Chapter 5: Flio Goes to the Mountains

◇The Alips Mountains◇

Flio and his family were at the Alips Mountains, far to the north of the Magical Kingdom of Klyrode. Rys looked around at the field of white snow piled high, a look of awe on her face. “So this is snow!” she marveled. Rys had abandoned her usual dress for cold weather gear, but she still looked pretty cute.

“Is this your first time seeing snow, Rys?” Flio asked.

“Yes,” she said. “I’d heard rumors, but this is my first time seeing it with my own eyes.” Those same eyes were shining with delight as she took in the view.

“Wow!” Elinàsze exclaimed. “Snow!” She was clinging to Flio’s arm, beaming widely.

“Look, Big Sis Wyne!” said Garyl. “Snow!”

“Look, Gare-Gare!” said Wyne. “Snow!” The two grinned at each other and jumped towards one of the snowbanks. Sybe, as a horned rabbit, was one step behind them, snuffling happily. The three leapt into the snow with their arms outstretched. Later, they laughed and laughed about the body-shaped holes they left in the mounds of snow.

Flio’s household had come to the mountains on vacation, on the invitation of the Maiden Queen. He had received a letter from Her Majesty which read: “Dear Lord Flio, I have been overjoyed of late to hear of the birth of your children. If it should please you, I would like to offer an invitation to use the Klyrode Castle Resort Spa, located in the Alips Mountains. Please enjoy the winter mountains to your hearts’ content.”

Flio had accepted the invitation gladly. He had just now arrived by Teleportation. Everyone was there, except for Blossom, who was still busy with farm work, and Belano, who had a class to teach.

“I’ll never understand you humans,” Ghozal said, folding his arms as he glanced in the direction of the mountains. “What, exactly, is fun about playing in the snow in this cold weather?”

Dotting the mountains before them was a great number of lodges, and on the slopes in front of the buildings, there were humans and demihumans sliding down the snow on thin boards strapped to their feet—a game known as skiing. Others were coming down the mountains in wooden constructs known as sleds or pelting each other with snowballs. “What do you think, Uliminas?” Ghozal asked, turning to the hellcat beside him.

But Uliminas didn’t respond. Or rather, she couldn’t. From her head to her feet she was covered in layer after layer of clothing to such an absurd degree that she looked, more than anything, like a snowman. Her face, too, was wrapped in several scarves. It sounded like she was trying to say something, but her voice was too muffled to make out.

“Uliminas...” Ghozal said. “Could it be...you don’t handle the cold well?” Uliminas gave a small nod. Uliminas was a hellcat, after all. Cold was one of her biggest weaknesses.

“I wanna go home and curl up under a warm blanket...” she mumbled to herself.

“Can you even walk in all those clothes?” Ghozal marveled. “Well, let’s try to get you to this ‘resort spa’ that the Maiden Queen mentioned as soon as we can.” He gave Uliminas a friendly smack on the shoulder, but the force caused her to lose her balance! She rolled and rolled on ahead, picking up speed as she dropped down the slope.

“Whoa!” said Ghozal. “So that’s it! Rolling down the mountain, eh? That looks fun!”

“No, Mister Ghozal!” Flio shouted. “She’s falling!” He flew down the slope after the swiftly rolling Uliminas.

◇Alips Mountains—Resort Spa◇

Flio had managed to rescue Uliminas before she came to any harm. Right now, she was sitting next to the fireplace, doing everything she could to warm her frozen body.

“Well whaddya know!” Ghozal said, chuckling, and covered in snow. “That was pretty fun!” He had thought Uliminas rolling down the mountain looked like a grand old time and curled up into a ball so he could roll down the hill himself. Ghozal was an enormous man, so he picked up incredible speed as he rolled down the slope.

The other visitors had watched him streak past in distress and confusion.

“Who is that man...?”

“Is he some kind of weirdo?”

Ghozal had paid them no mind as he rolled and rolled, laughing the whole time.

He’s a little kid, Uliminas thought as she watched by the fire. He’s just an enormeows little kid.

“Oh! Uliminas!” Sleip noticed what she was doing and called out to her, a sympathetic smile on his face. “If you’re so cold, perhaps you should take a spell in the bath!” It looked like he and Byleri had just arrived from outside.

Dalc Horst and Greanyl, incidentally, were busy with their shipments and espionage missions and weren’t participating in the trip.

“Bring the bath over here and I’ll get in it,” Uliminas said, not moving an inch from the fireplace.

“This cat...” A very wet Ghozal sighed, shaking his head and picking up Uliminas with one hand.

“Meowr?! Wait! C-Cold! It’s fureezing!”

“You’ll warm up real quick in the bath,” Ghozal said, peeling layer after layer of clothing off her with his free hand. It didn’t seem to occur to him that they were still in the middle of the lobby.

