Chapter 2: B___

The next day, the members of the CRC gathered in Rec Hall Room 401 in order to hold the meeting that should have happened the day before. Naturally, Yaegashi Taichi was among them. The five of them had already taken their seats at the table. Today Aoki Yoshifumi and Kiriyama Yui seemed to be a little tense, but otherwise quiet. Personally, Taichi had made it a point not to bring up what had happened yesterday, as it seemed like a sore subject.

An awkward silence hung in the air. But this seemed to matter little to vice president Inaba Himeko, who started the meeting without further ado.

“Now then, let’s begin. First order of business—”

“Oh crap! I forgot I left something in the classroom!” Nagase Iori blurted out, bringing the meeting right back to a screeching halt.

“Rrgh... I wanna get this shit done today! Don’t kill my momentum here!” Inaba snapped.

“Poor Inaban. Better luck next time!”

“You do realize it’s YOUR fault, right?!”

“Yeah, yeah. Anyway, Inaban! Is it cool if I go grab my stuff?” Nagase asked innocently, a sweet smile on her face. Her ponytail almost seemed to be bouncing of its own accord, though obviously that wasn’t actually the case.

“Can’t it wait...? Ugh, fine. Go get it...”

“Yes, sir!”

“Do I look like a ‘sir’ to you...? Aaand she’s not listening.”

Nagase dashed out of the clubroom before Inaba could even finish her sentence.

“Hehe! She sure knows how to get your goat,” Kiriyama snickered. It was the first time she’d smiled that day.

“I wouldn’t go that far... She’s definitely a handful, though,” Inaba muttered with a sigh.

With that, the tension in the room seemed to fade. Once the heavy mood had cleared, Aoki started telling his usual stupid jokes, with Kiriyama and Taichi calling him out on his awful punchlines. Bit by bit, the clubroom was regaining its usual cheer.

“Problem is, I can never tell if she’s doing it on purpose,” Taichi heard Inaba mumble to herself.

Just as she finished, everything went dark.

The next thing he knew, the world had tilted sideways.

No, wait. He was the one tilted sideways. Specifically, his head. That made more sense.

He quickly realized he was bent over a desk, his cheek pressed to the cool plastic.

He pushed himself upright and looked around.

This was... not the clubroom.

He was standing in an empty classroom.

Outside, he could faintly hear the crack of a baseball bat mixed with some athletic club’s jogging chant.

A wave of dizziness rushed over him, and he quickly grabbed the desk for support.

Something felt very off.

Was it just the dizziness? No, it had to be more than that.

Just moments prior, he’d been up on the fourth floor of the Rec Hall, in the CRC clubroom. That much was fact. Hell, he’d been in the middle of a conversation with Inaba. But now, mysteriously, he was standing in a classroom.

How?

Taichi looked around the room, trying to get his bearings. The positions of the desks, the messages on the bulletin board, the writing on the chalkboard, the little bookshelf in the corner—all of it was keenly familiar. This was Class 1-C, Taichi’s classroom. And there was no possible way he could have walked all the way here in the span of a few measly seconds.

Goosebumps pricked up over his arms as a shudder ran down his spine. Had he teleported here? Or had he somehow blacked out during the time it took him to get here? Or... had he simply dreamed that he’d been in the clubroom, when in fact he was here in the classroom, sleeping the entire time?

Or maybe... none of the above?

“What the heck is... Huh?!”

Startled, Taichi clapped a hand over his mouth.

“No way...” His hand descended down past his chin.

His neck was smooth, like a girl’s. He couldn’t even feel the bulge of his Adam’s apple.

For a moment, he attempted to convince himself he’d somehow misheard the voice that had come out of his mouth.

No dice.

He knew what he’d heard.

So why was his voice suddenly soft and sweet, like a girl’s?

Was he dreaming?

Sadly, no. He was definitely awake.

No dream on Earth could possibly be this realistic.

Calm down. Calm down. Calm down. Calm down. Calm down.

He silently willed himself not to let his imagination get carried away with him... but it was far too late. In the back of his mind, he recalled everything Aoki had said yesterday.

His only option was... to check.

With that thought, Taichi took a deep breath, exhaled, and slowly lowered his gaze.

Pleated cloth wrapped around his waist, hanging to his knees. Specifically, it was an item worn almost exclusively by women: a skirt.

Below the skirt was a several-centimeter gap of bare leg, followed by a pair of black knee-high socks.

Taichi groaned softly, in a voice that was definitely not his own—though, for the moment, technically it was.

