Chapter 7: An Annoying Do-or-Die

Chapter 7:
An Annoying Do-or-Die

 

HOW DID I END UP FIGHTING face-to-face in a universe where spaceships fly around with incredible firepower? I blamed Balthazar, along with that damned imperial army for making such a stupid ship. Like seriously, what the f*rk.

“Master Hiro, we’ll be docking soon,” Mimi informed me. “Enemy forces seem to be focused away from the hangar, so you won’t have to worry immediately. But please be careful.”

“Will do.”

Even if there were enemies right outside, they wouldn’t be able to destroy my power armor without some strong-ass weapons. Power armor was my favorite piece of gear, focused on bulk and firepower. Anti-laser, anti-corrosive, and quite bulletproof, the Class-III armor displayed incredible defense against all forms of attack. When the going got tough, I could even deploy shields to bolster its defenses.

“I will protect you, Master. Please, leave them to me.” Mei seemed almost excited.

I mean, she looked just as cool and collected as usual. Her tone of voice wasn’t exactly bubbly, either. But I could tell from her aura that she was raring and ready to go. Okay, you’re ready: I get it. Can you stop swinging that laser launcher around, though? That’s not how you use it.

The reason Mei could even use a laser launcher meant for power armor was because her generator was set up to supply energy to the weapon. Like a suit of power armor, she was equipped with a micro-generator. Hers had even more output than power armor, though, so she could use heavy armaments without needing to wear the armor. The power cable that energized the laser launcher extended from her hip, by the way. Was there an outlet there? I never saw anything like that when I saw her naked.

Weird.

Just then, the ship rocked slightly. It seemed we had landed.

“We’ve docked,” Elma announced. “I know we should put our all into our work, but you only have one life. Don’t waste it.”

“Aye aye, ma’am.”

“Also, evade a noble’s sword at all costs. It’ll cut right through your power armor.”

“Huh?!” Hold up wait a minute! Nobody told me that! Is it too late to change my mind?!

“Also,” Elma repeated, “be careful. Nobles are often equipped with cybernetics that greatly increase their information-processing abilities.”

“Define careful. And what’s the danger to me from that, specifically?”

“Basically, they have insane reaction time. They can deflect lasers with their swords and even fling them back at you.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me…”

For real? They deflect lasers and fling them back? What are these people, J*di? I don’t remember any cybernetic J*di, not that I’m all that knowledgeable about that franchise.

“But,” Elma continued, “they do have trouble keeping it up for a long time due to the physical strain on their bodies. You can do the same thing, right? That’s why I thought you were a noble at first.”

“I can? Oh, yeah, I can…”

She means that thing where everything slows down when I hold my breath, right? Okay, so it must be the same thing. Apparently, it looks like I’m firing at super-high speeds when I do that.

“Well, no matter how fast a noble is, he only has one sword. No problem.” With that, I showed off today’s weapons.

I was equipped with two power armor-grade split lasers, which you could say were totally overpowered in anti-personnel combat. These babies shot twelve rounds at once, all just as powerful as any infantryman’s laser rifle. Basically, they were shotguns in laser form. Having two at once meant I could shoot twenty-four lasers simultaneously.

Shot for shot, the laser launcher was stronger, but it was too big for me to swing around in a small space while wearing power armor. In a closed space, the double split lasers were much easier to handle.

“Okay, we’re going in,” I declared. “Mimi, let Dalenwald’s crew know not to shoot me. Got it?”

“Understood! Be careful!”

“I will handle navigation,” Mei told me.

“Awesome, thank you. Let’s go!” We opened the hatch and leapt out of the Krishna.

It was a little far from the hangar to where enemies were deployed, so I ran, my armor loudly clanking the whole way. The sound may have been dull, but I was even faster than when I was unencumbered. The shock absorbers and artificial muscles on the legs were working quite well, indeed.

But Mei ran further ahead of me, her prim and clean maid clothing fluttering as she went with her hefty laser launcher in hand. What an unbelievable sight! Not even in B-movies would you see a combination like us: an evil-looking guy with power-type power armor and a heavily armed maid. What a dynamic duo.