Uliminas flushed red and fought to keep Ghozal from taking off more clothes. “Meowron! Nincompoop! Don’t strip me in front of everymeown!”

“You wanna be clothed in the bath?” Ghozal asked.

“That’s not it!” Uliminas spat. “I can take off my clothes on my meown!”

“Ha ha ha! Look, don’t worry about it! C’mon! Maybe Ser Balirossa will get in with us!” Ghozal effortlessly blocked Uliminas’s flailing attacks and looked over at Balirossa.

Balirossa turned bright red. “What?” she said, waving her arms in a flustered panic and raising her voice to a falsetto. “I-I-I don’t... I mean...”

“Meaning...” Uliminas said. “That mew were planning to get in with me?” She gave Balirossa a glance.

Balirossa stopped moving. For a second, she seemed to be considering what to do. “Oh!” she said, finally. “I-I-I suppose, if Ser Uliminas were to...to be there...” She was red all the way up to her ears.

The three had been spending a lot of time together ever since the incident the other day with the djinn from the Dark World. Uliminas and Balirossa had had a private conversation, but they were still keeping what they had said a secret, even from Ghozal. Whatever it was, they were getting along a lot better. The three disappeared into the family bath behind the lobby.

“I suspect we won’t be able to use the bath for a while,” Flio said as he watched them leave, “wouldn’t you say so, Mister Sleip?”

“Yes, yes. They’ll be busy for hours.” The two smirked.

“My lord husband,” Rys said as she walked up, “there is another bath, it seems.” She showed him the map in the guidebook she had found in a corner of the room.

“Oh! So there is. It looks like there’s an open-air bath in addition to the family bath Mister Ghozal and the girls are using.” Flio stood up and followed the directions in the guidebook through the hallways until they reached a large open-air bath. It was enclosed by a veranda and a high wall so as to not be visible from the outside.

“It’s a very lovely view,” Rys said, shivering as she stepped out into the open air, “but it’s a little too cold for me...”

“Shall I cast a barrier then?” Flio offered. He held out his hand and a barrier appeared around the veranda, protecting it from the cold. “How’s that?”

“This is much better, thank you,” Rys said, smiling and nodding. And so their family entered the open-air bath.

“First!” Wyne shouted, tossing off her clothes and leaping into the bath with tremendous force. Splash! A plume of spray rose up as Wyne entered the hot water. “Pwaaah!” she exclaimed, reemerging on the surface.

“Me too! Me too!” Garyl ran ahead.

“Garyl, no!” Rys caught him seconds before he reached the bath. “Wyne,” she said, “don’t do that again. Do you understand me?”

Wyne giggled. “Sorry, mama,” she said, lowering her head...but also sticking out her tongue.

Wyne had lost her parents at an early age, and had grown up without anyone to call a family. After Flio and Rys took her in, she became attached to them as if they were her biological parents. Even when the couple had kids of their own, Wyne was nothing but overjoyed, doting on the children constantly.

Rys, of course, was well aware of all that. “Just as long as we understand each other,” she said, rinsing herself in hot water before entering the tub and sitting down next to her adopted daughter.

Wyne giggled and gave Rys a big hug. “I love you, mama,” she said.

Flio was behind them, watching the scene play out when Elinàsze scampered up. “Papa,” she said, “I’ll wash your back for you.”

Flio smiled. “No, you go ahead and get in the bath,” he said. “Your papa can wash himself, you know.”

“But I wanna wash you!” Elinàsze tugged on his arm.

In the end, Elinàsze wore Flio down and dragged him off to the washing area together. She lathered up a washcloth and rubbed it vigorously up and down Flio’s back, chanting, “Scrub! Scrub! Scrub!”

“Dada!” Wyne said. “Let me help!” She got out of the bath and ran over to Flio.

“Oh, Wyne, there’s really no need to—”

“But I wanna wash you too!”

And so Wyne and Elinàsze both ended up washing Flio’s back together, chanting together, “Scrub! Scrub! Scrub!” Flio couldn’t help but smile.

“I would like to offer to wash your back as well,” Rys said, approaching him with a smile on her face, “but you seem quite occupied.”

“Then I’ll wash daddy’s hair!” declared Garyl.

“H-Hold on!” Flio protested. “Isn’t this going a bit—”

“No, no, let me do it!” Garyl took the bottle of shampoo and lathered a generous helping into Flio’s scalp. It was far too much shampoo, and before long, Flio’s hair was covered in a layer of soapy bubbles. Flio used a magic barrier to keep it from getting in his eyes.

Magic comes in handy at the oddest of times, doesn’t it, Flio thought, grimacing as Garyl roughly worked the shampoo in his hair, heedless of his father’s face disappearing under a mass of bubbles.

◇ ◇ ◇

After that brief fiasco, Flio and his family settled into a nice long bath, joined by Sleip and Byleri. When they got out, Ghozal, Balirossa, and Uliminas were still in the family bath.

