Part 22: The Miner Bestows the Holy Knight Sword upon the Knight

Part 22:
The Miner Bestows the
Holy Knight Sword upon the Knight

ONCE ALICE used her powers to overwhelm and capture Raystol, the prime minister’s underling, Alan and the others swiftly retrieved the Silver Orb. The crew decided to head back to the World Tree Castle so they could work through the information they now had. It would take about four days on foot to return there from Snow Mountain.

Yet Catria wasn’t completely satisfied with Alan’s explanation of their journey. “Can’t you teleport with that shovel of yours?”

Alan shook his head from side to side. “If it was just me, yeah, but a normal human body wouldn’t be able to withstand the pressure.”

“I could,” said the undead king.

“I can teleport myself, too!” said the Shovel Sage.

“Yeah, but Lithisia and Catria are just normal humans. It’d be impossible for them.”

Slowly, Catria glanced at Lithisia. “She’s…normal?”

“Er, what’s wrong, Catria?”

The knight somehow managed to keep her mouth shut despite the intense wrongness she felt about Alan’s statement. Sure, Lithisia is totally “normal.” She’s my master, after all. After a beat, Catria nodded. Awesome. I’ve convinced myself!

Alan placed his hand on his chin and looked to be thinking of something. “But you’re right. Four days is a long time… Let’s use my Shovel Glider to head home.”

“Hoooold on.”

“It’s a good thing we’re on a snowy mountain. It’ll be possible to accelerate using a Shovel Jump.”

“Hoooold on!”

Phrases starting with “Shovel” poured out of Alan’s mouth at an alarming rate. Catria had a terrible feeling about all of this. But despite her protests, Alan didn’t wait. After placing his shovel on the ground, he gave it a command.

“SPREAD!”

The head of his shovel suddenly elongated, large enough for people to ride atop of.

Don’t tell me he expects us to get on that thing.

“All right, everyone. Make sure you hold on tight to the person in front of you.”

“Nope! I refuse! I’ll walk home by myself if I have to! Let go of me!”

“Nuh uh!” Lithisia clutched Catria from behind.

Alan joined the group at the front of the shovel, which began to inch forward. It went slowly at first, but in the blink of an eye, it picked up to such an intense speed that blasts of snow cut across their cheeks. The shovel accelerated, faster and faster until there was no stopping it.

“Aaaah! Wheeee! We’re going so fast, Sir Miner!”

“We’re experiencing a snowy world at the speed of light! I’m so profoundly moved!” yelled the sage.

“We’re going to jump soon. Hang on tight!”

“No! I don’t wanna die! Noooooo!”

But no amount of screaming would help Catria now.

The shovel barreled down the slope at Mach speed, sparks flying between the metal head of the enlarged tool and the snowy ground. In front of them swooped an upward slope that looked almost like a jumping board.

All at once, Catria was blinded by incandescent white. The light of the sun. The party was flying straight toward it, nothing but blue sky ahead of them. They soared far above the billowing clouds.

This shovel can go anywhere and everywhere. Past the horizon, past the world. What is a shovel? Father, I…

“Geh.”

It was around that time that Catria lost consciousness. In the end, the shovel glided approximately 200 kilometers through the sky. It was probably a world record, and one that wouldn’t be broken any time soon.

***

At the front gate of the World Tree Castle, Catria finally came to. Only ten minutes ago, they had been in the snowy heart of Shilasia. Fio came running out of the elf castle to greet her uncle, bountiful breasts bouncing.

“Uncle Alan! Welcome home! I’m so glad you’re okay!”

“Mm. I’m also happy you’re in such good spirits.”

“I always am!”

Fio wore the smile of a child who had just received a Christmas present. Even alone in the elf castle, she was getting by happily. That was a sincere relief to Alan. Together, the party headed into the main hall.

“If I remember correctly, this place has a jail, right? Alan, I’m going to head there first and get ready,” Alice said. She was going to prepare to extract intelligence from the necromancer Raystol. As for what kind of prep she needed to do, well, it would have been troublesome for Fio to hear. Alice was the king of the undead and the emperor of nonhumans—and of the inhumane.

