Chapter 5: Kirio Drugs’ Day Off

Chapter 5:
Kirio Drugs’ Day Off

 

AROUND CLOSING TIME, I said, “How about we all go somewhere on our day off tomorrow?” Vivi and Ejil were working today, so it was a perfect time to pitch the idea.

“That sounds lovely,” Mina told me, smiling. “Yes, let’s go!”

Vivi raised her hand cautiously. “C-can I come?”

“Of course. I said we’d all go.”

“M-may I join you as well?!” Ejil said.

“Yes. I said all.”

“Doctor!” The demon king jumped at me, delighted.

I grabbed his face to keep him from getting closer. “So, where do you guys want to go? We should probably make it a one-day trip, since the drugstore will be open the day after.”

Vivi raised her hand. “Reiji! Me! Me!”

“You have the floor, part-timer.”

“Let’s go have a picnic at the lake!”

Eh, we’d done that before. The lake was where we first met Vivi.

“Doctor, I… I’ll go anywhere you wish to go!” Ejil interjected.

He doesn’t have a particular spot in mind. Meh, I guess if Noela’s there, he’ll be happy.

Hearing our conversation, the werewolf girl entered the drugstore holding an eraser. “Forest survival trip!” she demanded.

She’s rarin’ to go. Still, an eraser wasn’t really survival gear. “Absolutely not. Why would we subject ourselves to that? No hard work.”

“Groo…” The werewolf girl looked displeased.

“How about a hike, Mr. Reiji?” Mina suggested. “We wouldn’t need to climb a mountain—we could hike up a hill near town. That shouldn’t be too tiring if Griffy carries our bags.”

“Why do you insist on aggravating the good doctor, woman?!” As usual, Ejil was especially rude to Mina.

A hike, huh? “I like that plan,” I told her. “Let’s do it.”

Ejil flipped like a damn pancake. “Absolutely! Let’s go hiking!”

Mina clapped her hands happily as we settled on her idea. “Afterward, we can have a picnic as we enjoy the view!”

Sounds like a delightful little outdoor adventure.

Noela seemed concerned, though. “Lot of bugs?”

Right—I forgot. She can’t handle creepy-crawlies.

“Yeah, there probably will be a decent number of bugs,” I admitted.

“Garoo! Hate.”

For Noela to be comfortable spending time outdoors, we’d need a special product. I could think of some items in the drugstore that might do the trick, but nothing that would also allow her to get off scot-free.

“No worries, Noela. I’ll make something that’ll get rid of bugs on this hike,” I assured her.

“Garoo! Master wonderful! All hail Master!” She hugged my waist, and I stroked her little head.

Ejil stared at me, fuming with jealousy, then retrieved a map from behind the counter and opened it. “If we plan to return on the same day, Doctor, I’d say Mt. Bizef looks like a good hiking route.”

According to Ejil, Mt. Bizef was about four hundred meters tall—pretty small for a mountain. I had to hand it to our demon king; naturally, he was familiar with the area.

“There are no taller peaks near Kalta,” he concluded. “I imagine that the view from the top is quite nice.”

I swear, Ejil’s way better suited to being someone’s right-hand man than to being demon king.

“W-will I be all right?” Vivi asked nervously.

“You shouldn’t have trouble,” Ejil assured her. “Mt. Bizef is known for its springs.”

“Wonderful!”

With no better options for our trip on the table, we settled on Mt. Bizef. The part-time team, Vivi and Ejil, headed home. Meanwhile, Mina and Noela prepared food for the hike.

Time to make a new product for tomorrow. I headed to the lab.

“I’ll use repellent as a base.” Grabbing a bottle of repellent from our backstock, I mixed in various ingredients. “There. Done.”

 

Bye-Bye Bug Queen: Insect repellent so strong, bugs won’t come anywhere near.

 

Noela should be able to enjoy herself bug-free with this.

The werewolf girl poked her head in. “Made food, Master.”

“Hey, fluffball. No need to worry about bugs anymore.”

“Groo?”

To test the repellent, I grabbed some bug gel—the exact same product I’d used to lure food for Griffy—and headed outside.

“What that, Master?”

“A product to keep bugs away.”

“Arroo! For Noela?”

