Chapter 4: A Steamy Hot Spring Vacation

◇Houghtow City◇

In a corner of Houghtow was a three-story masonry building: the headquarters of the Merchants’ Guild. Rys standing to the side of the main door, waiting.

Flio stepped out of the building. “Rys, I’m back!”

Rys happily strolled towards her husband. “It’s good to see you, my love!” Flio beamed and ran up. “Did you finish your business here?” Rys asked.

“I did. The procedure was a lot more straightforward than I expected. All that’s left is to wait and see if it passes the examination.”

“I’m certain it will. It is yours, after all.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re so sure,” said Flio, smiling at his wife who had by this point begun to lightly cling to his left arm. “Either way, all we have to do now is wait.” Suddenly seeming to remember something, he took a piece of paper out of his pants pocket. “Oh, and also this!” he said. “The people at the guild gave me this. Apparently it’s their thanks for me helping them out...”

“What is it, my love?” Rys looked curiously at the ticket in Flio’s hand.

“A lottery ticket, apparently,” he said. “They told me there’s a discount sale happening in the shopping district. It sounds like there’s some kind of event going on.”

“A lottery... What kind of lottery is this, exactly?”

“I’m not sure myself. This is the first I’ve heard of it too. But since we have the ticket, shall we go check it out?”

“Certainly!”

The two of them walked side by side through the crowded shopping district. Today it seemed even more crowded than usual. “Is it always like this when there’s a sale?” Rys mused, looking curiously all around her. “It looks like a festival.”

“It does, doesn’t it,” said Flio. “It’s probably something like a festival for the shops here. There were events like this in my world too, when merchants would sell all sorts of things for cheap. A lot of people would come to try to get good bargains.”

“Oh? I see. Did you sell your wares in such events too, my lord?”

“No,” said Flio. “I was in charge of inventory. I was always interested in sales, but I ended up in this world before I could try my hand at it.”

Flio and Rys chatted about this and that as they made their way towards the plaza in the middle of the shopping district. “Oh,” said Flio. “This is it, Rys. The lottery should be around here.” Flio looked around the plaza, and saw an area where an even larger crowd had gathered than there was everywhere else. They were gathering in front of a tent decorated in a banner that read “Lottery Grounds.”

“Yeah, that’s gotta be it,” said Flio. “We should get in line.”

“All right,” said Rys. The two of them took their place in the back of the line. “It seems tremendously popular, this lottery...”

“They have some incredible stuff,” said Flio. “Look!” He pointed to the back of the tent, where a large paper was pinned up listing the lottery prizes.

Rys squinted as she looked at it. “My lord husband...” she said, “I know what the first prize is, but the second prize is a ‘hot springs vacation’? What exactly is a hot spring?”

“Hm? Rys, you don’t know about hot springs?”

“N-No... I’d never heard them mentioned in the Dark—I mean, in the place I used to work. What about you, my lord husband?”

“Yeah, we had them in my world too. Hot springs are good for all kinds of things!” Flio looked again at the list of prizes. “Second place prize is a trip to the Kinosaki Hot Springs. It sounds like there are seven springs, all with different benefits. Vitality... Beautiful skin... Health... Oh, this one is for people hoping for children...”

“My lord husband!” Rys shot a look at Flio, a strange light in her eyes. She sidled up to him even closer. “What did you just say?!”

“Hm? You mean...the seven hot springs?”

“No, after that! The benefits!”

“The...benefits?” Flio had a sudden moment of panic over what the people around him must think about Rys crawling all over him in full view of the crowd, but Rys only drew closer.

“Yes! The benefits!”

“U-Um, Vitality, Beautiful skin...”

“No, not those! The last one!”

“The last one? That’s... Oh! You mean the one for people who want children?”

“Yes!” Rys’s face was aglow with excitement. “That means it might help us make babies, doesn’t it?!” Somehow, she drew even closer to Flio. Her eyes were sparkling.

Flio, for his part, was feeling ever more mortified. “Ah, I... Well, yes, that might very well be the case.”

“It might!” Rys turned to look at the tent. “Let’s aim for that one, my husband! We have to get the second prize no matter what!” Rys squeezed her fists tight as she stared fixedly at the list of prizes. Her cheeks were red. She was breathing hard. There was absolutely no mistaking her excitement. She was so excited, in fact, that she had at some point sprouted a wolf tail. Right now it was wagging vigorously from side to side.

Flio noticed and quickly hid her tail with magic. But this resulted in Rys’s skirt seeming to move around on its own accord as her invisible tail wagged underneath it. Her undergarments were in full view.

Flio, blushing, positioned himself behind Rys, hoping that with him blocking the line of sight, nobody else would notice.

Finally, they worked their way through the line and reached the tent. “One ticket?” asked the woman wearing bright red festival garb. “All right, draw one of the tabs from the box, please.”

Rys, who Flio had entrusted with their lottery ticket, looked at the large box in the woman’s hands. “So...I stick my hand in this hole and pull out a tab?”

“Yes, exactly. Oh! And no using magic to see what you’re getting. There’s a magic sensor in the hole—it’ll make a sound if it detects any magic. You don’t get a prize if the sensor goes off!”

“I... I see...” Rys shook her hand, swallowing nervously. Flio smirked knowingly as he watched. It didn’t escape his attention that Rys had hastily turned off the sensor spell she had been using. Rys took a deep breath and slowly reached into the hole. She closed her eyes tight enough for wrinkles to appear on her forehead as she fervently searched around inside the box with her hand.

“I have it!” Rys’s eyes shot open, and she pulled her hand out. She was clutching a wooden tab, about the size of her palm. It was blue. “What prize is this?!” she asked, thrusting the tab in front of the woman in the festival attire.

The woman smiled cheerfully for a moment. Then, she picked up a handbell from the desk and took a deep breath. “Congratulations!” she shouted, ringing the bell as loud as an alarm. “We have a winner for our second prize: a hot springs vacation for two!”

“Ooh?! Someone got the second prize!”

“Nice going, missy!”

“Congrats!” Cheers and congratulations rang out from all around the tent.

As the crowd applauded, Rys raised her arms high in the air in celebration. “My lord husband! I did it! I did it! I did it!” She squeezed him tight, grinning with her whole face. Flio caught her in his arms, smiling the whole time. Rys was positively bursting with joy. Not just her tail, now, but her wolf ears also had become visible. Flio rushed to hide them the same way he had hidden her tail, the whole time holding her in his arms and grinning.

It was some time before the applause and cheers died down.

◇Flio and Rys’s Room—That Night◇

Flio and Rys had been roundly congratulated by everyone who lived with them for winning a hot springs vacation in a lottery. “Your faithful servant Hiya will tend to the affairs of your house, Exalted One,” Hiya had said. “So please, relax and enjoy yourself.” Balirossa, Blossom, Byleri, and Belano, and even Ghozal and Uliminas who had only recently started living with them nodded along to Hiya’s words.

Now, Rys was lying in bed, her head resting against her husband’s arm. “My love, I’m looking forward to this trip, you know...”

Flio smiled. “Things have been so busy at home. You and I have hardly had a chance to travel anywhere,” he said. “It’s a bit late, I guess, but maybe we could consider this our honeymoon.”

“Our...honeymoon?” Rys flushed a little, smiling happily at Flio’s words. “When we go to the hot springs, my love, I intend to make full use of the childbirth water. So, please... You’ll treat me properly, won’t you?” She crawled up onto Flio’s chest as she spoke. “And...tonight, as well.” She closed her eyes, and pressed her lips to his. Flio pulled Rys into a tight embrace and turned off the magic lantern, leaving the room in darkness.

◇Deep in a Forest◇

Deep in a forest somewhere, Tsuya was looking troubled. “O-Oh... Hero Gold-Hair, are you all riiight?”

