Part 29: The Lady Knight Fires Her (Self-Proclaimed) Holy Wave Stream

Part 29:
The Lady Knight Fires Her
(Self-Proclaimed) Holy Wave Stream

According to Lala, they needed to reach an underwater ruin some thousand feet beneath the ocean’s surface. The ruins were once a glorious shrine to the god of the sea, Lernia Hydra. In those halcyon days, the shrine was a paradise for mermaids and other demi-humans.

But a few years ago, humans had brought a strange orb that swiftly turned the shrine into a den for monsters. Prime Minister Zeleburg was likely behind this heinous act.

Lucrezia’s father had sealed the shrine door in an attempt to keep the monsters trapped inside, but considering the hawkmen who had menaced Lala, the door might well have been opened.

The party hoped to find the kidnapped mermaids within the shrine as well.

“Then let’s be on our way,” said Alan. “Catria, you’re with me.”

“For real?”

“Didn’t I promise to train you into a full-blown Holy Knight?”

Alan had indeed promised her that. All the same… Catria turned in a slow circle.

She found Alice fishing off the bow of the ship. It appeared as though the Undead King had grown weary of the haunting shovel atmosphere and was indulging in some dedicated escape from reality. Lucrezia, on the other hand, looked like she wanted to join the underwater journey, but the trip would be too dangerous for a normal human such as herself. Once they found the seal that could only be opened by one of Lucrezia’s lineage, they could bring her down with Shovel Dive.

Catria wondered if they could switch places. And yet.

“Let’s go.” Alan hefted his shovel, primed and ready to dive into the ocean.

“Whoa, wait!” Catria waved her hands in protest. “How the heck am I supposed to swim a thousand feet below the ocean?!”

“Come on, that’s simple. You dig up the oxygen present in the water using Shovel Breathing. It’s one of the basics of clearing an underwater dungeon.”

“You’re the only human on this planet who could pull that off.”

“Catria, don’t play around. Just do it.”

“I can’t do the impossible!”

“Wait, Alan!” Lala crawled over to Alan on her fishy tail. She looked terribly concerned, as she still couldn’t believe he was going to face the Hydra. She anxiously waved her tail as she clenched her fists and pleaded with the miner. “Alan, you no have fins! You can’t dive, into ocean!”

“Don’t worry, Lala,” Lithisia cut in. “We don’t have fins, but we do have shovels.”

“Shovels not fins!”

“Now that’s simply incorrect. A shovel is about 90 percent fin. Take a look.” Lithisia brought over a shovel from the corner of the ship’s deck. It wasn’t Alan’s sword-tipped shovel, but rather one with a square head. Lithisia popped off that metal head and placed it against her butt, flapping it around. “See? Shovels can become fins!”

“Whaaa?!”

“Lala, not too long ago you said the two of us were different. Humans and mermaids, those of us who live on land and those who live beneath the sea… And you’re right, we are different. Our bodies, hearts, and where we live, none of these are the same. But even so.” Lithisia smiled. “Even so…as long as we have shovels, we can understand one another.”

Lala blinked at the princess, then her eyes sparkled. “We…can?”

Like hell, Catria thought to herself as her own eyes darkened. This stupid princess was corrupting even an innocent mermaid with her shovel religion nonsense. Did this qualify as marine pollution?

“I no really understand, but okay. I no stop you…”

“Mm.”

“That’s why, I do what I can. Alan, raise head.”

“Hrm?” Alan looked questioningly at her.

What was Lala planning? For now, he crouched down and held his head like she asked. As he did, Lala brought her mouth close and blew into his. Something whooshed from between the mermaid girl’s lips into Alan’s, and with that she pulled away.

“…”

Alan remained crouched for a moment, lips parted in surprise. Lithisia, on the other hand, was frantically opening and closing her mouth like a baffled fish.

Lala was the only one still moving. Her cheeks glowed in high color. “Mermaid kiss… It bring you great, fortune.”

Suddenly, a glimmering membrane wrapped around Alan’s head. It swelled up like a soap bubble, then formed into a kind of transparent helmet. Lala went on to “kiss” Catria as well, resulting in the same membrane appearing around her head.