“Yup, for you.” I slathered some gel on a rock and, just like that, lured over tons of bugs.

“Garoo!” Noela quickly hid in the shadows.

“Now we take the lid off.”

A unique smell wafted from the bottle of Bye-Bye Bug Queen; when insects drew near it, they immediately fled.

“Wards off bugs, Master!” Noela seemed fascinated. I handed her the bottle, and she gave it a sniff. “Weird smell, but no problem.”

“Normal repellent works on you as well as monsters and insects. I designed this one specifically for bugs, so you and Griffy should be fine with it. Now you can enjoy the hike.”

Noela’s tail wagged. “Thank you, Master! Noela let you touch tail!”

Since she’d given me permission, I made the most of her tail’s soft fur.

 

***

 

As I slept, I heard a quiet voice in my ear. “Good morning, Doctor.”

“Gah! Wh-who is that?!”

“It’s me, Doctor. Your number-one disciple!”

I don’t recall ever making you my disciple!

“What time is it?” Still in bed, I looked outside to see the sun just peeking over the horizon. “What’re you doing in here, Ejil?”

“What a silly question! You said I could come on the day trip.”

“You mean, join the hike?” I rubbed my eyes, yawning. “Sure, but do you realize what time it is?”

“Am I ill, Doctor?” Ejil asked suddenly.

“Er…what makes you ask? The fact that you’re acting stupid?”

“You’re certainly mean-spirited in the morning,” Ejil said. “I’m asking because, for some reason, I couldn’t sleep when I thought about today.”

I scratched my head, letting out another yawn. I would’ve been lying if I said I wasn’t excited too, but I wasn’t so eager that I couldn’t sleep.

He’s like an elementary schooler before a field trip. Oh, right…he’s never been on a field trip. The demon king hadn’t had the same experiences I’d had as a modern dude.

“Don’t worry, Ejil. You aren’t sick,” I assured him. “Of course you can’t sleep the night before this big trip. You’re the type who can’t even nod off when you think about the candy you’ll buy with your three hundred yen the next day.”

“Candy? Three hundred yen?” Obviously, no one from this world would’ve understood my super-specific example.

I was now wide awake, thanks to Ejil. When I headed to the kitchen to grab a glass of water, I was surprised to hear noise coming from within.

“Ah, Mr. Reiji! Ejil! Good morning.” Mina was already packing for today’s hike.

“It’s way too early, Mina.”

She just giggled teasingly. “I couldn’t sleep.”

Since Kalta didn’t have schools, this hike was Mina’s first “field trip” too. Which obviously means the same thing goes for the werewolf and lake spirit.

“Tea set… Plates…” Mina stuffed tableware into a huge bag.

I know Griffy will carry all this, but there’s so much.

“Ejil, do you think it’ll be hard to boil water on Mt. Bizef?” Mina inquired.

“Probably not, but will the equipment fit in your bag?”

“Hmm… Let’s pass on boiling water for this trip. It’ll get cold, but I’ll bring some tea in a flask.”

Man… Drinking hot tea with a great view would be pretty ritzy. Hmm.

Ejil cleared his throat. “Allow me to assist you, woman.”

“Thank you so much. Would you mind—”

The demon king followed Mina’s instructions as he helped her. Despite being a king, he was actually quite a handyman—super useful no matter what we were doing.

We still had tons of time before we’d leave, so I decided to try making a new product I’d just thought of. On my way to the lab, I heard voices.

“What am I going to do, Noela? I couldn’t sleep!”

“Quiet, Vivi! Noela no sleep either.”

Vivi had slept in Noela’s room last night. Apparently, neither girl was able to rest. Even Griffy was making noise outside, perhaps having noticed that today was no normal day off. Jeez, the sun’s not even up, and we’re all awake already.

“Maybe we should leave a little early,” I mumbled.

Closing the lab door, I gathered materials for the hike, grabbing the Bye-Bye Bug Queen I’d made yesterday and some Translator DX so we could communicate with Griffy. I almost got a bottle of repellent but then realized we wouldn’t need it with the demon king present.

I also packed some of the usual potions and stomach meds, just in case. Then I got to work, quickly creating a brand-new product.

