Chapter 1: Letter of Invitation

Chapter 1:
Letter of Invitation

 

A WEEK AFTER I LEARNED where Zenith was, I was still at the inn in Basherant. She was apparently in the Labyrinth City of Rapan, somewhere in the center of the Begaritt Continent, and as much as I wanted to set out immediately, that was far from here. I had no idea how many months it would take to make the journey on foot. It might even take over a year.

Besides, winter would be here soon, and that was a harsh season in the Northern Territories. The snow piled up as high as five meters deep, and while the country cleared local roads to some degree, crossing the border would be difficult. I could use magic to stop the snowfall and thaw the ground, but I didn’t know all the roads, and I couldn’t avert the weather forever.

And so, I was staying put for the time being. Besides, according to Elinalise, Zenith was having a merry old time going dungeon-diving. I suspected she was just saying that to reassure me, but she had said there was no need for me to hurry, and that Paul and Roxy were already headed that way. Paul didn’t inspire much confidence, but if Roxy was headed to my mother, then I could relax for the moment. Better to wait for winter to end before I made a move.

“Alright, let’s do some more training today.”

And so, I started the day with my usual workout routine. Snow or no snow, I could still do my weight training. I’d never stuck with exercise for very long in my previous life, but for whatever reason, my current body was keeping up well.

No point in overthinking it. I should just be grateful I can train like this everyday, I told myself as I changed and headed out to start running.

Today was a holiday, so I’d set myself a slightly difficult course. First, I did a lap around the city. The compacted snow was slippery, raising the risk of slipping and twisting my leg; this would be important adventurer training. Once I finished my lap around the city I headed for the outer wall, a stone construct about four to five meters high, which I used magic to climb. Adventurers sometimes needed to get to higher ground quickly, so I was training for that contingency, too.

I spotted one of the soldiers on lookout. “Oh, good morning!”

“Whoa?! Oh, it’s you, Quagmire. Hard at work, I see! You have the day off today, then?”

“Yeah, I’m training again today.”

“Well, you are a hard worker. Ah, that’s right—fix the wall for us next time, won’t you? I’ll buy you dinner.”

“If you give me permission to grope your daughter’s breasts, I’d be happy to even rebuild your house for you.”

“Hey now…” he started.

“I’m just teasing.”

I greeted the other soldiers on the outer wall, then leapt off on the other side. There, I did another lap around the city’s perimeter. Unlike the city, which was periodically plowed, snow had built up outside, so I had to use fire magic to melt a path I could run on. This was also a part of training. It might seem to be a skill with limited use, but there had been that one time I’d struggled to get through that snow-laden forest.

“Huff… huff…”

Once I finished my lap, I started practicing with the wooden sword I’d carried with me. I knew this wasn’t really necessary for a magician, but I still made it part of my daily routine. It seemed to be largely accepted that magicians were physically powerless, but that didn’t sit right with me. I might not be a swordsman, but there were plenty of occasions when a bit of upper body strength came in handy, like when hauling my luggage. I could always entrust the duty to someone else, but I thought it best to be able to handle it myself.

“Hah! Yah! Ho!”

After finishing my usual sword drills, plus those that Paul and Ghislaine had taught me, I proceeded to simulate a mock battle. I decided to imagine Ruijerd as my opponent today. I was much too slow to be a match for him, of course. I’d never beat him unless I kept training—in fact, I might never beat him at all, no matter how much I trained. But that didn’t bother me. Beating him wasn’t my goal.

Once I was done, I took the same route home.

 

When I made it back to the inn, Elinalise thrust her head out of a second-floor window. “Ah… my, my, it’s you Ru—ah!—deus. Welcome back.”

Something was off about her. Her hands were hooked onto the window ledge, and as her face contorted, her body shook with a rhythm. Moans of, “Mm, mm,” slipped out as she tried to hold in her voice. Plus, her shoulders were completely bare.

“Thank you, Miss Elinalise. Looks like you’re having a lively morning.”

“What? Lively? I-I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking ab—aah!”

I was sure there was a guy inside that room, giving her you-know-what from behind. Opening a window for some fancy kinks when it was this cold outside… Lively, indeed.

“It’s freezing outside, so please be careful not to catch a cold.” I pulled my gaze away from her and went inside, heading toward my room.