“So this is the World Tree Castle… I should be able to make great strides with my shovel research here!” Riezfeld’s eyes sparkled as she took in the library (shovel collection). She clearly planned on sticking around. “‘The Element of Magic: A Facet of Shoveling’—I plan on writing my thesis under a title like that!”

“You should probably make sure humanity never gets its hands on said thesis.”

“But I think you should read it, Catria.” Riez inched closer to the knight. “Catria, you’ve seen it yourself, have you not? How the shovel is capable of overriding any and all magic.”

“Urgh.”

“No matter how unbelievable it seems…” Riezfeld was serious. “A true sage is one who is able to recognize, accept, and understand the things they see with their own eyes and touch with their own hands.”

If that was the true definition of a sage, then Lithisia might very well be the greatest sage in all of human history.

Wait, I don’t want to be a sage! I want to be a knight! thought Catria.

“Shovely amazing, Lady Sage! Thank you so much! I’m shoveling (cheering) for you!”

“I’ll do my shoveling best!”

It was as if there were now two princesses in the party.

“Ugh, my head. It aches.”

“Are you okay, Catria? You’re speaking shovely funny.”

“Princess, it’s your madness that’s causing this headache.”

“Madness? I’m perfectly right of shoveling mind!”

Catria’s eyes went white as she held her head in her hands.

Meanwhile, Fio had drawn close to Alan. “Uncle Alan, would you mind telling me about your journey?”

“Of course.”

And so Alan began to weave the tale of their exploits. He told Fio of breaking through the desert nation’s checkpoint, of the Water Priestess Julia, and of the legendary red dragon. But of all the stories Alan told, the one that truly caught Fio’s imagination was that of the Rahal Tribe and the hot springs. The young elf’s eyes sparkled.

“Amazing! Amazing! A priestess capable of summoning water and creating hot springs?!”

“Ha ha, I take it you’re interested in giving them a try?”

“Yes! Long ago, there apparently used to be a spring called the ‘Spring of Life’ right here in the village!”

“Oho. Now that you mention it, I recall it being behind the elder’s house.”

Alan had bathed there with Pasarunak back in the day. It was a spring that had served as the home to life spirits that were capable of healing any and all illnesses. Alan hadn’t been sick in some nine hundred years, but for a normal human, he was certain that its effects must have been spectacular.

“I was just thinking about how one day I’d love for this castle to have a spring that’d go down in the legends.” Fio placed her hand atop her large breasts. She wanted to return the elf village to its former glory. It was clear that her desire to fulfill her dream had only grown stronger in Alan’s absence.

“In that case, we should have Julia come over.”

“Really?! Thank you so much! I’m so happy!”

“She’s way better at summoning water than I am, so… Hrm, a spring, eh?”

Alan had remembered something else. A statue of a great elven hero had been enshrined in the Spring of Life, and Alan had once promised Fio that he would shovel (build) her a statue. Of course, to Fio, “shovel” in this instance referred to the private activities that two people attracted to one another might engage in, but that’s neither here nor there. Alan had been busy with his journey for the orbs, so he hadn’t been able to fulfill what he understood to be his end of the deal. “I’m sorry, Fio, but that promise I made to you is going to have to wait a little longer.”

“Huh?” Fio blinked and tilted her head, but then, a few seconds later, her entire face went red. “Oh my gosh, um, um, er!”

She frantically looked away, her bosom heaving. But despite her embarrassment, she wore a smile on her face. She was happy that Alan remembered—that a promise to someone like her meant anything to him whatsoever. Fio couldn’t help but smile and let out a happy sigh. “Um, I’m an elf, so…”

“So…?”

“I have a long lifespan. I can wait for as long as you need me to! So, um!” She stared directly into Alan’s eyes and brought her hands together as if she were about to pray, causing her breasts to squeeze together. It was almost like she was trying to emphasize her plush features, despite the pure expression on her face. “We can shovel whenever you p-please…”

Why was she getting so bashful over the act of shoveling? Alan could only assume it was just a thing that elves did.

Nonetheless… Her words gave him a real urge for shoveling. He wanted to do something for the adorable elf girl who called him “uncle.”

