Side Story: The Other Beast King Festival
Side Story: The Other Beast King Festival
The Gaunian Gourmet Guide
As I am sure most of our readers already know, the entire country of Gaun mobilizes each year to host the extravaganza known as the Beast King Festival. Swordsmen representing their dojos, warriors hoping for a ticket to fame, adventurers joining for various reasons, members of royalty seeking to take on their family’s name, and powerful figures from all over the world gather and clash with each other on the stage of the Gaun Mixed Fighting Arena, putting all their pride and strength on display.
However, in the shadow of this tournament, there is another Beast King Festival. Have you heard of it? To start with, are you wondering why this food gourmet magazine is bringing up the Beast King Festival? That is a valid question. Of course, we have a reason for doing so. This other Beast King Festival is by no means a competition of martial abilities. However, it is in no way any less fierce than the Beast King Festival that everyone knows.
I’m sure the more astute reader has already predicted where we’re going with this. That’s right. Allow us to introduce you to this astounding spectacle within the gourmet world...
“Th-This is...”
The day after arriving in Gaun, Melfina was up bright and early—a very rare occurrence for her—and staring at an issue of her favorite gourmet guide series in shock.
“The date... It’s today?! Th-This has to be fate! Honey, HONEY! This is no time to be sleeping!”
Melfina vigorously shook Kelvin, who was still asleep next to her, while somewhat enjoying being on the other side of this dynamic for once. Kelvin, however, clearly did not share her sentiment, judging from the groans he let out with every shake.
Last night, Kelvin had found himself faced with the monumental task of bringing a thoroughly sloshed Sera back to the inn. On top of having his arms snapped and healed multiple times in the process, his neck had also been attacked several times, forcing him to fend for his life long enough for his companions to notice and come to his rescue. Naturally, by the time he got back, he was dead tired. Just absolutely spent.
Melfina had then taken advantage of the situation to convince Rion and Efil, whose turn it was to sleep with Kelvin, to give her the night with him in exchange for the following night, which was her originally scheduled turn. Naturally, Efil, who prided herself on being Kelvin’s dedicated caretaker, protested fiercely, but Melfina forced her to back down by mentioning her White Magic, with which she was capable of healing injuries of even the greatest severity in a split second.
What an incredible goddess she was. What a cheap goddess she was. In the end, however, Melfina fell asleep being just as active as she always was, meaning Kelvin did not exactly get the rest that he needed that night.
“Nn...”
“Good morning! Honey, it’s morning! It’s the time of the day when all living beings should wake up!”
“I can hear you, so stop shouting in my ear,” Kelvin mumbled as he sat up. He yawned and stretched both arms high, still subject to the goddess’s high-speed shaking all the while. “Hm? It’s still early. Hold on, I think this is the first time I’ve ever been woken up by you. I’ll really treasure this experience. So can you please stop shaking me? You’re going to ruin the moment.”
“Oh, sorry.”
After finally being released, Kelvin suppressed the wave of nausea that bubbled up from within. Mel’s stats were so high that when she shook Kelvin with all she had, even this Grim Reaper, the Rank S adventurer who was now the hottest topic in the world, had to beg for mercy.
“So, what’s going on? I’m actually still kind of tired from what happened yesterday.”
“But I’ve already healed you from head to toe.”
“I meant that I’m mentally tired.”
“Don’t worry. After sleeping next to me for a night, your mental state has also been fully—”
“I’m mentally tired.”
An awkward silence filled the air. Regardless of Melfina’s claim, she had indeed been very active in her sleep last night. But that was enough of that conversation. The two shifted to the main topic.
“Honey, look at this article in my favorite gourmet guide.”
“Gourmet guide? Uh, what’s it say? Extravaganza... Another Beast King Festival... Introduce... So, what exactly is this, Mel?”
“It’s talking about the annual eating competition that Gaun is also famous for! And it’s starting at noon today! This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity! We can’t let it slip through our fingers, honey!”
“So, this is, like...a part of the festivities leading up to the main event?”
“How can you say that?! For me, this is the main event!”
“I...see. Well, I suppose it’s good to be enthusiastic about something...”
Although slightly creeped out by how gung ho Mel was about it, Kelvin was willing to give the article a closer look as he wanted to support the things his companions were interested in. But when his gaze ran down the page, something caught his attention.
“Hold on, Mel. What sort of competition did you say it was again?”
“The epitome of eternal justice, an eating competition.”
“Uh...I’m really sorry to rain on your parade, but can you read what it says here?” Kelvin pointed to the part of the text that detailed the name of the competition.
“Hm? I don’t understand what you’re getting at, but okay. Let me s— Huh?! Drinking?!”
“Looks like it. It’s not an eating competition but a drinking one. Ha ha, looks like you got ahead of yourself.”