As the three finally vacated the family bath, Hiya materialized behind them. “Hm...” they said, nodding to themself, “those three are quite adept in the art as well...”

◇ ◇ ◇

After an early breakfast the following morning, Flio and his companions headed out to ski. The group included two young children—Garyl and Elinàsze—along with Rys and Wyne who were unused to the snow, so they avoided the steepest slopes in favor of the relatively gentle hills closer to the foot of the mountain.

Uliminas stood by the slope, once again wearing layers upon layers. Why did I come meowt here in the cold again...?

“Ser Uliminas,” Balirossa said, worried, “it is quite all right for you to stay warm indoors.”

“Well, I mean...” Uliminas said through her chattering teeth. “We came meowll this way. I gotta try it at least meownce...”

“What’s up, Uliminas?” Ghozal said, noticing her discomfort. “Are you cold?” Without warning, he swept her off her feet and began dashing up the hill with astonishing speed. “It might be hard to move in the cold like that! Let’s roll down the hill like we did yesterday.” He laughed heartily.

“Hey!” Uliminas cried. “What are mew doing?!”

◇ ◇ ◇

Garyl’s eyes lit up as he watched Ghozal and Uliminas roll fast down the snowy hill. “Mama!” he said. “I wanna try that!”

“Garyl,” Rys said, “Ghozal and Uliminas are very skilled. If you tried to copy them, you might end up hurting yourself.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry, but you’re not allowed.”

“But mama! Just once! Please? Just once!” Garyl begged.

But Rys held firm. “I said no.”

Sleip was watching the mother and her son from nearby, a grim smile on his face as he trudged through the snow. Never thought I’d see the day, he thought. Rys the man-eater, acting like a proper mother. In all my long years, I truly never thought I’d see the day.

“Sleip! Like, over here!” Byleri cried, waving him over.

Sleip trotted up to find her sitting atop what looked like a small cart. “Hm...” he said. “Byleri, what is that thing?”

“This is a sled!” she said. “I, like, saw it in a shop and thought it might be fun, so I, like, totally rented it!”

“I see, I see. Then, how does one use this sled?”

“Y’know?” Byleri said, sticking out her tongue and blushing in embarrassment, “I, like, don’t actually know myself?”

“Hah...” Sleip looked around and saw a group of children riding on the same contraption. They were taking it to the top of a small hill and sliding down, crying out with delight as they raced every which way. “I think you need to do more than just sit on the thing, Byleri,” he said.

“Yeah? Like, you think?”

“Here,” he said. “Allow me.” Sleip transformed into his centaur form. An ordinary horse-type demihuman would have had trouble finding footing with their hooves in the snow, but Sleip was a demon. He had the fortitude to walk through the snowbanks.

Sleip took the reins of the sled in hand. “Hold on tight,” he said, quickly darting up a nearby hill.

“Eeek!” Byleri cried as they rocketed through the snow. It was tremendous fun; she had a huge smile on her face as she cried for joy.

Sleip himself couldn’t help but smile, seeing her. Ah, he thought as he picked up speed, I would do almost anything to make that girl happy. Sleip was an old man, but in all his life, he had never felt so overjoyed. “There you go!” he said, giving her a push down the hill.

“Eeeeeeek!” Byleri cried again, grinning as she raced down the hill, the sled leaving tracks in straight lines behind her.

Sleip folded his arms as he watched her, satisfied, when he felt someone tugging at his shoulder. “Hm?” he said, turning around to see Hiya and Damalynas. Hiya had a placid smile on their face and a sled in their arms. “What? Don’t tell me you want me to pull your sled too?”

“This, too, is a form of training,” said Hiya.

“Or something like that,” Damalynas added. “Anyway, thanks in advance!” The pair bowed.

Sleip smirked. “I would think you more than capable of ascending the hill on your own,” he said.

“Ah,” said Hiya, “but the sensation of the wind as you pull us, Sir Sleip, is indispensable to our training.”

“Our great and esteemed Byleri looked like she was having a blast!” Damalynas said. “We’d really appreciate it.”

“Fine, fine,” Sleip said. “The two of you together are an absolute nuisance.” Smirking, he dashed up a hill, pulling Hiya and Damalynas in their sled.

“Exceptional!” Hiya cried. “This is everything I hoped it would be.”

“Yahoo!” Damalynas cheered. “Your Divinity, this is great!”

“Indeed. Doing this with you will prove fruitful as training.”

“One hundred percent!” Beaming, Damalynas wrapped her arms tight around Hiya. And then, when they reached the peak of the hill, Sleip gave them a push.

“Excellent!” Hiya declared. “Most excellent indeed!”

“This is the best!” The two cried out happily, looking for all the world like small children as their sled flew down the slope.

“Now to give Byleri another turn,” said Sleip, taking a step in her direction.

“Um,” someone said, “excuse me?”

