Chapter 3: Thieves Without Taste

Late at night, we changed into plain clothes, covered our faces, and lay outside a nobleman’s estate near the recruit camp. Today was supposed to be the recruits’ monthly day off, but Carlson had dragged the whole squad out, saying we were going to do “special training.”

“The content of this special training is: each of you must steal something from the estate. Those who come out empty-handed will have extra training back at camp. I just borrowed two purebred hunting dogs yesterday, and they ’re for the ones who run out empty-handed, heh heh…” Looking at the sly smile on the squad leader’s face, everyone who had suffered at his hands felt a chill in their hearts.

“Remember, if you get caught, today is a day off. Your personal theft has nothing to do with me, your squad leader.” Looking at his despicable smiling face, we all felt betrayed.

“Alright, start the operation.”

Dakla and I climbed over the fence and crept close to the wine cellar from the side. Under the night sky, the estate was peaceful and serene, like a sleeping youth breathing steadily in the moonlight.

“Stooop thieeef!” Carlson’s harsh shout suddenly came from behind us, and immediately chaos broke out throughout the estate. The recruits who were stealing as a group were so frightened by this sudden incident that they didn’t know what to do. In the panic, I could still remember my mission, so I casually grabbed a bottle and turned to run.

“There’s a thief outside the wine cellar!” Carlson stood on a hill outside the estate and shouted, pointing at me. Then quite a few farmers and servants holding torches rushed out behind me. At that moment, I wished I could stuff Carlson into the bottle in my hand.

“There’s a thief behind the laundry room!” “There’s a thief in the kitchen!” “There’s still one lying on the wall!” “Two are running west!” … The vicious superior betrayed each of his subordinates one by one. How did he manage to see so clearly on such a dark night?

After more than two months of long-distance running training, those brave farmers originally chasing behind me had no chance of getting close to us. But because the farmers lived scattered near the estate and knew the terrain well, plus that damned Carlson was “directing things so well” outside, Roll, Rama, Gerard, and his brother Rodrick—who came from a family of professional soldiers—and I soon fell into their encirclement. We charged left and right but could no longer get free.

As the torches around us drew closer and closer and the circle of encirclement got smaller and smaller, I could already see the angry expressions on the faces of the farmers closing in.

“Should we… give their things back? They… wouldn’t do anything to us, right?” Roll waved the ladies’ underwear in his hand and quietly asked for our opinion while running. I pictured him being mistaken for a pervert and getting his bones broken.

“In my hand… huff… there’s only half a roasted lamb leg left.” Rama wiped the grease from the corner of his mouth and said between heavy breaths.

“Brothers, no matter who gets out, remember this: it was that perverted Captain Carlson who got us into this mess. Whoever gets out must take revenge for the ones who don’t!” Gerard said fiercely.

I took advantage of the chaos to taste the wine I had stolen. It was wild grape wine that had been aged for about three years, and it tasted good. If it had fermented a little longer, the aroma would have been richer. What a pity, what a pity.

Just as the five of us were falling into despair, a neigh suddenly came from the stable. Then I saw a black figure riding a black horse charge out. Behind him followed a dozen or so fine horses, scattering the crowd chasing us, and then he charged toward the densest cluster of torches gathered to our left front. Whether it was timing or direction, this heaven-sent savior handled it perfectly: he chose to appear at the moment when the situation was clear and everyone’s attention was drawn to the five of us, and the point he chose to charge was exactly the place with complicated terrain, crowded people, and the greatest chance of causing chaos. This one person with a dozen horses swept through the entire estate like a whirlwind, weaving back and forth at perfect moments. The angry crowd scattered and fled before the horse hooves. The scene that had been united in shared anger turned into complete disorder. The important thing was, his superb riding skills kept the whole herd under good control. While successfully scattering the encircling crowd, he also didn’t let anyone get hurt. The five of us hadn’t yet adjusted to this dramatic change and stood there stunned.