“With this, we should be able to really enjoy our food,” I said. I couldn’t wait to see everyone’s surprised faces.

After I finished, I led Griffy out from its stable. The griffin flapped its wings excitedly. “Kyuu! Kyuu!”

I took a swig of Translator DX to hear what Griffy was saying. “Everyone’s here! Where’re you going? Will Griff get to go too?!”

“No need to fret. Actually, we need your help with something only you can do.”

“Yay! Griff loves being useful!”

Aww. How cute. The corners of my eyes crinkled like an affectionate old geezer’s as I ruffled Griffy’s chest plumage. Hey, being a griffin and all, couldn’t Griffy fly us to the foot of Mt. Bizef?

“Could five people fit on your back, Griffy?”

“Five?” Griffy repeated. “Hmm…yes, as long as they aren’t too big!”

The drugstore staff should fit fine, then. Now we can cut down our travel time.

I noticed Noela staring at us from the window. “Only fluff Noela, Master!”

Griffy hesitated, then hurried away from me, flustered. “You mustn’t pet Griff’s feathers like that, Master! After all, you have Instructor Fluffball!”

Griffy’s calling her “Instructor” again.

Mina stepped out of the house carrying a huge backpack. Vivi, Noela, and Ejil followed her.

“Oh, my!” Mina exclaimed. “Everyone’s here.”

“Perfect. How about we get going, then?” I suggested. We could eat the breakfast sandwiches Mina had made en route.

I hopped on Griffy’s back, and Noela got on in front of me. Ejil, Vivi, and Mina climbed up behind us.

“We’re good to go, Griffy!” I cried. “Lift off!”

“You bet!”

Griffy broke into a gallop, flapping its wings. Ker-thump! Ker-thump! Then, the griffin took off. Ejil was totally used to flying, but the rest of us couldn’t help shrieking excitedly.

“How long will it take to reach the foot of Mt. Bizef, Ejil?” I asked.

“About an hour, normally. Like this, though? Ten minutes, give or take.”

“Hey! Hey, Reiji! Let’s ride Li’l Kyuu all the way to the peak!” Vivi cried.

I’d just been considering that, but Mina interrupted. “Perish the thought! Hiking is fun because you climb with your own two feet!”

“Right,” I agreed.

Shortly after that, we arrived at Mt. Bizef. The weather was clear; it was a perfect hiking day. We found a large tree with an enormous shadow, and once Mina spread a blanket on the ground, we ate our breakfast sandwiches right there in the shade. The lettuce, cheese, and crunchy bacon were delicious.

Noela’s fluffy tail wagged back and forth; she seemed happy as a clam. She’s so obvious.

“Did you bring any tea, Mina?” I asked.

“Of course. Just a moment.”

“Actually, could you give me the whole pot?”

Mina looked perplexed, but she did as I asked. Since we’d flown from the drugstore to Mt. Bizef, the tea was already pretty cold. I poured it into a bottle I pulled from my bag.

“What’re you doing, Doctor?” Ejil asked.

“Warming the tea up, of course.”

I put the sealed bottle of tea inside a watertight leather pouch, then added my new product and some water. Vapor rose from the drawstring pouch’s opening with a whooshing noise.

“Master, white,” Noela pointed out.

“Yup. That’s steam.”

Looking at me and the leather pouch, Vivi apparently realized what the new product was. “Hold on, Reiji!”

“Yeah?”

“You’re smoking the tea, aren’t you?!”

“Wrong.” She totally didn’t understand.—

 

Hot-Hotter-Hottest: Instant heating agent. Mix with water to produce high-temperature steam capable of warming objects.

 

When the steam in the leather pouch really started to build, I pulled out the toasty-warm tea bottle with potholders.

“A-amazing!” cried Vivi. “It’s nice and hot!”

“With this new product, we won’t need to eat cold food when we’re out of town,” I explained.

Noela touched the leather pouch and then jerked her hand back from the heat. “Groo?!”

Mina handed out cups and poured in the tea. Between that and the sandwiches she’d made, we had a surprisingly nice breakfast. Once we finished our refreshments, it was time to head out hiking.

