Chapter 24

“What is this?” someone asked.

One girl was even panting, clearly breathless and overcome.

“No… My consciousness… It’s fading…” mumbled another.

The Magic Barrier spells surrounding the arena began to warp and twist as they were swallowed up by the black ball in Luke’s hands.

It’s not just me… Everyone in the crowd is suffering too.

“Ah ha ha! What fine mana!”

When Abel looked again, the little ball in Luke’s hand had expanded into a massive globe.

The black and ominous sphere truly was a Dark Sun.

Abel felt the light fading around him.

I’m going to die… he couldn’t help but think to himself.

But…

“No!”

I can’t let that happen. I can’t!

Not here, not now!

“I’m not giving up!”

I can’t die here. I haven’t accomplished anything yet!

But reality was cruel, and Abel could not will his body to budge even an inch.

“My victory was inevitable!” Luke laughed. “Nice try.”

Move, damn it! C’mon, legs! Move!

But nothing happened.

Damn it… Damn it all… Ah, come on…

Why am I so…weak…?

Abel’s vision narrowed and darkened. In the last few seconds before all light disappeared from the world, Instructor Freya’s voice cut through his fading consciousness.

“That’s enough,” she called out, ending the fight.

***

The moment that Instructor Freya declared the match over, the massive sun that Luke had created disappeared from his hand as if it had never been there at all. The unique sensation it imposed faded too—the one that made Abel feel like his body was being pulled inside out.

The sense of complete powerlessness that comes with having one’s mana sucked out, and the way Luke looks down upon the pitiful wretches below him–oh, it’s all just too much.

Alice’s body tingled deep inside, and she felt her abdomen heat up.

It is so deeply unfortunate that those looks of his are not being directed at me.

“Luke truly is incredible…”

“A-are you okay, Alice? You’re breathing really hard, and your face is so red…”

“Ah…I-I’m quite all right. P-please leave me alone, if you would.”

“Um…okay then.”

Usually, the itching in Alice’s body would pass after a while—or rather, she could force it to subside—but it was proving quite persistent this time. Not only did it refuse to die down, it got hotter by the second.

I know what’s happening. I’ve been at my limit for so long now.

I’ve been holding back ever since that day, when everything changed within me .

Before I met Luke, I was confident that I was the most capable person in the world. I had never even doubted that fact. Everyone always looked at me in the exact same way, after all. Everyone except for Luke. That was what offended me so much about him. He gave me the same sort of look that I have been giving everyone else in my life. I wanted to utterly humiliate him. I wanted to break that arrogant heart of his, beat him to a pulp, and watch the hatred and disdain leave those eyes as a result. How fun that would have been! Just imagining him completely helpless, unable to resist, made my body tremble from the core.

But that never came to pass. I was the one humiliated at that party… I could not even offer him a contest. To him, I really was just more worthless rabble.

I was powerless.

Pathetic.

Miserable.

I found myself suddenly overtaken by dark and terrible feelings that I had never felt before in my life. That was when I changed. The emotions I should have detested turned to joy in my mind and eventually became love.

As I started to spend more time with him, those twisted feelings of mine continued to swell and grow. I didn’t understand it myself, but I felt it change me at my very core. I can never go back to the way I was. I do not even wish to.

But that day was also when my pain began.

He is never the type to slack off, and whenever I went to meet with him, he was always swinging his sword or buried in a spell book. It was as if he never even thought to look in my direction. He studies like a man possessed, as if his thirst for strength can never truly be quenched. That is when I understood.

His light is far too bright.

Light can spark hope, but when too dazzling, it hurts the eyes of those who insist on looking upon it and burns those who get too close. A light as bright as this can deceive, can drive others to insanity. That is what Luke is. How very ironic, then, that Dark is his element. Yet still I find that I love him… No, perhaps not “love;” this emotion is nothing as clear and pure as that.