“Oho!”

“Alan, now you breathe underwater. Yours last about three days. Catria’s last three hours. This due to difference in adaptability.”

“That’s no good at all,” said Lithisia. “Catria, hurry up and abandon your humanity, please.”

“No, thank you!”

Lala turned to Alan once more and nodded once in gratitude. “Please, Alan. Save mom, dad, and, everyone.”

It was an honest request, and Alan wasted no time pursuing it.

He hopped over the edge of the Ultimate Shovel and began to furiously dig through the water at high speed. Behind him, Catria clung onto his legs, and Lala followed up with her elegant underwater maneuvers. In the very back was Lithisia, whose dress had transformed into a frilly bathing suit.

Of course, this suit was a rather seductive white two-piece. While the color scheme emphasized Lithisia’s “purity,” the lack of overall cloth brought ample attention to the swell of her breasts. She exuded a sensuous aura befitting a Shovel Princess.

Incidentally, Catria had also donned new underwater gear. For some reason, Lithisia had prepared a rather tight-fitting blue sports bathing suit for her. Who knew what she was thinking when she readied it.

“Hold on, Your Highness!” Catria had realized something was very off. They were already two hundred feet deep. “How are you following us? Lala didn’t ‘kiss’ you, did she?”

“Ah! I forgot! You okay?!” gasped Lala.

“Of course I’m fine! I’m using Shovel Breathing. It’s simple.” Lithisia held the grip of her small red shovel in her mouth. She was sucking up air through the open space of the handle. The head of the shovel produced white bubbles that entered her mouth. If one listened carefully, they could hear her breathing sounds: “Shoo, velll. Shoo, velll.”

This stunning revelation nearly caused Catria to pass out.

“Lithisia, that’s an ability called Snorkashoveling,” said Alan. “Not bad. Not bad at all.”

“Scoop you so much, Sir Miner! Also, um…how’s my bathing suit?” Lithisia squirmed as she shyly squeezed the head of her shovel between her breasts. This further emphasized their largeness and softness as they wafted with the current of the water. She pressed her thighs together too, making for quite the attractive sight.

To put it mildly, she was alluring as all hell.

“Do you…like it?” Although Lithisia was bashful, she was extremely invested in Alan’s answer.

But from the blank expression on his face, it was clear he didn’t really get what she meant.

She pressed, “Um, um… When I wear a bathing suit like this, do you think I’m a ‘shovel’?”

“Er, I’d argue you’re plenty ‘shovel’ all the time.”

Upon receiving this answer, tears welled in Lithisia’s eyes (even though she was underwater). “Ah… Aaaah… I’m so shoveled (shovelly moved)!”

“Enough with the shovel words!”

“Catria, humans amazing,” Lala said, endlessly impressed by the party.

Catria shook her head. It was hard, scientifically provable fact that these two were no longer human.

The party continued to plow through the water at explosive speed. Soon, they saw a giant something-or-other shining green in the distance. It looked similar to Rostir Castle, but was in fact far larger. It also emitted an astronomically oppressive aura, as if the castle itself were a giant monster.

That’s the Deep Sea Shrine?! thought Catria.

“Lala, is that where the kidnapped mermaids are?”

“They captured in underground prison. I can’t get in by myself…”

Suddenly, a strange voice found its way into the party’s ears. “R-run away…run…you mustn’t come here, Lala!”

“Mommy?!”

The voice was unclear at first, but it soon grew more understandable. Gradually, the form of a beautiful translucent woman took shape directly in front of Lala. She closely resembled the young mermaid; it was obvious this was Lala’s mother, and that she was using some kind of long-distance telepathic magic to project herself.

“Mommy, Mommy! I here, save you! I bring strong, people!”

“No, Lala! You mustn’t come! Run away! Hydra is…”

“Don’t worry! Alan strong! Shovel strong!”

Alan nodded. “Indeed, ma’am.”

“Who are you…?”

“Alan. Alan the miner.” Alan gripped his shovel as if this explained everything.