“Hm?” Sleip turned around to see a child and his father, two people he had never met before, standing before him. He gave them a dubious look. “Yes? Do you need something?”

“Um...” the child said, timidly holding out the reins of his sled. “Mister? Would you mind pulling my sled too?”

“Huh?!” Sleip exclaimed, his eyes going wide.

“You see,” said the boy’s father, “I would like to pull his sled myself, but I’m not used to snow. I was watching you run up the mountain. You were lightning fast! Would you please? For my son?” He bowed deeply, and the child lowered his head as well.

Just then, Byleri walked up, smiling and dragging along her sled. “Like, there’s no harm in giving them one ride, is there?”

“Well, if you say so, Byleri.” Sleip took the child’s sled by the reins.

Suddenly, Uliminas appeared beside him, still dressed up like a snowman. “Okay, okay!” she said. “We’ll do registration over here. If anymeown wants a ride, get in line! The centaur will carry mew up in meowrder. Put your meowney into this box!” She was holding a handmade sign she must have put together at some point, reading “Registration.” Apparently, she was setting up a shop to sell Sleip’s sled rides. A line was already beginning to form.

“Hey! Uliminas!” Sleip protested. “What’s the big idea?”

“Whenever there’s an oppurrtunity for purrofit, I’ll be there,” Uliminas said. “Just leave everything to meowrs truly.”

“Wait! No! That’s not what I—”

“Now hurry up and help the furst in line!”

“I, er, I mean...”

Uliminas was persistent, and in the end, Sleip was unable to refuse her demands. He ended up being stuck pulling sleds up the mountain until nightfall.

◇A Restaurant on the Ski Slope◇

Hero Gold-Hair, Tsuya, and Riliangiu sat in a restaurant on a ski slope in the Alips Mountains. It was cold outside, so the three of them were wearing heavy winter clothing.

“My lord, my lady, ” Riliangiu said, “I have obtained the soup.” Smiling, she placed a pot full of soup in front of Tsuya and Hero Gold-Hair.

“Ah! Thank you, Riliangiu,” said Hero Gold-Hair.

“You’re always sooo helpful, Miss Riliangiu!” said Tsuya.

Riliangiu was moved by their thanks. When I worked for the Realm of Evil, they never thanked me for completing a mission; they never so much as had a fond word for me! Prince Charming...I mean, my lord Hero Gold-Hair and my lady Tsuya are such wonderful people...

Ever since Hero Gold-Hair and Tsuya had found her near the hill and saved her life, Riliangiu had been traveling with them. She had told them she was an amnesiac. “All I know,” she had said at the time, “is that when I came to, I was collapsed in a forest...”

“I see...” Hero Gold-Hair had said. “There must be something at work behind our meeting. You should come with us until you regain your memories.”

Tsuya agreed. “Let us knooow if you remeeember anything!” she said, smiling. “We’ll have all kiiinds of adventures!”

“Hm?” Hero Gold-Hair said, back in the present. “Riliangiu, did you not get soup for yourself?”

“Ah...” she said. “N-No, I don’t deserve any, my lord...”

“Don’t be so uptight!” he said. “You’re one of us!” He handed her his own portion of soup. “Eat this. I’ll go get my own.”

“But... I...”

“Don’t worry about it! You two go ahead and get started, I’ll be back in a bit.” With a smile on his face, Hero Gold-Hair walked off.

Riliangiu found herself grinning bashfully as she watched him go, her face red. Ahh, my Prince Charming—Hero Gold-Hair, I mean! I would die for you, my lord...

“You know,” Hero Gold-Hair said to himself, oblivious to Riliangiu’s wistful gaze. “I’ve heard that some of the magic beasts in the forests around here sell for good money. Maybe I’ll go set some traps after we’re done here...”

◇A Lodge in the Alips Mountains◇

After dinner and a bath back at the Resort Spa, Flio’s companions met in the main room of the lodge.

“Of all the miserable days...” Sleip said, sighing as he lay on a big sofa.

“Sleip? Like, are you okay?” Byleri said, massaging his lower back with a worried look on her face. Byleri had weak arms and no idea how to give proper massages. By all rights it shouldn’t have helped at all, but Sleip looked very happy to be receiving it.

“Aaah,” he said. “With your massage, Byleri, my fatigue will be gone in no time.”

Byleri smiled. “Like, totally! I’ll do my best!” she said and started using more force.

“I had no idea snow could be so much fun! It’s a winter wonderland out there!” Blossom said with a happy smile. She had been late to get back. “I’ve only ever lived in warm places. This was my first time even seeing snow, much less playing in it! I only wish Maunty and Hokh’hokton were here...”

Belano was sitting stiffly next to her, almost as though she were frozen solid. “Huh?” Flio said, looking over curiously. “Belano, what’s wrong?” But the girl wasn’t moving an inch.

