Chapter 7: Showdown

Thanks to that asshole, now I have even more to worry about.

I know I should just try my best to forget it, but... at this point, I don’t think I can keep up the charade any longer. No matter how desperately I wish these feelings didn’t exist, I know they’re there, buried deep in my chest.

Honestly, a piece of trash like me has no right to feel this way. I’m lucky I have any friends at all... and that’s why I don’t want to have to let them go.

If this gets out, I’m screwed. I have to keep it secret at any cost, or else I’ll never be able to show my face there again, and our little pentagon will fall apart.

And I can’t let that happen.

I don’t know if I can endure it, or survive it, or hide it, or protect it...

All I know is, I absolutely refuse to destroy it.

■□■□■

Three days had passed since Kiriyama returned to school—three blissfully uneventful days for Taichi and the rest of the CRC.

At least, as far as they knew.

The Liberation continued to strike, but none of its occurrences had any lingering complications. Perhaps their relief at resolving the tension in their friendships had had a positive effect on their mental state.

Now they just needed to get Inaba back.

Before they knew it, it was Friday—the day of the field trip.

It was a calm, sunny day. By the time Taichi arrived at school, a large chunk of the first year students had already gathered on the athletic field, all of them dressed in casual clothes for the hike. Admittedly, it felt strange to see everyone out of uniform at the one place they were obligated to wear one.

There was a palpable sense of excitement in the air—save for a few of the girls, who were complaining that it was “impossible to dress cute for a stupid hike.”

One particular group of students caught his eye, and he made a beeline for them.

Nagase Iori was wearing jeans and a hooded khaki jacket over a striped T-shirt. It embodied a natural, casual style without seeming to try too hard to create such a look, which gave it a certain mature appeal.

Kiriyama Yui was decked out in a frilly, plaid shirt dress and skinny jeans—an outfit clearly chosen with strenuous activity in mind without sacrificing feminine flair.

Inaba Himeko had turned up wearing a black sweater that emphasized her curves and a pair of capri pants that flattered her long legs—a simple, no-frills outfit that looked positively stunning on a slender build like hers. She looked like she’d walked out of a fashion magazine.

Lastly, the final member of the Yamaboshi High School Cultural Research Club, Yoshifumi Aoki, wore his favorite hoodie.

“Morning, guys!” Taichi called out. They smiled and greeted him in kind... save for Inaba, who simply glanced in his direction, stony-faced.

Though they were caught up in a hellish supernatural phenomenon, they pressed on regardless—something that spoke to their strength of character, considering they were all still wrestling with the fear of lashing out and causing a scene. Under these volatile circumstances, they were forced to maintain a slight distance between themselves and those outside of the club... but they chose to stick together. And together they could overcome any obstacle.

As for Inaba, on the other hand, she had grown increasingly chilly with the four of them, and at this point it was a little concerning. They’d told her to reach out if she ever needed their help, but as her problem wasn’t readily apparent, there was nothing more they could really do.

Hopefully she just needed a little more time.

■□■□■

Once everyone was present, they boarded the rental bus and set off.

When they arrived at the foot of the mountain, they stepped off of the bus, grabbed their stuff, and started their hour-long hike. That said, the incline itself was far from steep, and the students progressed up the trail without too much difficulty.

Not much of note happened during the hike, save for Nagase’s desire to be pampered(?) getting Liberated, resulting in her clinging to Taichi and pouting, “Uggghhh, I don’t wanna waaalk! I don’t wannaaa! Carry meee!”

Then Gotou Ryuuzen—their class advisor, a grown man who definitely wasn’t Liberated in any way—started whining, “Nnngh... Hiking with a hangover really sucks... Help me, Inaba-san...!”

To which she replied, “You knew we were having a field trip today! Now start walking, you sorry excuse for a teacher!” Evidently she was more of an adult than he was.

At last, they reached their final destination: a camping facility halfway up the mountain. From here, the plan was to split into their assigned groups and start making curry... but they discovered a slight problem, which the president of Class 1-C, Fujishima Maiko, relayed to them after speaking with the facility manager:

“Basically, half of the groups will get to use the newer outdoor cooking facilities, while the other half will be forced to use the older ones.”

Their chosen campsite was well-stocked with all manner of cooking tools and ingredients. Unfortunately, the facilities had begun to wear down with age, and thus they were now in the process of undergoing renovations. For financial reasons, however, they had yet to finish remodeling the whole site, and now half of the stoves and sinks were brand-new while the other half were practically falling apart. Normally they got around it by having the campers only use the newer equipment, but with the number of students present today, that was looking rather unfeasible.

