Chapter 1

It was spring, and within the Dancing Doll Inn’s dining hall were two girls blooming in conversation.

“Whew, udon sure is tasty, huh, Mai!”

“It certainly is, Michiru.”

One of the girls was Michiru, a Succubus working as an apprentice nun at the Beddhist church. The other was Maiodore Tsia, Niku’s betrothed. Udon had been added to the dining hall’s menu after Keima’s return from the Demon Realm. It was his souvenir for the townsfolk, and at some point it had become a staple on the menu. The noodles used wheat different from what could be farmed in Tsia, but who knew where he was getting it from. Perhaps he had found a source to import from during his stay. He surely had connections. A student from Tsia had come to stay over a year ago, after all.

Incidentally, Maiodore had privately received another souvenir from Niku. It was just a tapestry without much practical use, but she had happily clasped it to her chest all the same.

“Gosh, I wish I got a souvenir from the Demon Realm, too,” Michiru said.

“Ahaha. We are engaged, after all. Did the town chief not give a souvenir to the church? Surely the Divine Pajamas are quite an incredible souvenir from a religious perspective.”

“That’s not what I mean. I’m talking more, like... as friends!”

“Aaah. I see.”

Incidentally, Rokuko had diligently prepared souvenirs for all of the town’s higher-ups, like Gozou. She had Demon Realm wine and stuff. Suilla accepted the wine, but naturally none of it trickled down to the underage Michiru.

“I asked ’im about it. Apparently they, like, fought someone super strong in the Demon Realm? It’s kinda hard to think of anyone stronger than the princess who came over, though.”

“Lady Aidy, you mean? I never thought that I would associate with a foreign noble before my own debutante ball. Though it is still up in the air whether she will remember my name and face at all.”

“I don’t really like her, y’know. She always blabbers about dueling the second she opens her mouth. To our High Priestess, even! Who knows what’s going on in her head. Would’ve been better if she’d been all about marriage instead of dueling. ’Cause marriage is our job at the church. The princess said dueling is a church’s job, too, but not Beddhist churches, that’s for sure.”

“M-Marriage, you say? Ahahaha, one day Lady Kuro... ahem, Kuro and I will get married, too, I hope.”

“And if that happens, I’ll hold the ceremony for you! Heck, I’ll even follow you to bed, too!” Michiru grinned, and Maiodore returned the smile with an uncomfortable one of her own. After all, a married couple’s bed was a holy place, and going there meant assisting with the baby-making process. Only the most coddled and ignorant of noble girls would need that, and as Maiodore had received a proper education, that did not include her.

Visitors arrived as they talked. Naturally, this dining hall was mainly for adventurers. It only made sense that there would be visitors, but...

“Hm, this hall is more well kept than I expected. Albeit small nonetheless.”

“Prince. Are you perhaps comparing it to the academy’s dining hall? Do recall that this town is smaller than the academy in the first place.”

“True, true.”

The visitors were clearly men of high status. There were three of them, and they were all handsome like a trio of adventurers from a storybook. And, well, one of them was being called a prince, so...

“You there. Where do I deliver the meal ticket?”

“Yes, sir, right over here! Ah, C-Rank meals, I see!” Hanna, the completely green Silky maid, accepted the meal tickets and guided them to their seats. Things weren’t very busy at the moment, so she even set the table for them.

“Hmm. Mai, that was pretty weird, right?” Michiru asked.

“I believe that is the prince of Daide. His arrival certainly is unusual, but why do you ask? Do you know him?”

As a noble, Maiodore knew the appearance of Daide’s prince as a matter of course. He may have been from another country, but portraits of royalty were freely available no matter where you went. (As for portraits of the imperial princess, Maiodore was personally familiar with three entirely different-looking ones, perhaps to stave off assassins.)

Michiru shook her head. “No, no, that’s not what I meant. I mean, wasn’t it weird that they knew about meal tickets and stuff?”

“Why would it be?”

“I mean, most people who come here for the first time end up super confused.”

“Oh, I see.”

In most commoner restaurants they didn’t bother to go through all the effort of distributing meal tickets, and in higher-class restaurants they wouldn’t want to disturb valuable customers with the tedious process. Thus, throughout all of the empire, only the Dancing Doll Inn actually used the meal ticket system. It was that rare.

“Perhaps they were taught at the counter?” Maiodore suggested.

“At the very least, he was familiar with meal tickets. He acted like someone who was coming here for the first time but knew all about meal tickets!”

“Michiru, you’re oddly observant, aren’t you?”

“Heh heh! Behold, the observational skills of Michiru the grand detective!”

“Detective?”

“Apparently that’s the name for adventurers who focus on solving mysteries. Usually murder mysteries! You should read Herlock Sholmes, it’s super good! You can borrow it at the church!”

“Ah, genre fiction, then.”

As of late, the Beddhist High Priestess had been using her spare time to translate foreign texts and donate them to the church. Herlock Sholmes was probably one of those.

Putting that aside, the prince of Daide and his entourage swiftly received their C-Rank meals and began eating. Maiodore watched, and... indeed, they did not seem to be particularly surprised. That was odd.

The C-Rank meal was a stew filled with beef. But usually, it was downright bizarre for a backwater country town to give out beef so freely. It would be somewhat understandable if the dungeon produced Minotaurs and they served Minotaur meat, but the closest dungeon where Minotaurs appeared was the [Flame Caverns]. Only first-rate adventurers like Keima could casually hunt in a place like that.

“Sigh... I wonder how Summer is doing. I wish I’d brought her,” the prince said.

“She is certainly doing fine. I’ve seen her skills with my own eyes.”

“Yep, me too. She’ll knock the crap outta most dudes that come at her.”

“I trust you two, but still... Ah, Summer, how I miss you.”

The three of them chatted about nothing while taking no note whatsoever of all the beef on the table. Maiodore considered the possibility that the prince was just ignorant of how the world worked, despite coming all this way to a foreign country’s town.

“Perhaps we should tell Keima?” Maiodore asked.

“Bleeeh, I’m lazy. Should the receptionist be handling that?”

“The current receptionist is Neruneh, no? I find it hard to imagine she would make reports like that.”

Neruneh gave the strong impression of someone just going with the flow and living in her own world. No doubt she cared absolutely nothing about the nobility, and subsequently, no doubt she knew nothing about a foreign prince. Neruneh treated even Wataru the Hero as a normal person, which honestly made one question whether she could even distinguish what people looked like. She probably didn’t remember someone’s face until she met them many times over. Really, Maiodore wasn’t confident Neruneh knew her or Michiru’s faces.

“Can’t we just tell Niku or something...?”

“I suppose so. In which case, I will inform Lady Kuro of the situation. Ahaha, I wonder if she’ll praise me...”

“Sure would be nice if she did!”

And so Maiodore left.

＊ ＊ ＊

I have no idea what’s going on, but apparently Daide’s prince is here.

Dolce gave me a report on it (since she had casually swapped places with Misha after Aidy left), and then Maiodore came and gave a similar report. I thanked her for sending word, then blinked in confusion at a foreign prince being here.

“A prince, huh...? I wonder why he’s not staying in the grand suite, then.”

I decided to observe the so-called prince’s entourage from the Master Room.

First was Harkes, the Prince of Daide. Then there were his two retainers, Crusch and Kenho. And finally, there was his shadow bodyguard (whom Dolce said she ignored because they weren’t an assassin, though they were pretty good—she would’ve beaten them easily anyway). Said shadow bodyguard was hiding their identity from the prince’s group, but upon being spoken to by Dolce they paled, revealed their identity, and separated from the prince temporarily to have the discussion. Dolce apparently had high praise for their quick and correct decision making.

Anyway, the four of them went pretty much straight to the dungeon.

I checked their DP per day to see how strong they were. The prince was 202, while the retainers were each around 250. The shadow, however, was 532. Which put them... around the level of an average Hero. The others were still competent, though. They easily blew past the Goblins and traps, then hunted the labyrinth Golems with ease. Prince Harkes and Kenho used swords, while Crusch launched stone stakes with magic for support. The shadow... was just staying on guard, observing their surroundings. They had no openings.

And upon defeating Iron Golems, they put their corpses into {Storage}... Interesting, they all had {Storage}. Pretty rough foes for a dungeon to face.

“Not bad. They’re pretty good.”

“Uh-huh. They’re saying they just want to check the dungeon out today, but what do you think they’re really here for?” Rokuko asked, having appeared beside me at some point. Her face was really close to mine. I felt like the, what, physical distance between us had shrunk dramatically since Aidy left. Her cheek was close to rubbing against mine.

“So, Keima. What are we going to do?”

“In what context?”

“I mean, won’t they just conquer the dungeon pretty easily at this rate? They seem pretty top tier.”

“Aah... Well, yeah, we can show them up to the place with the Dummy Core. Just like we did with Wataru.”

“That’s true.”

This was a good opportunity to go through the dungeon’s current layout.

First was the town of Goren. We earned loads of DP from the people there while getting extra from visitors sleeping in the inn. There was also the tunnel through Tsia Mountain that connected us to Pavella. But putting that aside...

Floor 1 was the entrance area and was a light jab with Goblins and traps.

Floors 2 and 3 were the labyrinth area. Iron Golems spawned in them, and the Magic Blade testing rooms were there as well.

Floor 4 was the former puzzle area with the Inn of Greed, which made it essentially a rest spot.

“Most adventurers who come to our dungeon stop here,” Rokuko said.

“Yeah, since hunting Iron Golems provides some steady income.”

From there the difficulty rose, and the areas became targeted at advanced adventurers.

Floor 5 was the spiral stairway. The walls would push out to knock someone down the center, and at times the floors would collapse to make one fall down to the lower floor.

Floor 6 was the storeroom area. There were rooms for Golem Blades, experimental Golems, etc. The first Haniwa Golem was wandering it as well, making it a simple but genuinely dangerous area.

“Some people actually do come here, though not super often.”

“Yeah, they always load up on Golem Blades before taking them out... Which was the idea, but still.”

Then came Floor 7, which had three branches.

Floor 7-1 was the grassy plains area. It was a peaceful rest spot that existed primarily for Rokuko’s pets to relax in the sun.

“This is a safe area, but basically no adventurers actually bother to go this far...” I said.

“Maybe we should make it a concert hall like Mikan’s, and host live shows for Succuma... Wow, I’m a genius! You in, Keima?”

“No.”

Floor 7-2 was Phenny’s Playground, a magma area. It led into the [Flame Caverns]. Igni sometimes dropped by to play with Elulu the Elf Ghost.

“This is where Phenny is growing up mostly by himself. There’s a few adventurers who pass through here to get to the [Flame Caverns],” Rokuko said.

“Wataru went through here first, if I remember correctly.”

“For better or worse, no adventurers have crossed paths with Igni yet.”

Floor 7-3 was the new puzzle area. It was the canonical path to the end. Aidy destroyed it, but I did my job and fixed it. Sigh.

“These puzzles are set to take super long,” Rokuko said.

“Yep. At the very least, it’ll take over a full day. It should buy plenty of time... though I feel like it’ll never work when it counts.”

Subsequently, Floor 7-3 led into the coliseum area, and then the Boss Room. I had reverted everything back to normal after messing it up for Aidy. Oh, and just for the record, in the coliseum there was an Iron Haniwa Golem to fight, and in the Boss Room was the Dragon Golem.

“It’s crazy how jamming traps into it lets the Dragon Golem breathe fire,” Rokuko said.

