Chapter 14: Even Receptionists Need to Make a Living

Chapter 14:
Even Receptionists Need to
Make a Living

 

“DON’T YOU THINK our family is a little cold?”

I broached the subject over the breakfast table the morning after I’d exorcised the spirits. My father, my mother, and my little sister Alice all dropped their bread and looked completely baffled.

“Of course not,” said Alice. “Familial bonds are important, expressing that is a good thing.”

“I’ve said it many times before,” said my mother. “But I love both you and your sister from the bottom of my heart.”

“Aren’t you forgetting somebody?” my father said, pointing at himself.

My mother didn’t say a word and simply flashed him a tepid smile. I thought she’d made the right call. One wrong word and there was no telling what nonsense father might get up to.

“Yes, mother, but there are some things you can’t express in words. Things you have to show with your actions.”

“Goodness, brother dearest, you aren’t suggesting crossing the bounds of decency and engaging in forbidden love, are you?!” Alice asked.

“Eh? Not in the slightest.” All I was suggesting was probably the least indecent thing imaginable: a hug. “I think we should hug every morning. Come on, stand up.”

I opened my arms wide and gave my mother a big hug. Then I did the same to Alice, whose cheeks were bright red for some reason. My plan worked; I generated more LP. Satisfied, I sat back down.

“Well, uh, family definitely is important,” my father said with a bashful look. “And so is body language. I agree.”

“Why are you blushing?”

“I-It’s just a little embarrassing to hear my son say that to me.”

“I’m not giving you a hug, father.”

“What?! But why?!”

“I mean, that’d be weird, wouldn’t it?”

“This is discrimination! I’m your family too, you know!” He clung tearfully to my mother, but it didn’t take long for his expression to mellow as he buried his face in her ample bosom.

“Father, must I remind you that certain activities are only appropriate in the bedroom?”

“Hmph, I’m not listening to anything my cold-hearted son has to say. Oh no, now I’m discriminating!” He looked aggrieved, but I wasn’t concerned. His mood would surely improve by this evening.

I finished my breakfast and headed to the park by the clocktower. The final ghost in the fancy armor had mentioned his weapon was buried at the foot of the largest tree. Thankfully, there weren’t a lot of people around, so I started digging without having to explain what the heck I was up to. After about an hour, I was drenched with sweat and realized that I was going about things extremely inefficiently.

“At this rate, the day’ll be over before I get this done.”

The ghost had said it was beneath the big tree, but that still covered a pretty significant area. My only real option was to make a new skill.

 

Excavate — 100 LP

 

It wasn’t terribly expensive, and I might even have a use for it in the future. I quickly made myself the skill and the digging got way easier—I absolutely tore through the earth around the base of the tree. Nothing about the ground or my shovel had changed, but it took about a fifth of the effort. I kept working for another hour, thankful for the usefulness of the skill.

Suddenly, I hit something hard. I moved faster and…there it was! A solemn iron box, buried in the ground. I pulled it out and brushed it off. It was about three hundred years old, so the box itself wasn’t in the greatest shape, but its contents were probably fine. It was fastened from the outside with a simple mechanism, which I unlocked before I lifted the heavy lid.

“Wow…”

A single sword lay within. Its black scabbard was decorated with gold. The contrast was strikingly beautiful. The sword’s handle was also gold and looked fit for a king. It didn’t take much more than a glance to tell it was a truly high-quality item.

I timidly reached out to touch it, but stopped my hand just before I made contact and decided to use my Discerning Eye.

 

Two-edged Blade: B-Grade. Skills: Sharp Edge; Bad Luck

 

If a weapon had a name, that would have been displayed too. It was pretty darn impressive, overall—a B-Grade sword with skills attached. Sharp Edge significantly improved a blade’s cutting ability and made it more durable against breaking and dulling. The problem, as you might expect, was Bad Luck.

 

Bad Luck: Increases the probability of bad luck befalling the owner.

 

It had been no coincidence that bad things started happening to that ghost once he obtained the sword. Curse skills were the price you paid for great power. Normally, you’d take a blade like this to someone who could lift the curse or sell it off to an arms dealer. But, lucky little me, I had the Editor skill.

