Chapter 13: The Duke's Daughter Returns Home

Chapter 13:
The Duke's Daughter Returns Home

 

“I’M FINALLY HOME,” I murmured to myself. A dozen feelings blurred together within my chest.

It had been so long. Although this trip had been nothing compared to the usual social season, it had felt like forever—likely because each day had been packed with so many developments. The last time I’d returned to Armelia, I had felt no small amount of relief, but this time, it was even greater.

As soon as we arrived back at the mansion, the staff greeted us warmly. “Welcome home!” They were all smiling happy tears. I even began tearing up a bit myself. It was evident that they had all been truly worried about me.

“I’m so happy you’re back home safely,” said Sebastian. “Please go ahead and rest up from your travels.”

“Thanks, Sebastian.”

Normally, I would have headed straight for my study, but that day, I went directly to my bedroom. Everyone was right—I needed to rest.

First, I relaxed with a cup of tea that Tanya made me. A gentle breeze rustled the curtains. It seemed to beckon me over, so I rose and walked toward the window, from where I looked out over Armelia. My beautiful domain.

It was lush and green, and I could see the town off in the distance. I loved this view. When I thought of how generations of governors had looked out at this same stretch of land and at the people they protected, I was proud of the blood flowing through my veins. I let out an absent sigh. I was so relieved that I had overcome this crisis and that this land was still my responsibility.

“Oh, that’s right—Tanya, could you call Lyle or Dida in here, please?”

“Of course. Are you going somewhere?”

“Yes, but not off the grounds. Don’t worry.”

“All right, then. Please wait a moment.” Tanya excused herself from the room but returned promptly. “Dida just happened to be outside.”

“Thank you, Tanya. Dida, would you accompany me on a walk, please?”

“Of course. Where would you like to go?”

“To see my grandfather.”

“Oh, that’s all? Got it. It’s my job to take you wherever you want, Princess.”

“Thanks. Tanya, can you get the flowers ready? Would you please come with us?”

“Of course. Please wait a moment and I’ll get them ready right away.”

With their company, I made my way to the back end of the estate. It took about ten minutes to walk there through the thick woods. These woods were the final resting place for the governors who had passed on. Not in a cemetery, but here. I didn’t know the reason why. I was, in any case, somewhat envious that they were able to enjoy their eternal slumber on the land belonging to House Armelia, which was filled with so many memories.

My goal was the newest headstone. I took the bouquet from Tanya and set it on the ground. This was where my paternal grandfather had been laid to rest, right before I entered the academy. In contrast with my father’s typically stern expression, my grandfather had always had a very kind and gentle face. Grandmother had also been a warm person, so honestly I had no idea how my father had turned out the way he did. Anyway, I digress.

Since becoming the acting governor, I’d found myself thinking about my late grandfather a great deal and coming to this little graveyard often. I believed he loved Armelia more than anyone else I’d ever known. I remembered him gazing fondly out the window at Armelia as I liked to do now, holding me and Berne up to take in the view and proudly telling us about the domain. He was such a gentle person that, for a time, I’d had no idea how he had survived as the prime minister in the capital, working amongst the snakes and foxes. I’d wondered that often, in the beginning.

It was different now; every time I came across a lasting effect my grandfather had made on Tasmeria’s government, I came away impressed. I had to laugh at myself at the same time. I had been so foolish to think that I could take someone at face value and know immediately what kind of person they were. It seemed so obvious now, when I thought about it.

The grandfather I had known as a girl and the person he had been at work were two different people. On top of that, I had only known him when I was very young. He had been able to be precisely the person he wanted to be in front of me.

To the point, the only reason I was able to reform Armelia as completely as I was right now was because of the foundations my grandfather had laid. He had spent an enormous amount of time building Armelia’s infrastructure. As such, I saw his legacy everywhere. The evidence was clear; he had left an astonishing trove of plans in case of future disasters—plans that stretched on into decades of work.

I had to admit that, while I had been so focused on progress and development, I’d forgotten many of the basics. It was incredibly impressive that Grandfather had accomplished everything he had while still serving as the prime minister. He had truly loved this land.

“I’m home,” I said softly as I joined my hands in prayer. I silently apologized for bringing turmoil to Armelia, and I apologized further for bringing trouble to the family. Then I asked him to please watch over and protect me. Even though I knew he couldn’t answer, I talked to him for a long time in this unspoken way.

“All right.” I stood and turned. Tanya and Dida were waiting for me with smiles on their faces. “Let’s go back home.”

I began walking toward the house, my mind and heart feeling clearer and more at ease.

 

***

 

“I’d like more detailed information on what’s in this report. Call in the person who prepared it.”

Next, I indicated a towering stack of documents.

“I’m done checking these. Go ahead and deliver them where they belong.”

Now I had to deal with the smaller mountain beside it. I almost felt like crying when I thought that this was the “only” thing I had left to do.

“These budgets need to be redone. Too many wasteful expenses. If that amount of money is truly necessary, I’ll have to see more proof and a thorough explanation for the need.”

I looked toward the neighboring stack. The same went for those papers. I was sure the departments who had sent them would be less than thrilled to redo them, but the finance division shared my opinion.

“The bridge mentioned in this document is definitely deteriorating. Go ahead and start the necessary repairs right away.”

On the following day, I’d been cooped up in my study since morning. I was still surrounded by mountains of documents, but I was very slowly making my way through them. I wished I had more than one Iris to go around, but I silently chided myself for the thought—I needed to focus on work instead of entertaining frivolous wishes.

Each time I made a dent in the papers, Sebastian came in with another armload, so I truly wasn’t making any progress. Granted, if all the documents I had to check had been in the study all at once, I think it would have been too daunting to even contemplate.

Nevertheless, I felt my enthusiasm and motivation slowly chipping away. I knew I should have been grateful to Sebastian for bringing the documents in batches. He had a guilty look each time he came in, but it was no wonder so much work had piled up since I had been gone for so long.

On top of that, various projects we’d been in the middle of had suffered delays due to the church scandal and the time I’d spent in the capital. Many people in the government hadn’t come to work while I’d been away, and they hadn’t returned yet either. To put it simply, we were short-staffed, and it was becoming a serious problem. If it persisted any longer, the other Armelian officials would soon be under enormous pressure. More than anything, I didn’t want to lose anyone to overwork, least of all those on the front lines who had remained loyal to me.

“We should be getting tax reports from all the regions soon, correct? We have to finish as many items on the agenda as we can before then…” I murmured.

As soon as Sebastian heard that, the expression on his face changed drastically—in a bad way, surprise, surprise.

Yes, yes, I know. I knew that adding more work to the mountains everyone was already buried under would be a tipping point. But the tax reports were vitally important. They would tell us every region’s income and revenue, and we would use those numbers to predict the state of the duchy’s economy going forward.

If we were fortunate enough to see substantial income growth, then we could run some expenditure estimates as well. On an individual level, high income tended to reflect in higher expenditures. Meanwhile, for businesses, it meant more capital to develop future endeavors. Having all this information in hand was crucial to predicting and manipulating the future of Armelia. Things were still rough out there, and I wanted to hurry up and get a move on.

The sound of a quill scratching on paper filled the room.

“My lady, please take a break,” Tanya urged hesitantly.

Oh, I must’ve lost track of time, I thought as I glanced out the window. The sun was already setting. “Tanya? I’ve a favor to ask of you.”

“Yes, my lady?”

“Could you make a list of all the officials who haven’t reported to work since I was excommunicated? I want to see what they’ve been doing—and who’s in their social circles.”

“Of course.”

“Then I’ll take your advice and have a break. Go ahead and tell Sebastian to come here in a bit.”

Tanya bowed her head and excused herself from the room. I took a sip of tea, savoring the sweetness of it as I relaxed. While I drank, I read through a letter I’d received from the marchioness of House Anderson. In other words, my uncle’s wife.

House Armelia and House Anderson had been close for a long time, due to the intimate relationship between our grandfathers. They treated me extremely well and had been dearly concerned about me both after my expulsion and during my run-in with the Darryl Church.

