Bonus Short Stories

Clotho’s Stroll

Boing, boing.

One of Kelvin’s Followers, Clotho, was out on a carefree “walk” — insofar as slimes can walk — within a marshy area a short distance away from the city of Toraj. Because it could not show itself inside the city due to certain circumstances, Kelvin had, out of consideration, given it permission to wander around areas without much human presence. After contorting its body to express its joy in letters, Clotho had promptly headed off to a place “without much human presence.” Namely, it had chosen this dangerous area where monsters roamed unchecked.

“Grrrr...!”

Of course, strolling through such an area meant encountering other monsters that were similarly wandering around. To avoid drawing unwanted attention even when seen, Clotho was currently adopting the appearance of a common blue slime. This area, however, was the habitat of Rank D and Rank C omnivorous monsters, where survival of the fittest reigned supreme. The small slime looked like nothing more than delicious prey to all that laid eyes on it.

“SHAAHH!”

A huge lizard opened its maw and lunged at Clotho, signaling the start of a life and death fight so common in nature. With a split second left before contact, Clotho faintly remembered something that Kelvin had told it.

“Feel free to do what you like with the monsters you meet. Have as many meals as you want to make up for everything you’re missing out on inside the city.”

Glomp!

The lizard that had jumped into the bottomless pool named Clotho lost its consciousness instantly as its huge form was swallowed up and converted into nourishment. Its opponent, which happened to be the very incarnation of gluttony, reverted to its original size before suddenly recalling something else with a start.

“Oh, and if you find any monster parts that seem useful, can you keep them for me? But I understand if you can’t help yourself.”

Although it had no hands, the slime seemed to be clutching its head in a rare display of consternation. It wasn’t that it couldn’t help itself; it had simply forgotten. That said, moping about what was done wasn’t going to help anybody. The slime decided to simply apologize for its mistake and reflect on its Master’s words so as to properly carry them out next time.

“Shit! Where’d the goddamn lizard go?!”

“And we were so close to finishing this quest!”

All of a sudden, several adventurer-like people approached Clotho’s location while talking loudly. Judging from their conversation, they were searching for the lizard creature that Clotho had just wolfed down.

“Damn. Looks like it got away.”

“Pretty fast legs for such a big gu— hey!”

One of the adventurers and Clotho seemed to make eye contact.

“Guys, there’s a slime with a weird color over here. You think it’s a mutated species?”

“Slimes are all the same, aren’t they? If you want, just kill it quickly and turn it into XP.”

“Speaking of slimes, you guys want to hear something? Did you know there used to be a slime that got as powerful as a Demon Lord...”

“That’s just a legend. C’mon, dude, we don’t have all day.”

“Well, somebody’s in a bad mood. Sorry, little guy. Become my XP!”

With that, one of the adventurers swung his sword at Clotho. The slime thought the attack yawn-inducingly slow, but it still decided to muster all of its mental capacity. What for? To comb through its memories, of course!

“What to do when you encounter humans? Uh...just leave them alone and run away, I guess. Though if that’s not an option, you can teach them a bit of a lesson...”

Mere iron was no match for one of Clotho’s tentacles, sharpened and hardened with the Metallicize skill as they were. Its appendages cut through the adventurer’s sword like a knife through butter, with the shockwave from the impact sending the human himself flying. And, just his luck, he ended up hitting his head upon landing and was out like a light.

“T-Tonio?! Did I just see Tonio fly through the air?!”

“What the hell? What just happened?!”

The ensuing development hardly requires any detailed telling considering how one-sided it was. When the dust settled, all that was left were badly beaten up adventurers lying unconscious on the ground. However, this was where a problem arose. When Clotho carefully thought things over again, it recalled that there had been a little bit more to that last sentence from Kelvin.

“...if they are bad guys.”

Clotho thought long and hard. What constitutes a “bad guy”?

Their eyes met. They drew their swords and attacked. That’s what bad people do!

There was no longer any doubt that these were indeed the very trash of human society. Satisfied with itself, Clotho generated a few clones to secretly carry these unconscious villains to the front door of the Adventurer’s Guild so that they could be arrested.

One good deed for one mistake. It was a pretty good stroll, all in all!