“It only works in the Boss Room, but that doesn’t matter much since bosses can’t leave the Boss Room anyway.”

“Too bad it doesn’t come even close to being as strong as a real Dragon.”

“...You know most Dragons will look weak if you compare them to the [Flame Cavern] family, right?”

That said, it would be fair to say the Dragon Golem was seeing exactly zero use. Not that I wanted people to reach and fight it.

Anyway, clearing Floor 7-3’s Boss Room finally got you to the Core room. However, the room contained only a Dummy Core. There was a secret room hidden within it: it was a trap that exploited one’s prejudice for thinking the Core room was always the final room. And the best part of the Dummy Core room was that it was a Boss Room as well, that boss being an Orichalcum Golem the size of a thumb. Rokuko’s idea.

On top of everything, said thumb-sized Orichalcum Golem was hidden behind a ceiling tile, making it extremely hard to find. And even if one did find it, managing to kill it would be even harder. Not to mention that killing it just opened the secret door—finding the door would be yet another journey.

“A mini Orichalcum Golem... A pretty evil idea, if I do say so myself!”

“A boss so tiny it’s impossible to find, and almost impossible to realize you’re even in a boss room...”

“We’re using the Boss Spawner that Father gave us to produce Orichalcum, right? How much did that end up producing, anyway?”

“One per month, if left completely alone. We have two of them, so we get two per month, but still, not much.”

I ended up shaving down the Orichalcum sword a bit further to make a third thumb-sized Orichalcum Golem. It would stand guard while the Boss Spawners were dedicated to recycling the other two. They had gone through several cycles already, and it felt incredible to see my stock of Orichalcum steadily go up.

Anyway, let’s presume someone actually did manage to kill the Orichalcum Golem and find the hidden door. They would find another room with a Core in it, which would surely be the real Dungeon Core... except actually, it was yet another Dummy Core. The real trap would be the satisfaction one felt after seeing through the secret passageway and defeating such a devilish boss.

And that sums up the entirety of the [Cave of Greed]... Wait, you want to know where the actual Dungeon Core is? The hidden room had yet another hidden passageway within it, and that led to the Final Area. It was filled with insanely lethal traps, with the Dungeon Core resting safely behind it all. Incidentally, only dungeon employees were allowed in, since it had stuff like the Suzuki Wall that we really wanted kept safe.

It was safe to say the Final Area was like an entirely different dungeon cut off from the [Cave of Greed]. One of the routes forward was at the bottom of a pitfall, for example, so invaders not in the know would almost certainly get stuck.

And yeah, there was one final trick. There was a hidden room above the ceiling of the tunnel through Tsia Mountain, which had a Dummy Core in it. The tunnel was filled with similar hidden rooms, so there were plenty of decoys to distract people. So basically, even if invaders got into the Final Area, we could flee through the Castling function while buying time. We had built this last resort over the past year in secret, so only Rokuko and I knew about it.

Incidentally, in terms of dungeon territory, Dragg on the other side of the mountain was actually included. It was developing pretty nicely, thanks to its town chief Cid Pavella, and the growing population meant more DP streaming in for us. Very nice.

Thus concluded the entirety of our dungeon by Tsia Mountain. The Dungeon Core (Rokuko’s true body) was protected behind multiple layers of tricks and traps. Even a somewhat skilled party of adventurers posed no threat to Rokuko’s safety whatsoever.

With the overview finished, Rokuko gave me a lovey-dovey smile. “Eheheh. Keima, I love you.”

“Y-Yeah? Where’s that coming from?”

“I mean, how hard it is to conquer our dungeon is proof of your love, right? There’s not a Core out there that wouldn’t be happy to be this thoroughly protected.”

Is that how it works...? I guess it makes sense.

“With this, I can feel safe even with a bunch of super strong people like Daide’s prince attacking me.”

“True. We can pretty much ignore them.”

...Or on second thought, maybe I should formally welcome him or something? Nah, if he’s here in secret I don’t want to go spilling his beans. He didn’t say anything to us, so we’re just going to treat him like a normal adventurer. Though things could get problematic if he dies here.

Rokuko and I lazily watched... er, observed... no, actually, there was no point dressing it up. We lazily watched the Daide group work their way through the dungeon. There was a chance we would have to step in, but what we were doing could hardly be called proper observation.

“Keima, want something to eat?”

“Sure. I could use some popcorn. Also, throw in some juice.”

We put the prince and his group on a large monitor and leaned back on giant cushions, like we were watching a movie. After all, our dungeon was iron tight, and even a decent party stood no chance of conquering it.

I ripped my way through the popcorn and washed it down with orange juice. Yep. Now that the dungeon’s safe and secure, watching adventurers go through it is just pure entertainment. You know, maybe it would be fun to make a dungeon where everything was recorded and shown to people on the outside. Not that I’ll bother making one like that myself.

“That popcorn stuff. Is there a melon roll-flavored version of it?” Rokuko asked.

“If there is, I’ve never seen it before.”

“Gimme some of yours, then.”

“Sure.”

I watched the dungeon attack show while sharing popcorn with Rokuko. Life was peaceful.

＊ ＊ ＊

The prince and his retinue were making solid progress through the dungeon. They once again began at the entrance and worked their way through the labyrinth. Goblins and Clay Golems posed no threat whatsoever to them. They blasted through the same areas they had yesterday. The prince withdrew a Magic Blade in the test room while talking about how surprised he was that it would be so easy to acquire one, only for the shadow to inform him it could not be brought out of the room. He slid it back into the stone bitterly.

This shadow guy’s a nice all-rounder, just like you’d expect from someone on the level of an average Hero. The other three, including the prince, are kind of just doing whatever they want. They’re not even gathering intel ahead of time like the shadow did.

The prince and his retinue alone likely would have been destroyed by the test room, but the shadow was there to help out when it counted. Though really, those three were acting so casually it was like they were visiting an amusement park for fun. I had to question whether their adventurer rank was actually high enough to enter the dungeon.

“And y’know, the mage in that group sure seems like a musclehead. Seems kind of weird for a magic user,” I said.

“Hm? Does magic have anything to do with intelligence?” Rokuko asked.

“Uh... I guess not.”

In this world, there wasn’t much of a connection between intelligence and using magic. Casting spells and the like didn’t actually require much thinking. Magic was basically a tool, like a bow and arrow. Even when compared to warriors, it was just a difference between hitting people with muscles and hitting people with mana. Magic was, ultimately, just one more convenient tool in one’s arsenal. One benefit was that you could use it anytime, anywhere as long as you had mana. Though one could say that knowing when to use all of one’s trump cards would require intelligence.

As we chatted, the prince’s retinue broke through the labyrinth area. They ignored the Inn of Greed and headed straight to the spiral staircase.

“There’s Magic Blades past this point! Let’s bust out all the stops for Summer!”

“Prince, there is little information about the dungeon past this point. Please do not take the lead.”

“Right, good point. I shall let Kenho be the vanguard, then.”

“You can count on me! I’ll show you the power of the next knight commander!”

“This is quite a sizable set of stairs... Falling down too many would hurt. Be careful, Kenho,” said Crusch the mage.

“I shall tie us together with rope, honorable Kenho,” said the shadow. They had contained the prince when he was about to burst into the spiral staircase unprepared, then tied themself to Kenho as a lifeline. Yeah, without this shadow, they would’ve been finished here. And in fact, without the lifeline, Kenho the muscle chad would have been pushed off the stairs or fallen down a floor and died multiple times. About five or six times, to be precise.

“So the walls push out, and the stairs collapse... On our next trip I will mark them as we go, for reference purposes,” said the shadow.

“Right. You’re so wise,” the prince said.

“Pro adventurers sure are something else,” Crusch said.

According to what they had told Dolce, the shadow was an assassin that served the Daide throne, but had contacted the prince’s retinue under the guise of being an adventurer to babysit... or, rather, protect them.

They cleared the spiral staircase in this way, and moved on to the storage area. It seemed their goal was to acquire Magic Blades; the best thing to do here was to let them get them and leave. Didn’t want them hurt in a way that left permanent aftereffects, after all. Though perhaps that would have been preferable if they had been staying in the grand suite.

Incidentally, while Misha stayed in the grand suite, Dolce was staying in the church. There was the guest room made for Aidy when she was here, but apparently the basement was chillier and more filled with the grudges of the malicious dead, which made for a more calming sleeping area for her. Yeah, I know. It was a church. With grudges of the malicious dead. Thanks to the jail in the basement for imprisoning thieves. Well, Dolce was eating the built-up grudges like they were snacks, so really it was a win-win for us.

When Dolce leaves, maybe I should have our elf ghost Elulu check out the place, too.

“So, what’s the plan, Keima?” Rokuko asked.

“I’ll fiddle with it so they don’t encounter the Haniwa Golem, and let them find the Magic Blades.”

I lazily sent Golems their way while guiding them in the general direction of the Magic Blades. And so, the prince’s retinue accomplished the astounding feat of acquiring Magic Blades (Golem Blades) on only their second day of attacking the dungeon!

“Prince, these are the Magic Blades,” the shadow said.

“Oooh! We did it, Harkes! Let me have one!”

“Sure. There are more, so I grant that sword to you, Kenho. You did take vanguard when we were climbing down the stairs. Any complaints, Crusch? Djungaria?”

“None from me. I’m a ranged fighter,” Crusch said.

“I need only the payment we agreed on,” the shadow said, taking one of the Magic Blades off the wall and handing it to the prince. The prince then granted the blade to Kenho, who was apparently going to be the next knight commander of their country. Judging by their conversation, their goal was to get multiple Magic Blades, not just one. They would go hunt more if they didn’t have enough, probably.

“Keima, how many Magic Blades are you going to give these guys?”

“Uhhh... I’m guessing about five at most. One for each, then one as a bonus.”

Although the so-called Magic Blades were made from my {Create Golem} and didn’t cost us a single copper, flooding the market with them would still lower their market price. It was something I had to carefully think about and manage.

That said, it was fair to give a skilled party like this at least five of them. After all, their party DP per day rivaled Wataru’s.

Oh, but how high is Wataru’s DP nowadays? Now that I think about it, I haven’t actually seen it lately.

“Oooh! This is the third one!”

“You get one, too, Crusch! Here, have it!”

“Hah. I suppose I will take it.”

In the end, the prince’s retinue left after getting the five Magic Blades I’d planned out for them.

Alriiight, hopefully they just leave Goren entirely now. I doubt they can beat our boss, but I feel like killing a prince will cause more problems than it solves.

The prince’s retinue apparently took the next day off for rest. The three oddly sparkling chads hung around the inn, then entered the onsen. The shadow was absent, instead going to the Adventurer’s Guild to deliver the Iron Golem corpses.

Okay, time to gather some info on these troublemakers.

I opened the dungeon monitor while sitting on my bed and listened to what the prince’s retinue were talking about. What? I was illegally recording them in the bath? Sorry, you need evidence to sue, and they would never get any, since this was a dungeon. Also, the three chads were apparently used to bathing onsen style—so much so they naturally wrapped towels around their waists without bothering with the bathing clothes. The fact they looked straight out of a painting regardless was due to them having perfect facial and physical aesthetics. Lanky, muscular dudes were popular with the ladies, as far as I could tell.

“Whew. Pretty easy dungeon for us three,” the prince said with a laugh as he sank waist deep into the water. Yesterday’s adventure had instilled him with confidence.

“Prince, Kenho almost died four times.”

