2 - I Want to Eat Rice Pudding

“Would you please teach me how to have sex?”

Keina suddenly stuck her face in front of Akuto.

They were in his room, on a weekend. And Akuto had just woken up.

He’d heard the sound of his door opening and sat up in bed, just in time for Keina to jump on top of him.

“Huh?”

“I said, will you please teach me how to have sex?” Keina said again.

—Um...

Akuto tried to calm himself down.

She didn’t seem to be offering him anything. He knew from Fujiko that when a girl wanted that from you, she made it a little more obvious. Keina’s face was a little too innocent.

“I read about it in this article, ‘How to Get Prettier By Having Sex.’ And since I want to be prettier, I think we should have sex, don’t you?” Keina used her handbook to call up a mana screen with the article on it, and showed it to Akuto.

It was a girl’s fashion magazine. The article she’d been talking about was displayed on the screen.

“If you read it... I think you know what it involves...” Akuto said hesitantly. Keina nodded to indicate that she did.

“I know the theory. But there’s a big difference between theory and practice.”

—Theory? What theory?

“H-How much do you know about it?” Akuto had no idea what to say, so he just put his fingers up against the mana screen to page through the article.

—Yeah, I guess it doesn’t go into much detail...

It was a magazine for everyday consumers, so it didn’t go into a lot of explicit detail. The most it had were manga-style drawings of a man and women naked from the waist up.

“There’s a lot of technical vocabulary, it looks like. There’s all these words I don’t know. I want you to teach me those too, for example. V—”

“Vermeer,” Akuto cut her off quickly before she could finish. “He’s famous for his painting of the milkmaid.”

“That’s right. Vermeer. And it did say something about milk, too. I guess it’s good for your skin? And the opposite of it is P—”

“Picasso. He was an abstract painter. Very famous.”

“I see. You know a lot about it, huh? I can see why everybody said you’re an expert when it comes to sex.”

—Is that what everybody says?

Akuto almost got depressed, but it was more important to figure out a way to get Keina out of his room.

“Um... Anyway, it’s not something you do early in the morning.”

“It’s not? The article says that you should do it all day if you want to be really pretty.”

—What kind of magazine is this?

“N-N-No. You need to get married before you can do that.”

“That’s strange. It didn’t say anything about being married. Actually, it said that if you do it with somebody who’s married to someone else, it’s more dangerous and thrilling, and will make you even prettier...”

—This is just getting worse by the minute...

“Both people need to consent, or you can’t do it.”

“Then just tell me how it’s done, okay?” Keina brought her face even closer to his.

“Listen, um...” Akuto had completely run out of ideas when he heard a voice from above.

“I heard what you were discussing,” Korone said as she popped her head out from the cabinet up near the ceiling. That was where she slept in Akuto’s room at night.

—And now it’s going to get even worse...

Akuto thought, but before he could stop her, Korone landed on the bed and took a canola flower out from her bag.

“Listen carefully. A flower has two reproductive organs, a pistil and a stamen...”

Korone began her sex ed class with a perfectly serious look on her face, and Keina nodded back, serious as well.

“Oh... And then what?”

“This stamen contains pollen, which is received by the pistil...”

“Gah! Enough already!” Akuto finally got up and began to push Keina and Korone out of the room.

“Oh, darling. How rude of you.”

“I’m not done explaining...”

“Please, just stop. I need to think today, by myself,” Akuto said. It wasn’t just an excuse to get rid of them, it was really how he felt.

“Think by yourself?” Korone asked. Akuto nodded.

“I’m sorry. Can you leave me alone, just for this morning?”

“I’m afraid that, as your observer, I’d like to at least know what you’re thinking about,” Korone said. Akuto thought for a minute before answering.

“About my future. You could say it has to do with whether or not I’ll be able to graduate from the Academy.”

“That’s very serious. I’ll make sure no one enters your room this morning, then,” Korone said.

“While you’re doing that, I’ll talk to Korone about how to have sex, okay? I’ll come back this afternoon and we can do it!” Keina said cheerfully.

“No, you don’t have to do that,” Akuto said, looking exasperated. He turned to Korone and added, “And... please don’t explain to her, if you can avoid it.”

Korone must have heard him, but she didn’t react at all.

○

“If you use things like this, you can become healthier,” Korone said. When she hit the button, the stick-like object she was showing to Keina began to vibrate.

Keina took the vibrating object and began to spin it around.

“Ooh! It certainly feels like it could make you healthy, yes!”

Akuto’s room was on the first floor, and there was a grassy lawn outside. That’s where Korone and Keina were sitting. Of course, they were doing their own sex education class.