Swimsuit Shopping

Everything had started with an abrupt request from Sera. This was a short while after she had jumped into the middle of an altercation between the Heroes of Deramis and some local hoodlums and delivered her own brand of justice upon the latter. Afterwards, we had resumed our shopping trip, with Gerard having rejoined the group and the Heroes coming along.

“Kelvin, I want a swimsuit!”

“What?” Talk about being sudden. Where’s this coming from?

“What...is a swimsuit? Do you know, Gerard-san?”

“I haven’t the faintest idea either. Sera, lass, what is a swimsuit?”

To my surprise, neither Efil nor Gerard had ever heard of swimsuits before. Although when I thought about it, it made sense. What I should have been more surprised by was hearing the word come from Sera’s mouth.

“I don’t know either! When I was fishing, I heard a girl shouting loudly that her store was selling them. ‘These can only be found in Toraj! How about buying one as a souvenir; this is the best thing for playing in the water!’, supposedly.”

“So you don’t actually know what it is either!”

Then again, I knew about Toraj having swimsuits only because Tsubaki-sama had briefly brought it up during one of our conversations.

“Kelvin-san, you know what swimsuits are?” asked Touya. “This is my first time hearing that this world has them too.”

“As expected of Master.”

Efil directed eyes brimming with admiration towards me. I felt a bit embarrassed, though, as possessing such knowledge didn’t really make me worthy of much respect. Then there were the Heroes, who were surprised by the fact that this world actually had swimsuits.

“Well...since the sea is so close, might as well, I guess. All right, let’s go buy swimsuits.”

“Wait, really?!”

The moment I voiced my consent, Sera leaned over with eyes practically blazing. She’s that happy about it?

“Then can I also pick up that evil-warding sta—”

“I said ‘no’ for that one already!”

And so, the eight of us made our way to a swimsuit store near the seaside. With its stylish-looking design and the signboard outside depicting a cute mermaid, it wasn’t all that hard to find. A quick glance revealed that the inside had ‘Male’ and ‘Female’ sections partitioned off.

“Swimsuit shopping, a ritual of terror...”

“Miyabi-chan, what’s wrong all of a sudden?!”

“Bleagh...”

Fresh blood flew through the air. Not in a figurative way. It actually drew a beautiful arc.

“Kelvin, big trouble! Miyabi’s vomited blood!”

“Uhhh...Sera and Nana, you two should probably leave Miyabi alone for now. You’d probably only deal more mental damage to her at the moment,” I advised.

The two that I had named seemed to not quite understand what I was getting at, but Setsuna, who was clearly used to being the mother of the group, stepped in.

“Miyabi, you...I’m still within your tolerance level, right? I’ll lend you a shoulder.”

Miyabi, hang in there! Live strong!

With that, Touya and I headed off to buy our own gear. Of course, to be honest, nobody cares about guys’ swimsuits. So I figured we would just grab the first items we saw and be done with it.

“Don’t you think this suits you, Kelvin-san? Oh, wait, this might be good too.”

Wait, Touya’s actually doing this seriously? Dude, there’s no demand for guys choosing each others’ swimsuits, all right? That said, it’s too dangerous to let this lucky lecher meet up with Efil and Sera by himself. The safest option is for me to stay with him. Though maybe I could leave him under Gerard’s supervision as well?

“I’m terribly sorry, sir, but our store can’t really allow customers to try on swimsuits over their armor...”

“How can that be?! I have no intention of taking off my armor!”

I don’t know that person. He’s a total stranger. Goddammit, why do I have to deal with these two weirdos even though the girls sound like they’re having so much fun?!

“U-Um, is this not...pretty much underwear?”

“Huh? When Efil-san puts it that way, I can’t help thinking about it the same way...”

“Nana, swimsuits are for showing your true self. Nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“Miyabi-chan, why do you have an enlightened look on your face?”

“Oh, I think I like this one! Looks easy to move in! You want one of these too, Setsuna?”

“A b-bikini? I think it would suit you wonderfully, Sera-san, but for myself...”

“Very well, one for me.”

“Miyabi?!”

“Miyabi-chan?!”

They...are having fun, right? Somehow, I feel like that might not be quite the right word for what’s going on. Given the way things are going, the beach damn well better be worth it. I just need to get through this part, then have all my fun when we’re actually at the sea!