Wait a second. Just as he was about to voice these feelings, he stopped in his tracks. He remembered another promise of his—that he would teach Lithisia how to shovel. Unlike the one he had made with Fio, his promise to the princess had a time limit. He told her he’d sit her down after they finished their business with the Red Orb in the desert nation. If he didn’t get on that soon, he’d be a liar.

“Fio, I’m sorry, but I have to teach Lithisia how to shovel today.”

“Ah, oh, gosh, um?!” She tripped over her words. For some reason she seemed terribly frazzled.

It was then that Alan had an idea. “If you’re okay with it, would you like to join us? The shoveling is a bit different (from sculpting), but…”

“Er, um, huuuuuuuuuh?!” Fio was potentially more shocked than anyone else in history. “W-wait, a-are you saying, um, you want the three of us to shovel t-together?!”

“Yeah. Lithisia kind of has the wrong idea about shoveling,” said Alan, sugarcoating just how bad the misunderstanding really was. He was sort of hoping that if Lithisia could see someone else using a shovel, she might finally figure things out for herself.

“Aaaaaaah! Um, um, ah…” Fio hugged her body close, rubbing her voluptuous thighs together. She was extremely embarrassed by Alan’s proposition. “I… I… Um, excuse me…”

“No… It’s fine if you’d prefer not to join us.”

“It’s not that, I swear! I just…” Her face now fully crimson, Fio did her best to find the courage to continue. “I-It’s a little embarrassing, so I’d l-like our first time to just be…the t-two of us.”

“O-oh, sure.”

Fio had asked so gently, tears in her eyes. How could Alan say no to that? If anything, it felt like he was bullying her. Which was true in a certain sort of way, even if he didn’t realize it.

Alan gave up on his bright idea and instead patted the elf girl on the head. “I’m sorry. Forget I said anything. I’m going to make time for you later so I can teach you how to shovel, just the two of us.”

“Aaah…” Fio stared up at Alan. She wore an overwhelmingly sweet expression on her face, and quietly whispered, “I’m shovely happy…”

I really do have to do something about that shovel princess, thought Alan.

***

According to Alice, she still had plenty of prep to do before getting to her interrogation, so in the evening Alan decided to deal with the promise he made to Lithisia. He finally brought her to his bedroom to teach her how to “shovel” properly. Or at least that was the plan, but for some reason, the princess was sniffing her own body.

“U-um, do you mind if we perhaps delay our session until later tonight?!” she said in a concerned fashion.

“Why?”

Lithisia squirmed about, gripping the hem of her dress as she struggled with her reply. “W-well, it’s just… We’ve been traveling a whole bunch, and I’ve been sweating, er, no! Um! I’d just like to take a bath beforehand!”

“You’re going to sweat once we start practicing, you know.”

“Aah?!” Her cheeks immediately turned pink.

Of course they did. As far as the princess was concerned, “shoveling” (verb) was the act of creating a successor for Alan, also known as having his child. He said she was going to sweat. And she would, no doubt. But the thought of the miner smelling her sweat beforehand was just too much for her.

As for Alan, he was still under the impression that this shovel lesson was all in the name of helping Lithisia gather potential mining apprentices in the capital.

“P-pretty shovely please?” the princess pleaded, shovel-shaped tears forming in her eyes. Everyone in the party had kind of forgotten at this point, but Lithisia was still just a fifteen-year-old girl in love.

“Hrm, I guess I don’t mind. In that case…”

A moment later, a knight clad in white armor stood in Alan’s room. “What the hell,” she whispered.

Needless to say, the knight in question was in fact Catria. She had no idea why she’d been summoned to Alan’s bedroom. In her opinion, he needed to just go back to shoveling (verb) with Princess Lithisia, or whatever it was the two of them did.

“I had some free time on my hands, so I decided to help you.” Alan clutched his shovel.

How exactly was he planning on helping her? Better not to even ask.

“I refuse. I don’t plan on throwing away my humanity anytime soon.” Catria was meant to swing a sword, not a shovel. But as she turned to leave the room, something made her stop.

“Catria, a shovel can be used to unearth your latent skills as a swordswoman.”

Her skills as a swordswoman? Those words were enough to freeze her in place. It really didn’t take much. After all, they were a powerful charm magic even stronger than Zeleburg’s Charm.

“Don’t you want to hurry up and become a Holy Knight? I can teach you how to get there.”