“Excuse me... What are you doing with that thing? It’s making me uncomfortable,” Fujiko interrupted them.

“There’s no reason to be uncomfortable. It’s simply a massage device.”

“...Yes, I think that’s what the packaging says for most of those things.”

It wasn’t unusual for Korone to be waving around some kind of strange object, so Fujiko simply changed the subject rather than ask any more questions.

“Is Akuto inside?”

“He is, but he asked me not to let anyone in until the afternoon.”

“...Is he still mad?”

“No, he said he had an important decision to make about his future, and he wanted to think. It seems to have something to do with whether or not he’s going to quit school.”

“What?!” Fujiko shouted, before blurting out exactly what came to mind, “Then he’s finally ready to become the Demon King and join forces with me, isn’t he?”

“I don’t know if that’s really the case,” Korone said coldly, but Fujiko wasn’t listening.

“Hahahaha! Victory is mine! Now, it’s time for me to start planning the future!”

“The future?” Keina asked. She seemed confused.

“That’s right. My future with Akuto, of course!”

“I don’t know how far in the future you’re talking about, but darling’s having sex with me this afternoon,” Keina said innocently.

Fujiko froze. Her cheeks were twitching, like she couldn’t believe what she’d just heard.

“Wh-What?”

“I said, he’s going to have sex with me! He’s going to put his seed inside me and fertilize me!” Keina was smiling. “He’s going to use lots of toys, too! And then I’m going to milk him and drink it, and my skin will get silky smooth!”

“Wh... Wh... What did you say?!” Fujiko screamed, shaking her head frantically. Then she stuck her finger out at Keina and said, “You’re lying! You have to be lying! If you keep on lying like that, I’ll roll you up in a mat and throw you in the Tamazon river, you... you... hussy!”

Keina just gazed at her densely.

“Oh! What’s gotten into you? I’m just telling you my plans for the afternoon!”

“Well, you’re lying about them! If I just go and ask Akuto...”

“You can’t. He said not to let anyone in this morning,” Keina said.

Fujiko looked at her with bloodshot eyes, then she slapped her hands as if she was realizing something. She got a look in her eyes like a murderer who’d found a new target, and whispered to herself.

“That’s right. Which means if I get rid of you during the morning, I don’t need to know what Akuto is thinking, do I?”

“Wh-What?!” Keina realized she was in danger, and stood up and began to back away.

“Be a good girl and let me kill you! For the sake of my future with Akuto!” Fujiko raised up her right hand.

But, a moment before she could do anything, Keina screamed and fired a ball of light. Fujiko hadn’t been expecting an attack, and was blown backwards by the explosion before she could react.

“Kyah!” Fujiko screamed as she flew across the lawn.

But she hadn’t taken much damage; only a part of her clothing had been burnt.

“N-Now you’ve done it!” Fujiko stood up and instantly attacked Keina back in the same way.

Keina just barely managed to dodge the attack, and quickly ran away.

“Nooooo! What’s going on?!”

○

“I heard some noise on the lawn in front of the boys dorm so I came to check it out but... what happened here?”

Junko arrived shortly after Fujiko began chasing Keina around. The only person left on the lawn was Korone.

“Fujiko Eto and Keina Doronz are battling over Akuto Sai,” Korone said.

“I wish I could say that’s surprising, but it isn’t. Why didn’t you just have him stop them?” Junko pointed to Akuto’s room.

“No, he instructed me to let no one bother him this morning.”

“... He can be such a pain sometimes. What’s the problem here?”

“The two of them fought over a simple misunderstanding, but the reason Akuto is staying in his room seems to be that he’s considering a decision that may lead to him quitting school.”

“Is that true?!” Junko asked. Korone nodded.

“Yes.”

“W-Wait a second. What’s he worried about?”

“I don’t know the details. He didn’t tell me,” Korone said.

—I see... Maybe I did put too much pressure on him. But he could’ve at least talked to me... When I think about it, he’s been treated in a way that would cause a lot of people to never want to leave their rooms. Should I try to help him?

“What are you mumbling to yourself?” Korone asked. Junko gasped.

“N-No, I wasn’t thinking of trying to get on his good side by cheering him up...” When she realized what she was saying, Junko’s face went red.

“I see. You’re free to do what you like, but you’re not getting inside until afternoon,” Korone said.

Junko waved her hands.

“No, no, no! I’m not planning anything like that. It’s true. W-Well, I can wait till afternoon... No, I need to stop the fight, first. Haha... hahaha...”

With that, Junko left.

—I need to stop thinking aloud... No, that doesn’t matter. I need to stop that fight... I-I know. If I can find out why they’re fighting, I can stop it easily. Yes. That’s a great idea. But how... I know. I hate to say it, but if I can get that human stealth bomber to help me... I’ll be able to sneak past Korone and get into his room easily.