But Lala’s mother shook her head in defeat. “There’s no way a shovel could…no, there are no weapons on this planet, no mortal who could defeat the Hydra.”

“Well, I’m not exactly mortal, so…”

“You only speak with such certainty because you know not the horrors of the Hydra!”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ve got a shovel.”

“Hah?”

I understand not the words of humans, thought Lala’s mother.

Alan slashed his shovel through the water, completely ignoring water pressure and forming characters with the trail of his “blade.” The bubbles along the shovel trail formed a set of words: “Hydra’s Secret.”

“Bubble Shovel. It’s a technique that uses bubbles to transmit information in the water.”

“Whaaaaa?!”

It was highly debatable as to whether the shovel was even related at this point, but that was beside the point. As he had done before in the Lactia Republic, Alan dug up information from the bubbles.

“Aha, I get it now. Once, the Hydra was a mage in the time of the ancient kingdom. He fell in love with a mermaid, but because he was of the land and she of the sea, his love was never fulfilled. However, he refused to give up on her and came upon a forbidden magic that would allow him to become one with the ocean. Unfortunately, this led him to fall to the darkness and he transformed into a horrid monster… I see.” Alan narrowed his eyes. “I have all the info I need. He’ll be a tough cookie, but I should be able to win.”

“Wait, no, what? Um? Huuuuh?!” Lala’s mother was beyond perplexed. How could this shovel man know the mermaid legend she hadn’t yet even told her daughter?

“Shovelly amazing! What a shovelly sad story…” Lithisia wore a melancholy expression and looked oddly crushed. “In pursuit of love, he tried to become the ocean itself… How very shovel of him…”

Catria had no idea what the princess was talking about, but she could at least tell Lithisia seemed depressed.

Alan nodded. “Anyway, that’s about all the information I need. Leave this to me, ma’am.”

Lala’s mother shook her head. “I-Impossible. Even if you could face the Hydra, we’re being held in a prison. There’s no way you could defeat the skilled mermen soldiers guarding us.”

“How many are there?”

“At least three hundred in the shrine. In total, I’d say about five thousand…”

“Got it. And how many mermaids are being held captive?”

“Huh?” Lala’s mother froze up just as her daughter’s face lit with hope.

“Alan!” Lala cried, delighted.

“Thirty-two, but…no, please, you must take Lala and flee…”

“All righty then. Just stay where you are.”

“Huh?!”

Zooooooooooom.

Particles of Shovel Power gathered at the tip of Alan’s shovel. Saving the captive mermaids would be simple. Rescuing people from underwater prisons was something of the shovel’s specialty, after all.

“SCOOP!”

As Alan shouted, splash splash! A mermaid appeared at the head of Alan’s shovel. She looked identical to her psychic projection—and to the little mermaid staring at her in bated hope.

“Mommy?!”

“Huh? Eeek…er, Lala?! But how?!”

“Aaaaah! Mommy! Thank goodness! Thank goodness!!!” Lala sobbed as she hugged her mother, who was floating without moving, still in shock.

Catria wasn’t much better. Whoa, c’mon. What the hell is this madness? I mean, I get that shovels are always ridiculous, but this is a step too far. I have no goddamn clue what just happened!

Even Lithisia was a little flabbergasted until she gasped and clapped her hands together. “I get it! Catria, I totally get it!”

“Please explain what you have supposedly ‘gotten.’”

“Shoveling typically consists of ‘digging’ and ‘burying,’ no? But when you shovel water…” Lithisia held her shovel in front of her and wiggled it through the current. “The action turns into scooping, right? In other words, you’re ‘removing’ the water! Hence, removing a prisoner!”

Catria felt like everything within her had become solid; air no longer passed through her lungs, and her blood no longer flowed.

“Sir Miner truly is shovelly awesome! I can’t even begin to hide all of my shovelwonderment!”

Catria felt her temperature drop. As she continued to sense the slow death of her soul, Alan continued to scoop mermaids out of their prison. Each time he waved his shovel through the water, a mermaid splashed off of its metal head.

“I get it! Since they’re mermaids, this is basically like goldfish scooping!”

“It is impossible to follow your chain of ‘logic.’”

