Volume 1, Chapter 5 – What the Hell? My Adam’s Apple Is Gone!

“Who is this girl? She doesn’t seem to be from our village, does she?”

“Nonsense! All the young women in our village have long fled to big towns or immortal sects for refuge. She must be some distant relative of the Huang family.”

“Look at her clothes—probably worth several taels of silver in total. And she’s so tall, with such a good figure. Clearly a wealthy young lady who’s never gone hungry a day in her life. Since when did the Huang family have relatives like this?”

“Since when do they need to report their relatives to you?”

“Well, no, but with the world in such chaos, how could her parents feel at ease letting a young girl travel alone to offer birthday wishes? If I had a daughter like her, I’d keep her at home like a treasured Buddha.”

“Why don’t you go ask her yourself? The emperor isn’t anxious, but the eunuch is.”

The villagers in the courtyard began chattering in hushed tones. Though they tried to keep their voices low, the sheer number of people made it impossible for Huang Qi not to overhear.

Already nervous about cross-dressing as a woman, Huang Qi panicked when he realized he had become the center of attention. He retreated into the main hall, not daring to step outside again. But before long, a middle-aged woman walked in.

She was in her fifties, lean, with rough skin weathered by years of sun and wind. Her patched-up coarse-cloth dress, however, was spotless, and her graying hair was neatly tied up in a bun—a clear sign of a capable woman.

Huang Qi knew her all too well—this was his mother, Li Fen.

After so long apart, Huang Qi missed her terribly and nearly called out instinctively. But just as the words reached his lips, he caught himself and swallowed them back with difficulty.

Li Fen was equally startled when she saw Huang Qi. Never in her wildest dreams had she imagined such an extravagantly dressed noble lady would appear in her home. The contrast with the humble surroundings was so stark that it practically illuminated the room.

But Li Fen had always been a sharp woman. Instead of interrogating the stranger, she politely greeted, “You’ve had a long journey, honored guest. Please, come sit outside.”

Huang Qi knew he couldn’t speak without giving himself away, so he set down his luggage and reluctantly stepped back into the courtyard. The moment he reappeared, the villagers’ eyes locked onto him again.

Huang Qi wished he could vanish into the ground. To make himself less conspicuous, he decided to find something to do and blend in.

His first thought was to help the men, but considering his current disguise, he abandoned that idea and joined the women in picking and washing vegetables.

“Vegetables” was a generous term—most were wild greens gathered from around the village. With the world shrouded in heavy yin energy, the sun barely showed its face, making crops impossible to grow. Even foraging for wild greens was a life-risking endeavor.

“A young lady like you shouldn’t be doing such rough work! Leave it to us.”

Several women tried to stop him.

But Huang Qi stubbornly insisted, forcing his way into the task. He wasn’t worried about his hands being seen—who said a woman’s hands had to be soft and delicate? The hands of the village women around him weren’t much different from his own. Besides, no one here knew Fairy Hongling.

“A noble lady like you, yet your hands are so rough? Do you do manual labor yourself?”

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One of the aunties noticed Huang Qi’s hands and gasped in surprise.

Unable to speak, Huang Qi could only nod awkwardly.

“Heavens! Such discipline in your upbringing—your father must be a remarkable man!”

“Not like those two women of Huang Long and Huang Bo’s—plain-looking yet acting like pampered noble ladies, refusing to lift a finger. They’re nowhere near as refined as you, miss.”

“Keep your voice down, don’t let them hear.”

“What’s there to fear? Who knows where they’ve run off to fool around anyway?”

The older women around him showered him with flattery. The Huang Long and Huang Bo they mentioned were his cousins—the sons of his second uncle.

Huang Qi’s face burned with embarrassment, but the praise did ease his nerves somewhat. What he didn’t know was that his parents were watching him intently from behind the hall door.

“Husband, have you seen that girl before?”

Li Fen whispered to her husband beside her.

“No. Maybe some distant relative?”

Her husband, Huang Kairong, guessed. He was dark-skinned, slightly taller than his wife, but not by much.

“You haven’t even met her, yet you call her a distant relative?”

Li Fen glared at him in frustration.

“Ah, we have relatives we haven’t seen in decades. You know what they say—a girl changes eighteen times before adulthood. How could I recognize every junior?”

Huang Kairong shrugged helplessly.

“Is that so?”

Li Fen remained skeptical but finally said, “Fine. When she presents her gift, I’ll make sure to find out her background.”

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After helping for a while, Huang Qi noticed that the villagers weren’t just putting on a show like the couple who had left earlier. This eased his mind a little. Even better, no one had brought up his bachelor status yet.

“If they know their place, then everyone’s happy. I don’t necessarily have to show off.”

Huang Qi decided inwardly. After all, there was no point in flaunting anything—he wasn’t a vain person. At most, he’d play the role of his “fiancée” to please his family, and that would be it.

But his peace was short-lived.

Just then, a burst of laughter erupted at the entrance.

Huang Qi turned to see four young men and women walking in. The two men were his cousins—Huang Long and Huang Bo. Huang Long was dark-skinned and lanky, while Huang Bo was fair and slightly plump. In terms of looks, they weren’t much better than Huang Qi himself. But their silver tongues were their greatest asset—the main reason they had managed to find partners.

