37. Entertainment District

​"LISTEN UP! I AM A GOD, WHILE ALL OF YOU ARE TRASH!"

​Hana's ears rang as she immediately regretted every life decision that had led her to this exact moment. Standing next to Tanjiro, Zenitsu, and Inosuke, she stared blankly at the man before them, the Sound Hashira, Uzui Tengen.

​The sun gleamed against his toned arms as he gestured dramatically, his flashy jewelry clinking with every move. His muscles seemed to radiate confidence on their own.

​Hana blinked slowly. Why....why did I agree to this?

​"First thing you need to keep in mind, drill it into your brains! SCREW IT IN THERE!" Uzui thundered, his voice echoing through the training grounds. "You will become dogs when I order you to! You'll become monkeys when I order! Humor me as you hunch over and never stop singing my praise!"

​Hana blinked again, a faint twitch appearing at the corner of her mouth. He's serious. Oh my god, he's actually serious.

​"LET ME SAY IT ONE MORE TIME! I AM GOD!"

​There was a long, painful silence.
​Zenitsu's jaw dropped. "This guy is... a complete weirdo..." he whispered, horrified.

​Then, of course, Tanjiro, the sweet and innocent Tanjiro, raised his hand. "Um, what exactly is your domain over as a god?" he asked earnestly.

​Hana's eyes widened looking at her brother in sheer disbelief.

​Uzui blinked once, then burst out laughing. "A fine question! I have high hopes for you. I am the God who rules over Flamboyance, the God of Festivals!"

​He's an idiot, he must be ruling over idiots, Zenitsu thought.

​"I'm the Lord of the Mountains!" Inosuke suddenly said proudly, puffing out his chest. "Nice to meet you, God of Festivals!"

​Uzui stared at him for a solid three seconds. "What are you talking about? You're weirding me out."

​Zenitsu's face twisted. "NO, YOU'RE THE SAME AS HIM!"

​"What, what did you say?!" Inosuke said, lunging at the Hashira.

​"Inosuke, don't!" Tanjiro urged as he held Inosuke back.

​"Let me go, Gonpachiro!"

​"You're creepy," Uzui gave Inosuke a plain look of disgust.

​Hana sighed softly, rubbing her temple. "This is going to be a long day."

​Uzui turned. "We don't have all day! Enough talk, let's get going!"

​The Entertainment District

​The rickshaw wheels rattled against the stone path as the four of them rode toward their destination. Every corner of the street was alive: lanterns swaying in the evening wind, laughter and music spilling into the air. The scent of perfume and grilled food blended strangely.

​Hana peeked out the side of the carriage, eyes widening slightly. So this is Yoshiwara.

​"Alright, listen up!" Uzui said, his voice commanding even over the street noise. "Keep a low profile. We're only here to observe. Do not get off this rickshaw!"
​Which meant, of course, Zenitsu immediately jumped out.

​"ZENITSU, NO!" Tanjiro cried, leaning forward running after Zenitsu.

​Inosuke's head popped up, eyes sparkling with curiosity. "If he's going, then I'm going too!"

​"Inosuke!" Hana shouted after him, exasperated.

​Uzui turned back to find an empty rickshaw. His eye twitched. "Those damned brats!"

​Hana and Tanjiro ran through the crowd, looking for the duo.

​"Where did they go?" Hana exclaimed, panting.

​Before Tanjiro could respond, Uzui's voice boomed through the chaos.
​"HEY! YELLOW HEAD! STOP RIGHT THERE! DON'T YOU MOVE!"

​Hana followed the sound, saw Uzui dragging Zenitsu by the collar and soon enough, they regrouped.

​"The Yoshiwara Entertainment District," Uzui announced, gesturing broadly. "Where men and women drown in decadence and desire, love and loathing, a town of the night! Flashy, ain't it?"

​Inosuke blinked dizzily as he came to. "Wh...what the hell is this place?! There are people everywhere!"

​He started hyperventilating, then screamed, "PIG ASSAULT!" and charged into the crowd.

​"WHAT, CALM DOWN, YOU IDIOT!" Uzui barked, instantly knocking him out again with a chop.

​Uzui sighed and tossed Inosuke over his shoulder again. "Where's the blond one and Hana?!"

​Tanjiro froze, turning only to realize that Hana and Zenitsu were nowhere to be seen. "...They're gone."

