The Determination of the Second Prince

The Determination of the Second Prince

I concluded my announcement to my sister and left her room, shooting a passing glance at her irksome guard. As I walked down the long corridor, a dazzling flash of lightning shone in through the window. The afterglow of the light burned into my retinas, causing me to squint. After a few seconds of delay, the responding thunder roared. The storm must’ve drawn quite close to the castle by now, and drops of rain mercilessly thudded against the glass.

There was still half a month before my scheduled departure, but I hadn’t expected that there’d be a storm on the day that I told Rosie of my intention to leave. It was almost as though the weather was reflecting my state of mind, which made me feel unpleasant.

Did she buy my lies? Did I manage to look like my heart was leaping with hopes of the future? Maybe she didn’t even suspect me. For all her intelligence, she’s oddly honest and easy to deceive.

I stifled a laugh while remembering the look on Rosie’s face when I revealed that my tears had been fake. She must not have seen that revelation coming at all; she’d opened her eyes so wide that I’d feared they might pop out of her head. Her lips had frozen in their half-open state, and her eyebrows had formed a steep arch.

She was so cute during those rare times when she pulled a silly face.

Noticing eyes on me from the end of the hallway, I silently came to a halt. There were two figures, and the smaller of the two was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed.

“Have you finished telling her?” the smaller figure asked. He pushed himself away from the wall, and his platinum hair bounced smoothly with the motion. He raised his head and opened his shining eyes. The pale flashes of lightning were reflected in his faint pupils.

“Yes, Christoph.”

One of the people who’d been waiting for me was my half brother. His features looked identical to our father’s, but their personalities were nothing alike. Unlike our father, who had no interest in his family, Christoph was full of kindness and concern towards my sister and me, although it was hard to discern that from his lack of facial expressions.

When I’d first been under his mentorship, I’d bridled at his strict coaching, but Christoph was just as tough on himself as he was on others, if not more. If he gave me one hundred practice swings to do, he’d also do a hundred without any comment. If there was anything I couldn’t get right, he’d stick by my side until I could do it.

Moreover, he worked our training time into his ridiculously busy schedule, but he never made me feel like I owed him. I could imagine his cool attitude giving him problems, but I rather liked his awkward and honest way of living; it reminded me of my sister.

Given the differences in our personalities, acting as friends might’ve been impossible, but in my own way, I respected and idolized Christoph.

“Did Rose cry? How about you spend the rest of the day with her?”

Christoph’s words brought an unbidden smile to my lips.

Tough on himself and tough on others, but his little sister’s the exception.

“She’s not that fragile,” I countered.

“Point taken,” he replied. Apparently realizing how overbearing his remark had sounded, Christoph’s eyes flitted around the room in embarrassment.

He cleared his throat.

Christoph’s calm and collected personality was so remarkable for a child his age, and seeing him embarrassed was a vast departure from his usual demeanor. The tall man who was also standing in the hall had slightly softened his expression in reaction to Christoph’s floundering.

“No laughing, Leonhart,” Christoph complained.

“Forgive me.” The man apologized with an expression that was unconcerned, and he didn’t look particularly ashamed.

He was Leonhart von Orsein, a knight enlisted in the royal guard, and the one person that I hated more than any other—the man who’d snatched my sister’s attention.

His strong build got on my nerves, as did his towering height and his handsome features, along with everything else about him. I didn’t know how to act around him—rather than taking offense when I glared at him, he would look at me with delight.

What pissed me off the most was that I couldn’t find anything about him to criticize. I couldn’t possibly ask, “Rosie, how could you love a man like him?” The only fault I could point to was their age difference.

Damn it.

I couldn’t match him in strength, looks, popularity, anything. He far surpassed me in every respect.

“Johan?” Christoph peered at me after I fell silent. “Is something the matter?”

“No.”

I exhaled, as though I was letting my gloomy feelings escape my body, and relaxed my fist, which I must have clenched subconsciously. My hands were bigger than before, but still small, too small to stop precious things from slipping through my fingers, however much I tried to hold on.

“Sorry. I got a bit emotional,” I said with a hint of self-deprecation.

Christoph furrowed his beautiful eyebrows. At first glance, he might’ve looked angry, but that wasn’t the case. He was probably concerned for me, in his own awkward way.

“It’ll be hard parting with Rose,” he whispered, his face meek. I found it strange that he didn’t phrase his remark as a question, but instead stated it plainly.

“It’s a little late for that sentiment,” I tried to say with a laugh, but my voice pathetically went hoarse.

