Volume 1, Chapter 170 – Lanling’s Dilemma

Meanwhile, elsewhere.

Empress Lingshuang returned to the Eastern Courtyard guest quarters and sat in silence for a long time.

Qingxuan’s cutting words replayed over and over in her mind, along with her own clumsy response at the end.

“Is your obsession with Little Sister Gu truly born of genuine affection, or…”

“Is it only because she was the first person who ever felt ‘different’ to you?”

“Or perhaps… you simply want to fight me for her because she’s the one I’ve set my sights on?”

Every sentence was like a spike of ice, driving deep into the place in her heart she least wanted to confront.

At first, she had indeed approached Gu Han out of a desire to compete with Qingxuan.

Whatever that woman Qingxuan wanted, she wanted to steal away just to spite her. It had practically become instinct.

Gu Han was mysterious, powerful, and unlike anyone else. Qingxuan had shown unprecedented interest in her, so naturally, Empress Lingshuang had refused to be outdone.

But…

Empress Lingshuang slowly raised a hand. A wisp of icy energy gathered at her fingertip, sketching a hazy image of that day’s battle beyond the heavens in the air.

Gu Han’s calm gaze as she summoned the Donghuang Bell.

Her profound insights into the laws of ice and the guidance she had offered during their discussion of the Dao.

And the grace she had shown by voluntarily stopping at the end, allowing Empress Lingshuang to preserve her dignity…

Those memories had long since branded themselves upon the lake of her heart, frozen for tens of thousands of years.

Competition?

Perhaps that had been her motive at first.

But now…

Empress Lingshuang closed her eyes and drew a deep breath.

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She did not want to admit it, but she had no choice.

Her feelings for Gu Han had long since gone beyond her rivalry with Qingxuan.

It displeased her when Qingxuan drew close to Gu Han, and it irritated her whenever Gu Han showed Qingxuan even the slightest indulgence.

Even a single approving glance from Gu Han during their discussions of the Dao could set her heart stirring.

This was no mere desire to win.

“Lanling.”

Her voice was cool and clear.

“Your Majesty.”

Lanling appeared in the room like a specter, dropped to one knee, and answered respectfully.

Empress Lingshuang regarded the female general who had served her the longest and whom she trusted most. A rare flicker of hesitation crossed her eyes.

But resolve quickly replaced it.

She needed someone with whom she could share her innermost thoughts, and Lanling was the best choice.

“Rise. Sit.”

Empress Lingshuang pointed to the chair opposite her.

Lanling paused, surprise flickering in her eyes.

Her Majesty had never asked her to sit during a report before.

But she asked no questions. She rose as instructed and sat upright in the ice-jade chair, her back straight and her gaze steady as she awaited her orders.

Empress Lingshuang was silent for a moment, seemingly gathering her thoughts.

The room was utterly still, disturbed only by the occasional chirp of insects outside the window and the distant murmur of Yaochi’s waters.

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After a long while, Empress Lingshuang finally spoke. Her voice was lower than usual, with a faint, almost imperceptible rasp.

“Lanling, how long have you served me?”

Lanling was even more surprised, but she still answered respectfully.

“Your Majesty, it has been seventeen thousand years.”

“Seventeen thousand years…”

Empress Lingshuang repeated the words under her breath, her fingertips tapping lightly against the armrest.

“In all those seventeen thousand years, have you ever seen me treat anyone… differently?”

Lanling’s heart jolted.

In an instant, she understood the reason for Her Majesty’s strange behavior tonight.

The confrontation between the two Empresses outside the main hall earlier that day, the complex, inscrutable expression on Her Majesty’s face when she had just returned from there…

Suddenly, it all made sense.

Lanling drew a deep breath, suppressed the storm raging within her, and spoke cautiously.

“Is Your Majesty referring to Palace Master Gu?”

Empress Lingshuang did not deny it. She merely raised her eyes to Lanling, a trace of scrutiny and… rare bewilderment in her ice-blue gaze.

“How do you think I feel about her?”

Lanling fell silent for a moment, weighing her words.

“Your Majesty certainly treats Palace Master Gu differently from everyone else.”

She spoke slowly, her voice clear and objective.

“Your Majesty has never cared for closeness and dislikes pointless socializing even more.”

“But with Palace Master Gu, not only did Your Majesty take the initiative to discuss the Dao with her, but you also chose to remain at Yaochi Immortal Palace.”

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“When Your Majesty discusses the Dao with Palace Master Gu, the focus and admiration in your eyes are unlike anything I have ever seen before.”

“And…”

Lanling paused and studied Her Majesty’s expression before continuing.

“Your Majesty seems to have changed a great deal during your time at Yaochi Immortal Palace. Even your temper seems to have mellowed somewhat…”

“These are all things I have never seen from Your Majesty before.”

Empress Lingshuang listened in silence. Her face betrayed nothing, but the light flickering in her eyes revealed the turmoil within.

“So…”

She spoke slowly, her voice subdued.

“What does that mean?”

Lanling smiled bitterly to herself.

Was Her Majesty asking her for advice?

She was a female general who had lived for nearly twenty thousand years and knew nothing beyond cultivation and war. What could she possibly know about such matters?

But faced with the rare confusion and earnestness in Her Majesty’s eyes, Lanling knew she had to say something.

“I believe…”

Lanling chose her words with care.

“It means… Your Majesty may have developed other feelings for Palace Master Gu.”

“Other feelings?”

Empress Lingshuang repeated the words softly, a complicated light flickering in her eyes.

“What kind of feelings?”

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The question left Lanling at a loss.

“I… do not know.”

Lanling finally answered honestly, a trace of shame crossing her face.

“I have never experienced anything like what Your Majesty is going through, so I truly cannot resolve your confusion.”

Empress Lingshuang fell silent for a moment but did not reproach her.

She had known all along that this would be the answer.

Lanling was the same kind of person she was. It was perfectly natural that neither of them understood such things.

But…

She needed an answer.

“Then how am I to understand it?”

Empress Lingshuang spoke again, her voice carrying an unshakable resolve.

“I need to know exactly what these feelings are and what I should do about them.”

Lanling sank into thought.

Her Majesty was clearly determined to get to the bottom of this.

But if Her Majesty was asking her, who was she supposed to ask?

Wait…

Lanling suddenly thought of Lanxing, whose personality was somewhat livelier than theirs, and her eyes brightened.