Chapter 9: Harbinger of Awakening

Chapter 9: Harbinger of Awakening

Chapter 9:

Harbinger of Awakening

N EAR THE FACULTY OFFICE, Sakayanagi was quietly waiting by herself.

“You waiting? For Kamuro, I mean,” I asked.

“News spreads quickly,” said Sakayanagi.

“Kitou told me when I stopped by to check on Class A.”

“He’s a man of few words, to be sure. I suppose you can never tell who is friends with whom.”

“Maybe it’s insensitive of me, but I decided to come by and check things out. I was never especially close with Kamuro, but this’ll be the last time I ever see her. I thought I’d just say goodbye, even if only briefly.”

“Is that so?” said Sakayanagi.

The truth was that I didn’t care about saying goodbye to Kamuro. I’m not sentimental. It was an excuse Sakayanagi couldn’t refuse. We stood shoulder to shoulder, staring at the door to the faculty office.

“Knowing you, Ayanokouji-kun, I’m sure you’ve figured out what happened just from observing the results.”

“Yeah. I have a pretty good idea. Were you able to identify who was responsible?”

“Yes. That has been taken care of.”

“I see,” I replied.

I was sure she’d take care of the culprit in her usual, exacting manner. Before long, just at the cusp of sunset, Kamuro nonchalantly strolled out of the office. Perhaps she hadn’t thought anyone would be there, because there was a look of bewilderment on her face.

“What are you two doing here?” she asked.

“I was waiting for you, Masumi-san. Am I not allowed?” asked Sakayanagi.

“Not like I could stop you if I wanted, but why?” asked Kamuro.

Kamuro seemed to have accepted her fate more readily than I’d have expected.

“With regret, I bid you farewell today. I wanted to have one last talk with you,” said Sakayanagi.

“Oh god, don’t tell me—even you have pangs of conscience? Yeah, right. No, thanks. And what about you, Ayanokouji?” asked Kamuro.

“I’m here on an educational field trip,” I replied.

“Huh? …Ugh. Incomprehensible until the end, I guess.”

“A student that I didn’t expect to get expelled is being expelled. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t curious,” I replied.

“Unexpected? I’m a shoplifter. You’d think I would be at the top of the list,” said Kamuro.

“That’s in the past. You weren’t at the bottom of the rankings, and I didn’t know what method Sakayanagi would use in choosing who to eliminate. Nothing about this was expected.”

I refrained from mentioning it here, but Kamuro was also close to Sakayanagi.

“She was chosen via drawing lots,” explained Sakayanagi.

“That’s also—”

“You find it unlike me?” interrupted Sakayanagi.

“Not sure. I’d like to ask Kamuro how she feels about it being pure chance.” I wasn’t sure if she would answer honestly, but it was worth a shot.

“God, you’re oblivious.”

Perhaps she was taken off guard by being asked about her feelings. She paused to think.

“I dunno, I guess it just feels weird, is all. Up until this morning, things at school were just normal. I was just thinking about stupid, worthless stuff like how I was going to spend my next day off. Then I get expelled in this totally wild way, out of the blue.”

She hadn’t had any sense of impending danger. She was both safe in her class and had seen other people expelled, so that threat was normalized for her. Even Sakayanagi probably didn’t think that she was going to lose.

“The fault lies with me. I did this to you,” said Sakayanagi.

“Uh, no, don’t be like that,” said Kamuro.

Kamuro immediately recoiled at anything from Sakayanagi approaching an apology.

“Look, I have no intention of blaming you for it or anything. I don’t want you to do anything about it. Besides, ever since I got here, I realized I wouldn’t care if I did get expelled,” said Kamuro.

Kamuro started out a delinquent. Perhaps she had firmly resolved herself to be practical about this, because she seemed very easygoing about the entire process. It didn’t seem like she wanted to stand around talking in front of the faculty office forever, because she started heading off without a word. Sakayanagi, who didn’t have strong legs, chased after Kamuro, pushing herself for a few seconds. I was going to be heading in the same direction anyway to return to the dorms, so I figured I might as well follow.

“I had been waiting for you, to let you vent out a complaint or two,” said Sakayanagi.

“Mind your business,” replied Kamuro.

“What do you plan to do after leaving this school?” asked Sakayanagi.

“Seems like there are a few high schools out there that’ll accept you as a transfer student if you pass their exams, even if you’ve been expelled elsewhere. My parents are annoying as hell about it, like ‘You’ve got to go to high school!’ so I guess I’ll give it a shot,” said Kamuro.

Kamuro had committed herself to a new path very quickly. Gradually, the distance between Kamuro and Sakayanagi widened. Sakayanagi tried to walk hurriedly to catch up to Kamuro, but this unfamiliar action caused her to fall forward, throwing out her hands to catch her fall.

“What are you doing?” shouted Kamuro. She looked around, spotted Sakayanagi on the ground, and sighed. After walking back, she gently lifted Sakayanagi to her feet.

“I’m not going to be around anymore to help, so hurry up and find a replacement for me.”

“I understand… Masumi-san?” said Sakayanagi.

