Chapter 164

Dan Haru is the Selected Regressor.

He'd already been suspicious for a good while, but at the decisive piece of evidence he'd finally caught, Hajin's eyes lit up.

Hey. Anything you can pull up right now — Dan Haru's traits or whatever? Use your permissions a little. I think it's him.

F-Fixed Regressor-nim…!

What. Ah — hurry, come up with a sudden quest or something. This is a lock.

N-no, that's part of it too! O-of course it's important, but…!

What's more important than nailing the Selreg bastard. Ah, don't you have some reward you've been stashing? Dig around, you punk. Am I the only one taking catching the Selreg seriously? Just like the head office guys — hand off the subcontracting and wash their hands of it….

Th-they're announcing 3rd place right now!

In the thrill of finally having found him, Hajin had briefly forgotten they were in the middle of the results announcement — and at Thirteen's words, he snapped back to attention.

1st, 4th, 5th, and 6th had all already come out.

If 2nd was Jung Siwoo as expected, then 3rd would probably be either Lee Yugeon or himself.

No — it had to be.

Whoa shit, what do I do if I really do end up 3rd? My heart is pounding like crazy right now.

Aaagh, I can't watch…!

Hey. Can we just do that thing Retty pulled last time? Fast-forward?

You serious? (ʘ言ʘ╬) ?

…that's how nervous I am, you idiot.

At times like this Thirteen always came charging in — so Hajin quickly looked away.

And at last, the fateful 3rd-place announcement came.

"The 3rd-place trainee is…! Trainee Jung Siwoo!"

What? Who?

At the completely unexpected result, Hajin — who by now had entirely forgotten that Dan Haru was a dark-sided baby-bunny hero who'd lost it from regressing — went wide-eyed.

Jung Siwoo? Jung Siwoo's 3rd? Is this insane?

Then what rank does that make me?

From that exact moment on, Kang Hajin's lips started going bone dry.

Some kind of ridiculous premonition came creeping up the back of his neck.

No, insane, please, no way.

There are all kinds of factors that swing a finals result.

For starters, Miro Maze was an in-house survival, so the reflection of the company's opinion — including the New Talent Development team — couldn't be brushed off,

and the switch to one-pick voting after the second cut ceremony would have had some effect too,

"Only two of Kairos's wings remain. Just 2nd and 7th."

like complacency setting in among fans of upper-rank trainees,

or a wake-up call hitting fans of trainees stuck in the lower ranks,

"So then, we'll announce the second wing of Kairos. The 2nd-place trainee."

or light viewers who'd sworn off survival shows for how draining they were, but figured well, it's the finals, might as well see how it ends, and tuned in,

or cases where a trainee flat-out unleashed their potential on the live-broadcast stage and snatched viewer votes in real time….

And, and… what else was there.

"A trainee who's always surprised the Destis with fresh, new stage concepts, execution, and versatile talent."

Or….

Something that had really lodged itself in the general public's mind heading into the finals could just as easily drive a bounce.

Like being willing to take the flak and making a candid statement in an official setting, kicking off a massive self-policing reaction inside the fandom that in turn bumped up total viral volume.

Or pulling an image transformation at the finals and blowing up in the last stretch as a massive visual shock across the idol scene.

Or an eliminated trainee posting a heartwarming story on personal SNS along with support for a specific trainee.

Or word belatedly reaching a senior singer's fandom that the surprise event during their 1st-place proxy award had been a specific trainee's idea — that could be a variable too.

Because that fandom might then run a kind of thank-you vote of their own.

Ah, along similar lines, there was also this kind of thing.

An ex-girl-group solo singer, sorry that agency colors had kept a certain trainee from ending up as her actual direct junior, posting a vote-drive message to her fandom asking them to please vote for the admirable trainee who'd sung her song at his audition.

Ah come on, no way. This really is impossible.

Kang Hajin, without realizing it, was standing right in the path of the butterfly effect that had come sweeping toward him.

"The trainee who will become Kairos's new wing at final 2nd place!"

That split second.

Kang Hajin's heart was ready to burst.

"…Trainee Kang Hajin!"

A roar of cheers went up.

And in front of his eyes, a window welcome enough to bring tears floated up.

title: Single Quest 02 'The Crazy One Around Here Is Me!' content: You who have entered (or will enter) Miro. Overcome the suffocating politicking and one-upmanship going on inside, meet the Comrades who will help you, and successfully debut. — Clearing hidden bombs lowers regression-trigger probability and raises quest success rate. remaining: 6 months success reward: A clue for tracking down the Regressor Congratulations, Fixed Regressor-nim! (*≧∀≦*)

Kang Hajin looked out at the audience with an I can't believe this expression.

Out of all those people, astonishingly, only the ones holding up merch with his name on it, calling out for him, came into his sight.

Someone up close to the stage, running a phone LED app that spelled out ★My star Hajin, congrats on debut★, was already crying.

"…ah."

Past however many timelines he'd lost count of.

In this one timeline where he'd fought tooth and nail for the sole purpose of protecting this life.

"…ah, this really is impossible."

Kang Hajin grasped hold of the shining dream he'd dreamed for the first time in his life.

---

"When I…. when I stood in this spot, there was so much I wanted to say…."

I'm done for.