Noela switched to her wolf form; she said it was easier to climb mountain paths as a wolf. I guess two legs aren’t the best for mountain climbing. She sniffed around to confirm that there were no beasts or monsters nearby. Since we were using the Bye-Bye Bug Queen, we didn’t spot a single insect either. The rest of us took some Translator DX so we could understand what she was saying.

“This way!” Noela called. “No problem! Come!”

“Your fur’s so smooth, Instructor,” cried Griffy. “Griff’s jealous!”

“Noela bathe every day, of course!” Noela snorted.

Ejil seemed unusually moved by her wolf form. “Noela looks positively divine. She’s truly a mountain goddess!”

“Oh, right,” I said. “This is your first time seeing her like this.”

Noela’s tail wagged. Thunderstruck, Ejil began to tremble.

“What’s up?”

“How could she wag her tail in front of me? How salacious!”

You’re the only one who feels that way.

No longer able to hold back, Ejil leapt at the wolf. “Noela!”

“Garroo!” Turning to face him, she caught his head in her mouth.

“Agh… Oooooh!” Rather than screaming in pain, Ejil moaned as if he were getting a wonderful massage.

“Master, Ejil beyond saving. Noela eat head,” Noela told me.

“Please don’t.”

“Ejil’s so disgusting!” Griffy kicked the demon king’s body as it dangled from Noela’s teeth.

“Come on, stop it! No ganging up on Ejil!”

He was the demon king and all, but when it came to Kirio Drugs’ employees, Ejil was as talented and good at his job as Mina. I couldn’t have him die on me.

Noela spat Ejil out, and his grinning body flopped to the ground.

“Should we leave him be?” asked Vivi. “I mean, it looks like he’s still enjoying himself.”

“Sounds good,” Mina smiled.

Meh. It’s not like Ejil will be in real danger here. He is the demon king.

At any rate, I had stuff I wanted to do on this hike, so I wasn’t going to waste time over Ejil.

As we hiked along the trail, I made sure to harvest as many unfamiliar herbs, nuts, and flowers as I could. Fwip. Fwip.

Vivi seemed puzzled. “What’re you doing, Reiji? Writing a guidebook on plants or something?”

“Nah. I can use these to make new products.”

“I’ll help you pick them, then!”

“Much obliged. Grab the same stuff I’m grabbing, okay?”

“Uh-huh! No problem!”

Mt. Bizef was only a ten-minute ride from Kalta on Griffy’s back, but with the stuff I was foraging, I’d be able to make way more products. If I can grow any of these in our meadow, I totally will.

“Reiji! Reiji! Look! I got a bunch!” Vivi cried happily, showing me what she’d collected.

Man, she’s quick!

I looked inside Vivi’s leather bag and saw that she’d picked tons of colorful mushrooms—the kind that might increase someone’s size for a while. You know what I mean.

 

Amyuudake Mushroom: Fungus that produces an ominous first impression. Causes diarrhea, vomiting, and visual/auditory hallucinations.

 

“Vivi, dear, why did you grab these?” I asked with a grandfatherly expression. It wouldn’t be right to get mad immediately.

“They’re pretty! This way, your new products will be nice and colorful!”

“So I can make colorful potions?! Thanks a lot for that!” I hurled the bag away, wide-eyed.

“Aw! What’s the big idea?!”

“That’s my line, you airhead!” I gave her empty head a light smack. “Didn’t I tell you to pick what I was picking?”

“Yeowch! I just thought I could be more useful by—”

“I’m docking your salary.”

“I’m sorry!” It had only taken a second to put an end to Vivi’s excuses.

My personal rule was not to create any products meant to hurt people. If anything I made harmed the body, it’d be a temporary side effect at most. I had created products that were harmful if used incorrectly, but still, you get my point.

“Tee hee!” Mina giggled warmly as she watched my back-and-forth with Vivi.

After that, Mina wound up filling in for Vivi, helping me harvest quite a few new plants.

“You’re a lifesaver, Mina.”

“It’s no problem. This is a lot of fun! I never get to come when you gather new herbs.”

That’s a good point. Since Mina was great at housework and managing the drugstore, she always focused on those chores. I sometimes asked her to help in the garden, but having her come harvest new herbs and stuff always felt like a bit much. Usually, Noela was the best person to bring, since she had her own built-in enemy radar.