What I feel is a terrifying, muddy, sticky sort of obsession. Perhaps it’s better called “dependency,” or more specifically, a “deranged love,” instead.

Before I knew what was happening, I found I could no longer imagine a world without him in it. He was never kind to me, never gave me any hint of whispered love. And yet I found my heart so thoroughly dyed in his color that nobody else could make their way in. I worked hard, tried harder than I ever had before—there was nothing half-baked in any of my efforts.

I was so desperate to capture Luke’s attention for even just a second. Those were difficult days. Whenever I had a spare moment, I devoted myself to the study of magic and, at night, fell into pitiful acts of self-pleasure to sate my worsening desires. Before I knew it, it had become a daily routine.

I told myself that this was just the price I had to pay to be so close to Luke’s blinding light. I thought of how easy it all would be if I could just forget about him, but it was no use. Once I had been entranced by that powerful light, I would never be able to pull myself free of it. But it was worth the pain, as Luke started to look at me from time to time. I was so happy, I could barely contain myself. No matter how hard things got, it gave me the motivation to keep trying.

But at the same time, I came to understand the bottomless nature of human desire.

Luke’s light has slowly seeped inside of me like a sweet poison.

More.

I need more, more, more.

Please, give me more, more, more, more, more…

My desires only expand and accelerate with each passing day. As my passions swell, the pain of enduring them grows more and more intense. Perhaps this was always my fate.

The day that I saw Luke’s Dark Sun for the first time, I felt something snap inside of me.

I think it must have been something like shackles, or a dam. My desires, no longer restrained, burst forth and suddenly flooded my heart. They overtook me in an instant.

***

“You’ll get breakfast and dinner in your dorms. There are a few rules, but you’re mostly free to do as you please. Oh, and do at least try to get along, okay? Things’ll go better for you that way. The moment you entered this academy, you were all more or less promised a certain position in society once you leave this place. One of the advantages you’ll get here is the ability to make connections to your peers.” The instructor finished her explanations and dismissed us.

“That’s all for today. Classes start tomorrow. Don’t be late to the ones you’re interested in.”

When I opened my eyes, I was in the dorms. My mind felt foggy.

The first floor of the dormitory was a communal space for everyone, while the second floor was reserved for the boys’ quarters and the third for the girls. I headed to my assigned room and quickly flung the door open. I closed it carefully behind me upon entry, making sure I remembered to lock it. I immediately fell flat onto the bed and burrowed under the sheets. My hand started to drift down below my belly button.

This isn’t good. I’m getting addicted to this. But right now, I’m so itchy, my body feels like it’s on fire. I’m so hot that it’s driving me crazy.

I rested my fidgety palm just below the waistband of my underwear.

“Mm…”

For a time, I pleasured myself in a vain attempt to let the heat escape my body.

But it’s no use.

No matter how much I touched myself, nothing satisfied me.

I knew it. Something broke within me today. Something that was holding me back.

I’ve endured this long enough, something said in the back of my mind.

I can’t take it anymore… I can’t hold back.

Before I knew what was happening, I found myself walking down the hall toward Luke’s room.

The rational part of my brain began trying to search for reasons to back up my decision.

I only recently finished my period, so I’m good there… And anyway, Luke and I are going to get married. We’ve already promised to spend our future together.

The thoughts brought me all the way to Luke’s door, and at that moment, a strange sort of nervousness started to spread through my mind.

But I’m too itchy for that now…

I made up my mind and knocked at the door. For better or worse, it opened immediately.

“Oh, it’s you . What do you want?”

He looked distinctly displeased, like he was looking at a piece of garbage, not a girl.

He doesn’t even hesitate to put me down.

Everything about the look excited me, stripping away the last thin layer of reason that I had left.

“Will you…let me in, perchance?”

“Sure.”

Luke was surprisingly compliant. I locked the door with my hand behind my back once I had entered.

“What do you think you’re d—huh?”

I took off my clothes quickly. I stripped everything off, even my underwear.

“Seriously, what are you playing at…?”

