Chapter 124: Tea Eggs

Oh, it was just testing medicine. A small matter. Pei Yuan’s heart settled.

But an instant later, he processed the request. His eyes widened, and he shouted in disbelief, “You want me to test the medicine?!”

Bao Ning flinched back in fear, worried his spit would spray her face.

Pei Yuan clenched his fists, his expression one of stifled indignation. “Where did you roll up these mud balls? They’re pitch black and stink to high heaven—you don’t even dare eat them yourself, so you’re telling me to do it! You’re afraid of breaking out in sores, but what if I break out in sores? Are you not afraid of poisoning me to death?”

“What kind of talk is that?” Bao Ning patted his hand comfortingly. “How could I poison you? If you died, I’d be a widow. I’m so young; I don’t want to be a little widow! How about this: before you eat it, we’ll find some small fish or shrimp to see if they get poisoned. If you’re still worried, we’ll feed it to a little mouse. I prepared this according to an ancient recipe, and the medicinal herbs used are all non-toxic—very common, mild herbs. Don’t be afraid. At worst, it just won’t work… but it certainly won’t kill you.”

Pei Yuan asked her, “Since it’s not toxic, why don’t you eat it?”

Bao Ning touched her own cheek, shot him a glance, and gave a fawning smile.

The meaning behind that smile was self-explanatory.

Bao Ning pinched her fingers together to show a tiny measurement. “Just a little, just a tiny bit.”

Fearing Pei Yuan would be angry, she tugged on his arm and promised, “A-Yuan, rest assured, this really isn’t poison. I know a bit of medicine; do you still not trust me? It’s just that the skin on my face is delicate. Usually, when I eat cold or spicy things, I feel uncomfortable. I’m afraid that if I eat this, I’ll get a rash on my face and won’t be able to face anyone. You try it first… I swear to you, the most that will happen is a few small bumps that will vanish quickly.”

Bao Ning’s voice dropped lower: “You have a dark complexion and thick skin anyway; it won’t show…”

Bao Ning leaned her face against Pei Yuan’s arm, nuzzling him with a submissive, pleasing air. “I’ll make you something delicious; don’t be angry.”

Pei Yuan wasn’t angry; he just felt helpless.

He rubbed Bao Ning’s head and coaxed her, “You are already beautiful enough. You don’t need to eat those messy things.”

“What do you know!” Bao Ning said with quite a bit of disdain. “How can there be a limit to beauty? The ancient recipe says these pills not only make one fairer but also emit a fragrance.”

Pei Yuan couldn’t understand and looked at her speechlessly.

How could there be no limit to beauty? He felt Bao Ning was already the most beautiful.

“You know about that concubine the Emperor has been favoring lately, the one called Consort Diexiang (Butterfly Fragrance), right?” Bao Ning looked up at him, attempting to persuade him. “She has a fragrance on her body, and butterflies linger on her. I heard from the servants in her palace that the entire hall she lives in is fragrant. That’s why His Majesty loves her so much, making all the other concubines jealous.”

Pei Yuan asked, “Where did you hear that? Attracting butterflies—is she a monster?”

Bao Ning said, “I heard it from Nanny Li in the kitchen. Her niece serves in the palace. From her description, Consort Diexiang likely took these Fragrant Pills.”

“How strange.” Pei Yuan’s attention had never been on the pills. He said, “Nanny Li must be nearly sixty, right? To think she’s still interested in such things, worrying about how a concubine gains favor. Women are truly interesting—always looking at their faces in the mirror, drawing eyebrows, painting lips. They do it for decades and never get enough. What kind of addiction is that? If the scholars and generals of the world had this kind of drive, reflecting day and night on how to study and improve their martial arts, how could our Great Zhou still fail to recover the northern lands from the Xiongnu?”

“I am talking to you about the Fragrant Pills,” Bao Ning said, her brows knitting together. “What nonsense are you babbling about?”

Pei Yuan asked, “Do you know why we and the Xiongnu have to fight an endless war?”

Bao Ning stared at him blankly for a long while. “I am talking to you about the pills…”

“Speaking of war, I thought of something else.” Pei Yuan stood up and pulled Bao Ning up with him, saying seriously, “I should teach you some martial arts for self-defense! Or give you some useful hidden weapons. If you encounter a thief again, you can poke his eyes out! I’ll show you, and you learn. First, let’s hold a horse stance together…”

Bao Ning shouted at him, “I am talking to you about the Fragrant Pills!”

Pei Yuan asked, “What are Fragrant Pills?”

“It’s this! This!” Bao Ning almost threw the box in his face, asking angrily, “Are you doing this on purpose? Talking so much nonsense to dodge the subject!”

…He had been found out.

Pei Yuan helplessly took the box and asked tentatively, “I really have to eat it?”

He resisted this not because he feared a rash, but because he was afraid the thing might actually work… If he really became fragrant, and his scent drifted for 10 miles on the training grounds, Wei Meng’s teeth would crack from laughing so hard.