“You should watch carefully and learn how to use this, Catria. Saving people is part of being a Holy Knight!”

“That may be true…but shovels have nothing to do with it.”

“I certainly think they shovelly do!”

Lithisia looked disappointed, but Catria refused to budge on this point. I’m going to save the world with my blade. Not a shovel!

“Great, that’s everyone.”

“You all here!” Lala crowed as she and the other mermaids danced in celebration of their reunion.

Meanwhile, Catria prevented herself from breaking out into a dance of confusion.

“Catria, it’s time to conquer the Deep Sea Shrine,” said Alan. “Come with me.”

“I’m not sure I’m up for this…”

“Weren’t you going to become the number one Holy Knight in all the land?”

“Ack!” Catria had no choice but to take this seriously once those words were tossed in her face.

He’s right. This shovel man and Shovel Princess are always being shovel-heads, shovelly…crap! What do I mean by shovelly?! I’m being corrupted! I have to hang on to myself. I have to keep my wits as a Holy Knight! I must! That’s right. I promised to become a Holy Knight and save the world from the corruption of the shovel! A-and I’m also going to save the mermaids! I’m going to become strong enough to save everyone!

Having managed to get a grip on herself, Catria drew her Holy Knight Blade from her back. “O-of course! Tally ho, Alan!”

“Perfect. First we’re going to turn the Deep Sea Shrine into the Land Shrine.”

“Hold up.”

Alan did not hold up. He pierced the water with his shovel ever so slightly, and suddenly a deep sea volcano erupted…right beneath the shrine. The titanic explosion caused the earth itself to rise above the water, taking the shrine with it.

The mermen did all they could to flee.

“See here, I dug up a deep sea volcano with my shovel.”

“Yes, of course, obviously.”

In a mere thirty seconds, the Deep Sea Shrine had become the Land Shrine. Alan and the others rose to the surface of the water to watch as the shrine shed sheets of water like a submarine coming up for air.

“…”

Impossible, Catria thought to herself before a chill ran down her spine. An eldritch malice emanated from the shrine. Something awful lurked within. Its monstrous presence was exactly the same as the Red Dragon’s in the desert nation.

“How dare you… How dare you take my precious mermaids!” A tidal wave of rage rushed out of the shrine and transformed into pure, overwhelming menace.

“… (Shoveling shoveltache…)”

Lithisia appeared to be thinking something as she set her gaze upon it. As for what that something was, there was little doubt that it was probably a shovel.

“You will pay!!!” the thunder roared.

The entire shrine shone a vivid poison green, and in the next moment, it transformed into a monster with multiple tentacles, not unlike an octopus. A glowing green aura surrounded every part of its body, and a noxious ooze dripped from its dangerous mouth. It was a horrible sight to behold.

This was the sea monster Hydra? No wonder the mermaids were so terrified.

However, Catria kept her cool. The Lernia Hydra was a dreadful sight and its aura was terrifying. However… “It’s certainly no shovel… Whoa, hold it!”

What am I thinking?! Has my thought process been corrupted?!

Leaving Catria to her panic, Alan made his move. When he flew into the sky, he collected the light of blue Shovel Power into the head of his shovel. The energy was summoned from the ocean, the mermaids, Lithisia, and even the Ultimate Shovel where it drifted nearby.

Power charge: 120 percent. Target: locked on.

“Wave Motion Shovel Blast, DIG!”

“OOOOUUUH?!”

KA-CHOOOOOOOOM!

Alan shot off a profound mass of energy from his shovel, one many times larger than the Hydra’s body. It tore into the ocean, cutting right through the temple and piercing both heaven and earth. Hundreds of giant tentacles were evaporated in the beam of light.

Welp. No mercy, as always.

Once the light vanished, all that remained was a handful of giant tentacles.

“Alan…Alan, amazing! Humans, amazing!” Lala called.

“Lala, it’s times like this that you should be cheering, ‘Hip, hip, shovelay! Hip, hip, shovelay!’”

“Huh? Oh, okay! Hip, hip shovelay! Hip, hip, shovelay!”