It had dawned on me this past week that Elinalise was a massive slut. It had startled me at first, but now, I was used to it. The woman had a man in her room basically every day. Her very existence was a sex crime.

Of course, I didn’t judge her for it. In fact, I’d love to participate if I could. But that wasn’t going to happen, because for the past two years I’d been afflicted with a certain sickness. A sickness of the mind and body. Let’s use a plant bulb as an example. When that plant bulb sees mountains or valleys, it blossoms. Its shoot rises toward the heavens and grows into a stem so strong that rain and wind can’t bring it down, with a magnificent flower at its tip. Then, when the time is right, it spreads its white seeds everywhere. However, my bulb wasn’t growing and its flower wasn’t blossoming.

Ah, screw it, I’ll just say it. I had ED. And no, we’re not talking about the extra dynamic cassette tape. My little man had stopped standing to attention after Eris and I broke up, as I’d found out when a fellow adventurer approached me during the period I was trying to get my name out there. I’d ogled her happily as I took her back to my inn, but my little buddy wouldn’t stand up when it came to it. She ended up leaving in a huff.

I’d done everything I could to fix it. Soldat had even taken me with him to the red-light district, where my heart had pounded as a woman serviced me. Ultimately it was a failure, however. My tulip wouldn’t bloom, but silently drooped, instead. On top of that… no, let’s just stop there.

It had been quite the shock. I’d been an absolute wreck. I’d pulled myself together with time, and tried again, to no avail. My useless friend had remained unusable. I still appreciated the sight of an attractive woman, but no ripples went up and down my spinal cord, and my lower half remained silent. As time went on, I was overcome by a pervasive sense of loneliness and helplessness, and after one too many failures, I gave up. I no longer thought of this as a problem someone else could help me solve. There was no one I liked enough to try. If all my attempts at romance were going to end in betrayal, I was better off just admiring from afar. I didn’t need to hope for anything more than that, even though just getting a taste always left you wanting more. 

All I had to do was make the most of flying solo. I didn’t need comrades. I hated crowds.

Although, lately, I hadn’t even been able to coax my little friend into flying solo… Not that I was all broken up about it, of course!

“Hah…”

I returned to my room. After warming the air with magic, I conjured some hot water and wiped the sweat off my covered body. Then I got changed and stepped out, thinking about grabbing a bite to eat.

“Oh!”

“Oh.”

I ran into Elinalise, who’d just finished her business. The person with his arm wrapped around her shoulder was the same one I’d been working alongside these past few years—Soldat. He immediately went pale the moment he saw my face. “No, it’s not what you think, Rudeus… I had no intention of putting my hands on your woman.”

“No, it’s not what you think, Soldat. She is absolutely not my woman. Besides, you know that mine isn’t in working condition, right?”

“Oh, yeah, that’s right, uh… sorry, for rubbin’ salt in your wounds, then. I didn’t mean to start somethin’. Besides, you made me a lot of money not too long ago.”

“It’s fine,” I assured him. “By the way, was it good?”

“Yeah, it was the best,” he said, face melting into an expression of bliss.

“Tch.” I clicked my tongue in dismay, even though I was the one who asked the question. “Well, you heard him, Miss Elinalise. Good for you.”

“Well, of course it was. Anyone who’s been with me leaves happy.”

“…oh, really.”

I knew she’d already had her fill of numerous other men from Soldat’s party—each of them had come to me with their own apology and boastful story about their tryst. I didn’t really need the apologies, but did they know what their buddies were up to? Wouldn’t someone eventually find out and chaos ensue?

Ah, well…not my problem. I was keeping my nose clear, as I’d done these past two years. I’d done nothing to invite anyone’s ire, and I’d started no fights. In other words…

“Miss Elinalise.”

“Yes, what is it?”

“You’re free to enjoy yourself, but please deal with the aftermath on your own, okay?”

That was right—self-preservation. Soldat and his team had looked out for me, but I wanted nothing to do with the entanglements that issued around other people’s crotches.

“Of course.”

“Hey, what’s that all about?” Based on his expression, Soldat had no idea what we were talking about.

Elinalise planted a kiss on his cheek and guided him down the stairs. “Nothing at all. Come, let’s go have something to eat.”

What a cruel woman.