“Yeah? Well, I suppose that’s inevitable for a vanguard.”

“Yup, Crusch, Harkes. But that’s why we hired an adventurer, yeah? Thanks to them, I’m as alive as ever. In other words, it was nothing!”

“That is some slim logic. Though I suppose that kind of thinking is one of your strengths, Kenho.”

“Still, that adventurer... Djungaria, was it? I can’t tell if that skill level is normal for adventurers, or if they’re just especially skilled... Unfortunate that they refused my offer to hire them for good.”

And so the prince’s retinue chatted about a bunch of stuff that didn’t matter. I wanted them to talk about their objective or whether they’d be leaving already, but their lips seemed to be sealed.

“Oh, Keima. Doing some eavesdropping?”

“Do you have to put it like that? But yes.”

Rokuko entered my room like always. She was holding a volume of manga.

“Oh, don’t look, Rokuko. The video’s showing the boys’ bath.”

“Um, hello? This whole place is my dungeon. Naked humans mean nothing to me.”

“True, but...”

“Also, I want to help, Keima.”

“Alright, if I ever need to peep into the girls’ bath, I’ll come straight to you.” Not that the girls’ bath was relevant to this.

“Plus, this is kind of dumb. Why not go to the bath and just ask them directly? Just say, like, ‘How long are you guys gonna be here?’”

“Ehhh... I guess that would be faster?”

“Yes. It would. Bye bye. I’ll be reading manga on your bed.”

Apparently Rokuko’s determined to read manga in my room while I’m gone. C’mon, read in your own room. Not that I have anything to hide in here. I don’t have a single porn mag to my name.

Anyway, the prince’s retinue seemed like they were set for a long bath. Following Rokuko’s advice and slipping in to ask them seemed like a decent idea. I would probably want to use {Ultra Transformation} to hide my status as the town chief, though. That way, if they got suspicious, I could deny all involvement.

“What, you’re going with a disguise, Keima?”

“I mean, yeah. And {Ultra Transformation} is some good security to have, too.”

“Aaah... Well, okay. Bye bye. I’ll be reading manga here.”

“Uh, yeah, you just said that. Bye?”

Rokuko abruptly lost all motivation and started lazing around for some reason, so I left and changed into bath clothes before heading to the onsen while transformed. When I arrived, the retinue was splashing about and still talking about nothing.

“I’m telling you, Harkes, swordplay’s all about the muscle,” Kenho said.

“Nah, it’s all skill. Don’t you agree, Crusch?”

“Brains are important to figure out techniques, no? You should use your head more, Kenho.”

I had no idea what they were talking about, but I didn’t care at all, either. I went ahead and used {Purification} on myself, then went to—

“Hey! You! Don’t get in the bath with clothes on!” shouted the prince suddenly, pointing at me.

“Oh? Why not?” I asked, calmly radiating an aura of “Who do you think you are?” while replying like a normal townsperson.

The prince gave me a condescending look and sniffed, his brows furrowed. “What, you’ve never bathed before? You’re supposed to bathe in the nude. Strip.”

“What about those things around your waist?”

“Towels are a necessary evil, as otherwise our crotches would be exposed. Still, with {Purification} they don’t spoil the hot water,” he replied, crossing his arms and exuding confidence.

Alright. There were a lot of things to point out here. First, apparently the prince’s retinue knew about Japanese-style bathing rules. Towels themselves were commonplace even in the imperial capital (since there were magic tools that wove them), so it wasn’t strange they knew about them. However, towels being a necessary evil for bathing...? It was possible that Daide had just coincidentally developed a similar culture, but... if this was the influence of a certain someone (Leona), it would certainly be problematic.

Secondly, they apparently didn’t know about bath clothing. Hence the demand for me to strip. There might’ve been more cultural differences at work there, but he seemed pretty narrow-minded. Is that how a prince should be acting? You’re gonna be dealing with foreign diplomacy later, my man.

“Got it? Now strip. It’s common sense to bathe naked.”

“Actually, these are called bathing clothes, and they’re just like the cloth wrapped around your waist.”

“Say what? You’re gonna wash your body with those clothes?”

“No, they’re for covering it.”

“I’m telling you, it’s common sense to bathe naked. To think you don’t even know that... Look, there’s towels, use those instead. Alright? You with me?” The prince sighed with exasperation. What an annoying guy.

That may be how it is in Daide, but Daide’s not the whole world. Everyone in the empire just uses {Purification} to clean themselves, and towels are used for wiping one’s body down. Dunno how it is in Daide, though.

“Hey, you. You’re speaking to Daide’s prince, y’know? Showing a little obedience would be for your own sake, if you know what I’m saying,” Kenho said.

“Indeed. The prince has made his will known. Now strip,” Crusch added.

C’mon, lackeys. Don’t use his authority to make me strip. You wanna see my naked body that much? (i.e. the naked body of the dude I transformed into.)

“Well, well, what’s all this then? I don’t know about any princes, but forcing your country’s culture on a foreigner doesn’t seem good to me. This is the empire, remember? We have our own customs here,” I said. For example, nudity wasn’t really much of a thing in public. It didn’t bother me, but I was roleplaying a normal person here.

“Hrm, you have a point...” the prince said.

“I see, I didn’t think of that,” Crusch said.

“Huh, so that’s how you guys live here? Cool.”

Whoa, what? They sure backed off a lot faster than I thought they would.

“So, does that mean we’re actually the ones being rude here? Be honest,” the prince said. Now they were asking whether they were the troublemakers. Holy crap, talk about straightforward.

“Nah, you can wear whatever you want. It’s just, I don’t know about nobles, but most commoners aren’t used to getting naked in public. These bathing clothes are for them.”

“I see. So we’re fine, then? We’re not ashamed of our bodies, so yeah.” The retinue made a bunch of poses. It annoyed me how he was basically correct.

“Yup. As long as you used {Purification} on them, it’s no problem at all.”

“Mm. Good to know. You have my thanks,” the prince said, shooting me a sparkling smile and then directing his palm my way as if saluting me. There was a pause, then he blinked. “Hey. Do commoners express their thanks in a different way? Or is this another foreign culture thing?”

“Aaah, that’s what that meant? Is this a bit, like, royalty doesn’t bow their heads?” I went ahead and bowed my own head, to return his thanks.

“Huh, we never even thought about that!” Kenho exclaimed.

“Kenho and I do lower our heads, prince. I believe this man speaks the truth.”

“Oho! You’ve got good observation skills, then. And the courage to talk back to royalty. I like it. How about you come work for me?”

Welp, looks like I’ve earned the prince’s favor for some reason. Not that I’m going to actually work for him or anything.

Although a bit off about how the prince’s retinue were speaking and acting, I succeeded in engaging them in conversation. They must have really liked me, as the prince invited me to join them tomorrow like this: “Alright, we’re going to the dungeon tomorrow, and you’re coming with! We’ll split the Magic Blades with you!”

I mean, I did turn them down since there was nothing in it for me, but they just took that as humility and said they liked me even more. What the heck was up with this prince? Was his brain made of pig iron or something?

“Er, well, just out of curiosity, what are you even doing here, Prince Harkes?” I asked, deciding to just throw caution to the wind and ask directly.

“Right. This is top secret, but...” he began. I listened quietly, not pointing out that something top secret should not be shared with a self-proclaimed adventurer you’ve never met before. “The truth is, I want prestige.”

“Prestige?”

“Right. There’s a girl I love back in my home country. But she doesn’t have much status, understand? I’m out questing for prestige, so I can earn permission for us to get married.”

If you get too much prestige, won’t that just widen the gap between you, and make the marriage harder?

“If I can prove myself, they’ll at least let me be with the woman I love. Our country is one of freedom. We can’t let ourselves get swallowed up by the empire like Tsia was,” the prince said, burning with resolve.

Ah, I see where he’s coming from, then. I feel like he’s being a bit optimistic here, but well, they’ll probably let her be a concubine or something no matter how low her status is. I’ve heard plenty of cases like that.

“Summer’s a great girl. There was a time when I thought only of becoming king and cared nothing for my subjects, but she woke me up with a slap!”

“Wouldn’t that be, like... sedition?”

“She gave me advice without fear of being executed! She’s worthy of trust!”

Love is blind, I suppose. Must be a case of it being hard to make the right decision when it involves someone you love.

“Harkes, let me brag, too. One time I had a real rough falling out with my old man, and she was there to hold my hand!”

“Heh. It certainly did take courage for her to hold the hand of such a muscly delinquent. She’s a perfect fit to be a queen. Oh, and I had an incident with her as well, when she displayed startling intelligence...”

“Wait, wait! Summer’s my girl. Let me brag more! First, the day I met her...”

I was forced to listen all about the girl in question.

At this rate, we’re all going to get overheated. I need to change the subject.

“Still, do you think you’ll find enough prestige here to make a difference?”

“Yes. Conquering a dungeon would be the fastest route to prestige, no? We will expose the deepest secrets of this dungeon and secure iron imports or something. After all, my country has no mines and relies on imports for almost all its iron. That leaves plenty of room for prestige to be earned, no?”

“This dungeon’s already been conquered, though.”

“It has...?” the prince asked.

“You didn’t know, Harkes? Even I knew that!”

“Y-You knew that, too, Kenho? Huh...”

Whoa, hold on, don’t tell me you didn’t even know an adventurer had reported to the Guild that they had conquered it up to the Dungeon Core... You gotta do better research. This is just bad planning; are you sure you’re fit to be a king? Apparently this muscle-headed future knight commander heard it from the shadow. Man, shadows seem pretty useful. Maybe I should raise one of those myself.

.........

Actually, wait, on second thought, basically everyone in my group is already like that. Rokuko’s surprisingly tough, Niku is basically a Venus flytrap that hides her immense power beneath an innocent loli form, Rei pretends to be a High Priestess but is actually a dungeon manager that doesn’t hold back when it comes to torture... And well, there’s Kinue, Neruneh, the Succubi, and the dungeon monsters, too. Everybody’s got a hidden side to them. I—

Wait. No. No... It can’t be. Is... Is Ichika the most normal out of all of us? Ichika, the girl who got enslaved over gambling and food costs...? Alright, I might need to get some more normal humans on our side. Maybe I should go buy slaves again.

“Well, I suppose there’s still the Iron Golems. Right. How about we send those we hunt back home? A genius idea, don’t you think, Crusch? Go ahead, tell me your opinion as my future prime minister.”

“It is critically flawed. Given the distance from here to Daide, the shipping costs will be nothing to scoff at. There are taxes as well, so it is questionable if we will be able to send one Golem’s worth for every two Golems hunted.”

“And that will never earn us supremacy,” the prince mused. If they had to pay the empire an equivalent amount of iron as they were sending home, they would basically be strengthening the empire rather than themselves (albeit only marginally).

“I believe it would be unwise to try to mine from deposits in other countries. We can disguise the issue on an individual level with our {Storage}, but on a larger scale...”

Man oh man. This may be a bit much for a town chief like me to say, but Daide sure is a small country... It’s surrounded by the empire, the Demon Realm, and then the Holy Kingdom on the other side of a mountain range, so most everyone just treats it kind of like a buffer zone. The royalty has a rough time of it, I hear. So, well... My sympathies?

“You sure don’t have it easy, Prince Harkes.”

“You understand me?! Alright, you’re one of us now! You’ll have the warmest of welcomes!”

“Sorry, but I’m not interested in serving the throne. Look elsewhere.” Why does the prince like me so much?

