Chapter 8: A Tinge of Anxiety

Chapter 8: A Tinge of Anxiety

Chapter 8:

A Tinge of Anxiety

T HE CLOSING CEREMONY of the second semester had ended. The special exam was over, and the time that the students had been eagerly awaiting had come. It might not have been a long vacation like summer break, but it was still a joyous time for most of the students. Their hard work studying day and night had earned them the reward of victory over Class A in a direct showdown. Without a doubt, the winter vacation that was set to begin tomorrow was sure to be a series of fun-filled days.

Everyone in class thought so, except for one person. That sole exception was none other than Karuizawa Kei. She let out a melancholy sigh, having come to Keyaki Mall with her best friend, Satou Maya. Karuizawa had always been good at putting up a tough front, and she’d appeared calm and composed at school, even concentrating on her studies, after she had that fight with Ayanokouji. For that reason, the people around her had no way of knowing that she continued to agonize over what was going on.

Her best friend Satou was included among that number, but as someone who was a close observer of not only Karuizawa but also Ayanokouji, she had noticed that the two of them, who were normally always near each other, seemed to be awfully far apart lately. However, she didn’t think that the cause was a fight. She could only imagine that they were deliberately keeping their distance from each other so that they could concentrate on their studies, and she didn’t pursue the matter too deeply. Thus, they were brought to today.

Karuizawa sighed.

“You’ve been sighing nonstop lately,” said Satou. “We finally finished studying, so things should be chill now. What’s wrong?”

“Hm? H-huh? Have I? Nothing’s wrong,” Karuizawa protested.

She had been trying to avoid letting anyone notice what was going on up until this point, but she realized that she had been unwittingly sighing over and over and over lately, perhaps because she had relaxed now that she was free from having to study and take exams, something that she wasn’t good at dealing with.

“…Really?” asked Satou.

“Really, really.”

Karuizawa answered confidently and acted the part, but Satou’s suspicions weren’t clearing up.

“This might be a dumb question, but aren’t you going to make plans with Ayanokouji-kun today?” asked Satou.

“Huh?”

“Because, like, break starts tomorrow. You usually go out together and do stuff, right? I mean, Shinohara-san and Ike-kun looked so happy—they were arm in arm, talking about how they were gonna go see a movie and stuff.”

Satou pointed out that it was strange for either of them to invite the other to hang out without planning it in advance. While, on one hand, Karuizawa felt that she had failed in keeping up the act, she had been acting the way she was because somewhere deep down in her heart, she wanted to come to Satou for advice. She responded with a small nod, and the two of them walked through the café, which was starting to get crowded. They sat down together on a bench near the rest area on the second floor of the mall.

“So, hey, um, Maya-chan,” Karuizawa said. “I actually kind of wanted to talk to you about something…”

“Sure, I’m more than happy to listen.” Far from sounding uncomfortable about this, Satou was enthusiastic, as though she had been waiting for it.

Karuizawa first made sure that no one else was around, just in case. Then, she let out the feelings that she had been keeping bottled up inside. “I think that maybe my and Kiyotaka’s relationship might be in a little trouble…”

“W-wait, what? Seriously?!” Satou hadn’t expected Karuizawa to drop such a bombshell on her, and was startled to the point of practically falling over. It didn’t seem like she was overreacting on purpose, though, and she cleared her thoughts as she regained her original posture.

“Relationship trouble, huh…? Are you saying you might break up?” she asked.

“I don’t want to think so, but…but… Lately, I can’t help but think yeah, maybe.”

The look on Karuizawa’s face was far more serious than Satou had expected, and Satou couldn’t hide how shaken she was, choking back her words. Even so, she wisely tried to come up with something to say that wouldn’t make the atmosphere even heavier.

“So, Kei-chan. You and Ayanokouji-kun had a fight. But you haven’t made up, and this thing has dragged on for a long time now. What I’m wondering is, was it just that bad of a fight or something?”

