Taking My Girlfriend to Meet My Parents, Part 7.

2007/02/12 18:20

So.

The story of the face-to-face meeting of my parents and my girlfriend ends today.

My dad is driving us to the airport in his car.

The conversation naturally turns to reflect on the last few days.

DAD:	How did you like America, Y-ko?
Y-KO:	I had a lot of fun!
	It was great getting to meet you and talk to you.
MOM:	And I’m glad to hear about what this young man’s been getting up to back home.
	We’ll have to meet up in Japan next time.
Y-KO:	Absolutely. I’ll be expecting more childhood stories, too.
	Particularly the embarrassing ones!

She still wants more…

After my poor past has already been stripped bare and savaged…

MOM:	Ha-ha-ha, you can count on it.
	Also, we’ve still got some albums left in Japan to show you.

What’s with a parent’s obsession with photo albums, anyway?

I’ve had enough of my photos being dug out of storage!

… And now Y-ko’s got a whole new hand of embarrassing things she can lord over me!

MOM:	Oh, and if he does anything to you, just e-mail me about it anytime you like.
Y-KO:	Of course! I will!

And when did they exchange e-mail addresses?!

Plus, is it just me, or are they way too friendly?!

I mean, sure, it’s better than the usual mother and daughter-in-law scenario,

but I still don’t like what this relationship is implying… for me!

And Mom!

If anyone’s going to get stuff done to them, chances are it’s going to be me!

—And as the harmless (except to me) conversation continued, we arrived at our destination: the airport.

We put our bags on the counter, and it came time for the (exaggerated) farewells.

DAD:	Good-bye, Y-ko. You take good care of our boy.
MOM:	I hope you can overlook his many faults.
Y-KO:	Huh? Uh… okay.

Wow.

She’s in serious mode for once.

DAD:	Oh, and son, be careful not to forget anything.
MOM:	And brush your teeth before you go to bed.
Y-KO:	Look left and right before you cross the signal, and raise your hand.
ME:	Be serious! Please, treat me like a serious human being!
	And why are you joining in the teasing, Y-ko?!
Y-KO:	Oh, I just thought the situation called for it.
	It worked out nicely, didn’t it?
DAD:	But, Y-ko… it’s not the signal you cross, it’s the street.
Y-KO:	… Good point!

Yes, it may have been a good point!

But is that the best comment a father can make in this situation?!

Your son is being lectured about how to cross the street, and that’s the best you can come up with?

DAD:	Okay, enough of the jokes.

Ahem, he coughed.

DAD:	You stay safe.
MOM:	And don’t forget to call.
ME:	… Right. I’ll see you later.
Y-KO:	Thank you for everything.
ME:	Let’s go.

I waved to my parents and headed through the gate with Y-ko.

… It was a short trip, but it was well worth it.

Y-KO:	You’ve got nice, fun parents.
ME:	I know, right? A bit weird, though.
Y-KO:	Ha-ha-ha. But I can see why you turned out the way you did.
ME:	Is that so?
	… I guess that statement from you makes it worth the trip.
Y-KO:	Plus Papa Sebas is a fun person.
ME:	Papa Sebas?!
Y-KO:	Oops, should I call him Sebas Papa?
	Personally, I think Papa Sebas has a much better ring to it than Sebas Papa.
ME:	Whether Papa comes first or last is not the problem!
	My problem is with you calling my own dad Sebas!
Y-KO:	Okay, got it. I’ll just abbreviate Papa Sebas into Papas, then.
ME:	Papas?! Are you going to kill off my dad?
Y-KO:	If that happens, the question is whether I’m Bianca or Nera…
	By the way, which one did you pick?
ME:	No, that isn’t the question… but to answer your query,
	I’m the type who would prefer to play the game twice and enjoy each side of the story.
Y-KO:	Aaah! I’m going to tell your mother about this!
ME:	About what?!
Y-KO:	Her son is an adulterer!
ME:	I am no such thing!

But for some reason, I feel incredibly guilty!

Should I have picked one or the other?!

Y-KO:	Heh… You will learn to rue this terrible mistake.
ME:	… Okay. Which one should I have picked?
Y-KO:	Huh? Which what?
ME:	Bianca or Nera? Which is the correct choice?

To be perfectly honest, if I was forced to choose one and not the other,

I’d have to go with Bianca…

I guess?

I don’t really know.

Y-KO:	In that case… the answer should be… me.
ME:	…… What?

… Me?

Y-KO:	I don’t care if they’re childhood friends or rich landowners’ daughters.
	You are not allowed to choose any woman aside from me. How’s that?
ME:	… I get the picture.

Yes, I see.

A very bold and cool statement, especially considering it came out of a pointless discussion about video games.

… Well, damn.

Sometimes she just knows how to be cool.

…… Hmm?

Wait a minute.

ME:	Well, you know what that means! I can’t make the jump into girl games now!
Y-KO:	Huh?
ME:	Well, I’m not allowed to choose any woman aside from you, right?
	Even if she’s from a video game.
Y-KO:	…… Umm, I… guess so?
ME:	Oh good! Now I don’t have to worry about cheating on you with 2-D girls.
	And that means you’re going to stop trying to shove those games down my throat!

Yes.

She is all about the erotic games, the girl games, the dating sims.

She keeps trying to force me to play them.

Y-KO:	…… Hmm…
ME:	You want me to choose you, not Bianca or Nera, right?

I put the screws to her.

If I can wring a statement out of her, I win!

Y-KO:

…… I guess I don’t have a choice. I’ll stop pushing those girl games on you.

… Victory!

I felt a wicked, leering grin form behind my face,

just like the kind you’d see on the protagonist of a certain manga about shinigami and notebooks.

Y-KO:

—But in exchange…

… Huh?

In exchange…?

Y-KO:	I said you couldn’t choose another woman but didn’t say you couldn’t choose a man!
	… Oh, I think they’re boarding us now. Let’s go, SuperheroSebas!
ME:	Wipe that evil smile off your face!

That’s not the kind of smile you point at your lover!

That’s the smile the owner of a shinigami’s notebook makes when he announces his victory!

And that’s how we came home!

* Bianca or Nera: The central choice of the game Dragon Quest V: Hand of the Heavenly Bride is whether you will marry your childhood friend Bianca or the wealthy Nera—the ultimate dilemma. By the way, Papas (or Pankraz in the English edition) is the main character’s father, who dies during the game.