Next he checked his upper body, tugging on his clothing with both hands. It was without a doubt the Yamaboshi High school uniform—the girl’s uniform.

His head began to spin.

Nothing. Nothing made sense. Nothing about this made any sense.

Except... a certain glaring possibility was already present in the back of his mind.

But something else—something he’d steadily built up over the course of his entire life—was trying desperately to bury it in a haze.

Unfortunately, the cruel reality of the situation was staring Taichi in the face.

Something hovered at the edge of his vision—something that the average guy, or at least Yaegashi Taichi, was certainly not meant to possess.

His chest was... inflated.

And not just a little.

No, this was no minor swelling. This was far beyond the scope of what the average male could expect to achieve.

This was, almost undoubtedly, a pair of (usually) lady-exclusive... b___.

At this point, he would be forced to accept what he already knew to be true... assuming they were real, of course.

Swallowing hard, Taichi willed himself not to panic.

Then, steeling his resolve, he raised both hands... placed them on each of the twin mounds... and squeezed.

Once... twice... three times... then four...

They were pillowy soft, yet had a firm elasticity, puffing out slightly through the gaps in his fingers. It was unlike anything he had ever felt before.

He was in unknown territory. In all sixteen years of his life, he had never touched the real deal, and yet somehow he knew. They were, without a shadow of a doubt, the real, genuine article. A bona-fide pair of... b___. With each squeeze, he felt a strange, almost ticklish sensation spread through his body. Evidently a girl’s b___ were not just there for decoration—

But before Taichi could finish that thought, the classroom door slid open, and someone walked in.

Their eyes met.

Taichi was already having a hell of a time struggling to process how he’d ended up in these circumstances. So when this new complication rolled in, he failed to react in time.

As it happened, the person who walked in was none other than Fujishima Maiko, president of Class 1-C, wearing her trademark glasses, her dark hair tied back neatly, and now frozen in mid-stride. They stared at each other wordlessly for a few seconds before Fujishima finally broke the silence.

“I, er... I saw the windows had been left open in here, so I came in to close them. The weather report said it might rain tonight, after all... So tell me, [Nagase-san]... what exactly are you doing?”

Fujishima had called him [Nagase]. On the inside, he was definitely still Yaegashi Taichi... but on the outside, he was apparently [Nagase Iori].

“I ask because, to me, it looks an awful lot like you’re playing with your own breasts.”

At this, Taichi realized he still had his hands on “his” chest. Hastily, he relinquished his grip. His brain was lagging under the strain of too much, too fast... but he knew he was in trouble. Fujishima eyed him for a while longer, as if sizing him up. Her eyes glittered behind the lenses of her glasses. Taichi wanted to bolt, but found himself rooted to the spot.

A heavy silence descended between them.

Then, at last, Fujishima spoke once more.

“Want some help with that?”

“......What?”

Whatever it was he’d been expecting, it certainly wasn’t that.

“It’s better to have someone else do it for you... if you know what I mean.”

“N-No thanks. I think I’ll pass.”

While he didn’t actually know what she meant by that, he wasn’t sure he wanted to find out.

“No need to be shy, now. I’m pretty good with my hands.” Fujishima took a step forward.

“Uh... Fujishima...?”

She was acting... different. Normally she was the very model of a straight-A student, but now... The look on her face was so uncharacteristically seductive, Taichi was at a total loss.

Meanwhile, Fujishima was getting closer... and he was starting to panic. He got the distinct sense that his virginity was in danger... or was it technically Nagase’s?

He didn’t have time to figure it out.

“L-Let’s both just calm down, Fujishima! I’m sure we can talk this whole thing out!”

“I agree. We can let our bodies do the talking.”

“B-Bodies?! S-Slow down for a sec!”

What the hell is happening right now?! Can’t you at least give me five minutes to figure out what’s going on?!

Help came when the classroom door whipped open, and someone came dashing in.

“TAICHIIIIII!” There stood [Yaegashi Taichi]... or rather, someone piloting his body.

Taichi’s brain was still a jumbled mess, but he forced himself to think as quickly and coherently as possible.

Fujishima had called him [Nagase]. Ignoring the scientific impossibility of it all, if he were to simply accept it as fact that he was somehow piloting [Nagase’s body], then... did that mean the person in [his body] was Nagase?

“Y-[Yaegashi-kun]?!” Fujishima looked up in surprise at the sudden intruder.