Melfina yanked the magazine back and scanned the article again, desperately praying that Kelvin’s merciless pronouncement was a simple mistake. However, there it was in black and white: “Beast King Drinking Festival.” No matter how many times she read and reread the words, they didn’t change. The goddess crumpled to the ground in despair.
“I’m sorry, especially since you got your hopes up. But this trip has only just started. Let’s grab breakfast downstairs and change gea—”
“I’ll do it.”
“Sorry, do what?”
“I’m still joining this competition. Now that I’ve gotten so fired up, I can’t be appeased with food that isn’t made by Efil. At this point, I’m fine with it being wine too! It goes into my stomach all the same!”
“Seriously?” Kelvin made a face, feeling like he had just been dragged into something troublesome.
◇ ◇ ◇
“Oh? You are entering too, Princess? What a coincidence! So am I!”
“Mel-sama’s joining? Me too! I wanna join too!”
“Ruka-chan, we’re not allowed to drink wine yet.”
“Like Ruka-chan and Shutola-chan, I’m underage, so...”
When Kelvin and Melfina headed down to the inn’s dining area, they found Gerard, Ruka, Shutola, and Rion already at a table. They appeared to have finished eating and were enjoying cups of Gaunian tea.
“You’re entering, Gerard? Looks like a worthy rival has shown up!”
“You took the words right out of my mouth, Princess. That said, an eating competition would be one thing, but I’m confident I won’t lose to anyone in a drinking competition.”
Sparks flew between the goddess and knight. Kelvin was astounded to see Mel being so energetic this early in the morning. For him, this was turning out to be a day of surprises.
“Funny enough, it seems like those not participating in the tournament are more interested in the competition,” he chuckled. “So, where are Sera and Efil?”
“Sera-nee is... Well, you can imagine.”
“Ah, she’s hungover?”
In sharp contrast to her domineering manner from last night, Sera had no choice but to take things easy today. She was most likely thrashing with agony in her bed at this very moment and wouldn’t be able to get up before noon.
“Aha ha, pretty much. And Efil-nee is checking out the morning market. She said she’s looking for ingredients that would go into a dish effective for hangovers. Ellie went with her as a learning experience.”
“Diligent as ever. I should probably pay Sera a visit later on,” Kelvin commented before spotting a waitress. “Hi, excuse me! Can I have the menu, please?”
When he was done ordering, Mel raised a hand. “I’m ordering too. The competition is in the afternoon, so I’ll control myself. Please give me everything from here...to here. Three of each.”
“I’m sorry? You mean all of these...and three of each?!”
The beastkin waitress was so surprised by the order that she couldn’t help but repeat it out loud. Meals in Gaun were large, and a girl with Mel’s build normally wouldn’t be able to finish even one. However, the goddess nodded and stressed once again that she wanted three portions of each. The waitress looked at Kelvin, who was sitting next to her, for confirmation.
“Come on, don’t do that, Mel.”
Before the waitress could open her mouth to ask, however, Kelvin was already chiding Melfina. The server heaved a small sigh of relief at the confirmation that the order had indeed been mistaken.
“I-I’m sorry, dear customers, I must have misunderstood. Each meal is quite sizab—”
“You know that you shouldn’t drink on an empty stomach, right? If you don’t eat enough, it’s gonna be tough on you.”
“Huh?!” The waitress froze.
“You know, big sister, if you suddenly change how you do things, you won’t be able to perform the same as usual. Holding back is not good for you.”
“I agree with Shutola-chan! We can’t bear to see you not eating when you’re so hungry, Mel-nee!”
“Heh. Princess, my king and grandchildren have all spoken their piece. Given how kind you are, you now have no choice but to live up to their expectations.”
“Mel, if it’s the money you’re worried about, don’t be. Rion and I have a shot at the reward money that comes with the championship from the Beast King Festival. We’re on a trip, and a trip is where you’re free of everything. Don’t be reserved. Eat as much as you want!”
“Honey! Everyone! Very well. Your words have reached me. I shall indeed eat as much as I always do for breakfast. Waitress! Please show me the menu again!”
“Y-Yes, ma’am!”
Melfina’s finger slid from one edge of the menu to the other, leaving the waitress scribbling everything furiously in a desperate effort to keep up. It was a rather unfortunate occurrence for the chefs at this inn, but there was no telling what trouble Melfina would cause if she were to bring the full force of her appetite to the competition at noon. Although it pained him greatly, Kelvin had made the tough decision to sacrifice the inn’s chefs instead.
“Ah, I’ve heard that dairy products are good for offsetting alcohol. I should take that approach as well. Waitress, give me a barrel of milk and several wheels of cheese.”
“The whole barrel?!”
If anyone thought Kelvin was enjoying himself as he looked on, they would be mistaken. There was, in fact, a completely different thought currently going through his mind.
