site 28: Aria Kurenaino

Thursday, February 25th

The papers, the TV, and the internet had talked about nothing but the death of Dr. Isayuki Hashigami the whole day. According to the news, last night at around 11:00 PM his body had been found covered in blood on the campus of Seimei University. Several hours ago, witnesses had seen a man fleeing from the scene, and the police were continuing their investigation.

And...

The biggest shock to me...

“His scalp had been torn off.” Dr. Hashigami’s trademark long hair had been ripped from his skull, scalp and all, and taken from the scene.

The talk shows on TV had been spending most of their time on this subject in particular. They’d played footage of Dr. Hashigami while he was still alive, while commentators with solemn expressions traded theories about the killer despite the fact that they had no evidence at all.

The debate on the net was more chaotic, with theories ranging from dark conspiracies to random spree killers. People claiming to be students at Seimei appeared on the boards and traded unverifiable gossip about Dr. Hashigami and his rivalries with other professors. It was like someone had poked a beehive.

Why did people enjoy discussing such vulgar things? Just looking at it all made me want to throw up, especially since Dr. Hashigami’s death was something special to me. In my mind, I wondered if it was “my devil” that had killed Dr. Hashigami.

“The Devil’s Ritual...” But my work at the black magic agency never included killing the target. I’d never told my devil to kill someone. I’d never done anything that would cause the target to die... right? I wasn’t sure, and I shuddered.

How much did I know about my devil? All I ever did was sit in my shop and wait for him to talk to me. I’d never seen for myself what he did, and I’d never looked to see what became of the targets.

I thought back to the day I met my devil. I’d met that cruel, gentle devil as I’d stood at the brink of despair.

Three years ago, the most important person in the world to me had died due to medical malpractice at a hospital. There was no way my mind could handle that. Believing my brother was still alive, I secretly took his body from the hospital room and lived with it for a year. But my relatives had found out and shattered my happy illusion. My brother wasn’t the handsome, gentle man who loved me anymore. He was a stinking, dried-up corpse. And when I’d been forced to face this, I ran.

As the despair tore into me, I found myself wandering through the streets of the neighborhood at night. I couldn’t remember where I’d walked. Everything around me melted into the darkness, and I couldn’t tell where I was. It hurt to breathe. I thought that perhaps I’d lost control of my lungs. I even thought of tearing open a hole in my throat to make it easier to breathe. I wasn’t wearing shoes, so my toes had gone numb from the cold. My socks had torn, and my exposed toes were bleeding. There was no one there to help me. And even if there was, I didn’t want help from anyone but my brother.

—I just wanted to disappear. I wanted to go to where my brother was. That was the only thing I thought. My brother was already gone from this world. I’d killed him twice, and now I’d been forced to confront that. There was no reason for me to live anymore.

Instead, I realized that if I died here, then maybe I could go be with my brother. And when I realized that, I felt a lot better.

So when I heard the sound, I was overjoyed to think that God had granted my request. It was the loud, rhythmic sound of a warning bell. Just listening to it made me feel uneasy.

In the darkness of the night, I could see two red lights flashing. It was a small train crossing. There were no people or cars nearby. On the other side of the lowered guard rails, I could see two sets of tracks. I could hear the sound of a train in the distance.

Instinctively, I put my hand on the guard rail. I told myself that all I had to do was go under it. On the other side, I’d find my brother.

At the time, I’d really felt like I’d been saved. I was excited. I was twitching with joy. My heart felt like it was going to burst. I wanted to shout with excitement.

I can still remember it now. I could see the lights of the train in the distance. I started to hear the sound of the warning bells, the beating of my heart, and the sound of the train on the tracks, all in slow motion.

—It was time to end my life.

But just when I ducked down to go under the bar...

〈You have no right to that yet.〉

The voice felt like it came from a long way away, but it also seemed very close. It was hard to tell where it was coming from, but I suddenly gasped and forgot about going under the guard bar. Instead, I looked back behind me. There was no one there.

“Brother?! Is that you, Brother?!” My voice was drowned out by the roar of the yellow train as it passed by an instant later. But even next to the noisy train I could hear every word the voice said, as if it were directly inside my head.

〈Death is something that’s given to the chosen. And you still ain’t got that right.〉

“It’s you, isn’t it, Brother?! Where are you?! Please, let me see you!” I shouted to make myself heard over the passing train.

〈Nope. I ain’t your brother. So don’t go thinking I am.〉 The voice was a man’s low, unpleasant whisper.

This wasn’t my brother’s voice. My brother’s voice wasn’t ugly like this. The two voices were nothing alike. This voice was something more terrifying. When I realized that, my whole body started to get goosebumps. At some point I’d begun to shake.

The train passed, and the warning bells stopped. The guard bar slowly rose. All that was left was the silence and darkness.