“What?” asked Kamuro, sounding like she was annoyed.

“No, nothing,” said Sakayanagi.

Sakayanagi was about to say something, but she decided against it. Kamuro, narrowing her eyes in confusion, picked up Sakayanagi’s cane, handed it to her, and then went on her way once more. Again, Sakayanagi started chasing after Kamuro, limping.

“Do you have anything you wish to say?” asked Sakayanagi.

Kamuro turned around at the entryway.

“Huh? What, you want me to blame you or something? Like ‘Why’d you expel me?’ Something like that?”

“That’s not what I mean. I have a responsibility to listen,” said Sakayanagi.

“Of all the stupid—”

Kamuro was about to end the conversation right there, but she stopped as she met Sakayanagi’s eyes.

“Ugh, god. You… You’re smart, but you’re also really dumb in some ways, you know?” said Kamuro.

“It is inexcusable to call me ‘stupid’; I cannot let that pass. What do you mean by that?” asked Sakayanagi.

“If you ‘have a responsibility to listen’ or whatever, do you think you could, yanno, actually listen?” snapped Kamuro.

Luckily, Sakayanagi clammed up there.

“All right then, I’ve got something to say. I don’t have any attachment to this school or anything, but promise me just one thing.”

“Promise? Promise what?” asked Sakayanagi.

“This isn’t for my sake, but make sure anyone who betrays the class ends up the same way I did. Can you promise me that?”

“Is that what you wish from me?”

“Yeah. Just that. Can you do it?” asked Kamuro.

“I promise. I will never, ever forgive traitors. I promise to eliminate every single one of them, without fail. And, of course, I will ensure that it does not come at the cost of our class standing.”

Kamuro nodded once in response to Sakayanagi’s oath, and then turned her attention to me. I’d been hanging back behind.

“You’re on the hook too, Ayanokouji. You’re a witness. Hold her feet to the fire.”

“I’m not sure why this is my responsibility, but sure, I accept,” I replied.

“Yeah. Okay, then good. Sorry, but I’m done now. I’m not a student at this school anymore, and so I’m not your business any longer, got it?” said Kamuro.

With that, Kamuro walked away, ignoring Sakayanagi who was taking the time to get ready to change her shoes so she could follow. Kamuro disappeared from view, not stopping as she made her way to the dormitory. By tomorrow morning, Kamuro would no longer be here at this school. I’m sure it wasn’t just Kamuro who was in denial. Nobody was prepared to lose her.

“She stayed true to herself until the end,” said Sakayanagi.

“Yeah,” I replied.

“…I will be taking a while longer yet. Please go on ahead and return to the dormitory,” said Sakayanagi.

I left the school building after Kamuro. I supposed Kamuro was more than just a classmate to Sakayanagi after all.

9.1

A FTER WALKING A BIT, I arrived near the bench where I had met Morishita a week or so earlier. Now, it was deserted, so I sat on the bench alone and waited for ten minutes or so. The person I was waiting for appeared, though walking at a slower pace than usual. Normally, she would have been attentive, but her field of vision was narrower today.

“It really took you a long time to get ready,” I remarked.

When I called out to her, she jumped in surprise, but she quickly hid that emotion.

“Were you waiting for me, by chance…?” she asked.

“Yeah. I forgot to ask you how you felt about all this.”

“I see. I suppose you don’t get to see Class A lose often.”

“You did all you could to read your opponents. You spotted the weaknesses in the other classes and exploited them, and your defensive predictions were great. You clearly outperformed the other three leaders.”

“But I lost,” said Sakayanagi.

“True.”

“It is unfortunate. I haven’t felt any change in my mental or emotional state. Not one. If the reason for my defeat was due to a lack of ability on my part, things would be different, but that wasn’t the case.”

“If it’s just a matter of winning or losing, sure. But don’t you think it’s different when someone might be expelled?”

“If someone got eliminated during the exam and that class lost, one of the eliminated students would be expelled. I knew that from the beginning,” said Sakayanagi.

Sakayanagi refused to admit it, but I pressed her. “Even so, for you, defeat is… I’m sure that Kamuro getting expelled was unexpected.”

“I hope you aren’t underestimating me. It’s true that Masumi-san worked by my side for the past two years, but she was hardly an exceptional student, much less even an obedient one. Her being expelled has no impact on the class whatsoever,” said Sakayanagi with a smile.

“This isn’t like you, Sakayanagi. You seem nowhere near your usual composed self.”

“Is that so? I disagree.”

“Why would I be here if you weren’t shaken? You should have known I knew the moment you saw me here. I wouldn’t be here pointlessly.”

“I admit your insight is brilliant, but don’t you think you might be overreaching?”

“I wonder,” I replied.

When I refused to budge, even Sakayanagi seemed a little rattled by the fact that I wasn’t convinced.

“Masumi-san’s expulsion has affected my mind. Is that what you’re suggesting?”

“Pretty much, yes.”

“Ridiculous,” answered Sakayanagi.

“I understand that you don’t want to admit it. If you do, then you would have to say you messed up.” And she would have to feel regret that she didn’t choose someone else.