“The battlefield is up ahead and to the left.”

“Let’s charge in. I’ll go out in front and put up a shield.”

“Understood. Then I shall watch for an opening and mow them down,” Mei answered as we turned left.

There, we saw soldiers wearing body armor up against maids and butlers, both sides in heated battle behind their respective barricades. Oh, that’s right. The crew here are dressed like servants. What a surreal sight.

But the maid/butler allied forces were being pushed back by the armored soldiers. On closer inspection, some enemies were wearing power armor as well.

“Power armor?!” One enemy soldier shouted upon seeing me. “I thought they didn’t have any deployed!” They seemed shocked by my sudden appearance. The maids and butlers turned around, equally surprised. I didn’t mean to scare you guys, sorry. Just…passing through.

“Raaaagh!” I used the suit’s jump thrusters to fly overhead, leaping into the space between barricades. The enemy soldiers immediately recovered from their astonishment and fired at me with laser rifles, but my super-heavy power armor—the Rikishi Mk. III—was unfazed by mere laser rifle fire.

I didn’t just let them fire at me unopposed. I wildly fired both split lasers at the soldiers hiding behind their barricade. One split laser gun had the firepower of twelve enemies, so with two of them, I wielded the power of twenty-four.

“Whoooooa!”

“Damn it, this is a mess! Barst, suppress that giant oaf!” the apparent enemy commander screamed, prompting an enemy to jump over the barricade and run my way.

Hmm. Middleweight, standard power armor. It’s probably military grade. Against an enemy without power armor, it would have ample defense and mobility. Perfectly acceptable firepower, too. But that won’t beat me. Mobility means nothing in a small space like this. When it comes to face-to-face battles on spaceships, what you really want from power armor is overwhelming strength and defense.

“Ahup!” As the enemy charged in, I activated my shields and went for a high-speed shoulder tackle. This was the Rikishi Mk. III’s killer move: the Buchikamashi function.

“Gah!” The enemy’s power armor was blown away, smashing the barricade behind him and taking his friends down with him like bowling pins. They were clearly shaken, obviously not expecting one blow to take out their power armor.

“Mei!”

“I will handle it.” On my signal, Mei leapt forward and joined me in mowing down the remaining enemies with her laser launcher.

Mei’s really incredible, for real. She handles that heavy launcher like it’s nothing, easily obliterating enemy and barricade alike with focused fire. You would think that shooting from the hip like that would make it hard to aim, but her shots were wonderfully accurate.

“Charge!!!” I ordered.

“Sir!” Mei replied.

I charged into enemy lines, kicking aside the half-destroyed barricade. I then used my two split lasers, the Rikishi Mk. III’s own shoulder lasers, and my own two fists to deal with the remaining forces. Humans were simply too powerless in the face of power armor’s overwhelming defense and firepower.

“Haaah!” Meanwhile, the fragile-only-at-a-glance Mei swung her power armor-sized laser launcher with ease, blowing away armored men like leaves. I heard some pretty awful rips and cracks.

“Damn iiiiiiit!”

“Hmph!!!” I grunted.

“Urk…!”

I stomped on the enemy power armor as he tried to stand back up, activating the Shiko impact amplification device and crushing his chest piece to bits. His life was in real danger now, but neutralizing him was my only choice as long as he still wanted to fight.

This was a life-or-death battle.

Come to think of it, I really am just killing people without a second thought. Okay, don’t think too deeply about it. Just think about saving Chris and killing Balthazar.

“Let’s keep going!”

“Yes.”

After destroying the enemies and their barricade, we left cleanup work to the maids and butlers so we could continue. I just hope things go smoothly from here.

 

***

 

We’d only gone a little further in before we came to a halt. The path ahead of us was completely stained with dark, red blood.

“This is just…” I was at a loss.

“They’ve been massacred.”

The formerly white, now crimson corridor was littered with severed human body parts. The gory sight almost made me vomit, but my power armor’s vomit suppression function stopped it. Yet the roiling in my stomach did not stop. We passed through, careful not to step on any corpses.

