Chivalry of a Failed Knight Vol. 3

“Oh? Hey, Pres is back! Hellooo!”

“Ahaha☆ You’re so clumsy, Touka. Falling over again?”

Renren and Utakata greeted Touka when they noticed her, but she merely knitted her eyebrows tightly at the two of them before yelling at the top of her lungs.

“Ughhh! Tomaru! How many times I gotta tell ya to put them dumbbells back after ya use ’em?! They’re right dangerous! And Uta, put ya manga back on the shelf when yer done havin’ a read of it! Ya always leave it lyin’ around! I was gone for a single day; how’d ya manage to make such a pigsty o’ the place?!”

“Hmph! What makes you think we messed the place up, Pres? You could be making a false accusation here!”

“Tomaru is the only one who does strength training in the council room, and you two are always the ones leaving manga around!” Touka cried, having collected herself just enough to speak normally again.

“Aw, I just wanted to binge-read some Samurai Z, Dragon Orb, and Dunk Shot. It’s always such a pain to keep going to the shelf, so I took ’em all out. Then I got all nostalgic for my childhood, so I had to turn the room upside-down looking for my SMES before I could finally dig the thing up. Oh, but don’t worry! Ikazuchi and Kanata did all the work while you were gone.”

“Your smugness over making other people do all the work is making me mad! Honestly, you’re always—”

“President, I apologize for interrupting you while you’re worked up, but you have visitors.”

“Huh?!”

Touka, having forgotten herself in rage upon seeing the sad state of the room, pivoted to face the doorway. There, Ikki and Stella stood just outside the hoarders’ home, watching the pitiful performance before them with forced grins.

“O-Oh, ahaha. Wait here for juuust a sec, okay?” Touka plastered a smile onto her pale face as she pushed the two into the hallway and slammed the door shut. “Come on and help me clean up! Turn that stupid game off, Uta!”

“Whoa! H-Hang on, Touka! I haven’t saved my game since yesterday! W-Wait, no— Waaahhhhh! My Zola’s Flippers!”

“I keep telling you, limit your gaming time to an hour a day! I swear, I take my eyes off of you for one day! And Tomaru, look at how you’re dressed! There’s a boy right next to you! At least put on a skirt or something!”

“You’re the one who broke the AC, Pres. It’s hot in here!”

“Yep. Whenever you touch any appliance, you go and short it out.”

“I-I am extremely sorry for that, yes, but that doesn’t give you the right to laze around in your underwear! Where’s your discipline?! This isn’t a good look for us, the role models for students all around the school!”

“But you’re always napping in your underwear back in our dorm.”

“Ahaha☆ You’ve always needed someone to keep you on your toes, Touka. Otherwise you start getting lazier and lazier.”

“M-M-My private life ain’t got nothing to do with it! J-Just tidy up, for cryin’ out loud! Anythin’ ya leave sittin’ out, I’m tossin’ out!”

“Whoa! Okay, okay!”

“Hurry, hurry!”

The council room boomed and shook, as if the members inside were moving homes.

“It’s like Touka is their mother.”

“The student council certainly has its share of troubles.”

Listening to the hustle and bustle from the hallway, Ikki and Stella suddenly had the urge to be nicer to Touka. She had chased them out before they could even put the papers down, but they could hardly blame her. The two of them waited several minutes, until finally, the student council room’s door opened and a haggard Touka poked her head out.

“Haah, haah… S-Sorry for the wait. Please, come in.”

“S-Sure. Thanks.”

Ikki followed Stella into the room, wondering if accepting Touka’s invitation to tea had been a mistake, but he was shocked; the inside was nearly spotless, as if they had swapped it out with an entirely different room. The books were all neatly in their shelves, and the floor was so well-polished that he could see his reflection in it. The cleanliness and the subtle, refined antique style of the furniture made the room seem much like a chamber in a Western castle.

It was admirable how they had cleaned up so much in only a few minutes—at least, until Ikki’s all-seeing eyes gravitated toward the truth.

Huh. That closet over there looks like it’s about to burst. In front of the door, Saijou stood firm, like a guardian statue. I’ll just pretend I didn’t see it.

He chose not to disturb the lid of Pandora’s box, letting himself and Stella be guided to a sofa in the center of the room. Once the two had taken their seats around the same table as the members of the student council, Renren grinned affably from the other side of the table.

“Been a while, eh, Kurogane? You’ve just been winning constantly since you beat me.”

“Yeah, I’m really giving it my all out there.”

Following up on their exchange, Kanata offered Stella a tender smile and a greeting. Her eyes, peeking out from under the brim of her hat for the first time, were blue.