“What about suntan lotion? Give me a large bottle, one that I can put onto every inch of my armor.”

“I-I believe you might be better served going to an armor store...”

It was only after quite a bit more chaos that we finally made our way to the shore.

The Mysterious, Beautiful Angler

“Perfect weather for a day out!”

Blue sky, white clouds, and the Dragon Sea spreading all the way out to the horizon. Wearing her favorite casual outfit and shouldering a fishing rod, Sera visited Toraj Harbour. She had decided that today, her first day off while here in Toraj, was going to be dedicated to fishing. The light outfit was indeed easier to move around in, but her getup was one that would invite ridicule from any local fisherman. It was not an outfit that one would normally associate with fishing, but Sera herself was serious about the task at hand.

Before coming here, she had first gone to purchase her rod. Thankfully, this was a city well known for its fishing industry. As such, there was no shortage of shops selling rods and other relevant gear. After browsing through three or four stores while cheerfully humming to herself, Sera chose a particular rod based on intuition, and paid for it using the pocket money — an amount equal to the reward for a high-ranked quest — that Kelvin had given her.

“Um, miss, this is actually a rod with a rather unique build. It’s not exactly the first one that I would recommend to a lady —”

The rod that Sera had selected turned out to be one that was designed for masters to fish big targets with. It was heavy like lead, and so stiff that it wouldn’t bend in response to anything small being caught on the hook. In fact, this was more of a monster rod that had been heavily modified to meet certain niche hobbyists’ demand for “something to catch monster fish with.” Naturally, this made it a tool that even the large majority of men wouldn’t choose to use, much less a young, slender woman. Because of her outfit, the store clerk had taken Sera for a tourist with no fishing experience and assumed she was merely looking to try it out. His advice had been offered with the best of intentions.

“Sorry, what was that?”

The next thing the clerk knew, however, payment for the rod was lying on the counter, and the woman herself had already skipped halfway to the door with the heavy item in one hand.

“Uh...it was nothing. Thank you for your patronage!”

The clerk decided not to offer further advice.

About thirty minutes after she started fishing, Sera had already seized the attention of everyone nearby. Her peerless beauty was definitely a drawing factor, but what was even more attention-grabbing was the mountain of catches that she was building up. So many energetically flopping fish piled around her made for a very conspicuous sight, to put it mildly.

“Next is...over there!”

“OHHHH!”

When Sera cast her line into the sea, a sharp whoosh roared through the air. This was a phenomenon made possible only due to the speed at which she was wielding her monster rod.

“Hup! Oh, it’s a small one.”

“Wh-Whaaaat...”

Mere seconds later, the red-haired beauty pulled up a fish that any other angler would consider a relatively large catch. Then again, there were several fish longer than a meter in the mountain of sea creatures next to her, so it was rather hard to refute her decision that this catch was a “small” one.

Now, why was Sera — a complete beginner at this — landing such prizes left and right as if she was loved by the gods? Sure, it could just be said that she had a talent for it, but her unnaturally sharp intuition and ability to quickly respond to changes were also significant contributors.

Thanks to the large variety of detection skills that she had mastery over, Sera could accurately tell where her prey was and then cast her line accordingly. There was a secret with the bait that she was using too: she was employing Black Magic to make it move about as if it were actually still alive. The final clincher was this epic rod that would not lose to any opponent and Sera’s own unbelievable strength. Every single onlooker was completely mystified by how she was drawing so much power from those slender arms of hers.

“She must be a once in a dec— no, a once in a century prodigy!”

“You! Go run and inform the Fisherman’s Guild! We can’t let such outstanding talent get away!”

In this way, Sera earned the name of the “mysterious, beautiful angler” among the fishermen of Toraj. Incidentally, the Adventurer’s Guild had immediately moved to block the solicitation from the Fisherman’s Guild, and so the matter never actually reached Sera’s ears.

Tsubaki’s Investigations

Two days had passed since Kelvin and his party began their stay in Toraj. During that time, the monarch of the country, Queen Tsubaki Fujiwara, had been swamped with work. On top of her usual duties, there was the fallout from the Black Wind Incident, the subsequent diplomatic correspondences with the other major powers on the continent, and, well, a few other things.

