Chapter 18: Nonstop Libido

Chapter 18:
Nonstop Libido

 

ZERAL’S GIRLFRIEND Feris was requesting a treatment that, needless to say, gave me pause.

The rather hotheaded girl had quietly made her way into the drugstore and told me, “I want to have Zeral’s child.”

Yup.

Can’t they just take a day off to go at it like the dummies they are? I initially thought. However, things weren’t as simple as they seemed.

“Recently, Zeral hasn’t really…well…” Feris looked uncomfortable. “He isn’t interested in me.”

So, Zeral’s the problem? Maybe he has a girl on the side?

Feris was reportedly so very concerned that she hadn’t been sleeping, which sounded like the same vicious cycle they’d been in before. Images of Feris running around with a knife raced through my mind.

So, Feris wanted a prescription that would get Zeral in the mood—something like a love potion. I told her to give me time to think about whether I could fulfill her request, and sent her home.

Soon, the man of the hour waltzed nonchalantly into the store. I hadn’t heard anything from Zeral about another woman, so I interrogated him. “Uh, how’re things going with Feris? Getting along? Any fighting?”

“Huh? Er, no fighting. Why?”

Hrm. I wondered whether I should tell Zeral that Feris had come by asking me for a prescription. That’d technically be a breach of privacy, right? I should probably keep it to myself.

“It’s nothing. You thinking about marriage?”

“Marriage…? Pretty much. Feris is the daughter of a wealthy merchant family from the next town over, and our parents are fine with the idea.”

At first, I’d thought Feris was after a shotgun wedding, but that didn’t seem to be the case. She and Zeral were just genuinely celibate. Since they were practically engaged, I could see why she’d find that concerning. I questioned Zeral seriously, but it didn’t seem like he was cheating.

“Is something going on, Reiji?”

“No. It’s just… I think you should, you know, take things as they come. If you and Feris love each other, and you’re both thinking about the future…I think it’s okay to move forward, you know? Besides, you’re rich.”

“Er…what’re you talking about?”

“Nothing. Nothing at all.”

“Huh?” Zeral tilted his head, confused.

I could imagine someone being unable to, uh…get it up…if they were tired or just not in the mood. Maybe that was the issue?

As I pondered this, our conversation turned casual, and Zeral eventually went home.

I decided to fulfill Feris’s request and make an aphrodisiac. I didn’t want Feris to start swinging a knife around in public again, after all.

Noela and I headed into the usual forest together and gathered numerous herbs, including the roots of a plant called “muku.” All that was left was to pick up some fruit from the marketplace to make the treatment more palatable.

“Welcome home, Mr. Reiji!” Mina had held down the fort in our absence. She’d apparently overhead some of my conversation with Feris earlier. “What sort of medicine will you be making today?”

How should I explain this? It’s kind of awkward telling a young woman. “Er…medicine that energizes you, I guess.”

“Energizes? How is it different from your energy potions?”

“Um…let’s just say it’s a little more targeted.”

“Tasty-tasty? Energy tasty?” Noela seemed extra interested.

“Yeah, Noela, I’m gonna try my best to make sure it comes out tasty.”

Managing to avoid the awkward details, I headed into the laboratory. As usual, I followed the directions my skill outlined, and I had no problem quickly whipping up the medication.

 

Emotional Drive: Aphrodisiac. Strengthens emotions.

 

Er, is this really the right treatment? Especially considering its initials…

My skill called the new product an aphrodisiac, so I must’ve succeeded. Still, its description worried me a bit. I could test it, but without a partner, it’d be kind of depressing…

Okay, extremely depressing.

Since Zeral was swinging by tomorrow, I’d just give it to him and ask for the details later.

“All right,” I muttered to myself. “Tomorrow night should work out just fine for them, then.”

After using the washroom, I headed back to the laboratory, only to find that the treatment I’d just made was missing.

“Huh? It’s not here!” I searched the lab hastily. “Where is it? Where’d the aphrodisiac go?”

This is weird. I know for a fact that I left it right here…

I heard Mina’s voice from the other room. “I might be a bit worn out from all the housework, Noela. My body just feels so heavy recently, no matter what I do.”

“Master’s new medicine. Energy flavor!”

My jaw dropped. No, wait! Mina can’t drink that!

I rushed into the living room. Just as I feared, Noela had given Mina the medicine I’d crafted.

“Mina, don’t!”

It was already too late; Mina gulped it down.

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” she cried. “Noela said it was an energy drink, so I couldn’t help myself.”

As she apologized, her cheeks flushed, and her eyes narrowed. She looked like she was about to topple over. Panicking, I caught her in my arms.

This treatment’s initials are “E.D.,” but that’s coincidental. It’s not like it’s just for men.

“Wh-what should I do, M-Mr. Reiji?” Mina’s eyes welled up as she gently rubbed her knees together. She turned bashfully away from me. “I’m…I’m feeling like a very, very lewd girl.”

Well, that’s direct! Come on, Mina. Saying something like that with that look on your face is super unfair.

I just wanted to pick her up like a princess, take her to the bedroom, and totally… Er, obviously that’s not going to happen. Wait—what about the antidote I gave the kodola the other day? It’s supposed to calm you down! I was pretty sure the drugstore had some in stock.

I set Mina on the sofa, only for her to wrap both arms around my neck and pull me close.

“Whoa!”

“Hee hee! Where do you think you’re going, Mr. Reiji?”

“The store, Mina.”

“Even though you did this to me?”

“I certainly didn’t. The medicine did.”

“Who cares?!” Mina kissed my cheek.

“Hey, c’mon, stop that! Don’t blame me if you come to your senses and die of embarrassment later.”

“I’m already dead!”