House Anderson’s domain bordered Armelia to the west, but because a range of treacherously steep mountains separated us, travelers either had to navigate around the entire range or reach them by sea. Honestly, we were both so busy that we simply couldn’t visit each other often. Instead, we kept up with a steady stream of letters going both ways.

After I was done reading the letter, I decided I should probably get back to work. That was when Sebastian entered the room.

“I had a feeling you would resume your work, my lady.”

“Perfect timing, Sebastian. There’s something I want to ask you.”

“What is it?”

“I’m sure you’ve already begun recruiting temporary workers for the merchant guild, haven’t you?”

This initiative had been inspired by Dean, more or less. He had gotten his start there. The jobs weren’t high responsibility or high status, but they involved tasks such as assisting with calculations and sorting through documents. We needed more staff members in order to process these tasks more quickly.

“Yes.”

“And how is that going?”

“Not well, my lady. We’re in the midst of the busy season right now, so we’ve had numerous applicants. However, some other establishments offer higher salaries, and it isn’t as if we’ll accept just anyone.”

“I had a feeling.” I sighed. “I have a suggestion, Sebastian.”

“Yes?”

“Why not open up applications to the academy students attending the government track program?” I asked, and Sebastian’s eyes widened at the proposal. “The job’s responsibilities are all routine tasks. They can continue studying while they work. We’ll be grateful for the extra help, and they can get experience in the field.”

“Hm, that’s ingenious. I’ll contact the academy right away.”

“Here, take this.” I handed him a letter for the school. I figured I might as well use my status for all that it was worth—although I was sure that Headmaster Luka would think it an intriguing proposal and agree. “If the school says yes, may I entrust the negotiations to you?”

“Of course, my lady.”

“All right, then. I’ll leave you in charge of this matter.”

“Very well, my lady.”

I kept scratching my quill across the paper in the flickering lamplight. It felt like that was the only sound I’d been hearing lately.

“Mmm…” Once I finished writing, I set down my quill and stretched my arms up. The dreadfully unladylike sound of my stiff bones cracking and popping filled the room. Finally, I relaxed. I sank back into my chair, my arms falling limply over the armrests. It was terrible posture, of course, but I was alone, so it was permissible.

Slumped in my chair, I stared absently at the contents of the document I’d just written. Yes, that would do for the day. I realized with a wry chuckle that I hadn’t set foot out of my study since I woke. I probably wouldn’t even have stopped to eat had Tanya not told me to. I couldn’t shake the tendency to become so absorbed in my work that I lost track of everything else around me. I had been like that in my previous life, but I’d been that way as Iris even before I regained the memories of that life. The habit was ingrained in my soul.

“Excuse me.” There was a knock at the door and Tanya entered. “I saw the lights still on, so I thought maybe… And here you are, still working.” She sighed, exasperated.

I laughed. She’d been different since we got home, but in a good way. Her rough edges had once again softened, and she wasn’t as tense as she had been in the capital.

“Forgive me for meddling, but please go to bed,” she urged. “I know I don’t completely understand everything that you do, my lady, but if you collapse from overwork again, it will delay your plans even more.”

Although, her concerns for me hadn’t changed at all.

I laughed tiredly. “Yes, you’re right. I was just thinking of calling it a night.”

“I’m quite relieved.”

“But first I’d like to hear your report. I was waiting here for you, thinking you’d be finished at any moment.”

“I’m terribly sorry to have kept you waiting, my lady.”

“I wanted to wait up for you. Your report, please.”

She handed me a stack of documents, and as I read through them, she offered additional opinions that hadn’t been recorded in writing.

“I see.” Once I was done reading the report, I held the papers over the lamp and burned them. It would have been much more convenient if I had a fireplace, but since Armelia’s climate was virtually perpetual springtime, we didn’t have any.

At any rate, the documents were so sensitive that there was no way I could ever let anyone else lay eyes on them—especially not here, where I worked. I set the burning papers in a metal dish and waited until they were charred beyond recognition, and then I doused the flame with sand from a large bottle I kept on my desk for blotting.

“So they have been compromised…”

Tanya’s report had revealed the names of those working in the Armelian government whose loyalties leaned more toward other domains over our own.

“It’s a shame, but humans are fickle by nature, especially when they feel like things are unstable,” said Tanya. “No matter how honest and upright your organization, there will always be those whose loyalty wavers.”

“Yes, Tanya… Humans are fickle indeed. I know that all too well. But that’s not the only issue, right? You can say it. It’s easy for them to disrespect me because I’m a young woman.”

“Well…”

“It’s all right. It’s true. I want you to gather all the people you noted in that report. Where shall we do it…? Oh, I know! How about the new church?”

“Very well, my lady. But…all of them?”

“Yes. Honestly, now that I’ve read your report, I’ve made up my mind about what to do with them. I’d like to meet them face-to-face first, though. All of them. Although I doubt they’ll show.”

“Very well.”

“Oh, and Tanya? You did an incredible job, nailing down all those specific details. I think you’re getting better and better at this.”

“I do it all for you, my lady. And anyway, information is just information. It only becomes important after I bring it to you and you decide what is to be done with it.”

She had a point; information in and of itself was nigh meaningless. One wrong step and it ended up baseless rumor, nothing more than a delusion. In this day and age, when you never knew what was true—or what could become untrue if the wrong person heard you knew—it was hard to trust anything.

“Tanya… What am I to you?”

“You are my stability, my lady. My pillar of support.”

“I see. I know that you won’t waver. I feel that deep inside of me, and that’s why you serve as my eyes and ears. That’s also why I’m able to trust the information you bring me and use it without hesitation.”

“I’m incredibly honored to hear that.”

“Well, I think it’s time for bed. Will you straighten up in here for me?”

“Of course, my lady.”

 

***

 

The new church was absolutely splendid. It was lavishly outfitted, expressing the power and influence of Armelia—or perhaps that was going too far, the man thought with a chuckle. This was his first visit. As to why he hadn’t come before, well, that had everything to do with the reason for the church’s construction. He, along with a few other like-minded individuals, had abandoned their jobs and voluntarily stayed at home in protest of Iris’s decision to demolish the old church. Their opinion on the matter could best be described as righteous indignation.

They’d done so because they had truly believed they were in the right; after all, Iris had ordered the destruction of a church, which was the backbone of righteousness. Even after they heard this new church was being constructed, none of them had visited it because of their convictions—not even after Iris had been found innocent at the inquiry. In fact, their resistance grew after learning of her so-called innocence. It didn’t matter to them. Nor did it change the contempt they had felt for her once she was named acting governor.

They hadn’t been directly involved with the group who sullied her name following the old church’s demolition, but they still disapproved of her.

The man knew that it was in poor taste to have abandoned the governor; as her employee, he should have remained by her side. He thought perhaps it might have been better to speak out against her publicly during her excommunication instead of just confining himself to his house. Even if doing so would have angered her, he should have spoken to her instead of deciding words wouldn’t get through and that therefore there was no point.

In any case, it was too late now. That was why he had continued to stay at home. He was thinking it was time to tender his resignation, but at the same time, he wondered if it was even necessary at this point. That was when the invitation arrived—an invitation from the party in question, Iris Lana Armelia.

Although, it wasn’t an invitation so much as it was a summons to appear, or so he had thought when he first read it. It made no mention of his recent behavior, but he was sure that was why she had asked to see him. He did have to wonder why their meeting was being held at the new church.

“You need to settle things.” That was what he’d told himself before coming here today.

One by one, other people like him, those who had abandoned their posts, began to trickle into the church. The mood was heavy, and none of them spoke.

“Thank you so much for being here today.” Suddenly, Iris entered as well, breaking the silence. She wore a serene smile as she looked around the room. “I see some people chose not to come, but I expected that. It’s time to begin, so I’ll go ahead and say what I’ve come to say.”

Her voice echoed off the walls and ceilings of the chapel, reverberating inside the man’s body.

“Every single one of you here neglected your duties as government officials of Armelia at the time of my excommunication. I called you here today to speak with you. But first, do any of you have anything to say to me?”

No one spoke.

“All right, then. I shall begin. What is a government official?” Iris’s expression hadn’t changed. She was still smiling. But that just made the pressure grow. “You, over there.”