Why do I feel a sense of déjà vu from this sequence of events?
◇ ◇ ◇
Just before noon, Kelvin and his companions made their way over to the largest plaza in the city, the venue for the Beast King Drinking Festival. Sadly, Sera had not managed to get up in time, and Efil had stayed behind to nurse her. Dahak had gone off somewhere on his own. Everyone else was present.
The plaza was filled with just as many stalls as the large avenues were, causing the savory aroma of meat on the grill to waft through the air. In the end, even after breakfast, Melfina had ended up buying food from the stalls she passed and eating them on the way. At the moment, she was holding two towering skewers of meat aloft. After a short incomprehensible sentence that sounded like, “I knew it; meat really is absolute justice!” Mel erased the skewers from existence in a split second and directed her passionate gaze to the food on display at a nearby stall.
“Oh, I hear your voices all right. Don’t worry, I’ll eat you next!”
The stall owner’s eyes flew wide open in terror as he broke into a cold sweat. By now, Melfina had already eaten several stalls out of their entire stock.
“H-Hey, dude, isn’t that The Smile over there?”
“Huh? Hot damn, it really is!”
“Did you hear? The Smile is going to join the Beast King Drinking Festival.”
“I see, The Smile is— Wait, you’re not pulling my leg?!”
“No, man, I hear she’s crushed several stalls while making her way here. We hafta brace ourselves. It’s a hurricane this year!”
“Did you make sure to stock up on enough ingredients?! The Smile is coming!”
When Kelvin perked up his ears, a ton of unnecessary information came flooding in. Ever since he had Evolved into a daemon, he had been mentally prostrating himself in apology left and right whenever he overheard similar conversations. Even he had not imagined how far Mel would take things. He was starting to regret telling her not to hold back and to be free with her eating.
“Mel and Gerard, isn’t it about time you headed to reception? We finished the registration just now, but I imagine contestants will have to enter the venue a bit earlier.”
“Mm? Is it already that time?”
“Om nom nom...gulp. Wonderful! I am in perfect shape and feeling just the right degree of peckishness! Let’s go, Gerard!”
“Indeed. My king, I shall be counting on your support. And Rion and Ruka, make sure to take a good look at your grandpa’s gallant figure on stage!”
Mel and Gerard started making their way to the competition area. The old knight’s three grandchildren, however, had clouded expressions on their faces.
“Trying your best is good and all, Gramps, but don’t overdrink, okay? The one thing that scares me most is those around me falling sick.”
“Wine...scares me a little. Getting drunk...sounds scary too...”
“Grandpa Gerard, my mommy said that a little bit of wine is good for you, but if you drink too much, it becomes poisonous!”
“My king, I will swear off alcohol for the rest of my life. Will you participate in the competition in my stead?”
“You were looking forward to this, right? You can joke around when we get back. For now, off you go already. Shoo, shoo.”
Kelvin pushed Gerard’s back and saw him off.
“Kel-nii, who do you think will win?”
“Hm? We don’t know who else will be participating. Isn’t it a bit early to make predictions?”
“Is it? I can’t imagine anyone being able to beat Mel-nee or Gramps, though. Especially when it comes to eating and drinking.”
“You do have a point...”
Kelvin had met a large number of strange and bizarre characters to date, but none had been even close to being able to eat as much as Melfina or drink as much as Gerard. The only one who gave Mel a run for her money was “Ice Princess” Sylvia, the person who had been promoted to the level of Rank S adventurer just before him.
“Yeah, no, I don’t think even Sylvia can beat her. She doesn’t have a black hole in her stomach, after all.” But the focus of this competition is wine. In light of that, Gerard just might have a chance at victory. “Mel enjoys a drink every now and then, but her strength really lies in eating. I guess Gerard would be the favorite?”
“But we did just warn grandpa. Right, Ruka-chan?”
“Sure we did, Shutola-chan!”
“I guess it’s not so clear-cut...”
Shutola and Ruka exchanged a cute high five. It wasn’t clear if their words were out of concern for the old knight’s health, but it had made it much more difficult to predict the winner of the competition. Kelvin purposely did not ask, “So, it’s okay for Mel to drink?” Mel eats and drinks, therefore she is.
“By the way, who do you guys think will win?”
“I’m thinking Mel-nee. Because we know we can count on her to be the Mel-nee we know.”
“I’m thinking Grandpa Gerard! He promised, but I think he’ll still do his best!”
“I’m thinking it won’t be either of them.”
While Rion predicted Melfina and Ruka Gerard, Shutola had other ideas.
“Seriously?” Kelvin asked, surprised. “Who, then?”
“Heh heh, it’s a surprise!”
“Shutola-chan, that’s not fair!”
But Shutola just smiled knowingly and refused to say who she was expecting. As their conversation continued in the stands, the competition began.