Bao Ning was exceptionally stubborn on this matter: “I want to become beautiful.”

She had learned a few tricks—giving him a “stick” followed by a “sweet date.” Right after shouting, she hugged Pei Yuan’s arm and whispered, “I’ll make it up to you. I’ll trim your nails, shave your beard, and make pumpkin pancakes for you.”

Pei Yuan thought for a moment longer and reluctantly agreed.

Bao Ning happily stood on tiptoe to give him a kiss.

This single kiss made Pei Yuan’s heart instantly comfortable. He thought to himself: If I can get this kind of treatment, what does a 10-mile scent trail matter? Even if the scent drifts for 10,000 miles and I turn into a five-spice duck hovering over Great Zhou, I’ll take it gladly.

Fragrant Pills. Pei Yuan silently repeated those words. In a flash of lightning, an inspiration struck his mind…

Bao Ning didn’t know what Pei Yuan was thinking. She buried her face in the crook of his neck and took a sniff—a light scent of soap mixed with his own natural scent. She made a mental note, wanting to see if there would be any change in a few days.

“Let’s eat,” Bao Ning rewarded him with another kiss on the chin.

Dinner was quite sumptuous. Bao Ning had caught a slight chill last night, but after her “activity” with Pei Yuan today, she had worked up a sweat, and that small ailment was almost entirely gone. She ate her fill, watched Pei Yuan finish, and urged him to find Wei Meng. Much time had already been wasted; he shouldn’t delay official business.

Pei Yuan didn’t budge. He spat out the last bit of chicken bone and suddenly said, “Ningning, bring me that pill of yours and the recipe to look at.”

Bao Ning didn’t understand why but fetched them and handed them over.

Pei Yuan lowered his eyes and looked at them for a long time. His face was grave at first, his mind working through something, but a moment later, he suddenly burst into loud laughter.

Bao Ning felt his current appearance was terrifying, like someone who had suffered a “cultivation deviation.”

She regretted it and tried to grab the box back, soothing him: “A-Yuan, if you really don’t want to eat it, I won’t force you. There’s no need for this… We won’t eat it. Can you please go back to being normal…”

“You’ve helped me immensely!” Pei Yuan swept his arm around her waist, and Bao Ning fell into his lap. He pressed the back of her head and gave her a heavy kiss. “I don’t know how best to dote on you. In a couple of days when I’m free, I’ll take you to eat five-spice duck. That thing is very fragrant; you’ll definitely love it!”

He hadn’t shaved his stubble, and it pricked Bao Ning, leaving her dazed. What on earth was Pei Yuan talking about?

“I’ll be right back.” Pei Yuan left another kiss on the corner of her mouth and hurried away.

Wei Meng was currently washing his feet in his room.

He had heard from Nanny Liu that Bao Ning always put flower petals in her bath and footwater, which made the skin delicate and soft. He wanted to learn too.

He was indeed getting on in years and it was time to find a wife, but no one seemed to take an interest in him. He usually hung around Qingluo Lane and had a few familiar “consorts” there—clean entertainers who played music and sang. He liked them. He figured that since he couldn’t marry a primary wife, he could find a good girl to take as a concubine and treat her well to ease his loneliness.

It was better than staring at Pei Yuan every day with envy.

But when he asked the madam to inquire, not a single girl was willing!

Wei Meng was deeply shocked and pressed for a reason. The madam was embarrassed to say at first, but later hinted that it was because he was crude and had a heavy body odor—the girls didn’t like it. They even said his feet stank.

For those who practiced martial arts, who didn’t have a bit of body odor? Was that even a flaw? Wei Meng was indignant and followed Pei Yuan around for a few days to sniff him. Seeing that Pei Yuan truly had no odd smell, he became even more distressed. It wasn’t until this afternoon when he asked Nanny Liu that he realized it was because Pei Yuan sometimes bathed and soaked his feet with flower water alongside Bao Ning.

Such a simple method… he wanted to change too!

However, Wei Meng was a big man and was embarrassed to go pick flowers, fearing ridicule. After thinking it over, he bought several pounds of expensive tea leaves to use as a substitute.

The moment Pei Yuan pushed open the door, he was nearly choked out.

The heavy scent of tea, mixed with the indescribable “rotten egg” smell of Wei Meng’s feet—Pei Yuan had been excited to tell him about the strategy he just devised, but one whiff made him forget it all.

Wei Meng was happy to have found a solution and greeted him cheerfully: “You’re awake? You can really sleep. It’s good to be young. Come sit, come sit!”

Pei Yuan stared at the tea leaves floating in the foot basin. The hot water had caused them to steep and unfurl.

Pei Yuan asked him, “Why are you washing your feet in a pot used for boiling tea eggs?”

“…” Wei Meng didn’t bother explaining and stopped inviting him to sit, saying gruffly, “If you have business, speak up.”

