Etiquette Dictates That Names Be Asked in Swahili – Part 02

Leaving Haruna in Eu’s and Sera’s care, I headed to school. I forced down the restlessness in my chest and cast my gaze out the classroom window.

The sky was a perfect gray, beautifully overcast. Honestly, with weather like this, we didn’t need to wait until night to hold the event.

“Aikawa.”

I looked down. From the school gate to the slope leading up, across the courtyard and the covered walkways, students bustled about, busy with festival stall preparations.

“Aikawa!”

Today was the festival, a once-a-year celebration. The noisy, rowdy event Haruna had been looking forward to.

“Hey, Aikawa!”

A spiky-haired guy across the room kept flashing his glasses.

“What? Quit shining those annoying glasses at me.”

“Forget about my glasses! Where’s Haruna? She was all fired up about helping with decorations, wasn’t she?”

Huh. So that’s how excited she’d been. She must be frustrated right now.

“What’s with the creepy look, man?” Orito flicked me on the forehead.

“Look who’s talking.”

I rubbed the sore spot and glanced back outside.

A girl in a strange outfit dashed in from the school gate, weaving her way through the stalls. She was wearing casual clothes, except her casual was plate armor and gauntlets. One hell of a fashion choice. She sprinted toward the school building. On her head, a magnificent cowlick bobbed wildly with every step, a sign that she was doing well.

“Huh? Is that… Eu?” Orito said.

“No, just a Magiclad Girl,” I replied.

Orito gave me a look that said, What the hell are you talking about?

“Ah, Miss Haruna.”

About twenty seconds later, Haruna slid into the classroom and shoved a sketchbook at me.

“I’m back!” was written on it in huge, round letters.

Her face brimmed with life, nothing deadpan about it. But her expression was locked in place.

“Haruna.”

Wham! Haruna’s flying kick smacked me in the cheek.

“How dare you leave me behind.”

She smacked the sketchbook hard against her hand. No need to pound it like that. I was reading just fine.

“Are you really okay now?” I asked.

“Shut the hell up!”

Whack! She backhanded me across the cheek with the gauntlet.

“You were saying you were gonna die.”

Wham! This time she slapped me with the sketchbook so hard I thought my neck would spin 180 degrees. Why always the same spot? I was going to end up a lumpy-faced zombie.

Anyway, it looked like she’d calmed down. She couldn’t talk anymore, though. The ability that made her words come true must already be active.

If she stood there, legs planted wide in her usual defiant pose, just to stop me from worrying, then I had to act like nothing had changed too.

“No whining allowed!”

“Got it. Sorry for worrying about you.”

“Your concern is the grossest thing in the whole universe.”

That bad? I couldn’t tell if she meant it seriously, but I understood what Haruna was trying to say. She came to enjoy the school festival. She didn’t want gloomy talk.

“Are you cosplaying Eu?” Orito asked. “You look cute in anything.”

“Shut up, dumbass.”

Her written words were sharper than any spoken sentence. Orito cried.

“Is something wrong with Miss Haruna?” Hiramatsu couldn’t hide her confusion at the bizarre scene.

“Eh, she probably just got SWAT mixed up with the Crusaders,” I said. “Also, she’s got a bit of a cold, so she can’t speak.”

Hiramatsu muttered, “Oh… I see,” and gave up pressing the matter.

“Hurry up and get to work, ‘kay?”

Once Haruna took command, everyone naturally started moving efficiently.

Our homeroom teacher, who should’ve been in charge, sat like me, staring out the window, lost in thought. Still the same, useless teacher.

Yokai drawings we’d made last night with Eu and Sera were being posted on the walls. Saul and Pippa, Thunder Hawk, Maitreya—correction: a kappa.

Lined up like this, they looked surprisingly profound. Among them, Eu’s yokai, the Kotatsu Lion, was wildly popular with the girls.

“So cute,” Hiramatsu said, gazing dreamily at the male lion in the kotatsu.

Tomonori, Anderson, and Mihara came over from the neighboring class.

“Aikawa! We came to help!” Tomonori called.