“Er, well, securing talent’s an important job for me. I’m saying this only because I trust you, but our country’s kind of in a state of chaos right now... I want any skilled man I can get.”

“State of chaos, you say? Ah, I do recall the Suzuki the Hero incident...”

“That is part of it, but I can say no more. Apologies.” The prince fell silent.

What could be worse than a Hero killing the previous king? Well, I guess he could just mention that part since everyone already knows about it?

From there, I retreated from the bath before I overheated or told the prince’s retinue my name. I got what I had come for, learning that they were here to earn prestige and secure talent, and I didn’t have any other business with them. It was a plus that I learned they were approaching this with no plan, and were just winging it, more or less.

And so, I settled on ignoring them. I undid {Ultra Transformation} to lose the prince’s retinue entirely, then returned to my room and resumed sleeping like nothing had happened. Zzz.

In the end, the prince’s retinue gave up on conquering the dungeon since it wouldn’t give them prestige and instead spent three days hunting Iron Golems to fill their {Storage} to the brim before leaving town. They apparently wanted to get all the way to the end, but they couldn’t get past the new puzzle area known as Floor 7-3! I got the feeling that was the first time the puzzle area had ever proven useful. Hell yeah.

＊ ＊ ＊

The thought suddenly occurred to me that I should organize my {Storage}.

For some time, my {Storage} had been overflowing with all sorts of insanely dangerous stuff. The black bomb that exploded on a keyword, the purple Dungeon Core, the pure Dungeon Core from Father, the Orichalcum Blade... and on top of that, precious treasure I could never speak of to anyone. There were also several spell scrolls I hadn’t gotten around to reading yet.

“Wait... What?”

Or so I thought, anyway.

I turned my {Storage} completely inside out, but nothing fell out. The only thing inside was the Dungeon Core I got from Father. It fell out, but nothing else did.

“The hell...?”

Luckily, the Divine Bedding was safe—I was wearing the Divine Pajamas as a jersey, and the Divine Alarm Clock was on my arm as a wristwatch, so neither had vanished. Rokuko had the Divine Blanket and Divine Quilt, so those were safe as well. But where had everything else gone? Neither the cooking I had Kinue make nor the Golem Blades I was storing were there. I stuck my hand into {Storage} and felt around, but felt nothing. Usually I would instinctively be able to sense where things were through magic.

I peered inside. It looked like an empty void from the outside, but maybe I could see if I stuck my head inside...? Nah, that ran the risk of time freezing for my head, which would get promptly decapitated. Testing that alone would be too risky. I needed a helper.

“And so that’s why you called me,” Rokuko said.

“Yeah. When it comes to stuff like this, you’re the one I can rely on the most, so yeah. I’m gonna stick my head inside {Storage} while moving my hands, and if they stop moving, pull me out immediately.” After all, Dungeon Cores could keep functioning within {Storage} without stopping.

“Eheh, it doesn’t feel bad to be relied on. Okay. Go ahead.”

And so, with Rokuko there as insurance, I stuck my head inside my {Storage} to look around.

Ehhh... I still can’t see anything. There’s no light or sound.

But suddenly, light filled my vision. Rokuko had apparently pulled me out. I jumped in surprise, since I felt the odd sensation of my shoulder being tapped about ten times, but all ten taps happened at the same time.

“Whoa! Wait, what? It hasn’t even been five seconds.”

“Keima, are you okay? You completely froze. It’s been fifteen seconds.”

“Wait, really?”

I hadn’t noticed my consciousness pausing, but apparently I had remained conscious while being unable to realize I had stopped at all. Good thing I had paid for Rokuko Insurance.

Also, I hadn’t responded even after she tapped my shoulder a bunch. What I felt was probably all her taps building up and hitting me at once, then? I felt everything I should have felt while time was stopped? That was certainly a bizarre sensation.

“{Storage} is surprisingly dangerous, huh?” Rokuko said.

“Yup. Seems pretty possible for someone to accidentally put themselves into {Storage} and end up frozen forever.”

“I feel like their mana would run out... Oh, but maybe the exit would vanish, and they’d be stuck inside forever.”

Holy shit, that’s scary. But anyway... Where’d everything but that Dungeon Core go, then? Surely a hole didn’t open up in {Storage} that they all fell through or something... Though I mean, I guess I can’t discount the possibility, since I don’t understand how it works in the first place.

“Hey, Keima. This is the Core you got from Father, right? I see you still have it,” Rokuko said, stroking the unnumbered Dungeon Core.

“Hm? Yeah. I can use Dummy Cores to level up {Ultra Transformation}, so yeah.”

“Hmm... Maybe all your stuff went inside it, then?”

“Huh?”

“I mean, I have my Master Room, don’t I? It wouldn’t be weird for this Core to have one, too.” Rokuko slapped the Core a bit. Her theory made sense.

“I see. It’s a real Core, not a Dummy Core.”

“If so, the extra space will be pretty convenient. Though we have to figure out how to see inside of it for starters,” Rokuko said, placing her hand on the Core then grunting with focus. Apparently she was trying to get inside of it. I had to question whether Cores could enter other Cores, but then again, we had entered Mikan’s Dungeon Core before. Or he let us enter it, I guess?

“I think we might be able to get inside if we force the door open. Keima, you do it, too.”

“S-Sure?”

I put my hands on the opposite side of the Core from Rokuko. I recalled how it usually felt to enter Rokuko’s Master Room, and lightly poured my mana into the Core to open it... though maybe it would be better to flood it in to force it open.

I poured my mana into the Dungeon Core, and its glowing began to clearly intensify. Did that mean... it was working?

“Mm, I feel like we need just a bit more to get inside.”

“We want to at least get the Orichalcum Blade back from it.”

Rokuko and I pushed more into it, which led to it getting engulfed by a fluffy golden light.

Uhhh. It’s giving off a kind of divine aura now, but... I feel like we’re making a critical mistake here. Because I mean, this doesn’t happen when you’re going into a Core’s Master Room, does it?

“Hey, Rokuko.”

“Mm?”

“What exactly are we doing here?”

“Well, obviously we’re... Um... What are we doing?” Rokuko tilted her head.

C’mon. The light’s getting even brighter.

“Y’know, I think we should stop this now.”

“What a coincidence. I thought the same just now, and tried to stop, but I can’t seem to no matter how hard I try.”

“That can’t be... Wait, I can’t take my hands off?!”

My hands were stuck flat against the Core, like they were being sucked by a vacuum cleaner. Even if I tried to stop pouring mana out, it came out on its own. Although not a ton.

“Rokuko, are you okay?”

“Oh, uh-huh. I can’t take my hands off, but I feel fine. By the way, this is kind of sudden, but I really want to get in the onsen right now. Can we go?”

“Uh... No.”

“Aw. Darn it.”

Why would you ask that when our hands are tied, anyway? Were you planning to go to the boys’ bath or the girls’ bath? We don’t have a mixed bath at our family onsen... Ah, crap, I gotta use the bathroom.

“Still, what should we do here? We’re kinda stuck...” Rokuko said.

“Hmm... Maybe we can use the dungeon functions to get away?”

“Your {Ultra Transformation} might work, too. Aah, but, ummm... I think we should stay like this a bit longer. I mean, we’re kinda stuck, sooo.” Rokuko, with her hands still on the Core, leaned forward to bring her face close to mine.

Er, what.

“...Keima. Let’s kiss.”

“Er, but...”

It happened just as Rokuko whispered while blushing. The Dungeon Core shot out an intensely bright light.

“Gah, my eyes!”

“Eeep?!”

I moved my hands to try to cover my eyes, and the Core flew upwards. Apparently my hands had disconnected from it midway through lifting them up.

The Core arced through the air, scraped the ceiling, then plopped right back into my still-open {Storage} portal. Nice shot. Anyway, an enormous beam of light shot out of {Storage}, forming a pillar against the ceiling, and then... calmed after a few seconds.

“Well, it doesn’t look like the ceiling’s scratched. The hell was that all about?”

“Who knows...? Is everything in your {Storage} okay?”

“We’re here because everything but the Core vanished, but... Let’s see.” I stuck my hand into {Storage}.

I felt something hard, but soft. Hmm? I touched it a bit more, and just as I thought it was silky smooth yet also bumpy, something warm and wet rubbed against my hand.

“Guh?! Wh-What the?!”

“Keima?”

“There’s something inside the {Storage}! It licked my hand...?!”

When I pulled my hand out, it was wet. A sniff confirmed the scent of saliva. While cleaning my hand with {Purification}, I concluded whatever was inside was a living being with a mouth.

“But time stops for living beings in {Storage}, doesn’t it? Let me try.”

Rokuko stuck her hand into my {Storage}, then immediately balked with surprise.

“Bwuhwuhwuh?! S-Something’s inside!”

“See? See?! I told you!”

“What the heck what the heck?! Oh, it’s kinda silky. Hair?” Rokuko timidly felt around inside the {Storage}.

“Ngh?! I-It grabbed me! K-Keima, help!”

“I-I’ll pull you out!”

I tugged on Rokuko. And as she came out... so too did a black-haired girl, who was firmly gripping Rokuko’s wrist.

“...Uh, who are you?” I asked.

“Keima, who’s this? Do you know them?”

“Nope.”

The girl’s eyes were shut, but she opened them wide. She had blue eyes that felt familiar somehow. Or rather, on the whole, she looked a lot like Rokuko... Oh. Oh no. The girl opened her mouth and spoke with an energetic tone the fated words:

“Papa! Mama! Hi, I’m your daughter!”

Rokuko and I froze. The smiling girl paused, then tilted her head.

“...Papa! Mama! Hi, I’m your daughter!!!”

“We heard you the first time,” I said. Deep breaths. Calm down... Okay. I think I’ve got it.

“You’re the Dungeon Core from a second ago, right?!”

“You think so?” Rokuko asked. “Right, Dungeon Cores can move inside {Storage}... But wait, by papa and mama, you mean us?! A-A daughter... Now that you mention it, she does look like Keima!”

“No way, she has your eyes, Rokuko.” Wait, why are we talking like a couple gushing about a newborn baby?

“So, just to theorycraft here... You and I poured our power into that Core, right? And then... some part of us got absorbed and a new Dungeon Core was born... I guess?”

“Ah. Right. I get it... In other words, this is our child!”

“I’m a dad now...?”

“You two are fast on the uptake; that’s my papa and mama for you! That’s basically it!” The girl clapped her hands and approved of our theory with a smile.

I can’t believe I slipped up like that. What, does this mean we really have had our first child? I mean, who’s ever heard of a first child that popped out big and able to speak? Maybe Dungeon Cores are different.

“Anyway, I’m gonna go ahead and ask Father about this.”

“Oh, then I’ll tell Haku ab—”

“ABSOLUTELY not, Rokuko! Save that for when we know what’s going on! Are you trying to kill me?” I exclaimed, only for a message from Father to arrive first. “Subject: Congratulations, Keima! It’s your first child!”

“Seriously...?”

A god used an email to confirm it was our daughter. Okay, let me check the actual mail...

Heya. First off, let me say congratulations. Seems like you and Rokuko completed the unnumbered Dungeon Core! It was a blank preset Core I made just for you to level up your Hero skill, but the two of you booted it up with your power. That makes you two the Core’s parents, no doubt about it. Take good care of her!

Well. That confirmed my theories.