“Did a noble’s sword do all this…?” I asked. “I sure don’t wanna end up like that.”

“Worry not,” Mei reassured me. “As long as I am here, I swear that such a fate will not befall you.” I appreciated how reliable she was, but I did not want to see her cut apart like that either. I’d better finish this as best I can.

“Also, that location showed traces of lasers on the ceiling and walls. I believe that the enemy does indeed have cybernetic implants,” she added.

“That’s a pain. But hey, there’s no way they can defend against two split lasers at once.”

You might be able to predict a laser’s path based on where the enemy’s barrel is pointed if they use laser guns or rifles, but a split laser sensed how hot its polarizing lens was and made minute adjustments to its firing angle with each shot. Besides, one or two swords alone couldn’t protect you from twenty-four shots at once. Lasers shot literally at the speed of light, so once they were fired, you couldn’t dodge them.

It’s cool, it’s cool. Just show that sword-flailing heathen what modern civilization is capable of! Ha ha ha!!!

“I hear the sound of swords clashing ahead.”

“Let’s hurry. Actually…Mei, you lead the way. You’re faster than me, right?”

“Yes. Understood.”

Mei agreed and ran down the corridor at incredible speed. Why is the corridor dented slightly where she just ran? Is she that fast? I knew her specs based on the catalog, but it was a real shock to witness her power up close and personal for the first time. And she had a specialized fighting program, too. Holy crap. I don’t think I could beat her in a fight even with my power armor.

While I ran, clanking and clunking along the way, my parabolic sensors picked up something like a laser launcher firing. Mei must have engaged the enemy. Red light ran across the open door in front of me. She was really letting them have it. Was the battle up there not finished yet?

I peeked inside the room to size up the situation before charging in. It seemed to be a large foyer where Count Dalenwald stood ready with his sword, alongside Chris and their subordinates. Count Dalenwald had some cuts here and there, making for a sad sight. But fortunately, he didn’t seem to have lost any body parts.

And in front of them, Mei was in heated battle with many foes.

“You damned sex toy!” one of them shouted.

“Your remarks may be true, but I believe you should cease making them. They only depict you in a negative light.”

While a man with a sword screamed at her, Mei remained as calm as ever and continued to launch lasers at him. The lasers, set to spread mode, swarmed toward the man and…didn’t hit him? His two swords deflected them. Huh…?

The man facing Mei held a longsword in his right hand and a short one in his left, deflecting any lasers that were about to hit him and evading the rest with ease. You’re kidding, right? He really is a J*di!

“Mei, fire again. We’ll suppress him with crossfire.”

“Understood.” Upon Mei’s confirmation, I leapt into the foyer where the battle—huh?!

“Hngh!” The sword-wielding man grunted, somehow closing in on me as soon as I jumped in.

“Gah!” I reflexively tried to smack him with my split laser gun, but incredibly, he blocked the strike and jumped back. While he was at it, he sliced the gun clean in two with his dagger. “You little…” I spat. “How dare you cleave my split laser?!”

“Hngh!” He grunted again. I discarded my cleaved split laser and used the one still in my left hand, along with my two shoulder lasers, to fire away at this damned dual-wielding menace. “Y-you dare turn such brutish weapons upon a nobleman?!” he growled.

“Why should I care, jerkoff?!” I continued my merciless laser fire, putting the man on the defensive. I may have lost one split laser, but with my shoulder cannons in the mix, I still had the power of about fourteen men. “Raaah! Diiiiiiie!!!”

Shooting from a distance meant that my lasers would spread out more, so I maintained adequate distance while still staying close enough to shower him with laser fire. Tch! This guy’s even got a portable shield generator! So many of my lasers should be direct hits, but they haven’t so much as singed him!

Not that I cared. No matter how high capacity your shield device, it had to run out of juice eventually. If my first or second shots didn’t hit him, then maybe my third, fourth, tenth, or twentieth shot would!