Hero Gold-Hair had collapsed onto his hands and knees on the ground in front of her and was now moaning in pain. “I don’t know...” he said. “Why... Why do I feel so strange... Like there’s something inside of me...” He clawed at his chest, his face twisted in agony.

“Aaah! H-Hero Gold-Haaair!” Tsuya put her hand on Gold-Hair’s shoulder, her eyes full of worry. But neither of them noticed the black mist seeping out of the Bottomless Bag on his belt slowly entering his body through his nose and mouth as he breathed in...

◇Flio’s House—The Following Morning◇

Flio was standing in the entryway to his house, cheerfully waving goodbye to everyone. “Right then, we’re off!”

“We’ll see you in two days!” added Rys, grinning.

“Tell us if the place is any good!” said Blossom. “Next time maybe we’ll all go!” Everyone who was being left behind nodded cheerfully.

Flio smiled back. “Of course! It would be great to go on a trip with everyone!” With that, he raised his right hand and summoned a small magic circle as a larger one appeared in front of himself and Rys. “And we’re off!” he said, pulling Rys in close. A second later, the circle vanished, taking the couple with it.

◇Kinosaki Hot Springs Village◇

Flio and Rys emerged from the magic circle onto a peaceful village road. Here and there they could see steam rising. The unique scent of the hot springs reached Rys’s nose and she squeezed Flio’s arm happily. “Oh how I’ve looked forward to this, my love.” But as she turned her head to look at her husband, something suddenly caught her attention. She whipped her head around and her smile vanished. “What is...that?”

In the middle of the peaceful village road, there stood an enormous monster. Its head was that of a bull, its lower body a ram’s. It had a mane of golden hair. It raised its absurdly large head and bellowed as it stomped through the village towards them, flattening buildings indiscriminately. The part of the village nearest to the mountains already looked badly damaged. Tongues of flame lapped at the buildings behind the monster.

Rys stared in shock. “What is... What...?” Her body began to shake as the rage built and built inside her. “You...fiend!” she shrieked. “How dare you interfere with my dream honeymoon!” She dodged past Flio as he moved to stop her and charged straight for the monster, turning into a giant wolf as she ran. Rys the lupine roared as she plowed into the thing, toppling it backwards.

“Oh no!” Flio’s abilities detected a number of humans in the path of the collapsing monster. He raised both hands and conjured a magic circle, summoning a wall of light in the path of its fall. The monster crashed into Flio’s wall and slid down. Rys charged the thing again without hesitation, knocking it back against the wall once more.

Flio used his right hand to maintain the wall while he created another magic circle with his left, teleporting the people away to a safe area. “It might be a bit of a mess if we do this right here,” he said. Once again he brought both arms in front of him, and a vast magic circle appeared in the air above Rys and the monster she was wrestling. He lowered his hands and the circle fell, swallowing up the two of them as it reached their bodies before disappearing on impact with the ground. Rys and her opponent were nowhere to be seen. “Well, that worked okay,” Flio said. He sighed with relief and raised his right arm one final time.

A large magic circle appeared before Flio. He walked into the center of it and was sucked in, vanishing from sight.

◇A Forest◇

A colossal magic circle appeared somewhere in a wild forest untouched by human hands. Out from it came Rys and the monstrous creature.

This monster held tremendous magic, but it was not fully capable of controlling its power. It lashed out again and again with magic, writhing in pain each time. Rys, however, had always been strong with magic. She struck and struck at the thing, enraged that it would dare stand in the way of her hot springs vacation with her husband! As their magic attacks collided, she tore at the monster with her claws and teeth.

In the shadow of the clashing beasts, Flio was engaged in a struggle of an entirely different sort. A jet of flame from the monster’s mouth missed Rys and sailed off into the forest, setting the trees alight, but Flio used his magic to extinguish the blaze. One of the magic bolts from Rys’s spells strayed off course, but Flio dispelled it before it could do any damage, then created a barrier around the area. All in all, he devoted himself to working behind the scenes, using his magic to mitigate as much damage as possible.

Flio could tell this monster had a decently impressive level of magic, but he was sure it was nothing Rys in her lupine form couldn’t handle. He thought it best to let Rys vent her anger on the thing and take care of things from the back like this. He was not wrong. Rys had no trouble wiping the floor with the thing. Not for one second was she at a disadvantage.

The fight didn’t last long. The monster let out a sound halfway between a howl and a scream and fell to the ground. Rys stood triumphantly in her lupine form, looking down imperiously at her fallen foe. “Now you will pay the price for getting in our way,” she growled. “With blood!” Her claws gleamed cruelly as she prepared the finishing blow.

But then, quite suddenly, a woman popped out from the monster’s golden mane on the top of its head. “I’m sooorry!” she shouted. “I’m so, so sooorry! Please, pleaaase don’t kill uuus! He’s not doing this ’cause he waaants to!” The woman, her clothing ripped, her hair burnt in patches, her body covered in cuts and scrapes, supplicated herself desperately before the wolf. “A weeeird black mist came out of this!” she said, holding up a Bottomless Bag. “It went in his booody and made him like thaaat! He couldn’t controool himself!”

Flio used Teleportation and appeared between Rys and Tsuya, magically floating in the air. He flew up to Tsuya where she was standing in the monster’s golden mane and took the bag from her hands. As he checked the contents, he knit his brow. “What’s this...?” The bag was full to the brim with precious jewelry: necklaces and collars and the like set with gems, mundane and magical. All of them were suffused with malicium. The dark energy was seeping out everywhere. It seemed that most of the malicium had already found its way out of the bag and that the flow had mostly subsided. There was still a tremendous amount of malicium inside, though, and if anyone were to take an item from the bag it would almost certainly come with a generous helping of the stuff. It was quite a dangerous little thing.

There is, of course, an explanation for this. The properties of malicium make it easily absorbed by gems of all sorts, including magic gems. The vast number of gems in the Dark Citadel’s treasury were kept not only as treasure but also to prevent the concentration of malicium in the Dark Citadel from becoming too high by absorbing the excess. Even Infernal-tier demons would start to feel under the weather if the malicium was too thick, so you can understand why such precaution must be taken. By sheer dumb luck, Hero Gold-Hair had picked out an assemblage of some of the most malicium-saturated gems in the whole treasury.

“So, basically you’re saying that there was enough malicium coming out of this bag to corrupt his will and turn him into a monster?” Flio glanced at the monster who was now lying motionless on the ground. “Well, whatever the case, we can’t just leave him like this.” He raised his right arm.

Tsuya, thinking Flio meant to finish Gold-Hair off, interposed herself between them in a panic. “We’re sooo, sooo sooorry!” she shouted, spreading her arms as wide as she could to protect him. “Pleaaase let him go!”

The voice seemed to rouse the monster. He slowly raised his head. He picked Tsuya up, holding her tight, and deposited her behind him. Then he stood, giving Flio a defiant look. Some subconscious part of him seemed to be trying to protect Tsuya, even with his will corrupted by the malicium.

Flio, however, smiled kindly at the beast. “Don’t worry,” he said. “I’m not gonna kill him.” He raised both arms, and a large magic circle appeared above Hero Gold-Hair’s head. The circle sucked the malicium out of his body with astonishing force. It looked like black smoke. Without the corrupting influence, Hero Gold-Hair’s body became gradually smaller and smaller before finally returning to its original human form, stark naked. His body was still battered and injured from his fight with Rys. Even his pretty face was badly beaten up.

“Ohhh!” Tsuya ran up to him. She took off her cloak and wrapped it around Hero Gold-Hair, covering his body. “You’re back to nooormal!” she wept. “Thank the gods!”

