Volume 1, Chapter 12 – The Moon is Beautiful Tonight

By the time she came to her senses, Fia was already walking on the street outside the slave merchant’s guild.

In her memory, after Claire suggested they take a walk together, she had subconsciously agreed. This absolutely couldn’t be blamed on her lack of resolve—facing a moon elf like Claire, she simply couldn’t find a reason to refuse.

And to be honest, she really needed someone like Claire, an outsider, to offer her advice now. As the saying goes, “Those closely involved cannot see as clearly as those outside.” Perhaps Claire could provide an answer that would satisfy everyone.

The night was deep, and the streets were almost empty, illuminated only by the moonlight and the faint candlelight from a few windows, making it seem particularly desolate. But Fia didn’t mind. Nighttime was always a moment for reflection, and her thoughts were clearest when no one else was around.

“So, you’re saying that the current you isn’t the original noble young lady, but a soul possessing her body?”

Claire, walking slowly beside her, tilted her head to look at Fia’s face as she asked in a tone that was hard to read.

Unlike Anastasia, Claire was an outsider, so Fia didn’t explain the real situation. Instead, she used a similar analogy—replacing the identity of the elf princess with that of a noble young lady, while she herself was a soul that had accidentally taken over the noble lady’s body. In this world, souls were mysterious and elusive, and though they weren’t well-liked, they weren’t entirely unacceptable. It was worth noting that souls were different from ghosts; the two were distinct concepts.

Lowering her head to look at her feet, Fia sighed helplessly.

“Yes. If things were as Anna said—that the young lady had just lost her memories due to severe injuries—I wouldn’t mind accepting it. In fact, I’d be happy to. But my memories contain things that clearly don’t belong to the noble young lady. In other words, the young lady died in the accident, and I’m the one who came afterward.”

“Anna” referred to Anastasia. After all, Anastasia was the captain of the Imperial Guard’s Second Division, and there was no guarantee Claire wasn’t aware of this. So it was better to conceal it. It didn’t affect the narrative anyway.

“What about your own thoughts? Do you want to return to being your original self, or live on as the young lady? From what you’ve said, it doesn’t seem like you willingly possessed this body, right?”

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“Of course not. I just opened my eyes and found myself in this body. As for my thoughts…” Fia paused. Though what she was about to say was shameless, Claire was a stranger. Even if she was disliked, it didn’t matter. “I’d like to be the young lady, to experience things I’ve never felt before—things I’ve never experienced.”

She had almost slipped and said “warmth.”

If she had actually said it, it would have been too brazen—as if she was desperate for someone’s care.

To cover up her awkwardness, Fia quickly continued.

“But I can’t accept just pretending to have amnesia and starting from scratch. I don’t know if you can understand this, Claire, but I feel that accepting others’ affection under the young lady’s identity is just self-deception. The people who care are really caring about the young lady, not ‘me.’ In the quiet of the night, I’d feel hollow about my own hypocrisy. I know it’s all fake.”

“Surprisingly principled, but not in a bad way.”

“So, I plan to tell Anna the truth once I go back. Better a short pain than a long one. Clearing things up early will be better for everyone. I can search for what I want in this world, and they won’t have to waste their emotions on someone completely unrelated.”

“Fia, do you really think that’s fine?”

Claire’s question made Fia feel puzzled. Normally, people would think “that’s fine.” Pretending to be someone else was something that was never acceptable, no matter the era or world.

Fia couldn’t help but frown and turn to look at Claire. At this moment, Claire was gazing straight ahead, her expression detached, as if it had nothing to do with her.

“What do you mean, ‘that’s fine’?”

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“Of course, I’m talking about your true feelings. You don’t actually want this, do you?”

“People can have desires, but they can’t pursue them endlessly. That’s no different from beasts. You can’t compromise on matters of principle.”

“In other words, stopping here would leave Fia satisfied.”

“Exactly.”

“Haaah.” Suddenly, Claire let out a long sigh, crossed her arms, and spoke in a tone like she was lecturing a junior. “Then what about Anna? What will happen to them?”

They’d probably be heartbroken.

Fia didn’t even need to think to reach that conclusion. Even now, when she stood before Anastasia, the latter would sob and beg for forgiveness. If she learned that the elf princess was truly beyond saving, the pain would be unimaginable.

Before Fia could answer, Claire pressed further.

“How do you feel about Anna?”

“She’s reliable, trustworthy, and a capable assistant.”

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“And you think it’s fine to just let her grieve like that? Forgive my bluntness, but I don’t agree with your approach—for you, it’s a way to clear your conscience. But for others, and even for yourself, it’s too cruel. Lies can be divided into good and bad. A white lie wouldn’t weigh on your conscience. In the end, you don’t have to play the role of the young lady—you can just be yourself. Isn’t gaining others’ recognition through your own abilities also an option?”

“What do you mean?”

Without a lecturing tone, but rather as a suggestion, Claire replied.

“From an outsider’s perspective, you’re overcomplicating things. If Fia’s possession of the young lady’s body is seen as a blessing from the gods, then perhaps the gods’ intention wasn’t for Fia to play the role of the young lady, but to comfort the living in place of the deceased soul. Of course, that might be hard for Fia to accept, but don’t you also long for the bonds the young lady had?”

“Listen, amnesia might be a convenient explanation, but for those who truly understand, it’s just an excuse to seek comfort. Because they can’t accept reality, they’d rather believe the young lady just lost her memories than face her death. But given enough time, they’ll eventually come to understand and accept the truth.”

“Are you saying I should lie?”

From this perspective, perhaps she really should play the role of the elf princess. She could experience bonds she’d never had before, while Anastasia and the others wouldn’t have to grieve over the princess’s death. In the end, they’d peacefully accept the truth, and everyone would benefit.

But Claire immediately rejected Fia’s question.

“No, I’m not telling Fia what to do. I’m just offering a different perspective. And besides, compared to worrying about that girl Anna, I’m more concerned about you, Fia.”

As she spoke, Claire’s face was already filled with a teasing smile.

Even though Fia knew she was being toyed with, she couldn’t help but feel her heart skip a beat. When a beautiful, elegant woman like Claire joked around, it was hard for anyone not to be moved—especially since Claire’s personality hit Fia’s preferences perfectly. Fia liked mature women.

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“…Can I take that as you saying, ‘The moon is beautiful tonight’?”

Fia fought back, unwilling to be outdone.

With an exaggerated reaction, Claire immediately stepped back, her clear emerald eyes widening.

“I didn’t mean it like that! What I meant was, compared to Anna, whom I’ve never met, I’ve at least had a heart-to-heart with Fia tonight. So rather than worrying about Anna, I’m more on Fia’s side. Fia should think more about herself.”

“Is that so…?”

Lost in thought, Fia lowered her head. Only when they were nearly at the end of the street did she finally raise her head, exhaling deeply as if expelling all her worries. Then, she smiled back at Claire.

“I have my answer now. Thank you, Claire.”

“Don’t mention it. Consider it a thank you gift for helping me save that beastgirl earlier. If I could be of help, then I’d be glad.” Like someone who had just resolved a troublesome matter, Claire lightly patted her dark blue dress, her waterfall-like silver hair swaying behind her. “I should be going now.”

“O-Oh, right. I wanted to ask, Claire—what was that about a curse earlier?”

This was her first time taking a nighttime stroll with someone she’d just met, and Fia couldn’t help but feel a vague sense of loss.