After only a few passes back and forth, he had smashed the encirclement around the five of us into pieces. The farmers and servants were busy dodging the trampling horses and had long forgotten the five poor little thieves in the middle of the circle. Only then did he gallop toward us. It turned out to be Fred. Although his face was covered, the night could not stop the moonlight from leaving an alluring gleam on his black hair. He was probably the first among us to enter the estate, but he had held back until now. It was only after the situation became clear and those who hadn’t escaped had gathered together that he appeared at the right moment and succeeded in rescuing us in one decisive move, as if he were a knight who had come specially to save us. Even more importantly, he had taken control of all the horses in the estate, making sure that the companions who had already escaped wouldn’t be chased by people on horseback. As he kept approaching, I saw his eyes flashing with a light that was both calm and feverish. I had never known that this quiet, taciturn companion harbored such passion inside. At this moment, he seemed like a blazing flame burning on horseback.

“It’s too bad he became a soldier. If he were a mounted bandit, he’d probably be more professional,” I secretly thought.

“Two people per horse. Hurry up, get on, and hold the horse’s neck!” Only then did we see that his right hand was also holding the reins of two other horses. I climbed onto Fred’s horse. Roll and Rama got on one horse, Gerard and Rodrick got on another. He controlled three horses by himself and successfully escaped from the estate amid the chaos.

……

“Sir, we need an explanation!” Back at the assembly ground, Gerard, who had just escaped danger, asked Carlson in fury. I noticed quite a few people lying on the ground. They didn’t look like they were sleeping, including the big guy Dakla.

“This is special training, to test whether you can calmly escape when facing a large number of enemies in a chaotic situation,” our officer replied slowly and deliberately.

“For that reason, you could make us trample on soldiers’ honor, betray the creed of defending our country, and become thieves? And the five of us almost died there, just for a stupid special training?”

“Yes. And I noticed that the five of you didn’t perform very well.”

“You scum of the army camp…” Gerard, who was completely furious, grabbed a broken broom stick he had stolen from who knew where—why would he steal that thing? It gave no sense of accomplishment at all—and charged at Carlson. You could tell he had put considerable effort into the daily group combat training. That forward charge and swinging cut was almost a classic textbook example.

In the very next instant, Carlson stepped forward, suddenly caught Gerard’s hands holding the broom, spun his body half a turn to the right, and threw him over his shoulder with the momentum. The whole movement was simple, quick, and completed in one smooth flow, yet so neat and clean that even amateurs like us could see it clearly. Gerard hit the ground with his back and immediately lost his ability to move. He rolled around on the ground and groaned.

Now I knew how Dakla and the others had ended up lying on the ground.

“Failed to escape: run two laps around the camp as punishment. Insulted an officer: run two laps. Attacked an officer: run five laps. Hmm… the attack didn’t succeed: run one lap. You few…” Carlson pointed at the four of us who had been surrounded together with Gerard. “Run two laps, to be carried out this afternoon. Dismissed.”

As Carlson turned around, I saw Fred promptly stop Rodrick, who was about to charge out to avenge his brother, and whisper something in his ear. Rodrick smiled obediently, looked at Fred gratefully, then turned and helped Gerard up as they walked toward the camp.

In the afternoon, while we were running laps, we suddenly heard miserable screams and dog barking coming from Carlson’s tent. Then we saw him rush out of the camp gate in his pajamas, followed by the two purebred hunting dogs he had just borrowed.

“The dogs the captain borrowed are really something!” Rodrick appeared at the camp gate, looking thoughtfully at Carlson’s retreating figure.

“They really are purebred hunting dogs.” Fred stepped out from behind Rodrick, his tone as calm as if he were stating an ordinary fact. However, each of them was holding an iron stake used for tying dog chains. At this moment, beneath Fred’s proud expression was hidden a slight sly smugness. He no longer had that cold, distant look that kept people at arm’s length.

The next day, a sign saying “Rabies patient, beware of infection” was hung at the entrance of Carlson’s tent.

……

The next afternoon, at the gate of the estate that had been robbed, a group of recruits received a warm welcome.

