Chapter 12: Bad at Drinking Parties

Chapter 12:
Bad at Drinking Parties

 

I WAS WATCHING THE STORE when someone whispered, “Sir Medicine God!”

Confused, I looked around and spotted Doz—the Red Cat Brigade’s vice captain—by the drugstore entrance. He looked around nervously, his massive frame hunched over.

“What’s up, buddy?” I called. “Is Annabelle with you?”

“The boss ain’t here.”

That’s odd. Wonder what happened. Doz usually dropped in with Annabelle.

The vice captain came toward the counter quietly and sat across from me. “Save me, Medicine God.”

“Oh, boy. This sounds bad.”

“No kidding. This time every year, the Red Cat Brigade rents the Rabbit Tavern for our annual party.”

Hunh. They have an annual party?

Actually, I remembered the Rabbit Tavern’s barmaid Rena telling me, “It’s party season, so we’re awfully busy! But, hey, busy periods aren’t bad!” At the time, I’d been surprised that the tavern had a “party season.” Apparently, one event was the Red Cat Brigade’s celebration.

“Wait,” I told Doz. “Why do you need my help with that? Won’t you guys just have a blast eating great food and getting drunk?”

“Well, Medicine God, the boss ain’t a drinker. And I’m a total lightweight. Everybody else gets loaded, though.”

“You’re not great with drinking parties, huh? I totally get it. I’ve never been big on them.” For a moment, I felt like I’d found a comrade.

However, Doz shook his head. “Really, it’s just…if everyone else gets smashed, and I barely finish my drink, how’s that gonna look to the boss?”

He seems nervous about explaining this in detail. Why is he concerned about Annabelle’s reaction, but not the others’? Ah…I get it. “You want to impress Annabelle.”

“That’s not…” Doz scratched his head shyly. “Well, yeah, basically.”

I understood why he wanted to look cool in front of her; Annabelle was stunning. “What’d you do last year?”

“I blacked out after a few mugs of beer. The next morning, I woke up in a barrel with the worst hangover. The boss laughed her butt off. This year, I wanna walk her home like a gentleman.”

As a man, and as the Red Cat Brigade’s vice captain, he wanted to overwrite last year’s party at any cost. Hunh.

“That’s why I need your help, Medicine God.”

“Gotcha,” I replied. “I totally understand how you feel, Doz. I’m a man too, you know?”

“Could you make a product that turns booze into water?”

“I’ll whip something up for you.”

Doz’s large, muscular hand clasped mine and shook it as he thanked me over and over. I understood now why he’d visited so furtively; he didn’t want Annabelle or the mercenaries to figure out what he was doing.

I had the vice captain wait while I headed to the lab. Regardless of whether Annabelle was his boss, there was only one reason a man would want to look good in front of a woman. That was why I wanted to help. I gathered the herbs I’d use off the shelves. A work party, huh? Maybe the drugstore should hold one too.

The lab door opened, and Mina and Noela entered. A sweet smell came from the kitchen.

“Made cookies, Master! Eat!” Noela presented me with a single star-shaped cookie.

I took the cookie with my teeth; it was so warm and crunchy, fresh out of the oven. “This is great!”

“Garroo!” Noela’s tail wagged at maximum speed. Swoosh!

Mina had brought a basket of cookies too. “We just baked these,” she told me. “I’ll leave them here, so help yourself, all right? Oh—would you like tea?”

“I’ll have some later, thanks.”

Noticing that I’d dirtied my hands preparing the herbs, Noela fed me another cookie.

As I kept working, I asked, “Hey, what do you two say to a get-together with the other drugstore employees?”

Mina tapped her chin. “If you’d like to do that, Mr. Reiji, we should! Now that Ejil and Vivi work here, I’d love to have a welcome event.”

Mina, Noela, and I did take a trip before. It might be nice to find time for all five of us to go somewhere.

“Noela want Vivi welcome party!” the werewolf girl exclaimed.

“What about Ejil?”

“Ejil whatever,” she answered immediately.

She really hates you, Ejil.

“C’mon, don’t say that,” I replied with a strained smile, then finished preparing the herbs. “All right, this should do it.”

 

Liver Ally X: Accelerates liver functions, breaking alcohol down more quickly. Prevents hangovers/vomiting due to intoxication.

 

I handed Doz the finished formula and explained its effects, directing him to take Liver Ally X before eating.

 

Another Side

 

DOZ DID AS Medicine God Reiji said, gulping down the new treatment concocted to help him stomach alcohol. He made sure to get rid of the empty bottle so that nobody at the party would find out what he’d gotten from the drugstore.

He was honestly skeptical of the Liver Ally X, but the medicine god had yet to steer him wrong. Doz figured there was no way Reiji would mess up.

“This doesn’t turn alcohol into water, got it?” Reiji had warned him, explaining that the Liver Ally X would just increase his alcohol tolerance.

