TAKING MY GIRLFRIEND TO MEET MY PARENTS, PART 5.: 2007/01/28 20:40
Taking My Girlfriend to Meet My Parents, Part 5.
2007/01/28 20:40
My parents took the first shot at me.
I stood at the entrance to the living room.
… I was already reeling.
……
They’re hitting it off…
Y-ko is hitting it off perfectly with my parents…
| DAD: | Don’t just stand there like an idiot, sit down. |
| Y-KO: | Here, give me your cup. I’ll pour you some tea. |
| MOM: | Oh, thank you so much, dear. |
| DAD: | … Do you always make her do this much work, son? |
Absolutely not, Dad!
It’s usually me who works this hard!
… Yeah, that’s right!
She’s telling the truth! She’s telling the truth, but…
… for some reason, even though Y-ko’s being absolutely honest,
my parents keep shooting me these lukewarm glances!
Dammit!!
Don’t stare at me like that!
… Dad!
Were you just thinking, “She’s so well mannered”?!
Why are you giving me a thumbs-up, Mom?!
… And stop mouthing “good job” at me!
… Damn!
This is supposed to be my home field (in a way),
so why do I feel such an oppressive road disadvantage?
Despite my fiercely conflicting emotions, I sat down at the table.
| DAD: | By the way, Y-ko… |
| Y-KO: | Yes? |
| DAD: | What was it about him, anyway? |
| ME: | Grrfh?! Coff, gehoff! |
Come on! What are you playing at, bringing up an embarrassing topic like that?!
I could have choked on my food and died!
Y-ko decided to go out with me because she saw me putting little bookmark slips in my books!
Tell me, what kind of reaction are you planning to give when she drops that bombshell?
You’re kind of enjoying this, aren’t you? You can’t wait for her to say it!
… Okay, Pops, let’s see how you uphold your fatherly image after this one!
| Y-KO: | Well, let’s see… |
| … He’s very nice, and sometimes he does and says things that just electrify me… | |
| DAD: | …… |
| MOM: | …… |
| ME: | …… |
… What a difficult statement to give a reaction to!
Plus, I thought it was the slips that clinched it for me, Y-ko!
| DAD: | Well, er… I hope you’ll keep giving him lots of love. |
| MOM: | Yes, please be good to our boy, Y-ko. |
See? Now you made things all weird!
And for some reason, I’m feeling a bit uncomfortable!
| Y-KO: | Oh no. I can only hope that you will accept me. |
… Ah!
I-I feel like I need to divert the course of this conversation!
I sense danger ahead!
We’re moving in the wrong direction!
| ME: | Oh, that reminds me. Umm, you know… |
| MOM: | So, Y-ko… |
| ME: | Oh yeah! Th-this rice is really good; it reminds me of— |
| MOM: | Which one of you asked the other out? |
| ME: | The rice is… |
| DAD: | Oh, I’m curious about that, too. Who popped the question, son? |
No!
Listen to me!
I’m trying to describe how good the rice is!
| Y-KO: | Well, uh… It’s actually… kind of an embarrassing topic. |
| But it is important to us, so I’d like to keep it a secret… if you don’t mind. |
A real grown woman sure knows how to be awesome!
| MOM: | Don’t you want to see some childhood photo albums of him? |
| DAD: | I bet you’d love to hear all kinds of juicy, embarrassing stories. |
| ME: | What are you people doing…? |
Come on, Mom and Dad…
You’re too old to act like this. Take a page out of Y-ko’s book, and—
| Y-KO: | Well, it was a really beautiful situation. |
| The moon was out, and it was full and bright. He and I had just— | |
| ME: | Y-ko?! |
And now she goes ahead and spills the beans!
I hate grown-ups!
| DAD: | Aha, so he was the one who asked you out first? |
| So tell me, son. You spent about a week writing those lines, didn’t you? | |
| MOM: | And then you practiced them on your own, right? |
| Y-KO: | Huh? You did? |
| ME: | ……! |
I practiced them constantly, and I had the whole situation planned out ten days in advance!
I had several patterns memorized based on different possible answers from Y-ko!
… Is there something wrong with that, dammit?!
| Y-KO: | Well, can you tell me about him as a little boy? |
| DAD: | What do you want, the embarrassing anecdotes or the failures? |
Stop right there, Dad!
Are those the only two choices she gets?!
| DAD: | Well, it’s not like there are any particularly cool stories about him, right, dear? |
| MOM: | Really? I’ve got some. |
Look at that, Dad!
Mom understands how it works!
Tell Y-ko a really impressive tale about me as a lad, Mom!
| MOM: | When they asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up back in kindergarten, he made a big pose and said, “I want to be a superhero!” |
Wasn’t that c-c-? Huh?!
| DAD: | …… |
| Y-KO: | …… |
| ME: | …… |
| MOM: | Oh, but there’s more— |
… More?
| MOM: | —and I want to save Mommy from a giant monster! |
……… Oh dear.
| Y-KO: | That’s so cool! |
| DAD: | What about me? Wasn’t he going to save me, too?! |
| MOM: | Oh, and by the way, this is a photo of him at that age— |
| Y-KO: | Y-you have to copy me some prints of this! |
| MOM: | Of course! I’ve got the negatives saved and everything! |
| DAD: | Honey! Honey! What about me?! |
……… Great.
Is that the only cool story about me you have to tell?
And, Y-ko, you are getting along with them much too well.