“Fujishima-san! Sorry to interrupt, but it’s an emergency! I need to borrow Taichi—I mean, me—I mean, [Nagase Iori]! Come on, let’s go!” [Taichi] walked right up to [Nagase] (the real Taichi), grabbed [her] by the arm, and turned to leave.

But before they could, Fujishima seized [her] other arm. “Wh-What’s your issue, [Yaegashi-kun]?! We’re busy, if you don’t mind!”

“Yeah, it was definitely about to get busy in here, if you get what I’m saying... but I really need to go! Please let me go, Fujishima!” [Nagase] (Taichi) yelled.

“See? Listen to Taichi—I mean, [Nagase]!” said [Taichi] (Nagase).

“What’s gotten into the two of you?! If you need to borrow Nagase-san so badly, then I’d appreciate an explanation first!” Fujishima insisted.

“Nrgh... You leave me no choice... Take THIS!”

With that, [Taichi] (Nagase) lunged at Fujishima.

“Coochie coochie coo!”

“No! Ahaha! STOP! Not my armpits! AAAH! HAHA! G-Get your dirty paws off me, [Yaegashi-kun]! Hahahaha! S-Stop...!”

“H-Hey! Nagase! Er, you are Nagase, right?! Whatever! Right now you’re [me], so try not to get me in too much trouble, alright?!”

Class 1-C was the perfect picture of pandemonium.

“Is this some kind of joke?” Inaba stared at them coldly.

After arriving back at the clubroom, [Taichi] and [Nagase] quickly began to try and piece together what was going on.

At first there was chaos—peering into mirrors and promptly screaming at their reflections—but the two of them had since calmed down. According to Nagase, she was in the classroom when it happened. All of a sudden she blacked out, and the next thing she knew, she was sitting in the clubroom in the middle of a conversation with Inaba and the others.

And according to the others, who had witnessed the whole thing, [Taichi] had suddenly collapsed forward in his chair—almost like he’d passed out—then immediately straightened back up again. Once in Taichi’s body, Nagase had panicked for a moment. Then, as soon as she remembered Aoki’s story from yesterday, she bolted all the way back to the classroom to look for [herself]... and now here they were.

“I can’t believe Taichi and I swapped bodies... Feels more like our bodies swapped us, to be honest!” [Taichi] (Nagase) laughed cheerfully. She was unbelievably chill about the whole thing.

“Uh... Am I going blind, or is that an actual legit grin on Taichi’s face? I’ve only ever seen him make like a half-smile, half-grimace!” Kiriyama blinked.

“I know, right? The dude’s not even that bad-looking. Maybe if he always smiled like that he’d be more popular with girls,” Aoki replied.

“Is that what my normal smile looks like to everyone else? A half-smile, half-grimace? I didn’t realize it was that bad...”

“WHO CARES?! Don’t change the goddamn subject!” Inaba slammed her fist down on the table. “Gah...!”

“Bet that hurt, didn’t it?”

“Shut the fuck UUUP!” Inaba lashed out at [Nagase] (Taichi) with a throat thrust—and spun on her heel at the last second, whipping her hand away before the blow could land. She froze, her arms now raised high over her head like a ballerina, her face twitching from either embarrassment or rage.

“You look like you’re having fun,” [Taichi] (Nagase) snickered.

“I get it! Taichi dropped one of his classic snarky one-liners, and you were gonna smack him for it like usual, but then you remembered he’s technically Iori-chan right now, so you stopped yourself. Makes sense,” Aoki commented.

“And now here you are, mansplaining the situation to her. Sucks to be Inaba right now,” Kiriyama added.

The commentary was brutal.

Her expression still twitching, Inaba lowered her arms and took a deep breath, as if willing herself to calm down.

“Man, you’re kind of hilarious today,” [Nagase] (Taichi) remarked as the thought crossed his mind.

Inaba whipped her head around and fixed him with a vicious glare. “Rest assured, I won’t forget this, Tai...” She cut herself short, her eyes wide with shock.

[Taichi] (Nagase) smirked like she’d seen it coming. “Inaban, you totally just looked at [Nagase Iori] and said ‘Taichi,’ didn’t you?” Nagase Iori was clearly the only member of the club who could go toe-to-toe with Inaba and live to tell the tale.

“Nggh...!” Inaba grimaced. “It’s your fault for... putting on this stupid little act in the first place...!”

“Do you really think Taichi could pull off a Nagase Iori impression this believable?” [Taichi] (Nagase) pressed. Her body and voice were all Taichi’s, but her mannerisms and speech were undeniably Nagase’s.

