Epilogue

Day 354

Winter turned to spring. The snow melted and a gentle warmth enveloped the land. Some say that spring is the season for meetings and goodbyes. That was no exception for our [Cave of Greed], where a goodbye was being said.

“You’re leaving, Rin?”

“Yeah. It’s been, nice. Uuma.” The black wolf—or rather, the mysterious black Slime (Wolf Form)—Rin had promised to leave once their winter hibernation ended, and so they were. I thought up a plan to trick them into thinking there was an eternal winter going on, but that ran the risk of them discovering the truth, and I didn’t intend to go that far to keep a ticking time bomb in our dungeon.

“Oh. Right. I made, this. Take it.”

“Huh? What is it?” Rin tossed a ball my way. I caught it with my Messenger Golem hand. It was a baseball-sized black orb, so dark that it practically sucked in the light around it. The heck is this?

“It’s a, Gravity Bomb. Almost anything, hit with this, will, die.”

“Woah, don’t throw that kinda thing around. I don’t wanna explode.”

“Heh, heh. Surprised? Don’t worry. It has, a, keyword. Hold it, say the word, then throw it. The keyword is, Black Plate.” It has a safety mechanism...? That’s surprisingly thoughtful.

“Black... Oh, whoops. Better not say it right now.”

“Heh, heh, heh! Didn’t, fall for it, huh! You really, are, smart. Uuma.”

“Hahaha. Mind if I have another one? I wanna see if it actually works. On you, Boss.”

“Yeah. You can, have, more. I make them, myself, so there’s, a limit, though. Also... They don’t, work on, me.” Five black balls rolled out from within Rin’s black fur and dropped to the ground before they kicked them over my way. Are you a powder keg or something? You’re seriously like a walking nuclear bomb.

“That’s, all I can, give. Use them, well. That’s it. See you, later.”

“Yep... Wait, are you coming back? Next winter, maybe?”

“Don’t know. But don’t die, before, I do... Aaah. But you, can’t die, Uuma. Mm. Anyway. See you.” Rin left the cave, cackling.

Rin was seen boldly leaving the cave in the middle of the day by several adventurers who protected themselves with white plates. Apparently, Rin ate all of the plates like candy.

“...They’re gone.”

“Aaah, you know, it feels like a huge load’s off our shoulders now.” I let out a heavy sigh. Yeah, an unpredictable nuclear bomb camping out in our dungeon was just about as stressful as you’d expect. I felt an odd sort of relief, like the kind of relief you feel after finally getting something stuck between your teeth out after a long time of struggling.

Rin leaving the dungeon meant that our DP income took a big hit, but that was another problem entirely, and they had earned us so much over the winter it was far from a major problem. Not to mention that they gave us a very useful-looking parting gift in the form of these Gravity Bombs... I wonder how strong they really are. Not strong enough to destroy a dungeon, right? I honestly don’t know where I should store these things.

“Good work, Keima.”

“...Yeah.” It suddenly hit me that Rokuko had never told me what the High Priestess did that day. I had though there’d be a video of it since Rokuko was watching us through the monitor, but apparently she deleted the logs. Well, if Rokuko doesn’t want me to know what happened, I guess I’m fine not knowing.

Rokuko walked up to me.

“Keima. I-I think I’ll reward you, w-w-w-w-w-with... a kiss!” Her voice cracked and she looked up at me with bright red cheeks. You’re so nervous your pupils are dilating, y’know.

“Wh-What’s with you all of a sudden?”

“Oh, feeling nervous, are you?” Rokuko’s smug grin twitched rapidly as she spoke.

“...Yeah, you’re not fooling anyone. Don’t force yourself to act tough.”

“I’m not forcing myself! Come on, get your lips ready! You can keep your eyes open if you want! Or you can close them!” She grabbed onto my head and wrenched it so I was looking right at her. Christ on a bike, when’d she get so strong?! Ow, ow ow!

“Gah, nggh, ow! You’re gonna crush my head! Woah!”

“Nnn, nmmm...” Rokuko closed her eyes and brought her face up to mine. Then, she...

Forcibly kissed my nose with her eyes still shut. She licked the tip of my nose.

“...Um? Why is it hard...?” My nose kinda tickles, you know.

Rokuko pulled away and took a deep breath. Then, she realized she had been kissing my nose.

“...I missed.” You missed.

“J-Just you wait! I’ll kiss you next time for sure!” Rokuko ran off, spouting the line of a cartoon villain.

It took a minute for me to unfreeze after Rokuko left. Yeah... That surprised me so much I just froze up and didn’t say a word. My neck hurts.

“What did she mean, next time...?” I rubbed my nose and for some reason remembered how soft Rokuko’s lips were. Haku gave me a pass for the ring stuff, but I’m pretty sure she’s gonna actually try to kill me soon.