Flio glanced at the couple, and then turned his attention back to the Bottomless Bag. The inside was saturated enough with malicium that it would take even him two or three days to purify it completely. Corruption this thorough would take one hundred of Klyrode’s best mages fifty years to cleanse.

I probably should hold on to this for now, Flio thought. He turned back towards Hero Gold-Hair and Tsuya. “Excuse me,” he said, “would you let me have this bag for two or three days? I could—”

Hero Gold-Hair was clutching his head in pain. His response was curt. “Keep it.”

“Oh, but—”

“Keep it. You can do whatever you want with the thing.” He pulled himself to his unsteady feet and began to walk deeper into the forest. Tsuya hurried to his side.

“W-Well, then at least let me pay you for it...” Flio said, taking a bag of coins out from his own Bottomless Bag and offering it to Hero Gold-Hair.

But the man was obstinate. “I told you already. Just keep it,” he said and turned to leave.

A second later he turned back. Supporting himself by leaning on Tsuya’s shoulder, he hobbled up to Flio with a defeated look on his face. “Actually...” he said. “I’ll take enough money to buy underwear. No, clothes. I mean clothes.” He stuck his hand in the bag of money Flio had offered and withdrew a scant handful of coins which he stuck in his cloak’s pockets. Then the two of them vanished into the forest.

Flio watched the two leave, then walked up to Rys, who had returned to her humanoid form. “My lord,” she said dubiously, “who exactly was that man? If he is with the Dark Army, the wise thing to do might be to kill him before he does something worse.”

“Hm...” Flio crossed his arms and lowered his head in thought. “He was under the effects of malicium, so it’s hard to be sure, but I feel like I’ve met him somewhere before...” Flio would normally be able to recognize Hero Gold-Hair, but with his face messed up from his battle with Rys, he hadn’t noticed who it was. “That said, I didn’t get the sense that he was a bad person.”

“You didn’t?”

“Yeah. I mean, it looked like he cares a lot about the woman who was with him.”

“You think so...?” Rys gently grabbed hold of Flio’s arm. “Then I suppose that is that,” she said, pressing her head against his shoulder. They stayed like that for a short while.

“Okay,” said Flio, “are you ready to get back to our hot springs vacation?”

“I very much am, my lord husband,” said Rys. Flio smiled at her words.

◇Kinosaki Hot Springs Village◇

Flio and Rys teleported back to Kinosaki Village and walked to the inn on foot. When they got there, they found a large sign set up by the entrance. Rys’s eyes went wide, and she froze on the spot. “What...?”

The sign read:

Hot Springs are presently closed for repairs due to monster attack —Kinosaki Hot Springs Association.

Rys’s face twitched. “This... This is... My lord husband, with... With your magic you could fix this in a snap...r-right?” She looked pleadingly up at her husband, her voice shaking.

“I don’t know...” said Flio. “I’ll help of course, but for something on this scale it might take two or three days...maybe even a bit longer. It’s looking like we might have to postpone our hot springs trip...”

Rys’s expression was one of absolute despair. “I knew we should have killed that man...” she murmured through her clenched teeth.

◇Kinosaki Hot Springs Village—One Week Later◇

A week later, Flio and Rys returned to the Kinosaki Hot Springs. This time, they brought along Balirossa, Blossom, Byleri, Belano, and Hiya. For the past week, Flio and Rys had been healing people injured in the attack and helping with repairs. In thanks, the Kinosaki Hot Springs Association had offered them a free stay for their entire household.

“Our household is actually fairly large...” Flio had said, but the chairman of the association was insistent.

“As far as any of us are concerned,” they said, “anyone in your household is part of our family after all the help you’ve given us!”

And so, Flio brought all five along with himself and Rys. Rys had been unhappy at first, saying, “Are we not going to be alone together, then?” but she was mollified when she heard that she and her husband would be given a private room.

“It is a pity, though,” said Balirossa. “I had hoped that Sir Ghozal and Ser Uliminas would be able to join us...”

“It is too bad,” said Flio. “It sounds like there was some kind of emergency with one of Uliminas’s former subordinates...”

Blossom ran up to the pair, interrupting before Balirossa could respond. “Hey, Balirossa!” she said. “I thought you couldn’t stand Mister Ghozal! Don’t tell me you’re coming around?” She nudged her friend in the side with her elbow.

Balirossa’s face went bright red. “D-Don’t be absurd!” she stammered. “Of course not! I-I just, perhaps, we are after all living under the same roof, you see... At the very least I should show some concern for them!”

“Ohhh?” Blossom teased. “Is that really all that’s going on?”

“Hrm...” said Balirossa. “What exactly are you suggesting I feel then, Blossom?”

Byleri and Hiya joined in on pestering Balirossa as Belano silently poked her on her back. “O-Okay! That’s enough!” she said, covering her face with her hands and running off. “L-Leave me alooone!”

Flio draped his arm over Rys’s shoulders as she watched their antics with amusement. “Have the Silent Listeners been having trouble finding new employment...?” he wondered.

“So I have heard,” said Rys. “It sounds like people are slow to trust them since they have no personal history they can reveal.”

“If only they could use their demonic abilities openly... They’d have no trouble finding employment with that sort of demonstration. But right now they have to worry about being caught by Klyrode’s demon sensors. I might not be able to protect them if that happens...”

When Ghozal and Uliminas left the Dark Army, all thirty of the elite Silent Listeners who used to work as spies directly under Uliminas quit in a show of support for their commander. They took human forms and set out for human cities to try to find new employment, but nobody was willing to hire a stranger with an uncertain background.

Some time ago, the former King Klyrode, fed up with the Silent Listeners skulking around in his kingdom, issued a proclamation for shopkeepers not to employ anyone who couldn’t adequately prove their personal history owing to the possibility of spies. In a sense, then, the Silent Listeners were reaping what they had sown.

Flio rested his jaw in his hand, deep in thought. “My lord husband?” asked Rys, “what is the matter?”

“Oh, nothing,” he said. “I just have something on my mind...” He gave Rys one of his smiles. “It can wait until we get home. Today, let’s just enjoy the hot springs.”

“Okay!” Rys grinned back at her husband and the pair walked arm in arm into the village.

◇◇◇

Thanks in large part to Flio’s and Rys’s efforts, the village had been completely repaired. “Wow!” said Blossom, looking all around her. “A monster really tore this place apart a week ago? I would have never guessed.”

“Right?” said Byleri. “Like, there are tons of customers too... It’s hard to believe, y’know?” She was glancing around as well, taking in everything with wide, excited eyes.

“I can sense some lingering malicium,” said Hiya, “but even that is faint... The Exalted One and his wife were here, after all. It is no surprise to see such a thorough reconstruction. I am impressed as ever.” Hiya bowed deeply as they walked behind Flio.

“It was nothing, really,” said Flio, shaking his head. He couldn’t quite suppress a wry grin. “The people of Kinosaki did most of the work. Rys and I just helped.”

Rys gazed in admiration at Flio. Most of the demons I’ve known would have taken all the credit for themselves, she thought. My husband is so modest... He’s an amazing man. She gave Flio’s arm a squeeze, her cheeks reddening.

Belano was walking along in the middle of the group, looking around with a map open in her hands. She stopped and pointed out a large building in front of them. “That’s the inn,” she said in her usual small voice. Flio stopped and looked with her.

“It seems like a good place to stay,” said Rys. Everyone nodded. It was the biggest building around, and there was steam rising up everywhere. It truly looked like the very image of hot springs.

Flio and Rys led the rest into the building, where quite a number of workers were lined up in two lines on either side of them. “Welcome to Kinosaki!” they all said at once.

“Wow!” said Byleri. “Like, what are those clothes everyone’s wearing? I’ve never seen anything like them!”