P.S. I won’t give the Core a number, so be sure to name her! Also, I went ahead and connected the Core to the network so she can use the DP Catalog. Consider it my baby shower gift.

Seriously...? Well. Baby shower. Okay.

“What did Father say?” Rokuko asked.

“She’s our daughter, no mistaking it. And he wants us to name her.”

“Yay! What name should we go with!”

“Oh, oh! I want a cute name!”

“Gosh, I’ve never named a daughter before! I’m so nervous!”

Rokuko apparently had no issue with the Core speaking normally despite just being born, nor her raising her hands to speak as if she had already been raised somewhere with that culture. Maybe this was just how Dungeon Cores were, and the preset contained this sort of knowledge. Man, Dungeon Core births were pretty different from human births.

“Come on, Keima, think with me. She’s your daughter, too.”

“R-Right. I guess so, but... Uhhh... You. Where’d the Dungeon Core itself go?”

“Hm? It’s still in there,” the girl said, pointing at the still-open {Storage} portal.

Don’t tell me my {Storage} got turned into a dungeon? I’m gonna have to double-check this.

“So basically... your dungeon is...?”

“Your storage, mama!”

“Aaah, figures. That makes sense... Wait. What did you just say?”

“Like I said, mama’s {Storage} is my...”

What?! Mama?!

“W-Wait, why am I mama?!”

“Hm...? I thought about what I knew and determined you were my mama, mama! What, am I wrong?”

“I’m a guy, so I’m papa!”

“Oh, I see...? Boys are papas...? I didn’t know that.”

Hello, God of Darkness? I think your preset is kind of messed up.

“Gods are papas, and not-gods are mamas! That’s how it works to me!”

“Oh, that makes sense! That’s how it is with Father,” Rokuko said.

“I see you got the same education, Rokuko...”

Dungeon Cores were the children of gods. In other words, they were gods themselves. It followed, then, that I was mama...? Gah, why must divinity have such gender freedom?

“I’m a human and Rokuko’s a human-type Dungeon Core, so how about you treat us like you would humans?”

“Question, mama! When it comes to humans and gods, don’t you think gods should be given higher priority?”

“Please no... Just go with human rules here. Right, Rokuko? You don’t want to be called papa, do you?”

“Hm? I don’t really care either way. Eheheh, it’s our daughter!”

Oh no, she’s not on my side. I have to fix this, fast.

“Keima. What’s important is that she’s our child. Isn’t deciding who’s the papa and who’s the mama trivial in the face of that?”

“I admire the mindset, but this makes it sound like I’m the one who gave birth to her.”

“Didn’t you...?” Rokuko pointed to my {Storage}.

Ah... Huh. So I’m a mama... The phrasing reminds me of Tsia’s slums. I’d really rather not be called that since those memories are traumatic, but...

“Okay, how about this. The phrase ‘Keima mama’ is repetitious and hard to understand, so call me papa instead.”

“Okay! Papa!”

“I don’t really care either way, but if that’s how it is in your language, it’s fine with me,” Rokuko said.

Seriously?! I mean, I’m glad you both caved in, but still. Wow.

“Anyway, time for the name. She’s an unnumbered Core, so let’s call her Soto temporarily.”

“Sototemporarily? What does that mean?” the girl asked.

I blinked, dumbfounded by her including ‘temporarily’ in the name, but before I could correct her, Rokuko clapped her hands with a big smile.

“Sototemporarily! I like that name. Soto means external, exceptional, and unnumbered in Japanese. This kind of vocabulary is cake to me now.”

“No, I said her name can temporarily be Soto. Got it? Temporarily.”

“Right, like momentarily, for now, and so on. Easy!” Rokuko exclaimed. “Sototemporarily, or Soto for short! It’s so cute... I love it!”

Why do Cores like weird things so much?! Is this just like her finding a foreign language cool because it’s foreign? She’s literally hugging herself and twisting with glee here... Wait, is she trying to act like that isn’t a temporary name?

“We’ll think of an actual name later! Your name is not going to be Sototemporarily.”

“Too bad. It’s decided! I’m Sototemporarily! Call me Soto for short!”

“Please, let me think of an actual name. Please.”

“Give me socks, then. I’ll think about it if you give me freshly removed socks... Oh, you aren’t wearing socks right now, papa! There aren’t any in {Storage}, either. Too bad, the deal is off!”

What is she even saying? I mean, she’s right that I’m not wearing socks, since I’m in my room, but...

“And so, my name is Sototemporarily, i.e. Soto! It’s settled!”

“Congratulations, Soto. Oh, and Keima gave me my name, too. It means 695 in his language,” Rokuko said, puffing out her chest with pride.

I’m sorry. It’s all my fault... In so many ways...

“Wooow! Papa’s a natural at giving names!”

The worst part is, that’s not even an insult. She actually thinks that. Can I just... go to sleep, to escape reality? No? Okay, then I’ll just pop off to the bathroom real fast. I’ve been holding it in for a while now.

＊ ＊ ＊

When I got back from the bathroom, Rokuko and Soto were (naturally) still in my room. Soto was getting hugged and cuddled to death by Rokuko. They looked more like siblings than mother and daughter... Oh, her name? Yeah, I gave up, she was Soto now. Not much I could do when she was dead set on keeping it...

“Oh. I need to check with Ichika that Soto’s not a weird name.”

“Don’t worry about that. I asked her while you were in the bathroom,” Rokuko said. Apparently Ichika had coincidentally dropped by while I was away. The name wasn’t weird at all. Whew. No repeat of the Niku disaster here.

Then, I noticed the still-open portal to my {Storage}. Why isn’t it closing...? Is it because it’s Soto’s dungeon now?

“Want me to close it, papa?”

“Er, yeah.”

Soto waved a hand, closing the {Storage}. It was my {Storage}, but it didn’t feel like mine anymore. I got the feeling it would be dangerous not to investigate this.

“Just to be safe, I’ll give you back the right to open and close it, papa!”

“Oh, you can do that? Well, makes sense, it is my {Storage}, so... Wait. Speaking of which... Soto. Where’d all the stuff in my {Storage} go?”

“Eheh!” Soto smiled while audibly faking a laugh.

“...Where’d it go?”

“Teehee!”

Don’t teehee me!

“Thanks for the meal!”

“Well, there was food in there, sure...”

“It was all super yummy!”

“The Orichalcum sword? The bomb?”

“Doubly so! They were really energizing... Eheheh.”

“I see, you ate them. I see...”

What kind of terrible meal is that?! I mean, I get that Dungeon Cores can eat anything, but still. Guess I should just be glad she didn’t eat any of the Divine Bedding... It’ll take time to get the orichalcum back, but we have a steady source of it, so it’s not a fatal blow or anything. No point crying over spilled milk.

And then, it happened. The door was flung open.

“Master, congratulations on your birth,” Niku said, with an excited expression... or rather, she was stoic as always, but her tail was wagging rapidly. She looked at Soto, who was still being hugged by Rokuko, and approached her before kneeling. “Your name is Soto, I am told. I am Niku Kuroinu, Master’s head slave. It is nice to meet you.”

“Aaah, so cute! Gimme your socks!”

“Hm? Okay.” Once she understood what Soto was saying, Niku took off the knee socks of her maid outfit without hesitation. She rested the freshly removed socks in her hands and offered them up to Soto, her brown legs laid bare. “Here.”

“Eheheh, thaaanks. Nom!” Soto gripped the tip of the knee socks, opened her mouth wide, and ate them. She just... took a big bite.

“What the?! Spit it out! Spit it out!” I cried.

“So gooood! Socks are the best! They taste just like what I ate inside papa!”

Soto ignored my cries and kept chewing down Niku’s knee socks. It may have looked like she was eating a baguette, but they were definitely socks. She was chewing on them as if they were normal food, like radishes or bread or something.

What the heck kind of teeth does she have? And did she eat the socks in my {Storage} the same way? So much so the flavor became near and dear to her?

“Okay, you’re definitely Keima’s daughter. Be sure to chew before you swallow, okay?” Rokuko said while handing a fresh pair of socks to Niku.

“I am glad to see that Master’s seed is strong,” Niku said. Soto finished the right sock and got to work on the left one, this time starting from the thigh part.

Excuse me?! I’ve never eaten socks before! I physically couldn’t if I wanted to!

“Do you know the tastiest way to eat strawberries? You start with the leaf. That way you leave the sweet tip for last and end on the best note possible. Socks are the same way. The toes are the tastiest part. Nom nom nom.”

“Uh, no. Socks aren’t food,” I said.

“Don’t worry, papa. I’m a Dungeon Core, so I won’t get tummy aches from eating socks.”

“That’s not the problem... Or wait, maybe it is?”

Adults stopped children from eating weird things because they ran the risk of getting sick or poisoned. Given that Dungeon Cores would be just fine eating socks, there was no need for me to stop Soto.

“Ngh, but... But...”

“Gulp! Aww, that wasn’t enough to convince you? Mmm... Maybe I should tell mama about the collection that was inside your {Storage}?” Soto whispered, quietly enough for only me to hear. W-Wait, she knows about my... M-My sock collection?! The collection of freshly removed socks I gathered from Niku and Ichika forgetting them, or Rokuko tossing them aside? Well, given that everything in my {Storage} is gone, we can conclude Soto ate the whole collection. Which means she knows everything. Curse you, Soto! You’re blackmailing me when you’re only one day old?! Dungeon Cores are terrifying!

“Collection? What’s that, Keima?” Rokuko asked.

“N-Nothing. Nothing at all!” I awkwardly blew Rokuko off, then dragged Soto to the corner of the room and started whispering.

“C-Come on. It’s not right to talk about people’s collections like that.”

“Hmmmm?”

“You can’t just steal people’s treasure and secrets from their {Storage}... That’s war!”

“...So this blackmail works against you, papa?” Soto grinned. Crap, I dug my own grave.

“B-But you don’t have any evidence of the collection anymore, so...”

“Don’t wooorry, I can recreate anything I eat! Take a look!” With a snap, Soto was suddenly wearing the knee socks she had just eaten. Judging by the placement of the stains, there was no mistaking they were the same pair of socks.

“Did you just pretend to eat them while stashing them somewhere?”

“Tch tch tch. Behold, for this is the Hero power I have inherited from you... {Teensy Reproduction}!” Soto declared, giving a smug grin that reminded me of Rokuko.

Hero power? Teensy, not ultra? Let me check my {Ultra Transformation} just to be safe... Ah, it’s level four now. It got drained? Probably something like that. I’ll go break a Dummy Core to boost the level back. This would’ve been pretty bad if I weren’t a Dungeon Master.

“I can recreate anything I’ve eaten once every hour. The copy disappears after one hour.”

“That’s pretty convenient... But why is it limited to things you’ve eaten?”

“No clue! If you don’t know something, papa, how could I know?”

True. Maybe it was meant for Heroes to reproduce food and potions they had before. The ‘teensy’ bit was suspicious, but whatever. Incidentally, given that she produced both of Niku’s socks, she could probably produce multiple things at once, unlike my {Ultra Transformation}.

“The one thing I can say is... I can eat your collection as much as I want, papa! I win!”

In conclusion, she could produce the Orichalcum Blade and Gravity Bomb whenever she wanted as well. It would be hard to use them as materials since they would disappear an hour later, but in return you could use and drop them instantly.

“So, want me to show mama your collection? Eheheh.”

Come on, I told you that wasn’t fair! What can I do but give in?! Gah!