Lithisia was extremely satisfied.

The mermaids watched on in silence as the remains of the Hydra sunk beneath the ocean. Catria let out a tiny sigh. How anticlimactic it all was. A creature said to be a god of the sea stood no chance against the mighty shovel.

What the hell are shovels? Catria thought to herself.

SWISH!

“I’m…taking you…with me…”

One of the remaining tentacles thrashed. Its tip headed straight toward Lala at delirious speed. This was the Hydra’s vicious final attack, its dying blitz.

“?!”

Crap! Lala’s going to get hit! thought Catria. Alan hasn’t noticed the tentacle yet—I have to save her.

Catria swung her “Holy Knight Blade.” The tentacle was too far away. Her blade would never reach it. Nonetheless, Catria somehow felt like she could hit it. She could feel herself collecting holy energy from within herself and the Ultimate Shovel into the head of her Holy Knight Blade.

“Lala!” shouted Catria.

“Eeek!”

Without thinking of anything other than “scooping” Lala away from her current predicament…Catria swung her Holy Knight Blade toward the tentacle she couldn’t hope to reach.

In that instant, the head of her sword expanded to form a shovel.

“OOOOOHHH!!!” Catria cried out to the sky, almost as if she were being controlled by some greater power. “SAVE!”

SHIZOOOOOMBAAAAMM!!!!

She fired a beam.

“…”

The beam of energy ripped the tentacle in twain and its separate parts dropped into the ocean.

Catria came to after hearing the noise. “Er, uh, wha?”

In a daze, she stared at the tip of her sword. Something had definitely come out of it. A beam. It had been far thinner than Alan’s Wave Motion Shovel Blast, but she was certain she had fired off a beam of concentrated holy energy in the shape of a cross.

It might as well have been pure instinct. As if it were the most natural thing in the world, she shot a beam just by desiring to save Lala and believing she could.

“Thank you! Thank you, Catria!”

“Er, uh, um… W-wait just a second Lala. I…”

“Catria! You’re amazing! You really did a shovel!” Lithisia was so moved she was shaking her shovel. Her smile was radiant with joy at seeing one of her very own had awakened to the art of the shovel.

As she processed what had just happened, fear struck deep within Catria. Did I really just shovel?

“No, you’re wrong! Alan! You did something, didn’t you?!”

“Not a thing.” Alan landed on the ground and smirked at Catria. “Not bad at all. It may have been the basic terrain form, but you definitely just fired off a Wave Motion Shovel Blast.”

“I knew it! Catria, your Wave Motion Shovel Blast was just the most shovelingly beautiful!” Lithisia hopped up and down in excitement, her eyes glistening.

In contrast, Catria looked like she had seen a ghost. No, this can’t be. That’s impossible!

Alan continued to analyze her attack. “Your desire to ‘save’ as a Holy Knight and the concept of ‘scooping’ with a shovel came together.”

“No, no, no, no!”

“Whatever do you shovelly mean?”

“I just…that wasn’t a Wave Motion Shovel Blast!” Catria thought for a moment before yelling out to the heavens. “That was a Wave Motion Sword! A sword technique called, uh, the ‘Justice Stream’!”

“Jushovelream?”

“No! Justice! Even the incantation is ‘save’!”

“Isn’t it all the same, shovel?”

The three continued to go at it. Meanwhile, Lala and the other mermaids swam up to them. They expressed their gratitude one by one for saving both their people and Lala.

“Catria, you like Alan. Amazing! Shovelly amazing!”

“Stop it, Lala. Please! That wasn’t a shovel!” Catria’s cries disappeared over the horizon.

“Now then, everyone! Let’s have a Shovel Party tonight!”

And so the crew enjoyed a banquet of sorts at the Mermaid Oasis until late in the evening. The joyful Lala, the tear-filled rampaging Catria, and Alice, who was still asleep. The banquet continued deep into the night.

That was how Alan and Catria became a part of mermaid legend.

Unfortunately, everyone had completely forgotten about the Green Orb. It wouldn’t be until the party returned to Lactia that Catria would come to her senses on this very subject after they had already checked in to the inn.