 

***

 

Elinalise Dragonroad was one of Paul’s former party members. Apparently, she’d teamed up with Roxy to search for Paul’s family in the wake of the Displacement Incident. They’d traveled across the Demon Continent together, and then, Elinalise had made her way alone to the Central Continent, while Roxy went to tell Paul about Zenith’s whereabouts. In other words, if not for Elinalise’s selfish whims, the person with me right now could’ve been Roxy. Dammit.

No—I should be grateful. They could have all gone to Millishion and left me on my own. I could see Roxy once I made it to Begaritt. No need to be impatient.

Elinalise was an S-ranked warrior. The two of us took on an elimination quest together once, and as expected of an S-rank, she was good. Her attack power was a bit lacking, but she was insanely good at tanking. She had to be right in the top tier of warriors out there—though not the best. The best would always be Ruijerd, in my eyes, even if it was a bit unfair to compare her to him.

She had a regal, elven beauty, with radiant gold hair set in magnificent long curls. Her soft demeanor and distinct way with words stroked men’s egos; by gazing right into their eyes, and touching them with little caresses, she disarmed them without even trying. Every little motion she made was primed to seduce, like when she first approached me, and I thought, oh? Has she fallen for me? Her prowess in the bedroom was clearly impressive, too, because almost all the men who spent a night with her were completely exhausted the next day.

That said, she didn’t ignore or condescend to other women. She played the part of an older sister to the younger girls, giving them relationship advice, teaching them how to draw men in, and protecting them in combat. She never tried to seduce a man who already had a partner. You might consider that her way of trying to set boundaries: everything had its time and place. If you overlooked her small breasts, she was perfect.

Of course, her sexual appetites were still insatiable. One by one, she devoured all the single men around her. It was like watching a fuse burn down. You had no idea how long the fuse was, but some day it was going to run out and set off a huge explosion—by which I mean prideful adventurers getting into a lover’s quarrel. Elinalise was charismatic enough to make sure the fallout never escalated into bloodshed, but, as you might expect, she never stayed in one party for very long. She was infamous among the male adventurers of the southern region of the Central Continent, so much so that there was an unspoken rule about not allowing her to join a party unless under special circumstances.

On that note—she was currently partied up with me. “If you’re going to the Begaritt Continent, then I have to make sure you get there safely,” she’d said, and I hadn’t objected. The past two years had taught me realize how difficult it could be to travel alone. Elinalise was skilled in battle, and would be a good partner…except for the part where she would nestle up against me while I was eating, and run her hands all over me. That part was a bit irritating. If not for my ED, I would have loved to return the favor by feeling her up.

“Mister Soldat, you can’t do that. Rudeus is watching.”

“Come on, can’t I? Just a little.”

“My, my, such a naughty boy…”

Currently, she was getting all lovey-dovey with Soldat in front of me. Why were we even eating at the same table? I bet she just wanted to show off. Dammit, it’s not like I’m envious or anything!

Soldat was sweet and caring with Elinalise, as were the rest of his party members. With a reverse harem like that, how was she possibly avoiding any drama? Not that I cared, as long as none of the pitchforks were pointed my way. I kind of wanted to get to the bottom of this before things went sour, but I had very little experience being in this kind of position, and it felt like it would be kicking the hornet’s nest to try.

“Alright then, here you are,” Elinalise said to Soldat. “The money I promised.”

“Gotcha. I have to say, I’m sorry about this—I enjoy our time together so much that getting money for it just feels kinda…”

“Just make sure you don’t get serious about me, and we’ll call it even,” she replied, handing the money over.

So that’s her secret. Almost like a kind of reverse prostitution, I thought. Well, in that case, there shouldn’t be any problems.

…right?

 

***

 

Our lives continued like that for another month. Then, one day, a letter arrived for me. Written on the firmly sealed envelope were the words Ranoa University of Magic.

 

What the heck is this? I thought to myself as I broke the seal and peeked at the contents.

 

To Lord Rudeus Greyrat,

 

Greetings. I am Jenius, the Vice Principal of Ranoa University of Magic.

Recently, the name of Rudeus the Quagmire has gained prominence in the Kingdom of Ranoa. I hear you’re a highly skilled adventure who can cast spells without incantations. On further investigation, I also discovered that you seem to be a pupil of the Water King Magician Roxy.

Have you any desire to polish your incredible magical skills? I’ve made preparations to welcome you as a special student at Ranoa University. As a special student, you would be exempt from tuition as well as class attendance requirements, while having access to the main school library and facilities, to support you conducting your own research.