“You just gonna watch?! Help me shoot!” I screamed at Count Dalenwald’s maids and butlers, who held lasers but stood in shock at what was going on. Mei had shifted her laser launcher into focus mode and was taking carefully aimed shots at the dual-wielder. Laser launchers had incredible strength when focused—one shot would easily exhaust the man’s shields. Nice! Now that’s the spirit.

“Damn it!” Exposed to this focused fire, there was a pop as the man’s portable shield ran out and exploded. Or did he put up a smokescreen? He was hidden by white smoke, which spread and filled the room at great speed. I see… So he’s trying to attenuate the lasers while also making it harder for us to see. That’s a smart move.

But it was pointless. I held my breath and lifted my arm in slowed time, aiming carefully for my mark.

“Hiyaaah!”

“Ack!” The split laser, thrown by my power armor’s overwhelming strength, smashed perfectly into the dual-wielder as he tried to dash for Count Dalenwald.

Though he used an anti-laser smokescreen and made it harder to see, neither of those made things too much harder for me when I wore my power armor. Power armor didn’t just have light sensors; it also had infrared and other such high-capacity sensors installed. A simple smokescreen couldn’t blind me.

I erected my shields and clunked on over to the fallen dual-wielder.

“Fool!” He noticed my approach and tried to slice me with his longsword, but it was deflected by my shields. The nobles’ swords were damn sharp, but he wouldn’t be able to get through my shield—not without either exhausting its power with a laser or missile hit, or piercing it with the high kinetic energy of flak shrapnel.

No matter how sharp his sword or fast his swings, as long as this guy didn’t have cybernetic implants or cyborg parts, his slashes couldn’t hurt me. I was a little afraid that he might be able to cut my shield, but he couldn’t. Thank God for that one.

“Right back at you, fool!” I grabbed the dual-wielder’s wrist. He immediately tried to cut my arm off with his left-hand dagger, but it was too late.

“Aieeeeeeee!” He screamed and began to tremble. I had activated the high-pressure electric shock devices installed in both hands of my power armor, the Harite function—more commonly known as the Rikishi Collider in Stella Online. If a human without power armor got hit by this, they were done for. If it didn’t kill them outright, they would at least faint.

“Haaah…” Smoke rose slightly from the man’s body as he collapsed.

“Strip him of his gear,” I ordered.

“Yes.” Mei ran over and kicked the dual-wielder’s swords away from him. She also tossed aside the strange devices attached to his mantle and other body parts. I didn’t know what any of them were, but if Mei took them, then they must’ve been dangerous.

“So, should we kill the guy?” I asked Count Dalenwald as I gently placed my foot on the man’s head, ready to crush it into dust at the count’s command. He must have been that Balthazar guy. He is, right? Please tell me he is.

“Arrest that man.” Count Dalenwald’s stern expression did not falter as he gestured with his eyes to the maids and butlers around him. The butlers rushed over with what looked like a collar. They placed it around the dual-wielder’s neck and carried him off somewhere.

Meanwhile, the maids recovered the man’s swords and brought them over to me. What do you want me to do with them?

“A pity that you’ve sullied our duel,” said Count Dalenwald, “but in the end, you and that doll defeated him. As such, you will receive his swords.”

“I don’t get it. Mei, what the hell is going on?”

“Noble feuds can be settled in many ways, but I believe that Count Dalenwald and his son Balthazar have chosen a duel to decide their ultimate fate. We interfered in their duel, and by assisting him, we have defeated Balthazar. This means that Count Dalenwald has won, and that he has the power to choose Balthazar’s fate. Also, it is common sense for the winner of a duel between nobles to take the loser’s weapons as a token of pride. Disappointed by our interference, Count Dalenwald does not feel it is right to take Balthazar’s weapons. Instead, he wishes to give them to you, the true victor.”

“Uh-huh… That’s a bit too much to process. Basically, I can have these swords?”

“Yes, I believe so.”

“Okay.”

If Mei said it was fine, then it must be fine, right? With that, I accepted the two swords. My power armor must have made it look awfully strange. A sumo fighter holding Western-style swords was just too incongruous. Maybe it would look better if I had a super-long nodachi or something.

“What are you gonna do about him?” I asked.