“Oh, don’t worry, Lord Flio,” Blossom said. “Belano’s just sore from all the running around she did.”

“Still?” Flio asked, surprised. Belano had only arrived a few hours ago, and she hadn’t played for very long.

Slowly, Belano turned her head to look at Flio. And then, even more slowly, she nodded. Her movements were stiff. It seemed like she was terribly sore.

Flio walked over, placed a hand on Belano’s back, and cast a healing spell. “We have one more day here, so make sure you rest up,” he said. Belano smiled and nodded. The magic must have worked. She was visibly moving more smoothly.

“Would you heal old Sleip as well, my lord husband?” Rys said. “I’m afraid Byleri’s power won’t be enough.”

“No, no,” Sleip said. “Byleri’s hands are working wonders.” He pointed to his chest. “Especially here.”

“Well,” Rys said, hiding her grin behind her fingertips, “in that case, enjoy yourself.”

Byleri’s face was bright red listening to Sleip and Rys’s conversation. I-I’m happy, she thought. I’m totally happy, just... Oh my gosh, I am so embarrassed! She kept on messaging Sleip’s back, her face cast studiously down.

◇The Following Morning◇

Valentine rushed through the forest at top speed. She had left Zanzibar’s mansion to come here after sensing a large gathering of humans and demihumans. She had sucked the magic out of a few magic beasts and recovered a bit of her strength, but she needed more power. And so she continued northward, following the information she was able to obtain through her magic. Eventually, she reached a mountainous region covered in snow.

Well, this is peculiar, she thought. What would a group of humans be doing in a miserable frozen place like this? Even Valentine, who was from the Dark World and well-seasoned to extreme temperatures, felt a little chilly in this weather. This didn’t seem like it would be an easy place for any human or demihuman to live—even a demon might have trouble. Yet Valentine’s magic was telling her that just ahead was a great gathering of humans.

Is this a trap? she wondered. Well, either way, I don’t have enough magic left to make it to the mansion. I can’t turn back now. Valentine pressed forward. And then, between a gap in the trees, she saw a great field of snow. There were a number of large buildings ahead, and in front of them, a great crowd of humans and demihumans doing something in the snow.

“Wh-What is this?” Valentine tensed up, her eyes opening wide as she took in the bizarre scene. What are they all doing here? What’s so important that they’d go out in the cold for it? She looked around. There were children sledding, people skiing down the mountain, others rolling up a giant snowball... I don’t get it at all! Are they seriously enjoying this?!

Eventually, still eyeing the place with suspicion, she took a faltering step towards the crowd.

Valentine mingled with the crowd of humans. Observing them and eavesdropping on their conversation, she learned the following: There were only this many humans in this region during winter, when the snow piles up. This field of snow was called a “ski slope.” And the humans here were doing something called “winter sports,” a category of game that included skiing and sledding.

What are they meant to be doing, exactly? “Skiing,” and “sledding”... What would possess them to want to play in this cold?! The more she learned, the less she understood. Perhaps, she thought, finally, I should try these “winter sports” for myself...

◇Meanwhile, on the Ski Slope◇

“Uliminas, are you going to make me pull sleds again?” Sleip looked over the ski slope to find that Uliminas had already set up a sign reading “Sled Ride Registration,” and had even prepared numbered tickets for the customers. He grimaced.

Uliminas, who hadn’t gotten any more comfortable with the cold since last time, was still bundled up like a snowman, waddling with steps so tiny, you couldn’t see her legs move as she weaved between the crowd. When she saw Sleip, she gave him a cheery thumbs-up. “Don’t worry!” she said. “I’ve got everything meowll set up.”

Sleip sighed and shook his head. “That isn’t exactly the issue here...” he said. But Uliminas pointed at someone behind him. “Hm?” Sleip turned around to see Dalc Horst and the rest of his personal guard. “D-Dalc Horst! Everyone! Wh-What are you doing here?”

“We received a summons from Lady Uliminas early this morning, Lord Sleip,” Dalc Horst said. “She said she had a special mission for us, and that everyone available should come, but...” He looked around. “Lord Sleip, what is this mission, exactly?”

Honestly, Sleip thought. It’s almost like we never left the Dark Army. Of course they’d come. He smirked and explained the situation to Dalc Horst and the rest.

“I see...” Dalc Horst said. “Humans will board this ‘sled,’ and we are to carry them up the mountain?”

“That’s the gist of it,” said Sleip. “Then you just let them slide on down at their leisure.”

“I’m not sure I understand what humans get out of this, but I will give it all I’m worth!” Dalc Horst struck a pose.

“This is a game, all right?” Sleip said. “Try to have fun.”

◇ ◇ ◇

Valentine found herself in the queue for Uliminas’s sled-riding service. This looks like the most popular attraction on the mountain, she thought as she peered at the crowd ahead, waiting for her turn.