If you are able to complete one research project within seven years (by the time you graduate), and transfer the rights to your findings over to the University or the Magicians’ Guild, you will be enrolled in the Magicians’ Guild as a C-ranked member. Of course, even if your research bears no significant fruits, you will still be registered as a D-ranked Guild member with the rest of the graduates.

I would deeply appreciate an opportunity to introduce myself to you. I apologize for the abruptness of this request, but ask that you consider my offer.

 

Thank you for your time and consideration,
Jenius Halphas,
Vice Principal of Ranoa University of Magic

 

A special student… in other words, on scholarship? I knew that a Magicians’ Guild existed in this world, but had no idea what they did. I did know, however, of a Thieves’ Guild that sold items on the black market and traded in slaves. Based on that, I assumed the Magicians’ Guild was probably involved with the buying and selling of books on magic and magical research.

But why were they only sending me this letter now? I suppose that even if I did feel like I was at an impasse when it came to my magic, I was more than powerful enough to make it as an adventurer, and had even beaten a Red Wyrm straggler essentially on my own. It might have been weakened, but that didn’t change the fact that I beat it. And winners were the ones who wrote history, after all.

Still, I didn’t see the need to sit through seminars to get me excited about learning. Someone from God-knows-where was inviting me to go God-knows-where for only God-knows-why. This had to be some kind of scam, right? Like that African gold dust routine.

That said, this letter was proof that my efforts these past two years were being recognized. The University of Magic was Roxy’s alma mater, and I was genuinely honored they’d seen fit to reach out to me—which was why I had to verify the letter’s authenticity.

“Miss Elinalise, I’m going to step out to the Adventurers’ Guild for a bit.”

“Oh? Weren’t you taking the day off?” She was grooming her luxurious mane, having taken the day off manhunting for once.

“There’s something I want to look into.”

“Wait a moment. I’ll go with you.” Elinalise set the brush down and stood up. Her hair wasn’t yet perfectly set, but enough that she seemed to deem it permissible.

“I’m not going out to take on quests. I’ll be coming right back.”

“A long time ago, Paul said the same thing before he went off to the Adventurers’ Guild to pick up girls.”

“He did, huh? Well, that does sound like him,” I acknowledged. “What does that have to do with me?”

“If you’re going fishing to hook up, we’ll have better odds with the two of us. Let’s aim for other male-female pairs.”

What was this slut talking about now? “Please stop with the male-female pairs thing… What if they’re lovers? That’s not going to go down well.”

“It’s fine. I can tell if they’re lovers just by looking,” she said.

“I’m not going to pick up girls, so you don’t have to come with me.”

Sex was the only thing she thought about at any given time, though she’d change tracks abruptly when we accepted a request, transforming into a serious female adventurer in the blink of an eye. That dichotomy was probably one of the things that made men fall for her.

“Don’t say that,” Elinalise whined. “Think about it from my perspective! I have to go manhunting because you won’t play with me.”

“I’d be happy to play with you—if you could get my little boy to stand up.”

“I’d love to try, but I can’t have sex with Paul’s son. Also, I promised Roxy I wouldn’t. I don’t want her to hate me.”

What a completely incoherent explanation. Was this woman really just making it all up as she went? Still, I could understand her not wanting Roxy to hate her, and the fact that she felt that way made me unable to hate her, either. How impressive of my God, to even make someone like Elinalise live in fear of her displeasure.

“That’s not my fault,” I said.

“Certainly true. But what’s wrong with picking up girls? All healthy young boys do it.”

“I’m not a healthy boy.”

“My, my, that was well played.”

And so, I somehow wound up taking Elinalise with me as I set off to the Adventurers’ Guild. Not to pick up girls though, okay?

 

***

 

It was already past noon, and there weren’t many adventurers around. Soldat and the rest of Stepped Leader weren’t around, either. Despite being bears, Luster Grizzlies didn’t hibernate in winter, and elimination requests were aplenty.

After scanning the room, I spotted the A-ranked party Cave A Mond. They were a party of magicians with only four members: one magic warrior and three magicians. All of them could use at least intermediate-tier magic or better and their leader was an advanced fire-magic user.

“Yo, Quagmire, on a date today?”

