15 — In the Spotlight

15 — In the Spotlight

I sought refuge from the endless teasing at the Adventurer’s Guild. Prior to that, though, I had asked Rosa to escort me back to Anna’s clothing store, where I acquired some new garments. Together, these two things had utterly sapped my energy.

I plopped myself down at the counter in the guild’s dining hall and heaved a dramatic sigh.

“You’re ruinin’ the ambience, kid,” the guildmaster said. “What’s got our Saint all down in the dumps, eh?”

“Have you ever been kissed before?” I asked. “Like, unexpectedly?”

I heard several things fall and shatter behind him. It was the vice guildmaster, Milty. Her eyes met mine and her cheeks burned red. She hurriedly bent down and gathered up the broken pieces in an instant before fleeing into the kitchen.

“Did I do that?” I asked. “Wait, don’t tell me. Are you two...”

“Zip it. Don’t you mind her.”

Fair enough. I sighed again.

“Well, what in the hell is it?” Grantz asked impatiently.

“Well, there’s this girl. And she kissed me. But it was just as a thank-you, you know? And I mean, I’ve never even thought of her in that way until now. I didn’t even know she thought of me in that way until now. And there were all these people there, and it turned into this huge fuss.”

Grantz set a cup of hot tea in front of me. I took a sip.

“So, the bonehead’s got a lady. Sounds like you don’t got much to worry about.” He patted my shoulder with a grin. “Was startin’ to wonder about you.”

“Am I that dense? I had no idea.”

How was I supposed to know about this stuff? I was too busy trying to figure out how to survive to get in touch with my emotions.

Wait, if I’d been too dull to notice anything all this time, did that mean someone might’ve actually...liked me? And I just never noticed?

Nah, no way. Like I was some casanova. Okay, now I was just getting depressed.

“Do ya like the girl?” Grantz asked.

That was the question, wasn’t it? Lumina was definitely beautiful and proud, and graceful. And man, her smile. But did I like like her? I had never even entertained the idea.

“Of course I like her,” I said. “I just don’t know if I like her, well, like that. She’s always just been someone I respect and look up to. And I don’t want to let this kiss get my feelings all confused.” Of that, at least, I was certain.

“Guess healin’ doesn’t prepare ya for dealing with the ladies, eh? If you don’t got your feelings sorted out yet, just keep bein’ yourself. What’s so complicated?”

“When is it not complicated?”

If I just went off to Merratoni, it’d look like I was running away. But if I confronted Lumina, it would cause a scene. Really, what I wanted to do was scream at the top of a mountain and curse these children for losing their heads over a little thank-you kiss, but could I really blame them? I had been kissed. Right in front of them all.

If you had put a gun to my head and asked if I were attracted to Lumina romantically right that second, I probably would have said no. But who could say in a few months? My heart started to pound in my chest before calming down soon after, likely due to Substance X.

Come to think of it...I hadn’t felt much of anything when Catherine had kissed me. And then there were the two women related to the dragons and spirits who I was supposed to meet. What if that meant I was supposed to meet my soulmate in the same way?

Regardless of how amazing and great Lumina was, though, I didn’t quite feel the same way I had about my love interest back in my first life. Actually, hadn’t I felt a similar way towards Nanaella and Monica?

“If being confused means I’m in love, and I feel like this towards multiple people, does that make me philanderous?” I wondered to myself. “Somehow I doubt Grantz would understand if I bring any of this up.”

“You just did, Luciel.”

“Hm? Did I say that out loud?”

“From somethin’ about being confused to the part where you made some real bold assumptions about me.”

“Er. Sorry.”

What was I getting myself all tied up over? These were my own feelings. I had nothing to feel guilty about. Maybe it wouldn’t have been a problem if I had avoided the kiss entirely, but I surely would have hurt Lumina in the process. Not that I could have dodged it in the first place...or would have wanted to.

“Whatever.” Grantz changed the subject. “So why’re ya here?”

“A bit of a change of pace. I got permission from the pope to hold another Saint Weirdo’s Day.”

“Thought so. No way you showed up just to chat about girls all day. Lemme know when you’re done. Got some new recipes for ya.”

“Thanks, I will.”

I still hadn’t even gotten through the recipes I already had, but I wasn’t going to say no. I enjoyed cooking.

“I’ll getcha your patients. Head on downstairs.”

“Will do.”

I made my way to the guildhall’s training grounds.

Many people had gathered for the long-overdue holiday. Not just those suffering from wounds but also minor cases like achy joints or back pain. I saw to every last one of them, occasionally several at a time.

