Chapter 19: The Aqua Annihilator

Chapter 19:
The Aqua Annihilator

 

IT RAINED two days ago, it rained yesterday, and now it was raining today.

Seriously, what’s with all the storms lately?

I didn’t know whether Kalta had a rainy season. The weather was so awful, though, that I couldn’t help but wonder.

I didn’t have field chores or customers, so there was nothing to do. For a while, I felt like that wasn’t all bad; I didn’t mind relaxing and watching the rain fall from inside the drugstore. After seemingly endless days of that routine, however, let’s just say I got bored.

“Reiji, pal!”

I lifted my head and saw Doz from the Red Cat Brigade wiping water off his massive body with his hands. Behind him, Captain Annabelle leaned against a shelf.

Mina brought them both towels.

“Thanks, Mrs. Kirio,” said Doz.

“O-oh, gosh, I’m not…um…” Mina fled like a rabbit.

“She just freeloads off Reiji! She ain’t his wife.” Annabelle quickly kicked Doz.

That must’ve been fairly common; Doz didn’t budge. In fact, he actually grinned. “Boss, what’s wrong?”

“Shut up,” Annabelle snarled. She sat down, clearly in a bad mood.

“So, uh, what brings you guys here in this rain?” I asked.

Doz turned to me. “Listen to this, pal. It’s been nothing but rain lately, right? We bring umbrellas when we patrol, but our equipment gets soaked. And we ain’t got time to dry stuff out.”

Makes sense. Man, doing security work around here must be rough.

The Red Cat Brigade wore mostly leather armor, and if it constantly got soaked, it could get moldy. I understood why Doz was concerned.

“I wear iron armor, but I still gotta deal with rust and stuff,” Annabelle added. “I get Red Cat recruits to polish it every day.”

“They get in fistfights deciding who can work on the boss’s armor,” Doz agreed. “It’s less about equipment and more about chasin’ her warmth and scent.”

“Those perverts need to dial it back,” I groaned. Seriously. That’s a little much.

I understood why they were competitive about cleaning Annabelle’s armor, though. A beautiful woman in a traditionally male profession was bound to drive some guys wild. Annabelle seemed to realize that; she looked unsurprised.

“If you need armor maintained, you should hit up the tool shop,” I told them.

“Maintaining our armor ain’t the issue, pal,” Doz retorted. “I want you to stop this rain.”

Like hell!

“If you manage that…” Doz pulled a pair of familiar gauntlets from his bag. They were Annabelle’s; I’d seen them at Paula’s store. “I’ll let you handle these.”

That’s hardly a reward.

“St-stop it, you jackass! You’re gonna weird him out!” Annabelle grabbed the gauntlets, hiding them behind her back.

“I don’t get it,” Doz protested to Annabelle. “You have no problem makin’ us maintain your gear, but you don’t want Reiji to smell it?”

I wouldn’t deliberately smell her gauntlets in the first place!

“Of course not, you big, stupid jerk! It’s embarrassing.” Annabelle fell silent.

“Look, I can’t just stop rain,” I insisted. “You’re kind of asking for the impossible.”

Although I’d clearly declined, Doz reached into his bag again, pulling out a familiar bottle. “The boss drank this potion. I’ll include the bottle in your payment.”

“Er…no need.”

Doz looked shocked. “It ain’t been washed! You still don’t want it?! Things like this are pricey among us mercs!”

“Dial it back, pervert.” I’d prefer that you washed it, so I could recycle it!

Annabelle rose to her feet. “We’re goin’ home, Doz. Even for a pharmacist, the impossible’s impossible.”

“Guess you’re right. Sorry about that, pal.” Disappointed, Doz grabbed the soaked umbrella he’d leaned against the wall.

His umbrella…?

“Ah! Hold on a sec!” I exclaimed. “I have an idea!”

Doz turned around, eyes twinkling. “Our Medicine God’s descended once more!”

“Hey, no need to push yourself, Pharmacist. I get that what we’re askin’ ain’t feasible.”