Junko nodded to herself.

○

The “human stealth bomber” in question was alone in her room, with a nervous look on her face.

“Hehehehe... This precious meal is mine... and nobody else can have it!”

She was nervous, but grinning. Her red hair was bouncing about happily.

Of course, it was Keena Soga. She was alone in her room, staring at a white gelatin-like meal in an earthenware cup.

“This is the legendary Uonuma Koshihikari rice pudding! There’s so little of it made that it’s almost impossible to get, and I finally got myself some!”

Rice pudding. There were a lot of recipes, but the simplest was to mix sugar and milk with boiled rice, and then cool it. If you make it that way, it tastes exactly how you’d think it would. It was a fairly popular dish overseas, but here in the Empire, where rice was the staple food, it wasn’t very popular.

What Keena was holding was melted rice mixed with coconut milk, which was something similar to an actual dessert, but it still wasn’t a very popular dish. She said it was “rare,” but that only meant that it was so unpopular that only a few were made.

But no matter how unimportant something is, there’s always somebody who loves it. On the rice mailing lists, and rice BBSes, and rice social networks that Keena always frequented, this rice pudding was a legend. The only reason Keena hadn’t been at the café from earlier was that she’d been running around trying to find it.

“Rice pudding is all about the mix between the sweetness of the rice and the sweetness of the sugar, you know? But here you’ve got the sweetness of the coconut milk and the sweetness of the fruit, mixing together in perfect harmony! Hehehe... Heheheh... I haven’t even started eating and already I’m drooling!”

Keena picked up her spoon.

“Alright, it’s time...”

Just then, the door to her room swung open.

“Keena! I need something! Can you give me your help with it?” Junko came inside.

“Huh?”

Keena was so focused on her rice pudding that she didn’t hear what Junko had said properly. Or rather, she only heard the last part.

“Keena! I need something! Can you give me... it?”

“...Give me it?”

“Can you give me your rice pudding?”

“Aaah! Noooo!”

She wasn’t handing over that rice pudding. Keena quickly grabbed her cup and bolted for the door where Junko was standing.

“Hey, what are you doing?”

Junko tried to grab her, but Keena stepped forward with her right leg and dropped down low. When her right foot landed on the ground, she spun around in a half turn while keeping low, and slid right past Junko and out the door.

“What...?!” Junko couldn’t believe it.

Junko was proud of how good she was at melee combat, and someone had just gotten right past her.

“Th-That’s the ancient art of shukuchi!”

Shukuchi. A skill that allowed you to step forward and move your body’s center of gravity past the point where your foot landed, moving you forward several steps in a single moment.

There was no way that Keena could have learned that skill. Her obsession with the rice pudding had caused her body to instinctively select the most suitable way to protect it.

At least, that’s what Junko would say later. In any event, she’d gotten past Junko, and was running down the hall.

“Tch!” Junko chased after her. Of course, Junko was faster. But she knew it wouldn’t be that easy.

“I knew it...!”

Once Keena could get around a corner, she’d disappear before Junko could find her. Keena’s clothes were already scattered down the hallway. If she disappeared there was no way Junko could find her.

“She’s gone...” Junko said. “But why did she run?”

○

“I should be safe now...”

Keena was hiding in the shadow of the boy’s dorm. She was totally naked except for a curtain she’d wrapped around herself. She’d grabbed it from a classroom when she was making her escape.

“Junko won’t follow me to the boy’s dorm. Now, time to eat that pudding!” she said. “I didn’t expect to eat it outside, but I know that rice pudding eaten outside has to be even more delicious...”

Just as she tried to dig her spoon into the white pudding...

BOOOM!

An explosion went off right next to her.

“KEINA!” Fujiko howled angrily. Then she charged at her.

“Huh?! Why?!” Keena started to run.

Fujiko had said “Keina,” but Keena thought, of course, that she was referring to her.

“Wh-Why is Fujiko after me too...?” Keena threw aside her curtain as she began to run, clutching the pudding cup in her hands.

“Keina! Where did you go?!” Fujiko looked around for Keina, her face twisted with rage.

“S-She really is looking for me... Oh no! It can’t be...!” Keena looked down at the rice pudding in her hands.

“She must know I have it! I didn’t expect Junko and Fujiko to find out...”

○

“I don’t understand why you’re chasing after me! If you want to join us for afternoon sex, then the three of us can all do it together!”

Keina was jumping around to dodge Fujiko’s attacks, and firing back balls of light when she could.

“The three of us... That might not be so bad... Wait! I can’t do that! Akuto belongs to me and me alone!”