“Yes, my beautiful girlfriend kept nagging me to go out and pick up some girls.”

“Huh?”

The one who addressed me was their leader, Conrad. He was a seasoned adventurer of forty, somber and mustachioed. He’d dropped out of the hunt for the Red Wyrm straggler, but we had an amicable relationship.

“What’s up? Have you finally decided to join our party?” He’d extended the invitation several times now. According to him, offensive magic users who could also use Intermediate-tier healing magic were a rare commodity.

“Hmph. I’m a lone wolf.”

“What are you trying to act all cool for? You’ve already got a party, don’t ya? With that woman over there.”

I glanced back to see Elinalise picking up some young adventurer. Or seducing, more like. I could see the red flush on the man’s face. A beastfolk would have said they could smell his arousal. Judging by the look of him, he hadn’t much experience, and Elinalise had him more confused than turned on.

Well, not that it mattered.

“More importantly, Mister Conrad, I have something I’d like to ask you about.”

“What is it? If it’s something weird, you owe me a fee. You got quite the payday out of beating that straggler, right? Gah, I should’ve gone too. If I’d only known you’d defeat the thing all by yourself…”

“I’ll treat you to something next time,” I promised. “Now, as for what I wanted to ask… You’re from the Ranoa University of Magic, right?”

“Yeah. Dropped out in my fifth year, though.”

I didn’t care whether he was a dropout or not. “I received this letter,” I said, and showed it to him.

“Ahh, a special student. Yeah, they have those.”

“Can you give me more details?”

“At the University, they have guys like you who can use weird magic, and adventurers who’ve made a name for themselves but aren’t associated with the Magicians’ Guild. They’ve got nobles and royalty from other countries too, but they mainly solicit those with incredible magical power. They tell ’em they don’t have to attend classes as long as the University can list them as a student.”

“How come?” I asked.

“Simple. If those guys make a name for themselves in the future, it’s free advertising for the University, right?”

Or so he said. Scholarship students, huh? We’d had those at schools in my former life, though this seemed a little different. Exactly how did this special student status work? At any rate, if they’d invited me based on the information that I could use magic without incantations, then it definitely wasn’t a scam.

“Well, what does the Magicians’ Guild do?”

“They sell scrolls, support the creation of magical implements and stuff. I don’t really know all the details. I mean, I’m a member, but only F-ranked.”

“Ah, that’s right. Don’t they say you’ll receive D-ranked membership if you graduate?”

“Sure, if you graduate,” he said.

The Magicians’ Guild generally supported all activities that related to magic. You qualified for membership if you could at least use beginner magic. The lowest tier of membership was F-rank, and your influence within the guild increased with your rank, allowing you to seek various forms of aid.

Most magic schools made you an E-ranked member of the guild once you graduated. The Magic University was a bit special in that it gave you a D-ranked membership, largely because the University was the heart of the guild itself. Not to mention the possibility of graduating with a C-ranked membership if your research was fruitful.

“What does being C-ranked allow you to do?” I asked.

“Beats me. Fastest way to find out would be to ask the guild yourself, but they don’t have a branch in this town.”

It seemed you weren’t really eligible for the Magicians’ Guild’s aid if you were only F-ranked. The guidelines for advancing through the ranks weren’t as clear as the Adventurers’ Guild’s were, either, meaning that it was mostly rich people or skilled brown-nosers who quickly got promoted.

“Oh, yeah—Quagmire, you didn’t go to school, did ya?”

“I had a private tutor.”

“You must come from quite the wealthy household, then.”

“As you can tell from my last name, I’m from one of Asura’s nobler branch families.”

“Sorry, but what was your last name again?”

“Greyrat. Rudeus Greyrat.”

The name Rudeus the Quagmire was fairly well-known, but my surname wasn’t. I didn’t know Conrad’s family name, either. He’d said it when he first introduced himself, but I didn’t remember.

“Greyrat—the liege lords of Asura, huh. That’s amazin’. What are you doing as a solo adventurer out here then?”

“Well…” I started to say, and then an image of Eris popped up in the back of my mind. Her face, the warmth of that night, the sense of loss I felt the next morning, and the unpleasant memories with Sara—it had been in the wake of Eris’s departure that my little boy stopped being able to stand up.

By the time I realized what was happening, tears were rolling down my cheeks. “H-huh…?”