After hiking for a while, we squeezed in a break.

Vivi was starting to fall apart. “Reiji, I can’t walk any further!”

I helped her onto Griffy’s back. “You lack stamina, Miss Lake Spirit.”

“I’m not a spirit, I’m a fairy! Wait—no, I am a spirit!” She’d totally taken the bait.

About two hours after we’d started climbing, we finally reached the peak. None of us were avid hikers, so we were exhausted. Upon our arrival, Mina and Vivi plopped down on some boulders nearby.

Noela returned to her human form. “Garoo! Amazing view!” She tugged on my shirt, pointing.

Past her finger was the wide-open land—fields seemingly the size of a fingertip, roads like thin threads, people the size of ants traveling along them.

“Whoa!” I gasped. “Spectacular.”

Vivi and Mina reacted similarly. The cold breeze felt fantastic on our warm, tired cheeks. I looked down, seeing the path we’d traveled to reach this peak, and we silently drank in the grandeur until Noela’s stomach rumbled.

That sounded more like a laser gun, to be honest.

“Hungry, Master!”

“Should we get ready for lunch, then?”

We opened a picnic blanket in a spot that looked cozy, and Mina started pulling stuff out of her huge backpack.

“Firewood, a frying pan, eggs, bacon…” She paused. “Erm, do you think a life stone will make a big enough fire?”

“I figured that might be an issue, so I brought some hell flame.” I rummaged through my bag. Hell flame was perfect for outdoor cooking.

“Then we won’t have trouble keeping a big fire going!” Mina said, relieved. She was absolutely right, but her glowing description sounded like a TV sales pitch.

Meanwhile, Vivi was on the verge of tears. “Reiji, the water’s filthy!”

“Didn’t you bring some from upstream? That water was good, right?”

We’d found a spring on our way up the mountain, so we’d taken a break there, and Vivi had refilled our water bottles. At least, that was what she should’ve done.

“Well, um…something happened. Yeah.” The lake spirit in charge of our water looked away.

She forgot to refill the bottles, didn’t she?

Even Mina was flustered about running out of water. “We’ve only got a little tea left! What should we do?”

“I brought some water purifier just in case. Let’s use that,” I replied.

Noela reacted to the words “water purifier” right away. “Tasty! Smooth!”

I added some purifier to the water from the peak. “We should be able to drink this now, even if it’s a little dirty.”

“Thanks, Reiji.”

We’d made Mina a “stove” immediately, and she began cooking, boiling pasta in a pot she’d brought while simmering bacon in some kind of sauce. She added egg yolk, then grated some cheese and sprinkled it in. Noela impatiently thumped her tail on the ground.

“It’s all ready!” Mina exclaimed. “Simple mountaintop carbonara!”

She called the meal “simple,” but it was the same quality she would’ve made at home. No wonder she brought so much stuff. As I smirked, Noela grabbed her fork and dug in; I did the same just afterward.

“Eating outside makes it twice as tasty as usual,” I told Mina.

“I’m glad!”

“Mina! Seconds!”

“There are no second helpings today, Noela.”

“Groo?!”

Mina had brought bread too; we ate it alongside the pasta, pulling it apart and dipping it in the leftover sauce. We quickly ran out of food, and Mina used the hot-hotter-hottest to reheat some tea. She’d even brought cookies to go along with it.

“This is literally perfect,” I said.

“Tee hee! I just thought it’d all go together well.”

Noela quietly scarfed down her cookies like a squirrel. She really didn’t care how she came off.

“I’ve never had this much fun in my entire life,” Mina told me.

“Jeez. That’s heavy,” I replied sympathetically.

“Reiji!” Vivi interjected. “Feel bad for me!”

Why would you want me to feel bad for you?!

We enjoyed chitchatting, then traveled back down the mountain before it got too dark.

“We should do this again sometime, Mr. Reiji,” Mina suggested.

“Definitely.”

“Mina make seconds next time,” Noela demanded.

Mina giggled. “All right, all right!”

“Reiji, next time, I’ll harvest even more mushrooms!”

“Don’t worry about it, Vivi. You don’t need to do anything.”

“Don’t say that! Don’t write me off!”

And so our fun day trip came to an end.