tell him you love him? When?!”

“Maybe tomorrow?”

“That’s kind of fast!”

Chihiro looked at her panicking brother. “Well, the sooner the better, isn’t it?”

“Why are you in such a hurry?!”

“Well, if I can’t focus on my exams because I’m in love, I need to fix that.”

“Wow, what a clear, logical answer… You applying for any science majors?”

It almost made sense to Itsuki now.

“But… But please, Chihiro, wait a bit. This is really hard for me to tell you…but…”

“What?”

“………Well, to tell the truth, Haruto………already has someone he loves, and uh…”

“Miyako, right?”

“Oh, you knew? Yeah, I’m sure you would, actually…”

Haruto had made his affections clear enough to Miyako, even when everyone was hanging out in this apartment. There’s no way Chihiro wouldn’t know.

“…So you know he loves someone else, but you’re still gonna tell him?”

“Yeah,” she replied without a moment’s hesitation.

…Knowing Haruto as he did, Itsuki doubted he’d date Chihiro despite his feelings for someone else. He had spurned the advances of Ui Aioi just the other day, in fact.

“Why would you do something so…reckless?”

“Well, I mean, unless I spell it out for Fuwa, I don’t think he’ll notice.”

“That… You may be right.”

Even Itsuki could tell that Haruto didn’t see Chihiro as a love interest at all.

“So I’ll say I love him now and get him to start seeing me as a girl. It probably won’t go anywhere at first, but if I don’t give up and keep challenging him, I know I can get him to look at me. Wasn’t that how Kani was with you, Itsuki? She had no luck at first, but she kept hounding you and eventually you became lovers.”

“I think things are pretty different from me and Kanikou…”

Itsuki, after all, had fostered feelings toward her from the first time they met—and he wasn’t committed to anyone else. Still, though, Chihiro didn’t intend to go down in a blaze of glory for no reason. She pictured herself winning him in the end—and if she did, then Itsuki could do nothing to stop her.

But… Wow. No wonder she could hide her gender for so long. Her decision-making and commitment stats have to be maxed out…

Itsuki sighed a little.

“………Well…um…good luck, I guess.” He gave her a smile and cheered her on.

“Thanks!” she said with an undefeatable grin. “I’ll do my best!”

Her good spirits returned, Chihiro eagerly ate the rest of her dinner. Discovering these feelings of love for the first time made her spirits soar and firmed her resolve to tell him—that was clear to Itsuki. And despite his trepidation at whatever result might come of it, he really did hope things turned out okay for his sister.

“…Oh, I got a response, Itsuki!” she yelped. She had texted “Can we meet up tomorrow?” to Haruto and received “OK” back from him.

“All right! Let’s do this!”

“I’m sorry.”