She seemed irritated that no one was speaking and called on one of them directly.

“A government official serves as an aide for the governor, performing any duties they are assigned in order to make the domain run smoothly.” The man delivered a general response with a smug smile.

Iris frowned and turned to the person standing next to him. “Mm-hmm. And what about you?”

The woman was startled for a moment, having been put on the spot, and she stammered. “I-I agree with him.”

“So then, going by your definition, during my excommunication, none of you were actually serving as government officials, no?” Iris asked with a chuckle, hiding her mouth with a folding fan. “Think about it. You defied me, your leader, and abandoned your duties without permission. If your job is solely to follow the governor’s instructions, and you did the opposite of that, then you’re clearly no longer needed.”

She watched as the blood drained from their faces.

“Let me rephrase the question. Why did you abandon your duties during my excommunication and stay at home? I want your answer.” Iris gestured toward the man, who had been watching this whole time.

He knew he couldn’t avert his gaze, but the intensity of her attention made him desperately want to. “Forgive me for being presumptuous, but I would like to ask you the same question. What does a governor do?”

He knew he should give a bland and inoffensive answer, but instead, that impertinence tumbled out of his mouth. His boldness surprised even himself.

“I don’t like it when people answer a question with a question,” said Iris.

“Nevertheless, we need that answer from you,” the man insisted. Perhaps he no longer cared what happened. It wasn’t as if he had pride to protect, or anything else at all. He had lost all that the moment he abandoned his post, as Iris said. All he had now was a desperate sense of resignation.

“The job of a governor is one to take pride in. They protect the citizens, care for them, and enrich their lives. They must feel a deep sense of belonging with their domain in order to oversee the people.”

“Precisely. And that’s why I abandoned my duties.”

Iris frowned, displeased. “You’ll have to elaborate.”

“Pardon me. I also believe that it’s the job of the governor to protect and guide their citizens. That’s why I abandoned my duties as an Armelian official following your excommunication. How can one guide citizens if they are accused of a crime by the church, which serves as the very foundation of our beliefs? Reformation is all well and good, but this incident caused the citizens to lose trust in those reforms as led by this governor—you. How can a governor inspire their citizens to dream if they are the one destroying dreams? That was what I thought, and that was the reason why I resisted you—why I abstained from work.”

“You’re awfully good at talking, aren’t you?” Iris’s words lit an indignant fire inside of him. Before he could object, she continued. “Are you sure it wasn’t because you felt threatened having a young girl such as myself stand above you, giving you orders?”

Her response extinguished his anger. She had identified feelings within himself that he hadn’t noticed—no, that he had purposefully avoided so as not to notice them. He couldn’t deny her suggestion. He had opposed her appointment as acting governor from the very beginning.

Why, he had thought, would someone who had been scorned by the royal family and refused to learn from it be chosen as the acting governor?

At first, he’d thought it was just a whim on the part of the true governor, that Iris would just hold the title in name only. Then she started poking her nose into all governmental affairs. In the beginning, it only annoyed him, but once her plans in the duchy took off and he learned she had the backing of the queen dowager…he began to resent her very presence. Yet he suppressed those feelings. It wasn’t until the excommunication that those feelings resurfaced and urged him to protest her by ignoring his job. However…

“I can’t deny that I had those feelings. But the things I just said are also my true feelings.”

“I see. Well? What do you feel a government official’s job is?”

“To protect the livelihood of the citizens and aid the governor in any way in order to enrich their lives.”

Iris let out a sigh.

Her reaction startled him slightly. He hesitantly lifted his gaze to look at her face. It was completely blank. Expressionless. Then in the next moment, a smile larger than she’d yet given spread across her face. Under normal circumstances, one might think such a smile on such fine features was beautiful. Instead, it was so incredibly fierce that he became intimidated.

“I see, I see. In that case, there’s no need for you to look as if you’re awaiting execution, then!”

The man hadn’t realized he had such an expression until she said it.

“A government official is an aide. An aide to the leader. And an aide must never disobey their leader. More than that, thinking so little of the citizens is, in short, a crime. There’s no need to feel ashamed if you took pride in defying me. But the scandal is over, so continuing to neglect your duties is delaying government progress, which in turn hurts the citizens. If a government official is supposed to serve the citizens, then you have failed, and you are guilty of a crime.”

“But you were falsely charged, and—”

“Please. Don’t pretend as if I have your sympathies, or as if you have any regrets for defying me. At this point, it would be nothing more than a nuisance. I’ve never once thought any of you were truly on my side, even from the beginning.”

“Well…!” The man was deeply shocked to hear this.

“I’m not asking for personal loyalty, nor a sense of obligation, not from any of you. All I want is for you to do your jobs.” Iris’s voice had taken on a quiet, lilting tone, but as she spoke, her words became stronger and stronger, like they were taking on a pulse of their own. “Do your jobs for the sake of the citizens. If you so strongly disapprove of me, then unite the public and overthrow me. You are no longer in a protected position. Your role is to protect. And you should take pride in that.”

The man’s heart felt hot, but it was a different fire burning inside him now. Was it excitement? Passion? He thought he could see the same heat rising from Iris—as if she were showing him a dream. How could such a small, delicate girl carry such an intense, searing flame within?

“Again, I won’t ask for loyalty. But I will overlook this incident. Now hurry up and get back to work, all of you.”

“You’re forgiving us?” someone asked. The man looked over at them—didn’t they understand that such a question was beside the point?

“It’s not a matter of forgiveness, because I don’t seek your favor. Therefore, your question is nothing. It doesn’t matter if you acted out of loathing for me or whether you bent to the will of others—as long as you didn’t betray Armelia or its citizens. I don’t believe you did, so I am inviting you to return. Because if you don’t…”

“If we don’t?”

Iris’s smile grew deeper. “There’s no need for you to know. Or are you planning not to come back?”

No one answered.

“That’s what I thought. Hurry up and get back to work. We don’t have much time.”

 

***

 

I stared absently at the vacant church once the crowd had gone.

“You were terribly stern,” Tanya said. “It wasn’t like you.”

I smiled at her. “What would be like me?”

Tanya didn’t answer right away. “My lady, forgive me for saying so, but I thought you were acting differently when we were in the capital. I felt like you were purposefully trying to make yourself out to be the villain.”

I blinked at her in surprise. “Perhaps the scheming in the capital did change me. Or maybe it started when Dida asked me if I was prepared…”

His question had stripped away any naiveté I had left. I had been focused entirely on the future, chasing my ideals as I moved toward it.

Since regaining my past life’s memories, I’d been guided by them—by all that time I’d spent as an ordinary office worker in a peaceful world. I had no intention of denying that.

At the same time, I’d felt like I was in a dream. Being faced with the surreal circumstances of my reincarnation had cloaked me in a strange reverie. I’d tried my best to ignore it, but Dida’s question had shredded through the veil. It had forced me to see that I lived a real life.

As the acting governor of Armelia, I was responsible for the lives of its citizens in both the best and worst senses of the word. The moment I truly grasped that, I said farewell to the innocence of childhood, which had been filled with nothing but pure and beautiful things. Simultaneously, my past self said goodbye to her memories of a peaceful life.

I could no longer afford any weaknesses; my enemies would take any openings to eat me alive. Never again would I stand for being subjected to an incident like the excommunication or otherwise being falsely accused of a crime I had not committed.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “I know that if I make a mistake and step down the wrong path, the people I trust will stop me.”

“Like Dida did?”

“Yes, exactly.”

My people acted to carry out my orders, but when they thought I was truly wrong, they told me so. I knew I could trust them to speak up. For now, anyway. I could trust Sebastian, Dida, Lyle, Rehme, Sei, Merida, and Dean. Every one of them would pull me back if I ever strayed from the right path.

Although I did suspect that Tanya would give in to anything I said. But that was fine.

“May I ask you something else, my lady?”

I nodded my approval.

“Why did you arrange this meeting in the church, of all places?”

“Oh, that?” I laughed. “Because I thought it rather fitting.”

Tanya gave me a puzzled look.

“This church symbolizes the entire scandal,” I said. “It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that it also represents the future of the Darryl Church.”