​Hana wandered through the glowing streets. The lights reflected in her eyes as she searched. Where did that idiot run off to? The nerve of him to drag me away and then disappear himself.

​"Hey there." a voice drawled. ​Hana turned to see a man in his early thirties leaned casually against a wall, smirking.
​"You're pretty," he said smoothly. "I like you. How much are you? I'm sure you're expensive. I'll willing to pay however they charge for you."

​Her face went blank. "...Excuse me?"

​"Oh, don't be shy," he said, stepping closer.

​Hana's eyes narrowed dangerously. The air around her shifted, pressure spiking. "I'm not a ornament to be appraised, you bastard. My life is worth more than your entire miserable existence, and if you take one more step, I'll show you exactly how little value you hold in this world."

​The man flinched, his face suddenly paling. "I... I'm sorry!" he stammered, stumbling backward before running off.

​Hana exhaled through her nose. Men.
​Then she spotted a familiar flash of yellow.

​"Zenitsu!"

​Zenitsu was wandering aimlessly, his eyes sparkling like stars. "There are so many beautiful women here," he sighed dreamily. Then his cheeks flushed. "But not as beautiful as Hana-chan."

​He was mid-daydream when Uzui's massive hand slammed into the back of his head.

​"SHUT IT!" Uzui snapped, dragging him back toward the others.

​Uzui finally sighed, having the group back together, he turned them. "Take a good look. This place sleeps during the day but shines so brilliantly at night. It's the perfect place for demons to hide, isn't it?"

​His tone shifted slightly, more serious now.

​"The courtesans here are usually women who were sold off because of poverty or debt. In return, they're given food, clothing, and shelter. As their careers advance, some are bought out by the wealthy. But behind all this glamour..."
​His eyes hardened. "Demons thrive in places like this."

​Wisteria House

​Inside the Wisteria House, the group gathered around a low wooden table.
​Uzui sat cross-legged in the room, arms folded, his expression serious for once. His usual flamboyance dimmed into focus.

​"Listen up," he began, his deep voice echoing slightly in the quiet room. "Once we infiltrate the Red Light District, our first priority is finding my wives. I'll find info on the demons in the meantime."
​The silence that followed was deafening.

​Zenitsu's face twisted in disbelief. "...What? Unacceptable."

Tengen's eyes narrowed "What?"

​"This is unbelievable!" Zenitsu shouted, slamming his hands on the table. "You can't just use your subordinates to look for personal brides!"

​Tengen's brow twitched. "What are you talking about?"

​Zenitsu pointed at him, trembling in outrage as Tanjiro tried to calm him down. "No, let me get this straight! You're telling us to risk our lives to find your wives?! No one would even want someone as bizarre and eccentric as you! You're telling demon hunters to find brides for you?!"

​Uzui's vein pulsed visibly. "You're misunderstanding, you noisy brat!" he snapped. "They infiltrated the district for the mission! They're kunoichi, trained to gather information!"

​Zenitsu squinted suspiciously. "You're telling me you have wives? It's just in your head, isn't it?"

​Uzui's patience officially hit zero. "You little punk." He hurled a pile of letters straight at Zenitsu's face. "These are the messages they sent through crows. Do these look imaginary to you?!"

​Hana caught one letter, blinking at the delicate handwriting. "There's...so many of them."

​Tanjiro picked one up too, examining the seals. "It must've been quite a while."

​He exhaled and looked up again. "Actually, I have three wives."

​"Three?!" Zenitsu shrieked. "THREE?! YOU HAVE THREE WIVES?! YOU BASTARD, HOW CAN YOU HAVE THREE WIVES?! DO YOU THINK YOU CAN FOOL ME?!"

​Uzui's fist slammed into Zenitsu's head, knocking him out cold. "Do you have a problem with that?"

​Zenitsu collapsed face-first onto the floor.

​Uzui ignored the chaos. "They keep reminding me in these messages to try my best and not stand out when I arrive. That's what I'm telling you."

​Tanjiro raised a hand. "What exactly are we supposed to do, Uzui-san?"

​Uzui smirked. "We're going to get into disguises. My wives are talented kunoichi. They went deep undercover in three different brothels to investigate the demon activity. But after a while, contact was lost. We've narrowed it down to three suspicious houses. You'll be sent into each of them."

​Uzui continued. "Suma is at Tokito House, Makio at Ogimoto House, and Hinatsuru at Kyogoku House."

