Part 9: The Miner and His “Safety First” Dungeon Run

Part 9:
The Miner and His “Safety First”
Dungeon Run

 

THE GROUP HAD left a tearful Fioriel behind at her home before setting out for the Ancient Castle of Riften. The elf girl made them promise to swing by on the way back. Several hours later, the party cleared the forest and were met with a wide-open plain.

“Sir Miner! This is Riften’s famous Galessa Shovel!” Lithisia exclaimed.

“Your Royal Highness, I think you mean the Galessa Steppe,” Catria corrected her.

“In honor of Sir Miner’s elf castle, I took the liberty of renaming it.”

“Please don’t.”

“Too late!” She stuck her tongue out at the knight. Catria didn’t bother with a response. Lithisia was too far gone.

Alan was more than happy to leave arguing with the princess to Catria. He looked toward the ancient castle that sat atop a small hill on the plains.

The castle wall had broken down, all manner of plants growing over the surface. It was still in the distance, but even from where he was, Alan could see the yellow aura surrounding it. That aura signified the presence of the undead. Once, the castle had been the home of a huge royal family. Now, it was nothing more than a nest for evil.

“Somewhere beneath that castle is the Blue Orb,” Lithisia said. “I bet Sir Miner could grab it in two seconds with his shovel!”

“Your Royal Highness, surely you jest. That’s a castle of horrors. Even Sir Alan couldn’t possibly…” Catria trailed off, realizing her argument didn’t stand up to the miracles she’d already seen.

“Tell that to the World Tree Castle,” Lithisia retorted. “The captain of the Holy Shovel Knights needs to properly understand the true power of the shovel.”

A bead of sweat made its way down Catria’s forehead. It was true. This man might actually be able to do what the princess proposed. “W-well, Sir Alan? Can you get the orb?”

Alan thought for a moment. “I can.”

It was that simple.

“I knew you could do it, Sir Miner! I shovely believed!” Lithisia exclaimed.

“You can…?” Catria sighed in resignation. Of course he could do it. He could seemingly do anything.

“Wait, wait, Catria. I can do it, but I didn’t say I would.”

“Huh?” Lithisia and Catria simultaneously tilted their heads. “What’s that supposed to mean, Sir Alan?” the knight asked.

“For example, let’s say I used my Shovel Wave Motion Shovel Blast to blow away the entire castle.”

“Your example is absurd, but go on.”

“What if there happened to be a powerful monster lurking within that had a reflection barrier?”

Seconds passed in silence. “...Are there monsters capable of doing that?” Catria asked.

“Beneath the surface, there are. There was one beneath the mountain I lived on.” It was the single most powerful creature he had met in his thousand years of life.

Where the 6,666th layer of the jewel mountain connected with the Alter Genesis of Amber was a territory controlled by the Demogorgon, the King of Hell. It was a place of molten rivers and ashen skies, of blue and white lightning, and of death. It was in this hell that Alan suddenly found himself under assault by a rocky mountain.

Except it hadn’t been a mountain. It was the massive body of the Demogorgon.

That said, Alan was an experienced miner. He immediately understood the situation he was in and fired off the Wave Motion Shovel Blast without a second thought.

KAAAAAA-BOOOOOOOOOOM.

“What?!”

The Demogorgon had reflected Alan’s beam in a silver flash. Actually, it was more like the beam had been moving in reverse. It should’ve been impossible for most magics to have any sort of effect on the Wave Motion Shovel Blast, and yet, the Demogorgon had reflected it. Alan would later find out that the Demogorgon had rewritten the laws of the world to reverse the beam’s vector.

The miner discovered something important that day. He found out that deep below the surface lived creatures able to freely rewrite the laws of the world.

It had been a fierce battle. In the end, it was a blast from his Wave Motion Shovel Blast at point-blank range that defeated the creature. Despite coming out of the battle victorious, Alan had prepared himself for death. That was how serious things had gotten. He would not presume that there were no such creatures on the surface of the planet.

“And that’s why safety is the number one priority when it comes to dungeon runs,” he finished.

“Whoa, wait, wait, wait!” Catria immediately cut in. “The Demogorgon is a creature that appears in creation myths! It’s the Great Demon whose power is said to rival that of even the Dark Lord!”

“So that was the Great Demon? Hrm. No wonder it was so powerful.”

Catria furiously shook her head. “No, no, no, no, absolutely not! This is impossible! Use common sense!”

“Wow, so Sir Miner is already a legend,” Lithisia sighed. “Ah, how shovelful!”

“Either way, safety is our first priority. This is for your training too, Catria.”

“Wait, me?” Catria asked.

“You want to be strong like me, right?”

“I…well…”

“That’s what you said when we first met, was it not?”

“I mean, yes, but…” Catria had to admit he had a point, but she’d only said that because she’d mistaken him for a swordsman.

Alan nodded. “The basics are generally the same between swords and shovels. I’ll teach you what you need to know as we progress through the dungeon.”

“B-but I really don’t need you to teach me…” Catria was not about to become some sort of weird shovel devotee like the princess. What would the other knights think?