Luke didn’t bat an eye, but there was something different in his voice. It was so adorable, I couldn’t help myself.

“Mm…”

I pressed my lips to his and slid my tongue into his mouth. I pushed him down onto the bed as I tied our tongues together.

***

The morning sun shone in through the window, and I sat up in bed to look outside.

What a beautiful morning… Yep, so beautiful…

…

…

D-damn it all!

Men are such foolish creatures!

Thunk.

I banged my head against the wall.

This is awful. I’ve really stepped in it now. It’s like my reason wasn’t functioning at all. I never thought my first lesson in one-night stands would be so physical…

Damn it! What’s with the security in these dorms?! Is this what they meant when they said we were free to do whatever we wanted to?! This isn’t the kind of connection to my peers that Instructor Freya was talking about!

I took a deep breath and let it out.

I gotta calm down. I’m the one at fault here. I didn’t think I had so little resistance when it came to women… I’m pathetic. I guess I have been focusing completely on sword fighting and magic, huh?

“Morning, Luke.”

It seemed Alice was also awake. “You’re as good in bed as you are with the sword. You really are perfect.”

“Shut up. Put on some damn clothes.”

“Oh, don’t we have time?”

Damn it. I underestimated how much her looks would be a factor. I never expected they could become such a violent weapon.

“How about it? It’s still early. We could always go for another round, couldn’t we?”

I looked at Alice—her fair skin, her red lips, the smooth curves of her body. It only made my desires worse.

Ah… Really…

“Quick then. Get on your hands and knees.”

Men are such foolish creatures.

Let’s put a positive spin on this.

I’m only fifteen years old, and I’ve already been with a woman. I mean, that’s definitely a sign that I’ve conquered another of my weaknesses. This shouldn’t be a bad thing… Yeah. This just means I’m getting closer. I’m approaching true heights—places nobody has ever been able to reach before me.

…

…Ah, what am I saying?

Alice and I took turns in the bath.

“Why don’t we take one together?”

“…Shut up.” I need to shake myself free of this fog in my mind, wash this all away…get my head together.

As I washed myself, a thought floated into my mind.

Abel.

To be honest, he is insignificant. The strength of his physical attacks is unparalleled, but his technique is severely lacking. No matter how many times I face him, he’ll never be victorious if that’s the only card he’s got up his sleeve. As long as his abilities remain dependent on his mana and not his physical strength, he’ll never be capable of opposing me.

…Mwa ha ha.

I liked that look in his eyes. His heart still yearns for strength, unbroken even when confronted by the massive gulf in power that I showed him exists between us. He’s nothing like the “main character” that I imagined.

“Maybe I’ll be able to have some fun with this,” I said to myself.

It was then that I noticed the change that had come over me.

I think up until now I’ve been sort of scared, always on alert for the next potential defeat. That fear isn’t gone, but I’m enjoying this situation quite a bit. Hey, Abel, no matter how much stronger you become, I’m always going to be ten steps ahead of you.

So, struggle as hard as you can, eh?

***

We went down to the cafeteria, which was fortunately quite close to my room. When we arrived, I noticed the mean-looking red-haired boy I met the other day sitting quietly and eating his breakfast.

“I don’t like that look on your face,” Alice told him. “You’re making my morning rather unpleasant. Disappear, won’t you?”

“Huh?”

I frankly didn’t care what the guy was doing.

He’s just another member of the rabble; what he does is of no concern to me. And, hey, he might have a mean look in his eyes, but he’s just sitting and eating breakfast in silence. There’s no sense in bothering him.

It appeared that Alice didn’t share my thoughts on the matter. Alice didn’t hesitate to let her feelings be known about anyone she found even slightly unpleasant. I caught my first glimpse of that attitude on our first day at Aslan.

She’s really aggressive towards everyone except me. Sort of like a hero’s companion, but on the villain’s side. Maybe she was meant to be Luke’s heroine in the original too.