“...Alright. I’ll keep quiet about you eating socks. But no more using my collection as a shield.”

“Yaaay! It’s a deal!” Soto threw up both her hands with joy. Sheesh. I can’t tell if I’m scared of what she’ll become, or if I’m scared of how much trouble she’s already going to be. Either way, she’s unmistakably our daughter.

...Unmistakably, huh? Yeah, I’m already thinking of her as my daughter. Strange. We only just met today, too. Is my soul recognizing Soto as my daughter? It’s possible. After all, Dungeon Cores are equivalent to gods.

Anyway, having no other choice, I permitted Soto to eat socks. Dungeon Cores had different physiologies in the first place. I had her eat a steel sword as an experiment, and she showed me the blade between her teeth like a toothpick... Eating socks didn’t seem so bad after that. Incidentally, she finished off the rest of the sword like a theater troupe—goer.

“I feel like I saw a child eat a sword like that in a manga before... Never thought I’d see a gag like that happen in real life.”

“I ate orichalcum, you know?” Soto grinned, showing her straight, shiny teeth. By the way, that manga character couldn’t eat rubber, but Soto had no such limitations. She could even eat konjak.

“That’s amazing, Soto. Here, have seconds,” Niku said.

“Yaaay! Thanks!” Soto happily accepted the iron ingots and ate them like jellied toast, while munching on bronze coins like potato chips. Jesus Christ, how horrifying. Did the entire inn look like a gingerbread house to her, by chance?

“Hey, Rokuko. Can you eat iron and stuff, too?”

“Ah, umm. I might be able to if I try, but not that much. I can absorb it easily, though.”

Oh yeah. Soto’s ‘eating’ is probably the same thing as ‘offering treasure,’ one dungeon function for gaining DP. If one exploited the Absolute Authority like Aidy did, I bet every Core could eat just like that.

“Anyway, how are we gonna explain Soto to the villagers? Just tell them I had a secret child all along?”

“She’ll probably be treated as Niku’s little sister that way,” Rokuko replied.

Oh yeah. Everyone was treating Niku as my daughter for some reason. By which I mean, because of our black hair.

“My little sister?” Niku repeated.

“I have a sister! Yaaay, big sis, could you wear tights for me from now on?”

“Tights? Okay. I’ll start wearing them tomorrow.”

“Yeees! White, I want white tights! You’re so cute, sis, I love you!” Soto exclaimed, gripping Niku in a tight hug.

Don’t tell me she likes the color white because she’s being influenced by Rin the wolf-slime thing through the bomb.

“Well, putting aside the villagers for now... There’s still the problem of introducing Soto in general. What to do about this...”

“Oh, by the way, I already sent a text to Haku.”

“What?!” I yelped in pure terror, only for Rokuko to shake her head with exasperation.

“Look, having a daughter is a big deal. She’d just get more mad if we kept it secret. Do you think we could hide it from Misha and Dolce? Hmmm?”

“...Okay, no, we couldn’t.” In which case, it was better to just get it over with. Getting a direct reply would help minimize the damage... I had one objective here: survive. That would be my win condition. I could stand to lose an arm or two.

“By the way, uh, did Haku reply?”

“Not yet... Oh, there it is.”

Eek! This is terrifying! I don’t know if I want to ask what it says!

“A-And? What’d Haku say?”

“Eheh, take a look, Keima. She’s blessing us.”

“Okay, let’s see.”

The text which Rokuko so smugly showed me went like this: Congratulations, Rokuko. This is all so very sudden, but I’m sure any daughter of yours is absolutely adorable. I want to bless you and her directly, so I’ll make time to visit tomorrow. Make sure Keima doesn’t run away, okay?

Yeah, that was a message that blessed Rokuko and Soto. I was not mentioned in a good light whatsoever.

“Which means we’re going to the [Ivory Beach] tomorrow,” Rokuko said.

“Guh. I wanna run away.”

“Nuh-uh. You’re Soto’s papa, Keima. Introducing her to Haku is an important road for you to walk as a parent, so get a grip.”

I glanced at Soto. She looked at me with hope-filled eyes, for some reason.

“Ngh... Fine, alright.”

And thus it was settled.

＊ ＊ ＊

I could hardly sleep with death so rapidly approaching. I needed a plan, and to that end I headed to the dungeon’s coliseum. There I would build the equipment I needed to survive Haku.

I guess it’s finally time. Time to make a gun. I’ve managed to hold back for this long, but I’m out of options. Though... maybe guns won’t be that strong in this world. You’re dead when you’re out of bullets, after all. Guns have strength when it comes to making commoners into soldiers, but individuals with mana like mine are definitely stronger with magic than guns. Bullets are fast enough to hit said normal people, but I imagine that once you reach a certain level of expertise, you’ll hit maybe the first bullet but then no more. That is, if they don’t dodge that first bullet after sensing your killing intent or whatever. Also, gunshots are loud enough that they might dodge easily after the sound warns them.

Maybe I could make a full metal jacket of orichalcum to pierce the enemy’s armor? That’d be kind of a huge waste, since there would be no getting those bullets back. I’d only make one or two for Soto to use in an emergency... Wait, I need to be thinking of my own equipment here. Right, how about I finally unleash electricity, which I had likewise been avoiding up until now? I’ve got copper, iron, and magnets. I can even buy rubber with DP, which means I can make electromagnets. If I make them into a Golem, I could have a Golem Dynamo right there. Even winding coils would be easy if I used Golems like lathes.

But what would I even use electricity for? Golems could turn motors on their own, and magic tools provided plenty of light. Railguns? I don’t know enough to make those. Wait, is electricity kind of useless here? I could run electricity through water to make hydrogen... but buying hydrogen flat out with DP would be better. Ehhh. I had to hide the existence of the Golems from normal people, which was inconvenient, but it wasn’t like any of this would be useful against Haku. Magic was still stronger.

“...{Element Shot}.” A beam of light shot out and pierced the coliseum’s wall.

Yeah, that’s stronger and faster than most weapons, and I can shoot it out like a Gatling gun. Also, I can shoot it without chanting, so I don’t even need to worry about covering my mouth.

If I were to make a weapon for myself, it would be much better to think of ways to use magic than ways to exploit my old Japanese science knowledge. Electricity would just have to be something I sold to someone else to develop. It would be good for improving the lives of people, but on a personal level, it meant nothing due to the DP catalog and magic. Guns, on the other hand, would just introduce the risk of someone shooting me out of nowhere, so nah.

Yeah, I’m just gonna keep both of those to myself, like I have been. Right.

Magic would be a good enough weapon, but what really mattered was my defense. Not even the strongest weapon in the world would matter if you died before you could use it. Thus, I decided to make specialty armor. Or more specifically, a power suit. We had the Dai-Frame as a rideable work Golem, but it had a major flaw: the huge gaps in the frame. They were made for construction, and thus had no armor. Or rather, they were kept breezy for vision purposes, and the person inside would die easily from stabs and the like. It had been pretty dangerous when I fought Aidy before. If not for the pilot being a fake made with Rei’s illusions, I would have died countless times.

And so, this time I was making an armored Golem. It seemed like a good idea to repurpose the Golems with full plate armor that had been gathering dust in the Master Room ever since I made them for Rei and the other’s naming ceremony. They had survived Soto’s feasting since they were too big to comfortably put in {Storage}.

Anyway, the plan was to utilize the know-how I got from the Dai-Frames to make joints with an orichalcum alloy to make smooth Golem Assistance, while also using a honeycomb structure to lessen the armor’s weight. Covering the honeycombs with orichalcum should result in equal defensive power regardless of the empty insides. Oh, and I would want some kind of insulator on the inside to soften it.

As for my remaining stock of orichalcum, well, it was in pretty dire straits due to Soto eating the orichalcum blade we got from Father. I figured I could use one of the thumb-sized Orichalcum Golems cloned by the boss spawner (that we also got from Father) to get the orichalcum I needed. It would just about suffice for a thin layer of plating, though it would have to be very thin indeed.

Also, since it took a full month for the Orichalcum Golems to regenerate, we didn’t exactly have much of a stock here. Why was it that thumb-sized Golems took a month when he said even a Red Dragon would only take two weeks? Is it because they were made of material that was just too useful? That was possible.

I got right to work. I scattered the suit of armor and started punching out the honeycombs. The orichalcum wouldn’t last if I had to cover the inner parts of the honeycombs, so I covered them with a layer of iron à la aluminum foil, then put on the orichalcum plating.

Aaah. This is tedious, but comfy.

The removed hexagons of iron clattered on the floor as I worked my way through the armor. I lifted up a fully honeycombed piece of the armor and felt for myself how much lighter it was. Naturally, such thorough honeycombing would weaken the armor, but the orichalcum plating on top strengthened it right back up. And so, it ended up gleaming with the color of orichalcum... Yeah, it was kind of lame how wearing a full suit of orichalcum armor would lead to constant shining.

I mean, this kind of shining is reserved for when the protagonist awakens to his true power and achieves his final form, no? It kinda hurts my eyes, so I’m just gonna hide it beneath a layer of paint. Simple is best here. Simple is best.

That said, the eye slits were actually a terrifying weak point. Maybe breaking a mana potion and mixing the glass with orichalcum dust would make bulletproof glass... Nope. I would have liked to make a full face helmet, but... Wait. This armor is a Golem, which means it’s a monster, which means I can see through its vision using the monitor. If I place that vision on the inside parts of goggles... Okay, yeah, it’s hard to focus my eyes. Guess I’m done for... No! I can use the principles that VR goggles are founded on and use those glass lenses from before.

If I bend the footage around it... Done! It works! I ended up sticking VR goggles into the old helmet, but this lets me see while still protecting my eyes! A normal person would end up blind in here, but that doesn’t matter since I’m the only one who’s going to use it! Oh, I know! I can use the water cutter magic tool I put on the Iron Haniwa Golem, too... Er, wait, I still just want to use magic for combat. This is good enough for my armor. I don’t have time to mess around, this should do it.

And so, I built a suit of armor in the coliseum nobody visits. I honeycombed parts, then painted over them in a loop that continued until apparently the sun rose and set. Rokuko came all the way to get me. I yawned, and started to put on the finished armor with bleary eyes.

“Come on Keima, it’s time to go! She’s waiting!”

“Whoa, wait!”

Despite having only put on the greaves, Rokuko pulled me away and took us to the [Ivory Beach] where Haku was waiting.

＊ ＊ ＊

Rokuko, Soto, and I went to the [Ivory Beach]. Rokuko couldn’t move Soto with her placement function, so she followed in my {Storage}. Which made sense, given she lived in my {Storage} to begin with, but...

Gaah, I wish I had more than just the greaves. I should’ve put the armor into {Storage}, but I missed my chance since I left it out so the paint could dry. Crap.

“So you’ve finally arrived. I’ve been waiting,” came a voice. There she was: the lord of darkness known as the Ivory Goddess. I didn’t want to come. I really didn’t want to come. What’s with that black aura radiating off her? Why do I feel the ground itself trembling in her presence?

“Morning, sister!”

“Good morning, Rokuko. You are as cute as ever today,” Haku said, her attitude shifting on a dime the second she turned to Rokuko. It felt like she was deftly avoiding Rokuko with all the murderous intent she was shooting my way. I wanted to vomit.

She hugged Rokuko and patted her head, then turned to smile at Soto. “So, this is the unnumbered Core you mentioned?”

“N-N-Nice to meet you, Auntie Haku!”