Gah! Now she plays the ghost card?

“You can totally ravish me if you’d like.” She sounded enthusiastic about the idea.

“You’ll regret saying that when you go back to normal.”

“I’ve been dead a while; I’ve spent years regretting all kinds of things. Who cares if I add one more to the list?”

“This is getting heavy.”

Noela watched Mina immobilize me, then aggressively nodded. “Mina full of energy. Energy very important.”

She grabbed the rest of the E.D. treatment and hurried out of the living room.

“Yo! W-wait, Noela! Noeeelaaa!”

Closing the door behind her, she exited into the drugstore.

“Noela this, Noela that, Noela, Noela,” snapped Mina. “You’re always so focused on Noela. I wish you’d look at me more often!”

C’mon, Mina. Don’t say that with such pleading eyes.

“If you don’t, I’ll haunt you! Hee hee!”

Talk about the cutest curse ever. I sighed. “I get it, I get it! I’ll do whatever you want later, okay?”

I once again tried to head for the store, only for Mina to take my arm and tag along, giggling. “Mr. Reiji! Mr. Reeeiiiiji!”

All I know is that I need her to drink the antidote, and fast.

As I entered the store, I saw Noela with Annabelle. The Red Cat Brigade’s captain held a bottle of the aphrodisiac.

“Energy tasty. Energy important,” Noela informed her.

“Ooh, thanks, little lady! Lately, I’ve been pretty exhausted.” Annabelle downed the bottle’s contents in one go. Gulp!

“Ah!” I cried. “You can’t—”

The captain dropped the empty bottle to the floor. Clunk!

Her intimidating expression changed, and her sharp gaze grew relaxed and come-hither. “What’s happenin’ to me, Pharmacist? I feel…weird.”

Suddenly, Red Cat Brigade members gathered outside the drugstore, looking in. “I knew it!” one exclaimed.

“B-Boss?” another asked. “What’s wrong?”

Annabelle looked up at me with an uncharacteristically confused expression. “Am I…really not attractive enough? I know I’m rough and tumble, but I…I’ll work on that, I swear!”

The members of her brigade looked positively smitten.

“Our foul-mouthed, tough-as-nails boss is showin’ her feminine side,” one breathed. “Gah! She’s so cute.”

Shouldn’t you guys be on patrol?

“Y’all need to get back to work, stat!” Annabelle ordered.

“You’re the one who gets potions every morning, right?” Mina demanded. “Just to catch a glimpse of Mr. Reiji?”

“N-nuh-uh.” Annabelle’s voice was quiet. “I’m just…free in the morning, is all. It’s a coincidence.”

Mina puffed her chest out as if bragging. “After this, Mr. Reiji and I are doing all kinds of smutty things together.”

“We are so not,” I interjected.

“Mind if I join and we make it a three-way?” Annabelle asked.

“Ah!” Mina exclaimed. “What a delightful idea!”

“I certainly mind!” I snapped. “Don’t get on board, Mina!”

The lecherous women to either side of me kept me pinned. I gazed at the drugstore shelf; I still had two antidotes left, thank goodness. If I can just get them to drink some…

“Noela! Grab the antidote off the shelf for me!”

“Understood. Leave to Noela, Master!”

She made her way to the shelf I pointed at, stretched her arm up as far as she could, and grabbed both bottles.

“Garrroo?”

But with a tinkle of broken glass, the antidotes slipped out of her hand and fell. The smashed bottles leaked their contents onto the floor.

I made eye contact with Noela, whose expression read as pure panic. “Noela.”

“Remember important thing. Must do. Bye!”

“You liar!”

Noela immediately fled the scene of the crime with wolflike speed.

“Gaaaaah! Noeeelaaa! Come back!”

She did not, in fact, come back. The drugstore interior went quiet.

“Now then,” I said. “I just recalled something I have to take care of, so I’ll take my leave!”

Mina and Annabelle squeezed my arms tightly.

“Mr. Reiji.”

“Pharmacist.”

I ended up making more antidote with both women clinging to me. Then, somehow, I got them to drink it.

Let the record show that I’m extremely exhausted.

 

***

 

The next day, Mina wriggled on the ceiling, covering her face with both hands. “Oh my gosh, what’ve I done?”

There was no point chiming in with an “I told you so,” since I doubted Mina would remember that.

“I’m so embarrassed, I could just die,” she cried. “I-I can’t believe I kissed you. Waaah…!”

Annabelle, on the other hand, failed to pick up her daily potion order, instead sending a familiar Red Cat Brigade member to grab it. According to him, she wouldn’t be showing her face around the drugstore for a while, so other members would handle the transaction from then on.

“I dunno what happened, but if anyone mentions what went down yesterday, she kicks their ass,” he said before leaving. “You should be careful too, Medicine God.”

Noela finally made her way home, apologizing for breaking the antidote bottles. I forgave her immediately.

Before long, a pathetic-sounding voice called out to me while I watched the store. “Reiji, buddy, listen to this!”

Zeral appeared. There he is. Damn lovebird.

“Before you start complaining, I have a prescription for you.” I handed him the bottle, warning him to be sure to drink the energizing medicine with Feris.

“Huh? Is it dangerous?”

I sighed. “Why would I give you something dangerous?”

He sniffed it. “If this is basically an energy potion, no need to wait till I’m with Feris.” Then he chugged the whole bottle. “Huh? My body feels all hot…!”

“Could you please listen to my directions?!” I force-fed him a bottled antidote immediately, then remade the medication and sent Zeral home with it.

Lucky for me, Feris never came back to follow up.

I’m just gonna assume the problem was solved.

Every time I saw the happy couple, I couldn’t help thinking that they needed to hurry up and just tie the goddamn knot.