“Those are kimono,” said Belano. “My colleague from the East wears them too.”

“Yeah? Kimono, huh?” Byleri nodded.

Flio’s party chattered among themselves as they looked all around. Then, a girl stepped out of the line in front of them and bowed. “Welcome again to Kinosaki Hot Springs,” she said. “Shall I show you to the front desk?”

“Thank you,” said Flio. “It’s good to be here.”

The girl led Flio and Rys along, the rest of them following close behind. “Please sign your name in the guest book,” she said, smiling coquettishly. Flio scribbled out their information with a pen. Rys, meanwhile, was fidgeting nervously. She gestured to the girl, beckoning her close. “Is there something you need, miss?”

“Yes, well... I was wondering if you could tell me something...” Rys cupped her hand around the girl’s ear to whisper. “Where is the spring that helps couples have children?” Her voice was quiet but extremely serious.

The girl smiled and nodded her head, and then took a map out from the sleeve of her kimono. She quietly handed it over and brought her own hand up to Rys’s ear to whisper back. “The childbirth spring is an outdoor bath,” she said. “That map will show you where to find it. I wish you luck.” She gave her a thumbs-up. Rys nodded seriously.

After Flio had finished recording everyone’s names in the guest book, he handed over his ticket. “There might be two more joining us later,” he said. “Their names are Ghozal and Ulimina—” the moment the words left his mouth, Rys rushed up to his side.

“My lord, have you finished? Shall we go to our room?” She was speaking fast, not letting Flio get a word in. “Come on, let’s go! Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!” She seized him by the arm and began to drag him off.

“Lord Flio!” cried Blossom. “Wait a moment!” She rushed after the pair, everyone else following. In her hurry, she bumped into a large man with reddish-black skin who seemed to be waiting for his turn at the front desk. “Oh! Sorry!” she said, lowering her head and raising her right arm in a gesture of apology.

The man, however, was angry when he looked at Blossom. “Hmmm?!” He reached out towards her.

“Wah?” Blossom was startled at his reaction and thoughtlessly started to bring her hands up to a guard.

“Wait.” A woman standing beside the big man put her hand on his and pushed it back down. With her other hand, she adjusted the glasses she was wearing. “Now, run.” she said.

“A-Aah! I’m so sorry!” Blossom bowed her head again and again and ran off down the hallway after Balirossa and the others.

The man clicked his tongue in irritation. “What was that, Phufun?!” he bellowed. “You’re letting that woman go?! A lower life-form like that deserves death for bumping into me!” Phufun pressed her finger against his lips, signaling him to keep quiet. “Ngh, wha?!”

“Master...” she said, “we didn’t come here to fight. Don’t lose sight of our objective...” Yuigarde’s anger didn’t seem to be abating, so Phufun leaned in to whisper. “Master,” she said, “listen. All of the top ranking members of the Dark Army are here, taking these loathsome human forms. All for the sake of Operation: Vacation. Our objective is to deepen the trust between the Dark One and the ranking officers and to raise the morale of their soldiers. Understand? If we start a fight and are kicked out of the inn, this mission will end in failure.”

“B-But,” stammered Yuigarde, “that’s so damn convoluted! We should just turn back into demons and conquer this village! Bring it under our control!”

“How many times must I tell you? This place... These hot springs, they call it, are in the south of Klyrode, on the opposite side of the Dark Citadel. If we conquered it, it wouldn’t take long for the Klyrode army to arrive. That’s why our primary objective here is morale and trust.”

“H-Hrm...”

“And these being human hot springs means everyone can cut loose, and not worry about rank or standing. So let’s just try to blend—”

“Um... Sir? Miss?” The two of them were pressing their heads close together, urgently whispering, when the girl from earlier spoke up.

The pair shot up at once. “Yes?!” they said, their voices cracking.

“U-Um, would you write your names in the guest book? There are people waiting behind you...”

“O-Oh, yes, I’m terribly sorry...” Phufun did her absolute best to keep calm, pressing her glasses up on the bridge of her nose as she turned to look at the front desk.

A little ways away stood a group watching Yuigarde and Phufun closely. These were the officers who had come to participate in Operation: Vacation. They had sealed their demonic abilities in order to fool the Magical Kingdom of Klyrode’s security and had taken human forms. It must be said, however, that the men in particular looked somewhat excessively burly. They looked very strange, looming over the inn lobby. They were certainly attracting attention.

“I have heard that thisss hot spring is good for the ssskin,” said Yorminyt of the Infernal Four. “I am mossst eager to sssee for myssself.” She nervously ran her hands over her cheeks and arms.

“And we can drink all we like!” said the Infernal Sleip with a hearty laugh. “I’m starting as soon as we get to our rooms.” He was drooling.

“Is the food good, yes? Yes, good food?” queried their colleague Hugi-Mugi. They were originally a two-headed doppeladler bird, but today they had taken the form of two humans. The two spoke as one. “We can eat much, yes? Fill our stomachs, yes? Yes, we are hungry!” They each placed an arm on the other’s shoulder and danced cheerfully in anticipation.

The rest of the officers were smiling happily, chattering and laughing and cheering, waiting for Yuigarde and Phufun to finish.

Meanwhile, Phufun was hovering in front of the guest book, racking her brains in clear agony. What name this time...? Of course, it wouldn’t do to write down the real names of the members of the Dark Army. Phufun had been writing down some human-sounding aliases, but after the sixteenth name she found that she couldn’t think of any more.

◇Somewhere in Kinosaki Village—Part 1◇

Hiya had left Flio’s company and gone to wander alone through the hot springs village. In their hand they held the guide map they had obtained from the inn’s front desk. They kept staring at a part of the map as they looked around. This building... The Museum of Erotic Art. If my information is correct, they have books and sculptures from around the world, ancient and modern, all pertaining to erotic practices. They have many rare items on display and in their collection. I would very much like to see them for myself.

Hiya, the djinn who commands the origin of light and darkness, had been alive for many, many years. They knew much of the history of the world and of magical lore, but only a little about sex. When they swore fealty to Flio and began to live with him, though, they found themself fascinated by Flio and Rys’s intimate love-making and became positively greedy for knowledge about sex and sexuality, which until now they had largely ignored.

“Shopkeeper,” they said, addressing someone behind the counter at a souvenir stand. “I wish to ask you a question. May I trouble you?”

“Hm? What is it?”

“I seek the building known as the ‘Museum of Erotic Art.’ Do you know where it is?”

As Hiya was asking for directions, they heard a voice behind them. “Like, um, excuse me? Do you know where this building is?”

“Oh!” said whoever the voice was talking to. “The Museum of Erotic Art?”

“Aah! You don’t have to, like, say it so loud?”

“That voice...” Hiya turned around. There, standing now in front of them, was Byleri. She had been asking directions from the stall opposite of them. Byleri’s face was red. She had been trying to ask without saying the building’s name, but the woman she was talking to had no reservations about blurting it out. “Oh?” said Hiya.

“Haweh?!” said Byleri. Hiya was mildly surprised to encounter Byleri here, but Byleri’s face became even redder. It was positively crimson.

“Miss Byleri,” Hiya said. “You seek the Museum of Erotic Art?”

“N-No! I, uh, I... I’m looking for, like, something else?”

“What strange happenstance,” they continued, unperturbed. “I, too, am bound for the Museum of Erotic Art.”

“You got it wrong!” said Byleri. “See, um... I, like...”

“Since we have found each other like this, shall we enjoy the Museum of Erotic Art together, until we are truly satisfied?”

“No! I, like... I can enjoy it myself? In secret? Oh, no, um, I mean...”

The two carried on like this for a while, until they learned that sadly, the museum was closed for the day.