“Come one, come all! Ladies and gentlemen, this celebration of those of us who indulge in the ambrosia known as wine is finally upon us! The name of the event is, of course, the Beast King Drinking Festival! If you think this is just another opening act to the real Beast King Festival, be prepared to get burned, as this is one competition that burns white-hot! Dear me, I forgot to introduce myself. I am Ronove, an announcer from the Gaun Mixed Fighting Arena. I’m honored to be commentating for you today!”
“Oh hey, this competition even has a commentator? Nice. Really gives it an official vibe.”
“Apparently, this competition is purposely done in a flashy way so that it lives up to its name as the ‘Shadow Beast King Festival.’ At least, that’s what it says here in Mel-nee’s gourmet guide,” Rion noted while flipping through the book that Mel had entrusted her with. “Oh, look, the contestants are going to be introduced soon.”
“I’ve been thinking it for a while now, but does this actually count as gourmet? The average person would hardly participate.”
“Maybe in a more general sense?”
At the very least, Mel considered it gourmet.
“Allow me to introduce the heroes who will be participating in this competition! Contestants, please show us how enthusiastic you are with a brief intro after I mention your name! First up, a steadfast shield of his king, the old knight with a history completely shrouded in mystery and member of Rank S adventurer ‘Grim Reaper’ Kelvin’s party, Gerard-samaaaa! His cute, cute grandchildren are watching him today, so he is more than ready to wow them with what he can do! What do you have to say, Gerard-sama?!”
“I am taking this opportunity to announce that I will be setting a teetotal day each week.”
“Did you really have to say that now?!”
Ronove’s straight man act was sharp and snappy. From her mannerisms and choice of words, Kelvin could tell that she was used to doing this.
In other words, she must have at least one person in her life who is constantly doing and saying things so nonsensical that she just has to point them out. That’s the only way she could be so good at it!
And, well, Kelvin was basically enjoying the event too, albeit in his own way.
“Looks like this other Beast King Festival has kicked off with a completely unexpected declaration from a contestant! This is why I can’t stop being an announcer! The next contestant is our very own prince, the one who has just gotten back from a journey of self-improvement! He claims that his ability to drink has improved significantly from trying all the different drinks in the many countries he’s visited! This is the Rank A adventurer who is hoping to receive the Beast King’s family name this year, Sabato-sama! Sabato-sama, is your duo partner Goma-sama not with you today?”
“My du— Are you suggesting we’re a comedy duo?!”
“Oh dear, we’re running short on time. Let’s introduce the next contestant!”
Ronove’s funny man act was completely natural. As it turned out, she was quite multitalented, being masterful at playing both sides of a duo act.
Kelvin found himself sighing in appreciation. Is Sabato’s generosity in allowing himself to be the butt of a joke part of the national character of Gaun?
“Our third contestant is Gaun’s foremost hundred-man commander, Guin-sama! Oh, are you here to protect Prince Sabato today?”
“Nope, I came ’cause I heard there’s free wine! I only bumped into Sabato-sama just now!”
“And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen, it looks like Guin-sama is skipping work to be here! Someone send word to Princess Goma that one of her subordinates is abandoning his duties!”
“Wait, what?!”
However, there was a limit to the magnanimous national character of Gaun, and those who needed to be penalized would be properly penalized. Buff soldiers seemed to appear out of nowhere and dragged Guin off to who-knows-where.
“What quick action we are seeing today! Looks like we have our first contestant dropping out! Moving on, our fourth contestant is that legendary figure who defeated His Majesty in a brilliant display to take home the trophy at last year’s main Beast King Festival: Rank S adventurer ‘Peach Ogre’ Goldiana Prettiana, whose, uh, androgynous appearance makes him a hit among the female audience but strangely unpopular with the men! Gosh, I wonder why that is!”
Both Kelvin’s and Gerard’s minds froze. Then they erased their memories and told themselves they had seen nothing.
“Oh, it’s Prettia-chan!”
In contrast, the three girls in Kelvin’s group all waved their hands cheerfully in greeting.
“I’ll be giving all you cuties a wonderful dream tonight!” Goldiana giggled before sending a huge wink that knocked out every last man in the audience. Many collapsed clutching their chests.
“Goldiana-sama’s act of fan service appears to have struck many of the male audience members right in the heart! I stand corrected—he clearly commands unparalleled popularity with the guys too!”
She’s responding to what Goldiana did by playing the funny man as if she’s the straight man?! Boy, she’s really good! Kelvin shuddered at Ronove’s overwhelming talent as a commentator.
“By the way, Goldiana-sama, may I ask why you decided to participate this year even though you showed no interest last year?”
“Because I heard Gerard-sama is appearing!”
Even though he had yet to drink a single drop, Gerard already felt sick.