“Damn it.”

The red-haired boy turned purple in anger, and for a moment, I wondered if he might physically attack us. In the end, the aura of danger subsided, and he was surprisingly compliant in the end. He did exactly as Alice had asked, picking up his things and moving to a corner of one of the wide cafeteria tables.

“I am glad to see that you know your place. Come, Luke, let us eat.”

“Wait.”

I had a faint spark of interest in him.

“You. What is your name?”

The boy glared at me. “Lloyd.”

Lloyd, huh? Fourth ranked after that triple element user Mia. He might look like a delinquent, but he’s got talent. That just raises even more questions, though.

“Why did you do as Alice asked?”

Lloyd’s face twisted up in silent fury, and he clenched his teeth. It seemed as if he really hadn’t wanted to do as he’d been told.

But something inside him compelled him to do it… Something he can’t resist.

“Luke, who cares about that boy? Let’s hurry up and—”

“You be quiet,” I interrupted.

“I-I’m sorry…ah… ”

I could hear Alice begin to pant excitedly at that, but I ignored her. I wanted to know how Lloyd was going to answer my question.

“I was in the same section as that silver-haired girl during the entrance exam practicals.”

“Silver-haired girl? Just who do you think y—”

“Shut up, Alice. Don’t make me tell you again. Go on, Lloyd.”

Lloyd was silent for a few moments, his face contorted with humiliation and rage. Beside me, Alice’s breathing grew harsher.

“She was strong. Stronger than I am,” Lloyd finally answered. “Damn it.”

It was as if everything about Lloyd as a person was contained within those nine words.

“It ain’t like we fought each other… But I saw, and I got it well enough. I can’t beat her right now.”

“Mwa ha, I see.”

“You too, golden boy. I can’t beat you yet either… You’re meaner than that silver girl too. I didn’t even know how far apart we were… Tch.”

There sure are a lot of interesting students here, huh.

“But I ain’t givin’ up yet, see? Just you wait, bastard… I’ll overcome you.”

I had to chuckle at that. “You’re funny. I like that.”

I really do. How disciplined he must be to accept the orders of one he considers stronger than he is, no matter the insult that doing so entails.

“Hey, g’morning. You’re all up early. Mind if I join you for some br—”

“No. Be gone.”

Leonard appeared with a cheerful smile, which vanished like smoke within two seconds of contact with Alice’s mercilessly sharp tongue. He turned around to try elsewhere.

“M-mind if I sit here…?”

“Do whatever you want,” answered Lloyd.

“R-right, thanks. I’ve never felt so happy to be treated with kindness…”

Lloyd accepted Leonard.

Kinder than he looks, huh? He really is full of surprises.

“Good morning.”

“Oh, here’s that loud, irritating one.”

“All I did was say good morning! I am not loud!”

“See, she’s so loud.”

“Ah, I can’t believe you!”

Mia appeared in the cafeteria, and with many barbed words and much complaint, sat down near Alice and began to eat.

It looks like they’re fighting all the time, but those two might actually get along.

“You best be ready for me, Alice! I’m going to challenge you to a rank duel within the month!”

“Do so whenever you please. I will never lose to someone as half-baked as you,” Alice replied coolly. “You know what they say about being a jack of all trades, don’t you?”

“H-how dare—”

“You can’t go doing that, pipsqueak,” said another voice.

I figured “pipsqueak” must be referring to Mia. She also seemed to identify with the insult.

“Wh-who just called me pipsqueak?!”

Both Mia and I looked around for the interloper, and I was surprised to see that it was Lloyd who had spoken.

“Fight me first,” he demanded. “You lose a rank duel, and you won’t be able to do another for a whole month. You ain’t ready for the silver-haired girl.”

Mia gave him an appraising look. “You’re the second son of the house of Arbuthnot, aren’t you? Lloyd Iris Arbuthnot. I know you. They say you’re quite skilled at magic. So that’s what has made you so arrogant, eh? All right, let’s do it. I’ll show you what it means to be in another league!”