The draw of the shovel. Becoming a Holy Knight. These words overpowered Catria’s heart with devastating efficiency. Her skills as a swordswoman—she had given everything for them. And she had promised herself in the ice nation that she would swing her sword no matter what.

“Didn’t I tell you? Talent is something you unearth.”

“Urgh!”

“I can unearth your talent. Your skills.”

“Gah!”

Alan closed in on the knight. After all, as a miner, digging things up was his job. How could he not dig into the mountain of latent abilities that was Catria? “Don’t you want to be talented?”

Of course she did! But by means of the shovel? No! She refused! But she wanted to be skilled with a sword. She craved it.

“Grraaaaaaaaaah!” Her mind was a mess. Conflicting feelings smashed into one another, and seconds later, Catria’s head turned robotically. “I-If this doesn’t work, I’m stopping immediately!”

And thus the lady knight did fall. The miner was quite skilled at this sort of thing.

***

Catria stood in the center of the room decked in a full set of armor. Next to her stood Alan. Off to the side was Lithisia, sitting on her knees. She had asked to observe until she’d dried off from her bath. For some reason, her cheeks were in full blush. She certainly had been acting odd all day. Sure, she was always odd, but today was different.

“What’s wrong, Lithisia? Are you feeling all right?” asked Alan.

“J-just seeing your shovel is making my heart race…” Lithisia panted, her breasts rocking with her breathing. As for why she was in such a state, the answer was simple: she was thinking of the shovel practice they’d engage in following Catria’s session.

But upon seeing the princess in her current condition, Alan came to his own conclusion. She must be sick.

Truthfully, it was an incurable disease.

“C-Catria’s first time shoveling… I can’t wait.”

“I will not be shoveling anything! He’s just coaching me is all!”

“Coaching you in shoveling.”

Alan ignored Lithisia. “Shall we begin?”

A nervous expression formed on Catria’s face. She held up her long sword and focused. The knight had no intention of learning Alan’s shovel skills, but she knew full well that he was strong. If she could only figure out the secret behind that strength, she’d be able to grow as a swordswoman. She could gladly accept his coaching without ever needing to grip a shovel.

“Catria, today I’m going to teach you ‘Shovel Breaking.’ It’s a basic skill.”

Alan turned to a doll clad in armor next to the wall. He pointed the head of his shovel at the center of its body. Making sure that Catria could see his full stance, he slowly pulled his shovel back, and after injecting some Shovel Power into the shovel’s head, he slowly thrust it forward. The metals made contact with a gentle ting.

Until a moment later—CRACK!

At first it looked like Alan had made a single crack in the iron armor, but soon after, the whole thing fell to pieces.

Thrilled, Lithisia smiled and clapped her hands.

“There you have it. Simple, right? Give it a shot.”

“What about that was simple?!” Catria yelled to the heavens. All Alan did was slowly thrust his shovel forward, and yet he completely annihilated the armor. This was clearly no human feat.

“This is a really basic skill. Heck, 90 percent of the laws of physics are being obeyed.”

“Normally, 100 percent of the laws of physics should be obeyed!”

“Don’t worry, as far as I can tell, you should be able to learn how to do this in a snap.”

Catria stopped moving. “Wh-what? In a snap?”

“I might have used a shovel, but it’s the same with a sword. You just have to thrust with the intent of ‘digging.’”

Catria looked down at her long sword and back up at the doll. Her physical strength had always been somewhat lacking. This was one of her primary weaknesses. Yet, supposedly, at her fingertips was a skill that could shatter iron armor. If she could learn how to do it, she would be able to defeat even heavily armored opponents. It was a truly formidable skill.

“Grr… Can I really do this?” Catria wanted to become strong. Strong enough for her father to be proud of her. Strong enough to be proud of herself. This was worth trying.

She turned to the armored doll and used her left hand to line up the target. She then thrust her blade into the doll, the image of “digging” resonant in her mind.

PIERCE!

“Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!”

Catria’s utterly focused voice echoed throughout the elf castle.

***

After approximately thirty attempts, the armor remained unscathed.

“Haaah, haaah, haaah. See?! I just can’t do it!”

“Hrm, interesting.”