“He will receive proper punishment,” Count Dalenwald said curtly and turned around to walk away.

The maids tending to his wounds rushed to follow him. After seeing him off, I recovered my two split lasers—the one sliced in half, and the one I threw at Balthazar. That damned dual-wielder… How could you do that to my beloved gun?! I cursed him mentally and affixed the two swords to the back of my power armor. The power armor could hold weapons on its back, powered by some mysterious, magical force.

Nah, I’m just kidding. It was actually equipped with automatic weapon mounts. They just didn’t stand out in-game, so it looked like they were floating behind you. Most of this universe’s tactical armor had similar technology, but it was heavy. Besides, I usually only walked around with laser guns.

I held my literally split gun in both hands and wondered how we’d clean all this up. Meanwhile, Chris approached me and greeted me.

“Well done,” she congratulated.

“You too, Chris. Are you hurt at all?”

“No, sir.”

I then noticed something hanging from Chris’ hip. It was a little too big to be called a knife. A self-defense dagger, perhaps? “I can’t give you a pat on the head when I’m wearing power armor. Anyway, glad to see you’re safe.”

“It’s thanks to you that I didn’t have to use this kaiken dagger.”

“I’m, uh…not gonna ask how you would’ve used it.”

Assuming the kaiken daggers here were like the ones I knew, they were used for self-defense as well as a way for women to commit suicide to protect their pride and dignity. If Count Dalenwald had lost and I hadn’t come to help, then Chris might have had to use it on herself. It’s a damn good thing I was here.

“Oh, I’d better contact the girls,” I said and switched on my comms. “Elma, Mimi, everything’s okay over here. Balthazar is…well, not dead, but dealt with. Count Dalenwald put some kind of collar on him and took him away, so we should be good.”

“Understood,” Elma replied. “So, you didn’t kill him?”

“I kinda interrupted them in the middle of a duel. I used my power armor’s electric attack, Balthazar fainted, and they arrested him. Count Dalenwald told me to let him live, so I did just that.”

“I see. Are you hurt at all?”

“Nope, but one of my split lasers did get cut clean in half.”

“That’s a shame but be glad it was the only thing you lost. Better than an arm, a leg, or your stomach, right?”

“No kidding.” If that sword was sharp enough to cut my gun in half with one swing, then it might really be able to sever my power armor. It was definitely sharper than any blade I knew. Thank god for shields!

“Make sure you come back safe, please,” Mimi chimed in.

“For sure. Let’s eat something good tonight! We’ll finally get a well-earned rest.”

“Great!”

Her excited voice reminded me of something. “Oh, yeah. Chris, do you wanna come to our ship? We’re gonna have a job-well-done party now that the Balthazar business is finished.”

“A party? That sounds lovely. I’d love to come!”

“I say ‘party,’ but it’s probably just gonna involve us having our automatic cooker make some party food. But do feel free to come along.”

“Okay. I’ll do my best to convince my grandfather.” Chris wrung her hands energetically. Were Mimi’s mannerisms infecting her? I guess they did spend a lot of time together.

“By the way, what’s happening with the battle?” I asked Elma.

“They know Balthazar went down, so it looks like it’s over. Most of the enemy surrendered or ran away.”

“Gotcha. I’ll make my way back now. Chris, we’re docked in your hangar, so come on over when you get permission.”

“Understood. I will ask him soon.”

“Mei, can you guard Chris?” I asked.

“Very well.”

I figured Balthazar’s defeat would be the end of all this, but I had Mei stick with her just in case. She also had maids alongside her with laser guns and rifles, but it never hurt to be extra careful. I handed my intact split laser to Mei and took the cumbersome laser launcher back with me to the ship.

I remained wary of any battles still going on along the way back, but it seemed like the invading enemy soldiers had been defeated, so I could rest easy for now.

“Don’t take things too easy, Hiro,” Elma warned me.

I had let my guard down now that the big bad was defeated. Either I was restless, or I was too lax. I’d better tighten up, I thought. They say you shouldn’t let your guard down just because you’ve won.