◇Somewhere in Kinosaki Village—Part 2◇

Rys wasted no time. The second her luggage was in her room she hurried to change into the yukata that had been prepared for her. “My love! I’m going to the hot springs! The Yanagi Bath—the childbearing one!” She grabbed Flio by the hand and led him off, repeating those words like a mantra.

The Kinosaki Hot Springs contained seven springs, each with their own properties. The most famous attraction was the outdoor walking course, where guests could stroll from hot spring to hot spring. Rys headed directly for one of these: the Yanagi Bath. She had already started taking off her yukata as she approached.

“Okay!” she said. “Let’s go in, my love! Together! Let’s get all of the childbearing water we can!” She pulled her husband along with her into the women’s bath. The staff at the hot spring ran up to stop them, harried looks on their faces.

“E-Excuse me, miss? Sir?” said one attendant. “This isn’t mixed bathing... Could your husband please go to the men’s bath area?”

Rys turned towards the attendant, fury written on her face. “This is for my future happiness! If you dare to stand in my way—” There was a thunk. Flio had straightened his hand like a knife and struck Rys on the head in the middle of her sentence, sending her crumpling to the ground.

Flio turned to the staff, looking thoroughly mortified. “Sorry about all that,” he said. “We’ll follow the rules, so don’t worry.” He bowed his head several times. Then he turned to his wife. “Rys,” he said, “I understand how you feel, but you have to follow the rules. Now, I’ll go to the men’s bath, and you can go to the women’s. Okay?”

“Yes, my lord husband...” Rys mumbled. It seemed like she had recovered her consciousness after blacking out from Flio’s attack. “I apologize profusely...”

◇Kinosaki Hot Springs Village—Inn◇

“Oh, this is delicious!” Balirossa cried as she took a bite of the lunch the inn had provided for them.

“Yeah,” said Belano between bites of seafood. “It’s good.” Belano was usually a light eater, but here she was shoveling dish after dish into her mouth.

“The food’s great, but the drinks are something else,” said Blossom. She was drinking straight from the bottle and laughing boisterously next to them. There were five in total sharing the room: Balirossa, Blossom, Byleri, Belano, and Hiya. While the rest were out exploring the village, Balirossa, Blossom, and Belano had stayed behind for lunch.

“But you know,” Blossom continued, “with food this good, it’s a shame we didn’t bring Sybe along with us.” She looked wistful as she took a bite of grilled fish, her face red from the alcohol.

“Well,” said Balirossa, “Sybe is an animal. The inn has a strict policy on pets, I’m afraid. It simply wasn’t possible.” She reached out with her fork towards her small portable dining table, aiming for the dead center, but then she stopped, her eyes widening. “Hm? What happened to my egg rolls?”

“What do you mean ‘what happened’? Maybe you ate ’em all without thinking.”

“No, that can’t be! They looked so delicious, I had resolved to leave them for last.” She started picking up the plates on her table one at a time, looking under them as if she thought an egg roll might be hiding there somehow.

“Ah, well,” said Blossom. “Here, I’ll give you one of mine, so... Wait, what?” Blossom’s eyes went wide as well. She was certain she hadn’t eaten her egg rolls either, but they were nowhere to be seen.

“Oh,” said Belano, interrupting suddenly. She pointed at something underneath Blossom’s table. “What’s that?”

Blossom picked the table up. There, before their eyes, was Sybe. The unicorn rabbit was lying on its side, munching single-mindedly on an egg roll.

“Sybe...what are you doing here?” Blossom was puzzled. “Weren’t you watching the house while we...” she trailed off as her eyes landed on her own luggage. One of the bags was open. Blossom furrowed her brow. “Did you sneak into my luggage, Sybe...?”

Sybe ignored her and continued to eat.

Blossom, Balirossa, and Belano took Sybe to the landlady to explain the situation and apologize.

“Make sure it stays in your room,” the landlady said. “We don’t want to let it bother the other guests.”

And so Sybe was allowed to stay with just the one condition.

◇The Inn—Banquet Hall◇

The demons from the Dark Army who had come to participate in the hot springs party were staying in the banquet hall of the inn. The hope was that by eating and sleeping together, they would be able to deepen their bonds of friendship. Lunch had started as soon as they arrived, but...

“If you do that again,” said the landlady, her smile as cold as ice, “you are to leave my inn immediately. Am I understood?” The officers of the Dark Army with Yuigarde at their head were sitting on their knees with their heads lowered, looking thoroughly chastised.

To learn what had happened, we must go back in time to when the Dark Army first arrived. They had immediately descended on the food and began to eat.

Yuigarde was eating happily. “Well!” he exclaimed. “Human food isn’t half bad, is it!” as he spoke, he brought a bottle to his lips to drink.

“Yesss, indeed,” said Yorminyt. “Their liquor isss quite good as well.” She sighed contentedly. She was wearing her yukata half-open, her body hot from the alcohol. A number of the demons around her were staring, unable to look away from her voluptuous figure.

“We need more drinks!” Sleip bellowed as he finished off his tenth bottle. “We need a cask! Bring us a cask! Gwah ha ha ha ha!”

“Hooray! Food, yes! Drink, yes! Yes, delicious!” Next to Sleip, Hugi-Mugi’s two bodies were positively inhaling food and alcohol, alternating which one was drinking and which was eating.

Spirits were high with Yuigarde and the three surviving Infernals. And how could they not be, with such delicious food and such good drinks? They poured drinks for each other, ate to their hearts’ content, and made merry. Perhaps they were being somewhat too noisy, but on the whole it had the atmosphere of a good party.

Suddenly, Yuigarde took to his feet. He was completely and utterly drunk. “Now this is a feast!” he cried. “Entertainment! Someone give us a show! Let’s get things going!” He gave a loud, boisterous laugh.

One of the officers sprung to his feet. “By your leave, allow me!” he said, and began a strange, writhing dance.

Yuigarde’s demeanor suddenly flipped. No longer laughing, he looked sternly at the dancing officer. “What’s that ugly dance supposed to be?!” he snapped. “It just looks like you got your magic sucked out! Show me something better!” The Dark One picked up a bottle that had fallen by his feet and tossed it violently at the demon. It struck him in the face and shattered.

Shards of broken glass were stuck in the officer’s face, the dregs of alcohol that had been left in the bottle running down his chin. “That hurts, you son of a bitch!” he shouted, and charged straight for Yuigarde.

Yuigarde was indignant. “Hmmm? How dare you speak that way to me?! I’m the Dark One!”

“Who cares?!” he shot back. “I ain’t afraid of you!” He reached out to grab at Yuigarde.

“And who are you?!” Yuigarde’s arm shot out, clutching at the demon’s throat. “I’ll teach you to fear me!” The two suddenly started grappling, tumbling and rolling and struggling all through the room.

“No! My drinksss!”

“You lowlifes! You knocked over my cask!”

“Ah! You stepped on us, yes! Yes, we have been stepped on! This will not stand, yes!”

As the two grappled their way through the crowded banquet hall, more and more victims cried out as they trampled on their meals and knocked over their drinks. Enraged, the rest of the demons joined the brawl. It was a scene that would not have been out of place in the pits of Hell itself. The brawl quickly overstepped its bounds. Not only did they demolish their own room, but another banquet room on the same floor fell victim to their rampage.

When she heard the commotion, the landlady of the inn called for security and went with them to suppress the fight. The inn’s security force of mostly demihumans were pressed to handle the situation, but they managed to get the brawl under control and obtained an account of what had happened.

And now the landlady stood staring at the Dark Army, Yuigarde at the front. They were sitting quietly like school children. She gave them another icy smile. “We will charge you for repairs and for bothering the other guests when you leave. See that it doesn’t happen again, or else you are no longer welcome here.” With that last stern reminder, she left the room.