Father Rafsimons had said as much himself.

Father Rafiel was giving free medical treatment to poor citizens at this very church. It also served as a home for Armelia’s orphans. More and more volunteers from our capital were coming to help these endeavors. When he’d heard of it, Father Rafsimons had said this church was the very embodiment of Darryl’s core values.

“I don’t intend to hound the church, not aggressively. It wouldn’t be worth it.” I turned my gaze toward the altar. It felt like ages since I had stood there giving a speech after my excommunication. “I don’t know if God truly exists. I do believe. But that’s who I believe in—God, not the Darryl Church.”

“My lady, that’s…” Tanya’s face turned pale. I had, to be fair, said something rather heretical.

“Tanya, have you forgotten what the church did? They were supposed to act as the agents of God, but instead, they falsely accused me, put me on trial, and interfered with the royal power struggle.” I could hear the venom in my tone, even sharper than it had been in my head. “These so-called servants of God let their own personal greed and ambition usurp everything the church stood for. I suppose that sort of corruption is only natural for humans. And that is exactly why I won’t place my trust in the church. I can’t.”

At this moment, I couldn’t even bear to pray to God—not so long as there were people hiding behind Her name to further their selfishness.

“Remember what I said before? This is an expression of what I’m prepared to do. I have no intention of disavowing everything the church stands for. I know that we need faith to bring the citizens together. But this incident proved that the Darryl Church isn’t, at its heart, a benevolent organization. They are a self-serving political body set on manipulating the throne. You must not believe their claim to stand for the people. And I will fight anything that fails to stand for the people. Thus, I will not pander to the Darryl Church, nor will I do as they say. I will treat them as if they are my opponent on the playing field. That is my decision. I hope they pay me the same respect. Regardless, I will protect the people not by relying on God or pandering to Her supposed servants, but by fighting for them with my own two hands.”

I turned my gaze from Tanya back to the altar.

“I don’t regret tearing down that old church, or the protest it inspired, or being decried for my actions. But I do regret something—my failure to predict that demolishing that structure would bring about such a catastrophe.”

Tanya said, “I think it would have been difficult to predict such a thing. Didn’t your father tell you as much himself?”

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.” I laughed softly.

Just then, the door opened, and some of the children who lived at the church tumbled in.

“Oh! It’s Alice!”

“Hey, you’re right! What are you doing here?”

“Come see Miss Mina with us!”

Their cheerful voices echoed throughout the church. The children clamored as they dashed over and surrounded me.

I knelt down to be eye level with them. “Okay. But she might be surprised if I show up so suddenly, so why don’t you go tell her that I’m here first?”

“Will you really come, though?”

“Of course. I promise,” I assured them with a smile.

The children seemed satisfied with this, and they ran back off toward the door.

As I watched them go, I said, “I have no real regrets, Tanya—because I helped protect their future.”

“My lady…”

“You know what I was thinking? They’re little Tanyas.”

She gave me a puzzled look.

“They remind me of you when you were small. Your circumstances were far more terrible, granted. Even so, you were the only one I was permitted to take in at the time. Ever since, I’ve done my job because I want, more than anything, to protect children like you. So I couldn’t possibly regret a thing.”

“They seem so happy. They’re very fortunate.”

“Are you not happy, too, Tanya?”

“Of course I am. That’s why I know they will be as well. Because they’re little ‘me’s, right?”

I laughed out loud. I’d never thought I’d hear such words coming out of her mouth.

“I’m sure they’re very impatient to see you, my lady. Shall we go?”

“Yes, let’s,” I agreed, and we both headed toward the door.

 

***

 

“Miss Mina!”

Four children scrambled into the kitchen where Mina was preparing dinner.

“Hey, now! It’s dangerous in here,” she scolded them. “You’re supposed to ask me before you come inside, remember?”

“We’re sorry…”

The four of them hung their heads, which drew a wry smile from Mina. She put down her knife and crouched to look them directly in the eyes. “Well? What is it?”

“Alice is here!”

“Oh, my!” Mina exclaimed with surprise; she was so startled that the children seemed bewildered by her reaction. “I can’t believe the gove—I mean, Lady Alice is here! What to do?!”

“Children, I thought I told you not to go into the chapel.” Father Rafiel had been taking a break and walked into the kitchen, having heard the commotion.

“Father Rafiel,” Mina gasped. “Lady Ir—I mean, Lady Alice is here!”

“I’m aware. She asked to use the chapel for a meeting. Did she not mention it to you?”

“No!” Mina glared at Father Rafiel, who wore his usual serene smile. “I-I must prepare some tea right away! Ah, but first I should go greet her, and—”

“Calm down, Mina.”

“Excuse us.” Tanya called out at the same time. Therefore, Mina didn’t hear what Father Rafiel said—she had bolted toward the front door in a panic.

Father Rafiel chuckled and followed after her.

“W-welcome, Lady Ir—ah! Lady Alice! And Tanya.”

Even though there wasn’t a profound distance from the kitchen to the front door, Mina had sprinted at full speed. She was panting, both because she was out of breath and because she was so nervous. But when she saw Iris, she had to do a double take.

“No need to be so formal, Mina. And thank you so much for answering my sudden request to use the space for today, Father Rafiel.”

Iris greeted them both, pulling Mina back to herself.

“Not at all. I’m glad I could be of some help,” Father Rafiel said with a smile. “By the way, Lady Alice, forgive me for being so frank, but are you feeling quite well?”

Mina nodded in agreement from his side. This was the reason she had been so startled when she laid eyes on Iris. The governor looked much thinner than Mina remembered—and she was so pale that her skin was nearly translucent.

Iris smiled awkwardly as they gave her concerned looks. “I’ve been extremely busy with work. But thanks to you, I’ve finally caught up with a rather important matter.”

“Oh, I’m so glad to hear that! Was there something in particular you needed from us?”

“No, I just wanted to say hello. And to come see my friends, of course.”

“Your friends…?”

“Yes! Right, everyone?” Iris smiled and glanced behind Mina and Father Rafiel. She met eyes with the grinning children who had just appeared.

“Alice is here! Why’d you come today?”

“Guess what, Alice? I can read now!”

“Will you play with me today, Alice? You promised last time!”

Mina was powerless to stop the children, who eagerly crowded around Iris. Fortunately, Iris wasn’t at all bothered by the attention; in fact, she smiled at them happily.

“That’s right, I did promise!” she laughed. “Father Rafiel, Mina, I’m so sorry for coming over unannounced. Do you mind if I play with the children?”

“Oh, my, not at all! As long as they’re not troubling you!” Mina said. “Please come in.”

“Thank you.” Iris smiled down at the children. “Why don’t we do something new today and read to each other?”

There was a chorus of cheers as the children tugged on her hands and pulled her inside. Mina now knew Iris’s true identity, which made the scene beyond anxiety-inducing for her.

Meanwhile, Father Rafiel continued to smile warmly. “Mina, I know you respect her, but please try not to be so obvious in front of the children. They’re terribly clever, you know.”

“Yes…” Mina’s response was so half-hearted that the unspoken That’s impossible… was nearly audible. Father Rafiel had to chuckle as they rejoined the group.

By the time they were back inside, the children had already started playing with Iris.

“What are they doing?” Father Rafiel asked Tanya with interest as he watched.

“Apparently, the game is called Constables and Robbers.” Tanya proceeded to explain the rules to the priest, who listened with genuine curiosity.

“That sounds interesting indeed. I’ve never heard of it before. Did she come up with the game?”

“I’m not sure.”

Neither of them looked at each other as they spoke. They were both too absorbed in fondly watching Iris and the children. For her part, Mina seemed lost in thought.

“Why is Lady Iris so…” she murmured quietly to herself.

Tanya tensed at hearing her mistress’s name. “What about Lady Iris?” she asked sternly.

“Pardon me. I was just wondering how Lady Iris could be so very kind.”

Tanya’s eyes widened.

Mina laughed briefly at this, but then a sad expression came over her face. “We got her involved in so much trouble, but she hasn’t blamed us, not once. And here she is, coming over to visit.”

“Mina…” Father Rafiel looked at her with concern.