Thus, each group was to be paired off at random to play a round of rock-paper-scissors. The winner would earn their group the privilege of using the fancy new equipment.

“Good luck, Taichi!”

“If you lose this, Yaegashi-kun, there will be consequences.”

“You mean he’ll have to be punished, right, Fujishima-san? Yaegashi, you’d better win!” Watase piled on.

With the support(?) of his fellow members, Taichi headed up to represent his group in a match.

“I’m telling you, I really suck at this game...”

“You’ll be fine, Taichi! You’ve already used up all your bad luck!” Nagase grinned. He could tell she was one hundred percent confident that he would win... and he couldn’t bear to see it.

They’d chosen their group representative by hosting their own round of rock-paper-scissors just prior. The theory was that if they sent the loser up, that person would theoretically have used up their bad luck and have only good luck remaining... and Taichi had lost three times in a row.

“Hey, Taichi... You had better win this for us.”

“If you want us to win, then you should go up inst—wait, huh?! Inaba?!”

“What, am I not allowed to talk to you?”

“Huh? N-No, it’s fine...”

It had been so long since she initiated a conversation with him. Was the school trip having the desired effect after all?

“I gotta say, you sounded pretty passionate just now,” he muttered quietly.

Inaba scowled. “Have you seen that ancient crap?” She pointed over at the aging sinks, which were full of dead leaves, likely from months of disuse. “How the hell do they expect us to use that shit? It’s unsanitary! We already have to cook outside as it is!” she growled, balling her hands into tight fists.

Oh, right. Germaphobe.

And so he proceeded to promptly lose the match.

It was obvious at a glance that the outworn stove and sink would need a thorough cleaning before they could be used, and since it was his fault they were stuck using it in the first place, Taichi volunteered to lead the cleaning efforts.

After bagging up all the trash, he headed to the trash disposal site. There, he found Inaba clucking her tongue loudly as she hurled her trash bag in with the rest.

“Look, uh... I’m really sorry,” he offered.

She clucked her tongue again. “It’s fine. I don’t care anymore. Why do you suck at rock-paper-scissors so bad, anyway? I saw Iori and Watase dragged you into a few more rounds ‘just as a test’ or whatever, and you still lost every time? Do you have the world’s worst luck or what?”

Trust me, I wish I knew.

“Come to think of it, my morning horoscope said I’d have a really bad day today... Maybe that’s it...? Oh, whoa, there’s a cliff over here. That’s kinda not safe...”

Mere steps away from the trash disposal site, the ground dropped off sharply, plunging down the side of the mountain.

“Yikes. A fall from that height would probably kill you. Try not to get unlucky over there, alright?”

“Ha ha, very funny. It’s so obvious, I’d have to jump off on purpose.”

“Okay, whatever... What? What do you think you’re grinning at?”

“Oh, nothing... Just feels like a long time since we last talked, that’s all.”

“Wha...?! No, I... I just... Rrgh!” Inaba glared reproachfully back at him, blushing bright red.

“What? Come on, don’t be mad.”

“Fuck off!”

With that, Inaba stormed away.

At last, it was cooking time.

With Fujishima in charge, Taichi, Nagase, and Inaba were tasked with ingredient prep. Considering all that talk about “maintaining an atmosphere of love and peace within our class,” she’d probably singled them out for a reason.

And so the three of them washed and chopped the vegetables. Nagase did her best to try and keep a conversation going between them, but Inaba barely responded. She’d been in a sour mood ever since their last conversation... Maybe he should’ve kept his mouth shut.

Seeing Nagase trying so hard, however, Taichi decided to throw her a bone.

“Wow, Nagase, you’re pretty talented,” he remarked as he observed her impeccable knifework.

“I guess I’m decent. I’m always cooking stuff at home.”

“That’s neat... Hmm... You could use more practice though, huh, Inaba?”

Inaba slammed her knife down hard against the cutting board.

Crap... Got a little too honest...

“Taichi!” Nagase shot him a withering look.

But just as Inaba began to shake with rage—her almond-shaped eyes suddenly flew open.

Oh god, is she Liberated? Please tell me she’s not Liberated while she’s holding that knife! That would be really not ideal!

He braced himself to take action. Worst case scenario, he’d be forced to physically stop her.

Inaba leaned in sharply. “You think this is the best I can do?! Well, think again! You haven’t seen anything yet!”

Judging from her sudden overreaction, it was safe to say she was definitely Liberated... but what had set her off? Was she overly sensitive about her lack of skill?

