DAY 15: MORNING

DAY 15

MORNING

I should have known girls couldn’t appreciate wabi-sabi.

IN FRONT OF THE CAVE

THE TENT

 

TODAY WE PLANNED to hunt orcs again. The girls were ready to get their vengeance. They worked hard yesterday, even staging a mock battle in preparation.

If they could beat an orc on their own, they’d feel ready to search for town as well, so they were highly motivated. The nearby kobolds didn’t stand a chance against them, and they could easily face down a whole swarm of goblins. Only the orcs, the strongest monsters in the forest, remained undefeated.

Town probably had better weapons and people who could teach the girls how to fight. The girls, unlike me, leveled quickly, so if they managed to take down an orc, they had nothing left to learn from this forest. Will today be the end?

I decided to accompany them to town for numerous reasons. First, I wanted to see what it was like. Second, a group of twenty beautiful girls traveling alone would stand out. Even if they could defeat monsters, towns had thieves and other human foes that were probably more dangerous. Finally, the mean girls wanted to apologize and express their gratitude to the nerds. I wanted to see that happen. Hopefully, the nerds hadn’t been driven out of town yet.

No one called me for breakfast, so I did some morning practice.

I moved around quickly and swung my staff at full speed, trying to stay in motion. I’m so fast! I didn’t have much power or defense, so I had to be fast. I rehearsed combo attack after combo attack.

Having extended my staff, I held it in the center and stabbed to the left and right before finishing with a whirling attack. Then, I moved my grip to one end of the staff and whipped it in a wide overhead arc, shifted back to a center grip, and stabbed. Though I described the actions in discrete steps, it was actually a continuous flowing movement, with a ton of power behind it.

I kept moving. Each attack chained into the next one. I had to keep it up.

Fighting like this, I could contend with a group of monsters even if they surrounded me. As long as I kept my energy levels up, I could keep stringing together fast, piercing attacks.

“Wow, you’re on fire!”

I got so caught up in my training that I didn’t notice the girls show up and start watching. Good thing I didn’t strike a dorky pose at the end. Wait…I didn’t strike a pose, did I?

“Haruka-kun, did you do martial arts back home?” asked Fish Girl.

She thought this was martial arts. It probably looked legit because I was remembering and imitating martial arts movies while I whipped the staff around.

“No, not really. I improvised my own style, I guess?”

“Really? It looks kind of familiar.”

I’m just imagining fights from action manga, but that’s a secret I’ll take to my grave. My victory pose, too!

“What about breakfast?” I asked. “What’re we having?”

“Fish, of course.”

Today is another splendid day. I love fish.

We went out to hunt goblins and kobolds, stopping for fish and mushrooms on the way.

“I think the monsters eat the mushrooms,” Class Rep said. “That’s why there are so many of them. They’ll keep coming back even if someone tries to exterminate them.”

That made a lot of sense. The plentiful HP and MP restoring mushrooms around my cave meant strong monsters kept showing up.

“A lot of mushrooms mean a lot of monsters, right? And all those monsters scare off the animals?” I imagined all the fresh meat I could’ve been eating. “I have to kill all the goblins!”

We talked as we went deeper into the forest. Everyone else was already over level 30. The area around the cave was a great place to level up. Why was I was the only one left behind?

We finally found an orc, level 16. Too strong?

“There it is. Mind leaving it to me?” I asked.

“Sure,” the Class Rep replied. “Uh, please be careful?”

For some reason, even she’d started speaking in questions. Was I a bad influence?

Instead of sneaking or charging, I just ambled up to the orc. It attacked immediately, but I parried the orc’s swing with the right side of my staff. While it was off-balance, I spun around and swept its legs with the left end of the staff. It was unsteady but hadn’t fallen, so I feinted a stab at its eyes. When it raised its club in defense, I took another swipe at its exposed legs.

While it was hobbled, I dodged the wild swings of its club and slammed the staff into the hand wielding the club. By focusing alternately on the eyes, feet, and main hand, I kept myself safe from counterattacks.

The Class Rep was concerned that they weren’t strong enough to take an orc out directly, but the girls just needed to target an enemy’s weak points to prevent it from retaliating. As long as it can’t strike back, keep repeating that combo until it’s nearly dead and finish it off with a killer blow.

I flung a ball of fire at the orc’s face and then thrust my staff spear-like into its eyes. After blinding the orc, I knocked the club from its hands. Limbs battered, unable to attack, it stumbled.

I called over to the Class Rep. “Your turn. Want to finish it off with a flourish?”

“Thank you, Haruka-kun,” she said. “Today you were actually helpful.”

Leaping out from cover, the girls surrounded the orc. I only switched out because I was sick of fighting the orc, but that’s my little secret.