“You’ll get stronger,” Alan pointed out. “Trust me. I’m the number one miner on this planet. I can tell you’ve got talent. Let me mine it out of you.”

“Urrgh…” Catria groaned. The miner’s attempts at baiting her were working like a charm. It was like he was dangling a large diamond in front of her. He thinks I have talent, she thought. How could she not be happy that the strongest man in the world felt that way about her? “...I-If it doesn’t work out, I’m quitting, got it?”

“Of course.”

Catria couldn’t help but let a small smile slip onto her face.

 

***

 

First on the list of objectives was info collection. Alan created some Shovel Soldiers and had them dig into the dungeon, checking for things like monsters, traps, and routes. Once the information had made its way back to the miner, he projected a Dungeon Run Guide onto the blade of his shovel. The metal was polished to a mirror-like sheen, displaying everything they would need to know about the dungeon.

“Wait…” Catria apparently had questions. “What the hell just happened?! How do you have a perfect map already?!”

“Dungeon runs are war.”

“War?!”

“Exactly. And in war, information is the difference between life and death.”

As he taught Catria the ropes, Alan looked over the info on his shovel. Generally speaking, they were looking at a whole lot of undead enemies. Catria could take care of them on her own with a little help from Alan, but he refused to take the risk. It was possible that a God-class creature could be feeding him false info. After all, “safety first” was the name of the game.

“All right,” Alan said. “Our first priority is to completely isolate the dungeon from the outside world.”

“What do you mean?” Catria asked.

“Catria, when it comes to war, enemy backup is the scariest thing of all.”

“What’s your point?”

“We’re going to put up a barrier so that even if a giant squad of dragons came as backup, we’d be fine.”

Catria looked up at the sky. It was perfectly clear; excellent weather for kite flying. There was no way a group of dragons could ambush them from this beautiful sky. “What is your deal with dragons?” she asked. “Do you have some kind of dragon-related trauma or something…?”

“Yes,” he replied matter-of-factly.

“…Oh.”

Once when Alan was mining for jewels, he was attacked by a group of dragons that had been summoned out of nowhere. He’d barely escaped with his life. So in the spirit of “safety first,” Alan felt they required a countermeasure against wandering dragons.

Alan drew up a shovel circle (the shovel equivalent of a magic circle, shaped like a shovel) with his shovel and booted up the barrier. Unlike the barrier he’d created for the Elf Woods, this one didn’t need to be permanent. As a result, it only took him twenty seconds to surround the entirety of the ancient castle. With that, they’d no longer have to be concerned about outside interference.

“Whoa…” Catria stared at the castle with dead eyes.

The gigantic barrier surrounding the castle let off a bizarre humming noise. Even if one were to gather all of the continent’s mages together in one place and conducted a hundred-year casting ritual, they’d be unable to create a barrier this large.

What the hell is this?!

“A shovel barrier… It’s shovely cool!”

Lithisia’s comments only served to further confuse the knight. Please, shut up. “Argh! A-Alan, let’s hurry up and start the dungeon run!”

“Absolutely not. I’m only just getting started making things safe.”

“Making things safe?”

“Correct. I’m going to do a good old dungeon reform.”

The dungeon in question was three floors deep and four floors tall, but it was filled with narrow passageways and all kinds of death traps. These were the things that Alan would have to take care of. He’d create one easy-to-navigate passageway and bury all the traps with his shovel.

But even then, there was the possibility of unseen enemies lurking in the shadows, the kinds that could stay off the grid. Alan dug a warp hole into the passageway, just in case they had to make an emergency exit.

“Never forget. Making things safe is the key to a successful dungeon run.”

Construction wrapped up in three minutes flat. Catria simply looked at the map of the reformed dungeon with an empty expression on her face.

“What’s wrong, Catria? Is there something you’re still worried about?”

“I… Ever consider countermeasures for if a meteor fell on your head?”

Catria was coming up against the limits of her patience.

“A meteor, eh? I hadn’t thought of that.”

“...”

“It’s true, though. The surface is at risk of falling meteors. Catria, put this on.” Alan plopped a helmet on her head with a sticker reading “Safety First!” plastered on it. It covered up her beautiful red ponytail, but nobody was thinking about that at the moment.

Catria was dead. Well, she was alive, but psychologically, she was dead. Catria of the Dead.

“Perfect. Time to head in!”

The front gate of the castle was old and covered in dangerous thorns, so Alan got rid of it. He replaced it with a cream-colored door that wouldn’t have been out of place on a palace. Catria opened it, her eyes still dead. A single skeleton came running at her, and the knight instinctively took a combat stance.

It was then that she noticed the ground was shockingly easy to move across. In fact, it was waxed like a gymnasium.

“...”

Catria defeated the skeleton with three strikes, and watched it fall to pieces on the floor.

“...Alan.”

“Yes?”

Catria seemed to want to say something, but kept stopping herself beforehand. She repeated this a handful of times before eventually deciding she didn’t care anymore. “Alan… What exactly is a dungeon run?”

“War.”