There was a team of centaur demihumans standing by to take the customers’ sleds by the reins and race up the mountain with incredible speed. Men and women, old and young alike, were grinning and crying out with joy as they sped away. And then they would ride the sled down the slope, crying out just as joyfully.

Valentine was more confused than ever. They just...ride that thing up and down the mountain? What’s so great about that?

Uliminas, big and round like a snowball, waddled up to her. “Good aftermewn!” she said. “Are mew here for the sleds or the horseback riding?”

“Horseback riding?” Valentine asked, puzzled. She had thought that all that was happening here was the sleds, but she took another look and saw a number of children and adults riding on centaurs’ backs as they dashed through the snow. Horseback riding in the snow? Valentine blinked. Is that fun? Everything was unfamiliar. She had no idea what to do. Panicking, she clutched her head in her hands, eyes open wide.

“Is something wrong?” Uliminas said, looking curiously at her. “Have mew not decided? You’ll have a good time either way, I purromise.” In her right hand was a sled ticket, and in her left, a horseback riding ticket. She held them out for Valentine, a big cheery smile on her face.

Valentine was at a loss. “I-I...” she stumbled. “I’ll have the ‘sled’ then, if you please...”

“Okay! It’s meown silver for meown ticket, or five silver for six. Purretty good value, huh?”

Valentine’s eyes went wider. “Wh-What? You need money?” The issue of payment hadn’t occurred to her at all. In the Realm of Evil, she had aides to handle such matters and was not used to paying for things herself. All she could do was gawp. Oh, nooo, she thought. It’s finally my turn, and I won’t be able to ride the sled! She fumbled and groped around on her person for any spare coins she might have, but she had bolted out of Zanzibar’s mansion completely empty-handed. She wasn’t carrying anything like money. Without meaning to at all, she started to cry.

“What’s wrong, miss?” Uliminas asked. “Did mew forget meowr purrse?”

“U-Um, I... Th-That is...” Valentine stammered. “I... I may have...” She nodded.

Uliminas nodded back. “What a catastrophe!” she said. “Mew poor thing. Here. I’ll let mew ride meown time for free.” She showed Valentine to the sled-staging area.

Valentine clasped her hands together in front of her chest as Uliminas in her layers of coats waddled on ahead of her. What a kind, round lady! She thought. For the first time in her life, she was crying tears of joy.

◇ ◇ ◇

After her sled ride, Valentine stayed at the foot of the hill, dumbfounded, not moving from the sled. Her lips were trembling, her cheeks pink with exhilaration. “How...” she muttered. “The speed... The bracing cold wind rushing past... The snow... Everything felt so good! I never imagined I would find something so fun here! This is far more enjoyable than destroying worlds.”

Afterwards, she pleaded with the owner of a sled rental shop, who let her borrow a sled they were about to decommission. She took it and rode it down the hill again and again and again. To think this world was hiding such a marvel! she thought, basking in the sensation at the bottom of the hill, a look of pure joy on her face.

She kept on basking as she dashed back up the hill with her sled. She would much rather have gotten one of the centaurs to pull her, but without any money, this was the best she could do. And she reveled in the joy as she played on to her heart’s content.

◇ ◇ ◇

It’s over... Valentine thought, standing in a daze. It’s all over... Before her were the remains of her smashed-up sled. It had already been on its last legs when she’d obtained it, though, and she knew that sooner or later it was going to break. But to Valentine, in that moment, it felt like nothing short of imminent death.

Bereft of her toy, Valentine trudged on through the snow. Ahead of her, she could see a group of children and adults tossing snowballs at each other. What are those people doing? she wondered, curiosity drawing her closer to the sight. Whatever it is, they look like they’re enjoying themselves... She decided to try speaking to them. “Excuse me!” she said, addressing a nearby man. “What exactly is happening over there?”

The man folded his arms. “Hrm.” he said. “Oh, that? It’s a game where they make snowballs and throw them at one another. A ‘snowball fight,’ they call it. They—” A snowball thrown by a woman across from them struck him in the face, interrupting the explanation.

“Got him!” the woman cheered, jumping for joy. “Ghozal’s out!”

“Not now, Rys!” the man snapped. Ghozal, it seemed, was his name. “I’m speaking with this woman! That doesn’t count!” He was worked up enough that his magic power flared out of his body.

“Now, now, Mister Ghozal,” Flio said, hurrying over to Ghozal’s side. “Let’s keep a hold on ourselves.” He placed his hand on Ghozal’s shoulder, and the flaring magic vanished.

Valentine’s eyes lit up. A “snowball fight”... she thought. Incredible! What joys, what sorrows can be felt, simply by tossing a ball of snow? Oh, it looks like terrific fun! Her cheeks were turning pink in excitement again as she watched Wyne, Garyl, and Elinàsze pelt each other with snowballs.

“Excuse me,” Flio said to her. He had noticed how intently Valentine had been watching the snowball fight. “Would you, perhaps, care to join us?”