Then, for some reason, she turned on Nagase. “And you, Iori! Don’t get so full of yourself just because Taichi gave you one measly compliment!”

“Wh-What are you talking about?!”

“Enough talk! It’s on! Let’s find out who can chop their cucumbers the fastest! I’m gonna trounce you! And once I beat her, Taichi, you better change your tune about me! Alright, go!” Without waiting for them to agree, Inaba began to slice cucumbers like a woman crazed.

About then, Fujishima stepped away from the pot of rice and walked over to them. “I see you’re all getting along swimmingly over here! Seems I was right to put you all in the same group.”

What part of this looks like “getting along” to you? Taichi retorted silently.

Inaba was about one-third of the way through her cucumbers when she suddenly fell perfectly still. She was still holding her knife, but it was clear the Liberation had faded.

“...I’m gonna go cool down for a minute,” she muttered, her face beet-red.

“O-Okay,” Taichi and Nagase said in unison.

The prep work continued for some time afterwards... but Inaba still had yet to return. Concerned, Taichi decided to go looking for her.

He weaved his way between the outdoor cooking stations, each bubbling with rowdy chatter.

“We gotta peel the carrots!”

“No we don’t! They’re better unpeeled!”

“Turn the heat down!”

“Uh, guys?! It’s burning!”

Though some students complained about how “annoying” and “lame” the event was, they all seemed to be having a good time regardless.

“Where are you, Inaba...?”

Just then, two figures caught his eye: Kiriyama and Aoki, who looked like they were having fun with the rest of Class 1-A. As he watched, Aoki waved Kiriyama over. Puzzled, Kiriyama headed over to him, and he stooped down with his hand cupped at his mouth in a secretive gesture. Tucking her hair behind her ear, Kiriyama leaned in to listen.

No awkwardness, no hesitation—just two friends sharing a moment together.

Aoki leaned in close and whispered something to her. When he pulled away, Kiriyama looked at him, and they both burst out laughing.

Moments like these, you’d never guess that Kiriyama had a phobia of men. She wasn’t treating Aoki any differently than any other close friend.

Taichi contemplated asking them if they’d seen Inaba around, but ultimately decided he didn’t want to interrupt.

After wandering around the entire campsite with no luck whatsoever, he gave up and returned to his group’s station—to find that Inaba had returned ahead of him.

Wish someone would have told me, he thought.

“I’m sorry! I tried to call you, but my phone’s out of service up here,” Nagase explained. Meanwhile, Inaba said nothing; instead, she glared at him accusingly.

“Slacking off, Yaegashi-kun? You’ll be eating the burnt parts of the rice, then. And I’m talking the really burnt stuff. The rest of us will be splitting whatever’s salvageable.”

Great. Now Fujishima was mad at him and he was being punished for their group’s failures.

As the other groups were putting the finishing touches on their curry, Taichi’s group still hadn’t quite settled down to eat.

“Fujishima-saaan... Can we please eat now...?” Nagase whined, exhausted with hunger.

“Not yet. Just wait.”

As it turned out, Fujishima was weirdly particular about things when it came to curry. According to her, her custom blend of spices required a specific amount of boiling time. As far as Taichi was concerned, though, no school activity warranted this level of effort.

“Fujishima-saaan... Hurry uppp...!” Nagase was clearly at her limits.

“Just a little longer... Nearly done now... I’m adding the final ingredient as we speak...” Or so she claimed, anyway; she didn’t seem to be doing much of anything beyond watching the clock.

Inundated with the world’s most appetizing smell, waiting was akin to torture.

Inaba hadn’t spoken up, but it was obvious she was pissed.

“......There! It’s ready!”

At last, Fujishima had given the all-clear. With their hunger now at unbearable levels, they each took turns serving themselves at the speed of light. Then, finally, it was time to dig in.

“Mmmm!” they moaned in unison.

“They say hunger is the best spice, but I beg to differ. No, the best spice is love!”

Setting aside Fujishima’s usual nonsense, the curry was absolutely godlike.

■□■□■

And so they enjoyed their meal under the clear blue sky, the four of them chatting away while one Inaba Himeko listened in silence. Every time the conversation shifted in her direction, she responded noncommittally and took tiny bites of her food.

Once she finished eating, she rose to her feet. The next step was to take her dirty dishes to the sink. Surprisingly, their curry had actually turned out pretty decent—no, downright tasty.

She was in the middle of washing her plate when Iori walked up next to her. “That curry was pretty good, huh, Inaban?”

“Yeah.”

She hoped it sounded convincing.

