Chapter 362: Selfish

“Xiaoyuan, I’ve always been here…”

The man murmured softly in Lin Xinyuan’s ear as before, his gaze filled with love and heartache, carrying a trace of warmth that seeped into her heart.

But she still couldn’t help but twitch continuously, her lips already pale, tears streaming down her face, without the strength to utter even half a sentence.

Clearly, the struggle in the water not long ago and the pain throughout her body now had consumed much of her strength.

Immediately following was the Self-Harm Impulse that had not visited for a long time, still rapidly accumulating, pressing upon her.

Lin Xinyuan clenched her teeth desperately, struggling with all her might just to barely slow that speed, the corners of her eyes twitching.

“Wuu wuu wuu…”

Seeing this, Qin Nanfeng merely smiled, then he extended his hand to Lin Xinyuan’s mouth, using a tone as if coaxing a child: “Be good, if it hurts, bite down.”

“No… no… hurt… mm…”

Lin Xinyuan’s heart was full of resistance, forcing these words through her teeth, her eyes brimming with tears, crystalline drops sliding from the corners.

But Qin Nanfeng still extended his sturdy forearm to her mouth, and at this moment she could no longer control herself, biting down with tears in her eyes: “Don’t… I don’t want to bite… wuu wuu…”

The instant her teeth touched flesh, the pleasure of torment in Lin Xinyuan’s heart began to erode her.

She really wanted to see bright red now, as if only that could delay her pain, but at the same time that love completely conflicted with it.

Under this collision, even her usually clear eyes were filled with struggle and pain, her expression gradually becoming dazed, nearly losing her reason.

Qin Nanfeng’s gaze was gentle, but his slightly trembling thin lips revealed his not-so-calm inner self: “Think of Yi Yi… Yi Yi is crying…”

These words brought back some of Lin Xinyuan’s consciousness that had nearly sunk into the swamp.

“Yi… Yi… Xiao Yiyi…” Lin Xinyuan’s pupils quaked, her gaze constantly shifting.

At this moment, bits and pieces of herself and her daughter… the whole family flashed through her mind…

“Ah ah… ugh…” As she thought, she helplessly clutched her head, a splitting headache, but still forced herself to remember.

Her thoughts were like flipping pages of a book, until the cry of her daughter she heard the moment she fell into the water not long ago overlapped with the faint crying she could hear from not far away now…

Gradually, Lin Xinyuan’s eyes became clear, and her mouth slowly lost its strength.

But because of the excessive pain, she had no strength left at this moment, only leaning weakly in the man’s arms.

She closed her eyes, but her hand unconsciously grabbed Qin Nanfeng’s forearm that she had just bitten, murmuring unconsciously: “It hurts…”

“Sleep…”

Qin Nanfeng ignored the wound that had broken skin and started to bleed, feeling nothing.

After all, compared to that time at North Mang Mountain, this time was much lighter, he still used a child-coaxing tone to soothe his Xiaoyuan: “It will be fine when you wake up… everything will be fine… don’t worry…”

Perhaps because of excessive fatigue, or perhaps because Qin Nanfeng’s words were very convincing, Lin Xinyuan’s originally somewhat rapid breathing gradually became steady.

Her little head tilted, completely losing strength, resting in his arms.

“Xiaoyuan… sleep…”

Before Lin Xinyuan’s consciousness fell into darkness, all she could hear was this gentle male voice, full of security, allowing her to enter dreamland peacefully.

Staring at the person who had completely fallen asleep, Qin Nanfeng gently wanted to put her down, to let his little wife’s head rest on his lap.

But he found that even asleep, this girl’s hand still clung tightly to his waist, unable to be pulled away.

Qin Nanfeng felt both heartache and helplessness, but in the end just smiled, continuing to silently stare at Lin Xinyuan.

But soon he seemed to think of something, then nodded to his friends not far away.

Seeing this, Li Tang and the others carefully hurried over, and at a glance saw the person nestled in Qin Nanfeng’s arms, already asleep, with a serene sleeping face.

“A Yuan… are you okay…”

Li Tang asked cautiously, her voice also very low, as if afraid of waking Lin Xinyuan.

As she spoke, her gaze flickered, seeing Qin Nanfeng’s forearm that had been bitten, her eyes somewhat uncertain.

Although the others didn’t speak, they also looked at Qin Nanfeng, with similar meaning.

However, Qin Nanfeng just shook his head: “It’s fine now…”

Regarding Lin Xinyuan’s symptoms, Qin Nanfeng didn’t speak carelessly. Explaining it this way was simply to reassure Li Tang and the others.

After all, this kind of thing… simply cannot be explained by common sense…

Originally, the relative calm of these four years had made him think his wife was almost better.

Until now, he understood that “she” had never given up, which caught him off guard…

The only good news was that from this time, “her” momentum was truly weakening, this time was obviously much weaker than the outbreak at North Mang Mountain, which was the best comfort for Qin Nanfeng amidst his self-blame…

Hearing this, Li Tang and the others looked at each other, seeming to think of something, but in the end they didn’t speak.

Qin Nanfeng smiled and told them to go play first, while he would take good care of Lin Xinyuan.

The group had no choice, but felt a little relieved in their hearts, and could only leave again, thinking not to disturb the two…

Before leaving, Li Tang wanted to pull the crying Qin Yiyi along, but the usually obedient little one was stubbornly unwilling this time, and in the end Li Tang could only helplessly give up.

The little one was clearly frightened badly, her tender white face still covered with tears, crying like a Little Calico Cat.

“Daddy… Mommy…”

She carefully approached her parents, her usual lively appearance drooping like a wilted flower.

Although the clever little one didn’t understand this sudden situation, she clearly knew that Mommy was really in danger then, making her feel helpless and scared…

Seeing his daughter’s teary-eyed little appearance, Qin Nanfeng smiled, his tone gentle: “It’s really fine, Mommy just had a leg cramp earlier, and now she’s tired and wants to sleep… Xiao Yiyi be good… go play…”

But to these words, little Qin Yiyi still didn’t believe, she just kept shaking her head: “No… Daddy… Daddy is lying…”

Qin Yiyi said while sobbing: “Yi Yi… Yi Yi doesn’t want to go anywhere… Yi Yi wants to wait for Mommy to get up first…”

“Yi Yi wants Mommy to smile… Yi Yi playing alone is no fun at all…”

After saying this, the little one just quietly sat beside her parents, her big eyes unblinking as she stared at the sleeping Lin Xinyuan, crying uncontrollably, her clear bright eyes unable to hide her sadness.

“Xiao Yiyi…”

Qin Nanfeng murmured, looking at his daughter who was so sensible at such a young age, feeling a myriad of emotions in his heart.

Both pride, and also guilt and self-blame…

So… he knew even more clearly how much of a bastard he was in his memories…

Clearly before being together he was so sworn, with vows of eternal love… but in the end when he learned the truth, he was the one who backed down?

So… he had always been a selfish bastard.

Making his family worry was one thing, but he also made his Xiaoyuan fall into that kind of painful situation.

But precisely because he was a selfish dog, he also knew what he wanted now.

He wanted Lin Xinyuan, didn’t want her to continue sinking into the swamp…

Even if he had to throw himself into this other swamp, he must do it!

This was… the meaning of his return…

Unconsciously, Qin Nanfeng thought again of the daughter in his memories who left the world with his wife right after birth…

Thinking this, the man’s gaze toward Xiao Yiyi became even more gentle and guilty.

In this life, he only wished to protect them well…