Catria’s shoulders dropped. She was defeated. Once again, she was a fool for ever believing this shovel man’s words. There was no way an ordinary sword could pierce iron armor. She’d have to submit herself to some kind of bizarre power if she ever wanted to accomplish something like that. She was an idiot for thinking she could pull off such an unbelievable skill.

“Catria, try holding this.” Alan drew his “Holy Knight Shovel” from his back, then tossed it to her.

Despite the surprise throw, Catria managed to catch it. What was he planning?

Alan didn’t stop there, however. He immediately followed this up by chucking the iron armor at Catria at high speed.

“Aaaaaaaaaaah!!!”

Catria had to dodge, but it was way too fast. The suit of armor was going to collide with her, and she was going to die. She didn’t want to die! Not yet. She didn’t want to fall without anything to be proud of. As these thoughts raced through her mind, she waved the object in her right hand almost entirely on instinct. It was the Holy Knight Shovel she had received from Alan.

The second the head of the shovel collided with the incoming iron armor, the armor exploded into pieces that rained to the floor.

“Huh?” Catria looked down at the shovel in her hands, unsure as to what had just transpired.

“I knew it.”

“Wh-what?”

“Wow! I knew Catria would be more fit to swing a shovel! That’s the captain of the Shovel Knights!” Lithisia said proudly.

Catria stared blankly at her own hands. They didn’t ache in the least, despite having used a shovel to pierce iron. As much as it pained her to admit it, the action came to her immediately. It was as if she’d been wielding a shovel for many years, to the point that she’d used such an awesome technique… Did she really have talent as a shovel-wielder…?

“No, wait, wait! No! This isn’t what I wanted! What are you thinking, Catria?!” She furiously shook her head from side to side. This was dangerous. Coupled with Lithisia’s voice, she had nearly been corrupted by the shovel. She had to keep herself together. “Oh, I know! You must’ve done something to the shovel!”

“Nope. That’s a normal shovel outside of the ‘Deep Shovel Power’ properties attached to it.”

“Which means Catria really does have talent as a shovel-wielder!”

Lithisia’s eyes lit up, and Catria panicked even more. This was impossible. Her hands dropped to her side, allowing the shovel’s tip to brush against the ground. Almost immediately, the ground shattered.

At that, new thoughts were unearthed in Catria. She could dig. She could use this ability. She felt like she could shovel anything. She wanted to shovel! She wanted…

“No! That’s not me! Quit it, Catria!” she screamed as her body surrendered. Even if her body got shoveled, she refused to let her heart be taken the same way. She was a knight. She wasn’t a shovel-wielder. Never!

“Catria, just give up and open your heart to the shovel.”

“Princess, I must refuse! Even if that is an order, I cannot abide by it!”

“Catria.”

“Ngh?!” Catria trembled.

The voice Lithisia spoke in was kind, but it held all the authority of royalty. “Did you not wish to become strong enough to be the pride of your house?”

“Urgh.”

“Was it a lie when you vowed to me that you would become the strongest Holy Knight in the land?”

“I… I…”

“Is it not a knight’s duty to make use of everything available to them in order to become stronger and protect their nation?”

Lithisia wasn’t wrong, and that truth stung Catria deeply. But neither was Catria stupid. She held an even deeper truth within her heart.

She had seen Alan’s madness with her own two eyes time and time again. The knight understood that if she ever took up the shovel, she might be able to do what he could. She could become a hero that took down dragons. She could be the legendary paragon she dreamed of becoming since she was a child.

But with a shovel?

“Urgh… Aaah…” Tears began to stream down Catria’s cheeks.

Not a sword, but a shovel. Was that really the only path ahead of her? Was she destined to become a Holy Shovel Knight, slaying dragons in her boring work clothes? The talent she so desired was now within the palms of her hands. All she had to do was grip the shovel, and her dream would come true.

“Aaah… Aaaaah…” Her tears dropped onto the shovel and her vision went blurry. She could no longer see her sword. That same sword that she’d trained with for so long. Yet for some reason, the shovel was perfectly visible.

“Catria, it’s time for you to pick up the shovel and join me and Sir Miner…” Lithisia whispered into her ear. Hers was a sweet voice seemingly capable of melting brains. “Let’s shovel together.”