If it had just been a trivial little quarrel, even if it was dragged out, their relationship could’ve gotten back to normal in just a couple of hours at most. Karuizawa’s expression was grave, though. Satou couldn’t hide how puzzled she felt, since she had always thought that the two had gotten along well ever since they started dating.

Karuizawa let out a despondent sigh and nodded quietly. “I thought it was a small fight, but maybe that’s not true for Kiyotaka.”

“Have you two talked at all since the fight?” asked Satou.

Karuizawa told her that the fight hadn’t happened just yesterday or today. However, she still wasn’t making any mention of things like the cause, perhaps because she didn’t feel ready to talk about it.

“I mean, it’s winter break already, right?” Karuizawa said. “And on top of that, I worked really hard on studying because Kiyotaka told me to do my best, and I got three out of four questions right on the exam. So, I thought, okay, I can do this, this will work… And then yesterday, after the exam, I made up my mind and tried my hardest to go talk to him, but…”

“But? And then what?” asked Satou.

“Horikita-san came over. Nagumo-senpai was asking for them, and they left. I was going to try again to talk to him today, after the closing ceremony, but then Horikita-san ended up talking to him again…”

Satou couldn’t help but hold her hand to her forehead after hearing how Karuizawa had repeatedly suffered the worst timing.

“So, in the end, you couldn’t talk to him at all, and that brings us to now,” she concluded.

“Yeah,” said Karuizawa.

“But it hasn’t looked like Ayanokouji-kun’s been mad, or sulking, or anything.”

“That’s because he’s always expressionless. He never acts any different.”

That fact had also clouded Karuizawa’s judgment on the matter. She thought back on it; if he had shown obvious anger, an apology could have come earlier.

“I hope you don’t mind me asking this, because I don’t mean anything bad by it, but do you fight a lot?” asked Satou.

The word “fight” popped up regularly among girls who were particularly excited to talk about romantic love, and fighting in itself wasn’t uncommon. Moreover, in most cases, it wasn’t really something that could even be called a fight at all—more like a minor issue that made things turn awkward, or something like that. Satou wanted to see if there were any other instances that could be classified as fights first, but she hadn’t been able to broach the topic right away.

“I mean, by ‘fight,’ it’s like, you know, everyone has fights. I can’t imagine Ayanokouji-kun getting angry at all, but…was he angry then?” she asked timidly.

Karuizawa immediately shook her head from side to side. “I’m the one who was mad.”

“Oh, okay, I see,” said Satou. She wondered if she was about to hear an unexpected side to the story, but quickly dismissed the thought. “So, you’re saying that you’re the only one who’s mad, then, Kei-chan? That’s the situation?”

If that was the case, then recovering from the fight would be simple. If Karuizawa forgave Ayanokouji with a smile, Satou thought, then things would go back to normal.

“Well… Not exactly…” said Karuizawa.

“If you don’t mind talking about it, could you maybe…tell me, like, what the fight was about, exactly?”

Satou wouldn’t be able to understand the issue more deeply without knowing what happened. Karuizawa trusted that Satou was really listening to her, and decided to tell her how it started. It had happened one Saturday night, when she invited Ayanokouji to go out shopping for a Christmas present. When she found out that he was going to spend the day with Ichinose instead, she got seriously ticked off. She couldn’t believe for one second that there was some secret reason for him doing so. After Satou heard the whole story, from beginning to end, she quietly closed her eyes. Then, she forcefully slapped both her knees with her palms.

“I see… Okay, so Ayanokouji-kun is definitely the one in the wrong!” she declared with confidence. That was the opinion of a pure girl who didn’t show any consideration for the other person’s feelings or circumstances.

“I-I know, right?!” cried Karuizawa. Her facial expression had a little of its sunny brightness back, now that she had an ally on her side.