“Oh, thank you so much. What happened the night before last was terrible. Those robbers were simply crazy. They grabbed whatever they saw, and even my… was taken away. You know, although I’m the famous beauty around here, they can’t express their love in this way…” A lady in her fifties, broad-shouldered, thick-waisted, and with a mouth full of yellow teeth, cried to Roll, whose face was bright red. She didn’t know that the one who had stolen this precious “souvenir of love” was none other than Roll.

He had originally been afraid that stealing something valuable would have a bad influence, so he grabbed a rag from the laundry room, but he never expected it to be an extra-large pair of ladies’ underwear.

The other returned items also included: a wine barrel broken into pieces. This was carried out by Dakla, who had snuck into the wine cellar with me. When he broke through the encirclement, he used the barrel to knock over everyone who tried to stop him. A sleeve—this was because Riley thought taking a whole piece of clothing was too troublesome, so he cut one off. Later, he was chased up a tree by people, and if he hadn’t thrown the hornet’s nest from the tree into the approaching crowd, he probably wouldn’t have been able to get away safely. A handful of lamb bones—we really had no way to return intact what Rama had already eaten. An empty wine bottle—uh… well… the wine was pretty good. There were also other things like a broom handle, a manure fork, a cutting board, toilet paper, and so on. Even we ourselves thought that “this gang of robbers” really had no taste at all.

Because Squad Leader Carlson had been “honorably wounded” during the “hunt for the robbers,” Fred led this operation. He “personally captured five thieves” and “recaptured” three fine horses and a saddle, making him the undisputed number one hero among us.

Unexpectedly, during his communication with the owner of the estate—the local minor nobleman, Baron Porter—Fred behaved with poise and ease. He used aristocratic etiquette and language very skillfully, showing a noble upbringing that we bumpkins couldn’t compare with, leaving us all stunned. Even the Baron himself was quite surprised.

At the banquet held to express gratitude to the “hero squad” for their outstanding contribution in “hunting the bandits,” Fred gave a speech to the hosts on behalf of all of us:

“Ladies and gentlemen, today we sit here receiving everyone’s thanks and feel very ashamed.” I also felt ashamed for drinking the entire bottle of wine.

“We are soldiers. We should originally protect our people and guard our land. This is our duty. But because of our negligence, everyone suffered losses. Please accept our deep apology.” Every soldier was apologizing for what they had done the night before last.

“During the pursuit, we also discovered that those involved in this robbery were all young people. They should have been living a beautiful life full of sunshine and happiness, but they didn’t resist temptation and fell.” If I had known this would happen, I wouldn’t have become a soldier, some people thought.

“But they are still young, and there is still hope. During interrogation, they also told us that they were forced by life and had no choice but to steal and rob. Throughout the whole crime, they never wanted to hurt the kind people here. They are now in deep repentance and asked me to express their apologies to everyone. I hope everyone can forgive their foolishness.” The hosts were all speechless, recalling the scene at the time. It seemed that not many people still remembered the hornet’s nest Riley had thrown or the horses that had scattered the crowd.

Even we ourselves were so moved that tears filled our eyes: How well said! We were still very kind after all.

“But the leader of this gang of thieves—a person guilty of heinous crimes, a crazy and cruel villain who led young people astray—cannot be forgiven. He sucked people’s blood and lived a brutal life. Please believe that he will eventually receive the punishment he deserves. No, he has already received the punishment he deserves. Praise the great good god Daremoth. From now on, he will never disturb everyone’s happy life again.”

At the same time, we all thought of Squad Leader Carlson, who had been bitten on the butt by the hunting dogs and was lying face down on his bunk recovering.

“Finally, please allow me, on behalf of my brave and fearless comrades, to toast the warm-hearted hosts. May everyone live in abundance, and may Daremoth be with you.”

The Baron also stood up and raised his glass: “May the soldiers be brave and skilled in battle. May the God of War, Vesta, be with you.”

Fred’s sincere words and elegant demeanor made everyone present feel spontaneous respect and admiration rise in their hearts. Quite a few unmarried young ladies had already begun casting flirtatious glances.

“So he was actually that eloquent.” My thought had come at a very bad time.

On the cool summer night, the kind farm residents and the brave young soldiers gathered together joyfully.