“When I think of how much Lady Alice endured during her excommunication—oh, we’re to blame for it! We…no, I—I should have been more aware of what was going on. Then she never would have had to suffer so. But we let her get involved and placed such a heavy burden on her. Yet she still treats us just as she ever did. We’ve nothing to offer, and she protects us. It’s just so sad to me. I’m frustrated.” By the end, Mina’s voice was trembling.

“Mina, it isn’t your fault,” said Father Rafiel. “If I hadn’t been so stubborn—if I’d come back to everyone sooner, perhaps I could have changed something.”

Father Rafiel’s words didn’t seem to help, because Mina only looked more depressed.

Tanya, however, did not indulge the mood. “That’s just how Lady Alice is.”

She didn’t elaborate. She didn’t have to either. They could see by the look on her face just how proud she was of her mistress.

“That was so fun! Would you mind if I take a little break?”

Iris’s voice interrupted their discussion, and no sooner were the words out of her mouth than Tanya rushed to her mistress’s side. She pulled out a handkerchief and began to dab the sweat off of Iris’s forehead and neck.

“Lady Alice…” Mina murmured.

“Yes, Mina? Oh, you look so stressed. Is something the matter?” Iris’s gaze flicked over to Father Rafiel questioningly.

An apologetic look came over his face, and he shook his head.

Mina piped up as well, shaking her head. “N-no, of course not! Everything here is so wonderful!”

“I’m glad to hear that,” said Iris. “But please don’t hesitate to let me know if you ever need anything.”

Once again, Mina thought, How can she be so genuinely kind?

She felt like she might burst into tears. What was she feeling? Sadness? Pity? No, it wasn’t exactly either of those things. She couldn’t put her finger on it, but that unnamed emotion rose up from deep within her.

“Thank you for being so considerate,” Mina said sincerely. “Although, um, Lady Alice? May I ask you something?”

“What is it?”

“Do you ever go out on the town?”

“Why do you ask?”

“I’ve been a bit worried. No one’s seen you lately.”

Iris smiled sheepishly. “I can’t show my face in public like I used to. It’s far more difficult to walk through town from a security standpoint as well.”

Mina’s shoulders slumped. As they did, Iris’s expression grew even more sheepish.

“That’s the official answer, of course,” Iris said. “But there’s no problematic reason, I promise. To be honest with you…I think I may just be scared, that’s all.”

“Scared?”

“Yes. Of how the people in town will react to me. It’s only natural that they’ll treat me differently now that they know my true identity. I understand that. But I caused a lot of trouble for everyone with this excommunication business. I’m relieved there were no riots, but I’m sure if I were to show my face, the people would have a great deal to say to me. To be honest, I’m so frightened of what they might say that I simply can’t go out like I used to.” Iris laughed as if it were all a joke. “A pathetic excuse for a governor, am I not? Please forget I said anything.”

Mina didn’t laugh in kind. In fact, the light had disappeared from her eyes. At the same time, she had an epiphany. She now understood what feeling was welling within her—despair. Grief at her lack of power. It weighed so heavily on her that it was physically painful. The urge to do something for Iris burned in her chest.

“Lady Alice…forgive me for my impudence, but…” Mina’s voice trembled. It was all she could do not to scream. “Please don’t take me—or any of us—for fools!”

In the end, her emotions were so uncontrollable that they broke the dam. Despite all her good sense, her feelings spilled out.

For a split second, Father Rafiel’s face was pure shock, but he said nothing. It seemed he had decided to let Mina say her piece.

“I know that from your standpoint, we seem weak,” said Mina. “We live in small, closed worlds, and we can’t possibly know everything our leaders are up to. It’s all we can do to keep up with our own little lives.”

The people went to work every day, came home, and ate. Then they fell asleep, woke, and started the process all over again, praying that the new day would be as peaceful as the previous.

They prayed because they understood they had to be grateful for that peace. They knew themselves blessed if they didn’t have to worry about where their next meal was coming from, and if they had a job from which they received worthy pay. The average citizen didn’t understand the minutiae of how governmental policies actually shaped their daily lives. They either thought it above their heads or gave up trying to understand because they thought something like: Even if I understood, it’s not like I could change anything, so what’s the point?

To them, the royal family and the nobility lived in an entirely different world. The only time these high-born individuals entered into their thoughts was when they heard particularly interesting rumors and the like. In short, that was usually a sign that the government was moving in a bad direction.

When jobs were scarce, no one had money, and the price of food at the market went up, the air in town became heavy, and the people grew dour and gloomy. Mina knew this all too well; she had lived in another domain before she was taken in by the nun who’d run the old orphanage. She remembered that, at such times, the people spoke out against those above them. That angered the authorities and drove them to further oppress the citizens, which in turn made the people even more rebellious. Such circumstances made the air grow even heavier.

To be sure, Iris’s excommunication had caused a stir—and yes, some people here and there still criticized her. But…

“Even so, we’re not fools,” Mina declared. “We understand how much you’ve done for Armelia!”

So many people had come out in support of Iris.

“Life is so much easier than it was before!”

“Our new governor really cares about us.”

“There must be some kind of mistake!”

Mina didn’t know all of what Iris had or hadn’t done, but everything she’d done in the duchy had made life easier for its people and brought smiles back to their faces.

There were more doctors to treat the sick, and with the increase in literacy, the people were better protected from traveling merchants looking to swindle them. Farmers who lived in the regions with poor soil had been given access to education and new means to make a living. The children of Armelia smiled because they could dream of their futures.

Every day, so many people spoke of Iris. They weren’t spreading gossip to entertain themselves—they shared exciting rumors they’d heard of her work and deeds, and they did so with smiles on their faces.

“We are weak,” Mina acknowledged. “But I won’t stand for anyone using our weakness to blame you for anything.”

Mina knew what it meant to be a woman, just as Iris did. Mina was slightly older, but they were of the same generation. Being a woman meant people thinking certain things about you. It didn’t matter that Mina and Iris were on completely different ends of the power spectrum—Iris had influence, strength, wealth, none of which Mina possessed.

But Iris was human, just like anyone else. Mina understood that well, what with all the time she’d spent with her. Iris wasn’t some intangible idea. She was a real, live, breathing person—one who stood before Mina at this very moment, so overworked that she was wasting away before her eyes. Mina couldn’t let her get away with this any longer.

If she did, it would just give those who already hated working women even more ammunition.

“Please, Lady Alice. Please don’t blame yourself anymore. I can’t forgive anyone who criticizes you, even if that person is you.”

Iris’s eyes widened, and then tears began to stream down her face. Her reaction shocked Mina.

“Ah! You made Alice cry, Miss Mina!”

“That’s not nice!”

The children chided Mina as Iris sniffled.

Iris shook her head, wiping the tears away. “No, children, it’s fine. I’m actually very happy.”

“You cry when you’re happy?”

“That’s right. Tears can come out of your eyes when you’re happy, too. And Miss Mina said something so sweet that all these happy tears are coming out of my eyes.”

The children breathed a sigh of relief, as did Mina.

“Alice, Mina, perhaps you’d each like a cool cloth for your faces?” Tanya asked.

Mina nodded through her own tears. “Ah, yes. Tanya, in here.”

And she led the way into the kitchen.

 

***

 

After Tanya retrieved dampened handkerchiefs for both women, Father Rafiel and Iris sat across from each other.

Mina had taken the children to put them down for their naps. Although they usually brimmed with energy, many were already worn out from their busy day of running around with Iris.

“I’m so sorry about today, what with the children demanding your attention, and then the thing with Mina…” Father Rafiel trailed off.

“Not all. I love playing with the children. You needn’t apologize. As for Mina’s words…I’m sorry you had to see me in such a state. I really did appreciate what she said. I suppose I’ll have to figure out a new disguise so I can go back to town incognito.”

Father Rafiel looked troubled. “You truly are so kind to others and so hard on yourself.”

“You think so? You know what happened in the chapel earlier, don’t you?” Iris asked.

Father Rafiel smiled tightly, but he didn’t chide her. Rather, he looked as though he had expected this. “Being kind to people is different from indulging them when they’ve done something wrong.”

Iris laughed. “I suppose you’re right. Now what’s our friend up to these days?”