Yuigarde stared out the door after her. “She’s pretty tough, that woman...” he said. Before the landlady’s wrath, Yuigarde had found himself making his big body as small as possible, nervous sweat running down his face.

The door opened again, and Phufun entered. For a second, she froze, her eyes darting around the banquet hall. “What... What in the hells happened while I was using the toilet?!” She surveyed the broken room and the officers of the Dark Army kneeling quietly, and with a shaking hand, she pressed her glasses up on the bridge of her nose.

◇The Yanagi Bath◇

The day was coming to a close. The sun had started to sink beyond the horizon. Rys, who had come into the bath at noon, was still soaking in the water. She had gone back to the inn at one point to eat lunch with Flio, but the moment she had finished her food, she dashed out and came back to the bath as fast as she could.

“Babies... Babies... My husband’s precious babies...” She was chanting those words under her breath, her eyes closed as she soaked in the bath. She was visualizing herself as a mother. In her imagination, she had just given birth to her second set of triplets and was being congratulated by Flio and her older children. Her jaw was slack as she sat there, lost in her reverie imagining her rose-tinted image of the future. She didn’t show any sign of ever getting up.

Flio was in the waiting area, sitting on a chair. He was starting to get tired. He glanced in the direction of the women’s baths. “I guess Rys still isn’t done...” Grimacing, he slowly took to his feet and made his way to the men’s side of the bath. “Well then, I guess I’d better get back in. Gotta keep her company.”

◇Kinosaki Hot Springs Village—Inn◇

“If it isn’t Ghozal! And Uliminas?” Flio had returned to the inn to find Ghozal and Uliminas standing by the entryway. He greeted them happily.

“Mister Flio!” said Ghozal when he noticed them. “And Rys! Good to see you!” Flio and Ghozal shared a friendly smile. Uliminas, who had been clinging to Ghozal’s arm, quickly let go and stepped away. Rys grinned at her behavior.

“Oh, don’t mind us, Uliminas,” she said. “If you care for Ghozal, it’s no problem at all if you—”

Uliminas went red and pressed Ghozal’s ears shut with her hands. “I-I-I-I-I-I-I—” she stammered, loudly.

“Fool!” Ghozal scowled. “Don’t be so loud! You’ll bother people!”

Uliminas deflated. “Meow... I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” said Ghozal. “Just be careful.” He grabbed Uliminas’s shoulder and pulled her back in close. Then he turned to look at Flio and Rys. “We’re done with our business, more or less, so here we are. I hope it’s no trouble.”

“Not at all!” said Flio. “I’m glad your business went well!”

Flio gave them a big smile, but Ghozal and Uliminas looked glum. “Hrm,” said Ghozal. “Well, I wouldn’t exactly say it went well.”

“There’s meowlways next time...” said Uliminas.

Ghozal and Uliminas had told Flio before they left that they were going to help Uliminas’s former subordinates, the Silent Listeners, with their re-employment. I guess it’s not going great, Flio thought. He chided himself for carelessly assuming it had gone well. He grew lost in his thoughts. He lowered his head, bringing his hand up to rest on his jaw.

“My husband?” Rys looked over at Flio, tilting her neck curiously. “Is something the matter?”

Flio nodded to himself, and then looked up at Rys. “No, I’m all right, Rys,” he said. “Thanks for worrying about me.”

“Truly? Then, I suppose that is fine...”

Flio and Rys continued to talk as they led Ghozal and Uliminas inside to the front desk of the inn. “Excuse me,” said Flio, “we’d like to rent another room...”

The girl behind the desk looked contrite. “Oh... I’m terribly sorry, but there was a bit of trouble earlier. We don’t have any more rooms available...”

“Trouble?” asked Flio.

“Yes... There was a bit of a commotion on the banquet hall floor... Unfortunately, the rooms on that floor aren’t in usable condition right now. We had to move all of the guests staying there to rooms on other floors, you see...”

“Okay, I understand,” said Flio. “Sorry to bother you.” He stepped away from the desk when suddenly he heard a loud voice behind him.

“That’s it! Leave, and don’t come back!” A woman Flio took to be the landlady was facing the entryway, her kimono sleeves tucked up, screaming furiously. She was surrounded on all sides not only by the inn’s security, but by the village’s guards. The landlady and security were forcing a great number of guests out of the inn one after another.

Outside, Flio could hear a man’s deep voice. “Shaddap! I’m the one canceling my reservation!”

The woman swung her arms in a rage. “Boulders! Hit them with every boulder you have!”

“Yes, ma’am!” A number of the demihuman guards were carrying large boulders, which they hurled out the door with all the strength they could muster. A chorus of screams and protests came from outside.

“That hurtsss! I can’t fight properly in thisss body!”

“Wretch! Just let me have a bit more to drink!”

“It hurts, yes! Yes, it hurts!”

Eventually, the voices grew quiet. The last they could hear was the first man shouting from afar, “I’ll remember this!”

When they were gone, the landlady let down her sleeves. “Now,” she ordered the guards again, “go tidy up the front of the inn. I expect it to be immaculate!”

“Yes, ma’am!” At her instructions, the guards took up brooms and trash bags and rushed outside to begin cleaning up. The landlady sighed.

“Honestly,” she murmured, clearly deeply annoyed, “those have got to be the worst guests we’ve ever had...to think they’d start not one but two drunken brawls...” Then she noticed Flio standing in the middle of the room, staring at the commotion. She quickly brought her kimono sleeve up to cover her face. “O-Oh, goodness me, sir! I’m afraid I made you see something dreadful!” She affected a high, feminine laugh as she walked up to Flio and his party. “Was there something our special guests needed?” she asked the troubled-looking girl at the front desk.

“Oh, y-yes!” she said. “More of their party arrived, and they were asking if there was another room available...”

The landlady clapped her hands. “Well, that’s just perfect! As of this moment we have a number of empty rooms on the third floor, if you’ll follow me.” Then she leaned in close to Flio’s face, and whispered. “And in exchange for this little favor, do keep what you saw just now between us, will you?” Flio nodded, a dry smile on his face.

Next to Flio, Ghozal, Uliminas and Rys were staring at the door. “Those people...” said Ghozal.

“It felt like I recognized them somemeow...” said Uliminas. “Like they were people I used to see meowll the time...”

“How strange, Uliminas,” said Rys. “I had the same thought.”

The three demons looked between each other. “Well,” said Rys, “the only thing we’re here for today is the hot springs.”

“You’re right,” said Uliminas. “Purrobably best to purrtend we didn’t notice.”

“Hrm. Very well,” said Ghozal. “I don’t know what their plans are, but if they cause problems here I can deal with it then.” All three nodded emphatically.

“Hey you three,” Flio called to them, “the room’s ready!”

“Yes, my lord husband! I’m coming!” Rys ran up to her husband as Ghozal and Uliminas followed along behind.

The next day, portraits of the offenders were sent to every inn in Kinosaki Village, with instructions to not let the people depicted lodge in any inn in town. Nobody had any idea, however, that they had been the Dark One himself and the ranking officers of the Dark Army.

◇Kinosaki Hot Springs Village◇

With Ghozal and Uliminas now among their numbers, Flio and his companions finished up their dinners in the great hall and headed out once more. Only Blossom stayed behind in the room to keep an eye on Sybe. Rys took the lead and led the party to one outdoor bath in particular.

Flio grimaced when he saw where they had ended up. Rys had brought them to the Yanagi bath—the bath for couples hoping for children—as if it were the most obvious and natural thing in the world. Rys signed herself in as fast as she could and was naked and in the bath before anyone could get a word in. Once again she started to mutter, “Babies... Babies... My husband’s precious babies,” visualizing her success in her mind.