Look at how unsightly I am, I thought. I wasn’t even strong enough to act normally.

It’s hard. Of course it’s hard. I’m leaving behind the person that I love the most in this world. Do I really need to say out loud that I’m hurting like my body’s being torn apart?

I want to praise myself for managing to smile at Rosie like it was nothing. My sister is my entire world. She’s the mother who’d held me softly in her arms, and the older sister who’d scolded me with love in her heart. At times she’d been the teacher who guides me, and she was also my first love, the person I look up to.

I want to always be by her side, to protect her with my own hands.

I’d believed without any doubt that, if we stayed in our small playhouse, my wish would come true. What a fool I’d been. I’d never even realized that she’d been the one protecting me all along, not the other way around.

My first step outside of our playhouse had taught me about the realities of the world, and how powerless I truly was. The revelation of how insignificant my existence had been left tears of frustration in my eyes.

Christoph called my realization growth, but it didn’t feel that way to me. He’d told me that as long as I spent all day dreaming of ideals with no understanding of the real me, I couldn’t hope to progress.

In that case, will this pain one day become my strength? Is it fuel to make me strong?

“It’s harder than anything. But I’ve made my decision, so I won’t falter any longer,” I declared arrogantly.

“All right,” Christoph replied with a gentle smile in his eyes.

He might’ve caught on that my brave face is only a mask, but never mind that.

I stood in front of Christoph with a straight posture. After looking him in the eye, I bowed my head.

“No matter what, I will obtain the strength that I seek and return,” I said. “Until then, Christoph, look after our sister.”

“Johan.”

“I’m not skilled with the sword like Leonhart, and I’m not a leader like you are, but I’ll show everyone that I can be a pillar supporting our Kingdom of Nevel in a way unique to me,” I declared.

My aim was to master diplomacy: the art of conversation, a quick-witted mind, eyes to assess situations with clarity, and connections with foreign powers. I wanted the means to fight back in case the day ever came when my sister faced the prospect of being used as a political tool.

Rosie was safe at present while our father’s interests were directed elsewhere. However, in the not-too-distant future, news of her intelligence would find its way to our father. When that happened, nobody could promise that she wouldn’t be sent to another nation and married off as a political pawn. I detested the idea of my sister going to some country to marry, and I’d be lucky if it were a friendly one, like Vint. The thought that her partner might be a prince from a hostile land made my stomach churn.

I won’t accept a future where my sister spends her days in tears. She’s my one true love. I need her to be happy, more than I do anyone else.

“You’ve grown up,” Christoph said softly under his breath.

I looked up. “Huh?”

“You’ve come so far from the days when you’d hide behind Rose while glaring at me.”

“P-Please forget about that,” I stammered. “It was a long time ago.”

As the conversation turned to the times when I was a selfish brat, my cheeks grew hot. I recalled the way I’d intimidated those around me out of a desire for my sister’s complete attention; the memory made me want to crawl up into a ball and die.

The way I’d hidden behind my weakness and yapped away must’ve made me harder to deal with than a poorly trained dog.

“I won’t forget it,” said Christoph. “Your growth—and Rose’s—is what keeps me going.”

“You know, Christoph, I’ve thought this for a while, but you’d make a good grandfather,” I jabbed sarcastically to vent my frustration.

“I’m well aware that I’m in touch with my older side,” Christoph said. He didn’t lose his composure. Instead, I was rewarded with a display of his magnanimity shoved in my face.

He reached out his hand and patted my head as I sulked. His touch seemed inexperienced, but strangely, it didn’t feel unpleasant.

“Come home safely.”

“No need to tell me,” I said, a little peeved at being treated like a child. I brushed Christoph’s hand away and put on a fearless smile. “I’m not as much of a weak little child as you and my sister seem to think.”

They probably thought that their youngest sibling was just a shy crybaby, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth.

One shouldn’t judge others based on first impressions, but rather, on how valuable they prove to be. Even if someone constantly got on my nerves, I was prepared to plaster on a smile if I could somehow make use of them.

Crocodile tears were my speciality. I could control my tear glands at will, but in some circumstances, using them in an argument would damage my reputation.

I must carefully choose when to deploy them.

“You’ve grown up tough,” Christoph said. Seeing the mischievous look on my face, he forced a grin.

“Yeah, I can take a lot of punishment,” I said, before lowering my tone as though telling a secret. “The truth is, I’m not afraid of thunder.”

Christoph tilted his head, puzzled about what I meant.