Chapter 2: Firewood +1

"The Cold-Faced Pig-Farming Succubus": Mushrooms? Where are the mushrooms? I love mushrooms.

"Lu Ban, Five-Foot-Tall": Just outside the house, by the little pond in the yard, there are a few mushrooms.

"Got Nothing Better to Do?": Don't eat the colorful ones, but white mushrooms should be safe, right?

Jiang Ye: "..."

Jiang Ye felt goosebumps run down his spine as the little mushroom turned its dandelion-like umbrella cap, instinctively glancing around.

Good thing no one else was there. The mushrooms those people wanted to eat weren't referring to him.

"Phew..." Breathing a sigh of relief, Jiang Ye opened the chat panel again to see everyone already hotly discussing one hundred and eight ways to cook mushrooms.

Oh no, wait—ways to eat them.

Jiang Ye thought, from the looks of it, the other players were all normal, at least they still looked human. He was the only one who'd turned into a mushroom.

This was strange.

The little pale, chubby mushroom shook his head and closed the chat panel. He decided to make his way to the wooden cabin to check out his starter gift pack—maybe it had a secret potion to turn him back.

Boing, boing, boing.

The mushroom left the pond and bounced toward the cabin. Bouncing forward, making a sound that was both solid and light.

Creeeak...

The wooden door swung open easily as the mushroom head gave it a gentle nudge.

Jiang Ye looked up and made a mental tsk.

If the outside was an 8 out of 10, the inside was a 2 at best. It couldn't get any worse than that.

Who'd have thought a cabin that looked like it came straight out of a fairy tale would be so bare-bones inside?

The cabin was maybe ten square meters. A window, a wooden bed, and a chair—that was it.

The morning sun stretched the little mushroom's shadow long across the floor. The cabin's only window was on the wrong side, so the bright sunlight couldn't reach inside, leaving the cramped space looking somewhat gloomy.

The little mushroom hopped over to the wooden bed, looking a bit disgusted.

"Wooden Bed"

"A simple wooden bed, pretty rough. Resting on it for a full night will, most of the time, fully restore your stamina and health.

+999 Stamina

+999 Health"

A new system tutorial popped up in front of Jiang Ye.

Every item a player obtained could be checked for how to use it. All you had to do was touch the ear stud, and the item's info would pop up.

Yeah, real crude...

The wooden bed had no pillow or blanket, completely bare, nothing but rough planks nailed together. Don't expect it to be comfy—it was even covered in a thin layer of dust.

Jiang Ye thought it could use a good cleaning.

But not right now.

He still hadn't found his newbie gift pack.

He turned and noticed the chair leaning against the wall in the corner. At first glance, it looked slightly more "upscale" than the bed—at least it had paint on it, a white chair with a back.

But...

The mushroom touched its ear stud with a hand it didn't have.

"Broken Chair"

"A chair missing a few nails. Better not sit on it to rest.

-10 Health"

This chair was even worse than the bed.

Fortunately, Jiang Ye spotted the newbie gift pack inside the cabin. It was tucked behind the door.

The mushroom bounced over quickly.

"Beginner's Chest"

"A special chest. What's in it?

+???"

"Open the chest?"

Yes!

Jiang Ye silently begged—please don't let it be some grass-green thong. Mushrooms don't need underwear. Anything like Windproof Seeds, garlic seeds, or potato seeds would work.

The first step in a farming game was, of course, plant, harvest, sell, buy more seeds, repeat, and stack that cash.

The wooden beginner's chest popped open on its own, and a radiance brighter than the morning sun burst forth, so bright Jiang Ye could barely keep his eyes open.

He closed his eyes for less than a second, and when he opened them again, the wooden chest had vanished, and where the chest had been, there was now a...

Jiang Ye's brain short-circuited. Perhaps because mushrooms didn't have heads, thinking always felt like a bit of a struggle.

This was... a tiny tent?

Before him was a miniature tent, cream-colored, definitely not big enough for a person, but plenty for a little mushroom.

The mushroom touched its ear stud to check it out.

"Tent Cat Bed"

"A delicately designed cat bed, breathable and cozy. Tonight, sweet dreams are waiting for you.

+999 Stamina"

+999 Health

+???"

A cat bed? A cat bed? The starter pack contained a cat bed!

Jiang Ye's head was pounding, like someone had taken a Shiitake Blade to his skull—there was no other way his head could hurt this bad.

This huge farm had no cows, no sheep, and definitely no kittens or puppies—just a ton of weeds and Jiang Ye, one little mushroom.

Fine. Jiang Ye pulled himself together. A cat bed it was—at least it looked comfy, way more than that wooden bed. He could sleep in it tonight.

Jiang Ye decided to move the tent cat bed to one side of the room and set it up so the place looked a bit more organized.

The mushroom nudged the cat bed with its head—it felt heavier than that wooden door.

After moving the cat bed 40 centimeters, Jiang Ye was already sweating, little beads of water popping up on his white mushroom cap.

If only he had hands.

The mushroom reached out with hands it didn't have, trying to drag the cat bed with both of them.

Whoosh—

With a soft sound, the cat bed slid across the floor, yanked clean off.

Jiang Ye was shocked—the mushroom actually had hands.

Of course, the mushroom's hands weren't like human hands. They were made of mycelium.

When Jiang Ye reached out, two strands of mycelium shot out from the little mushroom's body, like fishing line—flexible, tough, and able to stretch really far.

The mycelium grabbed the cat bed easily and dragged it to the corner without breaking a sweat.