Hold on, what did she mean by “today?” I didn’t do anything wrong yesterday!

It’s not my fault the nerds totally misled me! I thought. Come on, Class Rep. She trash-talks me even while saying thank you.

One of the girls shouted, “Everyone stand back! Now!”

The girls cast a powerful magic attack in unison. A bit overkill if you ask me.

“Great work,” I said.

I gave everyone some fruit juice, and they immediately gulped it all down. Girls act totally different when you offer them something sweet, I thought. Fast, too—did one of them use Ground Shrink or something?

The second orc we found was level 10. A balanced fight. The girls flanked the orc as they fought. Unlike yesterday, each of them understood their role and attacked carefully and methodically, choosing the right targets. The archers and magic users aimed for the eyes. If the orcs protected their eyes, others leapt in to attack its legs. And if it guarded its legs, others went for the club. They had a winning strategy: pierce the eyes, crush the hands, and slash the legs. By working so well together, they kept each other safe.

No one needed me just then, so I decided to make lunch for everyone. For some reason, everyone was upset about my barbecue yesterday, so I decided to make salty fish and mushroom stew.

They didn’t like the floral decorations either, so there was no chance in hell I’d make the mistake of using flowers again. Unlike the nerds, I could actually read the room. I needed a different approach. It needed to be more subtle. Let’s go with a rustic Japanese style, wabi-sabi!

I gathered dead trees and smoked them, washed the logs, and finished drying them with Heat Magic. Then I made tableware out of the rough-hewn wood. I used Packing Magic to precisely straighten out thin branches and then shaved them into chopsticks. I sliced a log and sanded the slices into plates and bowls. I used the remaining logs as the table and chairs. Just as I added my finishing touches, the girls won their battle.

“Welcome back,” I called. “I made lunch!”

I’d even had time to prepare a handwashing station.

A tumult of voices answered. “Everything smells delicious! But that’s beside the point! We were busy fighting, and you thought it was a great time to plan a picnic? What if something went wrong?”

Are they mad at me again? I should have known girls couldn’t appreciate wabi-sabi. Lodge your complaint with the chef. Wait a sec, I’m the chef! I didn’t get why they were mad at me all the time. Was it a side effect of Blockhead?

Even though they were exasperated with me, they still asked for seconds. At this rate, I was worried my new title would be Bullied Kid or something.

After lunch, the girls fought level 8 and 11 orcs in quick succession. Then we found a big one, a level 15. It leered at Vice Rep B. No wonder it was so sleazy, its Alpha Male skill was level 5!

“Wh-why is it looking at me like that?!” she cried.

“C-could it…could it be going after girls with…y’know, breasts?” the Class Rep said.

“Waaah! No! Stay back! That’s so gross!”

“Grr…it didn’t even look at me! It’s so dead!” the Queen Bee hissed in a stage whisper.

“It’s coming my way! Stop! Someone, help!” cried Vice Rep B.

“It must be sooo hard having your figure!” the other girls teased.

“Aah! Betrayal!”

The Queen Bee chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’ll kill this thing!”

“Why?” muttered Vice Rep A. “Why is it totally ignoring me?”

This is bad—everyone’s arguing. The orc was defeated eventually, but the girls’ friendships didn’t survive unscathed.

As the sun set, we started our trip back to the cave. Everyone’s spoiling for an argument. I don’t like it!

“Did that orc come from like the World of Boobs or something?!” asked the Queen Bee.

“I can’t believe it completely ignored me!” cried Vice Rep A.

“Your life must be sooo hard with legs that long!” the rest of the girls jeered.

The apparent chumminess of the girls was only surface level after all. Does the World of Boobs really exist in this forest? Should I set my hopes on it?

We ate dinner, everyone took a bath, and then we commenced the council of twenty girls and one loner.

The Class Rep briefed us on the plan. “Tomorrow morning, we’ll follow the stream downriver. If we haven’t found a way out of the forest by the afternoon, we’ll come back, okay?”

“Sure,” I said. “Who knows if we’ll actually find anything. If we do find a road, town, or anything like that, then we can keep going.”

“Let’s make sure our preparations are perfect,” said the Class Rep. “Anything extra can fit into Haruka-kun’s Bag of Holding.”

“Got it!” the girls shouted. Huh, they’re getting along fine, now.

The girls gathered all their stuff into Villager A’s magical tent. I was fine making camp with a normal tent. We had plenty of dried fish and even more mushrooms. Twenty-one people could survive being stranded on a desert island for months with all these supplies. The sheer volume of mushrooms strained the limits of even what a magical Bag of Holding could handle.

I suspected that the moment we left this forest, it would revert to an undifferentiated landscape of mushrooms and goblins.