But I couldn’t move a step away. “I’m hearing things again, aren’t I?” That’s what I tried to tell myself. Just like I’d imagined the voice of my brother when he was already a mummy, now I was imagining the voice of a different man, one I’d never met. I was insane, so it was certainly possible.

〈This ain’t a hallucination.〉 The voice wouldn’t let me escape from reality that easily. 〈Don’t try to make me out to be a part of you. I’m my own creature.〉

I was talking with it. The cold wind blew through my hair. It felt like someone was breathing onto the nape of my neck, and I held myself tight.

“Then... you’re...”

In my mind, I repeated to myself what the voice had just said. Death is given to those chosen for it. Then the speaker was—

As someone who knew about black magic, there was one possibility that came to mind. “You’re a devil, aren’t you?”

〈...〉

“You’re a devil, right?”

〈Yeah, that’s right,〉 the voice answered.

“Heheh... heheheh... I knew it. You’re my devil. My own, personal devil...” I realized that this was my punishment for my sins. I wasn’t going to be allowed to die. I wasn’t going to be allowed to see my brother again. This was the fate of an insane little sister who’d defiled her brother’s body. I would be forced to suffer that pain until being chosen gave me the “right” to die, and only then could I see my brother again.

That’s why I had decided not to die. No, more precisely, in that moment, at that crossing, the girl named Ria Minase died at the hands of that devil, and I was reborn as Aria Kurenaino. Ever since then, it had been my devil that kept me alive. He wasn’t my master, nor I his. Perhaps it was better to say that we were only bound by a contract. That’s why we didn’t interact more than necessary.

For the past two years, I’d never even thought about what the devil was doing when it wasn’t with me. Was it possible for “my devil” to actually kill anyone?

I left my home earlier than usual and walked through the rain to the House of Crimson. When I got there, it felt colder than usual, and I was astonished.

I felt a presence.

“You’re here, aren’t you?” I asked, fearfully.

〈Yup.〉

I hadn’t expected the devil to be waiting for me. That had never happened before. And now of all times, too. Perhaps it had read my mind and realized my doubts. Or had it decided to test me, on a whim? To see whether I was worthy of making a contract with it. If I got a single answer wrong, the devil would show me no mercy.

I took off my coat and started to think about what to do.

〈You know Isayuki Hashigami’s dead?〉

I almost shouted in surprise. I hadn’t expected the devil to bring it up, either. It felt like even if I lied, he’d be able to tell from the way I moved and acted that I wasn’t telling the truth. So I sat down in my usual spot in the shop and decided to tell him the truth.

“Did you do that?”

〈Hmph. That ain’t funny.〉 The demon’s dry chuckle echoed in my mind.

It was enough to make me shiver. “Really?”

〈What, did you think I did it? Did it scare you so much you pissed your pants?〉

“The contract we made said that you wouldn’t kill anyone.”

〈The contract said I wouldn’t tell you what I did.〉

There was no way I could out-argue a devil. I was even afraid I might anger it. This wasn’t someone I could open up to.

I could hear the devil click his tongue in aggravation. 〈Don’t you go freaking out on me. Lately, you’d finally started to get a hold of your damn self. Are you going back to who you used to be? ‘Cause if you piss me off too much—〉 The devil suddenly fell silent.

“What’s wrong?”

There was no answer. Only the silence lingered.

I wondered where he’d went, but I could still sense his presence in the shop. I squeezed Ahriman’s head — that was the doll I was holding — and held my breath.

Suddenly the bulb from the antique light stand exploded with a loud burst.

“Eeyah!” I quickly moved to shield my face with Ahriman. I looked and saw tiny fragments of broken light bulb glass on the floor.

This was the power of “my devil.” This was the first time I’d seen it for myself. All he’d ever done before was talk to me.

For the first time, I saw his power, and the terror was enough that I could barely move. I couldn’t stand up from my chair. Had I gone in too deep? But the devil...

〈I hadn’t done anything to him yet,〉 he said. 〈I was willing to do it, but someone got to him ahead of me. Something doesn’t feel right about all this. If somebody’s trying to set me up... then I have to figure out what I’m going to do about that.〉 The devil’s voice was filled with anger.

His anger wasn’t directed towards me. It was directed at some unseen power that even a devil hadn’t been able to predict. Perhaps the two of us had gotten involved in something very complicated. If I’d known this was going to happen, perhaps I would’ve been more careful when a bloody ball of hair showed up in my mailbox.

〈You’re gonna help me, too. If you refuse, the next thing that explodes is gonna be your head. Got it?〉

I glanced at the shattered light stand, licked my dry lips, and slowly nodded. “I understand. No one can be allowed to find out about your existence, after all.”

You couldn’t trust a devil, but I couldn’t afford to lose my partner. I wasn’t going to let anyone else have him. Until he gave me the death I longed for—