Fujiko was keeping up with her, attacking violently as she followed Keina. By now, Fujiko was totally serious. She wasn’t using the light balls, which were magic she was bad with. Instead she was slowly cornering Keina with the vials of drugs she always carried with her. She hit Keina’s clothes with a marker drug, and then summoned light balls that would automatically track it.

The other students gathered when they heard the commotion.

“What’s going on?”

“Fujiko’s fighting the exchange student?”

“Let’s help her! Fujiko’s such a nice girl! Something really bad must have happened for her to fight”!

“The exchange student must have done something wrong!”

So said the students, as they prepared to join the fight on Fujiko’s side.

“I-It looks like we’re attracting a crowd!” Keina said. She didn’t know what was going on, but Fujiko’s attitude suddenly changed.

“Everyone, stay back! She suddenly attacked me for no reason! And she was shouting lewd words when she did it, too! She’s like a dangerous beast!” Fujiko yelled.

Of course, all the students believed her.

“Get her!”

“How dare she do that to a gentle girl like Fujiko!”

Suddenly, Keina was being followed by an angry mob. Since it was a boring weekend, the other students in the dorm began to participate in the fun.

“Wh-What’s going on? I didn’t do that! She’s lying!” Keina protested, but nobody listened to her. She was like a rabbit being chased by hunting dogs.

“Nooo! Why is this happening?!” Keina kept running.

And then for a moment, she stood still, unsure of which corner to go down...

THUD!

“Hyah!” And something invisible slammed into her and she tripped.

Of course, it was Keena.

But Keina didn’t have time to stop and think about it; the mob was after her, and she had to flee quickly!

○

“Oww...” Keena had fallen to the ground as well, but she’d managed to protect her rice pudding. In her rush to protect it, she’d ended up naked on the ground with her legs splayed, but she was invisible, so it didn’t matter.

“W-Whew... That was a close one.”

Keena stood up to get away from Keina, who was glancing furtively around and trying to figure out what had happened.

But then Fujiko came rushing towards her, with a massive group of students behind her. Of course, they were after Keina, but unfortunately Keena wasn’t the type of girl who was perceptive enough to figure that out.

“I-I knew it! All these people are after my rice pudding!” Keena said, absolutely sure of it. “I’ll just have to eat it while I run...”

Gulp.

Keena gulped to stop herself from drooling. But then she shook her head.

“No! If I don’t eat it when everything’s just perfect, it would be rude to the craftsmen who made it! So much effort was spent in its creation!”

And so Keena decided to run for real.

“I need to get somewhere where nobody will come... I know! There’s a spot on the roof where it’s locked to keep people out!”

Keena stopped running and started to fly up into the sky.

“Rice pudding on the roof! It’ll be wonderful! Oh, it’s so white and smooth, and just a little sweet, like eating a cloud! Yes, it’s the perfect treat to eat under blue skies! They go together like salmon and grated radish! No, wait! If I start thinking about other foods it will dull my sense of taste! Yes, it goes together like morning dew and ladybugs! I need to get as close to the sky as I can!”

Keena flew upwards, her voice more dazed than ever.

○

“Whew. All they ever do is cause problems.”

Student Council President Lily Shiraishi used a secret key that only she possessed to open up the door to the roof. She’d wanted to go somewhere with a lot of space, where she wouldn’t be bothered. The complaints from the neighbors after the chaos in town had been horrible, and the knights had been on her case, too. She was in a bad mood, so she’d brought a sandbag up to the roof so she could work off some stress.

A lot of the students could use flying magic, but they all followed the rules about going up to the roof. And anyway, the roof had only become off limits recently, after a huge hole had been blown in it during the last war. There were rumors that the high priest of Suhara had died there, and even the students who could fly found the place too creepy to spend any time there.

“Hmm, I was right, this place is empty. I can probably just leave this up here.”

Lily used the same telekinetic power she’d used to bring the sandbag up to the roof to hang it from a pole on the fence. She gave it a few taps to test it, and then wound up a big swing.

“It’s his fault in the first place for going into town.”

Lily slammed a fist into the sandbag, hard. It started to shake with a creaking sound.

“I don’t know what happened there, but I can guess. Fujiko Eto must’ve done something.”

Thud. Thud.

“And then there’s those damn knights!”

Thud. Thud. Thud!

“They’re trying to blame the whole thing on my students to cover up their own corruption!”

Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud!

“It pisses me off! I’m taking calcium pills every day, and it’s still not enough!”

Thudthudthudthudthudthud!

Lily began to tear into the sandbag with incredible force.

That’s when Keena flew up, invisible. She had only heard a portion of what Lily had said.

