24 — A Heart-to-Heart

Mr. Fisalis led me outside the villa, either to distract himself from how flustered he was after bearing his whole soul like that, or to give the servants the time they needed to collect themselves. Not that I thought my leaving the villa was really all that necessary. I almost suspected that Rohtas, Stellaria, and the rest just wanted me gone for a spell. I’m sure they’re all huddled in a circle right now. I can see it now. I would have loved to be a part of it, but... they’ve banished me.

The sun was about to set. Mr. Fisalis and I were walking down the hill road, hand in hand. Wonder where we’re going?

Mr. Fisalis hadn’t said a word since we’d left the villa. He just kept looking ahead, so I had no idea where our destination might be. I knew there would be even more lowlifes prowling around once it got dark, so I figured he couldn’t possibly be taking us very far. I continued to follow silently. But if we continue down this path, we’ll eventually end up in town again...

In the end, however, we veered onto a side road that diverged at a point not too far from the villa. The “side road” was actually more like a game trail, so I hadn’t noticed it this morning. But Mr. Fisalis was striding down it purposefully, so it must have led somewhere.

“Um, Mr. Fisalis?” I ventured nervously.

“What is it?” He finally turned to look at me.

“Is there something down this way?”

“Hmm, well... you can be the judge of that.”

What does THAT mean?

...Ahem. I looked up at him with probing eyes, but he just chuckled.

“Don’t worry; please just keep following me.”

“Um, sure?” My head was still titled in puzzlement. He started walking again, pulling me by the hand.

Mr. Fisalis finally stopped walking at a point that wasn’t visible from the road that led into town. It was just a slight slope with nothing noteworthy in sight. I looked around, wondering if this was the destination he was so keen to get to. It was then that I noticed how this was the only place I’d seen so far where the weeds had been neatly removed. It was almost like a lawn, but the space was so small only about four adults could stand inside it. Where had he brought me?

“Mr. Fisalis?”

“This place... I liked coming here, when I was a kid,” he replied, smiling cheerfully while pointing down beyond the hill. I turned to look, and Le Pied’s townscape spread out before my eyes.

The sun was setting, sinking below the edge of the mountains, and its rays painted the whole town an even more vivid red (what with the red stones used for all the buildings!). The lighting was simply gorgeous.

“Wow! It’s so pretty! It’s like the whole town is one big ruby!” I heaved a sigh in spite of myself.

I see. Even I, here for the first time, am getting swept up by the majesty of the view. I can see why Mr. Fisalis would come to love this place for its superb scenery!

“It is, isn’t it? I’ve loved this place since I was a kid. I figured this was the perfect place to cool my head a bit. I can feel it working its magic already.” He was smiling peacefully as he gazed down at the town below.

So, this place is kept so neat because Mr. Fisalis is fond of it! But he hasn’t visited the territory in so long. Since this spot is still so bereft of weeds, that must mean someone (the villa gardener or somesuch, I’m sure) has been sparing it their thoughts and effort this whole time.

The territory villa was staffed by the older servants from the manor in the capital. As such, there was a collection of servants who had doted on Mr. Fisalis when he was a callow young man. At the end of the day, Mr. Fisalis really is loved. And my soul has benefited greatly from the servants’ kindness, too!

Mr. Fisalis sat down in the first spot that caught his eye and stretched out his long legs, placing his hands on the ground behind his back. He sighed while watching the setting sun. “When I relax like this, I start feeling embarrassed again.”

Embarrassed from how you poured your heart out earlier? I feel you.

“For so long, I just did as I pleased. ...I owe Rohtas and Dahlia so much,” he continued, as he gazed down at the shining red of Le Pied.

So he brought me here because he was too embarrassed to tell me about these things within earshot of the others. Don’t worry, I’ll gladly hear you out! And I see that reserved half-smile. That’s the smile of self-deprecation; I’d know it anywhere.

As a newcomer to the family, I couldn’t really say anything, so I decided to simply lend an ear to hear what he had to say.

“I completely left the territory to Father, Rohtas, and others besides. And I completely left affairs in the manor to Rohtas and Dahlia. Honestly, what was I doing with myself all this time?”

You were fooling around with your girlfriend, is what.

...Ah, sorry, that was blunt. But it’s also just the truth.

Granted, while he’d abandoned the territory and the manor, he’d always followed through on his duties as a knight. All of his subordinates vouched for him, so I didn’t doubt that. But for Rohtas to have managed both the territory and the manor... He’s incredible! Rohtas, you’re allowed to get angry. I’ll back you up!