I clanked all through the halls, glancing toward the ship’s maids and butlers as I headed toward the flagship’s hangar. The flagship’s carrier-borne planes were returning one by one, as well. Some made it back without losing their shields, but some were so beaten up that I was shocked that they were still intact.

They were the most standard of imperial small battleships, with two weapon mounts capable of equipping small laser cannons or multi-cannons, along with two seeker missile pods. The ships were fast and highly maneuverable. Their shields and plating weren’t great, but they were good ships overall. On the other hand, their cruising ability and cargo capacity were too inadequate for a merc to use. Some people did favor them; they looked cool, after all. Very battleship chic.

My Krishna was twice as big as them. It still qualified as a small craft, but it was pretty close to medium—not that it was comparable to them in capability.

I passed through the hangar, which was bustling with crew members resupplying, maintenance, and rescuing injured pilots, as I returned to the Krishna. I certainly appreciated people giving me a wide berth, given my power armor and huge laser launcher. After climbing the ladder and opening the hatch, I was aboard the ship, where Mimi awaited me.

“There you are!”

“I’m back. Here, let me get this power armor off real quick.”

“Okay!” Mimi sounded casual, but she was following close behind me. Are you worried? I’m not hurt or anything.

After arriving in our cargo hold, I placed the laser launcher into the weapon rack in the corner, threw the broken split laser into the junk box, and stripped off the power armor.

“Ah, sweet freedom.”

“You must be tired after all that!” Mimi quickly offered me a damp towel, which I accepted and used to wipe the sweat from my face and neck. The power armor was air conditioned, but sometimes, you just gotta sweat.

“Thanks. Oh, check these out.” I showed Mimi the pair of Balthazar’s swords mounted on the back of my power armor.

“Swords? Those are the ones carried by nobility, aren’t they?”

“Yep. Count Dalenwald gave them to me after Mei and I beat the tar out of Balthazar.”

“Is it really so easy to get them…?” Mimi was at a loss. Yeah, I can understand that. But they’re mine now! I had no reason to refuse them, and Mei said it was fine, so why not?

“I dunno, but he did give them to me.”

“I-I see…”

Despite her confusion, Mimi was very interested in swords. They were a status symbol of imperial nobles to her, something that she could only dream of seeing. To compare it to Japanese sensibilities…they’re kind of like a Diet member’s badge? Sort of…? Anyway, it’s something an ordinary person would never get their hands on.

“Wanna hold one?” I offered.

“Are you sure?”

“Why not? Oh, but they’re sharp as hell, so be very careful.”

“Okay!”

I handed Mimi the dagger and took the long one for myself. It was thinner than I’d thought, and much more so than the one Serena carried around. Were they equally sharp? I couldn’t exactly compare them. It was double-edged, so the blade wasn’t very wide, and the tip was super sharp.

The sword likely emphasized lightness and agility over raw power. Not that sharpness was especially influenced by its width, but a light sword probably had the advantage in that regard, right?

“It’s quite heavy!” Mimi noted.

“Is it?” I sheathed the longsword and traded with her. Compared to the longsword, this one had a thicker blade. It seemed sharp, too…but it looked to be more sturdy than anything else. If I had to guess, it was less an offensive weapon and more of a tool.

“What are you doing?” came an exasperated voice. I turned to the cargo hold and found one annoyed-looking Elma, so I raised the dagger for her to see.

“Just checking out our loot,” I replied.

“Loot…? Huh? Did you earn that?”

“Yeah. I don’t really get it, but we beat up Balthazar and saved Count Dalenwald, and he let us have them.”

“Wow. That easy, huh?” Elma grumbled to herself, apparently deep in thought.

“Should I not have accepted it?”

“That’s not it, but…meh. If they need anything, they’ll let you know. Anyway, we gotta get ready for the party, right? Put those things away and start getting ready. Hiro, go take a shower.”

“Okay!”

“Aight!”

Obeying Elma’s command, we sheathed the swords and threw them into the weapon case before getting to our own business. Mimi and Elma were bringing up food and drinks from the cargo room, and it was up to me to go bathe like a good boy.

Once I was done with that, it would be time for a victory party!