​Inosuke crossed his arms, unimpressed. "I bet your wives are dead by now."
​The room froze.

​Hana's and Tanjiro's eyes widened in horror as Uzui's fist came down on Inosuke's head with terrifying force.
​"You loudmouth boar! Don't you ever say something like that again!"

​Inosuke fell next to Zenitsu with a grunt, both now unconscious in a sad little pile.

​Uzui huffed, turning to Tanjiro and Hana. "Idiots. Anyway, that's the plan."
​A polite knock interrupted the chaos.
​"Excuse me," a soft voice called from the door. "I've brought the items you requested."

​Uzui's grin returned. "Perfect timing."

​One Hour Later

​"WHAT IS THIS?! I CAN'T DO THIS!"
​Zenitsu wailed as he stumbled into view, wearing a yellow kimono, his hair tied up in ponytails. His face was caked up by badly applied makeup.

​Inosuke stomped in behind him, also disguised. "This makeup itches! And why are these clothes so tight? It's hot!"

Uzui blinked at them in uncertainty, desperately hoping they'd manage to blend in and his mission wouldn't crash.

​​Tanjiro looked into the mirror. His cheeks were slightly flushed. "Uzui-san, are you sure this is necessary?"

​"Of course! My wives went deep undercover. You'll need to blend in." Uzui gestured flamboyantly toward the mirror.

​Zenitsu gripped Tanjiro's sleeve desperately. "SAVE ME! PLEASE! DON'T LET THEM SEND ME IN LIKE THIS! HANA-CHAN! WHERE'S HANA-CHAN?!"

​"Right here."

​The door slid open.

​The room fell silent.

​Hana stood there, dressed in a soft-colored kimono that complemented her complexion. Her makeup was light but elegant, her hair neatly styled with subtle ornaments. She looked every bit the perfect courtesan in disguise, except for the faint nervousness in her eyes.
​Uzui's grin widened. Tanjiro's eyes sparkled. Zenitsu froze like a statue. Even Inosuke agreed that she looked beautiful.

​Hana shifted nervously. "Say something. Please."

​Zenitsu practically exploded, shrieking in delight. "HANA-CHAAAAAAAN! YOU LOOK SO PRETTY!" He swooned with hearts in his eyes.

​She turned red instantly. "Zenitsu, shut up!"

​Uzui laughed, clapping his hands. "Excellent! Now we can begin."

​Tanjiro smiled softly. "You really do look beautiful, Hana."

​Her eyes softened. "Thank you, Tanjiro," she said quietly.

​Uzui's plan worked. They were all succeafully sold into different houses.
​Hana and Tanjiro were sold into the Tokito House. The owner was extremely pleased to take in Hana, and even agreed to take Tanjiro.

​Inosuke was at the Ogimoto House.
​"How's this?!" The women asked, looking at Inosuke after the heavy makeup was removed.

​"Incredible!!" the other women gasped.
​Once Inosuke's face was wiped clean of the odd makeup, it revealed the striking face beneath the mask of foundation.
​The woman nodded determinedly. "Her face was painted so weirdly, but this is what she's like when it comes off! We struck gold, got this beauty for cheap!"
​She cooed happily.

​Zenitsu, after a lot of convincing, was sold into the Kyogoku House. The owner, infatuated by Tengen's looks, agreed to take in the boy, much to his distaste.

​He was now playing a shamisen with intense aggression, his every motion drawing wide-eyed astonishment from the other girls performing beside him.

​"Sh-she's really good at playing the shamisen," one woman murmured.
​Another nodded. "You're right, it's impactful. Is she the new girl?" she asked.

​"Apparently... she has good ears. She can play whatever she hears perfectly, whether on the shamisen or the koto."

​"She's really ugly, how did she manage to get in." One said critically.

​"I heard that the guy that sold her to our brothel was super hot."

​"Really? I wish I could see him," she squealed.

​The brothel madam just spaced out at their remarks. ​"No, I understand the feeling. This girl will be going places," an older lady smiled mischievously, sipping her kiseru. "She's determined to get back at the man that abandoned her. Girls like her are strong."

You can make her clean the toilets or whatever, please take her in, I'll even give her for free!" Zenitsu hissed remembering Tengen's words.

​Zenitsu played the shamisen harder.
I swear I'll get back at that man! I'm going to be the greatest Oiran in Yoshiwara! He almost destroyed the shamisen strings from sheer livid energy.