Perched on her throne, she opened and closed her folding fan repeatedly, clearly deep in thought. She looked so occupied and focused that anyone watching would have been discouraged from engaging her in conversation for fear of interrupting whatever weighty matter it was that she was working through.

Snap!

With a loud sound, Tsubaki closed her folding fan once more, then slowly opened her eyes. In the same motion, she proceeded to put the fan away inside her robes, then clapped twice. As she had ordered all the servants out earlier, the room appeared to be empty. And yet, a man silently came down from behind a ceiling panel and bowed deeply towards the queen. With his black mask and black costume, he looked very much like what Kelvin might have recognized as a “ninja.”

“Here at your service.”

“Kagenui, how goes the investigation? Has there been any progress?”

With his characteristic blank face, the man named Kagenui removed a scroll from beneath his shirt and proffered it to Tsubaki.

“Here is the report.”

“Mm, fast as always. Good work.”

Suddenly in a good mood, the young queen accepted the scroll, undid the string, and unrolled it. What was written inside might have looked like illegible scribbles to some and a unique form of broken-down and disfigured kanji to others, but the queen seemed to have no trouble deciphering the text as her eyes darted over the page.

“Oho, so that’s how it is! As I thought, this Kelvin is no ordinary man. He’s defeated an archdemon and reached Rank A as an adventurer in...isn’t the time listed here a bit too short?”

“It is indeed remarkably short. His real strength, however, is speculated to have already reached Rank S.”

“I see...I see, I see...”

“Tsubaki-sama, you’re drooling.”

“Oh dear, so I am. What a wicked man this Kelvin is to beguile me so.”

Kagenui thought the comment a rather unfair and baseless accusation, but he kept it to himself.

“Who’s this ‘Efil’ mentioned here?”

“She is an elven slave who serves Kelvin-dono as a maid. She is commonly seen wearing a maid outfit of a foreign design.”

“Ah, the blond one. She...what’s this? ‘Possesses cooking skills so incredible that all who eat her food are brought to tears’? Is this true?!”

“It is true.”

Possibly due to the blood of the gourmet-loving Japanese flowing in her veins, Tsubaki’s reaction to this entry in the report was quite exaggerated indeed. Before she knew it, she was on her feet, fists clenched, her Tsubaki Sensor fully activated. And she was drooling yet again.

“I want her...I really, really want her!”

“Then I believe you will be glad to receive this as well. It is a request from Kelvin-dono himself.”

“What’s this? Let me see...he’s requesting permission for his companion to learn from the chefs in our castle?!”

“That is the case, yes.”

“Granted! Tell the head chef to do the teaching himself! Hurry! That way, I can solicit them in person!”

“As you command. About the next person —”

“What? There are more individuals worthy of attention?”

Tsubaki’s eyes returned to the report.

“It is Sera, the red-haired woman.”

“Mm, I remember her. Both women that accompanied Kelvin for the audience were of great beauty. So then, noteworthy points...fishing? Why is ‘fishing’ on this list?”

“She is no mere angler. From what I gather, on her very first day fishing, she pulled the same sort of catch that a fishing boat could. She even caught a naatu of significant size.”

“A big naatu?!”

“In addition, this Sera’s skill as an angler is improving. The local fishermen are saying that she just might go down in history by landing a legendary fish more delicious than any other in existence.”

“She’s hired! Hired on the spot! Don’t let her get away!”

“As you command. About the next per—”

“There’s more?! Y-You know what, let’s take a small break. I’m not sure I can take all this in one sitting.”

Tsubaki took a sip of green tea to wet her throat. The work that she had scheduled for the rest of the day had already completely left her mind, with almost all of her mental focus now directed towards planning how to solicit each and every one of these talented individuals. However, this was not a problem, as she still managed to get through her usual tasks at double the speed. All of the extra free time was then devoted to her solicitation efforts.

Top Maid in the Kitchen

What had started it all was the request made by Kelvin on Efil’s behalf. Namely, she wanted to add Torajian cuisine to her repertoire. Considering how similar the local cuisine was to the Japanese cuisine that he knew and loved, Kelvin practically threw his hands up in a display of delight. And if he was to find her a place to learn it, then where better than the kitchen of the royal castle itself? So he promptly sent the request, which was approved in almost no time.