The two women with them were naturally their girlfriends. Their looks were… unremarkable, to say the least. One was short and scrawny like a monkey, the other old enough to be his mother. And their chests were flatter than a board—a telltale sign of lifelong malnutrition.

Huang Qi wasn’t surprised. In these times, any girl with even a hint of beauty had fled to big towns or immortal sects. Those stuck in the countryside couldn’t possibly be much to look at.

Though they were cousins, Huang Qi couldn’t be bothered to spare them a glance. During his previous visits, these two had been the loudest in mocking him, showing zero respect for their elder.

Meanwhile, Huang Bo had been stealthily eyeing Huang Qi’s cross-dressed figure. Through the semi-transparent veil, he could vaguely make out the contours of a pretty face. Combined with the luxurious attire and the alluring curves, it was impossible not to stare.

“Who’s that gaudily dressed vixen? Why are you staring at ‘her’?”

Huang Bo’s girlfriend—the monkey-like woman named Qu Zhen—finally noticed and hissed in displeasure.

“I wasn’t!”

Huang Bo replied without turning his head, his shamelessness on full display.

“Liar! If you like her so much, why don’t I just leave?”

Qu Zhen flared up, pretending to stand.

“No, no! My dear, I was wrong, alright?”

Huang Bo hurriedly apologized. It had taken him immense effort to land this girlfriend—if they broke up, where would he find another? He didn’t want to end up a despised bachelor like his cousin.

“Huang Bo, that woman’s face is covered—she’s probably hideous. Aren’t you afraid of burning your eyes?”

Huang Long’s girlfriend, Xie Mei, quickly soothed her future sister-in-law. She looked to be in her thirties.

Qu Zhen nodded in agreement. “Sister Mei’s right. Later, I’ll sneak over and yank off her veil.”

“Ladies, please don’t cause trouble. Judging by her clothes, she doesn’t seem like an ordinary person. What if we offend someone we shouldn’t?”

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Huang Long pleaded meekly.

“Coward!”

Qu Zhen rolled her eyes disdainfully. She clearly had no respect for her future brother-in-law. After all, in these times, women’s status had risen—they no longer followed the old rules of obedience.

“Too bad. Her veil is tied in multiple knots—probably can’t be pulled off.”

Xie Mei observed regretfully.

Huang Qi wasn’t paying attention to the four of them, because the gossipy women beside him had already started discussing him.

“I heard Huang Qi found a girlfriend and is bringing her back this time. Now all the Huang family’s younger generation will have partners—how enviable!”

“Pfft, who told you that?”

“His parents said it themselves. Would they lie?”

“And you believe that? They’re just embarrassed that their nephews have girlfriends while their son doesn’t, so they made up a story.”

“Don’t say that. They’re all Huang family descendants. Huang Qi even studied immortal techniques—if Huang Long and Huang Bo can find partners, why can’t he?”

“What a joke! Have you seen how Huang Qi’s eloquence compares to his cousins’? And as for immortal techniques—can someone kicked out of an immortal sect even be called a cultivator? In all these years, have you ever seen him perform a single spell? If he could find a girlfriend, my son would’ve had a harem by now.”

“But Huang Kairong and his wife have already boasted about it. What if everyone doesn’t see their daughter-in-law later?”

“Then we’ll just laugh at them. What’s it to you?”

The gossipmongers, seeing Huang Qi’s parents busy inside, snickered in low voices.

“My father told people I have a girlfriend?”

Huang Qi was stunned. Why would his father lie? Knowing full well he was likely doomed to bachelorhood, wasn’t he afraid of being humiliated later?

“Ah, I see. Dad’s really clever!”

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After a moment’s thought, Huang Qi understood his father’s plan. First, instruct him in the letter to come home late. Then spread the news of his “girlfriend”. Since no one could verify it, no one would dare mock him during the birthday celebration.

Of course, there was a glaring flaw—sooner or later, people would see him, and the lie would collapse. But so what? By then, the birthday banquet would be over. Let them mock all they wanted.

“Girl, why are you wearing a scarf in broad daylight?”

One of the aunties suddenly asked Huang Qi.

Unable to answer, Huang Qi simply shook his head. The scarf was crucial—it hid his Adam’s apple. Removing it would expose his true gender.

The women’s expressions turned strange. Some even subtly edged away, likely suspecting he had some skin disease.

Nearby, Qu Zhen overheard the conversation and smirked, whispering to Xie Mei:

“Sister Mei, that vixen is wearing both a veil and a scarf. Could she really have some disease?”

“Who knows? But she does seem suspicious, like she’s hiding something.”

Xie Mei mused.

Qu Zhen hesitated for a moment before suddenly standing up and walking toward Huang Qi’s back.

“Where are you going?”

Xie Mei asked, puzzled.

“Her scarf isn’t tied in knots.”

Qu Zhen grinned mischievously.

Huang Qi was washing dishes on a stool when he suddenly felt a tug at his neck. A cold breeze slipped under his collar—his scarf had been yanked away.

His heart stopped. Without thinking, he instinctively clamped a hand over his throat. The rough skin could be exposed, but his Adam’s apple—a dead giveaway—could not.

But the next second, his legs nearly gave out.

Because his fingers touched only smooth, delicate skin.

There was no Adam’s apple.

‘What the hell? Where’s my Adam’s apple?!’

Huang Qi frantically groped his neck in horror.