She’d been forced to interact with them on multiple occasions over the course of this trip. There had been some close calls, but thankfully she managed to endure it and recover.

Iori smiled sweetly—a contagious sort of smile.

How she wished she could be happy alongside the rest of them.

Then, before she knew it, Taichi was on her other side. “Inaba, are you bleeding?!”

“Huh?” Startled, she looked down at her hand, unsure where he meant.

“Right here! See?”

Taichi grabbed her hand and turned it. Sure enough, there was a hangnail on her right index finger, and it was bleeding slightly. She hadn’t even noticed.

“Oh...”

“What do you mean, ‘oh’?! Come on!” Taichi turned on the faucet and plunged her hand under the stream.

“Stop! I can do it myself, stupid!” She hastily jerked her hand away.

“Okay, well, you’d better! Don’t let it get infected!”

Then Taichi wandered away, waved over by Watase.

Haah. He’s such a mother.

She stared down at her index finger. The hangnail must have happened a while ago, because the blood had already congealed.

Her hand should have been chilly from the water, and yet it burned strangely hot—so hot she almost worried it might make the sink boil over.

Her chest ached.

[...***...]

Gently, she pressed her finger to her lips. They were both searing hot, far beyond her normal body temperature.

Her whole body was boiling, and her chest hurt so bad, she was ready to lose it.

She gave her finger one last parting nibble, then reluctantly pulled her hand away from her lips—

“Hey, Inaban? Just wondering, but...”

Her heart leapt into her throat so hard, she thought she might cough it up entirely.

Flinching, she turned in the direction of the voice. There stood Iori, eyes wide as saucers.

Her heart began to thump in her chest. She couldn’t breathe. A series of questions flickered through her mind one after another; how long had Iori been standing there? What had she seen?

She knew she barely counted as a girl to most people, but nevertheless, she still had a keen sense of female intuition. And right now, that intuition was telling her that these questions were all pointless. Truly, pathetically pointless.

Then Iori began to speak once more.

“Do you have feelings for—”

She knows.

All the evidence was right there, provided Iori knew where to look—the chief example being the very first documented instance of Liberation.

Inaba had told them she’d only made a move on Taichi because he was the only one there at the time.

But what if that wasn’t necessarily the truth?

They’d made it so far together, but now Iori was about to say his name. And the moment she did, everything they’d built would come crashing down.

Why?

Stop!

Please don’t!

Don’t say it!

I don’t want to ruin everything!

Their club was the one place she called home. It meant more to her than anything, and she wanted to protect it, even if she wasn’t worthy of sharing a space with the others.

Don’t take it away from me!

Please don’t let it be over... I don’t want it to end!

If it ends, I don’t know what I might do...

Please, please, please, please—

And so Inaba Himeko bolted from the spot.

She headed deep into the mountains, off the trail, ducking between the tall, slender trees. The ground was papered in a layer of dead leaves, but thankfully it didn’t impact her speed too badly.

She could hear someone shouting after her, but she ignored it and kept running, trampling the vegetation underfoot, dodging any obstacles with the shortest possible detour—anything to get away from there even a single second faster.

Someone was chasing after her, but she didn’t look back. Instead, she kept her gaze fixed firmly ahead of her.

How could she have been so goddamn careless? It made her sick to her stomach. Had she been Liberated? She seemed to recall hearing a [voice]... but maybe she’d simply imagined it.

She was so stupid for doing that. Stupid for even wanting to do it. She’d told herself a dozen times that she needed to be careful... Had she let her guard down? Or was she just weaker than she thought she was?

Those feelings were nothing more than the lingering effects of a fleeting fever dream.

She was supposed to have her priorities straight, after all.

Her breathing escalated. Her throat was dry. She wanted to puke. Her stride grew more desperate, and she stumbled a few times—but she kept running.

Why?

Was it mere chance that she’d managed to keep it hidden the past few days? Or had the Liberation simply made it impossible to disguise her intentions?

Was «Heartseed» going to take away the one place she felt she belonged? Would she lose the thing she loved most of all?

Was this to be the last time a group of good people considered her a friend, even if only briefly? Would a piece of trash like her ever get another chance in her lifetime?

No. Almost certainly not. A monster like her was better off spending the rest of her days hiding out in her room with the lights off.

They were out of her league.

She always knew this façade would fall apart eventually... She just thought she would get to have a bit more time.

For as long as she could remember, she’d been holding out hope that she could stay with them... as long as she stayed the strong, smart, responsible Inaba Himeko they all knew.

She never imagined it would end like this. But now the dam had burst.

