Chapter 8: Lola’s Battle

Chapter 8:
Lola’s Battle

 

“WHAT’S GOING ON?”

“You have excellent timing, Sir Noir. I need some help keeping Lola under control.”

“What crawled up her butt?” asked Emma.

“Not even you can stop me, Mr. Noir!”

“Okay,” I said. “But why are you so mad?”

“That jerk Sarah keeps stealing my adventurers!”

I looked over at Sarah—she looked to be about twenty and had a glamorous figure, beautiful facial features, and long hair. There was nothing timid about the bold smirk on her face.

“I’ll have you know,” she said, “I haven’t broken a single rule. Are you sure you’re not just losing adventurers because you’re lacking in charm?”

“You lying witch! You’ve been seducing them!”

“That’s a funny way to say you can’t compete.”

Sarah shot a glance at the receptionists’ scorecard tacked up on the wall. The bar graph showed that she was far and away the top scorer. The others weren’t even close. This month, Lola appeared to be in third place.

The guild employed older men and women in various clerical positions, but the receptionists who interacted directly with the adventurers were by and large attractive young women. Adventurers had the option of choosing (or not) any of the receptionists to manage us once we hit D-Rank. Luna and I, along with Emma (despite her frustration) had selected Lola to manage us.

When an adventurer completed a task, their receptionist’s score went up. The scores determined the receptionist’s status—so the more adventurers a receptionist managed, the higher their score, the higher their wages, and the more on-site privileges they got.

About once a month, the receptionists offered some kind of prize to their adventurers, hence the thirty-minute shoulder rub coupon I got from Lola. We were also free to change receptionists at any time. You could even switch regularly if you wanted. It seemed like Sarah had just seduced away some of Lola’s adventurers.

“Does this happen a lot?” I asked Luna.

“No, there’s actually something of an unwritten rule among the receptionists, but…”

Now it made sense, Sarah had broken an unspoken code of honor. That was what had made Lola snap.

“This Sarah chick’s always been up to this kind of thing,” Lola snarled.

“Like. I. Said,” said Sarah. “Do you even have any proof? Did anyone tell you I made an untoward gesture?”

“Well, no.”

“Then who are you to say that I’ve done anything illegitimate? Maybe they’re just tired of your sloppy work.”

“Sloppy work?!”

“Yes, yes, yes, now if you’re that frustrated by this turn of events, why don’t you actually make an effort to beat me for once in your sorry life?”

“If I beat you,” Lola replied, red in the face, “will you swear to never use these underhanded tactics again?”

“I’m not using any ‘underhanded tactics’ to begin with, but…sure, I’ll swear to continue not using them if you beat me.”

“Fine,” said Lola. “Then I accept your challenge.”

“But in exchange,” said Sarah, “if I win, I will take one of your adventurers.”

“You aren’t after Luna, are you…?”

Luna was a C-Grade adventurer and had a lot more points than either me or Emma. But Sarah’s eyes were set on me.

“Mr. Noir Stardia, allow me to introduce myself. I’m Sarah Longhran!” She bowed, casually squeezing her breasts together to give me a good look at her cleavage. She was a crafty one.

“Y-y-you want to steal Noir?!”

“Considering Noir is Olivia’s—oh, wait, that’s a secret, isn’t it? Considering he’s such an incredible person, his skills could never properly develop under your management. Now, if I were managing him, I’d make sure to send him out on extremely pleasurable missions.”

The clerical staff could sneak a look at the adventurers’ records. Sarah must have discovered that I had my master’s skills, Get Creative, Bestow, and Editor. My curiosity was piqued, so I used my Discerning Eye to look into Sarah and let me tell you, I was shocked by what I found. Just who is she?! She specialized in that kind of skill?!

By “that” kind of skill, I mean, well, let’s just say a more indecent variation on my Shoulder Rub skill, if you catch my drift. That must’ve been how she commanded such ardent support from the men.

“I’ll give you one month to beat my score. Don’t forget our agreement, Lola.”

“Ugh…I didn’t think you’d be after Noir…”

Sarah ignored the deflated Lola and walked over to me. “I just can’t wait to become your manager, Mr. Noir.”

She deployed the same killer tactic as before, but this time from point-blank range. My endurance was wearing thin. Whenever Sarah was near me, my head started to spin. If Lola didn’t beat her in a month, I might actually end up letting Sarah manage me…

At which point I suddenly noticed the intense negative aura emanating from Emma. “Hey, Noir, you’re not thinking that it would be a win-win for you, are you? Are you?!”

Emma’s face was a terrifying sight to behold. And of course I wasn’t thinking that…much.

“I don’t believe Sir Noir is that kind of man,” said Luna, “no matter how impressive the bosoms on display. Though, I have to admit, they are quite alluring. Perhaps she might finally prove a worthy match to Lady Emma. I couldn’t possibly hope to compete.”

“Y-you know I don’t judge women on cup size, right?”

“You sure about that?” Emma asked. “You are kind of a closet perv.”

“Hey!”

Unfortunately, I couldn’t exactly deny it. I was a healthy young man, you know?

But Lola looked like she was getting even angrier. “What are you talking about?”

“Nothing! Sorry!”

We all hastily apologized and segued into missions. First, we strategized about Sarah.

“Honestly now, what do you think your chances are?” I asked.

“Hrm…well, I’m gonna try my best. I absolutely hate people who break the rules, and I’m not letting anyone else manage you, Mr. Noir.”

“We’ll do whatever we can to help, I promise. Just give us any and all high-value requests you have. Got anything with dragons, maybe? We’ve got our own competition going on this month.”

I explained the conditions of our school exam. Lola did know of a request for dragon parts, but it was B-Rank, and we weren’t allowed to take requests more than one grade above us. Even if Emma and I managed to succeed and acquire the materials, we wouldn’t get guild points for it. Although…we had Luna in our party, and she was a C-Rank adventurer. More importantly, the parts required for the request didn’t include the dragon’s fangs.

“Plus,” said Lola, “completing a dragon-related request will add considerably to my score.”

“Then we’ll do it! I’ll admit I’m a little nervous, but I think we can probably manage.”

“Oh, but there’s one problem…” said Lola. “The only known living dragons reside in a restricted zone.”

Treasure Mountain was off-limits to anyone but the royal family, a handful of nobles, and adventurers of Rank C and above. As you might imagine, it was also home to some incredibly delicious fruits and nuts, along with medicinal herbs that fetched a high price at market.

“Supposedly dragons nest there, too, but quite a number of people have died going after them, so the kingdom has curtailed access.”

Just to be sure, I called on the Great Sage to ask where the nearest dragon was, and sure enough it was on Treasure Mountain.

“I guess we should focus on getting to C-Rank first. You okay with that, Emma?”

“Sounds great to me.”

“As your friend, I shall aid you however I can. Heh…friend.” Luna had been working as a solo adventurer for a long time, so the sound of the word “friend” was particularly sweet to her.

“Got it,” said Lola. “Then I’ll keep assigning you requests, Mr. Noir.”

“Please do.”

Our goal was to defeat a dragon within the month! That way, we could score high on our exam and Lola would get a big boost to her score. But it would be no easy task. First, we’d have to plow through a whole heck-ton of monsters.