They were ninety-nine percent certain that Sharpies were humanoid living organisms. That assessment was one of the tangents that the Defying Physics professor had gone on during class.

Of course, since Sharpies always self-destructed upon defeat, the claim was impossible to verify. A student had even asked the professor for the basis of his judgment.

The man had no factual basis. Instead, he went on a rant about certain alien movies, criticizing the logic of a giant octopus-bug wearing a humanoid mechanical shell. He said dogs had likely eaten the screenwriters’ brains if they couldn’t even grasp the concept of matter determining consciousness.

A student countered that maybe humanoid beings existed on those alien planets, but were the equivalent of dogs there. In response, the professor simply asked the student if they would go through the trouble of crossing the...