Being with them was what mattered to her most, and it was far more than she deserved. So why did she want more? She was so stupid. Hadn’t she known better than to get too greedy?

She’d tried her hardest just to survive the Liberation without getting too close, without screwing things up, without anyone finding out. Now that she was overly aware of her feelings, they were growing stronger by the minute—but she’d told herself that didn’t matter as long as she could just survive until the phenomenon went away.

But now that was gone. Why? Why, why, why, why, why?

What if there was no coming back from this?

For now, Inaba let her legs carry her away from her worries—to a world where she was all alone.

■□■□■

Run. Run. Run. Run. Run.

Maybe if she could just escape to someplace far, far away from here... Maybe then she could pretend it all never happened.

Sadly, that wasn’t actually possible. And now she was forced to face reality.

Her lungs hurt. Her legs burned. At last, she fell to her knees in the middle of a small forest glade, surrounded on all sides by tall trees. For a moment it felt like she was the only person left in the world—but that fantasy was quickly and unceremoniously shattered.

“Inaban... Inaban... Inaban...!”

She could hear someone gasping her name through ragged breaths.

With her poor physical endurance, she’d always known she’d never be able to outrun Iori.

Still, she didn’t turn to look. Instead she stared at the ground and tried to catch her breath. Her mind reeled.

What do I do? What’s about to happen? What do I say to her? Has she figured it out? Can I still bullshit my way through an excuse? What are my options? What are my prospects? Good? Bad?

It all blurred together to create a formless, useless haze.

Sweat dripped from every pore, evaporating away her excess body heat. Somehow she was both warm and cold at the same time.

All of her senses were now a jumbled mess that her brain struggled to process.

But time ticked on regardless. Gradually, her heartbeat slowed.

Then a shaky, watery voice broke the silence.

“Inaban... Why...? Please, just... help me understand... Do you... have feelings for Taichi too?”

Stop! Don’t ask me that! I don’t want to hear it!

And yet, as much as she wanted to plug her ears, her body was frozen in place.

There was no going back now.

After a moment of silence, she heard footsteps approaching. Then a hand on her shoulder forcibly turned her to the side. Through her blurred vision she could make out Iori’s face, wet with tears.

The next moment, Iori’s eyes widened. What was so startling about her appearance, she didn’t know, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to find out. It likely wasn’t a pretty sight.

“Why...?” Iori took a few steps back, then collapsed on the spot. “I just don’t understand... You were always... trying to get me and Taichi together... the whole time...” She pressed a hand to her forehead like she wasn’t sure how to react. “I mean... I always figured you liked Taichi... as a friend, anyway... Was it more than that...?”

Inaba’s sight warped as she bit back a sob.

“But then... why did you try so hard to get me and Taichi together...? Did you decide to let me have him or what...?”

Inaba shook her head. There was never any anguished sacrifice. She’d wanted to get the two of them together from the very start.

“If you wanted to let me have him... then... why do you look so miserable?”

Evidently it was showing on her face.

Yes, her every waking moment was nothing but abject misery.

All at once, Iori jumped to her feet. “Inaba Himeko! Explain yourself RIGHT NOW!” Her expression had transformed into one of pure rage. Fury danced in her eyes like flames. This anger was far too abrupt—oh, of course. The Liberation must have kicked in.

But that didn’t matter. She was still Nagase Iori either way.

“Explain! Explain! Explain it to me!”

Their whole world—the one thing she wanted to protect—was crumbling apart. She could feel it.

“If you don’t tell me right now, then our friendship is OVER!”

Please don’t! Please, please, please, please, please! Anything but that!

She couldn’t take it anymore.

“I just... I had to... or else we’d all stop being friends...” As she spoke, she realized for the first time that she was crying. Tears were streaming down her face.

“Why?! Why would we stop being friends?!” Iori demanded.

Sobbing, Inaba forced the words out.

“Because... in any given group of people... once things get all complicated with romance or whatever... there’s just always fights! Friendships end over this stuff!”

She didn’t know if it was actually the case. After all, she’d never fallen in love before. Never had any close friendships. Never trusted anyone on this earth.

Until now, she’d spent her entire life alone.

“Aoki likes Yui... and Yui doesn’t seem to mind... and you were looking for someone who could be there for you... and Taichi’s naturally inclined to fill that role... so I thought... if I helped you and Taichi get together... it would just... balance everything out...”

That way they could all stay together. That way the club could remain intact. Being with them meant the world to her.

“What? Balance everything out? That’s... That’s so stupid! I thought you of all people were smarter than that!” Iori screamed at the top of her lungs.