“Ohhh! So you two are in a rivalrous relationship! We’re definitely curious to see how it plays out! Now, there are two remaining contestants! Let’s ride this momentum and introduce them both! The first is another member of Kelvin-sama’s party! She is already well-known within the industry as ‘The Smile,’ the stunning beauty who plunges restaurateurs into both terror and delight, Mel-sama! It remains to be seen if her seemingly bottomless stomach for food can hold just as much wine. Mel-sama, a word please?”
“You’ll provide snacks too, right?”
“I’m sorry?”
“This is wine, so there’ll be snacks to go with the wine, right? I can’t draw out my full potential without the snacks. I’m not unreasonable enough to quibble over the quality, but if you can prepare a huge quantity of snacks, I would be very grateful.”
“I mean, we can, but... Ahem. It looks like Mel-sama will be both eating and drinking for this competition. Come to think of it, it is said that snacks make wine taste better. In other words, she plans to fully enjoy every last drop as she drinks her way to first place! What a wonderful attitude!”
Uh, no, she’s just trying to make up for this not being an eating competition, Kelvin thought, facepalming. Then he looked around curiously. “I don’t see the last contestant. Is he late?”
All of the contestants who had been introduced so far were sitting in their assigned seats. However, there was one seat next to Melfina that was still empty.
Shutola shook her head. “That’s not it. Everyone, look over there!”
“Huh?”
Kelvin and his companions turned to look in the indicated direction, but all they saw were the same crowds. Just as they were about to turn back and ask Shutola for clarification, Ronove’s voice rang out.
“It is finally time to introduce—no, welcome our final contestant!”
In response to Ronove’s declaration, rousing music sprang up and the crowds receded so swiftly it was as if they had practiced it beforehand. Before long, a clear, orderly path had appeared. And standing right in the middle of that path...
“The champion of last year’s Beast King Drinking Festival has once again made the journey all the way from the Village of Elves! The champion of champions with an illustrious record, said to have obtained runner-up position in the Western Continent Drinking Competition from the day he took his first drink as a youth! The king of kings within the world of veteran drinkers! Everyone, put your hands together for...Elder of the Village of Elves, Nellas-samaaaa!”
Cheers and applause thundered, rocking the venue. The elven Elder proceeded down the path that had been opened up for him, reminiscent of a pro wrestler’s entrance or the arrival of a hero.
Bewilderment filled Kelvin’s face. “Uh...that’s the Elder from the Village of Elves, right? What’s he doing here? He drinks?”
“He seems really popular,” Rion commented.
The screams of support from the audience filled the air as Nellas made his way to his assigned seat. Before sitting down, he turned around and gave a huge wave in response to the cheering. There was no need to even ask who the crowd favorite was.
“Champion Nellas! May we have a word from you, please?”
“It appears my competition today is significantly stiffer than it has been in previous years. Even so, I have absolutely no intention of yielding my crown. I shall be victorious no matter what wine is served today!”
“What a confident declaration indeed!”
Clapping, cheering, and whistling roared up once again.
“The person I think will win is Grandpa Nellas, an elven Elder! Based on the data from previous years, he has the highest chance of winning by far!”
“So he’s your favorite, huh, Shutola? Well, he does look young.”
“I don’t like how you worded that, dear brother!”
Leaving aside the question of where Shutola had gotten access to such records, all the participants for the event were now gathered: Gerard, who looked deflated from being told not to drink too much by his grandchildren; Sabato, whom no one really expected to win; Guin, who had already dropped out; Goldiana, who was there more for Gerard than the prize; Melfina, who was waiting in anticipation of the snacks that would be served; and lastly, Nellas, last year’s champion. It was quite the lineup.
“Ladies and gentlemen, here are all the leading actors of today’s festivity. Give a hand to these five brave competitors!”
CLAP! CLAP! CLAP!
“I’m not surprised, but Guin sure left the picture quickly.”
“Skipping work is bad! Mommy always scolds Huba for it!”
“Huba...skips work?”
The unexpected fact that he had a servant slacking off on the job left Kelvin reeling a little as he went through the motions of joining the storm of clapping going on. The applause was filled with enthusiasm and took a while to subside, showing just how much expectation was in the air.
“Thank you! Thank you! Now that we’re all fired up, let’s move on to explaining the rules! The drink this year is the famous label that represents our country, Juuoushu! Yes, that distinctive drink that is so powerful, it is easily classified as firewater! The one who drinks the most within the allotted time will be the winner! The winner will earn the title of champion, a year’s supply of Juuoushu, and the coveted glass tankard said to once belong to Bakke-sama, the first ever winner of this long-lasting and illustrious competition!”
The beastkin grew even more impassioned after hearing about the generous prizes. In contrast, Kelvin found himself at a loss, not quite understanding the value of what was being promised.
“Who’s Bakke?”