“Heh, great. C’mon and show me then, pipsqueak.”

Sparks flying at breakfast, huh? This academy sure is turning out to be an interesting place.

***

I took a few classes in the morning, mostly lectures on different elements. There were, of course, no practical demonstrations or magic duel lessons that I could take for my Dark element, but I decided that it would be worth taking classes in the other elements regardless. I was capable of absorbing mana with Dark, then using it to cast whatever spells I had absorbed, which meant that I was capable of, under certain conditions, using just about any element.

That’s why I thought that it’d be worth taking those classes at least, but I’m gaining nothing from them. The problem is how inefficient they are, spending ninety minutes going over things that I could grasp in five. If all the other classes are like that, I don’t need any of them. I’ll just make use of the instructors and the books when I have questions.

Right now, I’m in the Great Library of Aslan Magic Academy, and this place really is a treasure trove. It was worth entering this school just to gain access to it. If the classes are useless and I can’t challenge any of the upper­classmen to rank duels for the next month, then I’ll spend the time studying magic in here, I guess.

I’d found a couple classes that seemed promising, though, like one called Magic Pharmaceuticals. I planned to venture out for that in the afternoon, but otherwise, I’d stay holed up in the library. It’s about time I got moving if I want to make it to that class, actually.

“…Ah.”

I stepped outside the Great Library and immediately heard a voice. I turned to see Abel standing before me.

“H-haven’t seen you since yesterday…”

He was less than a commoner yet refused to address me with appropriate formality. Honestly, though, that did not trouble me.

I suppose that’s a sign I respect him. At least to some extent.

“Abel, was it?”

“Yeah… Um, can I call you Luke?”

“Call me whatever you please.”

Abel looked awkward and hesitant, constantly on alert for my reaction to his every word. There were none of yesterday’s injuries on him, despite the fact that they should have been quite significant.

Those priests sure are impressive with their Healing magic.

“You can’t use elemental magic, can you?”

He hesitated. “No. You sure know a lot, Luke.”

“What did you do all morning?”

“Oh, uh…one of the instructors, Brad, saw us fight the other day…”

“Oh?”

“He said he’d train me up good…sorta forced me to go with him.” Abel gave an exhausted little laugh.

Brad’s training must’ve been tough, huh? Well, he’s lucky. He’s got this power to draw the people around him to his side, which is fitting for the main character, I suppose. He’s a formidable foe indeed.

“Why did you come to this academy?” I asked.

“Huh?”

“Answer me. Quickly.”

“Ah, um,” Abel stuttered, “t-to get stronger, I suppose.”

“Why do you need to get stronger?”

“Well…” My question was casual and rather mundane, but Abel’s demeanor shifted completely the moment I asked it.

This might actually be interesting, I thought to myself with mild amusement.

“So that nobody takes anything from me again, I guess.”

Ha ha ha!

What’s with that look in your eyes?! Are those really the eyes of a main character?

For just a brief flash, truly just an instant, I saw black nothingness in Abel’s eyes.

Unfortunately, I don’t know much about the original novel. What happened to put that darkness behind his eyes?

“I see. And what if…?” I paused thoughtfully for a moment.

For some reason, I felt the urge to tease him a little. I wanted another glimpse of the abyss within him.

“What if I took something that was truly precious to you?”

Abel stood still and silent.

“You can’t beat me—you learned that yesterday, right? So, what would you do? C’mon, tell me. What would you do if—”

“I…”

I don’t need to be asking him this.

But I just can’t help myself. I’m dying to know how he will answer me.

“I-I…I would do what I had to do.”

Abel’s answer was simple, but I sensed the real meaning implied by those words. There was something dark that lurked behind them.

“Ah ha ha! Good answer.”

I won’t underestimate him. This unknowable strangeness is who he really is. Good. I’m sure it’ll pay off in the future that I’ve experienced it now at such close range.