Confronted with Iori’s harsh sentiment, Inaba felt something inside her snap. All at once, she was flooded with emotion—everything she’d kept hidden away—and for once, she didn’t try to hold it back.

“All my life, I was always alone! Always! Then I made it to high school and finally found people I could call my friends... and I just... I just didn’t want to lose that! And I didn’t know what I was supposed to do!”

She’d spent her whole childhood being lonely. Then, for the first time in her life, she discovered what it felt like to not be lonely anymore... and that made the thought of going back all the more terrifying.

For a moment, Iori froze, staring at Inaba’s face and blinking. Her expression softened for a moment—then her eyes narrowed once more. “Your life story isn’t the problem! If you’re feeling lonely, then tell us! If you’re that worried about our friendships all falling apart, then just tell us! Not everyone can read between the lines like you, so if you want the rest of us idiots to understand you, then you have to use your words! I don’t care if it’s awkward or scary—just TELL US!”

How could she possibly admit it out loud? How could she let herself be that vulnerable? She needed to be strong... or else the others wouldn’t need her anymore, and she’d lose her place among them.

“Why would you do something so stupid without talking to anyone?!”

“Well, what did you want me to do, then?!”

“Nothing! You don’t have to do anything!” Iori screamed, her hair disheveled.

“What? Yes I do! Otherwise I’m just useless! I’m just unlovable trash!”

“You’re not trash! Don’t talk about yourself like that!”

“But it’s the truth! I’m not a good person like the rest of you!”

“Then explain to me why I care about you!”

For a moment, Inaba forgot to breathe. She could hear Iori panting heavily.

“I love you so much, Inaban! I’ll keep saying it until you believe me! And I’m not the only one! Everyone else loves you, too!”

Then... I’m not unlovable after all? Unless—

“You just love my strong, competent outer persona. The real me is way too weak and pathetic.”

“I love every pathetic version of you! ...No, that’s not right... You’re a better person than you think you are, Inaban! ...No, that’s not it either...” Iori shook her head, and Inaba could practically feel the other girl’s emotions raining down on her. “There’s no such thing as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ people. It’s not that simple, Inaban! I mean, what’s so different between you and me?! Nothing! We’re no different from each other! Please just believe me, okay?! If I’m such a ‘good person’ to you, then take my word for it, just this once!”

Iori was so insistent on the idea that the two of them were equals. It wasn’t just for show, either; no, it was clear she believed it from the bottom of her heart. After all, she was Liberated.

Maybe...

“There’s nothing to be afraid of, Inaban! You don’t have to try so hard. I’ll always be there for you! ...No, that makes it sound like I’m the one doing you a favor... Whatever! I’ll always want to be your friend, no matter what! Please, just let me!”

Maybe it’s high time I believed in her for once.

“I... I always hoped someone would say that to me someday...” As she spoke, fresh tears streamed down her face.

Maybe it was safe to trust her friends and be herself. Maybe they would still love this weak, pathetic side of her. Maybe she could still belong with them, even at her very worst.

At last, the possibility felt real to her.

“...Thank you...” Deep down, she had longed to hear those three words from someone, and now she felt nothing but overwhelming gratitude. This moment was all she needed. She couldn’t possibly ask for anything more. “Thank you for everything you said, Iori. It’s honestly more than I deserve. But at this point... it’s too late. I’ll just get in the way of your relationship with Taichi... and I don’t want to wreck the club, so... I can’t go back there.”

She realized her tears had dried.

“How come?” Iori asked, her eyes piercing straight through Inaba. Was she still Liberated?

Inaba shivered, then spoke. “Well... it’ll just be too awkward, won’t it?”

“Why would you think that?” Her tone was cold and aggressive. Then she continued. “Actually, it just hit me. Earlier you said that if me, Taichi, Aoki, and Yui all get together, then it’ll ‘balance everything out.’ But wouldn’t it still balance out if it was you and Taichi instead? Why does it have to be me?”

“Well... it doesn’t have to be you, but... I always thought you two would be good together, right from the start. You’re just so compatible... You’re like the perfect couple. A-And it’s not like I had any special feelings for Taichi at the time... N-Not to say I do now, but—”

“Why are you still lying to yourself about that?!” Iori screamed at the top of her lungs. Her voice was so shrill, Inaba wondered if it might make her throat bleed.

“I... I’m not lying to myself...”

“Even if you did go about it the dumbest way possible... you were just trying to keep our friendships intact, right? That was your top priority, right?”

Precisely.