“Auntie... Mm, I suppose I am your aunt, since you’re Rokuko’s daughter. And what might your name be?”

“R-Right! I’m Soto! I-I’m, I’m in your care!”

“Why are you groveling?”

Hey! No fair, Soto! If you grovel before her first, I’ll miss my opportunity to do the same! I need to chain her off and get on the ground, too... Oh no, the greaves are in the waaay! I should have modified them to be easier to move in!

“Please, stand up. You being Rokuko’s daughter means you’re my niece, no? Your head is that of a noble, and not one to be lowered too easy.”

“Y-Yesh, ma’am!” Soto jumped up like a toy spring. Haku gave a refined giggle at that.

A-Are we forgiven n— Oh, just Soto. Okay, I understand, no need for all the murderous energy. I’ll just die now. Gah, the greaves stopped me from groveling... To think the armor I made to protect myself actually dragged me down!

“Here now, Soto,” Haku said with a soft smile while beckoning her over.

“R-Right, auntie,” Soto replied, and got squished in a hug between Rokuko and Haku. Man, I bet that smells nice. Not that I’ll ask to trade places with her. Because I would be murdered.

“Ahaha, you have Rokuko’s eyes. So adorable.”

“Aaaah, you’re so beautiful! Oof, oof, I’m falling in love! I want to be your socks!”

What the absolute hell is my daughter saying?

“Sister, her pitch-black hair is just like Keima’s, don’t you think?”

“Mm, that does subtract a few points. But the fault lies not with her.”

“What?! I’ll dye it, then! Red, blue, white, blonde, whatever! Papa, you have items for that, right?!”

Hey! You got that hair from me, treat it better! I shouted internally, but my protests were silenced by a sudden cold shiver running down my back.

“Papa, hmm...? I see. Papa. Keima...?” Haku said, finally directing her ice-cold smile my way.

Alright. I missed my chance to grovel a second ago, but now’s my time to make up for that.

“You are prepared to lose, oh, four or five of your arms for this, yes? I will listen to your last words afterwards.”

“Er, you do know humans only have two arms, right?”

“Perhaps you are less used to this world than I thought. This world has a very convenient torture tool by the name of Restoration magic, you know. I shall teach you of its virtues firsthand. Learning through experience makes it harder to forget, no? Though, whether you survive to make use of that experience is another story entirely.”

Eek?! You can use Restoration magic like that?!

“Oh, and now that I think about it, you even have {Ultra Transformation}. A splendid skill that lets you die three times per day. How convenient for cases where my hands slip. Though I have such experienced, skilled servants that they would never make mistakes like killing a human; it is mere insurance.”

“Th-Those servants do sound nice to have! Well, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get going...”

“You think you can escape?”

The run function doesn’t work in the Demon King boss fight?! That doesn’t make sense, Haku isn’t even in the Demon King faction!

“Sister, come on. That’s enough teasing Keima. Let’s talk,” Rokuko said. Haku clicked her tongue.

“Keima... You will explain the meaning of this, yes?”

“Er, an unforeseen accident occurred.”

“I see. You failed to use protection due to an accident? Now, you have committed the sin of defiling and knocking up Rokuko despite Misha and Dolce keeping their eyes on you—but just how large of a sin did you commit? How many times do you wish to be executed, hmmm?”

Gaaah! Her murderous intent is getting even more thick! Haku’s emitting such a horrifying aura I could probably sense how she plans to execute me if I just got near her! I-I’m sorry!

“Hmm? Wait, sister. What does ‘knocking up’ mean?” Rokuko asked, putting a hand on her mouth.

“Raising a child in one’s stomach, no? This child... Soto, came from you, no?” Haku asked, stroking Rokuko’s hair. Stroke stroke. Pat pat.

“Eek! That tickles, sister. Oh, ‘knocking up’ means impregnating someone.”

“That’s right. Ngh, and I even went out of my way to avoid describing this. Which means Keima taught you...”

“Oh, no. I learned about it from a couple in the town, not Keima.”

“...Oh, really? I see, well, I suppose that will happen in a town... Ngh, and thus her mind was defiled... Perhaps I should wipe it off the map? No, it’s too late for that, and it’s something I should have taught her. I will spare them,” Haku said, muttering some pretty violent things to herself.

“Also, it was Keima who got knocked up, sister. Though it was his {Storage}, not his stomach.”

“...Hmmm??? Is Keima not the father here?” Haku asked, tilting her head.

Soto shot her hand up. “Auntie! I’m only calling him papa because humans call men papas! He’s actually my mama. That’s a secret, though!”

“Hm...? I...” Haku blinked. “Rokuko. Could you tell me how exactly this child was given life?”

“Ummm, do you remember the Dungeon Core that Keima got from Father before? He was keeping it in his {Storage} the whole time, and...”

“Wait, that Core? The one he got after the battle with Core 564?”

“Right, that one. It all started with...” Rokuko began, and as Haku listened to the explanation, her murderous aura faded.

“Aaah, I-I see... I suppose a child born through human means would not get so large so fast. So you used the method I taught you earlier... I see.”

“I forgot about it until it happened... I only remembered your lesson after Soto was born.”

“I see. In short, it truly was an unforeseen accident as Keima said. I-I see.”

Huh. Seems like having her call me papa was a mistake.

Haku had understood me to be the father through Rokuko’s text and thus concluded that we had made a child through the non-divine method. She thought we had skipped over marriage and gotten right to doing the dirty deed.

“You know, sister. Now that I think about it... you lied to me about sexual reproduction, didn’t you?”

“Ngggh?! Er, no, I-I, you have the wrong idea. I just, well...”

“That’s so cruel. I believed in you... But making children certainly does come with a lot of responsibility. You must have wanted to avoid me having a child before I was ready so much that you even lied for my sake. Right?”

“Y-Yes! That’s exactly right, Rokuko!”

“Then you’ll accept Keima as Soto’s parent, right?” Rokuko gave a bright smile. Haku faltered with a choke.

“You didn’t know the divine method of making children, correct?” Haku asked, shooting me a glare with her pupils glowing red.

“N-Not at all! I didn’t know anything!”

“No reaction from the lie detector. Very well, I will forgive you this time... in honor of cute little Soto.”

“Yes ma’am! Thank you very much!”

She forgave me! I get to live with my five limbs! Thank you, Soto. I’ll tell Ichika to give you her freshly removed socks later! I’ll even toss in Kinue’s!

“A shame that the torture devices I prepared will go unused...”

“H-Hahaha...”

Haku dropped loads of pointy, sharp weapons out of her {Storage}. Her going out of her way to show me them was probably her way of warning me that there would be no next time. I hear you, loud and clear.

“Wow, these look tasty. Auntie Haku, can I eat these?” Soto asked, drooling as she looked at the weapons.

“Erm. They are not food, but... I suppose, you may eat them if you want? What?”

“Yaaay! Thank you!” Soto squealed, then tossed all of Haku’s torture implements into her {Storage}, or rather, her dungeon. That was easier for Haku to accept as a fellow Dungeon Core than her suddenly biting down on them.

“I knew it, they have magic enchantments! Aaah, so tasty... I’m filled with energyyy!”

“Oh my. I see, so that {Storage} is your dungeon. And by eat, you meant absorbing them. Hm... What does it look like on the inside?” Haku asked, peering into the pitch-black {Storage} dungeon with great interest.

“Do you want to go inside? Eheheh, I don’t mind giving you a special invitation to visit, auntie. Oh, but you have to pay with your socks... Your tights will do just fine.”

“Um, my tights?”

Noooo! Soto! Don’t say stuff like that, she’ll say it’s my fault and have me hanged! And I haven’t even raised you at all yet! I’m your parent, but who would say I raised you like this in a single day?!

“Ah, you’re playing around? I see. One moment.”

In a shocking twist, Haku slid her fingers beneath her black tights, slid them down right in front of me without any shame, then handed them to Soto!

“Will that do?”

“E-Eeeeeeeeeeeeep! Really?! These are Goddess-tier legendary rares! These are going into the museum for sure! Thank you, thank you so much! They will be my family’s sacred treasure forever!” Soto said, bowing her head in respect while holding up the tights reverently. She had just been told not to lower her head so lightly, but Haku was so overwhelmed by the enthusiasm she didn’t even comment on it.

“I-I am not sure what you are getting at here, but... may I come inside?”

“Yes! Yes, of course, come right in! Though it’s a tiny dungeon with nothing in it!”

“I’ll be going inside, then.”

“Watch your step! It’s dark!”

The instant Haku jumped into the {Storage} and disappeared out of sight, Soto chomped down on the tights and swallowed them all at once. She had no need to hold back when it came to food thanks to her {Teensy Reproduction}. Or rather, the sooner she ate it, the sooner she could make infinite copies.

Still... I hate to say this, but seeing my own daughter wolf down tights with her cheeks bulging is kind of, uh, uncomfortable.

“Mmm! Fwaah, s-so GOOOOOD! It tastes too good, m-my knees are giving out! I’m falling over! I can’t stand! Mama, hold me up!”

“Mm? Good grief. You really are Keima’s daughter.”

Hey, why are you blaming me for this? She’s your daughter, too, Rokuko.

“Oh, by the way, Auntie Haku’s moving around in my dungeon just fine. Weird, time should be stopped in there.”

“Oh, right, it turns out that Dungeon Cores... or rather demigods... don’t have their time stopped inside {Storage}. It doesn’t stop for Rokuko, either.”

“Oh, neat. Big sis Niku ended up frozen inside of it, so I was wondering.”

Hey, what the heck were you two doing while I was busy making armor?

We chatted for a second, and not long afterwards Haku returned from {Storage}.

“The structure reminds one of Rokuko’s past methods, but there were rooms and everything. It was far larger than a normal {Storage}.”

“Really?” I asked.

“Did you not know? Goodness, do your research. Soto’s life depends on her dungeon.”

“I mean, humans end up frozen in there, so. Can’t even use lights.”

“A fair point, I suppose,” Haku said with a sigh.

Wow. I thought Haku would’ve told me to investigate at the risk of my life. Maybe she’s so caught off guard from all this that she’s not in the mood for hostility. Though either way, I wouldn’t be able to do anything once my time stopped. I could give directions to Rokuko and Soto, though.

“Oh, that reminds me. I had a job I wanted to ask you to handle, Keima. Though you can refuse if you’d like, of course,” Haku said with a smile. Ah. This is not one I can refuse.

“Yeah? Ask me anything.”

“It seems the first prince of Daide visited Goren the other day. In truth, some troublesome business is occurring in Daide.”

Troublesome business, huh?

“First of all, do you recall our very own imperial princess, Emmymephy? The second prince of Daide has proposed to her.”

“Er, congratulations?”

“Think before you speak. A mere prince of Daide would never be allowed to marry anyone from the imperial family.”

“I see.”

The kingdom of Daide was a backwater country compared to the empire, and a prince was more or less equivalent to a low-ranked archduke. If they insisted on the marriage, they could at least explore the avenue of Daide being absorbed into the empire as a duchy, but it was better not to do that since Daide bordered so many other countries and there were a lot of complex circumstances. Even if they both wanted to get married, the chances of it happening were basically zero, and on top of that, Emmymephy wasn’t actually interested.

“Couldn’t you just reject him instantly, though...? I guess there’s some reason you haven’t.”

“Very astute. We investigated why he would make such a preposterous proposal in the first place, you see.”

Naturally, there were circumstances behind his request. Those circumstances were the key issue here.