“If I remember correctly, she’s the queen consort of a country on the Western Continent. She happened to take part in this event during her adventuring days,” Shutola replied.
“God, why are royals in this world all such weirdos? So, I guess this glass tankard is valuable because it was once used by someone famous? That it?”
Rion shrugged. “I guess it’s the kind of thing that’s only valuable to people who know how to appreciate it. Oh my god, look at that! That’s crazy!”
Following Rion’s excited gestures, Kelvin turned to see staff carrying in the wine that was to be consumed and the containers the contestants were supposed to drink from. The latter was what had grabbed Rion’s attention, as they were practically barrels. As these empty containers that could fit an entire adult were steadily filled with Juuoushu, the powerful stench of alcohol wafted all the way to the stands. Kelvin made the split-second decision to deploy a White Magic barrier around his group’s seats, which completely purified the fumes. Then he wholeheartedly thanked Melfina the Goddess in his heart for Sera not being here. If she had come along, this whole venue would have been covered with blood. Mainly his, that was.
“Has everyone received their tankards? These gigantic handmade tankards were specially ordered by the competition organizers just for today! The aromatic woody fragrance is the absolute perfect match for Juuoushu! Contestants, do you feel your saliva flowing already?!”
The huge tankards now heavy with wine were plunked down in front of each contestant in turn. The crowd got even more riled up, no one seeming bothered by the ridiculous quantities.
Kelvin murmured, “We’re used to it from seeing Mel eat, but how are these guys not shaken by that? That’s just... Wow.”
“Aha ha, Kel-nii, I think Sabato-san’s freaking out a little.”
“You’re right, Rion-chan! He’s sweating buckets!”
“My predictions tell me the chances of Prince Sabato winning are as slim as those of big sister Mel going on a fast.”
At times, children say the most hurtful things. They have no qualms about directly pointing out stuff that everyone else is pretending not to see.
“The amount of Juuoushu in each barrel is the same! The weight of each barrel is also the same! When the time comes, we’ll weigh each barrel to see how much is remaining in each. Contestants, do your best to finish them off! Any questions? No ques—”
“Excuse me.” Melfina raised her hand, her face the very picture of seriousness.
“Yes? What is the matter?”
“My snacks aren’t here yet. I requested an amount proportionate to the wine.”
“Huh? Oh, I’m sorry.”
Ronove asked the servers to arrange the snacks. A short while later, a huge plate piled with a mountain of cheeses and smoked fish was carried out. While the other contestants each had a huge barrel sitting before them, Mel now had a massive pile of snacks as well, leaving her hidden from sight. Her voice, however, was still audible.
“Heh heh, now things have gotten interesting. This is truly a mountain worth conquering!”
Kelvin brought a hand to his forehead. “By ‘mountain,’ she’s probably referring to...”
“The snacks!” Ruka and Shutola replied in unison as Rion chuckled wryly.
“Of course she is,” Kelvin said, heaving a sigh.
Once again, the air of the venue was charged with tension. Many of the contestants peered into their containers, raring to go. When the suspense reached its peak, Ronove raised a hand.
“Everyone, are you ready?! It’s now time to drink as much Juuoushu as you can! Without further ado, the Beast King Drinking Festival starts...NOW!”
The instant Ronove gave the signal, Gerard, Sabato, and Melfina lifted their giant tankards by the handles and started pouring the contents down their throats. The weight of the barrels made the very act of drinking a challenge in and of itself, one which these three managed handily. Their barrels steadily tilted at a good pace, indicating how quickly they were drinking the contents.
“Ohhh! The competition starts off on fire right out of the gate! Everyone has managed to lift their— No! Goldiana-sama and Nellas-sama have shown no movement! Whatever could be the problem?!”
In sharp contrast to the burst of activity shown by the other three, Goldiana and Nellas had yet to even reach for their barrels. Everyone looked on as Goldiana moved first. He put a hand down the front of his outfit.
“L-Ladies and gentlemen, Goldiana-sama has taken out a large teacup! And he’s... Look at that! He’s scooping the wine from the barrel with it! And...he’s drinking it with elegant motions!”
“Is she going to describe everything that’s going on?” Kelvin retorted to no one in particular.
The person who presumably had the highest Strength stat among all the contestants was, of all things, scooping out the alcohol and drinking it gracefully instead of lifting the whole container. This was, naturally, extremely inefficient and put his pace far behind those of the three who were drinking directly from the barrel.
“Um, Goldiana-sama? Would it not be better to lift the tankard like the others are doing?”
“Oh no, dearie, that’s entirely out of the question. As a lady, I simply couldn’t act so coarsely in front of so many eyes. Especially not when Gerard-sama’s watching!” Goldiana replied, blushing furiously.
“Pffpaah! Cough, cough!” Gerard, who had been in the lead, suddenly choked heavily. The attack had taken him entirely by surprise and dealt a significant amount of damage.