...or so my heart cried out. Ah, don’t worry—I wouldn’t say that out loud. I was just spurring Mr. Fisalis on with “uh-huh”s, my face a docile mask. Don’t call me a chicken for it ☆

“But there’s no changing the past,” he continued. “I’ll just have to make up for all of that going forward. Boy, have I got my work cut out for me.” He looked up at me, smiling wryly.

Um, if Rohtas seriously did all of the work you were supposed to do this whole time, I don’t think a wry smile’s going to cut it, mister. I shudder to think of the righteous indignation he will unleash.

“You do have a lot of work ahead of you, but I’m sure Rohtas and the servants will help out. You’ll be all right.” They’ve been with you this whole time. They never gave up on you. And those outstanding men and women would certainly never miss this chance to set you on the right path, now that you’re trying to turn over a new leaf!

“I’m truly glad I have such a dependable staff.”

“As well you should be! You need to value them more, and take good care of them too!”

“Ha ha ha! I will, promise.” He paused. “...So much has changed since you came into my life, Viola. The manor, the servants... I never knew they were so full of life, or that they could work with such a spring in their steps. Maybe it was my fault they weren’t like that before you came. But never mind that—the biggest things that changed are my own feelings. I feel like I wasn’t seeing things clearly before. Like my vision has only just become unclouded.”

Wait, we were talking about his repentance and the servants, and now we’re suddenly talking about me? I looked down at him in amazement.

He pulled his handkerchief from his breast pocket and laid it down beside him, patting it in invitation as he looked up at me. I guess that means I should sit down. Guess it’s kind of dumb I’ve been listening to him on my feet. Don’t even really know why I was doing that.

I sat down obediently. I’m sorry I was looking down on you—literally!

Mr. Fisalis turned his gaze back to the townscape. “When Callie unceremoniously dumped me, it didn’t affect me that deeply. But when you said you didn’t think anything of me, I was surprised I was able to bear it more than I thought I would,” he said, again with a wry smile.

Ah, right, I remember that little rough patch! I did say that! I mean, he came at me with, “I like you now, so I broke up with Callie” so suddenly. What was I supposed to make of it?

“But Mr. Fisalis, you were going to marry me because she was so important to you.”

“Initially, yes.”

“You said you’d come to care for me, but you showed no sign of that whatsoever, so it came pretty much out of nowhere.”

“...Oh, I think I did show some signs...”

“You did? Because I didn’t get that at all.” I truly hadn’t noticed. I just remembered thinking we were conversing a little more than before, and he was being a little nicer.

“The others probably did pick up on it, I reckon...” he mumbled quietly.

I didn’t hear exactly what he said. He was scratching the tip of his nose and facing away from me.

Oh well, whatever.

“I will say, when a complete stranger—and someone who was so much higher than me he might as well be standing on a cloud—asked me out of nowhere to become his show wife because he already had a girlfriend, I consented. And yet before I knew it, you broke up with her... because you were interested in me now. And then you suddenly wanted us to be a normal married couple. It’s all been too much for me to keep up with. Feelings this, feelings that. It’s all fine for you, Mr. Fisalis—you’ve always been true to your own feelings. But what about me? What about my feelings?”

Ack, I ended up speaking my mind again. But it sure feels good to let it out.

I didn’t dislike Mr. Fisalis. He didn’t treat me poorly, even when there was no real affection between us. In fact, I feel like he’s only begun to be remotely interesting to me recently. This is the first time I’ve felt this way, so even I’m not sure what I’m feeling.

At first, Mr. Fisalis had been staring at me with wide-eyed astonishment. “Urggh. There’s so much I could say right now, but I’ll put it all aside for now... I think I did wrong by you.” He cast his gaze down, and I couldn’t help but notice his long lashes.

“Might it not be the case that you hurt her more than you’ve hurt me?”

“Callie and I have come to an understanding, so no worries there. But there is something I’ve done to you that’s unacceptable.”

“Really?”

“Yes. And furthermore, there’s something I’ve never been able to tell you.”

“...What might that be?”

I had no idea. I looked into his dark brown eyes.

“A simple ‘I’m sorry.’ I pushed you into a terrible contract, and tied your whole life down. I want to properly apologize to you for how utterly selfish I was,” he said, his face tightening as he wrapped my hand in his hands and stared straight into my eyes.