“Ah… sorry, shouldn’t have asked, everyone has their reasons.”

I’d made him uncomfortable. I meant to forget Eris, but each time something like this happened, I’d be hit by the memories. It was about time I moved on, surely. Eris was quick to get over things. She’d probably forgotten about me long ago. There was no point clinging to those feelings. It’d been so easy for me to cut off my feelings for Sara, so why couldn’t I forget Eris?

No, just stop thinking about it, I told myself.

“Well, anyway, since they went out of their way to welcome you, isn’t it worth going and seeing what they’ve got to offer?”

When Conrad said that, I remembered being Eris’s tutor. Back then, I’d thought I was doing it to save up for attending the University of Magic alongside Sylphie. Boy, that was a trip down memory lane. Sylphie was getting bullied at the time, and I’d been teaching her magic, although at the same time, I felt like my own magical abilities had hit a wall. Back then, all I thought about was honing my skills in pursuit of that goal, and I was still well aware of the importance of improving my abilities. I planned to keep doing so from here on out. Becoming a member of the Magicians’ Guild surely had its benefits. But I still had my family to think about, and I knew from these past couple of years that my current abilities were more than enough for my daily purposes. Unlike a few years ago, I didn’t feel the same urgency to learn anything new. Granted, there was the possibility I’d suddenly run into someone like Orsted again…though he was hardly an opponent you could defeat with just a bit of training. He’d disposed of Ruijerd, who’d lived for several hundred years, with just one hand. If we did cross paths again, I’d be better off avoiding fighting him at all.

“Rather than tagging along behind someone like Paul, why don’t you try doing something for your own sake? Like going to school? You’re old enough to be independent, right?” Elinalise was suddenly standing beside me.

“I’ll have time for that after I go and see my family,” I said.

“Zenith is just fine. You’ll see them again while they’re still alive, that’s enough.”

“But our family was separated…we should at least reunite first.”

“Paul and the others are going to return to Asura, anyway. You can go see them there,” she reasoned.

“But they might continue living in Millishion instead, you know?”

“It’s not the best place for a man with two wives to live.”

Monogamy was one of the teachings of the Millis faith, and the majority of the Holy Country of Millis’s citizens were followers of the faith. She had a point.

“Just be honest—you don’t want to meet with my father, do you?” I accused her.

“No, I don’t,” she said, shrugging her shoulders indifferently. Did she really hate Paul that much? She hadn’t wanted to see him in the first place, but she also had no intention of abandoning her job to deliver me there. Sometimes I really had no idea what she was thinking.

“By the way, Quagmire…” said Conrad.

“Yes, what is it?”

“Isn’t it about time you introduced me to the pretty lady?” He looked at her with a thirsty gaze.

Why was this woman so popular? Well, at any rate, I’d made a decision about the University. It was an attractive proposal, but I was going to pass on enrolling for now.

 

***

 

As I dreamed that same night, I found myself in a pure white room. It was him—that guy again. The mosaic one, from two years ago.

“Yeah, it’s been a while.”

Yeah, I knew it. Man-God.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Nothing. Don’t worry about it.

“I’m not. I’m used to you saying strange things, after all.”

Is that so? Well, it’s been a while since I had this dream, but I don’t feel as disgusted as usual.

“You must’ve gotten used to it, right?”

Dunno. More importantly, I called to you over and over while I was searching for Zenith, you know? Couldn’t you have come to me even once?

“There was a lot happening on my end.”

That so? Well, we found her in the end, anyway. Just feels like I lost a whole two years over it.

“I’m glad that you found your mother, though.”

Yeah. I never dreamed Roxy would be looking for her.

“She is a hard worker, after all.”

She really is. I’m proud of my master. It seems she’s headed for the Begaritt Continent, too. I can’t wait to see her.

“Are you sure? You really want the master you’re so proud of to see how pathetic you look right now?”

Pathetic? Me? Right now?

“Don’t you agree? After Eris ran off, you went through all that trouble to make it with that girl Sara, and then your nether regions wouldn’t play ball. Your magic may have improved a bit, but it’s hit a dead end these past few years. Even your swordsmanship hasn’t gotten much better, despite practicing every day. The only thing that’s really gotten stronger is your body, but is that something you want to brag about? ‘See what an amazing pupil I’ve become’?”

