Chapter 27: Anti-Dragon Countermeasures

Chapter 27:
Anti-Dragon Countermeasures

 

WITH A NEW BOUNCE in my step, I headed to the hidden dungeon. This time, I had no intention of exploring. My main objective was to consult with my master, Olivia. I headed straight for her room on the second floor.

<You finally came back, Noir, my kindred spirit.>

“I wish you’d knock it off with that. I know you just think it sounds cool.”

<Actually, I just remembered something.>

“Remembered what?”

<When I was alive, I hardly had any friends.>

“Technically, you’re still alive. You have a future ahead of you too.” And to be honest, she didn’t really come off as the type that needed friends or dedicated romantic partners in the first place.

<Enough about me… What’s next for you? The eighth floor was it?>

“Maybe next time. Today I’m here to talk to you.”

<Oh, now that just brings a tear to my eye. I’ve been dying to use this one line I read in a collection of famous phrases. Mind if I go for it? ‘I’m glad I’m alive!’>

I had to wonder where she got all that energy from. She was even psychically cackling. Though really, talking to her always got me fired up too.

“I told you how I wanted to get dragon parts for an exam at school, right?” I said. “I’m thinking about hunting one down together with some friends of mine, but I was hoping you had strategic advice.”

<The thing about dragons is that you have to change your approach drastically depending on the specific type of dragon you’re facing. I think the toughest varieties would be a liiiittle too much for you to handle right now.>

Olivia was nice about it, but basically she was saying I had no chance in hell of succeeding. That said, I’d heard that the dragons on Treasure Mountain weren’t, comparatively, all that powerful. In fact, Lola had told me that the main reason none of the higher-grade adventurers had taken the request to go after them was because the compensation was too low.

<Okay, okay, don’t make that disappointed face. I’m sure you’ll find a way to manage, Noir. You’ll just need to make yourself some new dragon-whupping skills!>

“Then please, tell me more.”

<But first, do you respect poor old Olivia as your master?>

“Of course I do.”

<Then prove how much you admire me.>

She was off on another ridiculous tangent again. I had to play ball, or she wouldn’t either. What to do, what to do? First, I tried stroking her hair.

<I’m not a child, you know.>

“Okay, then how about this?”

I ran my hand down her back instead, which seemed to earn me more points. Then her stomach. That she seemed to like a lot.

<Mm, why don’t you move your hand just a little lower.>

“No thanks.”

<Don’t you want to know more about those dragons?>

“If you insist…”

I gently stroked her thighs and she finally gave in.

<Okay, I’ll give you a pass. You sure tried hard enough.>

“I’m glad you still have some shred of conscience left.”

<Now this isn’t the only trick that beastie will have up its scaly sleeve, but to start, most dragons have a skill called Menace, and it’s far and away more trouble than anything a regular monster could throw at you. You’ll freeze in your tracks and your knees will give out. But from a defensive perspective…>

From there, she went on to tell me all sorts of things about dragons, from skills to watch out for to offensive skills that might just get me out of this hunt with a prime set of dragon teeth.

***

 

The first step in my new plan was to earn a decent chunk of LP. I needed three skills before I could even think of going up against a dragon: Courage, Hearing Protection, and Dragon Killer. Courage would cost me 1,000 LP, though Hearing Protection was only 800, but Dragon Killer was 2,000 just for the C-Grade variant. It jumped to 5,000 for the B-Grade version.

The first two skills were focused on defense. Courage would counteract Menace, though even with it, if the enemy was too strong, it would still be rough. Better with than without, though, right? Similarly, Hearing Protection would stop my eardrums from rupturing if the dragon roared while I was in close quarters.

The last one was exactly what it sounded like: Dragon Killer, a specialized offensive skill against dragons. But it wasn’t without issues. I wasn’t sure what exactly to Bestow it on, for one. There wasn’t much point in just giving it to myself. That might be worth it if I fought with my hands, but I relied heavily on weapons, so I’d have to plan on punching the thing if I did that.

Therefore, Bestowing Dragon Killer on a weapon was by far the better idea. But then, if I Bestowed it on my trusty two-edged blade, I was cornering myself into close-quarters combat, and I kind of wanted to stay at range. It didn’t really matter how strong the skill was if I couldn’t actually cut my enemy with it.

Unable to decide, I set the issue aside for the time being and focused on acquiring the defensive skills. All around, I was determined to be more proactive.

As night fell, I ran into Luna on my way home. She had just finished her work as a cleric for the day.

“Do you feel like getting dinner together?” she asked.

“Absolutely. My stomach won’t stop growling.”

“Heh. Well, let’s find a good restaurant then.”

Restaurant? Wait…I had a sudden flash of inspiration and I made a suggestion to Luna.

“Since we’re going out to eat, why don’t we try a restaurant that specializes in unusual cuisine? I went to a really amazing place like that with my family during the holiday.”

“Oh, I see. You think this might be helpful for the fight against that dragon.”

