Chapter 309: I Will Always Love You

“How do you find this world?”

It sounded like a question a philosopher would discuss, or a weird thought that would pop into the head of a melodramatic intellectual like Ye Qingchang when she had nothing better to do.

But it was definitely not the kind of topic that would come up between Gou Yu and Zhu Niao.

Gou Yu’s expression was sincere, as sincere as when he asked Zhu Niao which was more cost-effective between inflated coupons and a bargain meal.

“It’s rotten,” Zhu Niao replied casually.

She always hated serious topics like this, whether at the engagement banquet or anywhere else.

Only when she was alone with Gou Yu could she set aside the urge to escape.

“Is it?”

Zhu Niao looked down at the book she had picked up as a makeshift shield.

She had no idea when she’d dropped it. On its dusty cover were four big characters—Happy Summer Vacation.

There weren’t many words written inside, and the answer key had been torn out as expected.

It probably wasn’t that happy.

“Then why do you think the world is rotten?”

Gou Yu’s voice was gentle, not at all intimidating like the tone he used in serious conversations.

Zhu Niao said nothing. Gou Yu knew she wouldn’t speak.

He wasn’t like a true rich young master who had traveled to countless places since childhood to experience local customs.

Everything he knew about such things came from documentaries, the same ones he had watched with Zhu Niao.

The most he could share about the world was to pat her on the shoulder and tell her about today’s discounts that she had missed.

He watched as she gazed out the window.

A thick cloud was slowly pulling the sunlight away from the earth.

The golden bamboo branches turned gray again, and the entire abandoned campus seemed to decay along with it.

Zhu Niao’s eyes were beautiful. Her black irises always held a liveliness like twinkling stars, but sometimes they looked dull and strangely alluring.

Gou Yu could see the fading sunlight in her eyes.

Neither of them spoke. The sunlight was being drawn away thread by thread, and Zhu Niao’s eyes grew dimmer.

“My existence doesn’t bring any benefit to anyone. Everyone thinks I’m a nuisance. I can’t meet anyone’s expectations either.”

She gently rubbed the homework book left behind by some student.

The pages were already dry and brittle, as if they would crumble with just a little more force.

She lowered her eyelids, like a cat that had done something wrong, even though a cat’s brain probably couldn’t figure out what it had done wrong.

Gou Yu didn’t answer right away.

He had felt the same way before, that the world was cold and hard, that no one in it liked him.

He would wear his dirty school uniform, with almost indelible black ink stains on the cuffs and lower abdomen, and sit alone in some empty place to think.

It seemed like the best solution: since everyone in the world hated you, why bother showing your face where people could see you?

You should just stay where no one knows you, grow quietly and wither, like a dandelion waiting for a wind that will never come.

“That’s not true,” Gou Yu said when he saw that the sadness in Zhu Niao’s eyes was about to solidify.

“What?”

“I said that’s not true.”

The boy’s white suit wasn’t a white dress, and he had a trench coat over it.

In the gloomy, abandoned classroom, he stood out like a white dot, bringing noise to break the silence.

Or like a tiny light, waiting to spread.

“The size and warmth of the world depend entirely on you. Every person you meet makes the world bigger for you. There are many people in this world: the Shanghai big shots, the Beijing elites, the Jiangxi brides who demand sky-high dowries, the naturally dark-skinned Guangdong people.”

“You don’t know most of them. Just like I said earlier, you only know the names of those places. You haven’t even been there, and there’s no one you want to visit there. So they aren’t part of your world.”

“There are many people in this world who hate you and don’t like you. But you don’t know them, so they aren’t part of your world either. There are also many people who might like you, but they aren’t part of your world. Your real world is actually very small—just the places you’ve been, the sunsets you’ve seen, and the close friends who care whether you live or die.”

Gou Yu never thought he was good with words, but he always had confidence at any moment.

He couldn’t say anything cultured, so in his memory, he always said stupid things.

But that didn’t mean he couldn’t say serious things.

Maybe he had never thought his words meant much, so he never spoke seriously.

Gou Yu stepped closer and reached out to touch Zhu Niao’s cheek. In her beautiful eyes, he could see his own reflection.

“Whether the world likes you depends on whether the people around you like you. Everyone has people around them. If they like you, then the world likes you.”

This was a serious occasion, facing their feelings directly.

So Gou Yu couldn’t crack a joke or laugh at this moment, but he also couldn’t be too serious and put pressure on Zhu Niao.

It was a bit difficult, but Gou Yu was willing to put in the effort.

Zhu Niao’s world was small, too small to hold more than a few people.

Like in the same classroom, Zhu Niao and Gou Yu sitting in the corner wouldn’t know the name or personality of the person in the opposite corner by the end of the semester.

She only had her roommates and him.

Actually, he could be more despicable. After all, Zhu Niao’s world only had a few people, and she couldn’t leave him.

But he wasn’t that despicable. He just said stupid things and squatted by the roadside with Zhu Niao to check out girls’ legs.

“What are you trying to say?” Zhu Niao’s eyes moved slightly, ripples spreading through the dim galaxy within them.

“What I’m trying to say is, you don’t have to win everyone’s approval. The people who don’t like you can go eat shit. As long as we’re here, as long as I still like you, then the world likes you. And if the world likes you, it’s gentle.”

Gou Yu looked at the girl before him.

She was so small, yet she cared about so many things, as if she could manage the penguins in Antarctica and the polar bears in the Arctic.

Zhu Niao was still insecure. Her inferiority outweighed everything.

Even if someone shouted in her ear with a loudspeaker, making her eardrums vibrate, she would pretend not to hear.

Running away was her norm.

“I will always love you.”