“So this is what mew call a hot spring?” Uliminas looked around curiously at her surroundings as she went to the changing room and took off her clothes.

“Is this your first time, Ser Uliminas?” asked Balirossa.

“Yeah. I’ve heard of hot springs, but there aren’t any around the Dark Citadel. And I’m not a big fan of baths in the furrst place.” Uliminas kept watching Balirossa out of the corner of her eye as the two changed. She has a nicer body than I expected... she thought, seething internally just a little. And her face is something else. Dammewt, no wonder Ghozal is so head over heels.

Just as she was thinking that, Ghozal appeared suddenly in front of her eyes. Ghozal, who by all appearances had just teleported onto the scene, held his right hand out. “There you are, Uliminas,” he said. “I think I forgot my towel. Give me another.” He was stark naked. The women, who would not have expected Ghozal to suddenly materialize in their wildest dreams, were mostly naked themselves.

It took Uliminas a little while to wrap her head around what was happening. After a moment of staring blankly, she grabbed her own towel from the basket and half-tossed it onto Ghozal’s face. She jumped up on his shoulders and wrapped the towel tight around his eyes like a blindfold. “Get back to the men’s bath, you mewscreant!” she shouted, launching off his shoulders with a kick.

“Hrm,” he said. “Pardon me.” Ghozal, acting like Uliminas’s anger had nothing to do with him, laughed and vanished from the spot as suddenly as he came.

There were other women in the changing room, but because Ghozal had gone so quickly, nobody was quite sure what had happened.

“Wasn’t there a man standing there?” asked one woman.

“I don’t see a man...” replied another.

Uliminas, for her part, led the party into the bath, acting for all the world like nothing had happened. I am going to KILL that man, she thought, grinding her teeth.

“Ghozal,” said Flio, “the baths are split into male and female sections. You gotta watch out for that.”

“I see, so that’s what all the fuss was about. I’ve never been somewhere like this, you know.” Ghozal laughed heartily at his mistake as he got in the bath next to Flio, one hand behind his head in an expression of mild contrition.

They soaked in the bath until they had had enough, and later met back up in the waiting area outside the changing rooms. “Mewncompoop!” Uliminas shouted when she saw Ghozal, kicking him again and again as she scolded him. “What made you do something that stupid?! I’ll kill mew!”

It was hard to tell from Ghozal’s expression if he understood what he had done wrong. He kept lightly apologizing, laughing the whole time. “Yeah, sorry, sorry, my bad.”

Rys, incidentally, was left behind in the bath, still soaking. In her mind, she was already on her fifteenth child.

“This is great though,” said Ghozal, grinning as the Far Eastern geta sandals he had been given to wear clopped on the pavement. “Going around to different hot springs like this... This is the life.” His grinning face showed no trace at all of the Dark One he had once been.

Uliminas looked at Ghozal’s face, her own expression complicated. He never made a face like that when he was the Dark Meown... she thought. He always looked so serious... Intense, even... Uliminas had nothing but respect for Gholl the Dark One. She had just about worshipped him. He had been ever proud, ever strong, ever becoming of his station. It had been that Gholl that Uliminas had fallen in love with. She had been overjoyed whenever Gholl had ordered her to attend him for the night, but as his vassal, she kept those feelings buried deep, taking care to never let them show on her face.

I miss those days when Gholl was the Dark Meown... Uliminas turned her head again to look intensely at him. He was grinning happily with his whole face. But this new cheerful Ghozal isn’t bad either... Slowly, Uliminas too began to smile.

“Oh, Ser Balirossa,” said Ghozal, suddenly breaking Uliminas out of her reverie. “Your bath-soaked skin shines so beautifully!”

“Huh?!” Balirossa started in confusion, her face quickly turning red. “Wh-What brought this on?!” Ghozal kept smiling at her as she struggled to control herself.

That meathead! Uliminas stomped on Ghozal’s foot and glared at him. Ghozal looked surprised more than anything as she stomped and stomped, her cheeks puffed out indignantly.

“Hey, hey! What’s gotten into you, Uliminas?!”

“Mew knows! Think it over meowrself!”

Afterwards, Flio and company went around one at a time to the other six outdoor hot springs in the village. Ghozal kept in mind what he had been taught about men’s and women’s changing areas and was careful not to cause any more scenes. When they finished bathing they met up with Rys, who had stayed in the Yanagi bath right up until closing time, and together they all headed back to the inn.

“Hey! Welcome back!” Blossom, whom they had left standing watch, had just gotten into the small indoor bath in their room when they arrived. This bath was set on the veranda, so in a way it was also an outdoor bath. Sybe, in its unicorn rabbit form, was in the bath with her.

“Hey, Blossom? Are we allowed to, like, let Sybe in the bath?”

“Yeah, I checked with the landlady when she came to bring us drinks. She said it was okay!” Blossom pointed to the middle of the room where a prodigious number of bottles and snack foods were set out. It seemed Blossom had ordered them so that the rest of the party could indulge when they got back from the baths.

“Well, like, that’s great then!” Byleri’s words made Blossom grin happily. Next to her, Sybe pulled itself onto the rim of the bathtub with its two forepaws, shaking itself dry.

“Right!” called Ghozal. “Now that we’re back, let’s get to drinking!” He grabbed a bottle from the offering in the middle of the room.

“Yes, after all, Blossom went to the trouble of—” Rys cut herself off. Flio, who was sitting next to Ghozal, had reached out to grab a bottle. “Oh, my lord husband, allow me.” She pulled his hand away and grabbed a cup and a bottle herself, placing the cup in his hand and pouring a drink for him with a smile on her face. “Here, my lord.”

“Thank you, Rys. Here, I’ll pour you a cup too.” Flio took the bottle from his wife and brought it to her own cup to pour, smiling back at her.

“Why, thank you!” said Rys, still beaming.

Belano, who had been sitting across from Flio and Rys, started to blush as she watched. “They really are great together...” she muttered, guzzling down her own cup.

“Yeah...” said Byleri, beaming at the couple. “They’re, like, amazing? Like, I wanna be like that with my husband someday, y’know?” She took a deep drink herself.

“I see,” said Hiya, who was standing behind Byleri and openly staring. “Then the book in your possession was for—”

“Hiya!” Byleri covered their mouth with both hands, her face quite red. “Like, not another word, okay? A-Anyway, like, drink with us! Maybe drink enough to forget all about that book...” Byleri forced a cup into Hiya’s hands and started to pour them a drink.

Hiya smirked at Byleri’s behavior. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” they said. “A wife’s duties are quite important, Miss Byleri. For you to have taken such an interest—”

“Drink! Drink! You, like, haven’t had enough, Hiya! You gotta drink more!” Byleri held the bottle up in front of Hiya, interrupting and hurrying the djinn on.

Ghozal, sitting across from Byleri and Hiya, drained his cup with a single gulp. “Hrm,” he said. “Demon liquor is the best, but the stuff humans make isn’t half bad.”

“One hundred purrcent,” said Uliminas. Her face was already red from inebriation as she drained her cup. She and Ghozal were both extremely heavy drinkers, practically inhaling the stuff.

Next to Ghozal, directly across Uliminas, Balirossa sat putting just a little distance between herself and the former Dark One, her back curled up, staring at the ground and trying to be as small as possible as she nibbled on snacks. Her cheeks were red. Why did I sit here? I just can’t bring myself to relax next to Sir G-Ghozal...

“Aaah, what a bath!” Blossom, who had come out of the bath on the veranda, came up next to Balirossa. She was already very drunk after having a few drinks during her bath. Her face was ruddy and she had neglected both to tie the belt of her yukata and to put on her underwear. Each step she took left her yukata wide open, her naked lower body fully visible.