“But you still fell in love with Taichi—hard enough that you were worried it would ruin everything, right?! And you couldn’t stop yourself, right?! Otherwise you never would have freaked out like this, right?!”

She felt a lump in her throat. All these feelings... this splitting ache in her chest...

“So now you’re in a situation where you want two different things, but pursuing one of them means sacrificing the other. So what would Inaba Himeko do?!”

Pressured, Inaba answered on reflex. “Well... obviously I’d choose the more important one...”

“No you wouldn’t! This is Inaba Himeko we’re talking about! You’d try to get them both anyway!” By this point, Iori had screamed herself hoarse. Inaba could only imagine the pain she must’ve felt... and yet she screamed on regardless, all for her friend’s sake. “You know you could do it! The Inaban I know could totally steal her friend’s crush if she wanted! And she could smooth things over so it wouldn’t end up awkward between them later! All she has to do is put her mind to it! No matter how the cards are stacked against her, she never gives up! Never admits defeat! That’s the Inaba Himeko I know! Arrogant, patronizing, manipulative, and fully committed—that’s Inaba Himeko!”

So, what sort of person was Inaba? What sort of person did she want to be?

“Either way...” Iori paused and took a deep breath, suggesting this was the final stretch. “Our friendship would never fall apart over some stupid boy!” She exhaled slowly, caught her breath, and smiled. “At least, I trust that it won’t. Please, Inaban, forget your anxiety and just come back to the clubroom. It’s no big deal. You’ll see.”

She could feel her tears welling up again, but she blinked them back desperately. Biting her lip, she sniffed and looked up, then wiped the dampness from her eyes.

She was hopelessly weak, and she’d been desperate to spare her own dignity. So she hid it—until one day she just couldn’t anymore.

She had no confidence in herself. She thought she was trash.

But here was someone who professed to like her—someone who gave her encouragement even though she herself stood nothing to gain from it.

She had underestimated Nagase Iori’s strength. Now she could only hope that someday she’d be as strong as her. Then maybe she could live up to the expectations she’d set with her outer persona... That was the version of Inaba Himeko she wanted to see.

And so she spurred herself into action. Her legs threatened to give out, but she pushed herself to her feet unassisted. She stood up straight, planted her feet firmly apart, put her hands on her hips, and opened her mouth to speak.

This was for Iori... but it was for herself, too.

“Alright. Fine! But you’ll regret it, you hear me? I’m a goddamn... f-force to be reckoned with! If you want me to fight you so badly, then I’ll just have to... crush you beyond recognition! Beyond a sh-shadow of a doubt!”

Her throat hitched a few times, but she pushed on to the end, looking directly into Iori’s eyes and ignoring the renewed urge to cry.

This was the girl she called a friend... a sister-in-arms... a romantic rival.

Iori looked straight back at her, and when Inaba finished her little declaration, she smiled softly—the sort of smile that could make anyone’s heart flutter.

Then it transformed into a cheeky grin.

“Just so you know, Inaban, I have zero intentions of going easy on you. I mean, do you really think you stand a chance against me?”

This made her smile, too—for what felt like the first time in years.

“Too bad your looks are all you have. There are countless ways to outshine girls like you,” she shot back playfully.

“Sick burn!” Iori laughed.

“I will say, however... On the off chance you beat me... I’ll put everything I have into making sure things don’t get awkward for the club. For Taichi’s sake, anyway.”

She could do it. She had the power. She’d make it happen.

You want greedy? I’ll show you greedy. I’ll have my cake and eat it too.

“Likewise,” Iori replied.

At last, the anxiety had faded. She’d been completely on edge ever since the Liberation struck, and now she was half-ready to pass out.

“You know, Iori... you can be pretty intense.”

Surprisingly intense, actually. She couldn’t begin to tell where the Liberation started and ended.

This comment seemed to catch Iori off-guard. She paused to think for a moment, then whispered, “Do you think that’s... the real me?”

“Hmm... Not sure. But I do think you meant every word of that... from the bottom of your heart.”

Iori smiled and nodded. “Wait... At what point did I get Liberated, anyhow? And when did it fizzle out?”

Evidently even she wasn’t all-knowing. She was naturally strong, but at the same time, she was a perpetual wild card in any given situation.

I hope someday I can make it up to her.

But then Iori’s expression faded entirely, to an inhuman degree—precisely the sort of blank canvas Inaba was used to seeing on Gotou Ryuuzen’s face.

“Listen... Don’t take this the wrong way, okay...?” mumbled the entity now wearing Nagase Iori’s face.