Haku paused, then continued with a serious expression. “Beddhism has begun to spread in Daide... and it seems there is a black-haired, red-eyed woman there claiming to be a Beddhist nun.”

“Well, what do you want me to do?” I asked. That was undoubtedly Leona, and Leona wasn’t someone I could handle on my own.

“Just investigate the situation. If possible, I would like you to drag Leona before me, but I won’t ask the impossible. For now, just learn what you can.”

Oh no, she wants me to investigate Chaos? This is really not something I want to do.

“Also, there are other problems arising there, it seems. No doubt they are related.”

“What problems?”

Haku opened her mouth as if to speak, then stopped and shook her head. “No... I believe you will have to see for yourself and report what you find. I sent Wataru ahead of you, and it seems that handling this is beyond him.”

What terrible problem would it have to be for Wataru to be unable to handle it?

“I sent Emmymephy there under the guise of being a foreign exchange student with Wataru as her guard... but Wataru cannot comprehend the problems.”

“He can’t... comprehend them?”

“Yes. Likely due to his {Ultra Good Fortune}, the problems are avoiding him entirely. He unconsciously finds himself walking down different paths as if avoiding something.”

In short, Wataru couldn’t encounter the problems that were happening because they were beyond his ability to handle. He had the most powerful guard system of all time, which stopped him from encountering danger at all. Truly, {Ultra Good Fortune} was a terrifying means of self-defense.

“Emmymephy likewise has encountered no major problems due to Wataru protecting her, but... the reconnaissance troops I sent have all vanished. Their last message was that they would investigate a location that Wataru had been avoiding. No doubt they were erased,” Haku said with a smile.

Yeah, this sounds dangerous. Is she sending me there as an indirect way of telling me to go die? Probably. Yeah... Seems like she told Emmymephy to stick with Wataru at all times so she wouldn’t get killed. I wanna stick with Wataru, too.

“I suspect you will learn more by visiting Daide yourself, so I will say no more. Do your best investigating. And send reports through texts often.”

“Er, got it.”

And so, I accepted the job from Haku.

But why, what’s my reward...? Oh, er, right, never mind.

＊ ＊ ＊

And so, I safely arrived back at the Goren town chief’s residence. I slept and woke up to make sure it hadn’t been just a dream, and indeed my heart was still functioning properly.

“I’m alive! I survived!”

“You did it, papa! Yaaaay!”

“Yep. Thanks, Soto. And thanks to you, too, Rokuko. Praise be to all life!”

Rokuko shrugged with an exasperated expression as Soto and I high-fived.

“You always exaggerate so much, Keima. Haku was just teasing you.”

“No way.”

If I had ‘defiled’ Rokuko as a human, I would be ten feet underground right now. In the sense of being buried alive.

“By the way, Soto. Haku didn’t say anything about time being stopped for other things when she was in your dungeon, right? Can you control the time inside your dungeon at will?”

“Yup, I sure can! Though I can’t make it go faster than real time.”

Oho.

“So that means I could just go in and investigate normally, right? Why didn’t you say that to Haku?”

“Wha? I mean, papa... Aren’t you hiding everything you can from Auntie Haku? I thought I should hide stuff, too! I didn’t tell her about {Teensy Reproduction}, either!”

Oh, huh, she knows me pretty well. Maybe that stuff was passed onto her. She probably didn’t tell me about it beforehand so I didn’t say anything I shouldn’t when the time came.

“Well, whatever. I’ll want to explore your dungeon, then. How about it? It’s my {Storage}, too, so I wanna see how it’s holding up.”

“Okaaay. Oh, I’ll go ahead and make a room just for holding your stuff, papa! Gimme some DP!”

As expected. Haku said it was bigger than a normal {Storage}, so it makes sense it can be developed like a normal dungeon, too. This is kinda crazy.

“Don’t tell me you can connect it to other people’s {Storage}, too.”

“Wha? Should I not?”

“Uh.”

I said that as a joke, but apparently she actually could. Soto beamed. Uh, hold on, that’s way too much. That’s dangerous in so many ways.

“Ahaha, I’m just kidding. I can only connect it to mama’s, since she’s connected to your soul, to dungeon monsters’, and to Niku’s since she’s my Master!”

“Makes sense, it wouldn’t be so easy to connect to other people’s {Storage}... Wait, whoa, that’s still crazy.”

Ehhh, well... At least she can’t casually steal from the {Storage} of random merchants passing by. I— Wait.

“Did you just say Niku was your Master?”

“Uh-huh, I made her my Dungeon Master yesterday! I figured the faster it got done, the better!”

“Seriously...?”

I cradled my head. Somehow, Niku had become a Dungeon Master overnight. There wasn’t anything wrong with that, exactly... Well, it was bad that we wouldn’t be getting DP from her anymore, but with a whole town funneling DP into our pockets, that wasn’t much of a blow. Well... Better this than some weirdo becoming her Master, I guess. In the sense that I ain’t givin’ my daughter to just anybody.

“So, what about the job Haku gave us?” Rokuko asked.

“Well... What can we do but go through with it? There’s a road from the imperial capital leading to Daide, so.”

“Just traveling will take a few days, then?”

Yeah... Traveling always takes a while, especially when going somewhere for the first time.

“Are you going to go alone?”

“Nah, I want a guard. I’d like to bring Niku, but.”

Rokuko nodded to herself and rubbed her chin, as if she suddenly had an idea. “You know, Keima. Don’t you think it would be sad for just the father to go on a business trip right after his first child was born?”

“What?”

“It would be! So, Soto and I are coming with you! It’s a family vacation!”

“Uh.” A family vacation...?!

“A vacation! Yay! We get to go on a trip!” Soto exclaimed.

“Soto can connect {Storages}, so if you want to keep her a secret, she has to follow you from the start. And if we use the Divine Bedding, you can use your {Teleportation} as much as you want, no?”

“Wait, hold on, you’re actually planning on coming?”

“Obviously. Don’t tell me you’re planning to take the Divine Bedding on your own,” Rokuko said, already tossing her luggage into her {Storage}. That was some haphazard preparation for a vacation.

Wait, anything we don’t have we can just ask Soto to bring? Being able to buy anything with DP was already enough of a cheat skill, but now with Soto we could send items to and from our base at will... This is like those items that show up in RPGs sometimes, that let you get stuff from your storage boxes from anywhere in the world.

And so, before I knew it, I was heading down the road to Daide from the imperial capital with Soto and Rokuko on a family vacation, with Niku and Ichika brought along as guards. How could this have happened to me?

＊ ＊ ＊

So yeah, I used {Teleportation} down the road while recovering my mana on Rokuko’s lap pillow.

“Y’know Rokuko, I’m just gonna be real, aren’t I kinda out of place here on a family trip?” Ichika asked.

“It’s fine, you’re convenient to have hanging around.”

Adding more people didn’t even slow us down, since we could put them into Soto’s {Storage} dungeon and save mana by stopping their time. Which was good, since we were on this trip as nobles, and we would definitely need a servant experienced in those kinds of things.

“Still, Master. Pretty sure I heard Neruneh talking about how you hella turned down Rokuko’s lap pillow. What happened? Your face is glued to her thighs today, man.”

“Oh, you mean back during the Demon Realm trip. My hands were kinda tied there. Haku had a spy with us.”

I had thought that Haku would have guards follow us on this trip, but for better or worse, she didn’t have any subordinates who were free who would have been suitable considering Rokuko and Soto’s special circumstances. Thus, although Wataru was waiting for us in Daide, we were pretty much just on our own until then.

“Man, feels like forever since we actually went somewhere with you, huh, Ichika?”

“For real. Think the last time was when we all hit B-Rank?”

“And back then, we had Wataru, Mephy, and Gozou’s gang with us,” Rokuko noted. I thought back to how dangerous it had been, with Rokuko getting kidnapped and all.

“Speaking of which. Have you ever been to Daide, Ichika?” I asked.

“Duh. Though I mean, it was forever ago, since it was before I got all enslaved and stuff, so I dunno how good of a guide I’ll be. Hopefully that store’s still around.”

“What, a restaurant you liked?”

“Yuppers. Daide’s got some hella tasty grub. Get hype, my dude.” Ichika cackled. Yeah, if Ichika says it’s good, it’s gonna be real good.

“Well, you’ll still do better than any of us. Nobody else has been there.”

“That country’s got some real unique food culture since it’s surrounded by the empire, the Demon Realm, and the Holy Kingdom.”

“Do you know anything other than the food culture?”

“The gambling rules are tricky, too, since they’re all a big mishmash. You gotta double-check the rules before rolling the dice, I’m tellin ya. Alright? Promise me!”

Okay, yeah, figures. It’s Ichika we’re talking about. Food and gambling. I knew that.

I glanced at Niku and Soto while laying on the picnic sheet. They were playing all over the place to kill time.

“Check this out, Niku. Nom nom nom... Fwah!”

“That was iron, wasn’t it...?”

Apparently Soto’s idea of fun was to stuff iron into her mouth to the point of puffing her cheeks out like a squirrel. Soto slapped said cheeks, and a hardened ball of iron rolled out. Did that mean iron softened when it was in her mouth?

“Man, Soto really is your and Rokuko’s daughter. She’s just like you,” Ichika said.

“Hmm? I think she looks more like Rokuko.”

“Nah, I’m talking about how she made that iron soft. You do the same stuff with your {Create Golem}, don’tcha?”

Now that she mentioned it, I could make iron all pliable like that, too. Which meant I could chew down iron, too...? Oh, wait, I wouldn’t be able to digest it. I could play around with it like rubber, though.

We kept watching, and Soto tossed the iron ball into her mouth like a marshmallow and munched it down.

“She’s gotta be absorbing or withdrawing that iron with her dungeon functions, right?”

“Dude, I don’t know why you think I would know.”

She sure is a dungeon, I thought with a warm heart. Er... Though I should probably teach her {Create Golem} and stuff with a scroll. Maybe she could make Golems in her mouth and do crazy stuff with that.

“Master. An enemy attack. How do we respond?” Niku asked.

“Hm?” I sat up and saw that she was holding an arrow in her hand.

Bandits, surprising no one. Though Niku casually grabbing the arrow out of the air sure was surprising. What a good guard; she acted like she was playing around while still keeping a solid eye out for threats.

“I would say kill them all, but I think we might as well use the opportunity to capture as many of them alive as possible. You can cut off their limbs if you want, since we can just recover them anyway.”

“Understood,” Niku said before jumping off to attack the bandits. She beat them all in no time.

We took the opportunity to try closing the bandits into Soto’s {Storage} dungeon and experimenting to see if we could earn DP off them. We tossed them into dungeon jail cells while they were unconscious, and after some experimentation learned that while they didn’t earn DP when time was stopped, they earned about 500 DP a day under normal time. It seemed the passage of time was necessary to earn DP.

As for what came next for the bandits, Rokuko was excited at the prospect of our daughter having a DP source of her own, so we decided to just leave them in there. I felt a bit uncomfortable with bandits being in what was originally my {Storage}, but well, so it goes.

“Imperial law allows nobles to do what they want with any bandits they capture after getting attacked,” Rokuko said. “Their lives are literally ours, legally and practically. Eheheh.”

That begged the question of where she studied up on law, but apparently Dolce had informed her back in Goren. Rokuko was getting even more reliable!

But well, anyway, our road trip proceeded peacefully(?) like so, and after a number of days we arrived at Daide.