“War, eh? I get it now. It’s war. Hahaha…” Catria dropped her sword to the ground and looked up. The miner said he would teach her how to mine, but all she had learned was one simple fact. “I never realized that war was so empty…”

And thus did Catria grow as a knight.

 

***

 

“By the way, Sir Miner. Could you teach Catria how to make dungeons safe?”

“Wha?”

“It’d take about two years, by my estimations.”

“I don’t mind. She’s the captain of the Holy Shovel Knights. She’s what everyone will aspire to.”

“Whoa, hold on, Your Royal Highness!”

“Got it. First let me prepare a shovel just for her.”

“Stoooooooooop”

Catria’s trials and tribulations had only just begun.

 

***

 

In the end, Catria was unable to push back against her princess’ wishes, and was ultimately forced to shoulder a shovel.

“This is just a tool! A tool for exploring dungeons! That’s it! Don’t worry!” Her eyes were filled with tears as she repeated these words to herself.

The trio managed to safely make their way through the dungeon, eventually arriving at the deepest area of the castle. Despite the condition of the building itself, the treasure room was still as beautiful as ever. In the center was a pedestal, the Blue Orb shining radiantly atop it.

The entire room was illuminated by its divine blue light. It was almost as if its radiance was cleansing their very souls.

“Amazing… This is the orb spoken of in Rostir legend…” Catria had recovered from her zombie-like state just in time to express how moved she was by the orb in question. “Yeah! This is it! This is the kind of treasure hunting that gets the soul fired up!”

“Sir Miner, why is this room shovely clean and well-maintained?” Lithisia asked.

“When I made the map, I had my shovel soldiers clean the place up.”

Smash. That was the sound of Catria slamming her head against one of the nearby pillars. “Why didn’t you just have one of them grab the orb?!”

“Madness. They had one objective: safety first.”

“Shoveling shovelberries (TL: that’s our Sir Miner for you)!” Catria was at her wit’s end. At this point, nobody outside of Lithisia could be bothered to figure out what she was actually saying. “What in the bloody world is wrong with you and that shovel of yours?!”

“Hrm. Behind you.”

“Eh?”

The light blue aura surrounding the orb began to take the shape of a human. A young girl, in fact. Her entire body was transparent, and she had not an ounce of clothing on her. Her long, silver hair made her look like some kind of deity. Slotted into her forehead was a jewel that glowed a creepy black light.

The see-through girl floated in the air, eventually opening her eyes.

“Wha…? Is this the spirit that dwelled within the orb?”

“No, not quite.”

Alan gripped his shovel.

The girl with the silver hair stared down at Alan and the others, then grinned. “Hee hee, puny humans. Fair sacrifices, welcome to my abode.” As she spoke, her body began to glow a yellow aura, the very same one unique to the undead.

Catria immediately gripped her sword, not her shovel. “Dammit! This thing is the ruler of the castle!”

“I quite like smart humans. You shall become my kin!”

She emitted a pitch-black aura from the jewel on her forehead. Its power was incredible. Catria was at a loss for words. As a knight, she’d participated in numerous monster hunts, but she’d never seen a creature as strong as this.

“Urgh…!”

The pitch-black aura began to coil itself around Catria’s body, but then, all of a sudden…

KA-CHOOOOM!

“Nngyaaa?!”

Catria’s shovel exploded with bright light that snaked forward and eliminated the dark aura. The naked girl fell face first onto the floor. “Wh-what was that light?!” she howled, holding her head in pain.

“...What just happened?” Catria whispered to herself.

“The power of the shovel.”

“Why does it always have to be a shovel thing with you?”

“No, seriously. It was the power of the ‘Holy Knight Shovel’ I gave you.”

Catria cast her gaze to the silver shovel on her back. It was glowing as radiantly as the sun itself.

“Holy Knights have holy powers, do they not? When I gave you the shovel, I infused it with Divine Shovel Power.”

“Sir Miner’s Divine Shovel! That would surprise even the Holy Angel of Shovels!”

“No such angel exists.”

“Then I’ll make one later!”

Catria looked at the silver-haired undead girl cradling her head on the floor. When she aimed the shovel on her back in her direction…

“N-no! Stop!” the girl screamed.

Catria immediately felt bad for the undead girl. Ah… This girl is just another victim.

“Grr… H-how dware you do this to mwee! You insolent pest!” The undead girl rose to her feet while glaring at Catria. She was already fumbling her words, making her look like just an ordinary young girl. “D-don’t look at me with those sympathetic eyes! I, the immortal Queen Alice Veknarl, will show you the true meaning of fear!”

A rumbling noise surrounded them. The castle began to shake like it was being struck by an earthquake, but this was no natural calamity—it was the sound of countless monsters racing across the ground.

Alice vanished. She’d probably fled the castle.

“An army, eh? Looks like it’s my turn.”

“Isn’t it always?”

“It’s not my fault that the shovel is useful in all situations. More importantly, let me teach you something, Catria.”

“What?”

“The shovel is the most powerful weapon of all.” Alan pointed his shovel directly at her eyes and firmly stated. “Especially on the battlefield.”

A few seconds later, Catria looked up toward the heavens. How many times had she asked herself this, today alone?

What the heck is a shovel?