Right, her class was doing an exhibition. The preparations must’ve finished quickly.

“By the way, what’s that at the door?” Mihara grinned, hand over her mouth, giving me a weird look.

What did she mean by that?

They led me out of the classroom, and there it was by the door. A mannequin modeled after me. Haruna, you bitch. She didn’t throw it out.

The students in the hallway seemed so impressed they’d forgotten to laugh. How I wished the concept of laughter itself vanished entirely. Mihara’s stupid guffaw, however, triggered a flood of laughter from everyone else.

I buried my face in my hands, waging an epic battle against shame in my mind.

“This is really well done,” Anderson said, tapping me—the mannequin—curiously. It wobbled.

“This is awesome!” Orito burst out laughing. I wished his head would just go nuclear right there.

I said nothing and went back into the classroom.

“Huh? Hey, Aikawa,” Tomonori called, puzzled. “You’re not angry?”

“No. There’s no point in getting angry anyway.”

Damn it. If it weren’t for Haruna’s current condition, I’d take it down immediately, but I couldn’t say anything. At the very least, I wanted her to do whatever she liked, whatever stupid thing she wanted.

That strange, almost parental feeling outweighed my embarrassment.

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It turned three in the afternoon, and though the sun hadn’t set yet, the night festival began.

At some schools, outsiders couldn’t attend their festivals, but at ours, anyone could come and go freely. In fact, members of the local community sometimes helped out at the food stalls and such.

It was probably that kind of interaction that made the night festival possible. Normally, no one would agree to a sudden nighttime ruckus, after all.

The so-called Yokai Café was really just a yakisoba stand. Well, that was about what you’d expect from a school setting.

They apparently had drinks too: regular coffee, tomato juice for the yokai theme, and then Hakkaisan Kongoshin—wait, that’s Junmai Daiginjo,^[1] top quality saké! Who the hell brought alcohol to the school festival?

Our homeroom teacher, Mr. Drab, clapped his hands. “All right, I’ll be playing a fake customer here, so feel free to move around.”

This slacker went and bought booze for himself, huh?

“Ah, I love alcohol. Feels like I could go back in time.”

Leaving the teacher to their drink, we formed a circle and discussed our plan.

My shift at the stall would start at 5 p.m. For now, I figured I’d walk around the school until nightfall.

While checking my wallet, Haruna’s gauntleted hand tugged on my blazer.

“What’s up?”

“Let’s go.”

The girl in front of me was full of energy. She seemed fully ready to enjoy the festival she’d been looking forward to so much. Instead of wearing a blank expression, her face stayed fixed in her trademark annoying grin.

“You sure you’re okay?”

“Piece of cake.” Haruna gave me a thumbs-up.

“What about Sera and Eu? If we’re gonna walk around, we should go together.”

“Shut up! Let’s go!” Haruna grabbed my hand angrily.

“Oops.”

A male student making yakisoba for the homeroom teacher, our first customer, slipped. A scraper thing, the kind you use on an iron plate, flew through the air. What’s that thing called again? A flipper? Ah, a spatula. The spatula went flying.

Since I was this bewildered, I didn’t even try to dodge, so the corner ended up poking me right in the eye.

“Aikawa!” Hiramatsu rushed over. What a nice girl.

In contrast, Haruna held her mouth shut. She didn’t look shocked. She was stifling a laugh. Right, laughing would give her a massive headache.

“A-Are you okay?”

Honestly, no, I wasn’t okay. If I weren’t a zombie, I’d probably be blind.

Now, the question was whether what just happened was a mere coincidence or fate.

Haruna was excited to explore the festival, so misfortune struck the person closest to her—me. Did such a ridiculous thing really happen just now, or was it just plain bad luck?

“A-Aikawa?”

“Don’t worry. I’m fine. Let’s go, Haruna.”

If Haruna was the cause, it was probably better not to go through the festival in a big group.

Well, going through the festival with just the two of us wouldn’t be so bad.

I could look for Eu and Sera after I finished my rounds with Haruna and go through the whole school again.

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1. Hakkaisan Junmai Daiginjo is a premium Japanese sake from Niigata Prefecture.