“She needs more calcium...? Ah! Even the student council president is after my calcium-loaded rice pudding? And she’s hitting that sandbag so hard... She must really want it! But how did the whole school find out about it, I wonder?”

Keena hid in the shadow of the school’s water tower, mumbling to herself.

○

“Over there, Fujiko!” One of the students pointed at the roof.

“That’s where she ran to, huh?” Fujiko ran up the stairs.

The group was following the marker that they thought was attached to Keina’s clothes — but right now, that marker was stuck to Keena’s body. Of course, Fujiko and the other students had no idea.

“The roof? Where we’re not allowed to go?” They realized that the door to the roof was locked.

“It doesn’t matter. They say it’s off limits because the hole hasn’t been repaired. If she’s hiding up there, it means we’ve got her cornered!”

Encouraged by her words, the students used magic to blast down the door. There was a BOOM sound as the door slid across the roof.

“Get her!” Fujiko and her followers all rushed onto the roof. There were 20 of them in all.

“Where are you?!”

“Come out!”

“You can’t escape!”

They began to spread out across the roof, and one of them happened to step on the door that they’d just knocked down. He realized that there was something strange about the way it felt beneath his feet. And then it moved.

“U-Uwah!” he screamed and jumped off.

A shadow appeared from beneath the door — someone had been squished under it when it had been broken down.

“Hey, what the hell are you doing?”

Of course, it was Lily Shiraishi who lifted up the door and stood up. There were blue veins on her forehead, and a glare on her face that would’ve made a hungry, man-eating beast turn and run.

At the Academy, how good you were in a fight meant everything, so as student council president, Lily was one of the best. The whole school knew how scary she was. The students all got a look on their faces like a person gets when the “friend” he thought he was pranking turns out to be a yakuza.

“N-Nothing... We didn’t see you here. We didn’t know you’d be here...”

“What? Are you saying I’m so small you didn’t notice me?”

Lily was being unfair. She was just extremely sensitive about her own height.

“N-No, I didn’t... I’m sorry. I just never notice the little stuff...”

Those were the worst words the student possibly could’ve chosen.

“A-All of you...”

Lily was angry enough to begin with. Now, she put her hand on the brim of her fancy hat. When she turned it around, it was a sign that she was really pissed.

“You’re not leaving here alive!”

The hat was turned around.

In the next moment, 20 people flew into the air at once. Lily’s arms multiplied like a statue of Kannon, stretching out and punching each person ten times in an instant.

“If it were night, I would’ve turned you all into constellations. You’re lucky it’s daytime.”

Just after she said that, the students all landed head first on the ground. And then Lily glared at the last person standing.

“I-I-It was really just a tiny... I mean a minor mistake!” Fujiko tried to say while laughing uncomfortably. Even Fujiko tried to avoid fighting the student council directly.

“Did you just say tiny? Huh?” Lily screamed.

“Heh... heheh... I guess I’ve got no choice, then. Everyone else is unconscious, so I don’t have to hold back!”

Fujiko realized she couldn’t escape, so she decided to fight instead. She tossed off her uniform, revealing her leather bondage outfit underneath.

“Cerberus!” she shouted, and a huge beast appeared on the roof in a blast of wind. The Demon Beasts had been in hiding since the war, but this one was a personal favorite of Fujiko’s, and she’d kept it.

“You want a fight, huh? Well, you’ve got it,” Lily said.

“I didn’t plan on this, but if we’re going to fight, I’m going to fight for real! And if I win, I’m taking the student council presidency!”

By now, the two of them seemed to have completely forgotten what they’d been doing.

Lily faced off with Fujiko, who was now astride Cerberus. Tension began to build between the two. If someone gave a signal, they both would’ve moved at once.

But instead, someone came through the broken door.

“Fujiko! I heard from Korone and Doronz what happened! What do you think you’re doing?!” It was Junko, with Keina trailing behind her.

When Junko was chasing Keena, she’d run across Keina instead, and heard the story from her. All Keina had said, though, was that Fujiko had suddenly attacked her. From Junko’s perspective, she had not the slightest idea why Lily and Fujiko were facing off with one another.

“W-What are you doing?” she asked again.

But neither Lily nor Fujiko knew why they were fighting anymore.

“Hmph. We were fighting about what’s the best side dish for dinner tonight.”

This was Lily’s idea of a joke. Fujiko loved being sarcastic, so she joined in.

“The student council president says that whatever it is, she wants as much of it as possible. She says she hopes it will help her chest grow.”

“You’re a dead woman...” Lily’s expression grew even more ferocious. If a child saw it, it would traumatize them for life.

