Chapter 9: Li’l Porky

Chapter 9:
Li’l Porky

 

NOELA SNIFFED the “black potion”—aka coffee—Mina was pouring into a mug. By all appearances, this would be a nice morning coffee break.

However, Mina was still somewhat perplexed. “Is that black potion really any good, Noela?”

“T-tasty! Mina just not understand.” Noela shook her head with her best jaded expression, continuing to pretend that she actually enjoyed coffee.

Noela’s discovered the thrill of getting on a high horse, I mused. I was genuinely enjoying the mug of black potion Mina had poured me.

“I can certainly see that Mr. Reiji enjoys it. But…”

Mina glanced at Noela, who sipped the black potion and grimaced. It was entirely clear that she hated the drink. Cocking her head again, Mina headed back to the kitchen, and the sound of dishwashing filled the house.

Noela trotted over to me. “Master?”

“What’s up?”

“Tasty potion…bitter.”

She was finally telling the truth. “You don’t have to force yourself to drink it, you know.”

“Noela want to enjoy!”

There was no way a kid like Noela could appreciate the flavor of coffee as dark as the name “black potion” implied. “Hmm. How to make coffee tastier…?”

Even kids enjoyed coffee with some milk or sweetener. If we had sugar, that would’ve been great, but sugar was apparently fairly valuable in Kalta. I thought honey might work; Mina used it whenever she made sweets.

“Honey would affect the coffee’s natural flavor, though,” I murmured. That meant I had no choice but to make gum syrup. I turned to Noela. “All right, got it! I’m going to create a new product that’ll let you enjoy this stuff.”

“That possible?”

I nodded. My medicine-making skill was great at extracting drinkable flavors.

“Groo!” Noela exclaimed happily, wagging her tail. “Noela help!”

“Thanks, pal.”

“Garroooo!”

The two of us headed to the lab right away. I gave Noela a sheet of paper with the ingredients I needed scribbled on it. While she found those, I prepared my tools. Noela worked efficiently, obviously excited by the prospect of a tastier black potion. If only she were this diligent when she works in the drugstore.

I smirked, watching as Noela finished up. “Master! These! No mistakes.”

Yup, she brought all the raw materials I’d requested. I extracted their sweetness, enriching the mixture repeatedly until I produced what I wanted.

 

Syrup: Sweet liquid extracted from honey and other ingredients.

 

I dipped my finger into the thick fluid and licked it. “Sweet.”

“Noela too! Noela too!” I handed her the bottle. She took a lick of the syrup as well. “Garoo?!” Noela was so overjoyed, her eyes seemed to fill with sparkling stars. She just kept licking her finger. “New tasty, Master!”

I could tell what was on her mind. “Just to be clear, this syrup isn’t for eating on its own.”

“Groo?”

Noela and I headed back to the dining room, and I mixed some syrup into her black potion. “That should go down easier.” It’d be even better if we added milk, but not today.

Noela took the mug from me, sniffing it. “Smell same.”

“Yeah, that’s normal.” If it smelled different, that would’ve been a problem.

Noela seemed skeptical about whether the black potion would taste any better, but she sipped it nonetheless. “The trace of sweetness beneath the bitterness is totally unlike fruit or honey! It blends beautifully with the flavor, and…”

She’s speaking normally—and giving tasting notes?! Guess I’ll take a sip too. I brought the mug to my lips. “Mmm. Yeah, that’s what I expected.”

“Decent tasty!” Noela declared, back to her usual self.

Decent, huh? I supposed the fact that coffee was bitter meant it couldn’t entirely be to Noela’s taste.

“But maybe addictive,” she added.

I put the syrup bottle in the middle of the table. “Feel free to use as much as you want.”

Noela sipped the black potion, tilting her head and adding more syrup repeatedly. Yup, she’s trying to completely erase what’s good about coffee. I asked permission to try her brand-new concoction.

“Mmmgh…sweet!” The drink was so cloying, I thought my brain would melt. Nothing about it tasted like coffee—it was just sweet black syrup. I’m not a rhinoceros beetle or some other desperate bug!

“This tasty, Master.”

“To you, at least.” I preferred the black potion plain.

Noela sipped away with a satisfied expression. I wasn’t going to stop her; there was no accounting for taste. So I thought, at least.

As the days passed, we went through a suspicious amount of syrup. However much I made, the stuff just vanished.

“Hey, Mina, have you been using the syrup to make sweets?”

“No, I haven’t baked anything recently.”

“I figured.”

If Mina were making desserts, I would’ve eaten some of them by now. That meant the only suspect was our little fluffball. Frankly, I should’ve asked her before Mina.

I headed to the drugstore, where Noela was working. “Hey, Noela, you’re using way too much syrup.”

“Grrrrroo?” Her voice was a little…deep. Her tail swung heavily instead of wagging with its usual speed. “Noela only use little, Master. Only little.”

It was hard to detect because I saw Noela every day…but when I scrutinized the werewolf girl, who was usually skinny, I could tell she’d gotten a bit round.

“Have you gained weight, Noela?”

“Noela can’t gain weight.”

“You’re getting plump.”

“No, no!” she argued in her deep, thick tone. She stuffed her hand into the bottle under her arm and then pulled it out, drizzling syrup into her mouth.

“I-I’ve seen this somewhere before!” I exclaimed. She’s turning into that beloved, world-famous yellow bear!

With each movement, Noela’s tummy jiggled. It was cute in its own way, but it wasn’t what was uniquely cute about Noela. Honestly, everything about her right now is the opposite of Noela normally.

“You’re not supposed to eat syrup on its own!”

“No take Noela’s tasty!”

“You’re chubby because you’re pigging out on this stuff.”

Noela shook her head. Her tail wagged more laboriously. “Noela no chubby. Still fine!”

“Oh, please!”

Just then, an elderly female customer greeted us. “Excuse me.”

“Ah, welcome!” Noela and I replied.

The old woman smiled warmly. “What an adorable little boar.”

“Gararrrooooo?!”

I smirked. “She called you a boar.”

“Noela no boar! Werewolf! Wolf!” Noela retorted, her tail thrashing. The force behind it was absurd; each wag seemed heavier than the last. Considering how light and fast her tail used to be, it was shocking.

“Is that so? Oh ho ho! Dear me. I’m sorry,” the old woman apologized.

I snickered, and Noela shot me a glare. “Garroo…!”

“Don’t look at me like that, porky.”

“Groo? ‘Porky’?”

“Pork’s a kind of boar meat.”

“No eat Noela!” I hadn’t said I was going to, but Noela shoved me forcefully nonetheless.

Mina was listening to our back-and-forth. She popped into the drugstore after the old woman left. “My, oh, my. My heart goes out to you, Noela! You’re all round now.”

Oof.

“After all the times you boasted that you couldn’t gain weight!” Mina continued. “For instance, when I was struggling with my own weight problems! Well, at any rate, we’ll rely on you as our counter boar from now on.”

Mina’s revenge began in earnest. Man, talk about a grudge.

After Mina laid into her, Noela was literally trembling. “No drink Master’s tasty anymore!”

Getting called a boar by a random customer really must’ve messed her up. And then Mina poured salt on the wound.

Noela wound up sticking to her declaration. She no longer drank syrup on its own; she even stopped drinking black potions. Since she managed to hold back, she slimmed down quickly.

“Arrrooooo!”

Her tail wagged quickly and lightly once again.