After swallowing the treatment, Doz stood in front of the Rabbit Tavern. The other mercenaries were already inside, making toasts back and forth. He slapped both his cheeks gently.

“What the heck are you doin’ there?”

“Whoa!” Doz jumped and turned around to see Annabelle standing nearby. She was wearing her hair down instead of in her usual ponytail; it was sexy, in a way. “B-Boss, I didn’t see you there.”

“I can’t go inside while you’re in the way. Get your big ass in there!” She kicked Doz in the butt, causing him to groan.

The mercenaries cheered as Doz and Annabelle entered the tavern. Everyone had a wooden mug in hand, and the tables were already laden with tons of food.

“This is for you, Boss!” Rena, the Rabbit Tavern’s barmaid, handed Annabelle a mug of juice. She was used to the Red Cat Brigade’s yearly ritual. Doz also got a mug, but his was full of foamy ale.

“You all got your booze?” Annabelle called. “No need for dumb opening speeches, is there?”

“Who wants that junk?!” the mercenaries called.

“Damn straight. Cheers!”

“Cheers!” The entire brigade chugged their first drink, clearing their throats in tandem.

“Huh? I’m not feeling anything.” Doz put down his mug. He’d drained it, but the usual light blow to his brain didn’t come. “You’re seriously amazing, Medicine God!”

Each table Annabelle visited exploded with excitement. Not only was she a fantastic mercenary, but she really bloomed on the battlefield. More importantly, she truly cared for her men.

Annabelle approached Doz—who was posing victoriously—with a strange expression. “Is something up with you tonight?”

“I’m a brand-new man, Boss!”

“Well, ain’t you talking tough?”

They gently bumped their mugs together and gulped their second drinks. This year, the beer didn’t make Doz feel awful at all. “Rena, hon, get me another mug!”

“Er…are you sure?” Rena hesitated. “At the last party…”

Annabelle grinned and pointed at Doz. “Grab this oaf somethin’ to drink for my sake, Rena. He claims he’s a brand-new man!”

“Sure thing!” Rena replied, heading to the kitchen.

Doz made his way to the other tables, enjoying his fellow mercs’ company as he bumped his third mug against theirs. Drinks, conversation, food, more drinks, more stupid conversation—this was the first time he’d truly enjoyed one of these parties.

But what about Annabelle? Ain’t it lonely to be the only one sober?

Doz spotted the Red Cat Brigade’s captain leaving the tavern and trailed her.

“What’re you doin’ following me?” Annabelle barked. “Go enjoy the celebration.”

“I’m your second-in-command. This is where I belong, Boss.”

“That so?” Annabelle sat on the grass. Doz sat next to her. “Y’know,” she mused, “it’s a big deal that a merc brigade working outta a tiny town made it another year healthy and happy.”

“We’ve got your charm to thank for that, Boss! If I were in charge, things’d never be like this.” When they’d started out, Doz remembered, it was just him and Annabelle.

“The hell you talkin’ about? We got that motley crew this far half ’cause of you!”

Annabelle looked away. Her moonlit profile seemed all the more sophisticated, and her cheeks were pink. Doz knew that wasn’t just from the tavern’s heat and excitement. He was different tonight, and something in his heart exploded.

“Boss…!”

“Hmm?”

Grasping Annabelle’s shoulders, he puckered his lips.

“What’re you doin’, you dumbass?!” Annabelle yelped. “That’s gross!”

He passed out from agony as she kicked him square in the groin, then punched him four or five times in

the face. Doz’s last memory that night was the sound of bones breaking.

 

Reiji’s Side

 

“SO, THIS YEAR, you literally got knocked unconscious?”

“Er…yeah.”

“Dude, what’s wrong with you?!” I couldn’t help sighing loudly. “You had a good atmosphere going, and you just…ruined it!”

Doz had dropped in to discreetly tell me how the work party went. The broad-shouldered mercenary had massive, panda-like black eyes, and both cheeks had clearly taken several blows.

“Nah,” he insisted. “This year, I got to see the boss’s bashful expression. That alone was good enough for me!”

“You’re satisfied with that?! Stop being softhearted, old man!” I’d honestly been wrapped up in his puppy-love tale until halfway through.

“Reiji—no, Medicine God—it’s all thanks to that Liver Ally X that I had fun. Thanks so much!”

“Well, I’m glad I could help.” Guess Doz feels like it worked. “Fun is what it’s all about.”

“Plus, I deepened my bond with the boss,” the vice captain added. He excused himself with a friendly grin, marching his massive body out of the drugstore.

“You sure you didn’t ‘deepen’ the hole you’re digging yourself into?” I mumbled.

I found it fascinating to watch his relationship with Annabelle progress, and I decided to support him as much as I could if he needed help again. I just can’t leave that dumb vice captain hanging.