“Inaba, I know this is hard to believe. Hell, even I’m having trouble accepting it. But it’s the truth. I’m the real Taichi, and the [Yaegashi Taichi] you see here is actually Nagase.” Admittedly it felt a little weird making that declaration in a high-pitched girly voice.

Inaba bit her thumbnail in frustration, then changed tack. “Yui! Aoki! What do you two think about this? Yesterday you were both saying—well, okay, Aoki was saying you swapped bodies yesterday, right?”

“Oh yeah, Taichi and Iori-chan have definitely swapped bodies. Takes one to know one, y’know? You agree with me, right, Yui?”

“Ugh... I guess I have to, don’t I...”

“But you flat-out denied it yesterday!” Inaba argued.

“Look, I’m not happy about this either, okay?!” Kiriyama slammed both hands on the desk and jumped to her feet, her long chestnut locks flying in all directions.

“Wait, so you admit we switched bodies the other night?” Aoki shot her a daft grin, and she scowled.

“Yeah, I admit it...” she muttered in a small voice. “I mean, it can’t’ve just been a dream. Especially now that it’s happening to Iori and Taichi, too.”

“Give me a break. Are you guys hearing yourselves right now? Body-swapping? There’s no way a B-movie plot like that could happen in real life!”

Taichi didn’t blame Inaba for being skeptical. The average person would never believe that it was humanly possible to switch bodies with someone else... not without some serious convincing, anyway. But no matter how insane it sounds at first, once someone experiences it for themselves, it starts to seem like the most obvious thing in the world. It seems impossible on paper, but once you cross the threshold, well, it’s just another part of your life at that point.

Inaba looked around the room at the others. Each of them nodded.

“I still think you people came around a little too quickly... Pretty sure somebody ought to be panicking over this, at least!”

“Well, I mean... Once it happens, it all just kinda clicks, y’know? Like, duh, of course!”

“Nagase, that doesn’t really explain anything,” [Nagase] (Taichi) retorted.

“Ugh, this is giving me a headache... But at this rate we’re just gonna keep going around in circles... Alright, let me ask you one more time. You swear this isn’t some asinine joke? Do you absolutely swear, on your lives, that the two of you have swapped bodies?”

“I’ll say it a hundred times. I may look like [Nagase] on the outside, but on the inside, I’m one-hundred percent Yaegashi Taichi.”

“Which means you know things only the real Taichi would know, right? And that Taichi knows things only Iori would know, I take it?”

It was obvious how Inaba was planning to have them prove their identities.

“Good call. That’s probably the simplest way to prove we are who we say we are. So, ask me anything and I’ll answer it... though it might be tricky to think of something that you and I both know, but Nagase doesn’t...”

“Oh, we won’t need to worry about that,” Inaba replied confidently, dismissing his concerns with a wave of her hand. “Now then, I’m going to ask you something, and I want you to answer it on the spot. No pausing to think.”

Inaba leaned forward and drew her face close to his. She was far more seductive than a girl his age had any right to be. Swallowing his panic, [Nagase] (Taichi) firmly returned her gaze.

“Bring it on.”

“I want an answer within milliseconds, got it?”

“I got it, I got it.”

“Alright, here we go.” Inaba took a deep breath and blurted out, “What’s the title of the last porno you borrowed from Aoki?!”

“Big-Breasted High School Gi—HEY! Don’t ask me that! And... and how would you even know the answer to that in the first place?!” Taichi babbled, embarrassed at the words that had nearly slipped out of his mouth at full volume.

“Whoa... It’s not every day we get to see Taichi lose his cool! Wait... Now that I think about it, how does Inabacchan know about our little deal?!” Aoki protested.

“That’s not important right now! What’s important is that we can use Aoki to confirm your answer. Now then, Taichi. Spill it.”

Her expression was dead serious, but Taichi could see a hint of glee in her eyes.

He glanced around at Kiriyama and [Taichi] (Nagase). Kiriyama was eyeing him suspiciously, her face bright red.

And then there was Nagase, who was shooting him a reproachful look, made even worse by the fact that she was using his own face to do it. “Big-Breasted, huh?” she parroted dryly.

“L-Listen, Inaba-san... Is there any chance you could let me just whisper it into Aoki’s ear?”

After a moment of silence, Inaba jerked her head in Aoki’s direction.