Catria hit her limit. She could resist no longer. Trembling, the knight turned toward Lithisia and slowly began to nod her head.

“Quit it, Lithisia.”

“Owie!”

Alan gently bopped Lithisia over the head with his shovel. “The shovel is not a tool for brainwashing your subjects.”

“I w-wasn’t brainwashing her! I was just trying to help her better understand the charms of the shovel.”

“Lithisia.”

“I’m sorry, Sir Miner…”

The princess dropped her shoulders in disappointment as Catria’s vision cleared up. She had no tears left to shed.

“And anyway, I think Catria should wield a sword.”

“Huh…?” The knight blinked in disbelief. Wasn’t this guy supposed to be a shovel evangelist just like Princess Lithisia?

“Didn’t you say you wanted to become a sword-wielding hero? Wasn’t that your whole reason for swinging that blade around? If that’s the case, you need to follow through. No matter what anyone says to you, digging away at the same spot will eventually give you the clarity you seek.”

“Alan…” Tears began to form in Catria’s eyes yet again, but they were of a different type this time.

“Following through. That too is a part of learning to shovel. Do you understand, Lithisia?”

“Ah… Sir Miner…” The princess was still down in the dumps. “I’m shovely sorry… I thought I understood the shovel, but I was just ignorant…”

Lithisia was legitimately sad. Hopefully this would prove to be a learning moment for her.

“Follow through, huh?” Catria repeated to herself, ignoring the back half of Alan’s words. He was right. She had to see things through. She was aiming to become the strongest Holy Knight in all of the land—with her sword in hand.

“But the truth of the matter is that you have far more talent as a shovel-wielder than as a swordswoman.”

“Gah!”

“Reality and your own desires differ, which means we have to think about connecting the dots between the two.”

It was terribly frustrating that this man who seemed entirely unreal was completely right.

“So how about we try this?”

Alan placed Catria’s Holy Knight Shovel on the floor. He then began to smash his own shovel against it, until eventually it had changed its form.

“Wait…” Catria murmured. “This is a Holy Sword now. But how?”

The blade shone white, its shape like that of the swords in legends and fairytales. Its presence alone emitted sanctity and purity. It was a sword of justice capable of cutting down any evil. There was just one thing a little off about it: the tip of the sword was wide like an arrow, a form designed to pierce armor.

“This is incredible… I can feel the holy wave motion energy coming from it.” Catria took the Holy Knight Sword into her hands. It felt just right, even more so than her own sword or the shovels she had held before. It was almost as if she had been born to wield it. She gave it a light swing, and the blade left behind a shimmering trail in the air.

Catria’s eyes were shining. “Unbelievable! Amazing! Alan, this is a real deal Holy Knight Sword!”

Alan had reshaped the shovel into a sword, exactly the one that she’d always wanted. At first Catria tried to express her gratitude.

Then Alan said, “Right? It’s the Holy Knight Shovel Blade.”

Catria stopped in her tracks.

“Sir Miner, what’s a Holy Knight Shovel Blade?”

“See how the tip is shaped like a shovel?”

Apparently the bit that resembled an arrowhead was actually designed to look like the head of a shovel.

Lithisia gleefully raised her voice. “I get it! So it’s like 20 percent shovel!”

“Oh, and behind the grip is a special handle for shoveling.”

“Wow, so it’s more like 30 percent!”

“Oh, and if you yell ‘DIG’ it’ll transform into an actual shovel.”

“Oh my gosh, so it can completely become a shovel then!”

Catria was battling furiously with herself. She wanted this sword. She really wanted it. It’d all be fine, she told herself, as long as she didn’t think too hard about it. Now that she took a good long look at the sword up close, it was clear that it was actually a shovel. But unless she said anything, nobody would ever notice. The blade gave off a holy aura, and anyone not named Alan or Lithisia would certainly never…

“Th-this…” Catria ground her teeth together. She had to follow through!

“This is…” She raised her Holy Knight Shovel Blade into the air, and for some reason, the waterworks began to flow again. Somehow, she managed to force out a smile. She had finally managed to fool herself. “This is truly a Holy Knight Sword.”

That evening, Catria took several large steps forward in her quest to become the best knight in all of the land.