When I finally found time to breathe, I realized my team had shown up at some point.

“When did you guys get here?” I asked.

Lionel grinned. “When you opened up to the guildmaster about your romantic struggles.”

“I don’t like that it took me this long to notice.”

“You were being awfully absent-minded.”

“Yeah, chin up,” Ketty said. “You know people tease you ’cause it’s fun to watch you pout, right?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked. The way she put it sounded like Lumina was already free from the torment.

“They’ll be talking about the kiss the Church’s top healer and paladin shared for ages, but no one’s giving Lumina a hard time anymore,” Kefin explained.

“Why not?”

He shook his head. “Said it was ‘just a thank-you kiss’...in a way that made it pretty clear anyone who put her in a bad mood was going to regret it.”

Did that make Lumina manlier than me, or me girlier than Lumina? “Then why am I still getting it?” I demanded.

“You’re young and the opposite of intimidating,” said Ketty.

Oh, so they were looking down on me. Got it.

“This is bullying,” I announced.

“I don’t think they mean bad by it. It means they like you,” Kefin added. “But you do make it easy.”

“Why am I being told this now?”

“Well, that’s just the way I see it. And I was...held up a little.”

That meant Lionel and Ketty.

I seriously needed some time to sort my thoughts out. Lesson learned: I needed to be more aware of the fact that people were always watching me. They had seen my vulnerability in that kiss. I wasn’t so sure about Kefin’s theory that this meant they liked me, though, so I suppose that meant I had more work to do if I wanted to come across with some semblance of authority in the future.

“Anyway, we’re going to Merratoni tomorrow,” I said.

The three asked no questions and obeyed. Then Grantz came asking for me. Mappulo and Jabrone had heard that I was at the guild and brought over a document with a plan for their transportation company.

At a glance, it was definitely optimistic but clearly thought out. I approved their proposal on one condition: they would regularly practice self-defense at the Adventurer’s Guild training grounds. They agreed, I bound them to a contract stating that they would conduct business for the good of the people, and then I gave them an investment to get started. Whether or not I saw any returns on it wasn’t as important to me as them doing some good.

After lunch in the mess hall, I dismissed everyone until evening. Lionel, Ketty, and Kefin killed the time by training with the adventurers, though they never took their eyes totally off me.

“You guys really fit in around here,” I remarked.

“We used to make fun of the adventuring lifestyle in the past,” Ketty admitted. “Didn’t really fit with the military life we were used to. But I’m starting to think it’s not so bad.”

“I’m glad. I need to go somewhere, so it’s about time we leave.”

“One sec.”

She bounded away to fetch Lionel and Kefin.

“Not bad, huh?” I murmured. “Yeah. It’s not so bad living in Shurule.”

I found myself wondering yet again if those three really belonged with me.

We were on our way out to visit a magic item shop and that restaurant in the slums when Grantz caught us and handed me the recipes.

“Forgot somethin’,” he said. He cracked a smile, revealing a warmth underneath his gruff exterior. “Nothin’ like cooking to take your mind off your troubles.”

“You’re really popular with old men, sir,” a voice suddenly said.

I jumped. “Whoa! Estia! Scared the hell out of me. Where’d you come from?”

“Um, I’ve been here the whole time,” she said. “I’ve been watching from a nice corner ever since that lady broke the plates at the bar.”

If anyone else had told that to me, I would have called them a stalker.

“She arrived at the guildhall with us,” Lionel said, confused by my shock.

Well, I sure as hell hadn’t noticed her. Was the Spirit of Dusk to blame? Or did she have some kind of presence-concealing skill? On that note, where in the world had she been the whole time?

“She was with you?” I asked. “I never even saw her.”

“I was hiding,” Estia replied. “It was very boring, though. There were no assassins.”

I wasn’t sure if I was ready to rule Estia out as an assassin herself, although Ketty already covered that role well enough on her own, thank you very much. Galba could probably have refined her skills into something terrifying.

“Well, thanks,” I said. “Wait, assassins? Why would there be assassins?”

“There might have been,” she corrected me.

If I were speaking with the spirit right now, I’d have a few questions, but alas.

“Please protect me in a less creepy manner going forward.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Grantz, I’ll be back to visit in a few months,” I told him.

“You, uh...hang in there, pal,” he replied.

“As always.”

I exited the Adventurer’s Guild, hoping Rina’s magic item shop might have some neat new products to improve my exhausted mood.