There was a drizzle outside, light enough to not need an umbrella.

The clock on the wall showed it was almost five PM.

The novel Torigoe had recommended was still open on the table. I had no memory of anything past the first three pages I’d skimmed.

“Oh, you’re up.”

Fushimi was sitting in front of me. She had a paperback in one hand, her head resting on the other as she looked at me.

“Guess the silence here is perfect for napping, huh?”

“We’re not allowed to talk in here,” I retorted jokingly.

“No one will care as long as we keep our voices down.” Fushimi seemed offended. There was no one around, so she was right that there would be no problem.

“Where’s Torigoe?” I asked.

“…She left. I guess she didn’t find anything interesting.”

“Oh. I see. So are you friends now?”

She awkwardly laughed as she glanced at the entrance. “We do seem to have similar taste.”

Figures. That’s why I chose the library.

“Yeah, it’s easier to really get into a conversation about something you have in common.”

“No… Well, yeah. In a sense.” She frowned, then forced a smile. “I guess I could see our talks getting quite heated.”

“Huh. Does she think the same?”

Everyone gets heated when it comes to the things they like, at least in my opinion.

“Yeah.”

I could feel something hidden behind her smile. What had happened?

They seemed to have so much in common… Or maybe they had different points of view on the same hobby, and maybe they’d gotten in an argument. Like they could’ve been sharing their views and realized they disagreed.

But you can’t even get to that point if you don’t have the same passion for your hobby.

“I’m glad you have someone to chat with, even if you end up disagreeing.”

“Yeah…,” she replied languidly.

Now that Torigoe was gone, we had no reason to stay at the library. We headed to the train station through the sprinkling drizzle.

Hina Fushimi

“See you.”

Ryou said good-bye at my doorstep, and I watched him go back home.

The drizzle had already stopped by the time we reached the station nearest to our neighborhood, leaving behind only that peculiar dusty smell that comes after rain.

Ryou turned around and shooed me away with his hand, telling me not to stay all night there watching him and that I should go inside already.

I waved at him, happy that he turned to look at me again. He shrugged and continued on his way home. I watched him until I could no longer see his back.

“I think I…like…Takamori.”

I still couldn’t get those words out of my mind.

I hadn’t been able to say anything back; I’d just frozen there in between the bookshelves. Torigoe had told me to my face she liked my childhood friend.

I entered my empty home and collapsed into my bed.

“You didn’t have to…be so nice about telling me…”

I had never directly touched the topic with Ryou. I’d never asked him who he liked, nor had he told me about any crushes he might have.

I had never even heard any rumors about it. If it had ever come up, I was sure one of the nosy, gossipy girls would’ve mentioned it.

Because of that, I had always felt safe in the knowledge that no one would take him from me.

“Hmm… I was too conceited… Typical childhood-friend arrogance.”

I’d thought wrong. But I wasn’t being neglectful, either. I had told him. Many times. And he hadn’t noticed.

“Ryou, you stupid idiot.”

It must be because he likes bigger boobs…

The porn DVDs he’d had in his room when I visited the other day were all like that.

And I was still developing.

I’d taken a peek during PE, and Torigoe’s breasts…weren’t big. At all.

But they were bigger than mine!

“…It hurts…”

I wonder what Ryou would think if Torigoe told him about her feelings.

She was the classmate he always spent lunch with, so it was certainly within the realm of possibility that she would. In fact, wasn’t she the obvious choice?

“Ow… I’m getting anxious just thinking about it.”

I was sweating, and the beating of my heart was unsteady. I was having trouble breathing.

My chest was aching as I pictured it.

I had only stepped in there today, but the physics room remained a special place for those two.

I was still interested in Torigoe—I still wanted to be friends with her, but…

“Telling me she likes Ryou is basically a declaration of war…”

After opening up at least a little to her, I thought we could be friends, but did this mean it was impossible after all? I mean, it was hard to be friends after a declaration of war. She’d proclaimed me as her enemy (in love, anyway).

It was shocking to think she felt that way when I just wanted to get along with her.

“I should’ve told him I like him on our date the other day! That’s what I get for thinking he’d misunderstand again! My punishment for thinking I still had plenty of time!”

There was no time! I was so full of myself! This is why they say never to let your guard down.

And my guard was way too low.

I might’ve been closest to Ryou among the people he’d known since kindergarten, but I probably wasn’t his number one overall.

Back when we were in grade school, I’d found a note in Ryou’s notebook that got me so upset I tore it to pieces. It was my little sin, brought upon me by young love.

I still had the pieces in my desk drawer because I couldn’t bring myself to throw them away. I couldn’t just break people’s things and then put them in the trash. I’d believed that if I kept it, it could still be put back together with tape and maybe lighten my karmic sentence. I’d locked it up in there.

I got my key and opened the small drawer, taking out the paper pieces.

Maybe he doesn’t remember our promises because he doesn’t think anything of me…

The scraps had Ryou’s handwriting, saying, I like…, followed by the name of a girl who wasn’t me.