“It’s been some time since we met at that restaurant, hasn’t it, Stella?”

“Yes. I didn’t think I’d ever end up in this room, though.”

“Toutokubara, could you bring these two some tea, please?” Touka requested.

“Of course.”

“Hey, Kanata! One more for me!”

“Kanata! I want some cupcakes!”

Utakata and Renren put in orders of their own as well.

“You two will go without dessert today.”

“Wh-Whaaat?!”

“That’s just mean, Touka! Why are we even here if we don’t get dessert?!”

“Because you’re members of the student council!”

Touka had raised her voice to a yell. Truly, her life seemed to be a long chain of rapid-fire retorts. Suddenly, while struggling to keep the closet shut—rather, while he stood idly in front of the closet, Saijou’s usually-stern face broke out in delight as he spoke to Touka, who was nearly hyperventilating from overwork.

“I must say, President, you work fast. You’ve already found someone to help us with the matter from before, and the perfect pair, at that. They won’t be lacking in fighting ability, to be sure.”

“Fighting ability”? “Help”?

Ikki and Stella tilted their heads, confused by his ominous words—Touka hadn’t mentioned anything like that.

“Come again?”

When they shot questioning glances at her, they could almost see the question mark floating over her puzzled face. Meanwhile, Saijou was obviously bewildered by her reaction.

“Hm? What, have I got it wrong? We don’t usually get visitors, so I figured that was it.”

“Did you really forget, Touka? Come on, the director herself asked us for this.”

“Kurono asked us… Aaahhhhh!” Touka screamed, her face pale-white.

“My, my. You honestly forgot, didn’t you? I was convinced that was why you had brought these two along.”

“Oh… Well, yes, I did forget. I was so focused on my battle with Shizuku that I forgot.”

“So? What’s all this about?” Stella asked from beside Ikki, interrogating the crestfallen Touka, but the answer was instead provided by Kanata as she poured tea for everyone.

“Recently, Director Shinguuji requested a favor from the student council. Our school’s Seven Stars representatives are usually sent to a training camp in Okutama, but it seems some dubious individual has appeared there.”

“That’s not good.”

“Right. The student council was asked to travel there and confirm things were safe, as all of the teachers are too busy with the selection battles. However, the area around the campground is full of tall mountains and thick forests, so we’re simply lacking in numbers.”

“I see. So you were looking for help from outside the council.” The instructors weren’t the only ones whose schedules were full from because of the selection battles. “By the way, what is this ‘dubious individual’ like? Do we know anything about them?”

“Yes, well…” Kanata hesitated before answering. “It seems to be a giant, standing well over fifteen feet tall.”

“What?!”

“A giant?!”

“Yes, a giant. And I don’t mean the sports team.”

“I know.”

“I’m not talking about titans, either, so stay your attacks.”

“I said I know. But I’m surprised by what you know, Toutokubara.”

“H-Hey, are giants really real?!”

Stella took the opportunity to jump into the absurd conversation, leaning forward with excitement. Her scarlet eyes gleamed like an overenthusiastic child’s.

“That really got you chomping at the bit, didn’t it, Stella?”

“It’s giants we’re talking about here! They’re so mysterious, like cryptids!”

“No way! You like that kind of stuff too, Stella?!” Renren hailed her newfound comrade.

“I love it! In fact, I learned Japanese from Japanese documentaries about Bigfoot!”

That was her introduction to Japanese culture?! Ikki shuddered, but Renren seemed as though she’d found a kindred spirit.

“Ooh! Now you’re speakin’ my language!”

“Well—”

“Vice President,” Kanata said, quickly interrupting Utakata, “I believe that’s enough.”

“Hey, Ikki! Touka needs us, so we should help her out! I wanna see a giant!”

Stella took Ikki by the shoulders and shook him. He honestly didn’t have much interest in giants, but he was benefitting from the new selection battle system that had made things so busy for the student council, so he was more than willing to assist them and happily agreed to the request.

“If you need our help, we’d be glad to join you as fellow students.”

“Y-You mean it?!” Their ready assent had given Touka new life. She was no longer holding her head in her hands.

“We can’t turn a blind eye to the training camp being ruined, anyway. If you’d be willing to have us—”

“We’d love to have you! Thank you so much! You’re such a huge help!”

Touka graciously accepted, extending her gratitude with an outstretched hand.

“Don’t worry, it’s my pleasure!” Stella replied, intercepting her with an enthusiastic handshake.

“Huh? Oh, um, sure. Thank you.”

Thus, Ikki and Stella would be joining the student council on their journey to Okutama the following weekend.