“You’re so strong that you can’t sympathize with the weakness of other people. You’re repulsed by it.”

“I don’t want to hear that from you of all people, Ayanokouji-kun.”

“Yes, we have that in common. But you stand between the extremes. You’re still human and only understand yourself so well.”

There were many similarities between us, but there were also many differences.

“What are you getting at? What is it you ultimately want to say to me, Ayanokouji-kun? You don’t think I’d benefit from being weaker, do you? Do you think that I should have acted selfishly, saying that I wanted Masumi-san to stay?” asked Sakayanagi.

“Selfishness isn’t a virtue in a leader, no. But if you had long-term winning in mind, then yeah, you should have kept her. For the sake of your own strength the right choice would have been to have kept Kamuro. You should have laid out reasons to have expelled someone else, whether your metric was by OAA standards or another of your choosing.”

Her own pride had gotten in the way. In the face of an unexpected loss, she made a decision that prioritized keeping her composure so she could act like it didn’t matter to her who disappeared. A hand, when cut off, still itches. Sakayanagi would have to feel it the rest of her time here.

“Don’t trouble yourself. This doesn’t affect me in the slightest. I will not lose again,” said Sakayanagi.

“No, you’ll lose. At this rate, when you go into the final exams at the end of the year, it’ll be a repeat of what just happened.”

There was a big change coming, but Sakayanagi was in denial.

“I see. I understand what you’re after, Ayanokouji-kun. You’re trying to hurt me. That’s why you want me to feel weak, so you’re trying to rattle me… Right?” asked Sakayanagi.

“Why would I need you to be weak, Sakayanagi?” I asked.

“Because it’s inconvenient for you for Class A to remain far, far ahead of the others, isn’t it? For your own ends, you need all of the classes in close competition. That’s your goal, isn’t it?”

“You’re not completely wrong, but that’s not all.”

“What else is there?”

“Whether Class A is in the lead at the moment doesn’t concern me. My objective is to bring out the maximum potential in each class. Whether we’re talking about Ryuuen, or Ichinose, or you, Sakayanagi, I’m going to meddle to fulfill that goal.”

“…I don’t like these comments you’re making. As if I need your help.”

“That’s why I’m here. To help.”

Sakayanagi stopped objecting. She was clever, but here she only pretended to understand.

“Kamuro was a bigger deal than you thought on the surface, and that was your mistake. You assumed that she was no different from the rest of the common riffraff—no, actually, that’s exactly why you had them pull lots. You wanted to convince yourself.”

She should have forged ahead unapologetically. She should have been honest with herself, even if it meant she’d garner resentment for being unfair. Of course, her arrogance had been her downfall.

“I…”

Sakayanagi averted her gaze. She stared off into the distance and exhaled quietly.

“In all my years of compulsory education in primary school and junior high school, I had never made a single friend. I simply couldn’t relate to these simple, crude beings, with their low level of intelligence. It is no different even at this school. Masumi-san, Hashimoto-kun, and Kitou-kun are no different. I keep them physically close, but that was simply so I can use them as extensions of myself, as my hands and feet. They’re only that. I thought they were no different from complete strangers.”

For all of Sakayanagi’s life, she didn’t recognize the people around her as friends. However, the line between a stranger and a friend was a blurry one. No one could truly define it.

“So I thought it would’ve been the same, no matter who disappeared…” said Sakayanagi.

She fell silent. By now, I was sure that Sakayanagi could see the truth.

“Apparently, Masumi-san had been my friend, and I didn’t recognize it until now,” said Sakayanagi.

Even though she used the same word as before, friend , the weight of it as she spoke now was so much heavier than it’d ever been. Sakayanagi had just assumed that, clever as she was, there was no way she could have been touched by someone like Kamuro.

“…In any case, this is unlike me,” said Sakayanagi.

“Maybe so. But now you’re aware. Now that you realize losing Kamuro has made you weaker, you can become stronger.”

It would’ve been bad if she were aware, but unable to change.

“You’ve been giving advice to various people behind the scenes like this, haven’t you? It’s no wonder everyone is growing,” said Sakayanagi.

“Everyone has some room left to go, I think.”

Sakayanagi had nothing further to say, so she slowly and politely bowed her head. I could sense a firmness in that action, like I cannot stay with you a moment longer. I acquiesced, and as I watched her figure recede into the distance, I sat down on the bench again.

“In the end, Kamuro’s expulsion will do some good,” I thought aloud.

There wasn’t anyone else out of the rabble who could have affected Sakayanagi’s feelings like this. The Class Points were tight, and she no longer controlled the field. Each class was getting stronger, growing in its ability to fight. The rest was up to Sakayanagi herself; she had to think and mature. It was time to grapple with feelings she had never had before.

Ryuuen had pulled off his mask and become something more. Rather than changing his previous approach, he was evolving his old one. He would continue to mercilessly exert his power over those around him. There were only about two months left until our final exams.

“It’s time to make some careful preparations.”

For Karuizawa Kei.

For Ichinose Honami.

For the classes.

It was time to make an impact. When I was gone, I was going to be remembered.