Relieved, [Nagase] (Taichi) decided to get it over with before she changed her mind. He rushed over to Aoki and whispered the title into his ear.

“Well, Aoki?”

“We got ourselves a winner, Commander Inaba! Plus I got to hear [Iori-chan] talk dirty! Totally worth it!”

“Wait, what the? I feel like I got the short end of the stick in this deal... Maybe I should bill him for it later...” [Taichi] (Nagase) mumbled to herself. Evidently she had some interesting opinions on Aoki’s stupid little comment.

“Alright then. Now that we know both of these dipshits like ’em big, it’s time to find out whether the person in [Taichi’s body] is indeed Iori.”

“Y-You don’t think she’s using this as an opportunity to get revenge on us for teasing her earlier, do you?” [Nagase] (Taichi) whimpered fearfully.

“I wouldn’t wanna get on her bad side, that’s for sure...” Clearly even Kiriyama was feeling a little intimidated.

Inaba stood up, walked over to where [Taichi] (Nagase) sat, and whispered something in [his] ear. Instantly, Nagase began to choke.

“Holy crap... I-Inaban, are you serious?!”

“Dead serious,” Inaba declared.

“Y-You... You didn’t have to tell me...!”

[Taichi] (Nagase) clapped [his] hands over [his] eyes and slid down in her seat. Whatever Inaba said, it must have been something completely nuts.

“Wow... I guess we’re all growing up...” she sniffled.

What on earth could have elicited a reaction like that? Taichi was dying to know.

Stone-faced, Inaba collapsed back into her seat and stared at the ceiling. “People swapping bodies in real life... Alright, fine, I’ll believe you.”

At this, the other four gasped and cheered at their hard-earned victory.

“I asked myself, what’s more likely? That Taichi could learn to wear his emotions on his sleeve, or that body-swapping is real? And in the end, I chose the latter.”

“I don’t even know how to respond to that... And why are the rest of you all nodding like it makes total sense?!” Taichi had half a mind to find out exactly what the others really thought of him.

“So, okay. Let’s say we’ve determined that Iori and Taichi have switched bodies... What now?”

Inaba had brought up a very important question.

“Heheh! What now, indeed!” [Taichi] (Nagase) chuckled.

“I notice you’re having fun playing the role of the comic relief today,” Inaba commented dryly.

“Let’s hear more about what happened when Aoki and Kiriyama switched bodies the other night. You guys went back to normal at some point, right?” [Nagase] (Taichi) asked, his optimism tempered at best.

“Hmm, let’s see... The other night, around 3 AM or so? I randomly woke up, and my bed felt all different, so I looked around and noticed I was in a room I didn’t recognize. So I got a little freaked out and started searchin’ the whole room top to bottom. Then I saw my reflection in the mirror and was like, wait, isn’t that [Yui]? So then I got even more freaked out, but right as I was about to tear my hair out, I suddenly found myself back in my own bed. The end! It was pretty much the same for you, right, Yui?”

“Yeah, for the most part... In my case, I thought it was like all just a bad dream, so the second I saw my reflection in the mirror I crawled straight back into bed. It was so crazy... I didn’t even care that the bed wasn’t mine... Oh, and when I found myself in my room again... and in [my own body] again... I noticed the place was a total mess.” Kiriyama shot Aoki a dirty look.

“I... I’m really sorry!” Aoki apologized profusely.

“Hmmm... So how long would you say it lasted, all told?” [Taichi] (Nagase) asked Aoki.

“Less than an hour for sure... I wanna say thirty, forty minutes?”

“That’s it? This is one bizarre phenomenon... Well, I guess it’s bizarre regardless, but still...” Inaba grimaced.

“I think maybe it wears off over time. Or maybe something else trig—”

Before he could finish his sentence, Taichi’s consciousness went black, almost as if someone had pulled the plug on his brain.

“—Hey! You alright?!”

The loud voice rattled around in his head. Wincing, Taichi opened his eyes.

All at once, his surroundings returned exactly as they were before.

No, wait. Something was different.

Inaba had been sitting diagonally across from him moments ago, but now she was directly in front of him. Aoki and Kiriyama had changed positions, too. But most importantly, someone in Nagase’s body was now looking at him. This could only mean one thing.

“We’re back to normal!” Nagase and Taichi exclaimed in unison, both beaming brightly.

“Gimme a break...” Inaba mumbled, sliding lower in her seat.

By the end of the day, Vice President Inaba ordered the members of the CRC to keep the body-swapping situation to themselves for now, and then they all went home.