“Yeah, it’ll earn me some LP.”

In agreement, we headed to the restaurant in question. Even though it was peak dining hours, the restaurant was practically empty.

“A bit of a ghost town, hm?”

“The food’s great, but, yeah…”

No matter how you tried to dress up the dubious cuisine at this joint, it didn’t have the best image. In my opinion, people would have changed their tune if they just tried the food. I had the fried scorpion the last time I went, so I ordered something different this time around. Deep-fried mealworms seemed like a good choice. On my suggestion, Luna ordered the fried scorpion and, to go with it, some viper liquor.

Our meals got to the table quickly, probably because of the lack of other customers.

“This is admittedly…shocking, visually.” Luna might have been mature, but she was still kind of girly about bugs. I felt bad for dragging her along when I saw the tears in her eyes.

“Please, don’t force yourself. I’ll eat it if you can’t, it won’t go to waste.”

“No, I ordered it, I want to try… Who knows, it might introduce me to a whole new culinary world. I-I’ve always thought that’s a good attitude to cultivate.”

Despite Luna’s brave words, she still had tears in her eyes. Personally, I found my selection more disgusting than the scorpion. My plate was covered in a pile of what looked like earthworms. I poked them gently. They had been fried, so they were firm on the outside. I summoned my courage and put one on my tongue, closed my eyes, and chomped down.

“Ooh!”

I was a little embarrassed by my own outburst, but I couldn’t help it. It was so crunchy and juicy and absolutely delicious! Once I started, I couldn’t stop. Before long, I’d decimated the mountain of mealworms.

Luna seemed to have grown less averse to her meal as well. She was steadily sipping the viper liquor. Admittedly, the liquid in the cup wasn’t particularly offensive to behold. Although, if you looked closely, you could pick out fine bits of snakeskin floating within it.

Soon, the both of us were so engrossed in our meals we forgot to talk. Happily for me, the meal earned me a tidy 800 LP and I immediately used it to acquire Hearing Protection.

Plop! Luna flopped over on the table when she finished eating. It surprised me a little and I peered down.

“A-are you okay?”

Her face was bright red and her eyes bleary. That viper liquor was pretty strong. “Shir Noiirr, I feel so good right now!”

She couldn’t even work her mouth effectively, so I knew it was my responsibility to see her home. I paid our tab and supported her on my shoulder as we walked out.

“I’m, like, totally fiiiine. I’m fine, okay. Okay? He he…”

“You don’t look fine. I’m going to make sure you get home safe.”

“Men are pigs, but you, Noir? If you tried to take advantage of me, Noiirrr, I’d consider myself lucky…”

“I feel like you’ve got a few wires crossed there.”

“But I can’t really do much, so I’m boring, right? Let’s have some fun, Sir Noooir…” Luna caressed my neck and gazed up at me with passionate eyes. She was completely sauced. Normally, she was pretty restrained, but I guess this is what an absence of inhibitions did to her.

Luna’s home was in a corner of the main residential area. It was fairly large for one person. I was less envious of her accommodations and more in awe of how much work it must take to keep clean. …Maybe there was something wrong with me for thinking that way.

I carried her all the way through her door and into her bedroom. Once I hauled her up into bed and tried to leave, she grabbed my hand and wouldn’t let go. “Be gentle please,” she slurred.

“You might be drunk, but this is getting ridiculous! Please, just lay down.”

When I tried to pull a blanket over her so she wouldn’t catch a cold, she suddenly grabbed my arm and yanked so I fell onto the bed. Before I could even protest, Luna climbed on top of me and pushed me flat.

Her long, beautiful hair spilled out from behind her neck. Her face was still red, but her eyes were serious.

“I don’t normally do things like this,” she said.

“I can imagine. It kinda…wrecks your image.”

“I decided that tonight, I was gonna stick my neck out and finally shoot my shot. Lately…I’ve been thinking it might be nice to be with you.”

“W-well, I certainly appreciate the thought. I think you’re very pretty too.”

“So, is that a yes?”

“Um, well, uh, that’s kind of a separate issue…”

I didn’t get any more words out before Luna’s slowly approaching face closed in on mine. Her plump, shapely lips trembled, nervous.

My heart pounded, increasingly out of control. Ahh, her face was right in front of me. I reflexively closed my eyes.

Fwump! A small sound came from beside me. Yup, that’s right, beside me.

“Luna?”

Apparently, it was the sound of Luna collapsing face-first into a pillow. She was still on top of me, but she wasn’t moving.

“Um, you’re kind of heavy…”

She didn’t react, so I pushed myself up to check her face. She was already dead asleep.

“I guess she wore herself out before she could make her move…”

Even a cleric couldn’t fight alcohol-induced drowsiness forever. I was relieved, but at the same time, a little disappointed. All the same, I tucked her into bed.

Her soft breathing was adorable even while she was dreaming.

“Good night,” I murmured, and tiptoed out of her house.