“For some reason, Gerard-sama has started coughing violently! Could this be his old age acting up?!”
“Th-That caught me off guard!”
“He’s lost almost twenty seconds! This is a great loss! Can he really recover from this?! Wait, Nellas-sama...”
While everyone’s attention had been directed towards Goldiana and Gerard, Nellas had started moving. Past champion or not, he was an elf, and elves did not have very high Strength in general. Lifting the entire barrel of wine was beyond him, so he adopted a unique strategy.
“A-Are you seeing what I’m seeing?! Nellas-sama has plunged his head inside his barrel!”
If he couldn’t move the barrel, he simply had to dive in himself. While a lesser man might have wanted to be hidden when doing this, Nellas had not hesitated in the slightest. Although those right in front could not see what was happening inside that barrel, the sound of his drinking was certainly audible. What’s more, his body was slipping further and further into the barrel, indicating the rate at which the level of wine inside was lowering.
“What an incredible display! Methods aside, Nellas-sama is going through his barrel so fast, he just might catch up to Mel-sama and Sabato-sama, the two currently in the lead! There is truly no telling how this competition will turn out!”
“Phew. I wouldn’t be so sure about that.”
“Huh?! M-Mel-sama has lowered her barrel! Don’t tell me...”
“Give me a second barrel please!”
“SHE’S FINISHED IT!!!”
Indeed, Mel had completely emptied her tankard.
“I can’t believe this! Mel-sama actually finished all that Juuoushu! Staff, bring another one over! Quickly!”
“Oh, and bring me seconds of the snacks too!”
“WHAT?!”
What had previously hidden Melfina’s entire figure had been reduced to an empty barrel and clean plate. Not only had Melfina finished her wine, she had also devoured every last morsel of the food before her.
“When did you finish eating?! Staff, bring more snacks too! On the double!”
At that moment, Nellas’s face popped back up from inside his barrel, and he raised his hand. “May I have another as well?”
“Pfah! Have I caught back up?” Gerard asked almost at the same time, also raising his hand.
The two turned to glare at each other, sparks flying in between despite sitting on opposite ends of the table.
“Gerard-san, I did think you a rather hearty drinker during the feast at our village, but never did I imagine you capable of keeping up with me. You sure do make this fun!”
“You took the words right out of my mouth. I had never imagined I would meet anyone other than Princess who could match my pace.”
“Ladies and gentlemen, the sparks are flying, and the heat is turning up! The competition this year is truly on fire! Oh? Right underneath the sparks, Sabato-sama does not seem to be moving. Has he been knocked out by the overwhelming pressure being exerted on all sides?”
Silence greeted the commentator.
“No response?! Medics, check up on him now!”
Several beastkin rushed towards Sabato, who had stopped moving while hugging his barrel. They lowered the barrel and looked into his face, then shook their heads.
“The whites of his eyes are showing. He’s unconscious!”
“S-Sabato-sama has departed! He has departed without any of us realizing it!”
As Ronove joked about it, Sabato was carried away on a stretcher. He had given it his all but had nothing to show for it.
One of the spectators wiped away a tear. “We sure lost a good man today. Of course, logically, attempting to down that amount of wine is sheer madness in the first place!”
“Now that you mention it... But hey, I can’t say I dislike a prince who bravely faces a challenge even though he knows it’s beyond him!” his neighbor replied.
The mood in the venue suddenly turned solemn as everyone’s thoughts turned to their fallen hero.
“Ladies and gentlemen, Mel-sama’s refill has just arrived! And so have her snacks! Both are being placed in front of her as a set!”
“Whoaaaa! You got this, The Smile!”
“Damn, the food started disappearing the moment the plate was put down!”
“Hurry up and bring the champion his wine too!”
The temperature in the air shot right back up again. The beastkin definitely knew how to change gears quickly. Kelvin, who was having trouble acclimating to the violent ups and downs, could only smile wryly.
“Well...Sabato did his best, I’ll give him that.”
“I-I guess, aha ha...”
“Good luck, Grandpa Gerard!”
“My data told me this would happen!”
When Kelvin looked at Ruka and Shutola, he came to a realization—namely, that the only true “winner” at an event is someone who fully enjoys it.
“The clock is ticking down! It’s make-or-break time! Mel-sama is in the lead, but the two veterans seem to be catching up! As for Goldiana-sama—”
“Mm, what a marvelous aroma... Yes? You called?”
Goldiana was enjoying a very elegant moment, pouring tea into his teacup with a slice of shortcake sitting in his lap.
“Where did you pull all that out from?!”
“Oh my, do you really want to know?”