I can't think of a single thing I'm supposed to say.

It wasn't just that my head was blank — it was like the empty Word doc on the night before an assignment deadline, cursor blinking with nothing on the page.

How on earth did the guys before me talk?

Lee Doha. I'm sorry I got surprised watching you give your debut remarks. You were actually fucking composed.

Still not really grasping that this was real, unable to hide how dazed I was, I gripped the mic tight in both hands. My hands were shaking so hard I felt like I'd drop it if I wasn't careful.

"Uh, um…. Honestly, I didn't even think I'd be able to debut at a rank this high."

3rd, if I got lucky.

7th at best — that's what I'd thought.

And even if it had gone that way, I wouldn't have been all that disappointed.

Because for me, just the fact that I'd debuted carried enormous meaning.

"But now that I'm actually standing up here…. So many thoughts are crowding my head, I don't know what to start with. But I'm really not the kind of person who can't get the words out like this, you know…? You know, right?"

The bad habit of blurting out nonsense whenever I got nervous had come out true to form again this time.

I didn't even know what I was saying — I'd just tossed it out — and from somewhere in the audience, a shout close to a scream came back: We know!!!!!! At that, the audience, and me too, ended up bursting into laughter.

Only then did my locked-tight shoulders loosen a little, and the usual feeling come back into my body.

Mic in hand, I thought first of the people I had to thank before anyone else.

"…first, and for the longest time, the people who believed in my 'potential' — my mom and dad."

Kang Hajin thought back to a day from very long ago.

To his parents, listening to this line right now, it wouldn't have been all that long ago.

—Would you quit with the potential talk.

—What's the matter, Hajin. Mom believes in you. You can absolutely do this.

—Mom, sometimes I….

—…….

—…I'm scared of my nothing-special future. Scared you'll be disappointed.

—Hajin-ah.

—When you believe in me this much, if I don't manage to do something with it, then it really is all on me, isn't it.

—…….

—So just let me do something else. Not the thing with 'potential' — something I'm actually good at.

There had definitely been moments when that unconditional trust felt like shackles.

Hajin had been scared of every moment he was failing.

He wanted to rationalize his own steady slide into nothing-special and just live comfortably, but the bigger the expectations and belief his parents placed in him grew, the more pathetic the version of himself who couldn't live up to that looked.

"Thank you for raising me into a son who can repay that faith."

But looking back —

what had let him get up again, every single time, from the pit of that failure and fear — was nothing other than his parents' belief.

"…the fact that I can finally prove that Mom and Dad were right — that's what makes me happiest."

Hajin knew exactly what kind of things his parents heard from the people around them.

He also knew what his parents had lain awake worrying about every night, under all the concern-dressed lecturing and meddling of how can you raise your kids that way when you can't afford it.

"So from now on, brag about your son with your head held high."

I'm so glad I could become your pride.

That one line he just barely swallowed back inside his mouth.

Because he had no intention whatsoever of stopping at debut for this achievement.

That line — for a little later, once he'd climbed to somewhere a bit higher up.

He decided to save it for then.

"My most precious friend, Kang Hawon. You watching?"

Next up was a message aimed at his little brother, whose HP by now had to be running near empty.

"Hyung told you, right. That this life, I was going to try being an idol."

Hajin's lips pulled into a wide, easy smile.

"…hyung did it. Now it's your turn. Good luck with the entrance exams, kid."

Recalling how, right around this time of year, in the previous life, Hawon had struggled hard with entrance-exam stress, Hajin put real feeling into his message of support. Then the camera director, catching the moment, panned to Hawon sitting in the family seats. When Hawon — hair natural without a thing in it, in a neat button-down shirt — appeared on the big screen, cheers went up again from the audience.

Watching on the screen as Hawon, looking like he was about to cry any second, held up his slogan, Hajin fought hard to keep his own throat from bobbing. Crying here too would really make him the crybaby with no hope of coming back from it.

"And last of all…."

Last of all, I had to give thanks to the Destis who'd picked me….

"Last of all…."

was what I wanted to do….

"…nnngh, ah, seriously!"

Just give up…. Giving up makes it easier…. The System, at this point, shakes its head, saying maybe you've been a leaky-faucet person all along.

Hajin, unable in the end to hold back the tears welling up, covered his eyes with his arm and let the crying burst out.

Ironically, at Hajin's tears, the venue filled with an even bigger roar of cheers.

Far off at the MC seat, Seo Taeil grabbed tissues and came rushing over to Hajin. Hajin took the tissues Taeil handed him, dabbed at his eyes, and barely managed to continue his remarks.

"Last of all — ah, so — to every single Desti who picked me, who cheered me on!"

You have no idea how much I've wanted to say this.

Only to himself did Hajin think it, and with a proud smile he delivered the last of his remarks.

"I am proud of you."

Really — this line, he'd wanted to say without fail.

"Not simply because you picked me — but for the miracle and the love you've shown along the way to bring me here, I'm proud, and I'm grateful."

At every crossroads of every regression he'd been through so far, he knew that in the end, without these people, nothing could have been changed.

"…thank you for being my pride."

Hajin put real feeling into it and bowed at the waist.

It was the last bow of 'Trainee Kang Hajin,' and the first of 'Kairos's Kang Hajin.'