Grrr, you’re really laying into me, aren’t you? Okay, so what are you trying to say?

“Isn’t it important for you to hone your abilities right now? Go to the University of Magic, and you’ll learn so much that your time as an adventurer will pale in comparison.”

What the hell? You running a cram school or something? …wait. Is this what I think it is? Your usual advice?

“Yeah, something like that.”

As always, you beat around the bush and make everything sound fishy.

“Really? But you should listen to what I’m telling you this time. If you go to the Begaritt Continent, you will definitely regret it.”

Regret it? Why?

“I can’t tell you.”

Yeah, sure. Well, it’s not like this is the first time you’ve concealed something from me. You should know your reasoning sounds weak. I want to take things slow too, but only after my family has all been found and gathered in one place.

“That’s why my actual advice is what I’m about to say.”

That’s what I’ve been waiting for. Let’s hear it.

“Rudeus, go forth and enroll at the Ranoa University of Magic. There, you must investigate the Displacement Incident in the Fittoa Region. If you do this, you will be able to regain your abilities and confidence as a man.”

Huh? Seriously? Man-God, are you saying that my erectile dysfunction can be cured at the University?! That’s what you mean, right? Right… Right…

My words left only an echo as my consciousness faded.

 

***

 

I opened my eyes to find Elinalise’s face right beside mine. Dumbfounded, I stared at her in amazement as I recalled the events of the previous night. In a rare turn of events, her manhunting had ended in failure. When day turned to night, she said, “It’s too cold, I can’t sleep,” and slipped into bed with me.

It was true that winter nights in the north were bitterly cold. This was a world with no air conditioners or gas heaters. Good inns had fireplaces in every room or a single magical one that heated the entire building, but this one was cheap. It provided a super thick comforter, but that was it. I used magic to heat the room, so it didn’t really bother me, but Elinalise seemed rather cold. I decided this was one of the demands of the job and welcomed her in.

So here I was, in bed with this beautiful older woman who had no concept of chastity, and yet my little seal remained firmly supine. I tried fiddling with her body while she was asleep to test myself, but got no reaction. This was exactly what I’d dreamed of in my previous life—just having my way with a woman’s body. And I was doing it. I was insanely turned on, but there was no ripple down my spine, no reaction from below.

“Hmmm…”

When I lifted my hands from her, she wrapped herself around me like an octopus. Her body, soft despite its lack of padding, pressed against me. The way she coiled herself around me was so suggestive, and yet, I felt no reaction. Eventually, her breathing grew calm and quiet once more, and my arousal began to fade, leaving an emptiness, a loneliness, and a sense of inferiority.

Tears welled up in my eyes. “So… this will finally go away…”

That was how I quietly came to my decision to attend the University.

 

***

 

Three months later, when the snow began to melt, I announced my departure to Soldat and his group. Although I considered myself a solo adventurer, I’d travelled often with the members of Stepped Leader, and thought farewells were in order. I gathered the members of the party in front of the inn and explained that I was going off to Ranoa. “Everyone… thank you for everything you’ve done for me up until now.”

They all looked a bit desolate as they replied, “Good luck,” and “Be well.” I looked at last toward Soldat, who wasn’t meeting my eyes, and bowed my head.

“Soldat. Thank you for everything.”

“What?”

“I mean, you took really good care of me and I did nothing for you in return…”

Soldat Heckler. Regardless of what he said, he’d looked out for me these last few years. He’d even tried a bunch of different things to help me cure my ED. If it hadn’t been for Zenith, I probably would’ve joined his party.

“I wasn’t lookin’ out for you in particular, so you have nothin’ to return. In fact, you helped me make some cash. Your magic skills are top-notch. The one who should be sayin’ thanks is me.” He gave a vulgar chuckle, but his expression turned awkward and he averted his eyes.

What a tsundere. He was bad with words, but I was pretty sure he’d taken a liking to me. If he really didn’t like me, he wouldn’t have panicked when I saw him and Elinalise together, nor would he be looking so awkward right now. “But, well, good for you. You’re finally gonna get that fixed, right?”

“Nothing’s certain yet.”

“Ah, okay. Well, I’m sure our group will eventually have a reason to head out that way. When that happens, let’s go out for drinks and women again,” Soldat said with a grin, smacking on the back.

Feeling grateful for that parting nudge, I set out for the Ranoa Kingdom.