Valentine’s face lit up. “M-May I?!” She grabbed onto Flio’s wrist with both hands.

And so, Valentine joined the snowball fight. She gave it her all and had lots of fun. Soon, she was lost in making snowballs, throwing snowballs, having snowballs thrown at her...

“Hey! I’m gonna get the new girl!” Garyl aimed a snowball straight for Valentine, a big grin on his face. He struck true.

“Yooouuu!” Valentine wailed. “I’ll get you back! Just you wait!” Hefting a snowball as big as her head, she ran after Garyl, but Wyne nailed her with a snowball from the side.

“I’ll save you, Gare-Gare!” Wyne said. But a magic circle appeared, stopping the snowball from hitting Valentine.

“Huh?” Valentine said, confused. “What was that?”

Flio was behind her, petting Elinàsze on the head. “I know you wanted to help the lady, Elinàsze,” he said. “But magic is against the rules, okay?”

“I’m sorry, papa,” Elinàsze said. “I just really wanted to help her, and the magic happened on its own...” She hung her head, looking troubled.

“Come now,” Valentine said, “don’t be so hard on the girl. She only wanted to help.” She hugged Elinàsze and bowed to Flio. And then, unconsciously and without meaning to, she said, “I’m sorry.”

“I suppose I can let it slide just this once,” Flio said, smirking. “Anyway, let’s get back to it!”

Grinning, Valentine hugged Elinàsze a second time. “That was splendid magic,” she said.

“Thank you, Miss!” Elinàsze looked up at her happily.

Valentine lost herself in the snowball fight for a while later, smiling the whole time. It was not the smile of a murderous Evil General here to destroy the world, but a girl enjoying a game down to the very depths of her heart.

◇ ◇ ◇

The sun was setting when Valentine parted ways with Flio’s crowd, smiling as she walked through the snow. Sterner, the Mistress of Evil, had ordered her to assist the rebel leader Zanzibar as part of her plan to destroy the world. She was one of the Twelve Evil Generals. She was Valentine.

And yet, at that moment, none of that mattered to her at all. She rested under the shade of a big tree and took out a magic gem. This gem was made for communication. It was her only line back to the Dark World.

“If I destroy this gem,” she told herself, “the link between the Dark World and this one will be sundered completely.” She placed it down on the snow, readying herself. “There’s so much fun in this world!” she said. “I want to see more and more of its wonders. I won’t let the Realm of Evil destroy it!”

She struck the gem with all the magic power left in her body. It shattered and vanished, not even a shard remaining. Aha ha... she thought. Now I’ve done it... A smile on her face, she took a step towards the forest.

Suddenly, the ground gave way under her feet! She plummeted down a hole that had appeared without warning. “No!” Valentine reached out, trying to grab onto the edge of the hole but clutched onto naught but empty air, her body plummeting farther and farther down.

She had fallen into a trap meant for hunting game. With all her power exhausted, she had no means to escape. Desperately, she stretched her arm upward to the top of the hole, but she just couldn’t reach. But... she thought. But I decided to live in this world... I wanted to have fun!

Finally, abandoning all hope, she closed her eyes...and felt something grab hold of her. There was an arm sticking down, grabbing onto hers.

“Huh?” she said, unsure what was happening. She peered out of the hole to see Hero Gold-Hair.

“It’s a good thing I came to check on my magic beast trap,” he said. Then, hurriedly glancing over his shoulder, he added, “Hey! Tsuya! Riliangiu! Grab hold of my legs! There’s a person in here!”

“My lord!” Riliangiu said. “You mustn’t rescue this woman! This is General Valentine of the Twelve Evil Generals! She’s here to destroy the world!”

Tsuya looked at Riliangiu in shock. “R-Riliaaangiu!” she said. “Are your meeemories back?”

“I—!” Riliangiu blurted out. “That is! I mean! I just...I just know that that’s who she is.”

“I don’t give a damn if she’s in the Twelve Evil Generals or the Twelve Drummers Drumming!” Hero Gold-Hair shouted back. “My intuition is telling me not to let her die! Now help!”

“Okaaay!” said Tsuya. “I’m coooming!”

“I—” Riliangiu started. “Yes, my lord.”

The two of them grabbed hold of his legs and pulled for all they were worth. The sight of it moved Valentine to tears. I’m going to get to live in this world after all, she thought. Thank goodness... Thank goodness...

◇That Night, at the Resort Spa◇

“What a day! I had a blast!” Dalc Horst said as he filled Sleip’s glass with liquor. Behind him were the rest of Sleip’s former personal guard.

“Did you now?” Sleip said, inclining his head. “Don’t you think it’s a lot of work, running up and down the mountain like that?”

“Not at all, if it makes the people happy! We had a great time!”

“And we got to run all-out in the snow!” another added. “We’ve never had a chance to do that before.”