“Both of you, calm down. I’m afraid I’m going to have to put a stop to...” Junko tried to interrupt, but Lily jabbed at her with an extending arm.

Smack!

The fist hit Junko’s face and bounced off. It was a weak attack, a message to stay out of this.

But...

“Don’t try and stop me. You couldn’t beat me in the labyrinth, remember?”

Junko had staggered back and dropped to her knees, but those words lit a fire in her eyes.

“...Take that back, please. I’m not who I once was. I will join in this battle over side dishes!”

Junko drew the blade at her waist. It was her family’s treasure, the Sohaya no Tsurugi. A blade blessed with incredible powers by the god Suhara. Now that Suhara was dead, its powers had weakened, but it was still an extremely powerful sword. It still had the power to rapidly boost its wielder’s mana.

A rainbow light ran along the blade, covering Junko’s body with mana. The intense pressure radiating from her was enough for Lily to get serious.

“I like it! That face! That power! I’m excited for this now! Both of you, come and get me!”

Wind blew across the concrete hill. The three pretty girls were the only ones standing among the unconscious students. Each of them had their own style of elegance and strength, and each of them was tensed and ready for battle.

It was like a beautiful sight, that is, if you forgot the fact that none of them knew why they were fighting.

“Eeyaaaah!”

It was Lily who made the first move. She wasn’t lying when she said she intended to fight them both. Her flurry of punches reached out towards both Fujiko and Junko.

“Dodge!” Fujiko ordered Cerberus, who reacted with bestial speed. The huge, three-headed beast showed no fear in the face of the simultaneous attacks, dodging them perfectly with a series of leaps to the left and right.

Junko created a clone to dodge the attacks. When Lily’s punches hit, it disappeared, and Junko was already gone.

“Tch!” Lily looked around for Junko.

“Standard combat theory says she’d jump up... which means she’s below?!”

Only someone of Lily’s strength would’ve been able to detect the flow of mana at the last second and dodge. She leapt up slightly to dodge the attack at her feet.

“You dodged it?!” Junko had used her mana to create a false concrete floor to hide under while she charged at Lily, and now that her attack had failed, she was crouched down and wide open.

“Hah!” Lily tried to punch downwards, but before she could, Fujiko took action.

“You’re not fighting just one person!” Fujiko’s whip struck at Lily. She’d waited for lily to jump off the ground, but since Lily could fly, it didn’t give her the advantage she’d expected. Lily stopped in mid-air and slashed apart the whip with a mana-coated strike.

“‘Oh no, I failed...!’ Is what I’m NOT going to say! I’m not the type who fights with brute strength!” Fujiko’s plan had been for Lily to slash at the whip all along. When she did, she simply let it go. The whip wrapped itself around Lily like it had a will of its own.

“What? It was a trap?” Lily gasped in surprise. The whip squeezed her torso, and she moaned in pain.

“Hahahaha! I never thought I could beat you in a straight-up fight!” Fujiko laughed as if she’d already won.

“You coward! Don’t fight with your tools! Fight me bare-handed!” Lily grunted. She could still reach out her arms, but since she couldn’t use her shoulders, she couldn’t move them fast enough to turn them into punches. Fujiko’s Cerberus hopped around to dodge them.

“Fighting bare-handed is what barbarians do!” she laughed. “Also, when most girls get caught like that, their breasts get wrapped up and squeezed by the whip, and gives anybody seeing it a nice show. But with your skinny body, that doesn’t happen. Hahaha!”

“Ugaaah! I’ll get you for this!” Lily screamed, while Fujiko just laughed.

But then, the laugh froze on her lips.

“Shameless!”

The whip was sliced apart with a shout. Lily was free. But before Fujiko could even react, there was someone standing on top of one of Cerberus’s heads. It was Junko, with her arms crossed and looking down at Fujiko.

“I’ve been meaning to have a talk with you about that!”

“Yeah, and I’ve been getting pretty annoyed at your goody-goody act!”

Fujiko tried to go on the attack, but Cerberus staggered and Junko was forced to leap away.

“It doesn’t matter, I’m still taking you both down!” Lily started punching randomly in Fujiko and Junko’s direction.

“Stop messing around!” Fujiko howled as Cerberus started running.

“If you want a brawl, then you’ve got one!” Junko created another clone, so she was facing off against Lily and Fujiko at the same time.

Lily turned towards her, ready for a fight, and Fujiko spurred Cerberus onwards to join in the brawl. The battle got fiercer, things got even more confused, and chaos manifested on the roof.

Meanwhile, there were two people watching as the battle unfolded: Keena and Keina.

Keena was watching from the shadows, and she’d gotten a strange idea in her head.