“You’re darn right. He’s got a girlfriend! No matter what the circumstances are, he and Ichinose going out alone together is totally not okay! You should absolutely have said no to that! Or, at the very least, you should have made him take you with him, Kei-chan! Or have some other guys or girls around!”

It was no wonder that Satou was so angry. On the contrary, it was a case where she should have been angry.

“I mean, he just met up with Ichinose-san, and he wasn’t shy about it at all… And on top of that, he wouldn’t even tell me what they were doing…” said Karuizawa.

How anxious and worried had Karuizawa been from when she heard about Ayanokouji going out with Ichinose until today? Regardless, she had poured herself into studying, just as she was instructed to do, and persevered until today.

“So, um, Ichinose-san… She’s not going out with anybody, is she?” asked Karuizawa.

That was an uncertainty that Karuizawa couldn’t deal with herself. “Anybody.” By “anybody,” she wasn’t referring to Ayanokouji. It was a word uttered from Karuizawa’s desire to escape from this, her hope that there was some other guy out there that Ichinose was with.

“…I don’t think I’ve heard anything,” Satou replied. “She’s pretty popular at our school, so I think we’d find out right away if she started going out with somebody… Y’know?”

“…Yeah, you’re right.” After confirming the fact that Ichinose wasn’t with anyone once again, Karuizawa lowered her eyes, downcast.

“Ugh…!” Unable to deal with it anymore, Satou hugged Karuizawa.

“Wh—Maya-chan?!”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Kei-chan!”

“…Thank you. But I know I have my share of fault, too. I should really have listened to him more honestly and understood him. If I did, then…it wouldn’t have turned into a fight.”

She should just have responded with a smile, said, “Okay, let’s go shopping for a Christmas present next week,” and grabbed him by the arm. She looked back in regret. If she could go back in time, she thought, that’s definitely what she’d do instead.

From Satou’s point of view, Karuizawa Kei was cute. In terms of pure looks, she was a girl who stood at the top. When they had first started school, there were times when Satou disliked her deep down, thinking that Karuizawa was a loose girl who cozied up to Hirata, that she was domineering and heavy-handed, and that she had a nasty personality, and was the sort of person who wanted to assert dominance over other people.

However, having come to like that same person, and having opened up to her, Satou understood. She had come to feel instead that this girl just put up a strong front, and that she had a charming personality, despite appearances. Satou could confidently say that even if other girls tried to go for Ayanokouji, there was usually no way that Karuizawa would lose. However, it was a different story when her opponent was Ichinose Honami, of all people. If Ichinose did take a liking to Ayanokouji, then she couldn’t eliminate the possibility that Ayanokouji would switch from Karuizawa to Ichinose.

“Hey… Do you maybe want to do a little investigating?” Satou asked. “You know, talk to people in Ichinose-san’s class.”

It was possible that they’d see something they were afraid of, or didn’t want to see, but if this sort of thing were to happen again even after Karuizawa made up with Ayanokouji, she’d go through the worry and anxiety all over again. If they found out that Ichinose had absolutely no desire to be with him, though, then in that case…

“Yes, plea… A-actually, no, let’s not.”

Regardless, Karuizawa’s anxiety won out, and she declined Satou’s offer.

Then, as if to shake off these unpleasant feelings, Karuizawa quickly stood up.

“Okay,” she decided. “I’m going to try and not think about this anymore. I’m going to have lots of fun with you starting now, Maya-chan, and I’ll go see Kiyotaka tonight. Then we will definitely, absolutely, positively make up!”

“That’s the spirit! I’ve got your back, girl!”

The two of them shared a laugh together, but a moment later, the phone in Karuizawa’s hand vibrated. Karuizawa, thinking for a moment that it was Ayanokouji, overeagerly opened the chat app on her phone.

“Huh—?”

“What’s up?” asked Satou.

Karuizawa stood completely still, looking at her phone’s screen, her facial expression frozen. Satou immediately looked over at her with concern.