“Serving with his peers. I think his time at the academy left him rather naive to a number of things,” Father Rafiel said with a new sort of smile.

Iris smiled back at him. “I’m relieved to have you watching over him. And I’m sorry for asking you to do this.”

“Not at all. I owe you an incredible debt, after all.”

“I see… Tangentially, I heard you’ve seen Noryu?”

Father Rafiel gave her a look of surprise. “You’re well informed, my lady.”

Noryu was a priest who had carried out the orders of the former pope during Iris’s excommunication. He was currently awaiting trial for his involvement, and he had been jailed in the capital until a verdict could be reached.

“He told me it was all your fault,” Father Rafiel said with a laugh. “However, I had removed myself from the power struggle in the capital of my own volition. It would have always been difficult to get the promotion he wanted while working under me. I suspect his resentment boiled up.”

“It feels strange to hear about clergymen yearning for promotions.”

“I suppose it does.” Father Rafiel laughed again. “Humans are difficult creatures. They all have different ways of thinking. You could gather ten people in a room, ask for their opinion on any given thing, and they’d all have something different to say. Even if they all believe in God, they all have their own interpretation of the same divine doctrines. I encourage you to ask a group yourself sometime. It’s quite fascinating.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“To the point… Those different opinions can come from different values. Noryu and I certainly differed in our values, but as we never discussed the difference in our opinions, we had no opportunity to express that difference. Consequently, his emotions became pent up, and the explosion was inevitable. This was a mistake on my part, one that ended up causing you no end of trouble. I’m terribly sorry.”

“Please, don’t be. Noryu is ultimately responsible for his own actions. But hearing your take is truly helpful. You’re right; as the one responsible for this domain, I need to consider listening to my people far more than I have.”

“I think you already listen to them. Then again, our positions have always been quite different. I suppose I didn’t expect that my words would actually be of service…”

“But you see, my position is the reason I should take my people’s voices seriously. If I don’t hear their opinions, I’ll end up forcing my own onto them. Even if I’m just trying to help, if I don’t really listen, their resentments will build up as well. I want to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

Father Rafiel looked thoughtful. “It’s funny…you act nothing like the rest of the nobility, yet you’re more noble than any I’ve ever met.”

Iris laughed. “I’m a contradiction, then? How would you describe me?”

“I’ve gone so long watching aristocrats serve themselves first and none after. You’re not like that. You truly love your people, and they truly love you in turn. Which is to say: It’s important to listen to people, but I’m sure that if you tell them how you feel, they’ll trust you. And they’ll follow you, no matter what.”

“How I feel…” A thoughtful look came over Iris’s face.

“Pardon me for speaking out of turn.”

“No, not at all. It brings me satisfaction to hear you speak honestly. Although I really should be going now.”

“Of course. Please come back again soon.”

Father Rafiel showed Iris to the front door, and Mina joined them along the way.

After Iris departed, Mina spoke in a quiet voice. “She’s an aristocrat, isn’t she? The sort of person a regular citizen like me dares not speak to… The daughter of a duke. Completely out of my reach, right?”

It sounded more like she was asking herself rather than Father Rafiel.

“So why is she so kind to us? Why is she always so concerned?” Once again, tears sprang to Mina’s eyes. “The old lady who owns the florist shop, the old man who runs the restaurant on the corner—all the people I see in town—they’re always talking about Lady Iris. Everyone here is unbearably fond of ‘Alice.’”

“They are.”

“So when she told us why she no longer comes to town—I cursed my own helplessness. I wondered what I could do, but I realized there was nothing.” Mina clenched her fists. “But no matter how much I hate my helplessness, I can’t hide behind it. I think everyone who knows Lady Iris feels the same way—not even just them. The people who knew what was happening to the orphans and regret not helping them, they probably feel it, too. There are so many people she’s helped who we don’t even know. So many lives she’s touched both as Lady Iris and Lady Alice.”

“I’m sure she’ll start coming around again. She said she was going to get a new disguise.”

Mina burst into tears. “I’m glad to hear that.” But through the tears, a broad smile had spread over her face. “I’m sure everyone will be so happy.”

“I’m sure you’re right.” Father Rafiel smiled back at her.

 

***

 

On the second floor of a completely ordinary shop stood a woman. Yuri. She wasn’t wearing one of her usual pretty dresses. Instead, she was clad in a plain frock, the sort you’d see on any girl in any town.

“Divan, why must you always sneak up on me so quietly?” she asked, annoyed.

The man approaching her from behind laughed. “Well, well. I’m terribly sorry about that. I’m afraid it’s just how I operate, so the young lady must forgive me.”

Yuri frowned. “Hearing you speak so politely gives me the creeps.”

“’Tis only fitting to speak in such a manner to an individual of most esteemed status, my lady. I really have to hand it to you. The prince’s fiancée? Brilliant.”

Yuri nodded stiffly. “You have my gratitude. You have protected me all this time, and you’ve always given me the information I needed. So, I always listen to you, and so, I’m here now. Well? What is it this time?”

“Oh, I just thought we could chat a bit.”

“Chat?”

“Indeed. You know the dress of Armelian silk that you were so fond of? A very small number of them have reached stores in the capital.”

“Oh, my. Yes, that dress was exquisite—I do want one.”

“I thought as much.” Divan’s look was inscrutable. “You should ask the prince. I’m sure he would procure one for you.”

“Do you think so, Divan? I think you’re right.” Yuri giggled, and her irritation dissipated as she smiled.

“Although it would be risky to do so. The prime minister’s domain has already amassed great wealth, and that purchase would put even more money in his pockets.”

“I suppose so. But Divan…isn’t that your fault?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Well, because of your blunder, that girl is still a member of high society. Even after I went through the trouble of introducing you to the pope and everything. But you flubbed that, and now she’s grown even stronger.”

“Yes, that was all due to my ineptitude,” he agreed. “I sincerely apologize that things ended up the way they did despite your efforts.”

“Honestly. Don’t make the same mistake twice.”

“Very well.” Divan eyed Yuri thoughtfully. “You really despise her, don’t you?”

“I do. I hate her. She was born with a silver spoon in her mouth, and she acts like she was entitled to it. People like her—I can’t stand them. I thought for sure I would get to see her fall from grace once she was expelled from the academy, but…” Yuri paused and peered out the window, almost as if she were looking for Iris. “When I was trapped in that little town, I just kept thinking…that wasn’t where I belonged. That someone as beautiful as me didn’t deserve to wither away in a filthy place like that. That’s why I worked so hard, and why I’ll continue to do everything I must.”

“You’re so determined.”

“I’m going to hold this country in the palm of my hand. I swear it. And I can’t wait…” Yuri’s voice cracked with excitement.

Divan had to applaud her.

“Oh, right, Divan, I did just as you said and pushed Van aside. He’s disappeared now… Are you sure that was the right decision?”

“Yes, yes. It was. He would have remained useless if you’d kept him around, in any case. Now that you’ve turned him away, he’ll be useful for the first time in his life.”

“Hmm. I can’t wait.”

“It will be worth it.” Divan smiled. “Relatedly, how is the prince doing?”

“Oh, he’s wonderful,” Yuri smiled as well. “Ahh, I’m a bit embarrassed to talk about him! But’s he’s just so adorable.”

“Oh, my. Should I be worried that you’re turning into your mother?”

Yuri’s mood instantly changed, and the air between them iced over. Her face was expressionless, but her eyes shone sharply. “I’m nothing like my mother. And I won’t ever be.”

Divan remained unflappable and laughed. “Pleased to hear that. Well, then, until we meet again.”

“Yes…until then.”

 

***

 

“Rudy, I’m done,” Alfred announced as he threw down his quill.

Rudius gave him a soft smile. “Well done, Your Highness. I’ll take these where they need to go.”

“Thanks.” Alfred let out a sigh that had been building up inside him. Now that he’d taken care of all the business at the palace, he could go to Armelia with a clear conscience.

“It should be fine if you take a longer stay,” said Rudius. Alfred had said nothing aloud, but Rudius had a way of responding to his friend’s thoughts.