Whoosh—

Another soft sound, and a strand of mycelium popped out from the back of the mushroom's head. Jiang Ye was thrilled—being a mushroom had its perks. A mushroom didn't just have two hands; if he wanted, he could turn into a tentacle monster on the spot.

"How convenient," Jiang Ye said.

The mushroom's "third hand" wrapped around the broken chair leaning against the wall. The chair was in the way—you couldn't sit on it and it took up space—so Jiang Ye decided to drag it to the corner and fix it up once he made some tools.

The chair creaked as it moved, like it was about to fall apart any second.

Before Jiang Ye could even finish the thought, the chair gave a sharp, strained crack.

Crack!

The thin, flexible mycelium was at a loss—all that was left in the mushroom's "hand" was a chair leg. The chair had fallen apart!

The mushroom immediately bounced over with a series of thuds, muttering, "I didn't use that much strength, did I?"

The mycelium was way stronger than Jiang Ye had imagined.

"What now?" Jiang Ye worried. Without tools, there was no way to fix it. Maybe he should just stack it in a corner and deal with it later.

Crack!

Just as Jiang Ye made that decision, the broken chair, now missing a leg, let out another sharp crack.

The chair wreckage in front of the mushroom vanished, turning straight into a bundle of firewood.

Jiang Ye: "..." What... what the heck just happened?

He only knew that chopping trees gave you firewood—did breaking a chair leg also turn the chair into firewood? Was this seriously not a bug?

The mycelium couldn't help but reach out, like flexible, slender fingers, gently scratching the plump, springy cap of the mushroom.

Jiang Ye opened the system screen, hoping to find an explanation in the newbie guide. After five minutes of searching, he came up empty. He decided to hit the "Social" button and check the discussion board—maybe someone else had run into the same problem.

"Le Yi Li": Give me back my roguelike! Trash game!

"You Got Nothing Better to Do": Forget the roguelike, it's making me hungry! I need to eat! My hunger is only at 8!

"Lu Ban the Five-Footer": The young master wants roasted squab with Conti. Who's gonna give the young master a roasted squab? I'll pay 50,000!

"The Cold-Faced Pig-Raising Succubus": My hunger's already at 0, and my SAN's dropped to just 20...

"Wednesday No-No": Dude, I heard low SAN leads to bad stuff. Dude, you gotta keep your spirits up.

"The Cold-Faced Pig-Raising Succubus": Can't be happy at all, arghhhh!

"Sleep at Two": What kind of game is this? Is this the legendary weight-loss boot camp or what!

"You Got Nothing Better to Do": I'm starving to death.

"Lu Ban the Five-Footer": I'm dying of thirst. The young master wants some Conti.

To be honest, Jiang Ye was getting thirsty and hungry too. He took the chance to check his stats—hunger had dropped to 12, but his SAN was still at 95.

Jiang Ye thought, So I'm an optimist.

"Wednesday No-No": Five-Footer young master, there's water in the pond outside. You can drink some of that.

"Lu Ban the Five-Footer": You're the five-footer, your whole family's five-footers.

"Lu Ban the Five-Footer": The pond water's so dirty, how am I supposed to drink that!

"Sleep at Two": I know this one. Drinking raw water'll give you a stomachache and make you sick. Scoop out the water, put it over a fire, boil it, and then you can drink it.

"Lu Ban the Five-Footer": The house only has a broken bed, no kitchen. How am I supposed to boil water?

"You Got Nothing Better to Do": I don't even have an axe, so I can't get firewood to start a fire. What am I supposed to do?

"The Cold-Faced Pig-Raising Succubus": I'm out of firewood too. Can anyone sell me a bit?

Firewood!

Jiang Ye glanced over at the bundle of firewood next to him, way taller than he was. So firewood was that in demand?

"Mushroom Soup": How much for it?

The mushroom extended five strands of mycelium and sent its first chat message in 0.1 seconds.

In this game, players could not only sell items to NPCs but also trade with other players. There weren't many restrictions, and you had a lot of freedom.

The player named The Cold-Faced Pig-Raising Succubus immediately explained to Jiang Ye that for bartering, both sides just needed to agree, put the items in the shipping box, and hit the confirm trade button at the same time.

"The Cold-Faced Pig-Raising Succubus": I've got 10 maple seeds here. Mushroom, wanna trade them for your firewood?

"Ain't You Got No Work": Don't do it, don't do it. Tree seeds take at least a season to grow, they're basically useless early on. You're getting the short end of the stick, Mushroom.

"Ain't You Got No Work": I've got a bottle of ginger ale here, a rare find from the newbie gift pack. It restores 80 SAN! Want to trade? For the firewood!

Jiang Ye's face scrunched up in disgust. Even though his last name was Jiang, he hated ginger more than anything.

Jiang Ye thought to himself, you sure this ginger ale is gonna raise your SAN and not drop it?

"Smoked Fish King Wannabe": Grilled fish! I've got freshly grilled fish, want to trade for firewood!

"Smoked Fish King Wannabe": I used all my firewood to cook the fish and forgot to save some for a campfire tonight. I'm screwed!

"No-Go Wednesday": During the newbie protection period, you won't get attacked by monsters even without a campfire. No need to worry.

"Smoked Fish King Wannabe": No way, no way. I'm scared of the dark!

"Smoked Fish King Wannabe": Please, trade me a bundle of firewood!

Jiang Ye stared at the screen, his eyes getting wider and wider, and he couldn't help but swallow hard. So hungry...

Firewood for grilled fish, that sounds like a good deal, right? A foodie simply can't resist such temptation.