 

Replace “bad” with “good” — 200 LP

“Bad Luck” will become “Good Luck”

 

Perfect! I approved the change and the item description changed along with it.

 

Two-edged Blade: A-Grade. Skills: Sharp Edge; Good Luck

 

Sweet. Now it was an incredible weapon! It may have just been a two-edged blade, but it made good things happen too. That must have been why it went up a whole rank. I could probably make other skills to Bestow upon the sword too, but because my LP was getting low, I decided to pay Emma a visit first.

 

***

 

“Congratulations! You’ve been promoted to D-Rank!” Lola rang her bell vigorously.

“Hey, we knew you had potential, kid. Thanks again for that meat the other day too!”

Everyone in the guild hall applauded and I bashfully scratched my head. I’d finished my requests for the day and finally earned enough points to rank up. It took me a little longer than I’d anticipated, but I was still moving up the ranks pretty fast. The timing was pretty perfect, too—I was starting school tomorrow.

I’d just completed a task collecting ten goblin wrists. Since Emma was busy with family affairs, I made short work of this one on my own.

“Now that you’ve been promoted to D-Rank, allow me to introduce you to some new guild systems. Please take a look at this first.” Lola pointed to the graph on the wall. It was the one I’d noticed on the first day, that had bar graphs as well as Lola’s and the other receptionists’ names on it. “Once our adventurers make it to D-Rank, they can choose a receptionist as their manager. We sometimes call this our ‘Support System.’”

“Oh, I get it. So, the graph tracks the points of the adventurers you manage, right?”

“You always were a sharp one. They’re not exactly the same as the point-system scores, but that’s probably the best way to think of it.”

“Lemme guess, those scores have an effect on your salary?”

“Perhaps…”

Now it all made sense. This was why all the receptionists were so pretty. You didn’t really need to be managed by one, and most people wouldn’t bother unless they were otherwise interested or felt some obligation toward them. But the support system meant people wanted to make their receptionist number one in the guild.

Whoever came up with the idea had a killer head for business. Surely any adventurer who fell head over heels for a receptionist would work extra hard to help her win.

“So, what do we adventurers get out of it?”

“Normally, every month, each receptionist gives a present to the adventurer who contributed the most points. Usually they’re coupons for things like shoulder rubs or handshakes, or even granting you the honor of going shopping with me.”

“Selling your body, huh?”

“Watch your language! The competition is deadly serious, okay?”

“S-sorry about that.”

“I’m only telling you this because I hate it when people get the wrong idea: I’m a virgin.” She said the potentially scandalous word in almost a whisper, but I heard each pronounced syllable.

“I don’t really get why you needed to…ohhh, never mind, I get it.”

Some of the receptionists probably leaned a little more heavily on their sex appeal for monthly rewards, but Lola was trying to fight clean.

“If you have a long streak of bad scores, then you get the axe, so everyone’s doing what they can. There are plenty of receptionists who focus on trying to seduce unattached and highly competent adventurers.”

That made sense, I guess. They probably used the old “I could be free tonight…as long as you pick me”-type strategy.

“Just look at Sarah, she has the highest score on the chart.”

“Wow, you really can’t miss her, huh?”

“It’s not just her large chest that makes her stand out. Every month she gives out a coupon to cop a feel.”

“Well, I think I’ll go with Sarah then!”

“You’re absolute scum! It seems I’ve misjudged you Mr. Noir. You’re nothing but a lech!”

I was a little confused. I had meant it as a joke, but Lola was clearly upset. She started defending herself, and I wasn’t a monster, so of course I assured her I was just kidding and that I’d always intended to pick her. When her tears vanished and were replaced by an ear-to-ear grin, I realized she’d played me like a fiddle.

“I look forward to working with you from here on! You know, Mr. Noir…I think I might be able to offer a super special coupon…just for you,” she said, looking up at me coquettishly, her long eyelashes fluttering.

I had to wonder where on earth she’d learned how to do that. She couldn’t have been born with it. Right?

At any rate, both the adventurers and receptionists were working their butts off to make a living. You needed money to survive, after all. That kind of work wasn’t easy. I was all too acquainted with it myself.