Pei Yuan grabbed a stick and poked around in the basin, cursing, “Are you sick? You can’t tell a good egg from a rotten one? Hurry up and take the rotten egg out. What an odd smell—it’s nauseating!”

Wei Meng restrained himself from kicking him and shouted, “If you have business, speak up!”

Seeing him persist, Pei Yuan frowned but didn’t interfere further. He stepped out for a moment, took off his belt, tied it around his nose, and came back in feeling slightly more comfortable. Martial artists had a keen sense of smell; he used to think it was a good thing, but now he knew everything had pros and cons, and blessings and curses were intertwined.

Wei Meng said irritably, “Chang Xi is hanging in the woodshed. If you want to find him, go. I need to finish washing my feet.”

Pei Yuan felt he was acting strange today. But since there was serious business to discuss, he endured it. He sat a bit further away from Wei Meng and said in a low voice, “Let Chang Xi go.”

“…” Wei Meng looked up at him in shock. “Did… did I smoke you into a daze?”

“Regarding the poisoning case back then, all fingers pointed to me and the Eldest Prince. Since then, we have suffered unjust grievances and to this day haven’t found evidence to prove it was a frame-up,” Pei Yuan said slowly. “But if there’s no evidence, we can make it ourselves. Pei Xiao makes false evidence—why can’t we?”

Wei Meng noticed the item in his hand and asked, “What is that?”

“An ancient recipe.” Pei Yuan handed it to him, his chin slightly raised. “Pei Xiao’s Crown Princess will certainly love it.”

The moment he saw the name of the recipe, Wei Meng secretly swallowed his spit and said, “I saw the young Madam grinding it tonight.”

Pei Yuan nodded, confirming his question, and continued, “Pei Xiao relied on his houseguest to save the Left Minister’s son to win the Minister’s favor. Why not follow suit? Through the matter with Chang Xi today, let’s send a houseguest to Pei Xiao and win his favor as well.”

“Chang Xi is already a discarded pawn,” Wei Meng said. “Pei Xiao will certainly strike a pose and distance himself…”

A moment later, he understood. He met Pei Yuan’s gaze and said, “I see your plan! You want to stage a play of a loyal houseguest risking his life to save a person, letting that guest show his face before Pei Xiao. That way, regardless of whether Chang Xi stays by Pei Xiao’s side, that guest will leave an impression of ultimate loyalty and gain initial trust. And that recipe—do you want to present it to Pei Xiao through the houseguest’s hands?”

“It’s for Gao Feihe.” Pei Yuan’s fingers tapped the armrest of his chair, his gaze distant. “Before long, when the Mid-Autumn moon is full, there will be a family banquet. If the Grand Tutor’s beloved granddaughter dies at the banquet because she took a pill Pei Xiao made for her…”

Wei Meng’s eyes lit up, and his fists on his knees clenched with excitement. “This plan is brilliant, but there are still some loopholes and improprieties. We must plan carefully!”

Pei Yuan stood up and said, “We’ll talk tomorrow.” He shot a glance at Wei Meng. “I really can’t stand this smell of yours. I’ve heard of people eating stinky tofu, but never heard of eating stinking tea eggs. You’d better eat less of it too.”

Wei Meng watched his hurried departure. He endured it, but finally called out a moment before Pei Yuan stepped out: “Young General!”

Pei Yuan turned back, surprised to see a flush of red on Wei Meng’s cheeks. Discomfort immediately rose in his heart.

Wei Meng was embarrassed and didn’t dare look at Pei Yuan. He turned his head and said hoarsely, “I have a favor to ask. I know you might ridicule me or refuse, but I still want to say it.”

What is it with tonight? Pei Yuan thought. Bao Ning was like this, and now he’s doing the same, speaking in such roundabout ways.

Pei Yuan said crossly, “Spit it out.”

“Those Fragrant Pills… I saw the young Madam making them tonight.” Wei Meng turned to look at him, suppressed excitement in his eyes. “Can I try them?”

Pei Yuan froze.

Wei Meng had expected this reaction. He hesitated, but his urgency to become “fragrant” was so great that he explained everything to Pei Yuan in one go.

Pei Yuan’s expression gradually became subtle.

Wei Meng closed his eyes, prepared to be mocked, but to his surprise, Pei Yuan walked over and solemnly patted his shoulder. “Good brother.”

Wei Meng was dazed. “Huh?”

Pei Yuan advised him earnestly, “Old Wei, don’t be anxious. It’s just that your feet are a bit smelly; it’s not a major illness. We’ll take the medicine properly, and things will get better. Women will like you; you must have confidence.”

Such warmth? Wei Meng was overwhelmed by the favor.

“Good brother, you can have as many of those pills as you want.” Pei Yuan’s gaze was full of concern, but he couldn’t hide his joy. “Brother will go get them for you right now!”

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