“Oh no! This is all because of my rice pudding! When they talked about side dishes for dinner, this is what they meant! What do I do? My wonderful rice pudding is making my friends fight! It’s such a horrible thing that the world can never be at peace!”

Keena was talking like she was the heroine of a tragedy. She’d gotten down on her knees to pray, but the rice pudding cup was still firmly in her hands.

“I-I have no idea why this happened!” Keina, who’d been dragged up to the roof by Junko and then abandoned, was just standing there in shock. But unluckily for her, she found herself caught up in the battle.

“Kyah!”

Fragments of concrete rained down upon her. She put up her hands to defend herself, but a small rock struck her forehead.

“Oww!” She put her hand up to her head. A small amount of blood stuck to her fingers.

“Blood! Noooo! It hurts! Nooo!” When she saw the blood, Keina started to scream. But none of the three who were fighting noticed.

One of Cerberus’s fireballs was knocked off course by a punch from Lily, and part of it flew towards Keina.

“Watch out!”

Her body was suddenly knocked to the side. Keena, still invisible, had tackled her and protected her from the spray of flames.

“Kyaaah!” Keina fell to the ground, shocked. It was only then that the three realized something was wrong.

“Hmm?”

“What?”

“What happened?” When they turned towards Keina, they saw Keena, too.

“Stop!” Keena spread out her arms in the pose of a young girl trying to stop a war.

“Stop fighting! Please! Please, I’m begging you!’ Keena said, weeping. But since the three of them were all women, a young girl’s tears didn’t mean that much to them.

“B-But I’m fighting to right a wrong,” Junko mumbled.

“But Dorry got hurt!” Keena yelled. Junko fell silent, but Fujiko was unimpressed.

“Its her fault this whole thing happened!” Fujiko said.

“I’m not just going to ignore it when someone flattens me with a door,” Lily said. Since she’d been an innocent bystander to begin with, she wasn’t going to forget this easily.

“Stop it! I know why you’re fighting! So...” Keena dropped to her knees and put the cup of rice pudding on the ground in front of her.

“Let’s all share it! That should fix everything!”

The three of them stared at the cup in confusion.

“...What are you talking about?”

“And...”

“What is that?”

“What? This is rice pudding! The legendary rice pudding made from Uonuma Koshihikari rice! It’s strained until it’s silky smooth, and goes perfectly with milk! Its heavenly taste is said to make anyone who eats it feel like they’re floating on a cloud! The legendary Rosanjin spoke of it when he said, ‘My day begins with rice pudding, and my day ends with rice pudding!’ It was ranked #1 in a newspaper survey of foods people want for their last meal!” Keena explained in an awe-struck voice, but the others did nothing but glance at one another.

“Rice... pudding?”

“I’ve never tried it.”

“It’s basically milk porridge. If you don’t flavor it, it tastes like milk and rice, and if you try to make it sweet, it’s not that different from regular pudding,” Fujiko said flatly.

Lily looked at Fujiko like this was the dumbest thing she’d ever heard.

“Is that what’s behind this? Did you blast off the door to the roof to get that stuff?”

“Of course not! It’s another one of that girl’s stupid misunderstandings!”

“I’m sure it is, but... Ugh. This whole thing is starting to feel so stupid.” Junko sighed and put her blade back in its scabbard.

“I guess we can do this another time.” Lily’s shoulders slumped.

“Yes, I agree. You can go back home, Cerberus.” Fujiko sent Cerberus back to his den, and put on her uniform.

“I’m so glad you all understand! Now let’s all eat it, together!” Keena started to cut the rice pudding into five equal pieces, but the three of them just walked past her.

“See you later.”

“You can have it all to yourself.”

“If I really want some, I can just use the student council budget to buy it.”

Keena couldn’t believe what she’d heard.

“Huh? Then I can have it all to myself? Oh, but you want some, right Dorry?”

Keena looked towards Keina, who’d been crying a moment ago. She was looking at the rice pudding with gleaming eyes. Keina could be almost idiotically pure-hearted at times, and she’d evidently believed everything Keena had said.

“Y-You’re willing to give me something so wonderful? You’re really sure?”

“Yup! Let’s eat it together!”

Keena and Keina nodded to one another.

And then someone else appeared on the roof.

“Huh? I heard there was a fuss, so I came up here. Is everything alright?”

Akuto poked his head out from the broken doorway. Junko, Fujiko, and Lily were just about to leave, and all of them were shocked.

“Oh.”

“Akuto!”

“What are you doing here?”

Lily had nothing to do with it, but Fujiko and Junko remembered the original reason for their quarrel.

“H-Hey! I heard you’re worried about your future! Why didn’t you come talk to me?”