Alfred gave him a crooked smile. “Yes, I think it should be fine. I’ve done more than enough. Although, I do wonder how we got into this position in the first place. What in the world were those officials thinking?”

“It seems they’re extremely short-staffed at the castle.”

The situation had deteriorated to the point that they no longer just needed spies in other countries and domains, but also in the castle itself. They were playing their game of musical chairs with the other royals, and everyone below them was fighting for power and position.

At this point, open attacks were expected at every level, but those required leveraging personal connections and bribes—and those who made serious plays kept on making fools of themselves. As a result, the truly gifted players never made a move in public, or even attempted to leave the field of play entirely. Alfred had picked up as many of those as he could and added them to his own team.

“Armelia’s workforce is also suffering, but I envy them all the same. They genuinely don’t have enough people. It’s worse when you have people but they’re simply unproductive.”

All of this back and forth in the power struggle had done horrors to the kingdom’s productivity. Alfred wasn’t sure how many actual public servants were even left.

“I’m going to rest for a bit. Wake me in an hour,” Alfred told Rudius with a heavy sigh.

“If you’re going to rest, why not go to your bedroom?”

“I’m fine here.”

“Very well.”

After Rudius left, Alfred let out yet another sigh and closed his eyes. Perhaps it was the exhaustion, but lately, he’d found himself thinking of his past. Memories from his boyhood. Most of them weren’t particularly good.

 

The first thing he remembered was being surrounded by adults. As the first-born prince, he was taken from his parents immediately after his birth and reared by caretakers.

He was a cold child. At the same time, he proved clever. From the age of about three, he became cautious of people and the motives with which they approached him. He observed the adults around him with great care, studying them to learn who meant what they said and who didn’t. Envy, greed, vanity, arrogance, wrath, sloth…he learned what triggered every sin, how they manifested, and what reactions they invited.

(He’d told Rudius of his childhood thoughts once, and Rudius had smiled, exasperated. “I never imagined a three-year-old would think such things, Your Highness.”)

Then Prince Edward was born, complicating Alfred’s life even more. Ellia, who at the time was just the king’s mistress, gained even more power at court and more people flocked to her side. Alfred’s mother, Queen Sharia, was humiliated and more or less lost her status.

Alfred’s memories of her were hazy, to say the least. He never had much occasion to interact with her, though that might have changed, if she hadn’t died when he was so very young. Those who had known her told him that she had been frail but gentle, and she had despised fighting. Alfred thought a person like that must have felt terribly out of place in the cutthroat world of the court.

Yet she had endured. Being sickly, she could have withdrawn to the palace as the queen dowager had. Perhaps it was more accurate to say that she remained despite herself. The king had been too attached to let her go.

“Why are you here?” Alfred asked her once. “You don’t belong in a place like this.” He said it from a place of concern. Seeing her treated so poorly day in and day out, he wanted to give her heart some ease.

Queen Sharia just smiled softly at him. “I love your father. That’s why.”

Alfred wanted to laugh and say, “I don’t get it.” He couldn’t bring himself to; he respected his mother too much. He understood the king’s love was all she had left. She believed in that intangible thing, and it kept her from running away. It held her to this dreadful place.

This amazed Alfred, not because he thought it was correct or clever, but because he saw such strength in his mother. At the same time, he had a powerful desire to blame the king for all the hardship his mother suffered.

The king was a person, but he was also an institution, a symbol and a tool who needed to represent the entire country. As such, he couldn’t always do as he pleased, even when it came to protecting his beloved Queen Sharia from the ire of Ellia.

Perhaps he should have devoted himself solely to the system from the start. He had put his personal feelings first when he made Sharia his queen. All the horrors that had come with that position weren’t her fault at all, Alfred thought.

If only the king had never set eyes on her. Then she could have fallen in love with anyone else and lived a peaceful life. She wouldn’t have had her heart broken or been exposed to constant danger. She would never have worn that sad smile.

 

Queen Sharia grew even weaker after Leticia’s birth, but the king only grew more attached to her. Of course, Ellia was unamused. Thus, she took action: to kill Queen Sharia.

Ellia had already gained control of the inner palace and those who worked there. No one had to tell Queen Sharia for her to realize as much. That was why she had told Alfred, “Protect Leticia.”

She didn’t say this to the king—she said it only to her son. Perhaps she had realized by then that the king was nothing but a tool in the hands of others. She had certainly realized that, at times, one must put one’s interests ahead of one’s relationships.

Alfred, wanting to keep his promise to his mother, acted immediately. He asked Rudius to help him see the queen dowager. Until that meeting, under the watchful eye of Marquis Anderson, he made sure that only people who could be completely trusted were ever allowed near the young princess.

Finally, the day came. Alfred sneaked out of the castle to meet his grandmother, the queen dowager, for the first time. He begged her to take care of Leticia, offering his own freedom as collateral.

From the moment he met her, Alfred could tell that the queen dowager was deeply concerned for Queen Sharia, as well as for her two children. At the same time, the queen dowager proved she had once been a ruler by demonstrating her cunning and forethought.

So long as Alfred remained in the castle, she said, the fight over succession would only grow further inflamed. She was additionally afraid that Alfred, being so young, would be swept up in the power struggle as a puppet, not a person. She warned him then and there that even if she took him under her protection, they would only be delaying the inevitable conflict. So long as Alfred had royal blood flowing through his veins, he would always be the first prince, and for that, Ellia would always be out to kill him.

“So,” said the queen dowager, “you must become more powerful. Learn to judge people so you won’t be used. Forge a shield with which to protect yourself. A king is the quintessential symbol of power—so he mustn’t let himself be taken advantage of. To hungry aristocrats, kings are like delicious nectar. If he shows the least sign of weakness, they’ll eat him alive, no matter how they wound the kingdom when they do.”

That was why the queen dowager wanted to avoid letting Edward become a prince. If he did, those ravenous aristocrats would gain a dangerous amount of power over the line of succession. Once they had that, the royal castle would begin to rot from the inside out.

The queen dowager heaved a troubled sigh. This succession crisis had become a deep abiding worry for her. “That is why you must gain your own power. And as you do, you must keep House Marea from matching your influence. That is my condition.”

Alfred didn’t even have to think about it. After all, power was what would keep him safe. Nevertheless, he realized it would be risky to gain influence too publicly. He couldn’t pretend to be an idiot, either, or he risked getting dismissed from court. At least for now, under the queen dowager’s protection, he could guarantee his safety for at least a few years and devote himself to his studies.

When he told the queen dowager his decision, she smiled. She seemed truly happy. “I’m quite strict!” she warned him.

“I’ll do my best to make you proud,” he said.

She laughed. He’d meant it in a stubborn way, but she didn’t seem to mind. “You’re a clever boy. I like you. Now become the type of boy I would regret ever letting go!”

Alfred had, by some means, just solidified her affection for him. She seemed almost ready to insist he remain by her side for the rest of his days.

“But take it easy on my old bones!” she said with a laugh.

Deep down, Alfred was frustrated by the state of things. By all rights, the first prince was the crown prince, expected to succeed the throne. But the queen dowager was right that if he didn’t grow powerful enough to even step into the ring when he was older, he should make peace with losing his rights. Even if he did manage to end up on the throne, he would inherit a kingdom at war with itself.

If that happened, he had no doubt that the queen dowager would use her influence to remove him from power and back the second prince. She would use the fact that she had overthrown the first prince to win allies from the second prince’s faction, and then once she had gotten close enough, would take control from them. She would use Edward as her puppet to establish the power she wanted.

“Yes, Grandmother,” said Alfred, all this on his mind. “I’ll do my best to remain in your favor.”

 

After this meeting, Princess Leticia was quietly removed to the palace, along with Alfred.

Days after they left, Queen Sharia was killed. Her doctor claimed that Ellia was responsible. She had been poisoned, he said. Yet he was powerless.

Even though the physician knew that Ellia had been behind the murder of Alfred’s mother, he had no influence to undo the cover up. And even if he’d said something, everyone who could have done anything was under Ellia’s thumb.

It was all Alfred and the queen dowager could do to protect Leticia. For the first time in Alfred’s life, he was left feeling bereft by his own helplessness.

