Chapter 33: Biting the Belly

Chapter 33: Biting the Belly

"..."

Lu Hechi hadn't expected that to be the answer.

There was a nagging unease buried deep in his heart.

He always felt like his brother's feelings toward him were lukewarm at best, like nothing really mattered to him.

He didn't care when another man put his arm around him, didn't care whether they slept in the same bed at night, and even in everyday conversation, he mostly turned him down.

Was this even love?

Lu Hechi wasn't sure.

All he could feel was that he had fallen for him himself—he cared about Shen Lanxue's mood, wanted to kiss him, wanted to be with him all the time.

In his eighteen years of shallow understanding, love was something you had to say out loud, so the other person could feel it, and proven through actions.

Besides, they were already married.

Expressing feelings should be easy, right?

Shen Lanxue noticed he was zoning out and asked, "What's wrong?"

Lu Hechi snapped out of it and shook his head. "Nothing."

...He was just overthinking it.

"Dad!" Little Star swam over to the edge of the pool and called out, "Come swim with me!"

Lu Hechi turned and smiled at him. "Sure, let me go get changed."

"..."

That night, Lu Hechi finished showering, dried his hair with a blow dryer, and even put on some body lotion.

He opened the bathroom door, letting the steam drift out.

Shen Lanxue was sitting on the sofa in his loungewear, head bowed, a sliver of his wrist showing as he swiped through videos on his phone.

The screen light cast a glow on his face, making his skin look fair.

Lu Hechi walked over and naturally laid his head on Shen Lanxue's thigh.

"What's wrong?" Shen Lanxue put his phone down and ran his slender fingers through Lu Hechi's hair.

Lu Hechi wrapped his arms around his waist, burying his face in his stomach. "Nothing, I just want to be near you."

"Oh, by the way, I'm going to be on a variety show—a friendship one." Lu Hechi looked up. "It'll be about a week long."

Shen Lanxue: "Okay."

Lu Hechi had guessed he'd react that way, and a flicker of disappointment crossed his face.

The more he thought about it, the more frustrated he got. He turned his head, used his fingers to lift the hem of Shen Lanxue's gray lounge top, leaned in, and bit a small mark into his stomach.

"Hiss." Shen Lanxue grunted involuntarily.

That bite had some real force behind it. Shen Lanxue's brows knitted together as he reached out to pinch Lu Hechi's cheek.

"What are you doing?" he demanded.

After biting, Lu Hechi pulled back a little and noticed that on the left side of Shen Lanxue's lower abdomen, on that patch of fair skin, a bite mark had appeared.

That was his mark.

A mark he'd left behind.

He felt a lot better.

Lu Hechi let him pinch his cheek—it didn't hurt one bit. Seeing that he showed no shame, Shen Lanxue couldn't bring himself to actually pinch him hard, so he simply pulled his hand back.

"Smack." He gave him a loud kiss.

Lu Hechi leaned in again and kissed the bite mark.

"Bro, are you even a real man?!"

Lu Hechi, lying in his arms, said, "I'm filming a show with other people, and you're not even the least bit worried? At least I'm this good-looking."

Shen Lanxue looked down to meet his eyes, his thumb brushing over Lu Hechi's thick eyelashes.

Lu Hechi blinked from the ticklish feeling, then heard Shen Lanxue ask calmly, "Would it even help if I were worried?"

"Why wouldn't it help?" Lu Hechi grabbed Shen Lanxue's hand, wrapping his own around it, and said, very seriously, "If I ever do something that makes you uncomfortable, you've got to tell me. I'll change."

Lu Hechi paused, then repeated, "But you've got to tell me."

Shen Lanxue's gaze lingered on his face, silent. His index finger slowly traced from his eyes to his nose, then slowly moved to his lips.

Lu Hechi watched him, stubbornly waiting for his answer.

The air hung heavy with tension for five seconds.

Shen Lanxue gave in. "Okay."

Lu Hechi stared at him without so much as blinking. "Then tell me—about that photo. Are you really not mad anymore?"

Shen Lanxue: "...I am mad."

Lu Hechi thought to himself, I knew it. He knew it—in a normal romantic relationship, how could there not be jealousy!

"Then why didn't you say anything?" Lu Hechi asked him.

Shen Lanxue's lips moved, but nothing came out.

He had never been used to saying things like that since he was a kid. Whether he was angry or sad, he always dealt with it alone.

Even his parents had never cared about it. As he grew older, he buried all his emotions deep in his heart, and even the thought of saying them out loud never crossed his mind.

Lu Hechi waited a long time, but Shen Lanxue didn't answer. He lifted his head, leaned in, and kissed the corner of his mouth.

"Bro, don't be upset, and don't get the wrong idea."

He smiled and grabbed Shen Lanxue's hand, pressing it over his heart. "There's only you in here. Feel it—isn't it racing?"

Under his palm, he felt a clear, powerful heartbeat.

"Thump, thump, thump—"

This sound traveled through Shen Lanxue's veins all the way to his heart.

Both hearts quickened at the same time.

Beating.

The room fell silent, leaving only the deafening sound of heartbeats.

"How is it? Can you feel it?" Lu Hechi asked.

A thick scab fell off Shen Lanxue, and he couldn't quite describe the feeling—perhaps it was... or perhaps it was joy.

Being seen and then cherished like that made his eyes unconsciously curve into a smile.

Shen Lanxue smiled, his slender fingers twirling Lu Hechi's short hair.

"Yeah, I feel it."

This night was quiet, and the two held each other like they did every day.

But this time, their hearts felt closer.

"..."

When Lu Hechi was sleeping in the latter part of the night, his mind was in a daze, fragmented images replaying over and over.

But they were blurry.

He walked down a pitch-black corridor, running as hard as he could, desperate to see those images clearly.

But they drifted further and further away.

Further and further away.

Lu Hechi jolted awake, a sharp pain stabbing the back of his head, cold sweat frantically seeping from his forehead.

He didn't want to disturb Shen Lanxue's sleep, so he gritted his teeth and bore it, tears uncontrollably welling up from his eyes.

When the pain finally got truly unbearable, he carefully pulled Shen Lanxue's hand away. He slipped out of bed as quietly as he could, pushed open the balcony door, and sat outside.

A crescent moon hung in the sky, a hazy, thin layer of light in the night.

Lu Hechi felt a bit better at this point, but the back of his head still throbbed. He remembered those blurry images from his dream—so many people, but none of their faces clear.

The night breeze brushed his face, and the cold sweat froze on his skin.

Only then did Lu Hechi realize there were no stars that night.

He sat on the balcony for a bit, waiting until the pain at the back of his head had completely receded before getting up and going back to the room.

His body had already turned cold.

He stood at the door and rubbed his arms.

Only when his fingertips regained their warmth did he get back into bed and pull Shen Lanxue back into his arms.