Balirossa blushed redder when she noticed Blossom’s state of undress. She took her friend’s yukata in her hands and shut it, tying it as tight as she could. “Wh-What are you doing! Sir Ghozal and Sir Flio are here! You shouldn’t display yourself in such a way even to members of your own sex!”

“Aha ha,” Blossom laughed, “what’s the big deal? You’re too stiff sometimes, Balirossa.” As she spoke, Blossom lay on her side, resting her head on Balirossa’s lap.

“H-Hey! Excuse me?!” exclaimed Balirossa.

Blossom paid no heed to Balirossa’s protests. “Hey, hey, seriously, don’t worry about it!” she said as she started to doze off using Balirossa as a pillow. Sybe, who had also gotten out of the bath, ran up to them and plopped down on top, resting on Blossom’s stomach.

Ghozal looked over at the pile and frowned. “What’s going on over there?” he asked.

“O-Oh!” Balirossa responded, somehow growing even redder. “It’s just bonding, I suppose! Or horseplay, perhaps... See Blossom?” she added in an aside to the woman on her lap. “Even Ghozal’s astonished at your behavior!”

“Hrm,” said Ghozal, nodding his head. “Bonding, is it...? Perhaps I should try it. Uliminas, I’ll borrow your lap.” He lay down without missing a beat, resting his head on Uliminas’s lap.

“Meow? Wha—” Uliminas blushed in confusion at Ghozal’s sudden behavior. “Wait! What is wrong with mew?! There’s horseplay and then there’s horseplay!” She punched the much larger man in the face as hard as she could. Even in a human body, however, Ghozal’s toughness was legendary. Her fists did absolutely nothing. No matter how hard she punched, he wouldn’t move an inch.

“Hrm. This is actually pretty comfortable,” said Ghozal. “Aha ha ha ha!”

“Just do what mew like,” Uliminas spat. “I don’t care.” She took another bottle and drained it almost instantly.

Rys, who had been staring at Uliminas and Ghozal, put a hand on her husband’s shoulder. “Shall we follow suit, my love?” she said, gesturing towards her own lap.

“Well...are you sure? I don’t want to bother anyone.”

“I’m sure. Everyone else is doing it, after all.” She smiled, her cheeks red.

“A-All right,” said Flio, also blushing a little as he placed his head down on Rys’s lap. “I guess there’s no reason not to...”

Rys adjusted her legs to make sure Flio wasn’t uncomfortable, and began to gently stroke his hair as he lay in her lap. “My lord husband... I hope you are enjoying yourself?”

“I am,” he said, smiling up at her. “I’m a little embarrassed, but it is nice...”

Belano and Byleri shared a look. “They’re so intimate...” mused Belano. “I’m a bit jealous.”

“Like, me too? I want a husband who makes me wanna do stuff like that, y’know?” The two stood up and began to head in the direction of the veranda.

“Oh? Where are you going?” Hiya called after them, sipping a cup of alcohol.

Byleri and Belano both turned their heads at once. “The bath,” said Belano.

“Like, I wanna try the bath here, y’know? I can’t deal with all this stuff.”

The two took off their yukatas and got in the bath that Blossom and Sybe had just vacated.

“Well, I suppose that’s one way to relieve tension,” said Hiya, smiling with the corner of their mouth as they stared at the pair.

Hiya could hear a woman’s voice in their head. Perhaps you’d like to use my lap too, Your Divinity.

Hah. Damalynas, they responded, perhaps I will, later.

Excellent! Hiya could feel the happy anticipation in Damalynas’s voice.

Damalynas, known as the Grand Magus of Midnight, was once defeated by Hiya and absorbed into their mental world. They had begun using her as a training partner in that world in the interest of satisfying their intellectual curiosity (primarily as pertains to sex). At first they had forced her, but over time, Damalynas had come to enjoy her role as Hiya’s loyal servant.

Flio looked around the room, his head resting in Rys’s lap. Ghozal, he saw, had moved his head to Balirossa’s lap and was smiling happily. Blossom and Sybe were cuddling on Uliminas’s. Uliminas’s fists were clenched, but she was giggling. Belano and Byleri were happily humming some tune together in the bath while Hiya leaned against the wall, smiling vacantly. Everyone seemed to be having a good time.

“I’m glad that everyone can have fun together like this sometimes,” he said.

“Me too.” Rys nodded. “It’s a good thing.” Then she brought her own face close to Flio’s. “But, my lord husband, I’m also looking forward to our time alone. I have taken a considerable amount of the childbearing water...” She gave him a flirtatious grin.

The following morning the group met up with Flio and Rys, who had gone to their private room to sleep, and went to the inn’s front desk to check out.

Rys was beaming next to Flio as he wrote their information in the guest book. “I had a wonderful time, my lord husband. We must come again.”

Behind the couple, Uliminas was clinging to Ghozal’s arm, her legs wobbling unsteadily. “Honestly,” said Ghozal, “if your legs are falling asleep...next time, tell me!” Last night, Ghozal had ended up falling asleep on Uliminas’s lap where he had lain until morning. Uliminas was forced to stay kneeling with her legs tucked under her until her legs fell asleep so badly that she couldn’t walk.

“Y-Yeah?! And mew’s fault is that?! Huh?!” Uliminas’s face was red from embarrassment. She punched Ghozal’s arm with all her strength, but Ghozal, who boasted the most durable body of all demonkind, just laughed, unperturbed by her attack.

“Ahh,” Blossom sighed. “I haven’t been this hungover in a while...”

“You as well, Blossom?” said Balirossa. “Alas, I fear that I might be hungover as well.”

“Yeah? Like, even Balirossa, huh?” said Byleri. “It feels like there’s a whole parade in my head...”

Belano moaned and said nothing. She was clutching her aching head. All four of them were plainly hungover, massaging their foreheads or temples and moaning pitifully.

“My, my,” said Hiya. “The four of you still need training.” They cradled Sybe in their arms and smiled.

Damalynas spoke in Hiya’s mind. I-I’m very sorry, Your Divinity, for being unable to see your training through to the end...

Oh, no, Damalynas, Hiya responded. You were quite adorable last night.

Hee hee... I-I was?

Distracted by the conversation with Damalynas, Hiya went silent, smiling absently. In their arms Sybe was wiggling its ears, happy to have been given all the egg rolls it could eat for breakfast that morning.

Finally, Flio returned. “Well, that’s done with. Ready to head back?” Everyone nodded in unison and they left the inn, the landlady and the workers waving them goodbye. After walking for a ways, Flio raised his right arm and conjured a magic circle. A second, larger magic circle appeared on the ground, and from it, a magic door. Flio opened the door and everyone could see the familiar sight of home on the other side. They went through single file, Flio at the head, and returned home from their vacation.

◇Houghtow City—Flio’s House◇

A few days after the hot springs vacation, a mysterious wooden crate appeared in the kitchen. “Rys, what are these yellow fruits?” Flio asked when he looked inside. It was packed full of a fruit he had never seen before.

Rys grinned. “My lord husband,” she said, “these are called lembons, famed for their acidity.”

“Acidity? So they’re sour fruits? Not for dessert, I’m guessing. What are you making?”

Rys shook her head. “I’m afraid you are mistaken, my lord husband. We may have a need for them in the near future, so I thought it wise to have them on hand.” A blush crept onto her cheeks. “You see, um, I read in a book that p-pregnant women sometimes have cravings for sour foods, so—” Rys swallowed the words that were on the tip of her tongue.

“So you thought it would be a good way to tell if you were pregnant, waiting to see if you started to crave lembons,” Flio said, smirking. “I... I see.”

“I bathed in so much of the childbirth water, and you’ve doted on me so much, I must be... Hee hee.” Rys grinned and giggled, and the two kept on talking.