“It’s feasible. Just hold on.”

I didn’t feel guilty about turning down their request, but seeing them so disappointed honestly made me want to help more. I couldn’t do jack about the weather itself, but I could solve the mercenaries’ problem my own way. I headed to the lab.

Noela was in there as usual, rolling around. “Master! Noela bored.”

“How about helping me make something new?”

“On it!”

Following my medicine-making skill’s instructions, I gathered materials and got to work. Noela had been helping me for so long, she’d gotten really good at it, so the process went quickly.

 

Water Repellent: Prevents water damage and mold.

 

I couldn’t clear the skies, as the Red Cat Brigade had originally requested. When I thought about it, though, they wanted better weather because moldy leather armor was a pain in the ass. In other words, I just needed to make sure that the rain didn’t soak their gear.

Grabbing a brush, I took the water repellent into the drugstore. “If you coat something with this, it’ll be waterproof,” I told Annabelle and Doz.

Their eyes widened. “Waterproof?!”

“Uh-huh. Your stuff won’t get soaked, and you won’t have to deal with mold.”

Opening Doz’s umbrella, I brushed on some water repellent. To make the product easier to understand, I only spread it on half the fabric.

“Is that stuff really gonna keep the umbrella dry, Medicine God?” Doz found it hard to believe.

If I did a big ritual or something, I bet he’d buy in. Heh heh…I’ll show him.

“Just watch.” I walked outside into the downpour.

Pitter patter. Pitter patter.

Droplets fell atop the open umbrella. The fabric I’d painted stayed dry, but the rest soaked up the rain; water trickled down the handle, getting my hand wet.

Now I understood why the Red Cat Brigade’s armor was getting soaked. This shoddy umbrella couldn’t hold up against a rainstorm.

Setting the umbrella down tip first outside, I headed back into the drugstore with a victorious smile. Doz’s jaw had nearly hit the floor, and Annabelle was wide-eyed.

“Amazing!” they cried.

“The rain just slid off the painted spot, Boss!”

“You’re right! It turned into little beads of water!”

“This stuff is an aqua annihilator! Incredible, Medicine God!” Doz gave me a thumbs-up.

“Er…just to be clear, I’m not using magic to repel the water,” I reminded them.

“If we used this aqua annihilator on ourselves, we’d gain full water resistance!” Annabelle cried.

She’s not listening at all.

“You’re a genius, Boss!”

“Duh.”

“The Red Cat Brigade would be invincible when it rained!”

“Ooh! That’d be cool!”

“Right?!”

The two were their own echo chamber.

I had no idea whether the repellent would neutralize water magic. We had no mages here, so we couldn’t test it.

“Putting aside whether it’ll block water attacks, this stuff will keep your equipment from getting damp, so you won’t have to worry about mold,” I interrupted. “And it isn’t magic—got it?”

Doz elbowed me with a knowing look. “Come on, pal. We know you used anti-water magic to make this. You can’t fool us!”

“It’s because you guys think like that that I keep getting ridiculous requests,” I lamented.

Annabelle put some repellent on her gauntlets and stepped outside. She couldn’t help being impressed at its effects. “Whoa! This is crazy, all right!”

Doz bowed his huge frame. “Thank you so much, Medicine God! Now we can patrol without worrying about rainstorms!”

“Thanks, Pharmacist.” Annabelle mumbled her own words of gratitude.

“It was nothing at all.” I handed them the water repellent and saw them off.

The two had made a point of coming here for my help despite the heavy rain. I was glad I’d lived up to their expectations.

 

***

 

The next day, Paula walked over in the rain to hang out. She noticed the water repellent and decided to buy her own stock. Eventually, she starting selling it at the tool shop, saying something about customers using it for maintenance.

I also wound up getting a huge order from a bunch of carpenters. It was obvious what they would use the water repellent on—lumber for buildings.

And so I sat in the drugstore, watching the rain fall and hoping the water repellent would reduce the number of leaky houses around town.