“Efil, Tsubaki-sama’s given her approval. Go absorb everything you can.”

“Thank you very much for your help, Master! I promise to pay it back in full!”

Deeply grateful to her master for having arranged such an excellent learning environment, Efil fired herself up even more in hopes of repaying this favor to him someday. And soon enough, this paragon of a maid found herself standing within the kitchen of Toraj Castle.

“My name is Efil. It is an incredible honor to be here. Please take care of me today onwards.”

Efil lowered her head gracefully. Surrounding her were the highest-caliber chefs in Toraj, all looking at her with sharp, measuring gazes. And well they should, for every single person there had been acknowledged by Tsubaki herself. All of them took great pride in their status as royal chefs and spent each day in a fierce but friendly rivalry with each other, constantly aiming to overcome their own limitations in skill and creativity.

Naturally, the intrusion of an outsider in such a place drew stern looks. Indeed, Efil was currently being tested by them!

S-She’s so cute...

You kidding me?! She’s an elf and she’s a maid?! She’s an elven maid!!

An angel has finally descended into this sausagefest of a workplace!

Or not. Belying their sharp stares, the chefs were all inwardly dancing jigs of joy.

“Hmph! I can only imagine what must have come over Tsubaki-sama to allow a brat into our kitchen.”

“H-Head Chef, you can’t say that!”

There was, however, one person who was not swayed by Efil’s presence. It was the head chef, the man who held the highest authority in the kitchen. Known as the most stubborn man in all of Toraj, he would acknowledge only those who could impress him with their cooking, trusting only in his own taste buds.

“No matter. Girl, make something, anything. Then I’ll decide whether you’re truly worthy of being here.”

“As you wish. Please give me some time.”

With a practiced hand, Efil started cooking. As expected of the kitchen of a royal castle, it was fully equipped with every manner of ingredient and industry tool. The chefs focused on what Efil was making...

Head Chef, if Efil-chan leaves because of you, I’ll hold a grudge against you for the rest of my life!

...All while nursing a certain seed of hostility towards their superior. Oblivious to all of this, Efil proceeded with her task, finishing up before long.

“Thank you for waiting. I am done.”

“You...this is...”

“Yes, it is a rolled omelette.”

The smile on Efil’s face was enough to steal almost any man’s heart. As for her dish...without the garnish, it was nothing more than a simple rolled omelette.

Interesting choice. The rolled omelette is basic, yes, but it is precisely because of its simplicity that there is much to it. The fact that she chose to make this means that she’s either just that confident in her skills or that she’s a complete novice. Tsubaki-sama, depending on how this turns out, you just might be seeing me walk out the door.

The head chef used a pair of chopsticks to cut off a slice and brought it to his mouth. He chewed slowly, taking the time to savor the entire piece. There was a long, uncomfortable silence.

“Head Chef, how is it?”

The tension rose as they anxiously awaited a reply.

“Head Chef?”

Every single person was holding their breath in anticipation of the old man’s verdict. However, there was no ruling no matter how long they waited. As some of the men began to worry that the dish had been bad enough to sour their head chef’s mood, the older man suddenly clapped a hand over his eyes and tears began spilling down his face.

“So this...is what heaven tastes like. This omelette melts on the tongue like a cloud, and yet every time I chew, a concentrated burst of flavor spreads throughout my entire mouth. The innate richness of the ingredients are brought out to the full — no, have been raised to even greater heights —”

On and on he went. With a wide variety of words and expressions, he heaped endless praise on the dish.

“H-He’s started! Head Chef has started his famous ‘monologuing’! And he’s still going on!!”

“That’s not all! Look at that waterfall of tears! He’s even entered his ‘crying’ state! Just how delicious is this rolled omelette?!”

The surrounding chefs, who had been reduced to a mere gallery at this point, loudly and excitedly discussed the glowing review of Efil’s cooking, growing increasingly worked up with every passing moment. Efil quietly slipped out of the uproarious kitchen, then turned to look up at the sky.

Master, I’ll do my best!

The very next day, Efil’s position in the hierarchy of the kitchen had already been flipped, with her offering the other chefs instruction. Even so, she continued to work hard, pouring herself into both learning and teaching.