“Actually, I can kind of imagine, so I’m good! But in spite of everything he’s got going on, Goldiana-sama has still drunk more wine than Sabato-sama! Can you believe it?! However, his distance behind the top three is significant! Clearly, those with a chance at the prizes have been narrowed down to Mel-sama, Nellas-sama, and Gerard-sama! And even as I speak, time is running out! This is the moment for one last push!”
The plate before Melfina was already empty, meaning she only had Juuoushu to focus on now. Gerard also had his barrel tilted high up, making that last run for the finish line. Half of Nellas was obscured from view as he continued employing his strategy from earlier. They were truly neck and neck. The competition would be decided by whoever managed to finish their barrel first.
In the midst of this white-hot race, Goldiana suddenly turned to Gerard and said supportingly, “Go for broke, Gerard-sama!” He winked one time, then a second. Pink hearts appeared and flew over the empty seats in a gentle curve, aiming straight for Gerard, who was just about to finish.
“GYAHHHH?!”
Both of them were direct hits. The hearts filled one hundred percent with love sent the knight flying backwards with violent force.
“G-Gerard-sama was sent flyiiiing!” Ronove exclaimed as both Ruka and Shutola cried, “Grandpa Gerard!”
Kelvin shuddered. “Here I was, wondering why the pink heart is always visible. Turns out it was an actual physical attack. Oof, that’s terrifying.”
“Can you call it ‘a physical approach’ instead?” Goldiana returned.
The impact was so strong that Gerard had been buried deep within the wall. He showed no sign of coming back out.
“Medics!” Ronove cried. “Hurry and save Gerard-sama!”
Goldiana leaped up. “No, there’s no need! With how deep he is inside the wall, I’m the most suitable for helping him!”
Ronove faltered. “Um, in that case...”
“No! That’s the one thing I can’t handle!” With loud sounds of crumbling, Gerard suddenly extracted himself from the wall and took off at a dash.
“You shouldn’t be running, Gerard-sama! You might be hurt somewheeere! Let me diagnose youuuu!” Goldiana also disappeared before anyone noticed, taking off in pursuit of the knight. The sight of him running was much less elegant than...artistic. The world’s greatest muscles bunched up, swelled, and bulged as they burst into movement.
In any case, Gerard and Goldiana were out of the competition.
“I-It feels like a typhoon just came and went, but let’s get our heads back in the competition! Only two contestants remain! No matter who wins, this will soon be over! Make sure to keep your eyes open, ladies and gentlemen! Get fired up like you’ve never been!”
“YAAAAAHHHHHH!”
Thanks to Ronove’s follow-up, the odd incident was promptly forgotten as the excitement in the venue peaked.
“Looks like commentators have it tough too.”
“I guess so.”
There was no time to waste feeling sentimental. Melfina drank! And Nellas dove! The time ticked, ticked, tick—
“IT’S OVERRRRR!”
The competition came to an end.
“Not too shabby,” Melfina commented.
“I could say the same of you,” Nellas returned.
Ronove gasped loudly. “I-It looks like...both barrels are empty!”
There wasn’t a single drop of liquid left in either the barrel Melfina lowered or the one Nellas had crawled back out of.
“A shocking tie! A shocking double win! However, the prize is one of a kind! That leaves us—”
“No, she is the winner,” Nellas interrupted quietly but firmly, placing a hand on the edge of his empty tankard.
“Huh? Wh-What do you mean, Nellas-sama?” Ronove asked.
“Is it not obvious to you? Mel-san here tied with me while also eating. From what I saw, what she ate was around the same amount as what she drank. To call this result a tie would be far too brazen of me. A true champion is one who far outstrips the competition. This old bag of bones will be going into retirement as of today. However, do not be sad! This is the start of a new era, with a new wind blowing through the scene!”
“So you mean to say, the winner—”
“Is Mel-san! Congratulations, Mel-san! I look forward to seeing what you will achieve as the queen who spearheads this next generation!”
Cheers, hurrahs, whistles, and applause exploded, rocking the venue. Mel and Nellas exchanged a firm handshake in appreciation of each other’s performances. Soon, a golden trophy in the shape of a wine bottle was carried in. Melfina held this symbol of a drinking sovereign high up above her head, the most heavenly smile gracing her face.
“You sure drank like a champ, The Smile!”
“And ate like one too!”
“Congratulations, big sister Mel!”
“Good work out there. So, who’s the year’s supply of wine for?”
“Mel-nee, you were super cool!”
“Thank you, everyone! Thank you!”
The fired-up competition filled with twists and turns was finally over with the crowning of a new champion. Thanks to this, the name “The Smile” spread like wildfire beyond the boundaries of the competitive eating world as a living legend, the invincible goddess who could make all food and drink disappear with but a wave of a hand.
“Lastly, can we have a final word from our winner? Mel-sama, go ahead!”
“Of course! My nerves have left me feeling slightly peckish again, so I’m going to pay a few of the stalls around here a visit!”