“I see...” Sleip said. “Well, I’m glad you enjoyed yourselves.”

“Everyone was, like, totally having a blast!” Byleri said, smiling. “It was wonderful!” Her words brought a smile to Sleip’s face.

Uliminas appeared in front of the group, carrying a wooden tray packed full of food and liquor. “Great job everymeown!” she said. “We made a killing! There’s more fur d’oeuvres here than mew could ever need, so take all mew want!”

“Huh? Isn’t this super expensive liquor?”

“That food looks amazing too...”

“Thank you, Miss Uliminas!” Sleip’s guards cheered as they grabbed for the food and drink.

“You’re a hell of a taskmaster, but you know how to reward effort,” Sleip said, grabbing a drink himself. “I suppose you just about ran the Dark Army, after all.”

Uliminas grinned back at him. “With a layabout Dark Meown like that, I had to pick up the slack,” she said. She took a bottle herself and drained it. “Enjoy, everymeown!”

Cries of joy rang out.

Rys stepped up to Flio, who was watching the scene with his easygoing smile on his face. “My lord husband, did you notice?” she said. “About the woman from earlier.”

“Miss Valentine, you mean?” Flio asked. Rys nodded. “I saw she was from the Dark World, yeah. But I didn’t sense any kind of hostility.”

“So you chose to overlook it?”

“I did. Obviously, if she tries anything, I’ll do everything I can to stop it, but...” He looked to his side, where Elinàsze had fallen asleep, her arms wrapped around him. Next to her, sleeping in a cuddle pile, were Wyne and Garyl. The three had spent all day playing, and had fallen asleep very early. “She was so good at playing with the children.”

“She was,” Rys admitted. “The four of them looked like they were having a wonderful time.”

“You were pretty happy to hit Mister Ghozal with a snowball yourself, weren’t you, Rys?” Flio teased.

“I-I suppose so.” Rys blushed a little, remembering.

“I don’t think she’s a bad person,” Flio continued. “I’m sure we can get along with her and have fun together in this world.”

“You’re right. I believe I feel the same way.” Rys pressed close to Flio’s shoulder. “The utopia of my lord husband’s dreams,” she mused. “A world where everyone is enjoying life.”

“I don’t know how much I can do,” Flio said, “but I want to do everything I can.”

“And I will be with you every step of the way.” Rys rested her head against Flio’s chest, and the two gently embraced.

◇ ◇ ◇

While Flio and Rys were having their happy little reverie, Ghozal was sitting on a sofa in front of them, a drunk Uliminas dangling off of him. She pressed her cheek close to his neck. “Hey, Ghozal,” she said, her face bright red. “Whatcha gonna do with me and Balirossa?”

Balirossa darted over too, every bit as drunk as Uliminas. “Yes!” she said. “I would like to know that as well.”

“Me and Balirossa both love mew, y’know!”

“Yes. Ser Uliminas and I both love you very much.” They were staring at Ghozal’s face like they might bore a hole into it from either side. Ghozal sat stoically, a serious expression on his face.

“So, mew know, Ghozal,” Uliminas slurred, “I know we said we were gonna wait for mew to make up your mind and all...”

“We don’t mean to rush you!” Balirossa said. “It’s just, well... We are women, you know. We would like some sort of solid proof that we belong to the man we love.”

“I’ve been meowr confederate for a long time,” Uliminas said. “I’ve done so much for mew...”

“I-I feel that I am always being rescued by you, Ghozal,” Balirossa said. “I must be a terrible burden. But that’s why, even more so, I would give up my life to return the favor...”

Uliminas and Balirossa seemed lost in their respective alcohol-fueled reveries. Ghozal looked at both of them in turn from the corners of his eyes and said, “Hrm. I understand how you feel. I’ve known for a while.” He wrapped an arm around them each. “I swear to you now,” he said. “I will take the two of you as my wives.”

At those words, silence fell over the room. And then, everyone erupted into cheers.

“Congratulations, Lord Ghozal!”

“Long live Lord Ghozal!”

“Hooray! Yahoo!”

In the middle of the cheering crowd was Ghozal.

“S-Sir Ghozal!” said Balirossa. “Do you speak true? You would take us both?”

“Hrm. Demon law permits up to three wives. It’s no problem.”

“But we can’t both be your first wife...”

“I love you both too much to make one of you first and the other second!” Ghozal said, holding them both tight.

The two wrapped their arms around Ghozal’s upper body. “Of all the purrposterous solutions...” Uliminas said.

“But...it suits us,” said Balirossa. The three held each other close, Balirossa and Uliminas on either side, and Ghozal in the middle. They were all weeping openly.

Flio and Rys stood up, and began to applaud. “Congratulations, Mister Ghozal!” Flio said.

“Hrm,” Ghozal smiled back. “Thank you, Mister Flio.”

It was a long time before the room stopped applauding.