“Akuto! You’ve decided on a happy future with me, haven’t you?”

Junko and Fujiko rushed towards him.

Akuto was confused, but apologized.

“Huh? If I gave you the wrong idea, I’m sorry. I wanted to think about something on my own. That was all.”

“Think about something? I heard it was something important, that had to do with your future.”

“No... I mean... I feel really bad for the owner of that café. His café might go out of business and he might lose his job because of me. So I thought I should send him some money.”

“But you don’t have a lot of cash yourself, do you? That would be pretty expensive...”

“That’s right. So I was thinking of asking the principal for a loan that I would pay back when I graduate. I just wouldn’t feel right if I didn’t. So I was trying to think about it and come up with a plan to repay the debt.”

“No! I can’t let you get a job, Akuto!” Fujiko said as she clung to him. “If it’s that important to you, I’ll pay it! Whether it’s a hundred million, or two hundred million!”

Junko interrupted her loudly, as if she didn’t want to lose her chance.

“I-If that’s what this is about, then I’m at fault too. My family will pay the money...”

But Akuto shook his head.

“No, I thought about it, and we’re students, so we’d be relying on our parents’ money. But this time, I don’t want to use any money that’s coming from somebody’s family. I think part of what happened last time was because I tried to rely on the Hattori clan, for one thing.”

“Th-Then...”

“Unless I make the money myself, or somehow get lucky and find it, there’s going to be some political meaning behind it, right? So I have to do this myself,” Akuto said, but neither Fujiko nor Junko were willing to give in.

“If you want money, I can go collect some in secret!”

“I don’t think anybody will want money that you got illegally, Fujiko.”

“What? It’s better than having your parents pay!”

“Fine, but if you’re paying, that means you’re admitting you’re at fault for what happened at the café, right?”

“Of course not! That was Keina Doronz’s fault! This whole fight started because of her ridiculous attitu...”

“That’s right! I heard you were being mean to Doronz, so I came to stop you...”

The two of them went back to being ready to fight at any moment.

Akuto frowned. He looked at Lily, the most powerful person here, for help, but she just shook her head like she didn’t want to be bothered with it, and then walked off.

Junko and Fujiko started screaming at each other, only to be interrupted by Keena, who was naked except for a school uniform jacket.

“No fighting! If we all eat the rice pudding together, it will solve everything! We’ll all be friends!” Keena said.

Fujiko and Junko tried to ignore her, but then they noticed that Keina was eating the rice pudding she’d been given.

“Oh, this is delicious! I didn’t realize there was a way to make rice taste as good as bread! This is wonderful! We can be friends!” Keina said. She seemed to have forgotten all about the sex she was supposed to have with Akuto.

Come to think of it, the jacket Keena was wearing belonged to Keina. That could only mean they were friendly enough now for her to lend it.

“See, we’re friends! It’s delicious,” Keena said, “so try some!”

She stuck a cup and spoon in Junko and Fujiko’s faces, and they each took a bite. They both frowned.

“I hate to say it, but... it’s not great.”

“No. It tastes awful.”

“Huh? It’s delicious! Right? Right?” Keena offered the last bit in the cup to Akuto.

He thought for a moment before eating it, and then shook his head.

“I’m sorry, but it tastes very... mysterious. Huh?” Akuto saw letters at the bottom of the cup. “You’re a winner?”

That’s what it said on the bottom of the cup.

“Oh! Yay! I won!” Keena shouted with glee.

“One of the reasons this rice pudding is so popular is that sometimes you can win a prize. It’s really hard to win, but you get a ton of money.”

“Money?”

“Yup. It keeps building up if nobody wins, so I think right now it’s about 50 million,” Keena said, as if that wasn’t an incredibly huge number.

As everyone stood there in shock, Keena handed the cup to Akuto.

“You said it was okay if it was money you found because you were lucky, right? Congratulations. You were the last one to eat it, so it’s yours, Ackie.”

Akuto just stood there in shock. But Keena was perfectly calm.

“See? Rice pudding made everything peaceful, right? So let’s all eat rice pudding!”

○

Later, the other students heard about what had happened, and rice pudding became extremely popular.

But nobody was able to eat rice pudding every day, and so Keena and Keina became popular for being the only students in the Academy who could do it. Huge amounts of rice pudding were brought into the school for them to eat, but nobody won, and the fad quickly faded.

“It’s supposed to be legendary because it’s impossible to find, but...”

Akuto was able to send a letter, along with the winning cup, to the owner of Café Bakhtin. This probably wasn’t a nice thing to say after he’d been so blessed by it, but...

“...It’s impossible to find because nobody wants to eat it, and the prize money only built up so much because nobody bought a winning cup, right?”