«Heartseed».

“Give me a fucking break. What do you want with me now, you son of a bitch?”

She hadn’t witnessed it herself, but she’d heard from Taichi all about how «Heartseed» had possessed Iori’s body only to summarily plunge her into the river. It nearly killed her doing that.

“Well... I wasn’t planning on doing this, believe me... How do I put this... I figured it would be more fun... I mean, prudent... if I let you know as soon as possible...”

“The fuck are you talking about?”

She felt like she was about to pop a blood vessel.

“Oh, you know... I was just hoping to spice things up a little, really... Wait... That doesn’t explain anything, does it...? Well, alright... Basically, the gist of it is... Yaegashi Taichi-san has fallen. And it wasn’t me this time.”

Her mind went blank.

“Honest... I haven’t done a single thing... Anyway, this... what did you call him... ‘goddamn martyr’ sure is fascinating... Personally, I try to maintain a degree of moderation in these things, but... as you might expect, Yaegashi-san wasn’t exactly planning for it—”

Inaba took off running full-speed back the way she’d come.

For a moment, she questioned whether it was safe to leave Iori behind, but ultimately decided she would be fine.

Loath as she was to actually believe a word «Heartseed» said, it genuinely didn’t appear to hold any ill will or malice. Its only interest appeared to be in creating “interesting” situations and watching them play out. And if it had taken such a liking to the five of them, then surely it wouldn’t want them to die.

But Taichi was a different story. Taichi was a goddamn bona fide idiot. He’d do anything for the sake of helping someone else... and that meant there was no telling what he might do under the effects of the Liberation.

The word “fallen” brought to mind one specific location—the cliff.

Then she remembered a comment she’d made to him at some point in the past.

—What if you actually die this time?

She couldn’t imagine what could have led to him falling, but knowing him, he’d invent some insane reasoning...

So Inaba kept running.

Her lungs hurt. Her chest hurt. Her throat hurt. Her legs hurt. Hell, even her elbows hurt from landing on them earlier.

At some point she found herself wondering why she was running so fast, but even then she didn’t slow down. She couldn’t tell how much distance she’d covered, or if she was even running in the right direction, and the rational part of her brain was screaming at her, telling her the most efficient thing to do would be to stop for a moment to get her bearings—and yet she still kept running. Despite the pain, she staggered onward, fighting for every step.

“Agony” had a pretty ring to it, but in reality, she probably looked like a haggard mess. If anyone saw her like this, stumbling full-speed through the forest, she imagined they’d laugh at how ridiculous she looked.

She was so pathetically uncool right now. If only she could just stop trying so hard. She didn’t want people to think her stupid or judge her for being weak. She wanted to maintain her tough girl rep... But she pushed all these feelings aside.

Worrying about keeping up appearances? That was the last thing she needed to be doing right now. So what if they laughed at her? Right now she needed to let this impulse carry her forward. To thine own self be true... if only to honor the friend who gave her that final push.

She kept going, and the trees thinned. There was sunlight up ahead. She could hear voices.

There, she came to a stop.

Her heavy breathing grated on her ears. Her heart was pounding ridiculously fast. What was the matter with her? Even she wasn’t sure. Her feet were practically rooted to the spot.

Was she scared? Yeah, she was. What if she’d run herself ragged for nothing? The thought was frightening. What if they rejected her? She was terrified of anyone seeing her like this. It would likely change their perceptions of her forever. The image she’d built up would come crumbling down, and everyone would discover the frail little girl behind the curtain. She’s just a nobody, they’d think. We don’t need her around.

Besides, it wasn’t like she could do much to help Taichi in the first place—

Oh, good. More excuses.

She was so good at bullshitting her way out of everything, wasn’t she? She always managed to run away and avoid getting too invested. If she got hurt, she just told herself they weren’t seeing the real her anyway, so it didn’t count.

But maintaining that charade meant sacrificing everything the real her wanted... and starting now, she’d decided to be true to herself. She wanted to have more confidence, if only for the sake of those who claimed to like her.

And so Inaba Himeko ran on ahead.

Her knees shook with exhaustion, but she pressed forward regardless.

The light was getting brighter. The voices were getting louder.

She bit her lip and exhaled hard through her nose.

Then, at last, she made it back to the campsite.

She shot a quick glance around. Most of the students had long since finished cleaning up after lunch and were now entertaining themselves with various recreational activities. A few people noticed her arrival and pointed in her direction.

But that didn’t matter now.

There, in the corner of her vision, she spotted Yaegashi Taichi sitting collapsed on a bench—