Queen Sharia’s funeral was modest and small. After the event, the king was so distressed that he became visibly haggard. Seeing his father in such a state made Alfred feel nothing.

Worse, the incident made Alfred the primary target of Ellia’s ire. She had truly believed that the king’s heart would belong only to her once Queen Sharia was dead. But once it was clear that this would not happen and her dreams were shattered, Ellia cracked as well. She took on the role of a tragic woman scorned by the love she most desired.

Alfred never felt the least bit of pity for her. In truth, he was glad that he was able to see her actions so clearly.

 

One day, the king summoned Alfred to him and said, “My beloved wife bore me a daughter.”

Alfred’s first reaction was anger; after all this time, now the king asked after Leticia? He’d never cared a whit about the children when their mother was alive, that was for sure.

“I’m sure she’s a beautiful girl. She must look just like her mother. I wish to see her.”

The instant Alfred heard that, his irritation vanished. Instead, a chill ran down his spine. He knew instantly that this was dangerous. Leticia looked so much like their mother that the king would without a doubt instantly adore her. He would try to fill the hole in his heart left by his late wife by showering his daughter with affection. And that would make Ellia target Leticia.

Ellia already felt jilted. There was no telling what she might do if she saw the king dote on Leticia. The fact that his blood flowed through the princess’s veins wouldn’t even register in her jealousy-addled mind.

“The queen dowager sees to Leticia’s care,” said Alfred, choosing his words carefully. “She always says that my sister is the spitting image of you, Father.”

At this, the king lost interest in Leticia. He never again asked to see her.

 

Although it seemed things in the castle were peaceful again, Queen Ellia continued to target Alfred’s life and began dispatching assassins. He had no time to waste when it came to training to win this battle. As such, his skills progressed so rapidly that they left General Gazell tongue-tied. Alfred was so stubborn about his training that he made lasting connections during it. The general put him through hell—but only out of adoration. Alfred was truly grateful for it.

Meanwhile, being trapped in the gilded cage of the palace gave Alfred a hunger for knowledge. Within a few years, his existence had been largely forgotten, and he started to be more forward about going out.

Alfred sneaked into the castle and pretended to be a diplomat. He infiltrated the barracks and trained alongside the soldiers. He traveled to other domains and observed life there. Along the way, he recruited any particularly skilled people he met to his service. At last, he changed his name and attended the academy, then joined the merchant guild. By that time, the queen dowager no longer objected to his forays into the public eye. In fact, she seemed to take pleasure in it.

 

At last, Alfred’s thoughts turned to the day he’d met Iris at the palace. He wondered if she remembered.

She probably doesn’t, he thought with an inward chuckle. They had both been very young at the time, after all.

Iris’s mother, Merellis, had brought her to the palace for a visit, and the children had run into each other in the gardens.

“Who are you?” Iris had asked him, her large eyes sparkling with curiosity.

That had been the beginning of it all. Iris assumed Alfred was a live-in apprentice servant who worked at the palace, and they saw each other constantly after that. He came to look forward to their meetings. Most of the time, it had just been her talking away animatedly with her eyes shining as he nodded and listened.

Then, one day, she said, “I can’t come here anymore.”

“Why?”

“I have to start learning how to become a member of the royal family. So I’ll have to be at home all the time.”

“Do you mean…you’re marrying into the royal family?” Alfred asked tentatively. “You’re engaged to the second prince?”

“Ah! That’s exactly how Grandmother reacted! Prince Ed is such a lovely person, though.”

“Oh? And what makes you think that?”

“Well, I was at his birthday party. Everyone always says I’m cute, but you know, they only say that because when they look at me, they see my mother’s face. They think I’ll turn out just like her. The people who don’t think that say I look like my father. I think that either way, people are more attracted to my family’s power than to my appearance. When I told Prince Ed that, he laughed. He said, ‘I wouldn’t be happy if someone said I was cute, especially not if they’re just comparing me to my family.’ Then he said, ‘Make those people who compare you to your parents eat their words. You’re your own person, and you should feel confident.’ Don’t you think he’s the loveliest person?”

“Yeah…”

“That’s when I thought, ‘Oh, I want to stand by his side!’ My parents and grandmother were totally against it, though. But I begged and begged, and they finally agreed. In exchange, I have to go back to the duchy with Mother and study at our estate. I have to be able to protect Prince Ed from all the bad people.”

“Oh…”

“I’m going to try really hard so I can be with him. But I won’t be able to see Grandmother Iria anymore, or my father. Or you. I’m really sad.” Fat tears streamed down Iris’s cheeks.

Alfred smiled. He felt like crying too—because hearing of Iris’s betrothal to the second prince only spelled danger for him.

“It’s not like you’re going away forever. If you want to see someone, you can see them. If you really want to, you’ll find a way,” he murmured as he wiped her tears away. “Study very hard to protect the second prince so that the bad grown-ups don’t take advantage of him. Make him love you so much that he’d choose you over his own family. If you do that, your hard work will be worth it.”

Alfred could only hope that Iris would be able to keep the second prince away from House Marea.

It was a gamble on his part. Honestly, all he wanted to do was thwart Iris’s engagement to the second prince. But he couldn’t. First of all, he didn’t have the power to interfere with a decision the prime minister and the queen dowager had jointly made. Secondly, Iris was around the same age as Leticia. Her cheeks were flushed pink, her big eyes filled with determination. Just looking at her made Alfred feel close to her, for some reason.

“Never fear. There’s nothing to worry about. I know you can do it.” Alfred rested his forehead against hers. “I do this for my little sister to make her feel better.”

After that, he didn’t see Iris again until they passed each other in the halls of the academy. He wondered if she had been working hard. In truth, he was disappointed when he saw her again—though he couldn’t put his finger on what it was about her that disappointed him, or what he had been hoping for.

Only when he saw her again, working as the acting governor, did he realize that he had been wrong. In fact, he praised his childhood self for the hunch he’d had all those years ago.

Maybe he’d just been blinded by jealousy when he heard rumors about her at the academy…

In any case, the queen dowager had felt proud relief when she saw how Iris had grown at the Foundation Day party. Simultaneously, Alfred’s world began to take on new color.

In their bloodthirsty world, where everyone wore a fake smile, Iris still possessed the innocent smile of a young girl. But she also grew angry at the absurdity of the world, and she agonized over her own powerlessness. Alfred had thought she would show her feelings as freely as she had when she was young, but instead she mastered her emotions and gritted her teeth. She pushed herself forward, coming up with new ideas and chasing victory with pure determination.

Alfred was drawn to every part of her. He wanted to spoil her rotten. He yearned to sweep her up in his arms and keep her all for himself rather than risk letting her heart be taken by anyone else.

He chided himself for the thought every time. He told himself not to forget that the obsessed king’s blood ran through his veins.

Perhaps Iris wouldn’t end up like Queen Sharia. After all, she belonged to one of the most influential aristocratic families in Tasmeria. On top of that, she was highly educated. When it came to marriage, she could have her choice of anyone in any country, even another first prince—or Alfred himself.

Rudius had once pointed out that their engagement would benefit both Alfred and House Armelia. But if Alfred loved her, how could he ever ask her to join him on such a dangerous path? If he pursued her before he took care of Ellia, Iris would be targeted with a vengeance.

Even attending the Foundation Day celebration at the queen dowager’s express invitation had put Iris in danger. She had restored her reputation, but she was still treated like an outsider.

Moreover, even once the battle for succession was settled, Alfred was afraid of becoming his father. He feared the blood that ran through him, the blood of a man who would clip the wings of the woman he loved to keep her in the cage that was the castle. The man who would tell her: Look only at me. Who would tie her down until she suffocated and tear her away from every other person who loved her.

If Alfred did any of that, he would destroy Iris; she would no longer be the free-spirited, independent woman he had fallen in love with. It was a paradox.

At some point, Alfred would have to resume his public role in the royal family. That day wasn’t far off now, and it would be the end for them. If Iris couldn’t join the royal family by his side, they wouldn’t be able to retain their present intimacy. That was why Alfred just wanted to have things go his way, just for a little longer. Iris had taught him how to feel again. He would never leave her, not until he was forced to.